Apr 2018 Archive, part c

San Tulkas makes so much sense. I assume the original gifts were food, as seen in the traditional elven tale of Good King Wénceslassë. If we assume Tulkas set up shop right after the fall of Utumno, he would initially have been giving to the Avari - the Quendi who refused to voyage to Valinor. Given that the only Valinorean contact they'd had was with Oromë the Hunter, Tulkas probably took up hunting himself so as not to overly spook them. Then, when Men eventually showed up, he just stuck with it.

Now, the other theory I have problems with, starting the the fact that it's introduced with a reference to the Fifth Age. Tolkien was pretty clear that we were in the Sixth or Seventh (he seemed to view one or both of the World Wars as the changeover). So, tut!

I also protest the characterisation of Maglor. First off, who says Elves are white? The Noldor have always been the darkest-coloured elves (Galadriel's branch aside, House Finarfin is barely Noldorin); it's only our assumptions that make us picture them as paler than pale. Tolkien, notably, spent far more time describing eyes and hair than skin (assuming you accept 'fair' as not indicating colour). So the whole illusion aspect is irrelevant. (It also shows a kind of 'illusion' that doesn't appear in Tolkien - elven disguises were always item based, not 'magic' like that.)

Secondly, Maglor wouldn't be hunting the Silmaril! He threw the blessed thing into the ocean, why would he go after it again? Yes, the Oath was still out there, but he knew to let well alone.

I also highly doubt that any group of Quendi would take their name from a king of Numenor. I'm pretty sure 'Atanamir' means 'Jewel of Men', too, which (though connecting to the jewel theme) is distinctly human, not elven.

hS

I just got back into the works of Tolkien via Blind Guardian, and this hit the spot.

We know that agents do missions that never get reported - Jay and Acacia clearly aren't newly partnered at the start of Rambling Band. So a lost mission report just becomes an unreported mission.

I guess the other scenario is if a mission is actively deleted by the author, as in 'I am no longer happy with this'. I'd think that counts as removing it from continuity, which means the badfic was never killed at all.

hS

This leads us nicely to the "Subjugation" fiasco, where six agents were called in, two chapters were completed, and then nothing. Four of the agents showed up later, but still nothing is known. So is the badfic dead?

Thanks to everyone for being so friendly and the various virtual gifts I’ve received!
I’ll try and answer the various questions you all have. Okay...
I’ve read quite a few missions but I don’t really have any particular favourite yet.
I’m thinking Harry Potter for my agents, probably just the DOMS. I have a rough idea what they’ll be like, but I’m still working on it.
I have a question myself: how do you go about finding badfic? Do you literally just scroll through fanfiction.net, or is there some magic badfic-finder I haven’t found out about yet?
Thanks again,
Snowblaze.

Here, have some chocolate and enjoy your stay!

I'm Twistey, a 1-year-bie who has way too many ideas for writing stuff. I also have too many fandoms, and at least 1 OC for each one, if possible. So basically I just kind of jump between stuff.

So, what do you intend to do at the PPC? What kinds of sporking? What departments? Do you have any agent ideas? I'd love to hear what all you're thinking of!

And for your newbie gift, here's a bow and a quiver full of arrows dipped in this purple fantasy substance I discovered some time ago. The purple acts as an antidote to very specific kinds of Sueification. It also can break through pure Licht. (No, I didn't misspell "light". Look up the game "Lichtspeer.")

So anyway, nice to meet you! Hope you have a great time here and welcome to the PPC!

-Twistey

Here's a 6-pack of Bleeprin for you.

Have one of my own shed feathers and a complimentary kit of Spikes!

Have some luminescent bookmarks! Great for late night reading.

Please have a pot of black-hole coffee, and my welcome.

Hey! Take a bolter. You'll need it. The Sues are EVERYWHERE. EVERYWHERE.

It could be you. It could be me! It could even be- BANG!

What, he was obviously a Stu. Just watch, he'll glitter any second now. Look... see, glitter! wait, that's just blood...

Hmmm...

I think I may have just shot myself.

Have a laser pistol and a half-kilo of lembas.

(If you ever apply for permission, your agents would be very busy based off those continua. ;) )

A pleasure to meet you, in any case! What's your favorite mission, if you have one yet?

Hello, and welcome aBoard! For your newbie gift, take this plate of freshly-made SPaGhetti!

Lessee, you're already familiar with the Wiki, so I'm guessing you already know to look there if you've got any questions first. So if you haven't yet read them, may I point you towards the Original Series and the Constitution? They're pretty much the only required reading around these parts.

Hope you like it here!

I'm ready whenever you are.

Weekdays after 6:00 Eastern Standard Time usually work for me. I will be in and out through today as well.

Let me know when is best for you, and we shall see when we shall duel.

You didn't reply to my email about the new challenge date. Fortunately I'm free for a good chunk of tomorrow, so let's agree to meet up in the writing room @ 8:30 pm your time on that day. We cool?

I'm free almost all weekend—afternoons EST would be your best bet to catch me.

And in that challenge he had some 'mons, for [EAIUO].
With an Aurorus here
An Aurorus there
Here a 'rorus
There a 'rorus
Why are there so many 'rorus?
Old Huinesoron gave a challenge - [EAIUO]!

Anyway, you can see how seriously I'm taking this. ^_^ [EvilAI]UberOverlord, I challenge you! I'm, er... pretty much around from ~8pm until ~10pm UK time most days, though I may be able to wiggle that one way or the other, depending. So if you propose a day and time around that, I'll see what I can do.

hS

I'm available from about 7+ PM for weekdays, although that might be variable by an hour, and my weekends are pretty free.

Whenever's good for you, mon brave. =]

I'm a lot less free than I was in previous years. I can't do 8:30am-7pm BST weekdays because of work (and travel and eating), but I should always be available after 7:30pm. I'm also (slightly) more free on weekends besides 1pm-6pm on Saturdays (D&D time) and 1pm-6pm Sundays (family time)

Because I am dumb and forgot to put it in the above post.

Here.

That leaves a question. Where did your alias come from? ;)

Anyway, hi there! I'm Twistey, and high five, I like Star Wars too. Don't know much about those other two, though - yay, potential learning opportunity! I have a lot of fandoms, a lot of original worlds, and a lot of parodies. Basically, too many ideas and not enough time to make them all reality.

So, what do you plan to do here? Any agent ideas? I'd love to know more!

And finally, for your newbie gift, here's a piece of grey metal that fell off Das Executive Golem from Lichtspeer, as well as a piece of blue metal from over in Castle Wolfenstein. I haven't tried making these two into an alloy yet, but I have a feeling they'll end up being Licht-resistant. Do whatever you want with them!

Anyway, nice to meet you and welcome to the PPC!

-Twistey

Hi! Welcome to the board. Here is a replica of the Apple of Eden, have fun with that; just don't try the mind control thing, it won't work, it is only a replica.

Have a half-kilo of lembas and a laser pistol.

Here's a free 6-pack of Bleeprin.

Hey there, I'm Snowblaze. I'm quite new here as I only joined a few days ago.
For your gift, have some Bleeprin. You'll need it...

Hello, and welcome aBoard! For your newbie gift, take this plate of freshly-made SPaGhetti!

If you haven't yet read them, may I point you towards the Original Series and the Constitution? They're pretty much the only required reading around these parts.

Please have a bag of black-hole chocolates, and let me recommend you a quick visit and reading of both the Wiki and the Original Series. And welcome aboard.

Hello there.

Have a pile of multi coloured pens

Although reading Araeph’s angry rant was amusing when I found the PPC, this is the PPC I actually wanted to join much later. So let’s make this the new "FAQ: For Other People", but keep Araeph’s version for historical reference.

Should we vote about that, or just apply the Common Rule of Non-objection? So far, nobody said that it is not an improvement.

HG

Unfortunately, I don’t quite understand the answer to the first FAQ: What do you do?

... our characters travel into bad fanfics and sort them out by getting writing of certain descriptions, and then what? This may just be my lack of understanding of this alien language, but is it really sufficient to get the writing? I can’t determine whether there are words missing and what they should be. (Also, occular should be "ocular"; I didn’t change this yet because I intend to do all edits in one go.)

HG, going back to (proof)read the rest of it.

I wrote a good chunk of this, so I'm not going to do a ton of commenting. In parts I wrote, there are some minor issues with clunky phrasing (which I've just begun to try and sort, although some help would probably be nice if anyone wants to join in), but other than that I'd say at least the sentiments are the right ones. This is an FAQ that might encourage people to work harder at their craft, try and join the board, or at least see us a a more-or-less positive force. Rather than have them run screaming for the hills.

Excellent work, everyone who's contributed so far. :)

It looks like 'Aren't you flaming with your missions?' is still empty. I'll try and take a look and see what I can fiddle with.

hS

Featuring the painful adventures of an amateur technician:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/e/2PACX-1vTNo_ARgpgcA-T8NNKIUimSgt2C7G7kfU15CP96g_oApZx3D5PchoAJsQ5Ff2DbtF5xohmu-QwAbcCM/pub

I hope you enjoy this. I certainly did.

Here ya go, there's my thing. I probably took way too long and this thread'll probably be swept away into nothingness soon enough but HERE SHE IS KIDS.

I would love to be part of this. I'll have to read that fic all the way through later, as I have other Board things to do, but that looks really good!

-Twistey

This really is an interesting setting, and it's a good thing it's been resurrected. I might contribute to it one day, assuming I can actually work up the will to write. :P

However, there's one thing that bugs me about it. This is not the setting or creator's fault, but rather my own. For, you see... I took an embarrassingly long time to get Delta's ship's name. I will go sulk in my shame now.

I'll start brainstorming shortly.

Ah, how excited I was when I saw a Plortesque setting - but for science fiction, rather than fantasy! Ah, the wide vistas that were opened up before me which were all then immediately closed when everyone forgot about them!

But it's back baby, and better than ever. Or, er, untouched, I suppose, until we do stuff in it.

Anyhow, I might try writing something in it, especially considering my uni workload is kind of winding down a touch, now. Here's hoping it gets more love now than it did last time, ay?

You can watch starting from first year here.

For those of you who don't have the time or money to spare on this badly designed game, but who want to have a good laugh at the story.

This is a free to play game. Ostensibly.

In the game, you have a resource called energy, and in order to complete quests, you have to tap around the game world and complete various actions, which require energy to do. You're very generously given one free energy every three and a half minutes—otherwise, you have to buy more with in-app purchases.

In order to advance the storyline, you also have the option of purchasing in-game gemstones to unlock the story quests; otherwise you'll get waiting times of an hour, three hours, and possibly even longer in later parts of the game.

To say I'm supremely disappointed by this is putting it mildly. You already have in-game currency to purchase to customize your character! Blocking off the story until you either pony up the cash or wait for hours to advance?

Boo. Major boo. I'm going to keep playing because I want to know what else happens in here, but I absolutely refuse to cave and buy permission to play through the story right away.

[Tests] Yeah, the curly quotes after your URL aren't reading as a close-quote. You'll need to replace them with a copy of the opening quote (which is non-curly). It should also work with single-quotes, I think. (I'm guessing you put the post together in a word processor with smart quotes switched on?)

hS

I might have to check this out. Running around exploring a nicely rendered Hogwarts? Yes please!

Re. the image thing, it looks like you've got a curly quote paired with a straight quote, which would break it if that's what you were using. Stick to straight quotes for code.

~Neshomeh

She slowly backed down the corridor, her breaths becoming quick and shallow when she realized the teleport had failed. She bumped into something and turned around: a dead end, just a smooth wall with a mirror. She stared back at her reflection, gaze focusing in on the way her braces-covered teeth jutted out.

Laughter echoed in the maze and she flinched, clutching her Manual closer to her. She couldn't see the source, just an endless corridor full of mirrors. She began walking, her steps hesitant, nervous.

So many mirrors. Her skin crawled as her eyes shifted to glance at her reflection as she passed.

Her knees were too knobby. Her face was covered in acne. She was too tall and gangly. Her jaw looked crooked from the hinge glued to her teeth, and her huge, dorky glasses emphasized how square her face looked.

And those pigtails. God, what had she been thinking? Never mind how much her mother told her the knotted pigtails looked adorable on her, they were hardly considered attractive at her school.

She was too scrawny. Her boobs were too big, to the point where the other girls had tried stealing her clothes, demanding to know if she stuffed her bra.

The laughter echoed down the corridor again.

Her reflections began shifting slightly as she passed, and she knew, in the way one knows when one is dreaming, exactly what each mirror was showing her. She couldn't avoid seeing it. In that one—she was a failure. She was stupid. She was pathetic. She was useless. Worthless. Ugly. A loser.

Useless. Stupid. Pathetic. Worthless. Useless. Stupid. Pathetic. Worthless.

All her worst fears laid out for her to see, and she broke into a run, the laughter getting louder. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see other faces in the mirrors, faces she didn’t recognize, some of them not even human—but whenever she turned to look, she couldn’t see anything but herself.

She ran into a circular room coated in mirrors, and when she turned around to try a different path, she found the way out had disappeared.

"Stop it!" she screamed.

"Stop it! Stop it!" her voice echoed tauntingly.

"Leave me alone!"

"Leave me alone! Leave me alone!"

She dropped her Manual and covered her eyes, sinking to the floor.

"Crybaby! Crybaby!"

"She thinks she can be a wizard!"

"She can't even pass fifth grade!"

"Hahahaha!"

She screamed, and the mirrors shattered, the glass falling to the floor with a soft tinkle at odds with the reverberating screams.

When she opened her eyes, the room was clear of glass, empty save for her, her Manual, and... herself, staring at her with a curious glee.

She stared back. "Who are you?"

The other her smiled. "You know me," she said. "I've been with you for years now... that little voice in your head, that entity looking over your shoulder, watching every last little mistake you make..." She began circling, eerily reminiscent of a shark. "Do you have any idea how stupid you were to come here? No, probably not. If you did, you wouldn't be in this situation in the first place."

The would be wizard slowly crouched to grab her Manual, not taking her eyes off the doppelgänger. "Why are you doing this?" she whispered.

The doppelgänger laughed. "Why? Because I can. It's not like you've ever tried to stop me before. Loser."

She swallowed; her palms were slick with sweat and her knees were shaking. "You're my Ordeal?"

The doppelgänger rolled her eyes. "Uh, duh." The circling continued. As she walked, she began to change, going from knobby-kneed, acne-covered, to... beautiful. Breathtaking. Poised, confident. The doppelgänger stopped, spreading her hands and smirking. "That's the problem with you... well, one of a really long list of many. You're always too busy overthinking things. Idiot. Of course I'm the Ordeal; what else could this possibly be?"

She lowered her eyes, blinking back tears. Of course. Of course. She should have known from the moment she entered the maze. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

"You are stupid," the doppelgänger said coldly. "But hey, you're not a totally lost cause yet. Maybe if you ditched your Manual and went home, put all this behind you, accept you'll only ever be mediocre at best, you might actually be worth something." She shrugged. "Or you can stay in here and die of starvation. Seems more likely. Too dumb to cut her losses and run, and try to salvage what's left of your pathetic life."

"Why are you so mean?!" She burst out. "What did I ever to to make you hate me?"

The doppelgänger was suddenly standing in front of her, eyes blazing. "Absolutely nothing. And that's what makes it so. Damn. Easy."

They stared at each other for a long minute; the silence stretched between them, tension palpable. She was trembling; the words were familiar, words she'd thought hundreds, thousands of times before, but never had they come from such a familiar face.

The doppelgänger laughed and turned away as mirrors began to fade into existence, hemming them in together. "Oh, wow, you really think that?" She turned back, and her face had changed, mirroring the wizard's again. Acne, glasses, braces, and everything else that just emphasized how ugly she was. The doppelgänger opened her mouth, clutching dramatically at her cheeks. "Maybe if I wasn't such a failure, Mom would love me!"

"You're me," she realized, her heart sinking.

The doppelgänger applauded sarcastically. "Took you long e-freaking-nough."

"But if you're me," she muttered, "then that means I'm..."

"Your own Ordeal, yes, yes. Get on the same page already, gawd."

"Shut up!" she snapped. "I'm thinking."

"In your own slow, dimwitted way, maybe."

"SHUT UP!" Her voice echoed around them. "You're not—you're—you can't just say things like that!"

A soft light flared out from around her, and then faded.

"And why not?" the doppelgänger said, before she had a chance to wonder at the light. "You've been saying them to yourself for years! Why stop now?"

"Because... because..." She trailed off, closing her eyes. Every instinct in her body was screaming at her that she was about to say something she couldn't take back; that what she was about to say couldn't possibly be true, but if this was her Ordeal, and her small act of defiance had caused that light to appear... maybe this was what she had to do. Maybe... she just had to believe. When she next spoke, it was with the Speech. "Because you're wrong."

Light flared out around her again. The doppelgänger flinched back like she'd been struck. "What?"

"Because you're wrong," she repeated, more loudly, and the light brightened. "Because maybe I'm not the best at everything. And maybe I'm not the bravest, or the smartest, or the prettiest—but I'm doing my best, you hear me?!"

The light kept growing, and she began walking towards the doppelgänger, hands tightening around her Manual. "I took the Oath because it gave me hope! I thought I could finally make something of myself!"

"You were wrong!" the doppelgänger yelled, jerking away from the light as it reached her. "You were wrong, you're going to fail at being a wizard, just like you've failed everything else—"

"I haven't failed yet, though!" she yelled back, and hope swelled in her chest and the light brightened in a halo around her. "And if I haven't failed, there's still a chance! I can keep going and—and improving, and getting better, and nothing you can say will stop me!" She opened her Manual, running her fingers over its pages. "I will put aside fear for courage, and death for life, when it is right to do so—and I will not be afraid of myself any more!"

She pulled the stick of chalk from her pocket and crouched on the ground, beginning to redraw her spell from before, only this time, she made sure to get her name right—her real name, her name that was more than just her flaws and fears and downfalls, a name that was also her hopes and dreams and assets. Her doppelgänger screamed and raged, but made no attempt to touch her, and she tuned her out, focusing on her spell. This place, this… maze, she didn’t know what it was, but she knew it had to be destroyed before it could claim any other wayward souls.

“Alright,” she muttered to herself as she began working on the main part of her spell. “Alright, let’s see here…”

It wasn’t enough to just collapse this place like she’d originally thought. When she tried to listen to the walls, she heard nothing. Everything that was alive spoke to her, but this maze was… dead. No, not dead—worse. Darker. More ancient and evil, designed to prey on the lost and scared. How many other wizards had been trapped here when they failed to properly write their names, trapped and doomed to fail in their Ordeals?

Over the screams of her doppelgänger, she could hear whisperings coming from the walls.

The chalk in her hands was damp from sweat and her knees were covered in white dust, and still, she kept working, tugging her Manual along after her as she worked her spell. When it came to the part where she had to describe the maze, though, she froze.

What was she supposed to write? How was she supposed to know the words she’d have to Speak to collapse this place?

“See?” the doppelgänger said, breaking into her thoughts. “You’re a worthless, spineless, pathetic excuse for a wizard! Can’t even think of what—”

“Shut UP!” she roared, her shoulders tensing.

The whispering stopped for a moment, and then resumed.

She stared down at the circle she’d already constructed. This would take so much raw power to complete—if only she could figure out the words.

Her thoughts drifted back to how she’d gotten here, with her botched attempt at a teleport. Something in that spell had brought her here.

If this maze—this entity—didn’t have a life of its own, it had to draw its energy from somewhere.

From the mirrors. From its victims. From her.

Her hands shook as she wrote her name, her broken name. The name that she’d written containing only her worst aspects. And she mirrored it, and she twisted it into the warped abomination she’d found herself running from, and she sealed the circle.

“Don’t you dare!” hissed the doppelgänger.

She didn’t bother responding, instead standing up and dusting her hands off on her pants and picking up her Manual. And she began to read, weaving her spell as the doppelgänger screamed and thrashed and convulsed behind her. Sweat beaded on her forehead and she could feel her grip on her Manual becoming slick, but she pressed on. The light began to grow brighter and brighter as she continued to speak of light and life and hope. She spoke of joy and passion and of love, and the light grew brighter and the doppelgänger’s scream became even louder, threatening to drown her out.

There was a deafening sound of shattering glass, and she had to shut her eyes against the blinding light.

When she opened them again, the sky was blue and the grass was green, and a gentle wind caught her pigtails. She laughed and closed her Manual, falling backwards onto the grass and kicking her feet up in the air as she hugged her Manual to her chest.

She was still afraid, dreadfully afraid—but she wasn't going to let the fear hold her down like before. She had passed her Ordeal and she was now a wizard. Maybe not the best, maybe not the brightest, but a wizard all the same.

And surely, that had to count for something.





((Once again, a massive thanks to Delta Juliette for helping me out with this one and giving me the last bit I needed to make the spell feel right. Wouldn't have been able to do it without her.))

The sky outside the window of the Group Dynamic was warm and clear and inviting, with only the merest wisps of cloud far away. It was also an electric orange colour, as if the whole world was a street light. It hung serenely above an enormous plain, full of rich purple grasses and stubby, thick-trunked trees like fat acacias. There was one close by, and Siobhan could see a bright white fruit hanging from its boughs. Without really understanding how, she knew it was delicious, some distant bit of human ancestry screaming at her to eat it and find more.

The distinct lack of Norwich only made it more enticing.

The three Nigerian wizards from the next table over were the first to investigate, creaking open the door of the Group Dynamic as they cast a few spells to enable them to breathe. As intoxicating as the view out there was, Siobhan's head was still turned by wizardry, even - perhaps especially - when put to such casual use. She was watching closely as they stepped outside, but didn't quite see them leave. A blink at the wrong moment. She never was much cop at staring contests.

Seeing them out of the window, though, they seemed... happy. Much happier than they had in the pub. A few more wizards joined them, fascinated by the country they saw outside. And more. And more. And more. The hubbub was gone, now. Siobhan, Purple, and Wombat were alone.

"Why," said Wombat after a long moment, "are the bar staff still here?"

One of them made a strangled hissing noise that the two wizards understood as "More than my job's worth, guv."

Siobhan shrugged and looked at her blue Coke. "Does this... does this normally happen?"

"Eh, sometimes. But they put a sign up when they're going anywhere, and I've not seen it. Going off-planet like this unannounced? Screws up the coordinates for a claudication. Maybe I missed the memo or something, but I normally go, and Gary the Gasworks is usually pretty good about letting people on the mailing list know."

"So, you're saying that the landlord of this place takes the entire pub on a bloody interplanetary booze cruise?"

"No!"

Siobhan sagged a bit. "Let me guess. Gary the Gasworks isn't the landlord."

"Skree, chick, no flies on you, are there? How would he even fit? This gaff's not that big." Purple pecked at his pint of nuts. "Nah, Gary's just the bloke who sorts out the invites. He doesn't get offworld much, on account of how he can't move, so a bunch of local wizards help him get around."

"Wait." Wombat's voice was slow and incredulous. "Is he actually-"

"The St. Martin's gasworks, yeah. Nice bloke. He planned my stag do."

Siobhan stared into her drink for a while as she tried to process that. It felt a bit like her brain was starting to dribble out of her ears.

---

"Okay, time for another blue soft drink." Siobhan stood up. "Want anything, you two?"

"I'm alright, ta," said Purple. "Do you fancy something stronger?"

"Christ yes."

"Tough."

Siobhan came back with a tray a few minutes later to find Purple staring wistfully out of the window.

"Reminds me of Akosho Gul," he said. "I think it's the fruit trees. Probably the sky, too. You never forget your first new sky."

"Yeah," said Siobhan. "I don't think I'll ever forget this. It's so... so different."

"I just... I've got to go out and give it a try. Just one of those fruits. Don't worry, I'll ask first, I'm not a gannet."

"Okay. Just, you know. Be careful out there, alright?"

"Will do, chick. I'll save you some. Not a lot, but some." Purple took off from the pint glass and flew towards the door. "I mean, it's in my name, after all!"

Siobhan's eyes widened and her breath caught the her throat and she nearly knocked the table over as she scrambled to her feet but it

was too late

and Purple was out of the door and gone.

---

Siobhan dragged her Manual out of a pocket, brushed bits of grimy sand and desiccated crisp fragments off the cover, and slammed the book open on the table so hard that Wombat briefly became airborne. As with all uses of a Manual, it opened at the page she needed. As with all uses of her Manual, the information was couched in bone-dry academic prose and tangential examples from history, with spell diagrams beaten into bronze plaques or painted on cave walls.

"Are you okay, Siobhan?" Wombat's voice was shot through with veins of black worry like a marble statue.

"Emics and etics," Siobhan replied.

"Eh?"

"In-group and out-group analysis," she mumbled, along with more stuff Wombat couldn't hear.

"... Eh?"

"I'm an idiot. A massive, massive idiot. I got so caught up in magic and everyone else's magic that I forgot what was going to happen."

---

Purple soared through the door, dimly noticing the flash behind him, and he danced through the air until he collided bodily with the voluminous bum of an extremely confused elephant.

Once he shook the stars out of his vision, he looked around at the array of wizards...

Crammed into the Colman's mustard museum.

"... Oh, SKREE!"

---

"The fruit tree outside. I saw white, which is weird because fruit isn't white, it's brightly coloured to attract people to it. But Purple saw a purple fruit, because I want answers and he wanted... I dunno, lunch? The point is, what did you see?"

"... I thought we were floating in deep space or something."

"Because you don't really want anything, at least not that can be shown outside a window."

---

"You don't understand, Patience, she's not on errantry, she's on ORDEAL!"

---

"So, the question is: If something is so strange, so tempting that nearly every wizard in the building ran out to investigate, why didn't the snakes? No job's that vital, even bar work. Especially not bloody bar work."

"Okay..." Wombat looked even more frightened.

"So we've got snakes, we've got temptation, we've got a weird fruit. You see where I'm going with this, right?"

"Oh."

---

"I can't get into the pub," one of the orbs shrieked. "Something's blocked it off from me!"

---

"Took you long enough, didn't it, lad?"

Siobhan spun around to see one of the tree snakes glaring at her, a look of pure loathing in its eyes.

"I - I'm not-"

"Why are you so intent on denying who you are? Why do you think people can't tell? You love answers so much, answer that one, boy."

Siobhan felt the tears trickle down the curve of her face. Inside, she felt nothing at all.

"I'd like to speak to the manager, please."

"And what are you gonna say, boy?"

"The only thing."

---

Purple spun in mad, electric circles above the Princes Arcade, trying to cast a spell, any spell.

"SIOBHAN!"

---

The manager came down, and she was androgynous and dressed well and as beautiful as a dying star. "Now then, little wizard, how can I help you?"

"Fairest and fallen," Siobhan said, her voice thick with the effort of not stammering, not giving in, not letting everything win, "greetings and defiance."

hS

When I think of the books I like to reread, I find I can usually characterise why very quickly. J.R.R. Tolkien's Lord of the Rings is deep, with worlds of detail under every paragraph. Megan Whalen Turner's Queen's Thief series is incredibly clever. Rosemary Sutcliff's Eagle of the Ninth sequence is rich in history. Aaron Allston's X-Wing books are just ridiculously funny. And Diane Duane's Young Wizards series is absolutely bright with hope.

I mean that fairly literally. Unlike most fiction involving fighting an Enemy, almost all of YW takes place in the daytime, or otherwise in the light. Light, and bringing light to dark places, is a constant theme throughout the books - Nita and Kit's wands of choice are moonlight-soaked rowan and noon-forged steel, for instance, and two of the first three books include pivotal scenes where light is used to defeat the Lone Power.

This isn't to say that they're sheer fluff - Diane establishes early on that sacrifice is necessary to achieve victory - but even there, the light-bringing theme continues. I could name at least six or seven characters who give up everything to bring literal light in and against the darkness - and yes, it's heartbreaking, but it's also worthwhile.

Diane's hopeful approach to the series is also reflected in other ways. In the other four series I listed, one way or another the characters' goal is concealment. Frodo and Sam want to sneak into Mordor. Wraith Squadron want to trick the Empire. In all of those books, being spotted is a failure, and confronting the enemy directly an act of desperation.

Not so in Young Wizards. The constant message, shown through the characters' actions in every book, is that to turn back evil you have to stand up to it. Nita, Kit and their friends and family aren't trying to work around the Lone Power, to pull off their goals without drawing Its attention - they're trying to face It. Yes, they need to prepare the ground first, and yes, they may stay stealthy for a while during the preparation - but ultimately, they draw their circles, stand forward, and declare their greetings and their defiance.

It's a very different worldview to the one I usually read, so when I want to read something that puts a heartfelt smile on my face - when I want to remember that even when sacrifice is necessary, "there's always Timeheart" - when, in fact, I just want to feel better about the world - the Young Wizards series is where I turn.

hS

"He forgot the high-energy radiation again."

"He always does."

(And yes, I know I forgot to come up with a title for the last part of Marisa's story. |D 'The Flashes of Succcess', maybe?)

Anyway, a long while back I was scrolling through DeviantArt for Young Wizards fics and found... this old thing.

There aren't words.

Having tried a couple of impressionistic diagrams in the first thread, I thought it was time to step it up a bit. So, taking inspiration from Arabic and Georgian scripts, plus a bit of the Cherokee syllabary, I cobbled together a 'Speechesque' alphabet.

Yup.

Now, obviously the writing system is only half of the deal, and I didn't exactly feel up to inventing a language too. So what follows is a translated spell circle - the words are all in English, but in a curlier alphabet. (English orthography has been used, too - so the Welsh name 'Cafall' has been written 'Cafall', despite being pronounced ~'Cavalth'.)



(Larger version)

The whole spell (this is the one cast by Jacob and Lise to feed Bran power and banish the Afanc) is a single unbroken line, read counterclockwise around each circle in turn. Most of the writing is alphabetical text, but there's also a sprinkling of unique symbols in there - the upper-left circle (Bran's name) includes prominently both the dragon-sword 'Pendragon' and the infinity 'wizardry'. You can also find 'Pendragon' in the outer circle (over on the left), and the related three-symbol concept 'Wales' facing it on the right (the dragon there is the centre).

I did my best to make the image match the story. I wrote about how weird Jacob found Will's and Bran's names, and the diagram bears that out. Lise's and Jacob's names (bottom left and right) follow the same pattern as each other, differing only in the details. Will's (top right) starts dropping details, replacing his entire 'Present' chord with a quartered circle (that seems to kind of contain the symbol for magic). Bran's name not only contains the name of Wizardry itself (deeply unnerving, if you're a wizard), but also has two Future chords - one of which crosses his Past chord.

Finally: the spell reads counterclockwise and left-to-right, which means that every word of it is outward-facing. In other words, the spell isn't designed to be read from the inside (though that's where the wizard is doing the reading) - it's meant to be seen from the outside, by the rest of the universe...

hS

PS: The full text of the spell reads: "This is a power transference rekwest, target {Bran Davies}, for the purpose of driving from [Llyn Barfog] Afanc Darkborn [Pendragon]-banished Maidenbane. {Lise} as spell originator and power-donor/enactor alongside {Jacob} enacted in [Wales] and calling on the Old [Magic] and the Light: {Will Stanton}, High [Magic] implores aid for Bran [Pendragon]! Will you give power?"

I can't really write out the names in full because they rely a lot on contextual information from their structure. Jacob's 'past' line, for instance, reads: {mid [Lower Thames] natural [father's name] 46447.4 [mother's name] reader male-nonstereotypical past}, which is hardly human-readable. ~hS

(Originally starts here, for completionists.)

While the paralysis had faded, Marisa still felt like she was dreaming - and horribly lost. So, she grasped for routine, protocol.

"F- Fairest and Fallen, greetings and defiance!" she exclaimed - though it was really more of a squeak. It didn't even echo, not that that was the worst of her problems.

"Oh, come now," the Lone Power said; from where It said this, she couldn't easily tell. Not that she often looked at peoples faces in dreams, anyway, but if It wanted her unsettled It was succeeding. "You know this place; it's for fun times! ... Not that you've been doing your fair share of them, lately." It leered at her - or sure sounded like it was, at any rate.

"Or at all, really - you consume a lot more than you produce! And while I can pick up the slack, why should I care? An act of notcreation, if you ask me, is an act of furthering entropy!"

Marisa's eyes narrowed, and she crouched into a protective stance on the not!ground. /Where. Is. My. Manual?/

"Aawww, straight to business, you don't even want to talk? Such a shame. You know," It went on, "You could make a great attack dog! You know, if They ever feel like using you that way. Now tell me," And suddenly they had moved, nearly knocking Marisa off her feet. In front of them was something that almost looked physical, now - a line, a stream -

Data? Marisa thought, then quickly refocused. There was a stomp - whatever form It was taking here looked to be turning more humanoid as the conversation went on. All around them were now familiar words - familiar HTML-

"How does this make you feel?"

The text mess resolved itself into comments - the sort of comments that Marisa didn't like looking at. The disrespectful sort, the unintelligible sort, the kinds of people who got what she liked all wrong-

"See? You're shaking already." It was true - the reminder of humanity's dregs did her no favors, and she realized she'd clenched her fists down tight.

"They're- they're just you, aren't they? The parts of you that are in other people?"

She got the impression that she'd made It smile - not that she liked that feeling, either. "All people, but yes. And what would you do to them, if you could?" It was pushing Marisa for an answer, she knew, so she said the first thing she could think of that would frustrate it:

"Not kill them." Now It dissipated the comments, their surroundings going cold with Its temper.

"Oh really? And you think that you know what I know about you? Think carefully, now: what good is anger when it can't change people's minds, when there's nowhere left to go that makes a difference? You'll find yourself running up against that wall sooner than you think, little wizard - and when you go scrounging for answers, you may well think twice!"

Marisa tried to remember to breathe, calm and evenly. But it was hard.

"Besides," It said, cutting off her thoughts - or her attempts thereof. "Hate is only half of the equation. You wanted to know where your Manual is? Well," It said - and this time, Marisa could see It smile.

"Let's have a look. Just remember, these were your ideas - I just, how you say? Improved on them." Again the movement took hold, only this time Marisa was ready. She jumped, looking to tackle It to the "floor" in her anger-

She couldn't move, again. "Ah, ah, aah~" the Lone Power taunted her.

"Naughty wizard. Besides, it's not me you want to be aggressive toward now, is it? Well, not now now, just for a while now- Anyway."

Despite that confusion, Marisa tried to close her eyes - but couldn't.

I've never actually been to a convention (PPC Gatherings aside), so there's that extra air of supercoolishness at the prospect of meeting someone like Diane Duane. :D I hope you do get to go. (I won't be, of course - doesn't do to break a streak like this one!)

Fear not, no thunder has been stolen. ^_^

As to your question... if they were a wizard, yes. o.O There's a note on the Concordance that says wizardry is basically being granted the right to use the Speech in enactive form. For other people, it's just a language, albeit a super useful one because everyone understands you when you use it. For a wizard, though, it's much more.

This is the point where I throw in an obligatory reminder that one book does in fact feature the creation and/or visiting of an existing canon universe, with a brief trip to Middle-earth shortly after the fall of Numenor...

hS

This show has changed so much since its first season - it went from a wacky comedy of bizarre filler episodes with a few hints at deeper intruigue mixed in to a plot-heavy drama about the conflicts of different forces in this magical world, centered around themes like coming of age, navigating responsibility and attempting to come to terms with the injustices of the past and the deep-seated prejudices of the present.

I saw your message on my Wiki page after I very clearly told you to not do that.

I will not write a mission because you told me to. So knock. It. Off.

Please don't multi-post every topic you wish to discuss on the Board in separate threads. I speak from experience when I say that it clutters up the front page and pushes more important threads down and out of view, and in some cases off the front page altogether. If you wish to talk about multiple topics, either put them all in a single post, or reply to the previous post you made to keep everything on a single thread.

With that being said, the only mini-Boulder I've adopted is Indania, which was technically the first of, oh, almost two-score little quasi-sentient rocks from my second published mission. As a general rule, if I discover a new species of mini, I only adopt the first ever instance of said mini, so crystal skoal, being neck-and-nonexistent-neck with ndiana jones for the second instance, kinda lost out on that dubious honor. Considering that nobody else as far as I know has adopted any other mini-Boulder except that coprolite one that was given away during the 2015 New Year's Gift Exchange (I think firemagic's Ari received it), that means crystal skoal is technically up for grabs. So congrats, you now own a little round rock!

I'm not sure who is responsible for the ownership/discovery of the other two minis, but I guess you can talk it over with those people.

You've posted two threads in less than 12 hours and have two threads which you started by referencing Loud House on the front page. At present, you may have originated the most front page threads of any user here.

Relax.

Take it easy.

Give everyone else time to respond.

Maybe post threads a bit more conservatively.

"A Mighty Demon Slayer Grooms Some Ponies" was a good one. I say was because the author dropped the ball at the end and had to delete the chapter. What's still there is worth a look.

Then there's the "Pony POV Series" which has the previous generations in the backstory... but it might take a while to get to. The story is also worth a read, even if it's also quite long.

Let me know what you think and I can point you in the right direction.

Here, have a return cupcake. It's chocolate with chocolate chips and chocolate icing!

Haha! Met your reference with a reference! I'm proud of myself :)

Anyway, hi there Snowy! I'm Twistey, a one-year-bie who gets way too hyped over the smallest things, whether they're my own creations or other people's. I have at least one OC for every fandom I'm in... which is a lot. Oh boy.

Anyway, is your username the same on the Wiki? I'd like to look and see if any of your missions (if you wrote any) would be of interest to me. Just as a polite thing for a returnbie, y'know?

And for your returnbie gift, here's a bunch of lampwork glass beads. They're all shaped like various department logos and other PPC-related emblems, and there's one strand for each shape. Have fun with whatever you choose to do with them!

Nice to meet you and welcome back to the PPC!

-Twistey

Please have a pot of black-hole coffee.

Welcome back. Here's a voucher for 10 gallons of Bleeprin.

Congratulations on your new degrees! I hope we'll be hearing more songs from you eventually?

—doctorlit

I joined this great order after your time here. I bid you well.

Sorry that you came back to this corner of the Internet because That Series exists. Have some Bleepolate, since Thoth already offered you caffeine of some sort.

Congratulations on the graduating! (I finished up the requirements for a computer science degree (and a math one) a few weeks ago).

I hope you have a good time here again.

Have two cents, so you can put them in during discussions.

- Tomash

Welcome back! *high-fives* Congratulations on getting your certificate and your BA!

If it helps, I'm not sure how long ago you were around, either.

Have a Marshmallow! It looks like a normal marshmallow, but it has a face and acts more like a cat or dog. All the fluff, none of the allergies!

As per usual, I offer a Bolter, and a drink. In the past, we've had Mjød and Klatchian coffee, but we've been expanding! You can have Splot. Or, if you're not totally insane, klah. Or Amasec.

Anycase, fandoms? Tell us about yourself! (at least, those of us who weren't around last time).

And that leaves Avengers: Infinity Wars. Well. It was a well-done movie, but I can’t say I necessarily enjoyed it. Spoilers for Thor: Ragnarok and Avengers: Infinity Wars.

With all the characters they had to juggle, they did introduce them on-screen in a smart way. They basically went backwards through the Phase Three movies, so that newer watchers saw the characters they were already familiar with before characters who hadn’t done much recently appeared. (Although it just occurred to me that Black Panther got saved until last, but that’s probably unavoidable when the final showdown was being saved for Wakanda.)

Since they apparently felt some weird need to wipe out all of Asgard between this movie and Thor: Ragnarok, we end up losing Loki and Heimdall right at the start. They were both really cool and popular characters, so I don’t understand why we have to lose them. I am glad that they at least allowed Loki to demonstrate for once and all that he was truly allied to his brother. I don’t entirely understand how Heimdall was able to activate the rainbow bridge magic now that the bridge has been destroyed, but I’m not arguing with Bruce Banner getting rescued, so.

I was worried that the Guardians of the Galaxy wouldn’t fit in well with the rest of the cast, with their stupid potty humor and constant jokes. Fortunately, the potty humor was left out (so far as I remember), and while they still used a lot of humor, they were notably serioused up compared to their own titles. Their introduction was flawless, with the “Space” title card and the funky music. The theater filled with laughter at that point, as we all knew what characters were about to show up.

Basically all the fight scenes were great. Every character got at least a little to do. The alien wolf things in the end didn’t really pose much threat, but the four creepy alien generals who served under Thanos all felt very dangerous, and their defeats were very rewarding. One weak point was that the Power Stone and Reality Stone felt really weakened compared to their portrayals in Guardians of the Galaxy and Thor: The Dark World. They had seemed to have potentially deadly powers in those movies, but in this one, Thanos mostly just uses them to knock people backwards. Maybe he’s just not focused on them closely enough because he’s usually fighting too many combatants at a time, but it feels weird for the two most physically powerful stones to do so little.

It was cool seeing the Red Skull again. The MCU has killed off way too many of its villains, so it was nice to see one is still hanging around somewhere, even if he seems beyond the capacity to become a threat again, and might be a little repentant of his past? It would be interesting for him to interact with Captain America again, though I can’t see any way of that happening. Actually, I rather hope his spirit has been released to death now that he no longer needs to guard the Soul Stone. Regardless of his actions during World War II, he’s clearly suffering now, and keeping him around as a wraith can’t seem to serve any narrative purpose. (Plus, it looks like we’re not getting Hugo Weaving back at all, so.)

And, here’s the section that really matters. The ending. Since seeing the movie, I’ve had Boarders and real life friends alike explain that the characters who disappeared are likely to be resurrected in the next Avengers title. And uh. Well. THEY’D BETTER. I was furious watching that ending sequence play out. The entire theater was silent when the credits started to roll. Just seeing so many characters dropped off the face of the Earth setting with no fanfare, no real goodbye, was just disappointing and frustrating, and certainly not enjoyable. It doesn’t help that two of my favorite characters, Bucky Barnes and Maria Hill, are gone. And even worse, I now have to slowly continue watching the tie-in TV shows, knowing that once they reach the same point in the timeline as A:IW, that I have to watch a bunch of the Defenders and S.H.I.E.L.D. agents vanish as well.

So yeah. I don’t like seeing the bad guys win. I’m perfectly happy with the standard good guy ending. I don’t like thinking that so many characters I love are just gone right now, and I really want to “read ahead” to get them back, plzkthx.

—doctorlit, Infinitely Warring with his feelings for this movie

“You aren’t the only one cursed with spoilers, Stark.” “You aren’t the only one cursed with spoilers, Stark.” “You aren’t the only one cursed with spoilers, Stark.”

This is the second of the Marvel films I watched with my brother this weekend. Once again working off of notes I took during the movie. Spoiler warning for Thor: Ragnarok.

This kind of feels like they decided to throw Thor into the Guardians of the Galaxy setting/tone, and I don't much like it. The past Thor movies felt more like a high fantasy sort of tone, especially during the scenes set in Asgard. Raganarok barely spends any time there, and instead throws Thor more into comic relief sorts of settings and situations, with a lot of aliens with rather silly accents that don't really fit. They did do a good job of conveying that change, especially with the opening pop song, but it feels like a pretty lifeless way to send Asgard out of these movies for good.

I did like that opening scene, as the Ragnarok demon guy (Serta?) with his hordes of generic monsters almost felt like Marvel self-parodying a lot of their previous bad guys. It's funny that such a boring and ultimately unthreatening villain is treated so flippantly by the soundtrack, and pushed into a mostly meaningless intro scene. Of course, the fact that this character actually turns out to be a MacGuffin of sorts to defeat another villain later makes this even funnier. I liked him using Mjolnir to hold the dragon still as well. Even though we technically saw him do the same to Loki in the first Thor, it's somehow even better with a dragon. And of course, it's one of Mjolnir's final acts of combat . . .

The Actor Who Plays Odin and Whose Name I Should Probably Have Learned By Now Because He's Really Famous and Really Good looked like he had a really fun time playing Loki! It does seem kind of weird that when Thor starts overtly threatening "Odin," no one tries to stop him or even protests. Then again, Loki was hardly trying to keep up the Odin act at that point, so maybe a lot of Asgardians had figured him out by then, but knew they couldn't risk going up against Loki?

I have mixed feelings about Hela. I find her criticisms of Odin and Asgardian culture to be interesting (I love the stained glass falling away from the ceiling to reveal Odin's older history—gosh, Phase Three really liked tearing down father figures, didn't it?), and I really love that her motif is blades, even including her crown. Her constant barrage of limitless blades is a really cool and threatening fighting style. But at the same time, she's set up to be so unstoppably powerful that it's her combat threat that makes her boring, rather than her personality. She destroys Mjolnir seconds after appearing on screen, takes out two of the Warriors Three with basically no fanfare, and kills the third after just a tiny amount of fighting him. I'm glad Lady Sif's actor was busy filming something else, or we probably would have lost her, too. I did enjoy seeing Thor and Loki standing together to fight her without any real discussion, after everything Thor had to go through to get Loki to cooperate in Thor: The Dark World.

I love that Loki finally got his for-real redemption moment at the end, even though he had been ready to betray Thor one last time in the ship dock. He still made the right decision in the end, and wound up saving his entire people as a result.

Minor stuff:
-When Doctor Strange showed up so early in the beginning, I thought he was going to have a larger role in the movie, but it turned out to be a fairly short sequence. Oh well.
-The Valkyrie's theme music was really cool.
-Despite not liking the more whimsical tone of the film, I was very amused by the Grandmaster having what amounts to a theme park ride to introduce new combatants to his planet, complete with the hilariously out-of-place instrumental cover of "World of Pure Imagination."

—doctorlit didn't take any notes about the Hulk, it seems

"Why are you handing me the spoiler stick?" "Why are you handing me the spoiler stick?" "Why are you handing me the spoiler stick?" "Why are you handing me the spoiler stick?" "Why are you handing me the spoiler stick?"

So my brother made me binge the remaining Phase 3 movies in the Marvel Cinematic Universe yesterday and today, so that we could see in theaters today, since he's home from college for the week. I am even more woefully far behind on the connected tv series, which annoys me, but whatever. Since I had to watch three movies in a row without time for a review in between, I have pulled a Tomash and taken notes on the two I watched at my parents house. First up is Spider-Man, or as my brother's phone autocorrected it while we were texting about movie plans yesterday, "spooderman."

Spoiler warnings for Captain America: Civil War and Spider-Man: Homecoming.

I think I'll start with the villain. Firstly, I love that they even used the Vulture for this film, as he really isn't one of the better-known Spider-Man villains outside of the comics. He made a good, down-to-earth villain to match Peter Parker's inexperience, and the generally more mundane setting and tone of the film. I love that his rise to villainy is fueled by the events of existing films: The Battle of New York, the Triskellion, Ultron in Sokovia. The physical clean-up efforts are something that tends to get glossed over in superhero films, but this film turns it all into a plot point. I love the eight-year time jump in the early scenes of the film, because I literally didn't realize immediately that we were supposed to be looking at the same lab. Goes to show how so much alien technology can teach a team of construction workers in a manner of years, and how far they can advance that tech themselves. The line, "They keep making messes, we keep getting rich" ties in with the concept behind the Sokovia Accords in Civil War really well. You really feel a lot of sympathy for Vulture by the end, too, seeing not only how much he cares for his family (not unusual for villains nowadays), but also the fact that he comes to respect Peter well enough when he learns his identity to not only give him an out, but even to protect his identity after he gets imprisoned. It shows that villainy was never his goal or focus, and with nothing to be gained from getting revenge on Peter, he just doesn't.

I love the opening, and how it leads us from the information we already know about Spider-Man from CA:CW into the more present time period. First, I loved the light orchestration of the theme song from the old cartoon. The little flashbacks to the airport showdown in CA:CW, and seeing Happy again after being absent since Iron Man 3, were really cute. The cell phone, showing how many messages Peter has sent with no response, show not only the passage of time since the airport battle, but also how frustrated he must be feeling by now. I also liked the montage of simple, straightforward heroics Peter gets up to in Queens, showing his inexperience, and how different the conflicts he encounters are from the things the Avengers deal with.

I love the fact that after the point where Iron Man takes Peter's suit away, the tone of the movie completely changes for a while into a more typical teen movie. It also leads to such a hilarious way for the villain to discover the hero's identity, overhearing his daughter's conversation on the drive to prom.

All throughout the movie, I kept thinking to myself that the quiet girl was absolutely the best character in the movie. She's way smart and funny, and very ready to be critical of the world around her. I didn't understand why the movie was pairing Peter with Daughter Toombs, but of course the reveal that Best Character is actually "MJ," though not Mary Jane, explained why they set her up to be so important and likable.

String of random little things I liked:
-All the background characters in the school I felt were very realistic for a high school setting, though the tendency towards negligence in the teaching staff got a little over-the-top at times.
-Peter saved the deli owner's pet cat in addition to the owner himself.
-After crawling through his bedroom window onto the ceiling, Peter closed the window behind him with his foot.
-The corny Captain America PSAs, and how the teacher acknowledges he's a wanted criminal at that point. At least we know he was doing something besides exercising in between being thawed out and the beginning of The Avengers! (Still his original WWII era costume.)
-Iron Man's comment about the "churro lady" shows that he actually has been paying attention to all of Peter's communications, just not responding. I don't think Peter himself caught this, though.

And now presenting, some criticism from my brother! First, this gem: "It's too bad people don't look up in this movie." And he's right. There are an awful lot of scenes where, yeah, Peter's on a rooftop, but it's still very brightly lit, and it seems like other characters really should be able to see him from where they are, but they just . . . don't.

Also, some airplane criticism! (My brother is taking flight training courses in college to become a commercial pilot when he graduates.) First, the scene where Peter grabs the front of a turbine, and the turbine slips backwards and hangs out the back of the cowling (the tube containing the turbine). My brother said this doesn't work, because there should be a metal shaft straight up in the middle of the turbine that connects it to the cowling, and should have blocked it from coming out in one solid chunk like that. He also said the scene where Peter steers a plane by attaching webbing to the rudder and pulling on it is wrong. It's the ailerons attached to the back of the tail that cause horizontal turns. Turning the rudder would instead have made the plane start to plummet downwards, albeit at a steep angle.

—doctorlit does whatever a spooderman can

"I thought you said you didn't have any spoilers." "I thought you said you didn't have any spoilers." "I thought you said you didn't have any spoilers."

Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers!
Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers! Do not say I didn't warn you about spoilers!

Was that excessive? I would have used the gif, but I couldn't figure out how to paste it in, so... ¯_(ツ)_/¯

Anyway! Thoughts! I have lots of thoughts about this movie, hence why this won't be a proper review and more of a ramble.

First off, Thanos is the best Marvel villain ever. Period, end of story. I would have given Loki that title, but he dies a good guy, so it doesn't really count. About Loki dying, by the way, I really hope it is for good, because it was the perfect end for the character. It had him doing what he always did best: being a trickster, and even though it didn't work out, it wholly redeemed him (at least, that's what I think).

I love how the designated dwarf was actually really big.

Tom Vaughan-Lawlor as Ebony Maw was the absolute standout of this movie. I loved every single scene he was in. He was just so deliciously sneering and condescending without ever being over the top. The opening of the movie, when it's basically just him delivering a monologue, was the absolute best opening it could have. It perfectly set the Wagnerian, and (dare I say) poetic tone of the movie. Also, that Wilhelm scream when he dies made me snicker.

Gamora's death was a total wtf moment. I think I might have actually said just that in the theater when it happened. :P I... kind of hope she stays dead, honestly. I mean, I love Gamora as much as anybody, but after the emotion of that scene it would just be cheap to bring her back.

Speaking of wtf moments: Red Skull's return. That was completely unexpected. I mean, to be fair, when I first watched Captain America: The First Avenger I knew he'd be back eventually, considering that he was just transported across space by the Tesseract, but I just... didn't expect it here, I don't know why. Anyway, that was cool.

The actress for young Gamora was amazing and looked eerily like Zoe Saldana as a small child.

I have mixed feelings about the Iron Spider suit in this movie. It's really cool, but it also makes Spider-Man less Spider-Man and more smol!Iron Man.

I wish Hawkeye had been in this movie. I have no idea where he'd have fit in, but I just really love Hawkeye.

Shuri did not get half the screen time she deserved. This is a fact.

I absolutely loved this movie, even though it may not seem like it!

Not trading lives for victory (a.k.a. the opposite of the many before the few) is an amazing theme, in my opinion, and one that's all too sorely lacking these days. The means matter just as much as the end goal, and Captain America's refusal to sacrifice Vision (and the ultimate pointlessness of it when Scarlet Witch actually does it) embodies that perfectly.

On a much more shallow topic: so many hot guys in the movie, like... testosterone, my God.

The title dissolving at the end really hit me in the feelnuts. After everything else, it was just too much, but in the very best way. The entire ending sequence was incredible. I did not expect it, I was not prepared, it was devastating, I loved every bit of it while sobbing my eyes out. My immediate reaction after the last scene was "what did I just watch? What was that?" And I'm pretty sure that's exactly how it's supposed to feel. Did anyone else get serious Deathly Hallows Part 1 vibes at the end?

Do any of you suppose it's on purpose that 'Thanos' sounds similar to 'Thanatos,' the Ancient Greek word for death?

Last thought, only tangentially related: we hear that Xandar was devastated by Thanos while he was getting the Power Stone. The destruction of the Nova Corps is the origin story for arguably my favorite superhero of all time: Nova. Does this mean that he'll make an appearance in the upcoming GotG Vol. 3? I really, really hope so. Plus, the Nova Corps member who recruited him from Earth, Rhomann Dey, is actually part of the MCU, as played by John C. Reilly in GotG. I think there's a very high chance of Nova appearing soon, and I am ridiculously excited for it.

Right, that's it (for now)! Just... go watch this movie, all ye mortals who haven't. You will not regret it.

Passwords is 'Now what?' (with question mark, yes)

https://pyx-3.pretendyoure.xyz/zy/game.jsp#game=46

https://pyx-1.pretendyoure.xyz/zy/game.jsp#game=18

Password is Headquarters

Password is: Another!

I might be catching the East Coasters too close to dinner, but oh well. We'll see what happens.

~Neshomeh

I'll make sure to do that. But I'mma join the game first.

~Neshomeh

I give unto you a Neon Genesis Evangelion reference:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oyFQVZ2h0V8

When I looked at your specific post, all the text below it was boldfaced.

Anyway, congrats! Here's a Pink Slime (from Slime Rancher) as a good-luck-on-your-PPC-writing present! Its coral hue is scientifically proven to be the color of cheer.

In “Agents and RC“:
His family was descended, through distantly, from the blood of a hero who had ascended to become a Heroic Spirit.
I guess you meant “though".

HG

Do I know you?
I've certainly seen you both around, at least. Check.

Can you write (technical)?
I didn't notice any SPaG errors or run-on sentences. Solid.

Do I like your agents?
Their profiles look solid (Though I did raise an eyebrow at the 'warped' sense of morals for Alexander until you clarified it was thanks to his medieval upbringing), and I particularly like the detail about Ce'rana needing to carry an acorn from her home tree to survive. The control prompt mentioned her keeping her tree in the RC... I assume it's either been shrunk down and potted, or it's rather young?

Do I like your prompts?
I liked them! The bickering over how to move into the RC in the first prompt was fun and gives me a sense these two are going to argue about the 'proper' way to do things a lot, especially since it felt like both of them were convinced they were right and their partner was wrong. I liked the second prompt better, though—it showed how they work together, and it was creative in how the agents interacted with the Minecraft world to take down the Sue. And it made me actually laugh in places— “You know, this would be a lot nicer if you were a Ghast.”
The brightly-colored Blaze took offense to that, if the number of fireballs focused directly on him was anything to go by. in particular made me giggle.

Badfic?
Even I've heard of this. Looks good to me.



So, it is with great pleasure, I get to say...



(Other PGs, this does bring up a question, though—the last time two people applied to write together was for me and Randa, but since I was the main writer I was the one who got the Permission—I assume that, since Mikel and Cali are both going to be writing, they have Permission independent of each other?)

The website Television Tropes and Idioms (TvTropes) has seveal pages for fanfic tropes, some of which are staples of badfic. I've noticed that the pages "Draco In Leather Pants" and "Ron The Death Eater," which refer to when a villain is considered good, and also attractive, by the fandom, and when a hero is considered evil by the fandom, respectively, have ever expanding lists of fanfic where characters are ridiculously OOC.

I mostly look for more... racy fic than your average Sue, but I still look for other things on occasion.

What I usually do on fanfiction.net is exclude works under 1000 words, sometimes even works under 5000. Most of the things on the Pit are oneshots or just getting started, so it's hard to tell if they're going to be bad enough or long enough to be entertaining.

On AO3, I've found it useful to sort fics by how many hits they have. Oddly enough, the things with the most hits can sometimes be the worst fics around. AO3 makes it much easier to find badfic (or goodfic, for that matter) because of their tagging system; once you find a tag that has a lot of terrible things written for it, you can just search for that tag later.

Beyond that, there's a lot of reading summaries and hitting that "Next" button at the bottom of the page.

On the Pit, I set the ratings to 'all' and the language to English, which helps make things go a bit quicker. If I'm looking for an OC Sue, I add that filter on as well, but otherwise I just scroll and look for a summary that catches my eye.

If I'm in the mood for a particular type of badfic, I'll use the search bar and type in something like "lord potter' or 'veela malfoy' and go from there.

On Quotev, you can't swing a kneazle without hitting something hilariously bad, so for that site, I just bring popcorn and enjoy the ride.

Keep pressing "next". Make sure to go to different sites: for example, in the 40k fandom FF.net tends to have higher-quality content than AO3 in my experience, and other fandoms have it reversed. The larger your fandom, the more likely you are to find something, and the faster you can find it on average.

I am S.M.F. (or AutisticAce; either works), an avid Young Wizards fan and PPC mission reader. I've hung around for the past 4+ years as an audience (most of the time) and a beta reader (more than occasionally).

Any questions? :3

Hello, PPC! Well, if Iximaz counts as an oldbie, then so do I!
I am sonofheaven176, and I've been part of the Board since *tries to remember* 2012 at the latest, I suppose, but it could have been before then.

My fandoms include Pokemon, Bakugan: Battle Brawlers, and MLP. I haven't been on the Board much in recent months (so that might also make me a returnbie?), but my claim to fame around here is as a Beta reader, provider of concrit on PPC stories that catch my attention, and Latin translator (Google Translate SUCKS at Latin!)

I see quite a few new faces around, so...welcome aBoard!

Formerly known as DawnFire, until January 2017 when I decided it was time to switch things up. I joined in January 2013 and, as I wrote below, I'd been reading PPC stories for at least 4-6 years before that. Funnily enough, I wasn't planning to become a Boarder (just wanted to ask about using agents in an outtake for a Mary-Sue parody fic I was writing); instead, I got tempted into writing characters, and, in March, used a chapter of the same M-S parody fic as my Permission piece. In a nice bit of symmetry, I ended up changing my screenname in the same month I joined and becoming a Permission Giver in the same month I got Permission, four years apart. Things can change so much.

I...admittedly don't know exactly what to say here, so I'll just go with random facts that might be interesting. 'Zingenmir' is Yiddish (which I've been studying for...wow, five years now, if you don't count an after school club in elementary school). It means 'we sing', or 'we are singing', and should technically be written with a space as it's two words. 'DawnFire', meanwhile, came from a time when my friend and I thought up some names for cats from the Warriors book series for a game we were playing; funnily enough, she was Dawnfire and I was Brightshadow. I actually used the latter name as a screen name for a bit--made maybe two comments in the Deleterius LJ community back when it was around--but ended up switching to DawnFire (and adding the extra capital letter for aesthetics) for...reasons I couldn't tell you by now.

Speaking of Deleterius: don't know how many of you remember it. It was a sporking community (there's an article on it on the wiki). I've actually been very slowly reposting material from there that people happened to save, at deleterius.dreamwidth.org. I, er, need to continue with that at some point. In the meantime, there is some stuff already posted, and I have a lot more to add.

Like (I think?) a fair number of Boarders, I'm currently a university student. I've finally almost finished my first degree. I also really, really like language: I've put a fair bit of effort into learning them, and can currently speak, in varying (descending, in fact) levels of fluency, English, Hebrew, French, Yiddish, and German. I've wanted to be a fiction writer since I was very small; my parents are also involved in it (my mom writes fiction, my dad writes poetry), and my grandmother wrote various children's books. It rather runs in the family. I've so far been published a tiny bit--a short story in a magazine, and a creative essay (on that same grandmother, actually) in a book. Someday I would love to publish more.

What else can I say? Well, obviously, I like to talk :) I used to write a ton of Harry Potter fanfiction, most of which didn't get posted anywhere; going through that gave me a potential drinking game (for other people, I guess, since I don't really drink much). I have it written out in a document on my laptop. It includes 'time travel' (forwards and backwards), 'conversation happening in public that really should have waited to happen in private,' and 'AU.' I really liked my time travel. In fact, I still do. That and AUs: if you ever want to make me write something, tempting me with an AU idea when I have even a tiny bit of free time and energy will often work. It's probably part of the reason I love both RPs and things like the Badfic Games and writing things for April Fool's Day (which I unfortunately missed this year. The Purim RP may still happen at some point, though, albeit very belatedly).

What else? Well, I've got a ton of stories in the process, I adore animals (one of my roommates this year has a dog and it is happy-making), I enjoy crafts like beading and crocheting, and I've gotten really into baking (and cooking) this year. (Probably partly just because I'm now responsible for making all my own food and I...really enjoy getting a bit creative). The number of cooking and cooking show videos I watch has similarly gone pretty far up. I've somehow only just discovered Julia Child, though I'd heard of her years earlier; apart from her, one of the more interesting cooking channels I've found on YouTube is called Townsend & Son (or Sons? Not sure). It's basically seventeenth century cooking, mostly American and British, done (in costume and with replica instruments and, where possible and applicable, ingredients) by reenactors for reenactors and casual viewers who'd like to try this stuff at home. It's fascinating.

And I believe this is where I cut myself off. Have questions? Ask away! I probably won't talk your ear off quite as much as I have here :)

~Z

PS: Want my stories of 'aaaaah an oldbie is talking to me'? I don't remember too many details off the top of my head, but there were definitely some points at the beginning where I was pretty much skipping along grinning and going 'wheee I can't believe this.' Admittedly, a small part of that was because I'd thought there would be maybe three people still using the Board now and again, but a definite part of it was 'I grew up reading stories by these people and they shaped my fanfic and writing ideas and and and they're talking to me! How is this a thing?' Still happens a little sometimes, mostly with the people I haven't talked to as much. So that's cool.

(A similar thing also happened at some point with Scapegrace, and I think also briefly with Iximaz, despite the fact that both joined after I did. But that's another story. Er, two stories. And I'm going to actually post this now, before I end up checking the length and finding out I've written three pages...)

I joined in 2011, but I don't post very much because I tend to not know what to say.

For video games, I like Sonic, Zelda, Undertale, and Splatoon games, but mostly the Splatoon games. Lately, I've been playing Splatoon 2.

On my free time, I just lurk, hang around in chat, read sporkings on das-sporking, do greater-than killer sudoku puzzles, and occasionally read novels from the library.

Ozzielot

I have been since late 2002, when I needed an email address to discuss the upcoming Two Towers movie with a schoolfriend. I joined the PPC on Talk Like a Pirate Day 2003, and you haven't been able to shake me off since. ^^ I wound up here because someone pointed me at the Board in a review of one of my fics, and quickly made a whole bunch of friends (this was back in the days of Livejournal and MSN Messenger; Kaitlyn has discussed what that was like). Ten years ago now, I got married to one of them. ^^ I love this place and the spirit it still has, even if it is filled entirely with newbies (you know... people who joined in 2005 or later!).

I have a tendency towards deep geekery, of the type that involves mass fanon generation: I have a whole website devoted to crackpot theories on my primary fandom (Middle-earth, now and forever), and at various times in the past have concocted whole rickety fanon edifices around Harry Potter (the accepted history of North American magic is a classic 'written by the victors' scenario, and President Pickles' evil MACUSA refuses to acknowledge the wealth of native and black magic on the continent), Young Wizards (that one's still going on), and... a whole bunch of other stuff, to be honest. My writings for the PPC are very much the same thing, with the advantage(???) that my crazy theories end up becoming canon.

When not holding forth on obscure and pointless trivia, I have pretty much the least interesting science job you can imagine: I'm a computer-based chemist specialising in compliance with laws and regulations. Which... pretty much means I spend my time researching and holding forth on obscure and pointless trivia. Funny how that works! :D

I have trouble coping in large groups or fast-moving situations; that's one of the reasons for my perennial absence from the various chats. I am famously bad at finishing projects - most of my cowriters leave the PPC before we actually finish anything, and I have one mission that's still technically ongoing from 2005. I never say anything in ten words if a thousand will do. And when, about a year ago, I needed to email Miss Cam about something, I was exactly as terrified as all of you are around me. ;)

hS

I joined in January of 2010 and got Permission before the prompt system came into effect, so it's been a while, I guess. I am pretty busy most of the time, but have been trying to check the Board semi-regularly lately.

I have three kids. The oldest is probably older than a lot of people here, which is kind of freaky. He's graduating high school in about three weeks, and his Quizbowl team just won their third straight state championship. He gets to go to Nationals again at the end of the month.

My little Doomsprout will be ten in June. (I know some of you remember when he was just a little Sprout.) He's into musical theater (children's program) now, and just finished Treasure Island. I homeschool him and ferry him to various appointments.

I spend most of my online time on AO3. I've got some Haven fanfic on there. Heed the warnings if you decide to look me up. I play a lot of video games including Fallout New Vegas, 3, and 4. Dragon Age Origins, and just picked up the Deus Ex: Mankind Divided earlier this year. Skyrim in the past, but let the Eldest have it for now. I watch Warcabbage play things like Far Cry and Resident Evil. I like reading Origins fanfic, and might eventually get around to posting the fic I wrote for it. Maybe.

I'm a big Marvel fan, MCU and as much as I can get caught up on of the comics. I like NCIS, Stargate, Criminal Minds, and DCTV shows (I'm only about halfway caught up on them, though). Trollhunters, How to Train Your Dragon, Futurama, My concentration is bad (autoimmune disease) so I don't watch plot heavy things as often anymore.

It's really cutting into my reading, too. I have read multiple Hank the Cowdog books this year. The Sprout requires a chapter read to him as part of his bedtime routine. I talked him into Treasure Island in honor of his play, so a real book, yay!

Other stuff about me: I make hats on round knitting looms, paint little wooden toys, and complete shoddy carpentry projects (when my joints cooperate). I made a Hoppit Hole for the rabbit the Sprout wants to get. It's actually not bad for me. I like Pinterest and planning elaborate birthday parties for my kids until they get too big to want them. Futurama for the Sprout this year. The kid has literally watched the entire show (even the movie season) 14 times and is on his 15th round now.


QUESTION: For those who are fresher on Redwall. What do you think of it for a kid? All I think of when I think of Redwall these days is Stormsong's origin fic, and I can't remember how dark the real books get. (I know not THAT dark, but he is young socially speaking.)


Any questions for me?

I've been around since July of 2014, I believe, and may have been reading PPC works for longer than that - I don't know when I started but I apparently won't stop anytime soon. My personal definition is that the attendance range for newbies is about one to two years, middlebies would've been here from three or so years to around six or seven, and anybody who's been around longer is an oldbie. I guess the definition is highly subjective, though, so if you guys feel I'm an oldbie by chronological association (I joined not long after Iximaz posted their first mission, and they've been given the oldbie hat IIRC), then I suppose I can roll with it.

At any rate, I've been online since 2007, which was way back during my early days in college, so at the time I was just an innocent little... well... one of how many non-canon Skarmory pre-evolutions the Internet has produced. I say this because the first fandom I ever produced artwork for was Pokémon (which still is my biggest fandom today), and fanmade Pokémon specifically where why I joined DeviantArt in the first place - I'd seen some very good "fakemon" artists on dA and thought I'd give it a try. I think I've explained my online history since then a few times before, but I gradually expanded to other fandoms including various movies, books, TV shows, manga and anime, and even certain kinks!

Looking back, getting sucked into fandom at such a young age was both a blessing and a curse, since it allowed me to find friends and common interests at a much faster pace than college life ever could, but at the same time my skin hadn't yet turned to steel, so to speak. That left me woefully unprepared for the harsh lessons of social interactions online - and believe me, I did get in trouble multiple times both online and off for being a selfish egotistic little bugger, and I have no excuse for those actions. If there's one good thing that's come out of it, though, it's the personality equivalent of Skarmory's Silver Pokedex entry: "After nesting in bramble bushes, the wings of its chicks grow hard from scratches by thorns." In other words, the drama I'd accidentally caused and the humiliation I was rightly subjected to in retaliation caused me to wise up and begin to make honest efforts to become a better person. I think my family recognized this as well and the various social events and interactions they chucked me into during my graduate period helped me grow up just as much as my online interactions did. Of course, I do still make slip-ups every now and then, but at the end of the day I also have a better idea of working with how people think and feel.

Be that as it may, though, it should be obvious why I comprehensively disemboweled the one and only badfic I ever managed to complete for my first mission - it had always been my intent to spork it for my first outing even before I joined the PPC, let alone getting Permission. I understand that it was probably not the smartest move in hindsight and that there were plenty of safer alternatives to use as a jumping off point, but there was a lot of emotional baggage associated with that fic, so from my standpoint, I guess missioning it and exploring the legacy of said mission was the only possible way I could cope. It's kinda sad that I haven't been able to pick up that level of investment for any mission I've written since then, but I've already made it this far with my characters and I've got quite a few plans as to where they'll go in the future. I just need to find the motivation as well as the time away from Real Life things (and many, many other personal projects!) to return to PPC stuff, and hopefully interacting with you guys should help restore that motivation.

If you want to get to know me in other places aside from the PPC and the Discord, my DeviantArt and Tumblr handle are both SkarmorySilver. I had a Twitter for a short while but it's DOA, and while I do have both a Spotify, YouTube, and SoundCloud, those are largely for faving and consuming media content rather than producing them, so dA and Tumblr are your best bets. I've also shared my Gmail around here before (once again, it's the same handle as my PPC account) if you want to check me out on Hangouts, and though I don't use that as often as Discord nowadays, I may drop in every so often to check how some of my chatroom buddies are doing.

Tl;dr, I talk way too much, have feathers made of knives, and am far too busy with Real Life right now to do much else. Yeah, that's me. Ask me stuff! :D

It's been about a decade, I think. Although I certainly hope no one is feeling intimidated by me, as I'm hardly even a person.

So hi. I'm doctorlit. I am a workaholic with a psychological need to feel busy. I have little to no emotional spectrum to speak of (unless a hose gets kinked around me, in which case the Rage Glasses go on). I have difficulty understanding the emotions of others, and can barely tell people apart unless I've been around them constantly for months. I strongly believe in depriving myself of fun time unless I've run out of work to do, and am secretly obsessed with living forever.

I'm really stingy with money, even though I don't really need to be. Even so, I've amassed a large chunk of tv shows, books and games in my condo that I almost never touch, due to the previously mentioned fun deprivation, and a very time-eating zookeeper job at an understaffed zoo.

I have a large and complex spin-off planned in my head that weaves the stories of multiple characters together, but I'm also a perfectionist, so i write so slowly that I doubt I'll ever get it all written out before I die.

I don't really know what else to say about me. I eat, sleep, and job, and sometimes I do hobby work in between.

—doctorlit, or whatever there is of him

But I did say for people to talk about things, so what the heck?

Hiya, I'm Thoth, kinda-not-newbie-maybe? I mean, I've been around for most of a year now...

It seems I've earned some degree of respect, somehow, and I also got permission and did a co-mission. I'm honestly kinda baffled by all this, but it seems pretty cool? so I'm just gonna roll with it.

I'm probably the youngest member of the PPC Programmer Coalition, which exists because I say it does.

Besides that, I'm an avid reader (most recently, Neshomeh has dragged me into finally reading Pern), and a gamer, although most of the games I actually play on a regular basis released before I was born.

Also a bit of a computer history nut. So that's a thing.

Yeah, so... the oldbies were asking the newbies and whatnot to ask them stuff... and I'm a newbie? so I guess... the oldbies can ask me stuff?

What the heck. I've been grilling you guys, you deserve a free swing or two. :-P

Hello! I am Scapegrace. I write a lot more original fiction than fanfic these days, but I'm still a colossal nerd. My primary fandom these days is probably Worm, a web novel about a bullied teenage girl who has superpowers and eventually saves the world along with a ragtag bunch of misfits she was befriended by. Other fandoms include HP, Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell, Pokémon, Red Dwarf, Overwatch, Doctor Who, early Buffy, XCOM, and more besides.

My primary interest, however, is in robot combat. I'm an avid follower of the UK live scene and try to keep up with the US stuff. I have watched and devoured every episode of Robot Wars, Battlebots, Robotica, King Of Bots, Clash Bots, and This Is Fighting Robots (the last three are new shows from China). I am obsessed with combat robotics to the same degree that hS is with Tolkien and Ix is with Harry Potter. Does it constitute a fandom? I don't know. What I DO know is that it's a huge part of my life.

...

It occurs to me that talking about my obsession with murderously violent killer robots is not helping with the "fear not the oldbies" thing. Whoops.

I've been wondering for a while what the (nm) thing some of you put on the end of your posts actually means. Can you help me out with that, please?
Sorry, I'm far too curious for my own good.

Certainly don't feel like it sometimes, but it must be the old age eating away at my memory :p

So yeah... Hi I'm Novastorme, you won't see me posting on the board all that much, it's not because I'm not interested, I just don't have a massive amount of time on my hands. I will occasionally post writing prompts on the Board (yes, yes I know you're overdue one I meant to do it yesterday), and they're meant to be little things that don't even have to involve your PPC characters if you want. I'm more active on the Discord, although I do mainly lurk there, and then occasionally drop into the conversation (much like I am on the Board just with greater frequency), and I'm always interested in playing games (especially multi-player/co-op ones), so if there's a game you want to play with/against a Brit, let me know and I'll see if my laptop can handle it.

I don't write a lot, I have got Permission and have got a Prelude for those agents out (and nothing else) although I am currently planning missions for two other teams (when I find badfic for them to mission). When I do write it's more often than not either a little bit of one of the fanfics that I've got planned, or my own original story that has gone through more iterations than I care to remember. I also do quite a bit of online RPing on another forum, and that will occasionally bleed through into here, either with my want to get a D&D group up and running on our Discord (or maybe elsewhere if others want it there), or with some of my agent ideas coming from said RP's.

I can't remember any real embarrassing newbie stuff that I did, although I do remember Nesh saying that I had perhaps the cutest Mini-Aragog in existence, when in my first fanfic I wrote, (which was also a badfic) from before I joined the PPC (and in fact lead me to joining the PPC), I misspelled Hufflepuff to... Hugglepuff.

Novastorme
Who writes a lot and on second though can see why he could be intimidating.

Joined the Board as Barid, but changed it when I decided to make a self-insert...who may still be lost in HQ somewhere. Never did get back to him.

Anyway, I never was a newbie. I appeared on the board as a fully formed midbie. Mostly that's due to listening to Nesh talk about stuff while we were dating.

I write stuff, but only like once every couple of years (see: Agent Phobos, above) so there are a lot of loose ends hanging around. I do intend to get back to Agent Decima, Barid and Brightbeard, Agent(?) Phobos, Catastrophe Theory, Going Postal, Temporally Offended (still not officially a thing yet), Baron Phobos, Troll shenanigans. All of that stuff is planned, but in various states of disorganization.

A large part of the reason none of that stuff is getting done is that I spend a substantial amount of time being a semi-professional Magic: the Gathering player. I travel to regional events quarterly and grind local tournaments pretty constantly. I also write a Magic blog over at BadMoonMTG. I think it's pretty all right, but I don't have the time to really get it off the ground via social media.

Anyway, that's me. Now taking questions, I guess?

-Phobos

Like Juliette, I've been here about 15 years now. I can date how long I've definitely known about the PPC to June 2003, anyway, based on my ff.net review history. Probably a bit earlier. I turned 18 that month. I'm 32 now, and I live in Chicago with Phobos, my husband, who is also 32 now. I have a cat named Merlin. He is about 18. Behold my cat pics if Photobucket behaves!

When I was a newbie, I still spent a lot of time RPing on Neopets. This was one of my characters. *cringe* Some of the Boarders at the time (I don't remember who) gave me some good advice on making her less Sueish, such as not having her share a name with one of the Valar for crying out loud. >.> They also gave me some other good language/naming tips, which is why the ones there now aren't terrible. The PPC was the first place I met people who knew more about Tolkien than I did—like a lot more—and that experience was the beginning of how I learned to be less of an arrogant little tosser. ^^

The PPC also helped teach me not to hate slash and shipping in general by way of teaching me that asexuality is a thing. I am definitely demisexual if not ace; how I feel about it varies. I thought everyone else was crazy for being so into all that stuff. Turns out they're not—and neither was I for not being into it. Go figure! These days, I enjoy reading and writing good shipping of all kinds, and have even written some M/M smut that people liked!

I didn't actually write a mission on my own until 2007, because at first I wasn't sure about the whole Sue-killing thing and I didn't come up with characters besides my self-insert until 2005, when I started writing Supernumerary and Cameo for games of Fill the Plothole (which was totally doing it wrong, but we were bad at telling people "no" back then). I rather quickly realized Cameo was a terrible agent, though, so I was stuck again until Twiggy Papaya recruited Ilraen in 2007 and let me adopt him.

My earliest contributions to the PPC, around 2004-2005, were the Glossary of Useful Technology and the Substance Menu 2.0, which NenyaQuende was good enough to link from the PPC Handbook. I also did a lot of work on the <a href="http://www.freewebs.com/ppcmanual/index.htm">PPC Manual, Second Edition (which seems to be down again as of posting this; dammit Webs). And then the wiki came along and made it all obsolete. So when I have nothing else to do, I work on that instead. {= D

... I never have nothing else to do. I have too many things to do all the time. And that is why I rarely actually get anything done.

What else? According to every personality test I've ever taken, it is difficult to be more introverted than I am. Occasionally, the effort of making conversation feels so huge that I just drop off the face of the Internet without notice for a week or two at a time. To everyone I ever have left or will leave hanging in e-mail, as a beta, as a co-writer, or anything at all, I apologize.

I'm pretty sure I'm the original PPC tea nut. I'm just quieter about it.

Oh, people often wonder about the curly bracket in my emoticons. My favorite TV show of all time is Farscape. I will never stop trying to get people to watch it. My Internet home before the PPC Board was a fansite called Friends and Defenders of Pilot, and we used the curly bracket to represent Pilot's carapace. I never stopped. {= )

Um... yeah! Anything else you want to know?

~Neshomeh

hS gave me the crown of Oldbie-ness, even though I've not been around nearly as long as some people have—four years and a bit for me—so I guess it counts.

I love fantasy and sci-fi, and will kick your butt in Harry Potter trivia. Currently have big dreams to run camera for Doctor Who someday in the far, far future. I'm contenting myself with writing a very cranky Time Lord agent in the meantime. I've got a bit of a reputation for writing a lot and doing horrible things to my characters. It miiight not be completely unfounded.

I'm about to turn 21, want to do film stuff with the big fancy cameras, might or might not be moving to London in a few months. I'll know as soon as I hear back if I got accepted into film school.

As for stuff I got up to when I was a newbie: I introduced myself on someone else's introduction thread, accidentally put my email in the author spot, and then proceeded to let my phone's autocorrect Toey ruin my spelling for a while. Fun times... fun times.

I was realizing in Discord that this year will be my fifteenth year on the Board. I don't even know how that happened- although I'm pretty sure I have a lock on the record for longest hiatus for an active (ish) Boarder!

... So long, in fact, that I've got an entirely new self-insert for DoSAT. I should write that scene, new-me meeting old-me.

If I've given off unapproachable vibes, I'd be happy to try and change that. (For all I know, I've been doing a decent Tech-Priest impression around here.)

One thing that's suddenly seeming like a good idea is to do a bit of an oldbie introduction, so here goes: Hi, I'm Tomash! One of the main things I do around here is helping with technical stuff, like the PPC Board Archives and the T-Board (I did the programming for both of those a while back). I also do programming stuff in real life, and I'll be starting a Computer Science PhD at the University of Washington in Seattle next fall.

Media-wise, I tend to like works with sufficiently alien aliens (to pick an example, The Mote in God's Eye was good stuff, and I'd really like to convince someone else to read the Chanur books at some point). As is probably obvious from recent threads, I'm a Young Wizards fan. I'd definitely also count Harry Potter, the Culture series,Animorphs, and Anathem (which I highly recommend if you think you might be like me) among my fandoms as well.

I've also gotten into tabletop RPGs over the past year by way of the Dark Heresy campaign Mikel is running that used to be on the Discord (we moved to a separate server to avoid spamming everyone with dice rolls so much). That also happens to be how I got tossed into the 40k universe in the first place.

In random RL-related facts, I have a ham radio license that I haven't used in a while.

I'd also like to link my first post, in which I unironically plugged Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality and misspelled "goodfic", in order to demonstrate that even the Old Ones started out doing vaguely silly things.

So, uh, say hi! Ask me things! (In the event you don't want to do that on the Board, my email, which also works as a Hangouts username, is clickable above.) I'm also open to beta requests (I can mainly promise an earnest attempt to look for typos and small-scale flow issues, though.)

- Tomash