Aug 2017 Archive, part a

THE SCHOLARS (Scholar's Empire)
Infantry Civilization

Unique Bonuses:-
Hunters do +10 damage to animals and work 25% faster
Militia units upgrade for free
Units with a specific armour class gain +2 to that armour class

Unique Technologies:-
Vandam Tactics
Scholar foot units and all allied Unique Units gain +33% movement speed.
Researched At: Castle
Cost: 300 Food, 300 Gold
Base Research Time: 60s
Available At: Castle Age

Scholasticism
Scholar and allied Unique Units gain the effects of other civilizations' Unique Technologies.
Researched At: Castle
Cost: 1200 Food, 1000 Wood, 750 Gold
Base Research Time: 300s
Available At: Imperial Age

Team Bonus: The team bonuses of allied civilizations are doubled and affect all military units (where applicable).

Unique Unit:-

Van Guard
"A stalwart defender that excels at taking down other infantry"
Unit Type: Infantry, Spearman
Trained At: Castle
Available At: Castle Age
Cost: 40 Food, 40 Wood
Base Training Time: 18s
Base HP: 65
Base Damage: 5 Melee
Attack Bonuses: +5 vs. Infantry, +5 vs. Spearman, +5 vs. Eagle Warrior, +5 vs. Archer, +5 vs. Gunpowder Units
Rate of Fire: 2.83
Base Armour: 2/0
Armour Classes: Infantry (10), Spearman (10), Unique Unit (10)
Base Speed: 1.1
Base Line of Sight: 4

Upgrades to: Elite Van Guard
Base Upgrade Cost: 1100 Food, 700 Gold
Unit Type: Infantry, Spearman
Trained At: Castle
Available At: Imperial Age
Cost: 40 Food, 40 Wood
Base Training Time: 16s
Base HP: 85
Base Damage: 6 Melee
Attack Bonuses: +8 vs. Infantry, +8 vs. Spearman, +8 vs. Eagle Warrior, +8 vs. Archer, +8 vs. Gunpowder Units, +6 vs. Unique Units
Rate of Fire: 2.5
Base Armour: 2/2
Armour Classes: Infantry (13), Spearman (13), Unique Unit (18)
Base Speed: 1.2
Base Line of Sight: 5

===

The Scholars' Empire has that rarest of things, a trash UU that's actually decent. While it might not do the most damage, remember that it has a boatload of defensive prowess and gains the bonus from the Scholars', and therefore everyone else's, unique technologies. The Empire's a real team player, befitting its lineage as a centre of learning and receiver of tribute from far-off lands; its units, while advanced technologically, suffer for it. Their Stables is particularly woeful, lacking both Scale and Plate Barded Armour as well as Hussars, Camels, and Paladins, so if you fancy yourself a fast knight rush, pick someone else. Anyone else. Their real strength lies in early Feudal Age M@A harassment and fending off Dark Age wolf rushes. They're exceptional hunters, too, so luring Boar and ambushing Deer is very easy for them to do efficiently. Their University is completely full, giving them good defences, and they have Ring Archer Armour and Plate Mail Armour for their foot units. However, they lack the Arbalest and, crucially, the Cavalry Archer line at all. This is not a civ for horse lovers. Navally speaking, they're pretty decent, with an almost complete tech tree that skips only Fast Demolition Rafts and Fast Fire Ships. Their Monks are pretty good, lacking only Heresy and Illumination. Finally, they lack Stone Shaft Mining, giving them a pretty excellent economy tree overall.

Everyone - and I do mean everyone - loves being on a team with the Scholars' Empire. In one on one matchups, they can rely on the strength of their Elite Van Guard, but in 2v2 or more, the Van Guard line gets a huge boost. The Mongols give units +4 line of sight. The Indians give +10 damage against buildings. The Malians let everyone research University techs 160% faster. The Persians give +4 damage against archers. The Goths give a 40% bonus to Barracks output speed. And so on. It. Is. Insane.

Being such a team player does have its benefits for the Scholars as well. Their love-in with the Malians continues as both the Gbeto and the Van Guard get +5(!!) attack from Farimba, while the Magyars become very strong indeed when they remove the gold cost from all allied Unique Units. The Turks also appreciate the boosts to Janissaries now that both their unique technologies (+1 Range and +20 HP) apply to them. Finally, a team with Vikings, Aztecs, and Berbers gives fantastic unique units, as Genitours, Berserkers, Jaguar Warriors and Van Guards gain seriously potent regeneration and bonus damage across the board.

===

So yeah, thoughts? =]

HE GOT IT

HE HAS IT

He gots the perms!

The permission!

CONGRAGULATIONS, Ypsiman!

If only I could find some way to morph your name into some context-suitable version. But I, er, can't. I tried.

CONGRAGULATIONS ANYWAY!
Be real cool to see yer stories coming up!

Well, let's have a look!

Do I know you? Yup! I've seen you on the Board for a while, and I also remember you being active in the Discord chat. You're definitely an active member of the community.

The characters: I have a few questions, but they're mainly small. They are:

-This bit in Crim's profile: "He tends to act like he thinks he is better than everyone else, though he doesn’t actually believe as much and is only doing it for humor’s sake." It's a bit of a weird thing to do, though then again, people can be weird. You've got to wonder how he started doing it and *why*. Or does this only actually show up in lines like his "Don't call me boss, young lady" line in the second prompt? If so, this suddenly makes a lot more sense to me.

-Crim's relationship to video games. From Google, I understand that he's from a video game continuum, which I assume is why he got placed in the Video Games division. How long has he been an agent? Has he been taking on missions in any canon other than his own prior to being partnered with Cynthia?

-This bit: "[Cynthia's] black hair is usually tied back in a ponytail, which she claims is a purely functional choice. Nobody believes her." I'm not entirely sure I'm catching the meaning of this properly--is it that people believe she's doing it for beauty purposes? Something else that I'm missing? Wouldn't mind some clarification here.

-I'd kind of love to see Crim bore a Sue to death sometime, mainly because it sounds like it could be fun to read. That's just a comment, though, not a critique.

Overall: the characters look good! My quibbles with them are pretty minor; the biggest one is probably how on earth Crim got to the point of acting stuck-up for humor's sake. They generally look interesting and even relatable. I'd say they're good (though I would like those explanations!) But can you write well with them?

The prompts: It seems you can! I enjoyed both prompts. Your characters feel pretty fleshed out, and don't heavily contradict their profile descriptions. They also work well as a team--they bounce off each other very well, and I could imagine them working well together and creating interesting mission reports. I liked Crim's moment of awkward compassion after hearing how Cynthia lost her last partner, and I generally just like their dynamic. I also didn't spot any writing errors: if they're there, they're so small I couldn't spot them even after several read-throughs. I do have a small quibble with Crim's opinion on Loki--it's perfectly possible to know and like both Norse mythology and Marvel's weird take on Asgard--but that's a matter of my personal opinion clashing with the character's (and maybe yours?) and not an actual issue.

Overall: I liked both of your prompts. Your writing style is fun to read. Your characters have a good dynamic, and I want to read more about them despite the fact that I'm unlikely to recognize any canon they go into.

The badfic: ...okay. These are not canons I know in the slightest, despite recognizing the Pegasus Knight title (I know someone with a character who is one. That's pretty much the sum of my knowledge). I skimmed the first and last chapters anyway, trying to get a sense of it; the most I can tell is that the protagonist does have a bit of More Competent and Awesome Than You syndrome going on. Past that, I'll trust your summary, since you actually know the canons. If you think you can get a good mission out of it, go ahead. I do notice that it's characters from Crim's home canon being upstaged, so I could see this working well.

And I believe all that leaves us with is that...this all looks good! Permission granted!

Congratulations! Go forth and write :)

~Z

You have my Discord, right?

To be fair, Baron Huinesoron never mentioned the Meibot; he spoke of Barony July’s southern tip. In an attempt to be more specific, the keeper of the records mistook a tributary for the upper Meibot. The passage actually reads:

The relocation of Barony Huinesoron – a proposal by Baron Huinesoron to let him take the lands previously held by the permanently absent barons Araeph and July, but cede the southern tip of Barony July back to Baron Neshomeh (west of the Auriantym Chain) respective Baron Juliette (east of the Auriantym Chain), making Neshomeh the only baron in Wechi again.

HG

The shimmering blue likeness of the baron folded its arms and sighed. "I thought it would have been obvious I was in favor of—oh, fine. Consider this the tiebreaker vote. I'm in favor of letting Wechi and the Riding have a say in the Council."

During the Ispace Wars, I looked around for old OFUs to borrow characters from, and the SWFFA was one I stole wholesale. Given that the original is long gone, I took certain liberties with it - I'm pretty sure Leto didn't write himself as Lord Haven, and I'm not sure he even had an author avatar in there. (Leto was, by the by, probably the first Permission Giver after the original trio of Cam, Bast, and Thalia.)

I've had a couple of appearances from Lord Haven in the Ispace Wars itself, plus one standalone appearance set at the release of The Force Awakens. I did briefly consider writing a revived OFU for it... but decided against it just as quickly.

So for my part, I would be delighted to see you take up the mantle and start it off, either under Lord Haven, under new management, or as a second OFU (which has happened multiple times before, so don't feel shy about doing that).

hS

Much as I would love to get the original back in some fashion, I suspect it's gone for good . . . and Star Wars's canon has changed so much in recent years, I feel that a reboot is reasonable.

—doctorlit

I'm fairly sure hS adopted Lord Haven and the rest of the original OFU, so as long as he's okay with it I'd say go wild. Worst case scenario one of the original authors comes back and then we've got two versions.

Feel free to drop me a line if you ever need a beta. Star Wars is my all time favorite franchise, I'd love to see what you do with it.

-Badger, who spends far, far too much time on Wookieepedia

I mean, it's not that mini. But I can handle it within a single scroll, so it's a bit mini.

But, ey, I liked it! It's a real cool snippet into that sort of aftermath of those events, and it does a good job, I'd say, of getting that whole feel across. Get a really good sense of all the feelings in it - Alec's own responses to all that horrendous madness and also the sort of, return to the whole place. That whole 'sounds of chaos' bit was great, with that. It's pretty cool, I reckon, just how huge of a change this seems to be for your characters, too. Lots of area for character development and all other sorts of stuff. Nice that it's not just all static, y'know?

And, er, also, hello! You appeared and I didn't say hello because I was being squished by RL at that time.
So, hello! Good day!
Your first thingy you posted was bloody really good and funny, too, and I should probably read more of your other thingies. Unless RL squishes me again, in which case I'll imagine a potential alternate reality in which I'm not being squished and I am reading more of your thingies.

Poor Alec. I do think taking a nap is the most realistic first response upon getting home. I'm sure that's what I would do. I shudder to imagine the backlog of messages that must be on the console after three years, though . . .

Ah, so that's what he was keeping out of those reports. Sure wasn't expecting that, though that's partly because I wasn't aware he came from a crossover fic. I can't wait to start hearing some of Kitty's side of things; I'm sure her experience in Valcentica was even more wild than Alec's!

I thought for sure the summary was just being metaphorical, so I was surprised by the facial reveal at the end. Were facial marks a thing in Valcentica? I would say, "hopefully, he can get it removed" but I doubt you would have written it there if you intended to remove it . . .

There's one sentence where you've got "Flower" with a lowercase f:
"His console had messages from just about every flower telling him to report in . . ."

—doctorlit, finally caught up on commenting on current stories . . . FOR NOW

But it's *here*, and I *love it*. It's so fun to see new things from you about these characters. And I'm excited to see where you take the revision, too.

Also, wow, poor Alec. That Stargate bit is new, isn't it? I remember the pre-revision Team Phoenix as being actual canon characters.

~Z

Not really much else to say. It was short and good, and a nice light read.

I can't imagine waking up with a tattoo on your face is a pleasant experience, though. Time to break out the lasers! ...Unless it's Suvian ink and he can't get rid of it, which seems more likely. I can't help but wonder if it's going to have a bigger significance later on, though.

Give me your email address and we'll work something out.

While I'm a big fan of assassinations playing ironically,I find the twist you chose for this mission to be really interesting too. On a more personal note, I also like the way the part before the mission went.

I'll admit that I read the teaser a long time ago,but I remember Ave's lecture by Dawn, though fully deserved, was a more one-sided one, and appreciate the nuancing done. Oh, and of course, congratulations to the first supervillain of Middle-Earth, Sauroman. A clear win for him to brag about to Morgoth.

And discovering more abouut the other agents written by Zingenmir was also something I liked. Juggling with many characterrs and giving each of them their own identity is something really impressive.

Baby Elf, Ent-queen
This mission had a few little details that I really liked. Firstly, you guys did a good job of continuously reminding the reader of the disguises the agents were wearing at any given time. This is especially important for me, as I have a tendency to keep reverting agents back to their normal appearance in my mental image of the story. (Which gets especially silly with Zeb; no need for blue ion lions wandering around in Middle-earth!) I also like the detail of having the notepad, writing utensil and weapon change forms between the Orc and Elf disguises.

I also really liked every time Agent Dawn started sharing things about Arda. I'm far from being a Tolkien expert myself, so I found all the knowledge and facts shared here interesting and informative. The details about Elvish names at the end I found particularly fun.

The absolute best thing about this mission is the assassination fake-out. There's not a single thing in the whole rest of the mission that made me think anything but a standard assassination was coming, which makes the surprise all the more wonderful and funny. Even better than subverting the usual violent moment, you guys even turn it into an opportunity for some genuine cuteness, which helps to keep the three agents distracted from the awkwardness of their personal situation. It's just a creative and fun twist, overall; well done, guys!

Happy Error List Time! You may have already fixed some of these, 'cause I pulled this mission up on my phone days ago and only got to read it yesterday at lunch. Anyway:

"When it did down, a pair of fair-haired Elves were standing in their places."

"The Sue stumbled to her little feet and promptly fell over, tripped by her the giant green dress . . ."

"The child thought about it, leaning her head against Dawn arm and frowning."
(Did a bottle of Dawn detergent just grow an arm?)

Also, this may have been intentional just to make that ending scene less complicated, but Gwilithiel switched from being in Zeb's RC at the start of the mission, to being back in Dawn's at the end. I haven't read any Pern yet; I do know fire-lizards are pretty dang intelligent, but would it be able to get back into Dawn's RC on its own? I don't think the Aviator knows where Dawn lives to help it . . .

Anyway, off to read the interlude . . .
/reads interlude

Meeting the Exes
Oh. Looks like fire-lizards can teleport. Ignore that last comment in the previous section, then . . .

I enjoyed this mainly because it was almost a study in character interaction. Exposing Zeb to new and unfamiliar personalities makes for all kinds of fun and unique dialogue interactions. It just goes to show the wide variety of characters in Headquarters, and helps to make HQ feel like the bustling, populated place it ostensibly is. Nothing majorly fancy or plot-changing happened, but I like it just for how down-to-earth and realistically conversational it is.

The one thing here I didn't get was the two separate references to Dawn not wearing nail polish. It's been a while since I read other Dawn stories, so sorry if I'm forgetting something already mentioned, but is the significance of her having plain fingernails?

—doctorlit, always plain-nailed

My imagination went immediately to a superhero in a dinosaur costume, or being an actual anthropomorphic dinosaur, haunting the mountains until the word world realizes that he is supposed to be Saruman and at Orthanc. I’m not fond of the inflationary spawning of minis at any opportunity, and the mini manifesting at Moria when Gandalf spoke its name at Caradhras is I bit too convenient for my taste. The need to catch the mini (and then watch Sauroman the raptor instead) might have been a reason to follow the fellowship, or to quickly portal there and back again. But then, Dawn and Zeb had more important stuff to do.

The agents trailed after the Fellowship until they came to a stop at a short staircase. The Lady of Light appeared in front of them.
...
"Why did they bring the horse up so many stairs? ... "
What’s going on here? In the book, the fellowship climbed a long staircase to meet Galadriel and Celeborn. Since I don’t remember what was shown in the movie, the fanfic’s short staircase may actually be accurate to movieverse. But then, I don’t know much about horses, and even this might be too many steps. But then, it’s not even clear whether The Lady of Light appeared upstairs or downstairs. (Hey, it’s the Department of Inaccuracies trying to break through; don’t blame me.) Unfortunately, I didn’t take notes of a previous occurrence where Dawn appeared to base a comment on her memory of canon rather than on what had been told in the fanfic, and now I don’t find it again. Anyway, I’m snickering about the canon expert not actually paying attention to the boring fanfic, but I’m not sure whether I’m supposed to. Zeb wondering what "many stairs" Dawn is talking about might have helped to clarify that this is intentional – if it is.

Also, some typos:

The Sue stumbled to her little feet and promptly fell over, tripped by her the giant green dress ...
You need either "her" or "the", but not both.

Zeb hesitated, them gingerly picked her up, unsure if he was supposed to cradle her or hold her at arm’s length.
"them" should be "then".

The child thought about it, leaning her head against Dawn arm and frowning.
"Dawn" should be "Dawn’s".

Overall, this was a fun read. The end of the mission was unexpected but sweet, and I liked Dawn and Zeb’s pre- and post-mission interactions with the Aviator.

HG

And all I caught was a possible missing scene break. You might want to add a scene break before the paragraph starting "Inside the fic, Zeb ran a tongue over his protruding teeth and grimaced."

Also, are we seeing a possible Zeb/Dawn ship, or is it well and truly torpedoed?

Hello there and welcome to the PPC! I'm Twistey, an uberchaotic neutral lightly-used-bie, and I am currently learning Spanish, so I might ask you a couple things about the language. I am in a ton of fandoms, mainly because I get dragged into fandoms so easily (the most recent example of that being my being dragged into the Camp Camp fandom by my IRL friend), but I tend to focus most on fandoms that have good world-building, given how much I love creating fan content and OCs, as well as fandoms that can be taken lightly.

I don't know if there are PPC things in languages other than English, but I'll see if the oldbies would be okay with starting translated Wikis.

Do you have any characters who you want to make into agents? I'd love to read about them and give any critiques I have! Nice to meet you, Diana!

-Twistey

Have two cents, so you can put them into discussions.

- Tomash

Here's a tote bag with your Overwatch main!

Please have a pot of black-hole coffee. Welcome here, hope you'll like the madhouse.

Welcome to the board! Here, have a replica of Murasame from Akame ga Kill. It can't do a one hit kill, but it's still very sharp.

Have an araucaria cone! I don't think have anything in any language other than English, although if there were people willing to maintain content in other languages, there's no reason we couldn't/

Have some SPAGhetti- for help with your writing! I received your audition for the Musical, by the way, and I'm gonna listen to it tonight when I have time. Thanks!

Have a pile of multi coloured pens.

First of all, let me say welcome, and please take this plate of freshly-made SPaGhetti!

As far as I know, most PPCers speak English only, though I do know of one instance where an Italian Boarder tackled one of his old badfics that was written in Italian and was translated into English for those of us who don't speak Italian. If you wanted to translate missions, with their authors' permission, maybe you could do something similar?

Anyway, I hope you decide to stick around!

I am currently into Kuroko no Basuke, Game of Thrones, Re:Creators, and a bit of Arslan Senki. Manga-only, there's also Historie and Vinland Saga. Do you write fanfics or just read them?

Oh, and here's a gift for you, a nylon replica of Gae Bolg. You are supposed to launch it with your left foot, but be prepared to be disappointed.

My phone is being weird and the post option disappears if the message gets longer than this.

They couldn't leave a person in need of constant supervision in the infirmary all the time. The doctor would have to be able to focus o current emergencies. And they wouldn't even leave Suder locked up in tbe cells.

Here, have a light-up plastic Spear of Destiny and some 3D-printed action figures. Because imaginary Wolfenstein 3D fan merch is what I do.

-Twistey

Or late birthday depending on what time zone you're in!

You're twenty?!

You have a voice like an ageless robot, and the dirty, dirty mind of either a boy of nine who's just learnt dirtiness, or a very, very old man of eighty who cares not for morals any more.

So I suppose if you add all those up and look at the average... that looks about twenty?
I guess?
Either way


HAPPY BIRTHDAY HARDPY BIRDTHAYY SORRY I DIDN'T SEE THIS EARLIER

HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
MAY ALL YOUR WISHES COME TRUE
HOPE NOBODY MAKES YOU BLUE
AND YOUR CAKE DOESN'T EXPLODE IN GOO!

*blows noisemakers*

As a present, please accept this drawing of a dragon. It's a bit smudged because I'm impatient and I didn't wait for the lineart to dry.

In honor of your 20th birthday, I gift you #20 in the Pokédex: Raticate! But not just any boring old Raticate! Your gift is an Alolan Raticate! Part Dark-type, it is quite useful against any Psychic or Ghost-types that try to pester you!

My gift to you: hand-knitted urple mittens, with your initials worked in wilver on the backs. Mittens have never looked this terrible beautiful.

-Alleb

I remember these guys. :D

I think this is an idea the Flowers wouldn't go for in 2017, but 2003 - at the height of the Fanfic Explosion - I can see it. And if it all goes spectacularly wrong, they only lose, like, one agent, right? Win/win!

~

On an unrelated note: when did you actually join the PPC? 2003-dated people are pretty rare around here, even the ones who left for a while and then came back. Any idea what time of year you showed up?

(From my records, it looks like you were here in 2015 for a bit, 2010-2012 on and off, 2008 for a while, and... were you GreenCat3? I have a couple of records in 2004, though it's very patchy back then.)

hS

Short, simple story, but it was fun. You managed to squeeze a decent amount of scene setting into the SG-1 scene, considering how short it was. I'm also amused that in interacting with three separate characters, Kitty is always the manic one of the pair.

I can't wait to see how Doctor Fitzgerald and the rest of Medical reacts to Kitty continuously jamming more characters into the room . . .

—doctorlit, breakfasting

And can't wait for Boromir!

~Z, who needs to run off to class very soon

/rubs hands eagerly/ I look forward to finding out what happened/will happen to the other members, now!

Nice to meet you, I'm Twistey, an uberchaotic neutral lightly-used-bie. That's great that you came back, you seem like an interesting person. Here, as a returnbie gift, have a pen with feathers on the end that will act like a bird (but will let you write with it if you're good to it.) Nice to meet you! I'd love to see what you end up creating!

-Twistey

Please have a bag of black-hole chocolates.

I don't know what's the policy here for newbies making gifts (specially since you're not actually a newbie) so here are my intentions of giving you a gift. Hope you like them. Stay determined! I would love to read something yours someday.

I don't believe we met the first time you showed up. Tell me about your fandoms, niche interests, all-consuming passions...

Also, here's a pair of fuzzy blue socks, because why not!

Have a plate of fresh SPaGhetti!

Been writing fanfics again, Kuroko no Basuke have no shortage of interesting characters and powers. Here, have a Rule Breaker replica. Can't break rules with it, unfortunately.

Yeah, I was wondering if a PPCer could do stuff with their characters before getting permission if the characters aren't agents yet and aren't sporking. I needed the info because I'm in the middle of an over-text RP with an IRL friend in which I play an alternate version one of my pre-agents (and by alternate version I mean a version in which she doesn't even know that the PPC exists), to help me get a good first draft of her personality. A first draft. The RP has become incredibly weird, so I'm pretty sure she won't act as an agent like she does as a weirdly RP'd civilian.

Anyway, I'm bookmarking your MST so I can read it later and laugh with your characters at the badfic. MSTs are one of my favorite things in the world. Hooray!

-Twistey

An imaginary friend character! I'm actually planning to make an entire RC of all the talking animal imaginaries I had as a kid, though it will largely be a background joke, and not a proper spin-off.

. . . Yeah, not much to say content-wise, being an MST. Um, on to the typos I caught?

First, a couple general notes. The titles of canons in your author's note at the beginning should be italicized. (Or in this case, not italicized to set them apart from all the italicized text around them.)

Pauses in writing shown with a line instead of a comma should use a long dash rather than a hyphen:
"'S—okay, I’m out of affectionate nicknames, can we maybe stop this now?' The other girl—her name was Kitty—ran a hand through her messy hair. 'Also, people might be getting the wrong impression.'"
Sadly, U.S. keyboards don't actually have that as a key.
On the Board and other places that use html-based coding, you can make them by filling in the space with & mdash ; but without any spaces. On GDocs and Word docs, you have to go through the Insert --> Symbol rigmarole, or just copy-and-paste them.

Note that you don't need to change the hyphens in adjectival phrases, or other word phrases strung together into a single complex word; you're already using those correctly:
"'. . . while sporking fics that we found bad and-slash-or amusing . . .'"

"'I kinda wish we were Agents,' Kitty said . . ."
No need for that capital "A" there. As far as the PPC goes, "agent" only gets the capital "A" when it's a title in front of an agent's name; otherwise, it's just a common noun.

"'. . . he wasn’t happy the insubordination of his own nose . . .'"
You're missing a preposition between "happy" and "the."

—doctorlit also uses long dashes to sign his name, clearly

Draco is not smooth with the ladies. He is from the lineage of sandpapers, who married into the oldest and noblest families of sharkskin, whose legendary ancestors had been hailed as the best whetstones in the universe, and he had received solid gold medals for the Most Abrasive Stone Polisher of The Year. That is how 'smooth' he is.

I will comment some more later.

An Aunt's Love by Emma Lipardi (Reviews)

"Harry comes home from school and Petunia is upset at the change in her nephew. Petunia decides to do what she should have been doing all along. Dumbledore had better stay away. Petunia Dursley is upset. Warnings on profile."

Rated: Fiction M
English
Drama
Harry P.
Chapters: 73
Words: 362,981
Reviews: 15,017
Favs: 11,315
Follows: 10,949
Updated: Jan 1, 2016
Published: Dec 30, 2004
id: 2196609

This is a textbook case of a story that starts with an interesting premise but doesn't have a clear end goal. What starts as an interesting (if flawed) piece of writing from soon after OotP's publishing date turns into Harry Potter being a ninja thespian who gets adopted by Dracula. Also, his Muggle therapist used to be US Special Forces and pulls a gun on Cornelius Fudge. Yyyyyeah.

Also, check that review count. This is one of the most reviewed, if not the most reviewed, HP fics on the Pit. NBD. =]