So, I've been working on Carnage and Sesrik (My new Thin Man agent and Carnage's partner), and I was wondering if someone could look them over and see what needs improving. The links are here:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1XyYGa0wSYeU-KcM5Fttt9g2WrDaMCH5dILWcpq-aIi4
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1Kz1SFNZHiKhvcT3VyIiQTeC0rySxexbxCrSi-W8Wj4Y
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My Agents by
on 2015-08-11 16:00:00 UTC
Link to this
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Re: My Agents by
on 2015-08-12 15:25:00 UTC
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My main question with Carnage is not "Why a dragon?" or "Why a monster?", but "Why a kaijuu?" The vulnerability to cold in particular is extremely characteristic of a red dragon in D&D and related games. I feel like that should at least be referenced somewhere as an inspiration. Honestly, I'm not sure what the kaijuu elements add, except as a reference to his somewhat overly complex backstory. The other thing I find off-putting is the sheer length of his powers section - it's longer than both the personality and bio sections. I know dragons are dangerous, but it seems a little excessive. I don't think he needs pyrokinesis AND thermal manipulation AND fire-breathing. Finally, I don't really understand why he hated humans. Because they're greedy and bad for the environment? Because he wants to conquer the world and they're in his way? I know he's technically an ex-Stu, so sensible motivations might not always be a factor, but I'm concerned that might intrude on Sesrik's schtick.
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Additionally... by
on 2015-08-12 20:45:00 UTC
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A DND red dragon would work with the backstory - Carnage is supposed to be from a crossover with MLP:FiM, and the reason you get cool monsters showing up in that show all the time is that Hasbro owns the rights to the Monster Manual and similar. A red dragon just works better, and you also have more of the dynamic of old vs. new - which you can't do with kaiju for reasons I should hope are obvious. =]
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Thoughts and suggestions by
on 2015-08-12 04:19:00 UTC
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Now that I've had the time to look at your agent bios, both together and separately, I'll spend some time with both general thoughts and each of them. I'll preface this by saying that I have constructive intents here and I don't mean to be demeaning. (Of course, my own experience with such a disclaimer implies that some things about your bios don't sit well with me, but hey, that's what concrit's for. ^^;)
First off, Scapegrace is correct in that first-time agents don't have to be human. Looking at a lot of Permission prompts and starting missions my fellow Boarders have written, I believe the reason so many people go with human agents as a basic "starting kit" is that, as TV Tropes puts it, Most Writers are Human. This means people are much easier to write for us than non-humans are, because we relate to other people much easier than we would a bird made of knives, a nine-foot-tall insect, or for that matter, a fire-breathing dragon. We tend to see monsters as, well, things, and not characters, which is why so many horror movies nowadays don't leave a lasting impression. I think the scare could be greater if you can relate to the creature in some way. On a broader scale, unless you start with a species that's already subject to some degree of anthropomorphism, such as a Pokemon, a non-human agent is a greater challenge than a human one, but has the benefit in that you don't have to stick to tradition. It's just a matter of personal taste. I personally find that trying to write a World One agent who stumbled upon the PPC via a plot hole would be boring compared to, say, writing Falchion or Cupid, for example. (Also worth noting is that Darkotas sent in two non-human agents for Permission as well, a Gungan and a Warcraft ogre I believe.) It's harder to build a strong base for either of them than for a human, especially a World One agent with a simple tried-and-true formula, but I can say with confidence that it's not impossible by any stretch of the imagination.
With that being said, I had a look at each of your agents, and I feel that while they could use a little work - okay, a LOT of work - you seem to be off to a good start. I'm not familiar with XCOM, but I had a look at the Thin Men, and the first thing that came to mind was the Uncanny Valley. I'm reminded of the agents from The Matrix movies, but with disturbing proportions, acid breath, and so on. The biggest thing that threw me off with his bio, though, was the lack of a History section. Without it, I couldn't really picture how he ended up in the PPC in the first place, which is really important if you want to build up his backstory. Suggestions include either going with the old plot hole trick like with Falchion (albeit with a good explanation as to why the plot hole was there in the first place; just having it show up for no reason would sound like an ass-pull to the reader), being found by an agent group in a badfic as with Cupid or Backslash, or else escaping from a badfic like Lapis. You didn't indicate whether any of these was the case, which really bothered me when I first read the bio, because it made him look as though he only existed to support Carnage (whom I'll get to in a bit). Every agent has a story to tell, and Sesrik should too if you want him to pass as a solid character. Scape made a good point about the Thin Men being essentially living tools without emotion or honor, so exploring how that would mesh with the PPC and its mix of democracy and comedy would be an interesting path to take. Hey, if Chakkik can do it, perhaps Sesrik can too.
As for Carnage... I honestly have more problems with him personally, even though I get what you're trying to do and I can understand why. An agent that's essentially a shrunken-down kaiju would pose some interesting implications, especially regarding how he now lives among the people he once towered over and within the buildings he used to destroy.It doesn't help that I once thought of an Indominus rex replacement as an agent, but I digress.However, when I looked at his bio, I noticed that it was too long. By itself, it's not too bad in terms of verbosity - I myself went into quite a bit of detail with both of my starting agents - but what was really jarring for me was that Carnage's bio was too long relative to Sesrik's. This is the other reason for my sentiment that the latter came off as only being there to support the former. A massive part of the reason for this is that while his abilities are par for the course as far as kaiju are concerned (many of the ones I've created have just as many cool tricks), a human sized kaijin of sorts is a wholly different animal, quite literally so. Carnage could probably wipe half of HQ off the map if he lost his temper, and the bloodlust he has as a "weakness" does not help, especially because if he's going to be an assassin, he'd have to witness the deaths of every Sue he'll come across. (I had the same complaint about the bloodlust lobbied against me when I first introduced Rayner; I've since been sorting it out, but I must say that it just doesn't mesh well with how agents work.) Everything else is reasonable, though I would again agree with Scape's suggestion to make Carnage a Noble Demon of sorts. Kaiju were originally created by war and violence, so it would make sense to have Carnage be born from, well, carnage, and have to live with the consequences. In his case, since he's burned everything, he has nothing left to do, so it's only fair that he starts moving down from the top, taking a good long look at the smaller beings he once lorded over and starting to empathize with them. (As for the shrinking thing, don't worry about it too much - my second DIC mission involved the use of a Shrink Ray to deal with a giant Sonic replacement.)
With all that being said, I'd still give him far fewer powers than he has in this version of the bio. If the technology the PPC has can shrink him, getting rid of his more dangerous powers wouldn't be too much of a stretch. The only powers I'd give him would be his thick, possibly fireproof scales, to contrast with Sesrik's vulnerability (and even then make him vulnerable to certain things like cold), and his fire breath, because, well, he's a dragon. Among his weaknesses, I think the bloodlust has to go, unless you can write it sensibly into the PPC like I did with Rayner and that I highly doubt because, well, my poor pony boy has to take meds to suppress his condition. I will reiterate that a bloodthirsty predator does not an agent make.
As far as final thoughts go, my major piece of advice would be to think carefully about how your characters would work within the setting you're trying to put them in, as opposed to looking at them within a vacuum. This is a pretty common trap for Sues/Stus in general, and believe me, I myself was guilty of it plenty of times back in the day, as if that angry T. rex!Violet I had slain on my very first mission wasn't enough of an indicator. The PPC is not, however, a free-for-all, but a coherent and cohesive universe where everyone has their place, use, and limits. It's important to know in particular what your characters' limits are, and whether they fit the standards of the PPC and its community. I like where you're headed with your characters, but they need to have their capabilities and mentalities not only defined more clearly but also scaled down very much in order to gel with their peers. As it is, I'm not confident in either of these aspects for either of these agents, and until I see a lot more streamlining and tightening for them both, my hopes that they'll get a pass when you request Permission are uncomfortably slim.
Now, then, I wonder if I can get your e-mail? I'd be happy to discuss your agents further and serve as both a sounding board and a beta reader if you need one in the future. :)
-SS -
Email by
on 2015-08-12 13:35:00 UTC
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It's yetanotherweirdperson@gmail.com. Please don't ask why.
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Hm by
on 2015-08-11 22:15:00 UTC
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Well, first off: Agents that are murder-machines tend to be hard to pull off. It seems like these two are interested in killing Sues because of the killing part, not because of the crimes-against-canon part:
"as a former world conqueror, he views Sues as pathetic amateurs who try and fail to compensate for their lack of finesse with an arsenal of powers that they are incapable of properly using"
and
"Carnage views Sues as insults to nature itself-they’re a feeble attempt to “improve” their species, but only succeed in bringing out their worst qualities"
It seems like these two don't have much love for the canon, so why are they are in the PPC? Also, while murder-crazy Agents can show up and work - see Desdendelle's Amris - they need someone else to hold them back and be a counterpoint. But in this case it seems like these two'd just cause each other to be worse.
For another thing, it seems like you're focusing too much on what these guys can do, and not why they do it. Powers are often immaterial in missions, what with disguises and all, and personalities are much more crucial to good agents/
And finally - dark humor =/= talking about the worst ways to torture Sues. In fact, the actual in-universe PPC has rules against torture, for good reason! And agents who act like that tend to not be very fun to read. -
I have one question... by
on 2015-08-11 22:02:00 UTC
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And one question only. Why not use human (or near-human) agents?
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Reasons by
on 2015-08-22 15:14:00 UTC
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Besides the reasons that other PPCers have listed, there are four other reasons why I chose to make my agents the species that they are:
1. I wanted my agents to be firsts-just with their species, I've just created the PPC's first agents from both D&D and XCOM.
2. The badfics I've got my eye on involve a lot of powerful Sues and Stus: no less than eleven dragons; a kaiju; a Character Replacement of the Colossal Titan that turns into Crystalak; a colony of xenomorphs, including a replacement of Queen Chrysalis who's become half-xenomorph, a giant non-canonical xenomorph, and multiple Yautja; and an entire army of changelings led by Queen Chrysalis' "daughter"; some Stu with an Omnitrix and the ability to turn into an Indominus Rex; a legendary Primal Carnage badfic; and an Indominus Rex that somehow ends up in Equestria. To take these things down, I need heavy firepower.
3. Carnage has been sitting in my head for years, unquestionably a Gary Stu. It's about time I put him to work.
4. I run on Dwarf Fortress logic. More monster=more fun to me. -
Seconded. by
on 2015-08-11 22:15:00 UTC
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If these are your first agents, you'll have a lot more leeway and options within a story if you don't have to keep shaping things around the size or bestial nature of your agents. Remember that direct conflict with a Sue is maybe a few sentences at best, and aren't usually the reason people read a mission. You're going to need enough characterization to last pages upon pages of dialogue, taking charges, and potential interaction with other agents or canons. The Sue is not the direct threat that an agent fights; rather, the influence the Sue has on the canon around them is. And right now... I'm a bit worried your agents in their current state might add to that influence.
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I can answer that: theming. by
on 2015-08-11 22:12:00 UTC
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I think what Glarn's going for is a "he who fights monsters" kind of deal, with fantasy monsters of the old school represented by Carnage and newer aliens represented by Sesrik. It's an interesting jumping-off point, and I think if Carnage had more of a Noble Demon thing compared to Sesrik's win-at-all-costs sneakiness there's potential for a really awesome discussion of different cultures' notions of honour.
Also, and I speak only for myself: so what if people aren't using human agents? We're under no obligation to do so. Why is Amris a Culture drone and not merely a psychotic human? Why does the Librarian have to be a Time Lord when there are plenty of smug, asinine World One chaps knocking around? If you can get a good st -
Dammit, misclicked. by
on 2015-08-11 22:13:00 UTC
Link to this
I think what Glarn's going for is a "he who fights monsters" kind of deal, with fantasy monsters of the old school represented by Carnage and newer aliens represented by Sesrik. It's an interesting jumping-off point, and I think if Carnage had more of a Noble Demon thing compared to Sesrik's win-at-all-costs sneakiness there's potential for a really awesome discussion of different cultures' notions of honour.
Also, and I speak only for myself: so what if people aren't using human agents? We're under no obligation to do so. Why is Amris a Culture drone and not merely a psychotic human? Why does the Librarian have to be a Time Lord when there are plenty of smug, asinine World One chaps knocking around? If you can get a good story out of it, you can get a good story out of it. Simple as that, as far as I'm concerned. =] -
Well... by
on 2015-08-11 22:23:00 UTC
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The problem isn't non-human agents. It's non-human agents for the sake of powers, monstrosity, etc. The Librarian is a Time Lord because of his origin story and nothing more (though it really helps with his racism, so to speak - so many more reasons to belittle humans when you aren't one, etc). Amris is a Culture Drone because that's a different sort of character that has a different mindset and works in different ways.
Oh, and apropos Amris: can you guess who are the two major inspirations for him? -
That's exactly the point, though. by
on 2015-08-11 23:41:00 UTC
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A dragon on the one hand and an alien bioweapon on the other? They're very different mindsets that work in different ways, both from each other and from the reader.
If these were my agents - and I know they're not - I'd write Carnage as a kind of Noble Demon figure, a victorious general who, to (mis)quote Plutarch, "saw the breadth of his domains and wept, for there were no lands left to conquer". Evil, certainly, but with a strict personal code; unable to so much as countenance deviating from it. Honourable in all his dealings, just evil and with the muscle to back it up.
Sesrik, on the other hand, is rather different. Thin Men were clearly designed to be infiltrators; sneaks and assassins, carving up government figures, liaising with fifth-columnists like EXALT, and trying to break human resistance from the inside. They're tools. They don't feel emotion, because emotion clouds your perspective; they know no honour, because honour limits your options. They are an acid-vomiting, plasma-blasting, incomparably evil clone race; not because of any specific malice, but rather the will to dominate matched with a total indifference to the so-called "rules of war".
That'd be an interesting matchup to read about; the agent of aliens and the king of hell, thrust into the last war, the war that will claim them by degrees, the war where there are always more lands left to save. It'd be... possibly a little dark for the setting, but I think if Sesrik's arc was being introduced to a joke and shaking its hand, they could be a lot of fun.
But meh, I'm just spitballing. =] -
I'm not in this discussion, but I wanted to say... by
on 2015-08-12 13:55:00 UTC
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Your writing is beautiful.
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*blushu* (nm) by
on 2015-08-12 22:12:00 UTC
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Re: My Agents by
on 2015-08-11 21:56:00 UTC
Link to this
I'm not a PG, but I took a look at the profiles and I have some thoughts.
First things first: I'm a bit concerned you're focusing too much on the "coolness" factor of an agent as opposed to making an agent that is well-rounded. Looking at Carnage, for example, I'm seeing a LOT of things about all the cool things he can do and his combat capabilities, but not a lot about who he is. He seems to be focused around, well... just killing and fighting. That can work, but I'm not seeing enough characterization to compensate. Remember, he isn't going to be in his natural form most of the time, he'll be in disguise. Most of those abilities you listed will be moot.
Sesrik... is a good start. He's cold calculating, and a former malevolent alien. Okay, cool. But who is he? Why does he stay in the PPC? Having his entire reason be "he likes fighting Sues" won't really give you a lot of options for stories, IMO. Flesh him out as an individual first, and as an agent second. -
First thing: file access. by
on 2015-08-11 16:07:00 UTC
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You haven't given it. ^_^
Go to File > Share, hit 'Get Shareable Link', and then set whether you want us to be able to View or Comment.
hS - OK, got it. by on 2015-08-11 21:18:00 UTC Link to this
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Some points on Sesrik: by
on 2015-08-11 22:05:00 UTC
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1: "Department: Floaters"
Was he drawn to the DF because it's vaguely reminiscent of his airborne comrades-in-tentacles? I think you could make a joke out of that.
#2: "[...]firing at foes with his trusty plasma rifle, the typical weapon for his kind"
Thin Men in XCOM: EU use Light Plasma Rifles rather than Plasma Rifles; the former is really more of a carbine than anything else, which is why Long War replaced them with, er, Plasma Carbines. Thin Men with Plasma Rifles really does not bear thinking about. =]
#2a: Further to this, Thin Men are also incredibly strong - remember that they are extremely accurate with their LPMs and fire them like pistols, despite the fact that the incredibly burly Mutons need to use both. This is something I think worth commenting on, if only to further emphasise Sesrik's glass cannon nature.
#3: "He can also unhinge his jaws in a similar fashion to a snake"
It's funny that you use that comparison, since Thin Men were conceived as a replacement for Snakemen.
#4: "[His] poison breath only works on creatures with a functional respiratory system"
That's not the case. It's an acid attack; it works, for instance, on SHIVs, and the Chem Grenade (which uses bits of dead Thin Man in its construction) works on Mechtoids, Cyberdiscs, and similar cybernetic, non-breathing foes. I get that you're trying to balance it, but it's wrong, and you can find other ways to deal with it.
#5: "Having little experience with humor, Carnage’s snarks and remarks often sail right over his head"
Don't write Drax the Destroyer. One is plenty.
#6: There is no rule 6.
#7: "[...]he views Sues as pathetic amateurs who try and fail to compensate for their lack of finesse with an arsenal of powers that they are incapable of properly using."
I... am conflicted. While I like the idea of him finding the Sues' lack of finesse distasteful - it certainly fits with the Thin Men's role as infiltrators - I don't think any agent, however villainously inclined, should sympathise with what the Sues are trying to do, even in an "Aww, it's Babby's First Genocidal Conquest" way.
#8: "the sight of [...] an Ethereal sends him into a blind panic to get away as fast as he can, often requiring his larger partner to get him to calm down."
No. No, this is just flat-out wrong. That's like being scared to fits of paranoid terror of your line manager. The Ethereals are their bosses/brahmins/generals, depending on who you ask; they're not the devil. More likely, he'd have to be restrained from prostrating himself before them.
So, y'know, aside from all that, that's average. Can't comment on Carnage because I sort of very slightly don't care. =] -
You need to change the docs' permissions. (nm) by
on 2015-08-11 16:07:00 UTC
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New Mission! by
on 2015-08-11 20:56:00 UTC
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Rina and Zeb team up with Ari to take care of
An Overabundance of Snrfs. -
HQ is going to be overrun with POVs in a week, isn't it. (nm) by
on 2015-08-12 05:38:00 UTC
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I fail to see how this could be a problem. (nm) by
on 2015-08-12 22:30:00 UTC
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*SNRFSNRFSNRFSNRFSNRF* (nm) by
on 2015-08-12 22:33:00 UTC
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Snrf? by
on 2015-08-12 22:39:00 UTC
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Snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf snrf!
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It's a pov stampede! by
on 2015-08-12 22:56:00 UTC
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This makes me wonder what a Sue-pov looks like...
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Well, like a glittery pov, no? by
on 2015-08-12 23:17:00 UTC
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It probably goes, "Snrf~!"
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Or "sntd." by
on 2015-08-13 00:11:00 UTC
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Or maybe SNRF!1!!!!1!
Come to think of it, I think there's a Stu-pov in the mission I'm writing... considering that the Stu has a blak cutie mark, I bet it'll be blak and red and glittery. (There is literally a black-and red alicorn Sue. She probably has bat wings, though her description was vague enough it was unclear. As well as a red-black-and-blak 'stalion' Stu. Sounds like a recipe for an emo pov.) -
To the tune of "Crawling in my Skin": by
on 2015-08-13 01:04:00 UTC
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"SNRRRF SNRF-SNRRRRRF SNRF-SNRRRRRRF, SNRF SNRF, SNRF SNRF, SNRF SNRRR-RRRRRRF!"
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I'm gonna go see if POVs are on the wiki yet. :) (nm) by
on 2015-08-13 01:41:00 UTC
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Anime Sue-POV goes "Snrf-desu~" (nm) by
on 2015-08-13 00:03:00 UTC
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Nice job! by
on 2015-08-12 02:51:00 UTC
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My favorite part was the POV stampede and how those things were used to get rid of the Sue. That was fun! Also, I want a POV. Or else just a pov, since those take up less room. XD
Also, @firemagic, I was wondering if we could start on our co-write ASAP. I'm ready if you are now that I've reached that point in my agents' timeline. -
I have one! Sort of. by
on 2015-08-13 20:37:00 UTC
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*holds out squirming Continuity Cat* His name is Ciel POV; he's a mini rather than an actual POV since I didn't know POVs were separate creatures when I wrote my second mission. Take him if you want him.
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Incoming ICEP request! by
on 2015-08-11 22:45:00 UTC
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I SAW YOUR NEW FRIENDS
I WANT ONE
THAT'S A LIE
I WANT ALL OF THEM
THEY'RE SO FLUFFY!!!!!! =OD -
Very nice! by
on 2015-08-11 22:01:00 UTC
Link to this
I especially love what you did with the POVS. *snrf* I quite enjoyed the mission, and though I'm only familiar with Percy Jackson, I didn't feel totally lost all of the time. Two things, though.
“Hello, Chiron POV. “Wow. Does canon!Dionysus mess up names to that level, or is this just Flanderization? And Chiron rolling his eyes - that doesn’t seem quite in character for a centaur older than every modern civilization.”
Extra quotation mark.
“And how does Bianca’s soul show up on the map?” asked Theia, incredulity evident in each syllable
I thought for a moment that another agent had somehow come along and just escaped my notice up to that point, but she's not mentioned anywhere else. -
Fixed and fixed. by
on 2015-08-11 22:07:00 UTC
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Tera and Theia were in the original draft, and it looks like we missed cutting that out. ^^;
Glad you liked it! -
Fixed? by
on 2015-08-12 20:02:00 UTC
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Theia is still there.
Also, I suspect that there are other remnants of Tera and Theia having been in the original draft:
“Well, it was a pleasure to work with all of you,” Zeb said, now back in Luxray form.
“Likewise!” said Ari cheerfully. “And let us know if you need backup with magical girl fic, yeah?
HG -
Whoops! Thanks again. (nm) by
on 2015-08-12 21:17:00 UTC
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New Interlude! by
on 2015-08-12 01:00:00 UTC
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Des gets a surprise visitor. Gems, tea, and origin stories ensue in:
Well, I Was In The Neighbourhood -
Poor Pinfire! by
on 2015-08-12 02:55:00 UTC
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Being mistaken for a Sue is a terrible fate indeed. I don't really know Steven Universe, but she seems like an interesting character and I'd like to see more of her though.
If I had one suggestion, I'd like more descriptions of Pinfire. SU has some interesting character designs, and I'm curious what she looks like. -
Ask and ye shall recieve by
on 2015-08-12 03:05:00 UTC
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Here's Pinfire's current form:
http://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/ppc/images/7/70/BOpal.png/revision/latest?cb=20150812001047
And here's Pinfire's Gem (well, basically. Her real Gem is more like the one in the upper photo, but this one's patterns are perfect so.)
http://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/ppc/images/e/e1/Pinfire_Opal.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20150812000724 -
Cool, thanks! (nm) by
on 2015-08-12 04:24:00 UTC
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Hello from Canadia! by
on 2015-08-12 02:32:00 UTC
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I am in Canada for a week roughly, specifically Montreal, that wonderful, wonderful place of dirtyness, smokers, and zoos. And inexplicable shopping centers under cathedrals. And everyone jabbering away in French that I can't understand except for "cushion" and "small cheesecake with salted caramel and something or other."
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Re: Hello from Canadia! by
on 2015-08-13 20:03:00 UTC
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Don't forget the poutine.
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Come to think of it, Montreal? by
on 2015-08-13 20:56:00 UTC
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Don't forget to try the bagels at St. Viateur! They're fantastic. Also, go see Old Quebec City if you can--it's beautiful (and roughly in the area). I also hear there are botanical gardens in Montreal--I didn't get to them when my friend and I were there, but I expect they're quite nice.
~DF -
I got all excited when you said Canada! by
on 2015-08-12 05:09:00 UTC
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I don't live there myself, but one of my best friends lives in Alberta. Have fun in Montreal, though!
(How do you prefer to be addressed, by the way? Orange? Yoshi? OrangeYoshi99?) -
If it's q shortening of my username it's fine. by
on 2015-08-12 19:22:00 UTC
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Additionally, you may call me "that there guy who misspells things"
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Party Time? Plugging Time! by
on 2015-08-12 08:00:00 UTC
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Since I joined the PPC two years ago,
- I talked on the Board
- I played with bad ideas in the badfic games
- I began building my agents in writing exercises
- I edited the Wiki
- I beta read (not as often as I should)
- I was shipped in the Shipfic Fest
- I worked on the "Lost Tales" archive
- I tried role-playing in Plort (and nearly talked my alter ego’s head off)
Guess what I never did?- Chat on the IRC? No, that’s not what I meant. I’m still waiting for the big Ypur feast in La Wunj.
- Ask for Permission? It’s on my schedule, but it’s further down than "Retire from my job", and this may still take some time.
- Sign the Constitution? Now that you remind me... procrastinate, procrastinate. Isn’t it sufficient that I signed the last two amendments? I may still need something to do for next years celebration...
I actually never wrote fanfiction. Of course I had to give it a try. Here it is, and concrit is welcome.
Continuum: Harry Potter.
Rating: Mostly harmless (if you could read Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, you can read this).
Category: Drama? Angst? Fill-the-plothole? I don’t know. Tell me what it is.
Yes, that’s my way of celebrating two years on the Board; I’m terribly bad at throwing parties.
HG - I talked on the Board
-
Nice try, non-Agent Hieronymus by
on 2015-08-15 14:39:00 UTC
Link to this
But you may want to reconsider all the Death Eater’s spells registering on the Trace. Remember that Wormtail and Voldemort got away with casting Unforgivables in Harry’s presence on Little Hangleton’s graveyard in GOF. Apparently distance matters.
The Snowdrop, Head of Department, Uncanonical Department of Inaccuracies
-------------------
I did remember, and I theorized that they always kept enough distance from Harry, but I didn’t check until now. And now I may have caught JKR making a mistake, in GOF chapter 32:
It [the hooded figure who was Peter Pettigrew] stopped beside a towering marble headstone, only six feet from them [Cedric and Harry].
And yet, when Wormtail casted an unforgivable killing curse so close to Harry, no Aurors apparated to the graveyard to arrest the murderer? How did this not register on the Trace?
On the next page, Wormtail dragged Harry to the marble headstone on Tom Riddles grave and conjured tight cords around Harry, tying him from head to ankles to the headstone.
Well, using this spell near a kid on a graveyard may not be sufficiently suspicious to justify an immediate investigation.
Cedric’s body was lying some twenty feet away.
How did he move? Last page, he was six feet away from the marble headstone, lying spread-eagled on the ground beside [Harry].
So I’m not sure whether six feet or twenty feet from the nearest kid is sufficiently far away to escape being traced.
Anyway, the trio was near the other end of the time room – which is not small – when a Death Eater opened the door. This Alohomora should not be on the Trace’s report.
Also, Bellatrix and the other Death Eaters trying to stun Harry’s friends across the round room with twelve doors were probably too far away to be detected by the Trace.
But I believe that everything else is either sufficiently vague or justifiable.
And sorry for breaking the bad news to Ixi and Matt – apparently I’m the biggest Harry Potter nerd around.
HG -
It's also entirely possible... by
on 2015-08-15 15:26:00 UTC
Link to this
That Voldefetus had set up wards around the graveyard so the Trace wouldn't be set off.
I mean, remember how the Order of the Phoenix used magic around Harry to get him out of Privet Drive and to Grimmauld Place, and there was no stink raised about that?
I'm guessing it's more just inconsistency on JKR's part.
Also, you really wanna go there again? -
A wizard did it? by
on 2015-08-16 09:03:00 UTC
Link to this
Sorry, this sounds too much like a hand-wavy "everything’s possible with magic", when the books clearly show that this isn’t true.
If you could point me to a hint that the trace can be fooled by powerful wizards, or that Dumbledore side-by-side-apparating with Harry could not be traced, or if characters in DH had talked about how easy it would be to get Harry out of 4PD again if Dumbledore were still there and jammed the Trace, then I would buy "Babymort set up wards around the graveyard" as JKR’s explanation.
But apparently only him being able to do this, when he wasn’t even on the height of his power, without any foreshadowing (or aftershadowing)? That’s not how JKR works.
On the other hand, the Trace obviously doesn’t trace everything, so there must be a maximal distance up to which magic performed in the vicinity of kids can be detected, and it should be possible to figure it out.
HG -
Oh, another thing. by
on 2015-08-15 15:32:00 UTC
Link to this
Tom Riddle used underage magic to kill his Muggle relatives, and yet the Ministry blamed Morfin Gaunt for the murders. Apparently there was no Trace activated from the use of Unforgivables by an underage student.
No book is without its plotholes. Methinks you're just reading too much into this.
Biggest Harry Potter Fan out. -
No, no, no! by
on 2015-08-15 16:51:00 UTC
Link to this
This is one of the reasons why I assumed that the Trace doesn’t tell names. In CS, Mafalda Hopkirk didn’t know that the Hover Charm had been performed by Dobby. But the Trace may still have reported something like
Hover charm performed near Harry Potter at number four, Privet Drive, Little Whinging.
When Tom Riddle and his parents had been killed, nobody bothered to look for the – probably traumatized – under-aged witness who must have triggered the Trace. They had a suspect, and Morfin Gaunt confessed immediately, so they didn’t need the witness’s testimony.
I don’t like to imagine that they didn’t care although they knew the "witness’s" name and could guess that he was related to the victims, not just a passer-by. But even if the Trace reported
Three UNFORGIVABLE KILLING CURSES performed near Tom Marvolo Riddle at the Riddle House, Little Hangleton
nobody would have suspected that the supposed witness had actually been the murderer.
Concerning the Order of the Phoenix getting Harry out of Privet Drive to Grimauld Place, the Advance Guard had to wait for a specific time, four days after the Dementors’ attack. It seems quite obvious to me that, at this time, a member or associate of the Order was on duty at the Trace, determined to ignore any reports from Little Whinging (and possibly to destroy the printed evidence).
HG -
I loved the uniqueness and creativity. by
on 2015-08-12 15:19:00 UTC
Link to this
It was quite a fun read. Quick question: What format is used for the spell listings?
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IÂ’m glad that you liked it by
on 2015-08-12 15:58:00 UTC
Link to this
The format for the Trace’s output is <span style="font-family: Courier New;">Trace output text</span>.
HG -
*applause* by
on 2015-08-12 14:12:00 UTC
Link to this
Very well-written! I loved the way you used the increasing lethality of the spells to highlight the growing tension. (Yes, I knew vaguely what was going to happen, but I still went OH S**T when the first Unforgivable got fired.
The idea of the Trace being connected to a physical item that lists underage spells and their location was a neat idea, and I loved the fact that it just straight-up exploded at the end.
BUT! I did notice one typo.
This early in the morning, most of the addressees would still be asleep, and half of them would probably not hear Dawlish's voice, but whoever got the massage would try to fetch others, and after a short period of chaos a counter-attack would be launched.
Massage should be message. ;) -
Thank you! by
on 2015-08-12 16:18:00 UTC
Link to this
The typo is corrected.
You are aware that the Trace doesn’t simply "list underage spells"? (I could write an essay about the assumptions I made, and their plausibility, and it would probably be longer than the ficlet.)
HG
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New Interlude! by
on 2015-08-12 14:10:00 UTC
Link to this
Is it just me, or have there been more stories posted than usual recently? I'm sure I'm not used to seeing so many Missions and Interludes out all at once :)
So, the inspiration for this piece came from a conversation a couple of weeks ago which suggested that the PPC using autonomous attach drones wouldn't make for an entertaining story. But we've previously had several conversations along the lines of making workable stories out of 'bad' ideas.
Hopefully, I am now able to offer further proof that there really is no such thing as a bad idea.
For reference, this takes place a little later on in my spin-off, when Skeet and Amy are fairly used to working with each.
- Irish -
^_^ (nm) by
on 2015-08-12 15:53:00 UTC
Link to this
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:) (nm) by
on 2015-08-15 23:57:00 UTC
Link to this
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And that is why you don't create a killer you can't control. by
on 2015-08-12 15:20:00 UTC
Link to this
I agree, it definitely sounded like HK-47.
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Well, technically speaking... by
on 2015-08-15 23:57:00 UTC
Link to this
The killer that Skeet created was under his control. It's just when it gained sentience that things got a little awkward.
As I explained to Des, the sounding like HK-47 thing was unintentional, although the things that I was meaning for it to sound like do sound very similar to HK-47. So I guess it still sort of works.
- Irish -
I must admit... by
on 2015-08-12 15:13:00 UTC
Link to this
I chuckled. (There goes my Stoic reputation. :P) Well-written, dood. I particularly liked the HK-47 reference.
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Glad you liked it. by
on 2015-08-15 23:47:00 UTC
Link to this
That wasn't actually meant to be an HK-47 reference - it was supposed to be a reference to Schlock Mercenary (the continuum that the mission ostensibly took place in). A.I.s in that 'verse have a tendency to refer to organics as 'meat'.
Even the friendly ones use terms like 'meat-glacier' when referring to how slowly organic intelligences think and act compared to them.
Having said that, I'm not sure that the specific term 'meatbag' actually appears anywhere in the comic, and I've now remembered that HK-47 says it a lot. So, entirely unintentional on my part.
Still, glad I was able to make you chuckle. That was the intention, after all :)
- Irish -
Ix reacts? Sure, why not. (spoilers) by
on 2015-08-12 14:41:00 UTC
Link to this
Technically, it did open a portal, but instead of the usual doorway-style opening, the portal was a circle just under a metre in diameter, at about head height.
I can see where this is going and I love it already.
“Hmm, well, I see two realistic options. One, we rig up some kind of slide…” Skeet gestured at the hole in the wall, “... aimed at the portal. If we tuck our arms and legs in like we’re on a water flume, we should get through without any splinching.”
ACTUALLY, I WOULD LOVE TO SEE THIS.
“Amy, are you going to let me build a killer robot, or are you going to insist on being the voice of reason?”
Priceless. I gigglesnorted.
Amy rarely went into Skeet’s room, because (she claimed) it smells like boys’ feet.
Can confirm, my brother's a teenage boy and it smells like feet in his room.
“Droidsy! You came back!”
“You named it ‘Droidsy’?”
Can I say just how much I love this? Because I do. *huggles Droidsy*
“You can talk?”
::Statement – Duh::
“And you know sarcasm. Well, isn’t that just great.”
Sarcastic droid OMG
The drone swivelled to look at Skeet, who suddenly became aware of the fact that this meant it was also pointing its weapon at him.
OH NOES
::Query – What factor could be more important than efficiency?::
OI, DEPARTMENT OF EFFICIENCY! GOT YOU A NEW RECRUIT!
Droidsy tipped slightly to one side, either as the result of damage to its propulsion system or mimicking human behaviour while thinking about its creator’s point. Meanwhile, Skeet’s aimless wandering had just so happened to take him up to his weapons cabinet.
Very nice. Very nice indeed. :D
“Query-” Skeet realised that he was copying the droid’s speech patterns. “I mean… out of interest, when I built you, did I include an off switch?”
Department of Efficiency, sorry about that, you can go home now.
Basically, I liked this. A lot.
-
Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it. by
on 2015-08-15 23:31:00 UTC
Link to this
Skeet would like to point out that his room doesn't smell any different from the rest of the RC.
Amy would like to point out that Skeet is clearly lying, and thank you for backing her up.
Your comment about wanting to see agents sliding in through the portal got me to wondering if there any times that would be particularly appropriate. The results of some very silly thoughts are presented here:
* * *
Amy walked back in to her RC to see Skeet glaring at the console as if it had just insulted his mother. "What's up?"
Skeet gestured at the console screen. "Oh, just someone trying to ruin another happy memory from my childhood."
Amy frowned to herself, wishing that her partner would be a little more consistent with his facial expressions. "What canon?"
"Thunderbirds," Skeet said. "You ever watch it?"
Amy shrugged. "A little."
"Well, I watched it a lot. And the others, like Stingray and Captain Scarlet. And the recent reboot isn't bad, but this..." Skeet gestured at the console again. "This just doesn't sound good. Grab us each a pistol, would you?"
Amy fetch a pair of weapons, while Skeet pressed buttons seemingly at random.
Amy was waiting by the wall when Skeet pressed the final button, which usually resulted in a portal for them to walk through. On this occasion, however, Amy was left staring at a blank wall.
"Um, Skeet, I think our portal generator might be broken again."
"What? Oh, no, you don't think we'd start a Thunderbirds mission by just walking through a hole in the wall, do you?" Skeet was on the other side of the RC, near the bookshelves.
He reached out and grabbed one of the books, 'Secret Rooms and Hidden Passages: An Observer's Guide', and tipped it back slightly.
The bookshelf began sinking into the floor, revealing a hidden compartment behind it.
[5]
"Argh!" Amy jumped back in surprise, loosing her balance. "Was that the console?"
"Yup." Skeet grinned. "I added a little to the programming."
[4]
Amy picked herself up and joined her partner by the bookcase, just as it slid out view entirely.
The small alcove that had been revealed contained a pair of harnesses, that looked sort of like the safety harnesses for a rollercoaster.
[3]
Skeet took the right one, and Amy took the left. Once they were both in position, the harnesses clamped down on their shoulders.
[2]
The floor and wall jerked slightly, then the whole assembly moved up and over, tipping the agents so that they were lying on their backs, head first pointing down a slope. At the bottom of the slope was the telltale blue glow of a portal.
"Waaaah!"
"Relax, Amy, you've got nothing to worry about."
"Oh yeah? Then next time we get tipped upside down, you can wear a skirt!"
[1]
Skeet looked across at his partner, as she tried to preserve her modesty. "Riiiight, sorry about that."
[Thunderbirds are go!]
Amy glared at Skeet, and was just about to reply when the clamps released, and they were both sent hurtling down the slide.
A/N: I take no responsibility for this whatsoever. Thunderbirds was created by Gerry and Sylvia Anderson. -
Squee. ^_^ (nm) by
on 2015-08-16 13:48:00 UTC
Link to this
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[3, 2, 1 – Love it!] (nm) by
on 2015-08-16 09:16:00 UTC
Link to this
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Badfic authors? by
on 2015-08-12 18:23:00 UTC
Link to this
Have the authors of badfics themselves ever been encountered during a mission?
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Two encounters I can remember... by
on 2015-08-12 18:40:00 UTC
Link to this
One was when Rina and Randa tackled Rina's badfic, so I think it counts?
The other time was when a Stu - Spidey3000 - was destroyed by his own author. -
That is not how the PPC works. by
on 2015-08-12 18:38:00 UTC
Link to this
What you are asking is 'Have PPC writers ever written parodies of real live fanfiction authors for their agents to abuse?'.
That really, really isn't what we do.
hS -
Re: That is not how the PPC works. by
on 2015-08-12 18:59:00 UTC
Link to this
Sorry, I was just being curious.
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Was it really the meaning? by
on 2015-08-12 18:41:00 UTC
Link to this
Because I didn't get that feeling, hS.
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It's... hard to imagine otherwise. by
on 2015-08-12 18:46:00 UTC
Link to this
The authors of badfics do not, in general, like the fact that the PPC kills their stories. Excepting the cases where the badfic was written by a PPCer... how do you expect an author to be encountered in a story which was written without their consent or knowledge, and not be written as a parody of a real person?
hS -
You... may have a point there... (nm) by
on 2015-08-12 18:52:00 UTC
Link to this
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The Reader held her even more tightly... by
on 2015-08-12 22:01:00 UTC
Link to this
...leaning her own head on Naya's shoulder. "I'll always watch your back," she said. Her voice was soft, meant for Naya's ears alone, futile as that probably was. "I--" She hesitated. "I don't quite have the words for this. But I can't lose you. And I like you a lot as well. And I don't--I feel far too lucky that you're even my friend, let alone anything else. You should...you should think about this, Naya." She pressed a kiss to the quarian's shoulder, unwilling to stop herself, not when she could barely keep from trembling. She had nearly lost Naya. "I'm not...not exactly the best choice of romantic partner out there. I--well. You know me. I hardly lack emotions, especially for you, but...I'm perhaps not the healthiest person you could attach yourself to. You should..." She took a breath, forced the words to come out calmly. "You should really think this through. If--if you want there to be a 'this', that is."
-
"Reader..." Naya whispered. by
on 2015-08-13 00:50:00 UTC
Link to this
"Don't say things like that. You're not... just... it's like..." The disguised quarian sighed. "Screw it. I'm not good at big speeches like Emiran over there and I don't have Terabyte's ability to find the right quip for everything so I'm going to give it to you straight up: I don't care. Call me irrational, accuse me of being rash, tell me you're not worth it: I don't care. I like you. If you wanna hang around me and I wanna hang around you, I don't see what the big issue is."
The Guardsman, who had moved back to a squatting position, leaned towards Terabyte. "Eloquent. I like it," he whispered to his partner. "Although, I would've said--"
He never finished his sentence: Naya had whipped around and had tackled him to the ground, grabbing a double fistful of his shirt in the process. "NOYANCE, SHUT THE HELL UP!" she bellowed, shaking him around like a rag doll. "I'M TRYING TO CONFESS HERE!" -
"Naya. Naya!" by
on 2015-08-13 01:25:00 UTC
Link to this
The Reader pulled Naya off the Guardsman, turning her until they faced each other. "Leave him alone and listen to me for a minute." She took a breath, slid her hands up Naya's arms until they rested on the disguised quarian's shoulders, and continued. "I won't say you're being rash, I won't call you irrational, and I certainly wouldn't dare to contradict you about worth. I like you too, a lot. I want to be with you in any way that's possible. I just don't want you to ever decide you've made a mistake, especially not if you would have realized it ahead of time if you'd only stopped to reflect for a bit. That's all. That's all it is. I just want you to be sure, and maybe to help me figure out where we stand, but--"
-
"Reader, listen to me." by
on 2015-08-13 02:27:00 UTC
Link to this
Naya cradled the Time lady's face with her hands. "D'you think I haven't thought about this already? I've been mulling over this for a long time, you know. The more I think about it, the more I'm sure of my decision. Now stop worrying, you fussbudget. Don't ruin the moment," she said, smiling.
-
The Reader's smile was slow to start, but it grew quickly. by
on 2015-08-13 02:55:00 UTC
Link to this
"You've been thinking about this? For a while, now?" She tilted her head to one side, leaning on one of Naya's hands and ignoring the way her wet hair stuck to her back and shoulders instead of moving with her. Her smile was fond. "Though, as for the moment...I've been thinking about us for a while myself. And..." She paused, turning to press a kiss against Naya's palm. "I'm glad you're sure. Really, really, really glad." She grinned at the quarian, a hint of cheekiness creeping in. "Is this the part where we kiss? Because you're holding my face, and we're standing pretty near each other, and I'd really like to kiss you now, if you think it wouldn't ruin the moment." She tapped her fingers lightly against Naya's shoulders for emphasis.
-
"Well, if you think so..." said Naya, leaning in. by
on 2015-08-13 03:30:00 UTC
Link to this
"I concur with Naya. It wouldn't ruin the moment at all," said Terabyte.
"It's a bit cliché, though," said the Guardsman, picking himself off the ground. "You know: the near-death experience, the confession of love, the kiss on the beach. The works."
"Agreed. This scenario has many similarities to action-romance or romantic comedy shows.
"Pheh. Rom-coms. Totally not my cup of tea," said the Guardsman. "Action-romance isn't so bad if there's way more action than romance. Explosions are more fun to watch."
Meanwhile, Naya fumed silently in the Reader's hands. "Urge... to kill... rising..." she hissed, closing her eyes and trying to breathe through her nose. -
The Reader glanced over at Naya's partners, and then shook.. by
on 2015-08-13 03:55:00 UTC
Link to this
...her head. "We're keeping the moment," she told Naya, running one hand up until it cupped the quarian's face. She waited for the DIA agent's eyes to open again before she smiled. "Wouldn't be the same without them, you know," she said conversationally. "Right?"
Not waiting for a response--and, more importantly, not waiting for the Guardsman and Terabyte to speak up again--she leaned forward and pressed her lips against Naya's. Her eyes blinked shut.
This was their moment. Partners by the side, mortal danger, and a good deal of sand. And it was their moment.
The Reader shifted closer, wrapping her free arm around Naya's waist, and smiled into the kiss.
Perfection. -
"Oh, there we go." by
on 2015-08-13 04:40:00 UTC
Link to this
"The infamous beach kiss," said the Guardsman. "It looks different than in the movies."
"That is probably because of all the sand and grit," remarked Terabyte. "It certainly is a departure from the sanitized image of the beach."
"Yep." The Guardsman watched Naya and the Reader kiss. "I never understood why kissing is a thing. D'you know how many germs there are in your mouth? And you're sharing them with your partner! That's... weird."
"Not to mention throwing caution out of the window. Quarians are not normally supposed to be in contact with this many germs in such a short period of time."
"Remind me to remind her that a full disinfection needs to be performed on her when we come back," said the Guardsman. "All of that grit and... spit cold be a biohazard."
"Acknowledged," said Terabyte, nodding.
"Damn, how long can you go on kissing for?"
-
Advice on Writing A Mystery Story Needed by
on 2015-08-13 02:37:00 UTC
Link to this
I really do need advice, because I've found that I'm not too good at being subtle with my writing. But the problem is, I want to write a Doctor Who fanfiction, and as fans know, most of them involve a puzzle of sorts, and…yeah. Any advice would be good. Any DW fanfiction ideas in general would be good as well.
Ixi suggested the much-used plot of aliens attacking Earth, which I could go with, but I cannot think of a good reason why they would be attacking Earth. I know it depends on the type of baddie, but still… It still involves a puzzle. -
Well, aliens could... by
on 2015-08-13 04:25:00 UTC
Link to this
...want some sort of human art, and want humans to make it for them. This has a mystery of "why are all these artists disappearing?" (A fairly standard plot, but worth mentioning.)
...think that Earth is a great place to drop their nice little oxy/nitrogen breather nature preserve, which turns out to be an invasive species.
...think that Earth is a great place to dump their *garbage,* which requires an Earthlike atmosphere for some reason -- some sort of biomechanical garbage that falls asleep when exposed to oxygen?
...want something a different invasion (possibly by their enemies) left on Earth? -
Well, expanding on what I said in the email... by
on 2015-08-13 03:34:00 UTC
Link to this
Yeah, 'X species attacks/invades Earth' is pretty much the bread-and-butter of lots of Doctor Who plots. These can, however, be broken down into a few broad categories:
1. They want to wipe out humanity for TEH EVULZ.
2. They want to use the Earth as a resource for something, and humans are just getting in the way.
3. They want to use the humans as the resources.
4. They just happened to crash-land and ended up getting stranded, and humans mistook it for an invasion.
5. They don't possess the intelligence necessary to realize that what they're doing is wrong, and attack people simply because it's their instinct to find food.
And a puzzle can be anything, from hacking into a computer to figuring out the aliens' motive(s). Puzzles aren't confined to just riddles and physical interlocking pieces, after all. :) -
Advice! by
on 2015-08-13 03:14:00 UTC
Link to this
So first, you don't wanna make anything too complex, or try to write the next Sherlock Holmes, especially if it's your first time. And maybe the aliens are invading because they need to take a dump and their toilets are broken. I dunno, I don't watch Doctor who.
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Well, I did have an idea about the awswang... by
on 2015-08-13 03:25:00 UTC
Link to this
They're mythical monsters, a myth that came from the Phillipenes, but does that mean they'd have to be in the Phillipenes?
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*Philippines by
on 2015-08-13 03:29:00 UTC
Link to this
And, uh, no clue. In Supernatural the monsters certainly move around, but there's generally a reason for it, generally something to do with modernization. However, these awswang...would probably not be aliens? Unless they inspired the myths? Myth inspiration sounds rather DW-ish. I don't know anything about the monsters themselves, of course, but you'd need to find a reason for them to have appeared in the first place, a reason why they didn't stick around, and a reason why they're back.
~DF
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Myslef? by
on 2015-08-13 17:52:00 UTC
Link to this
Has anyone run into "myslef" before? Because I'm stuck as to how that typo should manifest.
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Re: Myslef? by
on 2015-08-13 20:07:00 UTC
Link to this
Minis can form from misspellings of words that aren't names?
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Sounds like a mini-Word to me. by
on 2015-08-13 18:55:00 UTC
Link to this
Kind of shifty-looking, ain't he? He can keep company with such notables as Broader and Wehr.
Of course, every time I suggest this I get told that mini-Words don't exist, which means what you probably end up with is a strange creature called a 'slef'. Which is apparently the Icelandic word for 'drool'. :D
hS -
Drool, eh? by
on 2015-08-14 15:34:00 UTC
Link to this
That's got potential.
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Kindly cease your conspiracy theorising by
on 2015-08-14 08:55:00 UTC
Link to this
Agent Huinesoron, you surely know better than to spread such rumours. We don't want to cause panic amongst our Agents.
The Uncommon Comma wishes me to remind you that if any such entity as a "mini-Word" existed, his department would surely have a verified sighting in its records. None such exists.
Consider this your last warning: if you bring this matter up again, the Weeds will be called. -
Sen sen sen? Seeeeen! by
on 2015-08-14 09:50:00 UTC
Link to this
Seeeeeeeeeeeen!
((Because of course they talk like Pokemon. Of course they do.))
Ell... eths?
Aar-aar-aaragogs! Aar!
Broooooooader!
Aaragogs!
((The best part is that sen came THIS CLOSE to actually appearing in an Agent hS mission...))
hS -
I'm afraid I had to. ^_^ by
on 2015-08-14 16:51:00 UTC
Link to this
The elvishes are watching, of course; I think Sen has popcorn.
Aaragog is not featured, presumably he's off weaving a web somewhere.
(And of course Wehr's hoard is gold letters - what else would it be?)
hS
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New mission! by
on 2015-08-13 18:47:00 UTC
Link to this
Rina and Zeb get a new mission, but the Sue's not the only one whose glitter levels are spiking...
(Doctor Who) -
Good work! by
on 2015-08-13 20:20:00 UTC
Link to this
...Is it bad that Rina's starting to scare me a little now? Cause she is. I hope she gets some help soon. (The joke about Rina's guinea pig was great, by the way, well done.)
Some things I noticed:
“...hiding from the Silence on the streets of New York.” Rina recited.
That period after "New York" should be a comma.
“No, seriously, who the flying ...nuggets is Victoria?”
According to Wikipedia, Victoria (Waterfield) was a companion during the Second Doctor era. She first appears in "The Evil of the Daleks," where her scientist dad's time travel experiments attracted Dalek notice. What I don't understand is how a Suethor knows about Susan (who actually was the Doctor's granddaughter) but not about any other Classic Who companions. *shrugs*
His partner’s behavior was just going to have to wait.
Abrupt ending is abrupt. I assume there's a part two forthcoming? -
Thank you! by
on 2015-08-13 20:25:00 UTC
Link to this
1) That was reciting the badfic, and it ended on a period. Thus the full stop.
2) I knew that, but the fact that the Doctor was referring to her as his granddaughter made me 'wat'. I'll probably change that to make it clearer.
3) Part two? Well, if you count Little Miss Mary in five days, then yes. There is a part two. -
On point one... by
on 2015-08-13 20:40:00 UTC
Link to this
It's acceptable to change periods to commas and vice-versa for the sake of grammar, at least in the Chicago style. Alternatively, you could set the quote in normal-weight font and surround it with single quotes, then place the comma outside the single quotes but still within the double-quotes for Rina's speech.
~Neshomeh -
Took option two. Thanks. (nm) by
on 2015-08-13 20:49:00 UTC
Link to this
-
You still don't need the period, though. by
on 2015-08-13 20:53:00 UTC
Link to this
Sorry, that wasn't clear.
Don't need the bolding, either—unless it was bolded in the source, I guess.
~Neshomeh -
Well done! by
on 2015-08-13 19:46:00 UTC
Link to this
Can't wait to read more, though. Rina is being scary. Very, very scary.
-
Oh dear, oh dear. (Spoilers!) by
on 2015-08-13 19:28:00 UTC
Link to this
Rina... dood... take a chill pill. In fact, take ten of them. o.o
Rina: I WOULD, but I'm FRELLING ALLERGIC, argleblargle@#$%!@#$%
Oh... okay... right... sorry. I'll just. Um. >.> *sidles away*
For what it's worth, I don't think she's going particularly glittery here. The TARDIS-flying is perfectly well justified, IMO. As for the premature killing, that's less glittery, more flamethrower-y.
... Five days until LMM, eh?
~Neshomeh -
Five more days. by
on 2015-08-13 20:29:00 UTC
Link to this
And yeah, Rina's one ridiculously bad badfic away from losing it...
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Foreshadowing.... (nm) by
on 2015-08-13 20:32:00 UTC
Link to this
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Okay then... Cipher Reacts? :) by
on 2015-08-13 19:20:00 UTC
Link to this
"Zeb beamed. “See? I’m learning.”"
Good boy, Zebbie! Have a poffin! :3
"Rina eyeballed Zeb for a moment. “You humans?” she said finally."
Rina's starting to experience Time Lord superiority? 0.0
And of course grandchildren. Susan and Victoria.
Imsorrywhatnow!? o.o
.
.
.
Yaaay~ TARDIS helping! ^^
.
.
.
.
Rina did it! Rina did it! Foreshadowing the Aviator!
.
.
.
.
Imsorrywhatnow!? o.o A Gatekeeper!?
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Rina... what are you doing...
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Rina... STAHP!
Aaaaand BOOM goes the dynamite! She's slowly loosing it! Major cuckoo clock! :D
-
Badfics from one author? by
on 2015-08-13 19:06:00 UTC
Link to this
What is the largest number of badfics written by one author that were done on missions (like the Rose Potter hexology)? Are there any authors for which ALL of their badfics have been done?
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If this counts as a question post... by
on 2015-08-13 22:38:00 UTC
Link to this
I've had one rattling around my skull.
What would happen if the Ironic Overpower started shipping agents?
- Alleb -
Awkward Harem Anime Antics by
on 2015-08-14 00:58:00 UTC
Link to this
Agents walking in on each other at the wrong time, tripping and landing on top of each other, that kind of thing. Kind of like what happens with Valon and Kala, to be honest.
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...I do not know precisely, but now I'm curious. by
on 2015-08-13 23:51:00 UTC
Link to this
Likely you'd get a whole lot of situations where the agents suddenly found themselves in romantic situations...and started going 'what is this what is happening get off me'.
Could be interesting.
~DF -
Um, N. Harmonik. by
on 2015-08-13 19:46:00 UTC
Link to this
I appreciate that you've got lots of questions, but... could you maybe save them up and ask them all at once? You've got three threads on the front page right now, all of which consist solely of one question.
On a related note: could you maybe interact with threads other than your own? The PPC is a place for people to talk to each other; it gives rather a bad impression if you only comment on threads you started.
hS -
Re: Um, N. Harmonik. by
on 2015-08-13 20:01:00 UTC
Link to this
Er, what kind of bad impression?
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Re: Um, N. Harmonik. by
on 2015-08-13 20:03:00 UTC
Link to this
The kind of impression that you're only here for yourself. The PPC is a community first.
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Re: Um, N. Harmonik. by
on 2015-08-13 20:00:00 UTC
Link to this
I'm afraid that, if I ask them all at once, I won't get all of them answered.
I'll try to be more sociable. -
Have no fear of that! by
on 2015-08-13 20:08:00 UTC
Link to this
We're a very detail-oriented lot here. If one person can't answer all your questions, someone else will definitely pop up to fill in the blanks.
~Neshomeh -
Remakes? by
on 2015-08-15 17:42:00 UTC
Link to this
What if a story that's been done in a mission is remade? Do you do that one if it's almost as bad as the original? And if a story already had been remade before any missions were done, do you do the original, the remake or both?
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Not sure about others, but Firemagic and I almost did that. by
on 2015-08-16 10:56:00 UTC
Link to this
Despite giving concrit for the original (and then missioning it, though that is likely unknown by the author and is better that way), the remake was... well, actually worse on a logic standpoint.
However, no more than a single chapter was ever written of it, so we didn't have enough material for a mission.
Fun fact: two of the Agents involved in the original would have been retired by the time the remake would have gotten missioned, so they would've been there unofficially, and another Agent who was recruited from that badfic would've ended up being dragged into the new fic (Poor Theia). -
Re: Have no fear of that! by
on 2015-08-13 20:18:00 UTC
Link to this
Whoops, forgot one:
4. How do human disguises work for the smallest and largest agents? -
The same way they work for everybody else, I reckon. by
on 2015-08-13 23:46:00 UTC
Link to this
Of course, finding yourself in a much larger body might be very confusing for someone like Corolla, who is normally a few inches tall.
Generally speaking disguises are like a new body; you have to get used to them. Remember how Za'kiir had problems with a human disguise since he's a Khajiit and they have digitigrade feet? -
The same way they work for everyone else? by
on 2015-08-13 20:46:00 UTC
Link to this
Maybe I'm not understanding the question. What are you trying to get at?
~Neshomeh -
Re: The same way they work for everyone else? by
on 2015-08-14 03:17:00 UTC
Link to this
Are the disguises holograms or solid? Because if it's the former, it'll be awkward for the smallest and largest agents if something appears to touch the disguise and goes right through!
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They're actual, solid bodies. by
on 2015-08-14 03:22:00 UTC
Link to this
The Disguise Generator doesn't just change the outward appearance but alters the agent's DNA so they really do become the species in question, as explained here.
Just a friendly reminder, we like it when people do the research before asking. Thanks. -
Re: They're actual, solid bodies. by
on 2015-08-14 03:32:00 UTC
Link to this
Do all agents have to have a known home continuum?
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In more detail by
on 2015-08-14 03:39:00 UTC
Link to this
Iximaz ninja'd me on the base issue, but it's slightly more complicated than that. Many agents, such as Jay and Acacia, are from "World One," a mildly fictionalized version of the Real World. Other agents come from unpublished works of fiction, such as Mittens and the Radioactive Moss Creature. Some agents even come from AU versions of the Real World, like Agent!Des. That said, you should probably have some idea of what the setting your character comes from is like, just to flesh out their backstory.
Unless you have some very specific reasons for asking your questions, I'd recommend spending more time going through the wiki and just reading whatever comes up that looks interesting. That's how I got into the PPC at first, and it's a good way to learn the details of the canon. If you're asking for a Permission prompt and want more detailed opinions, you can always email someone. I've made my username clickable if you want to contact me. -
Re: In more detail by
on 2015-08-14 03:56:00 UTC
Link to this
Unpublished works of fiction, you say? Hmm...
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Mostly written by the Boarders by
on 2015-08-14 04:00:00 UTC
Link to this
Lots of people use characters they've created for their own stories but ended up not using. It can be a good way to develop them. Personally, I think it'd be cool to see a character who comes from a series that only exists within another continuum, but it'd be hard to write, I think.
Is there any particular reason you're asking? I feel like all your questions are probably building to a certain point, and it might be easier for you to just say what you're thinking directly, instead of just asking a bunch of individual questions. -
Re: Mostly written by the Boarders by
on 2015-08-14 04:31:00 UTC
Link to this
I want to join the PPC. I already have a couple of badfics I want to do missions on. I'm thinking of using a character from the universe of my own books which aren't complete yet.
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In that case... by
on 2015-08-14 05:42:00 UTC
Link to this
I'll second Tira's advice to spend more time reading stuff on the wiki, and I'll add that you should allow it to lead you to missions and other PPC stories, too. That's really one of the main reasons it exists, and there's no better way to understand the PPC than by reading the actual stories people have written about it, old and new alike.
Out of curiosity, what spin-offs have you read so far?
~Neshomeh -
Re: In that case... by
on 2015-08-14 23:13:00 UTC
Link to this
Let's see... Imposter for PotC, The Fine Art of Copy-Pasting for PMMM, Of Monsters and Machines for FNaF and Godzilla and I'm in the middle of reading the Rose Potter missions.
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So you haven't read TOS? by
on 2015-08-15 00:24:00 UTC
Link to this
You really need to read those, since after all that's the canon we're writing from. Aside from that, I mostly just read whichever ones look interesting from the fandoms I know. Neshomeh's spin-offs are really good, and I'd definitely recommend Trojie and Pads' missions if you want to get into Bad Slash.
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Re: So you haven't read TOS? by
on 2015-08-15 01:51:00 UTC
Link to this
I have read some of the Original Series. You asked what spin-offs I read, not what missions.
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Well, some is great... by
on 2015-08-15 01:58:00 UTC
Link to this
But you really ought to read all of it. If you want to get Permission to write your own PPC spin-off, you gotta know the canon we base ours off of, after all.
Otherwise you'd be doing the equivalent of writing Harry Potter fanfic after only watching a handful of the movies. ;) -
Re: Well, some is great... by
on 2015-08-15 02:23:00 UTC
Link to this
http://plotprotectors.tripod.com/TOS/
Is this all of them? -
Yep! (nm) by
on 2015-08-15 02:33:00 UTC
Link to this
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Remakes? by
on 2015-08-16 03:39:00 UTC
Link to this
What if a story that's been done in a mission is remade? Do you do that one if it's almost as bad as the original? And if a story already had been remade before any missions were done, do you do the original, the remake or both?
-
I reckon it's on case-by-case basis... by
on 2015-08-16 05:27:00 UTC
Link to this
As it depends, for the most part, on just how different the remake is, compared to the original.
Also, I think that most people won't mission a story again. I do know, however, that the fic "Unpleasant Memories" is a mission about got a remake and Firemagic and Sergio Turbo were considering missioning the remake, but did not because it was abandoned. -
I thought it might be something like that. by
on 2015-08-14 05:26:00 UTC
Link to this
In the future, it might be helpful if you say that up front, so that people can give you more direct answers. Sometimes your questions seem a bit random, so it can be hard to give useful information. ^^
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Well, you've already 'joined'. by
on 2015-08-14 04:34:00 UTC
Link to this
Just by posting on the Board means you're already a member of the PPC. :)
What you mean by 'joining' is you want to get Permission. -
Actually, I didn't... by
on 2015-08-14 03:41:00 UTC
Link to this
My gmail address is roserpemail
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Nope. (nm) by
on 2015-08-14 03:34:00 UTC
Link to this
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Re: They're actual, solid bodies. by
on 2015-08-14 03:30:00 UTC
Link to this
Darn it, it didn't occur to me to type [disguise] first instead of [human] in the search bar.
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Re: Have no fear of that! by
on 2015-08-13 20:17:00 UTC
Link to this
I guess I could try:
1. How do you pick Continuum Identification Codes and why doesn't the list on the Wiki have ones for all the franchises done in missions so far?
2. What's the longest badfic (barring series) that's ever been missioned on?
3. Who around here are experts on the Teen Titans cartoon? -
1 and 2 by
on 2015-08-13 20:45:00 UTC
Link to this
- The structure of the codes is explained on the relevant wiki page. They're picked by anyone who feels like it, basically. There isn't a full list because not many people have bothered.
2. Hard to say. Missions usually end before the actual fic does, especially if it's a really long fic. You'd probably have to do some serious research to find that out. Or, do you mean what's the longest mission to a single fic? ... You'd probably need to do some serious research to find that out, too, but I'd recommend starting with Herr Wozzeck's and SkarmorySilver's spin-offs.
~Neshomeh
- The structure of the codes is explained on the relevant wiki page. They're picked by anyone who feels like it, basically. There isn't a full list because not many people have bothered.
-
Question 3 by
on 2015-08-13 20:24:00 UTC
Link to this
If you're asking about the 2003 Murakami series, I guess I know it kinda well.
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Not so much. by
on 2015-08-13 19:37:00 UTC
Link to this
Apart from series/connected works such as Rose Potter, That Series, and Marrissa Picard, it's considered poor form to deliberately pick on any given author's works more than once. I'm sure this has been expressed to you before, but the PPC is about critiquing bad writing, not bullying people.
We might make an exception for known trolls, I suppose, but I don't think that's been done. Trollfic often isn't worth PPCing in the first place.
~Neshomeh -
Probably THAT Series. (nm) by
on 2015-08-13 19:09:00 UTC
Link to this
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Minis From Different Works in the Same Universe? by
on 2015-08-13 22:06:00 UTC
Link to this
Would they be the same? For instance, would a LOTR-mini be the same as a mini from a Hobbit or (Eru forbid) Silmarillion badfic?
More specifically, since I've been trawling through Brotherband badfic in search of something good to read, would a Brotherband mini be the same as a Ranger's Apprentice mini? -
I believe they're all the same. by
on 2015-08-13 22:23:00 UTC
Link to this
I'm fairly certain that all minis from a single continuum are the same, although there's one sort-of-exception. There are five different minis for Avatar: The Last Airbender. As far as I know, any M-e fic, regardless of the original work it's based on, will use mini-Balrogs.
However, I'm still rather new, so an older Boarder might know of other exceptions or loopholes.
Speaking of being new, have you looked at our Sib Houses? We have an article on the wiki; basically, an older PPCer will "adopt" a new one, to help them learn their way around the community. My personal Big Sib is Iximaz. We exchanged email addresses, and that's about all you have to do. Are you interested? -
I have not! by
on 2015-08-13 22:27:00 UTC
Link to this
I haven't heard of those, no, but I'll definitely check them out. Thanks!
-
No problem! by
on 2015-08-13 22:31:00 UTC
Link to this
Here's a link to the Big Sib/Little Sib page. It's got a list of Houses and who's in them, so you might find it more useful than the first one.
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The page Alleb linked is a tad out of date. by
on 2015-08-13 22:29:00 UTC
Link to this
Try looking here instead. :)
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An issue with the wiki. by
on 2015-08-13 22:07:00 UTC
Link to this
Let me preface this by saying that the Rose Potter and C*l*br**n missions have my highest respect. No way I could read through either fics, even for sporking. They're the most notable missions we have, which is why they're often seen on the sidebar of the wiki.
But...
Is there any chance that we could change their images? I get that the pictures are meant to convey the content of the article, but even though they're not explicit I always try to cover up their part of the screen. It would also be supremely awkward to try and explain what they mean to a non-Boarder, or to have someone see them over my shoulder. Is there something less uncomfortable we could change them to? -
Well... by
on 2015-08-13 22:14:00 UTC
Link to this
On a personal level, if you have Adblock, you can also use it to block specific images. There should be an option to do that if you right-click them.
I think the images work, and it's probably okay to have them on the wikipages themselves, since they're already tagged as NSFW. But it might be a good idea not to have images from NSFW pages pop up on SFW ones. -
Agreed. by
on 2015-08-13 23:36:00 UTC
Link to this
I've no problems with NSFW pictures on pages marked as such, but the fact that some of them pop up in pages that are supposed to be SFW is problematic. For example: C*l*br**n's pic tends to pop up in the 'popular pages' sidebar when you use the search function. Can this be changed?
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Yes, but it would require a wiki admin. (nm) by
on 2015-08-14 14:21:00 UTC
Link to this
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Really? How? by
on 2015-08-14 14:32:00 UTC
Link to this
I'm assuming you're talking about excluding Clbr__n from popping up on 'See Also', rather than about changing the picture (which would not require an admin, obviously). I'm looking through the Admin menus, and can't find anything that would obviously do that...
hS -
By editing the user interface. by
on 2015-08-14 15:41:00 UTC
Link to this
Usually you could do it by editing http://ppc.wikia.com/wiki/MediaWiki:Photosblacklist
Unfortunetly, the entire Mediawiki namespace has been locked due to an internal security breach until further notice. i'll let you know when they unlock it. -
On a similar topic... by
on 2015-08-14 18:25:00 UTC
Link to this
Do you happen to know if there's a way to set which image appears as the thumbnail for a page with multiple images? I would assume it would always be the first image that appears, but sometimes it isn't, and it bugs me.
~Neshomeh -
I'm not sure what you mean. by
on 2015-08-14 19:33:00 UTC
Link to this
Where does the thumbnail appear?
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Thumbnails by
on 2015-08-15 02:36:00 UTC
Link to this
Each Category page displays eight thumbnails for certain pages (most recently edited, maybe?), and thumbnails also appear under "Read More" at the bottom of each article. If there's no image, you just get the first few words of the article in a large size.
I've found some thumbnails not displaying as I would expect them to in the Department of Bad Slash category. Luxury and Suicide are both given thumbnails, but neither of them displays an image, despite the fact that both of their articles contain images. It's weird, and I'd like to have a little more control over it.
~Neshomeh -
They aren't big enough. by
on 2015-08-15 14:52:00 UTC
Link to this
The images on those pages are too small to fit in the thumbnail spot. Try adding a larger image to the page.
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Ohhh, I see. by
on 2015-08-16 15:24:00 UTC
Link to this
Apparently they have to be bigger than 130px by 115px. Sheesh, the width for the TekTek images is only 10px off. Easy enough to add that.
~Neshomeh -
And category exhibition might help. (nm) by
on 2015-08-15 17:26:00 UTC
Link to this
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Oops, that was me. (nm) by
on 2015-08-14 15:41:00 UTC
Link to this
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I don't, unfortunately. by
on 2015-08-13 22:34:00 UTC
Link to this
Yeah, I think it might be too risky. After all, the Ironic Overpower will make things as awful as possible.
- Alleb, who likes pretending she's on World One, and keeps forgetting to sign off on all of her posts like she means to.
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On the Subject of Badfic Authors... by
on 2015-08-13 22:19:00 UTC
Link to this
I got to thinking. Are any of you dudes former badfic authors who had their fics sporked and joined the PPC because of it?
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Actually... by
on 2015-08-13 22:24:00 UTC
Link to this
I think the majority of us ex-badficcers (myself included) later joined up after realizing we were bad, and later took on our old shames as missions. Most people who get their missions sporked and find out later throw a tantrum, rather than going "Ooh, sign me up!"
That being said, I'm curious now if anyone here did actually join after getting sporked.
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Help with Dutch? by
on 2015-08-14 00:55:00 UTC
Link to this
Hello everybody! Is there, perchance, a Dutch speaker here? I have a few questions about the language. To explain: Navare uses the Kabupatenic style of MGLN-verse magic, which is analogous to Dutch. I would like to name a few of his spells, but I'd rather not use Google Translate (for obvious reasons). Can anyone help me?
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Geen probleem! by
on 2015-08-14 11:25:00 UTC
Link to this
While I'm not familiar with the MGLN-verse, Dutch is my native language, so I can help you with translating English to Dutch and weather it 'sounds right'. If you need help with (formal) grammar, I'll give it my best shot, but Dutch is a damm annoying language when it comes to that. We often say it's a language with a few simple rules, and a whole book of exceptions to them...
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Thankee kindly! by
on 2015-08-14 23:00:00 UTC
Link to this
It's nothing too complicated, just a couple words here and there. Can you please drop me an e-mail? The address is sur DOT nhm AT gmail DOT com.
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"Meant her," Dawn murmured. by
on 2015-08-14 01:02:00 UTC
Link to this
She was smiling dreamily, her eyes fixed on Des'. A breath later, she leaned up and they were kissing again.
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Nilera rubbed her pointed chin... by
on 2015-08-14 01:04:00 UTC
Link to this
An amused expression on her face. Des, meanwhile, was too busy snogging Dawn to actually notice anything.
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They kept on snogging. by
on 2015-08-14 01:10:00 UTC
Link to this
Someone wandered by. In the distance, a seagull stole a kid's french fries, and a quarian tried to confess her love for a Time Lady while two more agents kept commenting.
They paused for breath and resumed. The ice cream line, oddly enough, didn't move...
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A notice appears on the Cafeteria bulletin board... by
on 2015-08-14 17:46:00 UTC
Link to this
SEEKING
Good homes for two (2) Pernese fire-lizards:
unconditional love, very intelligent, very useful.
Will consider any reasonable trade.
Infrastructure preferred; will consider Action if mental stability is assured.
Must be available to attend the eggs' hatching at short notice.
Instruction on care and feeding will be provided.
For more information, please contact Agents Supernumerary and Ilraen at RC 999,
ICEP address [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
Please CC any message to Nurse Jennifer Robinson at [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
Thank you!
So, who wants a fire-lizard? {= D
Once it's settled who's getting one, I'd like to run a little RP of the hatching. Basically, you'll play your character, I'll play my characters and the eggs/hatchlings up until Impression is made; then control of your hatchling is yours. Since they're fire-lizards, you get to name them, but I'll decide the color based on the agent's personality and behavior at the event. Keeps things a little suspenseful. {= )
This is all nostalgic and warm-fuzzy for me, you guys. I really wanna make this happen. ^_^
~Neshomeh -
Update! by
on 2015-08-19 18:40:00 UTC
Link to this
So here's the current situation.
There are twelve available fire-lizard eggs. These are the bidders who are definitely getting one:
1. Alex Dives
2. Alleb
3. Wobbles (but really the Notary)
4. Bosh'Guk
5. Desdendelle
6. Teyala Solnerii
7. Someone from BM
8. Dawn McKenna
9. The Lichen
As you can see, that's nine, so there are three eggs extra. I... really thought a few more people were going to respond to the last-call notice. >.>;
I'm hoping to start the hatching RP tomorrow, since I have the day off, so I'm thinking I'll give people the chance to join in at the last minute when I make the announcement here. This has been pretty poorly organized, and that's my fault, so I wanna make sure nobody's left out just because they were confused or something.
If I still end up with extra eggs, does anybody want a second one? Like, maybe Bosh AND Guk get to have one, and/or the Notary AND Wobbles, and/or two BM guys?
Failing that, maybe my characters will end up Impressing after all. >.> That's not the plan at all, but in-character, if there are hatchlings in danger of going between and dying, they're not gonna let that happen, so yeah.
~Neshomeh, contingency-planning. -
Re: Update! by
on 2015-08-20 00:55:00 UTC
Link to this
Alex getting two friends to comfort him after spoilers would be nice. But it's cool whatever happens. :)
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Well... by
on 2015-08-20 00:25:00 UTC
Link to this
If there's a spare, I'd like a second one. Because fire-lizards. Cute. (Of course I'd be super amused at Ilraen Impressing, or Nume for that matter.)
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Bid from DoSAT, T&A! by
on 2015-08-19 22:09:00 UTC
Link to this
To: RC#999 [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
From: Technician Shui-Hua Liu [shliu.console1219lk226u6c3482b15289.DangerRoom.DoSATT&A]
CC: [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
Subject: Something about fire-lizards.
Greetings Nurse Robinson!
It recently came to my knowledge that you have 'fire-lizard' eggs for trade. I don't know why no one told me about that sooner! I gathered that it was a notice in the Cafeteria, but I never go to that place, the food is horrible and probably still alive, that's why I prefer going to -- Wait... What was the subject again? Oh yes, fire-lizards trade. The reason I ask about it, is that I think it might be... beneficial for my mental health, to care for someone, besides me, and to have some company over here.
Okay, if there are still eggs available, well, I don't know exactly what the inhabitants of RC #999 are looking for, but I have some gadgets from superhero universes, and if don't have it, I canforceaskmy slavesthe agents of RC #2814, to fetch something you'd like to get.
Currently, I have:
- A Bat-Sue's utility belt.
- Harley's Punch Glove Gun
- Some Batarangs
- A Bat-Grappling Gun
I also have a Water Tribe pendant(it... brings bad memories...), some bags of Jasmine Dragon's jasmine tea (You know, General Iroh's special brew), scraps of Mandalorian Iron (that you can get someone to forge something out of them), and a stash of paper money from the United Republic of Nations. I also have some standard issue Imperial weaponry from Star Wars, but I don't think you're looking for mere weaponry. Failing any of that, I... offer my services repairing damaged equipment for the next three months, free of charge.
Appreciating your kind attention.
- Technician Shui-Hua Liu, Department of Sufficiently Advanced Technology, Testing and Application Division. -
Correction. by
on 2015-08-19 20:33:00 UTC
Link to this
I forgot about Brightbeard—he's in, too. So, just two eggs going spare as of now.
~Neshomeh -
Funnily enough... by
on 2015-08-19 18:52:00 UTC
Link to this
About 25 or so hours after your last call post, I realized that Kozar with a fire-lizard sounded awesome. Blame autocorrect--it kept putting in his name, so that I was talking about fire-kozars instead of fire-lizards. So I started thinking, but by then it was too late.
Anyway. If you do end up with extra eggs in the end, I'm happy to claim one for Kozar. Klingon with a fire-lizard--what's not to like? I expect Victoria's Pov might get jealous, too, which could be hilarious.
...which reminds me: at some point, someone should definitely write about an agent who adopts a POV rather than a pov. All the giant POVs. All the loud snrfs. All the threats of stampeding. Yes, please.
~DF -
Final notice! by
on 2015-08-17 01:26:00 UTC
Link to this
I think I've got about as many bids as eggs at this point (12 now, if you missed that), so I'm gonna call an end to the bidding 24 hours from the time of this post. Get 'em in before then, or you're out of luck!
Also note that I'm setting a couple rules as of now in case I end up with more bids than eggs:
1. Infrastructure agents get priority. This is purely for in-universe reasons: they'll have an easier time caring for their new friends, training them, etc. Also, Action agents aren't supposed to take pets on missions, and fire-lizards will make that pretty difficult (though not impossible). From an out-of-universe perspective, though, I demand stories of fire-lizards making trouble for their Action owners in the field. It should be fun. *eg*
2. One egg per Boarder. I think everyone got this intuitively, but just so it's clear. {= ) (I may go back on this if I'm figuring wrong and I end up with an extra egg or two.)
If it comes down to deciding who's in and who's out, it'll be purely from an in-universe standpoint. So, that's who has a better bid and who's more emotionally stable and responsible. Familiarity with Pern is a bonus.
Oh, and characters with real people behind them get priority, too, so if it's a choice between the Lichen and a player character, the PC wins.
~Neshomeh -
A bid from RC 18! by
on 2015-08-17 22:31:00 UTC
Link to this
To: RC#999 [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
From: Agent Dawn McKenna [dawnm.console17015dm997091sh62442.rc18.DMS]
CC: [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
Subject: Re: Fire-lizards!
Hello!
As you can see above, my name is Dawn McKenna, currently with the DMS. I've been around since late 2006 and have never been stuck in FicPsych for an extended stay (that is, my level of insanity is within the accepted range for agents and has stayed there for the past 8 and a half years. Wow, time flies). That should speak for my mental stability. I used to be a big fan of the Pern series, too; I read more of the books than I can count on two hands. I wouldn't say I remember everything I read, but I'm sure I can find the resources to fill in the gaps--wikis, books, that sort of thing. I'm good with research. I also have a good history with animals and minis of varying sorts: we had pet rabbits and pet guinea pigs before I joined the PPC, and I currently live with several minis, a pov, and a tribble. We all get along pretty well, too. You can meet some or all of them, if you like.
As for trades...I'm not completely sure what sort of things you prefer, but maybe one or more of these will interest you. If not, feel free to let me know what sort of thing you're looking for, and I'll see what I have--I've collected a lot of odds and ends.
I can offer you:
-A Tortall-verse sword, Carthaki steel blade (ridiculous Sue, thought she could steal Jon from Thayet--but her weaponry wasn't bad.)
-One of those medical scanner things from Star Trek: TOS (you know, those things that Dr. McCoy uses that were actually pepper shakers or somesuch. This one has a tendency to get bleen stripes when scanning Vulcans, but otherwise seems to work perfectly. Can be calibrated for out of universe aliens if you know how, I expect.)
-A tribble. Or several. (Not currently, uh, born, but if you want one or several I can feed my tribble a very, very small amount of whatever's lying around. That should do it.)
-Torchwood-verse Retcon. (Very useful if your neuralyzer stops working--they're amnesia pills. Once swallowed, the person gets sleepy--well, with the mix I have, anyway, there's a mild sedative included--and when they wake up, they've forgotten however much time you calculated the dose for. Can be dissolved in liquid.)
-A Quick-Quotes Quill. (To quote the HP Lexicon: "A quill that is enchanted to be set up on a sheet of paper without human support, which when activated will write an exaggerated account of whatever is said in its presence." Very fun to use if you're charging a Sue or replacement who's been using really purple prose.)
-Three dragon scales from the Enchanted Forest Chronicles, green and gold. (Not much practical use, but very pretty. Also useful as bookmarks and coasters.)
-Crocheted scarves. (Made by me. I have some extras by now. I tend to just use whatever yarn I had with me or could find, so the color combinations are odd on some of them, but they're nice and warm and they aren't itchy. The yarn is mostly nice quality too.)
Again, if none of those are things you're interested in, let me know what sort of thing you're looking for and I'll see what I can dig up.
Yrs sincerely,
Agent Dawn McKenna
--
((Hopefully this is coming in before the 24 hours are up. I can't quite tell what time zone the Board is set on. I'd also like to add that Dawn can be serious: a lot of the craziness goes towards missions, and can be dropped, especially when she's put in charge of something or someone. Especially a child of any sort. She just...generally does prefer to run around grinning maniacally and quoting everything in sight. I'm also fairly sure she's been going to FicPsych to chat for years now; she tried it reluctantly a while back, probably at T'Zar's urging, and found it was helpful. So she's pretty far from flamethrower-crazy. She's pretty responsible overall, and adores anything that is fluffy or dragon-like. She will probably get bouncy at some point during the hatching, of course, assuming her bid gets accepted :)
Also? I really, really, really want to see someone write a charge list using a Quick-Quotes Quill. That would be hilarious.
Anyway. Here goes!
~DF)) -
Re. RC 18 by
on 2015-08-19 19:02:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Agent Dawn McKenna [dawnm.console17015dm997091sh62442.rc18.DMS]
From: RC #999 [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
CC: Jennifer Robinson [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
Subject: Re: Fire-lizards!
Agent McKenna,
Hello, and thank you for contacting us! I have enjoyed considering your variety of offers. My partner will be very pleased to accept the TOS scanner to add to what is becoming a complete collection. We shall avoid scanning any Vulcans—not that we would have much opportunity to do so.
If you are willing to throw in the Retcon and one of your scarves, as well, we would call that a very good deal. For the scarf, I am not partial to any particular colors, but if you have something that would look nice with both blue fur and red hair, that would be most appreciated.
Agent Ilraen
RC 999
Department of Implausible Crossovers -
(( Accepted, FYI. )) by
on 2015-08-18 22:57:00 UTC
Link to this
I know I gotta respond to this thread more before it vanishes. I've gotten busy working on this, though. It's distracting. ^_^;
~Neshomeh, attention span of a gnat. -
((welp, that's me running around screaming excitedly again)) by
on 2015-08-19 18:54:00 UTC
Link to this
This is fantastic. As is the guide on the Board.
~DF -
...huh, what do you know. The Board's on my timezone. by
on 2015-08-17 22:33:00 UTC
Link to this
I must have been remembering from the first year I was a Boarder--I was living in a different country. Now I know.
~DF -
Also, in-character bids, please! by
on 2015-08-17 01:30:00 UTC
Link to this
It's just more fun that way. {= )
~Neshomeh -
OOC: by
on 2015-08-17 22:28:00 UTC
Link to this
Just to make sure, Notary's bid was okay, right? Only, she is broken, on a profound and personal level (has been since her last regeneration), and I'm intrigued as to how a low-level telepathic organism responds to that. Pity'd be my guess, but it's still going to be fun to watch. =]
-
Yeah, 's cool. by
on 2015-08-17 22:38:00 UTC
Link to this
And, well, I'm kinda hoping it'll help her, actually. {= ) She's going to have to be mindful of her mental state if she wants to keep the critter around. Worst-case scenario, it'll get fed up with her and go feral. Up to you what kind of story you're writing.
And now I really must leave for work ack running!
~Neshomeh -
I do actually have a thing in mind to help her. by
on 2015-08-17 22:57:00 UTC
Link to this
Sort of a tough love approach, but, y'know. Whatever works.
((Translation: the sole good thing in the Notary's life she had left by her fifth regeneration is here... and is just as disgusted with her as every other sentient being. If that's not an incentive to change yer damn tune, I don't know what is. =] )) -
BM's attempt at an offer, or somesuch. by
on 2015-08-17 00:10:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Agents Supernumerary and Ilraen [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
CC: [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
From: Colt [cglimmerhand.console9126413a05.rc20.DO]
Subject: Fire-Lizards, huh?
One free ‘you broke it we’ll fix it’ no questions asked no lectures given.
-Colt -
BM's Final Offer by
on 2015-08-17 00:34:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Agents Supernumerary and Ilraen [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
CC: [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH], Building Maintenance [BM.DO]
From: Denny Robbs [drobbs.console9126413a05.rc20.DO]
Subject: Fire-lizards
BM has a sizable group who want to adopt fire-lizards, so I'm throwing in for everyone a final offer: Three favors, Colt's electric work offer without including the Console, and prioritizing any job you have once.
We can figure out who's actually there for the hatching later if you accept.
Denny Robbs -
Eek, I almost forgot this one. by
on 2015-08-19 19:13:00 UTC
Link to this
(( I may have been a bit overwhelmed by the guys' bickering. Sorry. ^_^; ))
To: Denny Robbs [drobbs.console9126413a05.rc20.DO]
From: Agents Supernumerary and Ilraen [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
CC: Jennifer Robinson [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH], Building Maintenance [BM.DO]
Subject: Re: Fire-lizards
Agent Robbs,
Thank you (and the rest) for your interest. We accept your offer and we will guarantee at least one egg in return, with the possibility of two at no extra cost if any are still unclaimed when they begin to hatch. We know they could be quite useful to your crew, and we appreciate the value of your work.
Please let us know who will attend the hatching so we may keep them informed.
Agent Ilraen
RC 999
Department of Implausible Crossovers
(( And with that, I think I've responded to everybody at least once. Personal suckage has been reduced! )) -
OOC: With a twist! by
on 2015-08-17 00:12:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Agents Supernumerary and Ilraen[console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
CC: Jenni [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH], Colt [cglimmerhand.console9126413a05.rc20.DO]
From: Gerry [Gcavendish.console9126413a05.rc20.DO]
Subject: Re: Fire-Lizards, huh?
He’s not responsible enough for a pet, don’t do it.
I’ll bump it up to two favors from BM.
-Gerry -
OOC: Yes. by
on 2015-08-17 00:13:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Agents Supernumerary and Ilraen [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
CC: Jenni[jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH], Gerry [Gcavendish.console9126413a05.rc20.DO]
From: Colt [cglimmerhand.console9126413a05.rc20.DO]
Subject: Re: Fire-Lizards, huh?
What! I’m totally responsible!
Two favors *and* electrical work of your choice up to and including the console so long as you don’t let DoSAT know.
-Colt -
OOC: Almost! by
on 2015-08-17 00:14:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Agents Supernumerary and Ilraen [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
CC: Jenni [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH], Colt [cglimmerhand.console9126413a05.rc20.DO]
From: Gerry [Gcavendish.console9126413a05.rc20.DO]
Subject: Re: Fire-Lizards, huh?
Don’t trust the idiot half-elf with a fire-lizard.
Two favors and I’ll bump your RC up the queue in case of any problems.
-Gerry -
OOC: Okay maybe not. by
on 2015-08-17 00:17:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Agents Supernumerary and Ilraen [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
CC:Jenni [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH], Gerry [Gcavendish.console9126413a05.rc20.DO]
From: Colt [cglimmerhand.console9126413a05.rc20.DO]
Subject: Re: Fire-Lizards, huh?
I’m totally trustworthy!
Three favors, the electrical work, and I’ve got unrestricted access to our supply ordering system if you know what I mean.
-Colt -
OOC: I have a problem. by
on 2015-08-17 00:26:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Colt [cglimmerhand.console9126413a05.rc20.DO]
CC: Building Maintenance [BM.DO]
From: Denny Robbs [drobbs.console9126413a05.rc20.DO]
Subject: Fire-Lizards, Supplies
Colt's off the list for unrestricted access for ordering supplies just so everyone knows.
Also, are we seriously getting into a bidding war for fire-lizards between ourselves? Seriously? Be adults, people.
-Denny -
OOC: I don't know what it's called. by
on 2015-08-17 00:28:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Denny Robbs [drobbs.console9126413a05.rc20.DO]
From: Colt & Gerry [console9126413a05.rc20.DO]
Subject: BM & Fire-Lizards
I'm rescinding Colt's last offer with a final one
Subject: Re: BM & Fire-Lizards
But we really want fire-lizards! They're like dragons but less terrifying!
Also, dammit, hoping you wouldn't notice.
-Colt (and Gerry too)
Mostly I just wanted the fire-lizards.
-Gerry -
A notice from RC 211 by
on 2015-08-16 06:06:00 UTC
Link to this
We thank you kindly for the offer, but we'll have to decline.
See, our RC is already rather infested with minis. As for dragons, we recently rescued an Inheritance-verse dragon egg, so we're still keeping an eye on that in case it chooses someone.
Also, Valon doesn't know Pern all that well, and I'm a bit too lazy/busy to read the books myself. We wouldn't know how to care for them.
With apologies,
-Kala Jeng (Department of Floaters) -
Ahem. by
on 2015-08-15 09:56:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Agents Supernumerary and Ilraen, RC 999 [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
From: The Lichen [lcladoniastellaris.console66.DIC]
Subject: Ahem.
I assume you were intending to offer one of these eggs to your Department Head. Perhaps the letter simply got lost in the post, hmm? On this occasion, I suppose I can overlook your tardiness - and the small matter of your trading in a controlled flammiferous species - if you rectify your error immediately.
The Lichen, Head of Department, Implausible Crossovers
((I've always liked the 'species name + very short console number' structure for Flower ICEP addresses; not all of them adhere to it, but I felt the Lichen should. This did require half an hour of searching to find an appropriate species...))
((hS)) -
Re: Ahem. by
on 2015-08-16 14:47:00 UTC
Link to this
To: The Lichen [lcladoniastellaris.console66.DIC]
From: [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
CC: Agents Supernumerary and Ilraen, RC 999 [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
Subject: Re: Fwd: Ahem.
Hello; this is Nurse Robinson with FicPsych. You may already know that I'm overseeing this matter as a former resident of Pern (AU)—Harper and Weyrwoman. It's all in my file.
With all due respect, sir, you're a lichen. How do you plan to feed the hatchling to make Impression, oil its hide if it's dry, train it? I mean, I know you're all powerful psychics, so I guess the answer to all that is telekinesis and telepathy, but even so, fire-lizards are social creatures. They need to touch and be touched. I'm concerned that any bond you make wouldn't last very long, unless you somehow forced it. Need I say that I literally shuddered typing that?
Please, sir, consider the very long life of your potential friend. Would it be a good one?
~Jenni Robinson
Section 31, Room C-14
Department of Fictional Psychology
P.S. Don't worry, nobody's sneaking any firestone into HQ if I can help it. I'll be keeping track of every Impression, so if anyone's critter is caught flaming, I'll know who to sic the DIA on.
(( I promise I'm not objecting on the basis of "Status Quo Is God." The idea of the Lichen with a fire-lizard deputy rather amuses me, actually, but these are legitimate concerns! )) -
Response. by
on 2015-08-17 09:10:00 UTC
Link to this
To: [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
From: The Lichen [lcladoniastellaris.console66.DIC]
CC: Agents Supernumerary and Ilraen, RC 999 [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
Subject: I am appalled.
Nurse Robinson, I am appalled that you would even consider comparing any Flower to the Mysterious Somebody. Do you think I do not remember the so-called 'Lofty Skies insanity'? Do you somehow imagine that I have forgotten the horrors that Nurse Hyrax - and doubtless many others who did not live to tell the tale - underwent?
For your information - though this is, as you might say, 'all in the files' anyway - telepathic controls have long allowed for Hornbeam's people to build 'artificial limbs', animal-like robotics which feel and operate like the real thing. Feeding and oiling a fire-lizard is well within my capabilities.
No doubt you are about to suggest that 'mechanical add-ons do not count as touching'; that would imply a severe lack of insight on your part. Touch only has meaning because of the mind behind it, and my mind is far more capable of making contact with a fire-lizard's than one of my agents'. Just ask the Queen Anne's Lace and that Daisy if you don't believe me.
-The Lichen, Head of Department, Implausible Crossovers
P.S: You speak of 'very long life' when you plan on giving eggs to humans? Tsk. Regardless, the Medical Research Division has almost completed the [That information is classified, sir. We don't know who's reading. ~Duros Black]
To clarify:
-He's very upset at the idea that he'd force a telepathic bond, since that was the Mysterious Somebody's whole thing.
-Artificial limbs run by and backed by telepathy ought to fill in quite nicely for physical limbs. ('Then why don't the Flowers use them all the time?' Whatever for? That's why they have agents. ^_^)
-Since the Door to the Future RP, the MRD have been working on anti-aging drugs for the Flowers. Apparently they're nearly there. Shh - top secret.
-The DIA is apparently reading his mail. I'm guessing they have a filter up which catches mentions of classified material.
hS
(And I'm not particularly invested in the idea, though it seems the Lichen is. It's not like I even have any DIC agents! ~hS) -
A message from someone in Operations. by
on 2015-08-15 08:49:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Agents Supernumerary and Ilraen, RC 999 [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
CC: Jennifer Robinson [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
From: Teyala Solnerii [tsolnerii.console18513hr51394713br2346.rc580.OPS]
Subject: Cafeteria Bulletin
* * * * * * * * * *
Hello there!
I would like to put myself forward as an adoptive candidate for one of the Pernese fire-lizards mentioned in your bulletin. It'd be nice to have some regular company when I'm off of work. Jennifer can speak for my "mental stability" and reliability; we know each other from her visits to the Nursery. As for items to trade, I have a selection of artifacts from the Mass Effect universe collected over my previous career. I can also provide advanced weaponry if need be. I also have some leverage with people in both Ops and Personnel, not to mention with those in a certain… private gathering place in which there may or may not be libations and related activities.
Thank you for your time and I wish you the best of luck in finding those fire-lizards some good homes!
Teyala Solnerii -
Response by
on 2015-08-16 15:08:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Teyala Solnerii [tsolnerii.console18513hr51394713br2346.rc580.OPS]
From: Agents Supernumerary and Ilraen, RC 999 [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
CC: Jennifer Robinson [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
Subject: Re: Cafeteria Bulletin
Agent Solnerii,
Hello, and thank you for your interest! We are quickly running out of available eggs, but since you are in Operations, we believe your bid should take a high priority for the wellbeing of the hatchling.
Furthermore, we are tantalized by the hint you have dropped regarding said private gathering place. We understand that a high quality tabletop game runs there regularly. I have never role-played before, but my partner has, and I would like to learn, if only to understand his jokes better.
We understand that you could not guarantee that we would be allowed to join, of course, but then, we cannot guarantee much about the hatching, either. This seems fair. What do you think?
Agent Ilraen
RC 999
Department of Implausible Crossovers
(( Pff, Nume will never pass the interview. I'd be surprised, anyway. Ilraen, though... what counts as formal dress if you don't normally wear clothes? )) -
A response to the response. by
on 2015-08-16 16:31:00 UTC
Link to this
To: RC 999 [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
From: Teyala Solnerii [tsolnerii.console18513hr51394713br2346.rc580.OPS]
CC: Jennifer Robinson [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
Subject: Re: Cafeteria Bulletin
Agent Ilraen,
I can agree to that! And you're right about the tabletop game; I'm both part of it and close friends with the agent who acts as the regular game master. If you pass the interview process, I'm sure he would be happy to grant you a spot at the table.
As for getting into the gathering place itself, name a good time for an introduction. We can meet at the Nursery and walk to the location from there. Dress in formal wear (or as formal as possible).
Thank you again!
Teyala Solnerri
Department of Operations - Nursery
((OOC: I think the definition of "formal" is stretched a little bit in the PPC, thanks to all the non-humans and non-humanoids running around. Also, I just found out that DO was already used in an ICEP abbreviation as opposed to OPS. Ah well; I think OPS just sounds/reads better.)) -
Agent Des is interested! by
on 2015-08-15 04:14:00 UTC
Link to this
To: RC#999 [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
From: Agent Desdendelle [0.4342944819.console.ayugiohcard]
CC: [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
Subject: Re: fire-lizards?
Agent Desdendelle here, Floaters. Fairly stable, can take care of animals (if I couldn't, I'd be covered with mini-Reaper stings and whatnot). I can offer in trade Icingdeath the scimitar (probably magical, but needs testing — I'm more of an axe person myself), Avatar Aang's uncanonical lightsaber (don't ask), an International Rescue jacket (comes in blue, orange, purple or yellow sash colours), or any combination of the above. I've also a full Jian Shang Di armory in my cupboard, but I reckon you guys aren't after guns.
Something tells me your inbox is flooded with trade offers, so I'll be holding my fingers here.
~Des -
Response by
on 2015-08-16 05:27:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Agent Desdendelle [0.4342944819.console.ayugiohcard]
From: RC #999 [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
CC: Jennifer Robinson [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
Subject: Re: fire-lizards?
Agent Desdendelle,
Greetings! We gather that you have something of a reputation as the "sane one" of your partnership, and we are interested in what you have to offer. The lightsaber in particular we feel would make a fine collection piece. What color is it, and does it bear the Avatar's name or any other identification?
We are also curious about Icingdeath. Is that THE Icingdeath of Drizzt Do'Urden (or rather a copy of it)? If so, what of its companion, Twinkle?
Agent Ilraen
RC 999
Department of Implausible Crossovers
P.S. I believe you meant "crossing my fingers." Do not worry, I have had a long struggle with idioms myself. -
A response by
on 2015-08-16 06:55:00 UTC
Link to this
To: RC #999 [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
From: Agent Desdendelle [0.4342944819.console.ayugiohcard]
CC: [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
Subject: Re: fire-lizards?
Salutations, Ilraen.
The lightsaber had less description than is right; I'm afraid the fic didn't even bother to mention its blade's colour. You can, however, play it like a guitar — not that I tried. I like my fingers where they are, thank you very much.
As to Icingdeath — it is, indeed, a copy of that Icingdeath, though due to the author's confusion it also shares some of Twinkle's attributes. As mentioned, I have not tested it, but the sapphire in its pommel seems to wink in and out of existence.
~Des
PS: There you go, that's ESL for you. The equivalent expression in Hebrew is indeed להחזיק אצבעות, to hold one's fingers. -
((Tell me you've done what I think you did.)) by
on 2015-08-15 07:38:00 UTC
Link to this
((Tell me Des's ICEP address reads right-to-left deliberately. Please.))
((hS)) -
((I'd like to...)) by
on 2015-08-15 09:35:00 UTC
Link to this
((But that would be lying.))
-
((You should lie, then. ^_^)) by
on 2015-08-15 12:34:00 UTC
Link to this
((Agent!Des's standard format ICEP address would be:
[ayugiohcard.console5q32458jdfsg0943.rc0.4342944819.DF]
((With the gibberish after 'console' being replaced by your own choice, of course. The non-standard format might indicate that his RC is in an unusual location, or might just be a quirk, or... eh, who knows? It's the PPC, we defy standards.))
((hS)) -
((I'd reckon...)) by
on 2015-08-15 13:24:00 UTC
Link to this
((That Des saw the gibberish, decided it's too much and tinkered with it. And the backwards is because it makes more sense to him.))
-
Here's the trade from Za'kiir and Natalie: by
on 2015-08-14 22:23:00 UTC
Link to this
A magical unicorn horn that can detect poisons
A book guide on the ancient dovahzul (dragon-tongue) language
…And yeah. I know I probably won't get them, but I'm happy to try at least. Good luck to everyone! -
Well... by
on 2015-08-16 05:14:00 UTC
Link to this
At the moment, assuming hS is cool with a clutch-size of twelve eggs, there are just about enough to go around. I'm not gonna give them to anyone who doesn't play in-character, though, so you might wanna have your people contact my people before too long. {= )
~Neshomeh -
Oh, yes, 12 is fune. ^_^ (nm) by
on 2015-08-16 13:39:00 UTC
Link to this
-
Guess I know what I'm writing tomorrow morning, then! (nm) by
on 2015-08-16 05:48:00 UTC
Link to this
-
Salutations. by
on 2015-08-14 20:06:00 UTC
Link to this
My name is Bosh'Guk. I am a Stonemaul ogre of Azeroth and an agent of the Department of Mary Sues, and I would like to request thatjoisdndsfgsdajbdas YOU HAVE FIRE LIZARDS GIMME ONEjdiosjfjdsfhd
...my apologies. My other head keeps trying to change the contents of this message, and jhdisuhduysafdasd I PROMISE TO LOVE THEM FOREVER diksydhyhavsfuy
Again, sorry. We have adequate living conditions for heat-based reptiles such as them, and experience with full-size dragons from our time in duhsuiDgauXdYfawuOd I WANT TO NAME ONE BURNIE dhsuidtatyecUTWFGFhxb
Anyway, I have knowledge of fire-immunity spells, so this will not be an issue. In trade, we have a number of various potions, enchantments, tomes of spells, and hfsuiegf FISH. WE HAVE LOTS OF FISH. I THINK IT'S CALLED GUNGAN CULTURE
Look, sorry about all that, he won't let me delete what's been written... Just send us a message at RC 417 and I'll make sure you're communicating with a competent individual.
-Bosh (AND GUK) -
Re: Salutations. by
on 2015-08-15 19:25:00 UTC
Link to this
From: Jennifer Robinson
To: Agent Bosh'Guk
CC: RC #999
Subject: Re: Salutations
Agent Bosh'Guk,
I'm afraid I have some concerns about your ability to Impress given your unique circumstances. While I don't doubt that both of you have the best intentions, there has never been a situation where a fire-lizard has Impressed to two personalities before. This is pure speculation on my part, but it seems likely that it would only bond with one of you. In the worst-case scenario, the hatchling could become confused or frightened and vanish forever, and this is what troubles me.
Assuming the boys in RC 999 find your trade agreeable, I think we should let you try it, but only if Guk can be very, very calm for the hatching. Any outbursts or sudden movements could jeopardize the Impression, so it's very important. What do you think?
~Jenni Robinson
Section 31, Room C-14
Department of Fictional Psychology
(( The PPC makes everything more interesting, doesn't it? *g* )) -
this is guk by
on 2015-08-16 03:31:00 UTC
Link to this
hi. bosh made me promise to be very, very good. i won't try to hug them or make loud noises until the bond thing is complete, promise.
Bosh here. I'm actually surprised, because Guk actually agreed to be civil for once! Just in case, I have a sleeping spell handy, but judging from the effort Guk has been making, I don't think I'll need it. Perhaps this means more to him than I thought - he never focuses like this unless something is of great importance to him. I do not know much about the Impressions common to the species in question, but I agree that it's logical that it would bond to only one of us... this could be an issue, and I'll have to discuss it with my counterpart if our offer is of interest. Guk wants to add something - the next section is his.
hi again. do these lizards sometimes have more than one head? i think that would be nice. both of us would be able to have our very own lizard friend that way. plus we would know how to feed it and what it's like for burnie. i wonder if he would argue with his other head too?
Bosh again. Thanks for your time. I'll do some research into the process of Impression - perhaps some answers could be found, even if we are not to be the owners of these creatures.
((This is quite interesting to think about. How WOULD that work, anyhow? I do love fleshing out both heads though. 'tis fun!)) -
To whom it may concern: by
on 2015-08-14 19:49:00 UTC
Link to this
I am obliged to inform you of a request for one of your eggs from my associate, Wobbles the Clown. As you may or may not be aware, Wobbles is a television presenter and friend to all children, however violent, dull-witted, or sticky. Upon hearing of your advertisement, she was filled with joy at the prospect of having a "real-life Puff the Magic Dragon" to act as a pet on her delightful program. When considering this request, I urge you not only to think of the love she can give it, but also how loved it will be by all the little children of the Nursery, her colleagues in the A/V Division and NutMint, and everyone with whom she works.
Payment will be provided in the form of all paperwork, Stores requests, and similar unpleasantnesses being comprehensively expedited for one calendar year as of the date of the transaction. Additionally, compromising photographs of LOs of your choice will be made available from the A/V Division's aborted "Canons After Dark" program (please see attached file for a comprehensive list of canon characters).
Finally, to preemptively answer the question of why my colleague has not contacted you directly, her condition (acute arcane technometaplasia) prevents her from operating anything more mechanically complex than a buttonhole flower that squirts water at the unwary. It therefore falls to me to act as a go-between. Thank you for reading.
Yours in good faith,
Barney Bradstow-Chapman,
Director of Children's Programming, A/V Division.
---
"Uh, Grody Ski? Why're you sending them that?"
The Notary turned and smirked at her colleague. "Well, they're hardly likely to give me a dragon just because I require a new document shredder, human. Indeed, they'd more than likely spit in my face as soon as I asked. I do have a reputation, after all." -
Re: To whom it may concern: by
on 2015-08-16 05:03:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Agent Bradstow-Chapman
From: RC #999 [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
CC: RC #1875, Jennifer Robinson [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
Subject: Re:
Agent Bradstow-Chapman,
Thank you for your message on behalf of Agent Wobbles. We quite understand that her circumstances prevent her from communicating directly in this medium; it is not a problem.
Do we understand correctly that her half of the deal would, in fact, be carried out by her partner the Notary, who gifted Agent Supernumerary with a rather hefty guide to requisitions on the event of his tenth anniversary? We do not object to this arrangement provided that the Notary agrees to it, but we would like to hear from her to ensure that there is no confusion. We also have one further condition: that no pictures of any LOs be sent to this RC in any form, ever.
Please let us know if that is agreeable.
Agent Ilraen
RC 999
Department of Implausible Crossovers
(( Did she really think they wouldn't find something a little odd about that offer? ^_~
Is Barney Bradstow-Chapman a real person the Notary is impersonating, or he an invention of hers? )) -
Thank you for your prompt response. by
on 2015-08-16 12:25:00 UTC
Link to this
Dear Agent Ilraen,
There is no doubt in my mind that the Notary would be amenable to such an arrangement; indeed, she was the one who suggested it. She felt, and Wobbles concurred, that a more tangible benefit would be agreeable to you, rather than the miscellany of Suvian gimcracks that people are on record as offering in similar situations, which has nothing whatsoever to do with the fact that they declined to swipe anything from their previous missions, with the exception of a Suvian AAT-mutated combat toaster currently being studied by our mutual friends in. I agree with the Notary, for my part -- something I'm given to understand happens rather rarely. I'll ding her presently
Thank you for reading,
Barney Bradstow-Chapman,
Director of Children's Programming, A/V Division.
---
To: Agent Ilraen-Aroline-Fothergill, DIC
From: Spinel Promotor Notary, Continuity Council of Gallifrey-In-Exile [rassilonssaggylefttesticleanyonebuther.console2A5B9C05A1E1.rc1875.DF]
CC: Jennifer Robinson [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
Agent Ilraen-Aroline-Fothergill
I am given to understand that you have considered my offer and not found it wanting. This is well. I do not personally believe that the accumulated gimcracks of a career in canon maintenance is acceptable as trade goods for a living being, but I understand that I am very much in the minority here, with my colleague in the majority. She wanted to give Agent Supernumerary and his children, if any, a guest spot on her program; I managed to dissuade her. I will assume a note of thanks is in the post.
To clarify my basic position in this matter, I am willing to correct clerical errors, expedite them, make sure they are read, offer assistance in bureaucratic preferred styles and the navigation of the PPC's comparatively simplistic filing system, and ensure that any and all censures are delayed, held back, sent to the wrong subcommittee, sent to the right subcommittee from the wrong supracommittee, lost, found, lost again, and buried in a peat bog for nine months. Do forgive my lapse into human media for that reference; the clown has been on at me to engage more readily with "World One" culture, and I am deathly afraid that some of the mud thrown at my proverbial wall is beginning to stick. This will last for one calendar year as of the transaction. A full list of services is available in the attached file marked 15-B.
Finally, I am extremely gratified to be remembered by yourself and your partner. People very rarely see the benefit of properly-completed paperwork, and I hope that the guide was of as much benefit to you as I intended.
I remain,
Yr. obdt. svt.,
Antrilovorasilendar (the Notary),
Spinel Promotor of the Continuity Council of Gallifrey-In-Exile,
Agent, Department of Floaters,
Sane for official purposes (aggressive personality disorder and depression noted but within one standard deviation of good health, full details of FicPsych report for both her and Agent Wobbles available in attached file XV-)
---
((He's entirely real, despite his... apposite name. However, it's not him doing it; the Notary is merely au fait with his style and is capable of mimicking it. Did you really think she's not capable of making an ICEP message look like it came from somewhere else? ^_~
Also, this is part of the backup plan. It makes her seem slightly less monstrous if she was offering to do it for her partner, but afraid that her reputation might cause her (quite rightly) to be ignored. Would anyone believe her if she said right off the bat that she was doing it for Wobbles? Of course not. However, if you reframe the conversation thus, her reputation works to her advantage. The only snag is that she'll have to bring the clown along to the Impression.
Finally, convert the alphanumeric string in the Notary's console string from base-16 to base-36. I don't think you'll be disappointed. =] )) -
((Also, for the sake of clarification:)) by
on 2015-08-16 12:43:00 UTC
Link to this
I refrained from using the Notary's address as listed on the ICEP page, partly because I forgot it was there, but mostly because it wasn't me that cooked it up - it was hS. No disrespect to him, but her TARDIS is exactly the wrong place for the RC's console to be - what with it being actively dangerous for the RC's other occupant to so much as come near it. I've amended the Wiki accordingly. =]
-
In fairness... by
on 2015-08-16 13:39:00 UTC
Link to this
... at the time her ICEP address was written, she was a prospective agent who didn't have an RC.
hS -
... Oh yeah. Forgot about that. by
on 2015-08-16 14:15:00 UTC
Link to this
Kept thinking it had been cooked up after her first mission, but of course that was not the case. I apologise for the error. =]
-
((*our mutual friends in DoSAT.)) by
on 2015-08-16 12:27:00 UTC
Link to this
For hell's sake, Cassie, this is why we proofread...
-
Re: Da Bulletin by
on 2015-08-14 19:44:00 UTC
Link to this
To: RC#999 [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
From: Agent Barid [datroll.console773945eb097374bt19873.rc1986.APD]
CC: [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
Subject: Re: Da Bulletin
Hiya. Dis is Barid. Ya remember me from dat time we went ta Azeroth an' had dat adventure? Dat was great. I was handin' out fliers at the cafeteria an' I saw dis paper on da board. I t'ought ta myself, "Barid, ya love fire an' ya more or less indiff'rent ta lizards, so dats a net positive!" So, can I get one'a dem fire tings? I got a mess'a shrunk heads and assorted jujus, fetishes, an' potions. Whatta ya say?
-Barid -
Oh, Barid. by
on 2015-08-15 14:54:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Agent Barid [datroll.console773945eb097374bt19873.rc1986.APD]
From: RC #999 [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
CC: Jennifer Robinson [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
Subject: Re: Re: Da Bulletin
You've got to be kidding. This is a joke, right?
Listen up, you blue loony: "dat adventure" was not great. We don't want your junk. You don't even know what a fire-lizard is! So no. We say no.
And also, heartfelt from me personally, go to hell.
— Agent Supernumerary
RC 999
Department of Implausible Crossovers
To: Agent Barid [datroll.console773945eb097374bt19873.rc1986.APD]
From: Agent Ilraen-Aroline-Fothergill [ilraen.console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
Subject: Sorry.
Agent Barid,
I apologize for my partner's rude message. I told him I would handle all correspondence regarding this matter, but he got to the console before I could.
Agent Ilraen
RC 999
Department of Implausible Crossovers
To: Agent Barid [datroll.console773945eb097374bt19873.rc1986.APD]
From: Jennifer Robinson [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
CC: RC #999 [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Da Bulletin
Good grief, Nume. That was completely unnecessary.
Ahem. Barid, I must confess I am concerned about your motives for Impressing a fire-lizard. For one thing, they don't breathe fire except under certain conditions, and we're going to be taking steps to ensure that said conditions cannot be met here in HQ, since we don't want anyone fined, arrested, etc. Furthermore, fire-lizards can be quite a handful without proper training, and that takes patience and dedication. You're rather busy with your group, not to mention missions. Are you sure you can provide the sort of care that these sensitive creatures need?
~Jenni Robinson
Section 31, C-14
Department of Fictional Psychology -
Dat Paper by
on 2015-08-17 16:35:00 UTC
Link to this
To: RC #999 [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
From: [ebrightbeard.console773945eb097374bt19873.rc1986.APD]
CC: Jennifer Robinson [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
Subject: Dat Paper
Hey dere. I'm dat Dwarf dat ya know and kinda like, I tink. I hear ya got some kind'a lizard dat breathes fire. Bein' a Dwarf, my beard is probably fire proof. Can I get one'a dem? Um...lad?
-Totally Da Dwarf
-------------------------------
To: RC #999 [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
From: [ebrightbeard.console773945eb097374bt19873.rc1986.APD]
CC: Jennifer Robinson [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
Subject: Please ignore previous message
I apologize for my uncouth partner. I'm lucky that I check my messages regularly and that he forgot to log out of my account after trying to game the system, as it were. I assure you, I will find some creative way to make his life difficult for as long as it takes for him to learn his lesson.
However, I am also interested in your offer. Though my beard is not in fact fire-proof, I do take measures to make it fire-resistant when working the forge. Which brings me to my trade offer; I can make for you all manner of metal implements. I recall that neither of you are particularly fond of combat, so likely won't want arms and armor. However, I can supply you with tools and various other things if given good references and schematics.
I will also keep my partner as far away from you all as is possible, free of charge.
Humbly,
Eamon Brightbeard, Knight of the Rubber Pocketknife -
Same as DF; if there are enough, I'd like one. by
on 2015-08-14 19:32:00 UTC
Link to this
Would it be okay if Agents Alleb and Jesse got one? I haven't introduced them yet, but I think they'd like it. I don't know anything about Pern, though...
For trade, Jesse has a Civil War shotgun, and Alleb has two well-crafted daggers from her home continuum. They also have some money to augment their items. -
In-character: by
on 2015-08-14 21:16:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Agents Supernumerary and Ilraen at RC 999, [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
and
Nurse Jennifer Robinson at [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
From: Agents Alleb and Jesse.
Greetings,
My name is Agent Alleb, of the Realm. My partner, Jesse, and I would like to inquire of these "fire-lizards." Neither of us have experience with them, but in Alleble I often tended our Blue Dragons, which are big enough to ride.
For trade, I have two masterful daggers, crafted by Naysmithe himself. Each blade is engraved with Pennath Ador, the Mountain of Glory. One alone should suffice as payment. My partner also offers his shotgun, which he says is from his country's Civil War.
Never alone,
Alleb. -
Response by
on 2015-08-16 04:45:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Agents Alleb and Jesse
From: RC #999 [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
CC: Jennifer Robinson [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
Subject: Re:
Agent Alleb,
Hello! Thank you for your interest. We are not familiar with your Realm or its dragons, but we would be interested to learn more. In turn, our friend Jenni will tell you more about fire-lizards. (I believe she is even now writing an informational pamphlet to hand out to all the prospective Impressors before the hatching takes place.)
Neither of us is much interested in combustion firearms, but I quite like the sound of the daggers you describe. We would accept one masterwork dagger per egg, one for you, one for your partner. I do not know what an equivalent value of one dagger is where you come from, but my partner says that the value of a fire-lizard is more or less akin to the value of a purebred companion animal from a reputable breeder on World One. Perhaps your partner would understand?
Please let us know if you accept this deal or if you would like to make another offer.
Agent Ilraen
RC 999
Department of Implausible Crossovers
(( Yes, I am going to write a pamphlet in Jenni's voice to help out everyone who's not very familiar with Pern. There might even be graphics if I get really invested. ^_^ )) -
A Reply by
on 2015-08-16 23:58:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Agent Ilraen at RC 999, [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
and
Nurse Jennifer Robinson at [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
From: Agents Alleb and Jesse.
Agent Ilraen,
((Before I begin, I'm afraid I must give a small disclaimer. I don't own the physical books that detail Alleb's home universe. I have them in audiobook format, so I can't search for information. The books have a wiki, but it's not detailed. Therefore, disclaimer: Everything I say about the Realm's dragons ought to be taken with a grain of salt.))
The Realm's dragons are, from what I know of other dragons, fairly standard. The Blues I tended were used by messengers, and known for their speed and stamina. Their roars are very loud, their fire hot, and their wings wide. Some of them are quite temperamental, and I think my experiences with them have prepared me for anything a fire-lizard might do.
I am afraid that my partner is as unsure of the items as I am. He does not know the value of my daggers in your modern currency, and as to "purebred companion animals," well, here is what he said:
"I don't rightly know what she* means. Any dog's a good dog so long as it earns its keep."
The price of the daggers is... somewhat hard to place. They were made as a favor to my uncle, and given to me as a gift, so I do not know how much gold they might be sold for. But, if I understand rightly, I believe the deal is fair. Jesse says he doesn't want a fire-lizard for himself, so only one dagger need be bartered.
A pamphlet would be lovely,
Agent Alleb.
((*I know Ilraen is male, but Jesse's just arrived from the Civil War, and the name sounds feminine to him. That's also why he's useless with the money exchange; he's still freaking out about how much a bag of flour costs.)) -
Hmm... by
on 2015-08-14 18:50:00 UTC
Link to this
On the one hand, fire-lizards! Guess whose D&D wizard had a gold dragonling familiar named Kimi? But that's beside the point.
On the other hand, my agents (maybe Zeb?) would love a fire-lizard, but on the other, there's some stuff coming up that might make taking care of their present minis difficult enough as it isand they're already speshul snowflakes as it is they don't need more shinies. Might have to think on this one.
...O-o-or, Alex Dives might request one. :) -
Oh, and as for trade: by
on 2015-08-14 19:18:00 UTC
Link to this
Alex has a couple of pieces of Sue-tech he'd be willing to trade, such as a freeze gun he dismantled and put back together so it was less likely to fall apart, and I'm sure he's got a tricorder waiting for repairs as well. He'd be willing to clean that up and hand it over.
-
...Wait, I'm supposed to do this in-character, right? by
on 2015-08-14 19:32:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Supernumerary and Ilraen-Aroline-Fothergill (console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC)
Cc: Nurse Jenni (jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH)
From: Alex Dives (adives.console050102ky332761.rc007.DOSAT)
Subject: Inquiry about fire-lizards
I saw your notice in the Cafeteria and I'm definitely interested! I'm an intern with DoSAT and have pretty regular hours, so hopefully that's good enough for you!
I have red the original Dragonriders of Pern trilogy as well as the Harper Hall trilogy, so I also know a fair bit about fire-lizards and how to care for them.
In return, I can offer up some bits of Sue tech rescued from the field: I have an extra laser spanner that needs fixing up (unfortunately, it shines blellow at the moment; I'm trying to fix it, but if I can't, I hope that isn't a problem), a freeze gun that encases the target in a block of ice for several minutes (it leaves no permanent or lasting damage, as far as I can tell), and a tricorder that's a little bit beat up, but I can get to work on fixing that up if that's what you're interested in.
Thanks for your time! -
Re: Inquiry by
on 2015-08-15 15:10:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Alex Dives [adives.console050102ky332761.rc007.DOSAT]
CC: Nurse Jenni [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
From: Supernumerary and Ilraen-Aroline-Fothergill [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
Subject: Re: Inquiry about fire-lizards
Agent Dives,
Hello! You are the brother of Rina Dives, is that correct? It is very nice to hear from you.
Your trade is exactly the sort of thing we were hoping for. We would be happy to accept the tricorder if it can be repaired, or the tricorder plus laser spanner if one or both are in less than optimal condition. We hope you find this agreeable.
We will be in touch about the hatching. Good luck!
Agent Ilraen
RC 999
Department of Implausible Crossovers -
Re: Inquiry by
on 2015-08-15 15:18:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Supernumerary and Ilraen-Aroline-Fothergill [console349376sn2066720bc102875.rc999.DIC]
CC: Nurse Jenni [jrobinson.console3114ps94394fp42865.rcC-14.FICPSYCH]
From: Alex Dives [adives.console050102ky332761.rc007.DOSAT]
Subject: Re: Inquiry about fire-lizards
Yes, I am, actually! She's where I get most of my tech from, as a matter of fact. Otherwise I'd be sitting around all day repairing broken CADs and waiting for the techies to order me to get them more coffee, ha ha. The Sue tech makes for nice side projects in my free time.
I'll get to work right away on repairing the tricorder! And no worries, the laser spanner is in perfect condition... you know, other than the blellow thing.
Wow, I can't wait for the hatching! I really don't mind what color fire-lizard I get, since they're all pretty cool in my opinion.
Thank you very much! -
Re: Inquiry by
on 2015-08-16 18:10:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Alex Dives
From: Ilraen-Aroline-Fothergill
Subject: Re: Re: Inquiry about fire-lizards
Agent Dives (or may I call you Alex?),
Excellent! How is Rina? I have not seen much of her since our co-mission.
To clarify, a working tricorder alone is a sufficient trade, though we will not refuse the laser spanner if you are trying to get rid of it. By the way, what model is the tricorder? A TOS model would be particularly prized by my partner, though of course later models are technically superior.
Speaking of which, I wonder if you might like to take a look at a project of mine. I have long been striving to understand the inner workings of a CAD well enough to repair our old one, but I find that I do not quite have the aptitude for engineering that I hoped—the ideal Andalite, you see, is both a warrior and a scientist, and I imagined that this could be my science. Alas, it is not. I could use a set of experienced eyes that will not judge my ineptitude too harshly.
- Ilraen -
Re: Inquiry by
on 2015-08-16 19:31:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Ilraen-Aroline-Fothergill
From: Alex Dives
Subject: Re: Re: Inquiry about fire-lizards
Rina's been... doing alright, I suppose. She's been kind of cranky the last few times I've seen her, but otherwise the same as ever.
And alright, good to know! In answer to your question, yes, it is a TOS model; apparently some Sue decided to shove Nurse Chapel down a plothole and take over so she could impress Bones.
As for the project, sure thing! I'd love to swing by in the evening sometime! Just let me know whenever works for you. -
Re: Inquiry by
on 2015-08-17 02:14:00 UTC
Link to this
To: Ilraen-Aroline-Fothergill
From: Alex Dives
Cc: Jennifer Robinson
Subject: Re: Re: Inquiry about fire-lizards
Um... listen, I don't know if this is a good time to ask or not, considering what happened, but... am I still a candidate for the egg? I don't know how a negative emotional state would impact the Impression. I do still really want a fire-lizard, but... I don't know if I'll still be allowed...
Sorry to bother you. -
(( Haven't finished reading LMM yet. )) by
on 2015-08-17 17:19:00 UTC
Link to this
Therefore, an OOC answer: I figure there are a good three or four weeks between the boys posting their notice and the actual hatching, in-universe, so Alex should have enough time to get his head on straight.
IRL, the hatching RP will probably start whenever I get my next day off. I don't plan to run it in real time, because people are in different time zones and have lives, but I'd still like to have lots of freedom to play at the start. {= )
~Neshomeh -
Well by
on 2015-08-14 18:30:00 UTC
Link to this
Perhaps Anne could adopt one? She's able to be in multiple places at once so it wouldn't be that hard for her to keep an eye on one. Though I don't know too much about Pern...
-
Have her make an offer. {= ) by
on 2015-08-14 18:42:00 UTC
Link to this
Nume and Ilraen aren't giving them away for free. Plus, I don't know who Anne is and she's not on the wiki, so a little ICEP correspondence between her and my agents would help fix that.
That said, the idea of someone named Anne with a fire-lizard tickles my fancy already. ^_^
~Neshomeh, trying to foster some agent interactions. -
You're only giving away two? by
on 2015-08-14 18:26:00 UTC
Link to this
I thought Dragonsong established clutch size as double-figures, though that may have been retconned later...
I'll not be asking for any unless you don't get offers. ^_~ I'm not sure who I'd give one to, anyway.
hS, also getting nostalgic fuzzies over this one -
Dafydd only gave them two, didn't he? by
on 2015-08-14 18:31:00 UTC
Link to this
Or did I massively misunderstand something? I'd be perfectly happy to expand the event, in that case. {= D
~Neshomeh -
Huh. So he did. Let me ficlet. by
on 2015-08-14 20:46:00 UTC
Link to this
"You only gave them two?"
Dafydd stepped back from his new doors and frowned at his wife. "Yes? Plus the Magnetonic Pressure Oven, of course."
Constance seemed to be on the verge of waving her arms about in distress. "And what are we going to do with the rest?" she demanded. "I hope you're not planning on keeping them!"
"Two fire lizards in the house is enough for me," Dafydd assured her. "I thought we'd... you know, do what we always do? Drop them off on a beach somewhere over on Pern?"
Constance reached up to stroke the gold fire lizard perched on her shoulder. "You know how much that always upsets Hera, though."
"And Ilwion always settled her down again." Dafydd cocked his head. "There's something else, isn't there?"
Constance's lip twisted. "Tanfin's been asking for one of the eggs."
"So we tell him he can't. I don't really see the-"
"I did tell him he can't." Constance scowled. "I told him he can't, because we're sending them to the PPC."
"... ah." Dafydd reached out and drummed his fingers on the carving of Smaug on the doors. "We could lie?"
"He's far too good at seeing through us." Constance threw out a quick grin. "Takes after his father..."
"I dunno, you always caught onto my fibs pretty quickly."
"Past tense?"
"Shh." Dafydd considered the situation. "So... what do we do?"
"Simple." Constance pointed at the hidden door to the technology-filled basement. "Get back on the line to the horse-dude and tell him he can have the lot."
"And what if he doesn't-?"
"Correction: tell him he's having the lot, whether he wants them or not."
Better? ^_^
hS -
Well then! by
on 2015-08-15 02:27:00 UTC
Link to this
It seems that in canon, wild gold clutch sizes ranged from 21 to over 50 (though the latter may have been retconned in later books).
Even 20 seems like rather a lot for HQ. In the wild, you'd want a large clutch to overcome the high mortality rate seen when Menolly Impressed, but perhaps Hera has gotten the idea that this isn't necessary? Or, with just Ilwion around to fly her, maybe her flights simply aren't all that energetic. What about 12? That way we'd be looking at about five greens, three blues, two browns, a bronze, and (maybe) a gold.
~Neshomeh -
Are there grey ones? by
on 2015-08-15 02:59:00 UTC
Link to this
Because Notary wants a grey one. Beige would also be acceptable. =]
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There are not. by
on 2015-08-15 03:10:00 UTC
Link to this
Not in canon, anyway. I certainly never ran an AU Weyr with off-canon colors such as gray. Nope. >.>
But yeah, no. This will be a canonical clutch. She might get a pale blue or light-tan brown, perhaps. Assuming my agents don't turn her away at the door for deceiving them, of course. ^_~
~Neshomeh -
Which is why she brings Wobbles too. by
on 2015-08-15 11:04:00 UTC
Link to this
After all, Wobbles is exactly the kind of person who'd bring along her slightly utterly-terrible roomie to a thing where she's the star of the show and gets a new
Cute Animal Friendfire lizard to play with. That... really is. Hm. God alone knows what colour a Wobbles-themed dragon would turn out to be if left up to her, though, so I think we can all be thankful this is a canonical batch of dragon eggs.
Also, having everyone's favourite complete bitch turn up to the meeting wearing a chef's hat and holding a skillet and camping stove would be a good idea. How d'you like your eggs an' so on. =] -
Sorry, no greys. by
on 2015-08-15 03:09:00 UTC
Link to this
Closest natural thing we've seen was the white Ruth, and he was an exception to the normal green-blue-brown-bronze-gold colorings of dragons. We've never seen any deviance in color in fire-lizards, as far as I know.
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If you do, then I'd love to have an agent end up with one. by
on 2015-08-14 19:18:00 UTC
Link to this
I haven't yet figured out who--probably Edgar or Agent____t, really--but I have such fond memories of that series.
I think I'll wait to hear if there'll be more than two eggs, and think about who would do best with one of them while I do that. Let's see what happens.
~DF
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New mission! by
on 2015-08-15 01:07:00 UTC
Link to this
Four agents don mutant disguise for a Twilight x X-Men mission that will break their brains--and call on their acting skills.
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A what?? by
on 2015-08-16 15:35:00 UTC
Link to this
Yes, I know best pony has nothing to do with the X-Men or sparklepires. No, I don't care.
Great work, y'all! The parts with them getting used to their new powers were the best. And the part where Rina goes improvised-flamethrower-crazy but in a good way. (Also, I can't be the only person who read "...wings suddenly snapping open again when she got a look at what the Reader was wearing." and instantly thought "Wingboner". Well done, you two.)
LOL @ the "In Pinchy We Trust" coin. Either of you ever consider doing a pony mission in the future?
What's a "wated"? Is that some new variety of mini-Tribble? -
Thanks :) by
on 2015-08-20 20:02:00 UTC
Link to this
Late-ish response, but still.
I've thought of doing a ponies mission, although it'd have to be either a cowrite or done with a consultant--I've seen all of, oh, one episode ever. I do, however, want to see Kozar as a pony--or Dawn, or both, aaah--and watching agents flail around in a continuum they don't know (crossed with one they do know, if they're DIC) sounds like a lot of fun. I don't currently have a candidate, though.
As for the wated, to add to what Scape said: it seems to act rather a lot like a tribble in that it shrieks at Klingons. As it looks like a (black, I think?) tribble with fangs...Klingons react to it in much the same way as they do to tribbles, at least going by Kozar. -
In answer to your last question: by
on 2015-08-16 15:47:00 UTC
Link to this
Er... pass.
Rina and Zeb adopted the wated from their Rose Potter mission (part 5, if memory serves); beyond it being a small furry thing that likes to eat paper, we know very little about this strangely adorable spelling error. =] -
Re: New mission! by
on 2015-08-16 05:22:00 UTC
Link to this
Should I play Taps?
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Um. by
on 2015-08-16 06:15:00 UTC
Link to this
Why? Not that I object to bugle music or anything, but I can't figure out why the military 'extinguish lights' call--also played at *funerals*--would fit here.
(And yes, the fact that I looked that up is what's keeping this post from simply reading, 'huh? Explain, please?' Although, to be fair, all over done is find out more detail to go 'huh?' about.)
On another note, if you actually know how to play a bugle IRL, that's really cool.
~DF -
Re: Um. by
on 2015-08-16 17:06:00 UTC
Link to this
Because this missions sounds deadly. A TwilightxX-Men crossover? Brrr...
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So you didn't even read it? by
on 2015-08-16 23:56:00 UTC
Link to this
Taking part in the community means more than just making random posts that don't really mean anything. It comes off as being a little attention-seeking.
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Re: So you didn't even read it? by
on 2015-08-17 03:20:00 UTC
Link to this
And I'll help out at the Wiki.
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The Wiki isn't as important as... by
on 2015-08-17 03:40:00 UTC
Link to this
...being a member of the community. Hang out, chat, get to know people. Show genuine interest rather than posting random things.
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Re: So you didn't even read it? by
on 2015-08-17 03:14:00 UTC
Link to this
Sorry, I'm still no good at socialization. I'll read it right now.
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... Eh? by
on 2015-08-18 00:12:00 UTC
Link to this
It's not a question of socialization. If you're not reading the missions you're commenting on, why are you commenting on them? I'm not having a go at you, I'm just genuinely confused.
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Re: ... Eh? by
on 2015-08-18 20:28:00 UTC
Link to this
It's just that I'm not used to socializing so I don't know what's appropriate or not.
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To be fair, people sometimes comment... by
on 2015-08-18 16:05:00 UTC
Link to this
...before they've read the missions or before they've read much of them, and then comment again once they've finished reading. But yeah, no, generally it is considered logical and polite to at least have the intention of reading the mission (unless you're joining a side discussion that's sprung up in the same thread, that happens here and there). I hadn't realized you (N. Harmonik) hadn't read it, which was why I was confused--this was an earlier mission. It actually takes place some weeks or a month after Cale Seche. If anything, I would have expected a comment about playing Taps on the LMM/Picking Up the Pieces combo, considering what happens there, and it's so exciting to be able to say that now, because it's no longer spoilers :D
~DF -
And the above would be from me. /sigh Check all fields, kids (nm by
on 2015-08-18 16:06:00 UTC
Link to this
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Good mission. by
on 2015-08-15 20:40:00 UTC
Link to this
I was able to follow everything (though the first mention of "Wardo" did throw me off for a while before I made the connection), and there were not very many errors. But errors there were:
1) This is not the animated series, she doesn’t permanently absorb powers in the movies!
That comma should be a semicolon.
2) Before Kozar could reply the narrative continued from Edward’s point of view, giving the agents a description of the Sue
A comma is needed after "Before Kozar could reply".
3) She made for the door, a quiet figure in dark pants and a green t-shirt which were none the worse for wear after their adventure as a leather catsuit.
Misplaced modifier: as written, the door is what is clothed.
Also, two questions
a) What exactly did Rina say to piss Kozar off so badly?
b) Are you suggesting that the Reader has the hots for Rina? If so, that seems quite quick, especially since all the Reader did was try to maintain her balance by grabbing onto the nearest possible handhold, which happened to be mutant!Rina's wings. -
Fixed the mistakes. by
on 2015-08-15 21:19:00 UTC
Link to this
a) It's a Klingon insult that doesn't have a translation, but it's implied to be extremely vulgar and insulting. So... an F-you on linguistic steroids? The fact that she muttered it makes it even more insulting (at least in Klingon culture).
b) ...that's actually the other way around. Rina had more of an "Oh my god she's hot" moment than anything, and the Reader had to pretty quickly dissuade her. Is... that not clear? -
It seems that I completely misread that. by
on 2015-08-19 03:28:00 UTC
Link to this
Reading it again, I see that what you said was clear. Apparently Rina's mutant disguise does have something in common with MLP pegasi, if fanon is to be believed...
-
On povs and point-of-view tags by
on 2015-08-15 16:52:00 UTC
Link to this
I'm starting to get confused about the povs. I originally thought that they were sorta related to the bads, in that they're creatures spawned from misspellings. But why did "Rogue's POV" create a pov in this mission?
IIRC, originally povs were created because the badfic writer wrote "pov", all lowercase. And I understand how, in a previous mission (I believe it was a SkarmorySilver cowrite), a pov was created when the writer wrote "[name] POV", no possessive.But what's the deal here?
And on a broader note, how should one mark a change in point of view? -
Well, one shouldnÂ’t. by
on 2015-08-15 19:21:00 UTC
Link to this
Of course there should be some scene divider, or a new chapter, but point-of-view tags are offending.
Supposed I showed the readers Mafalda Hopkirk sitting in the Trace room, watching the Trace report of the Battle of the DOM and organizing counter measures. Then, after a scene divider, I show the readers Constable Bulstrode taking the elevators down to the Atrium and walking to the watchwizards security desk. Why on earth should I tell the readers that the first scene is "Hopkirk’s POV" and the second scene is "Bulstrode’s POV"?
It’s a bit trickier with First Person. For one, the tone of the narration should change, showing that another person is narrating now. Then, the readers should get clues from the narration. They hopefully still remember whom Hopkirk sent down to the Atrium in the last scene (but I may pull off a surprise by having another narrator also going down their).
So, I would put up point-of-view tags because I don’t trust my reader’s ability to understand what’s going on there in plain sight? Or because I don’t trust my ability to show what’s going on in the narrative (in which case I should continue writing to improve my skills, but I probably shouldn’t go public yet)? Or because I’m too lazy to even try? Can there be any other reason?
HG -
But there are canons that mark POV shifts by
on 2015-08-15 20:45:00 UTC
Link to this
I haven't read the ASoIaF books, but IIRC, each chapter is marked with the name of the POV character. And in the Animorphs: The Hork-Bajir Chronicles books, I believe that each chapter is also marked by the name of the POV character.
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Really? Well ... by
on 2015-08-16 09:54:00 UTC
Link to this
I don’t know about Animorphs.
George R. R. Martin certainly isn’t lazy, and having read some of his early SF, I trust him and his editors. So I’m wondering now whether it may be possible to experience ASoIaF in different ways, like following one characters story reading only their chapters and then going back to follow another character, versus reading everything chapter by chapter.
The answer to your question "how should one mark a change in point of view?" may be: do it like Martin, but don’t if he wouldn’t.
HG -
The chapters are, yes. by
on 2015-08-15 21:08:00 UTC
Link to this
But finding a giant "X POV" in the middle of a paragraph is extremely jarring, not to mention obnoxious.
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XPOV: Enemy Unsnrf. by
on 2015-08-15 22:03:00 UTC
Link to this
I'm not even a little bit sorry. =]
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In addition: by
on 2015-08-15 20:13:00 UTC
Link to this
They're there because it's funny. Povs are little skittery scuttly fluffy things that hide on top of a canon's head. They go snrf. Big POVs are similar; however, they just hide behind the canon in question. Or rather, since they're about the size of a steroidal wildebeest (though most of it is floof, like a giant angora rabbit), they TRY to hide behind them. I find this funny. YMMV. =]
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Nice, and some typo spotting. by
on 2015-08-15 11:15:00 UTC
Link to this
Laughed a lot when Rina discovered she could punch walls without getting hurt and gleefully continued punching.
"“What’s the matter with me? What’s the matter with you?” RIna demanded"
A mini-Agent! *catches RIna* -
*quickly deletes the mini-Agent* by
on 2015-08-15 13:02:00 UTC
Link to this
Nice catch. :D
And no I totally wouldn't go around punching walls for the heck of it just because I could, why are you looking at me like that. -
It's a Sue-pov! :D (nm) by
on 2015-08-15 07:41:00 UTC
Link to this
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I'm starting to think... by
on 2015-08-15 06:05:00 UTC
Link to this
... That Rose Potter is somewhere in Rina, and is slowly assimilating herself.
- Interesting, theory, but... by on 2015-08-15 13:03:00 UTC Link to this
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Careful... *uses a scalpel to remove an unnecessary coma* (nm) by
on 2015-08-15 16:08:00 UTC
Link to this
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Stab the unconscious! That'll learn 'em, the slackers! =] (nm) by
on 2015-08-15 22:45:00 UTC
Link to this
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Has there ever...? by
on 2015-08-15 10:00:00 UTC
Link to this
Since I'm being a bit weird with my characters I wanted to know something.
Has there ever been a hero that acts like a villain?
So, an actual hero who's supposed to save the world and acts like a villain while doing it, but still saves the world or whatever. And they aren't actually the villain all along either. They're the real 'hero'/'chosen one'/'only one who can save everyone'/ect.
Any characters are appreciated, from good to bad, from cannon to non-cannon. Maybe it's just a brief mention. -
Re: Has there ever...? by
on 2015-08-20 11:23:00 UTC
Link to this
Yeah, if you want to find more characters like this I'd suggest looking at the tropes, and sub-pages of, Anti-Hero and Well Intentioned Extremist, maybe even Anti-Villain depending on your point of view.
Also, while it's not quite what you've asked for, there are a number of times where actual villains have teamed up with the heroes of a series in order to take down a worse villain. See Rivals Team Up, Enemy Mine and Teeth Clenched Teamwork for examples of that kind of thing.
The few characters that immediately sprang to my mind were:
Sergeant Schlock, from the webcomic Schlock Mercenary (and, to a lesser extent, the rest of Tagon's Toughs). On the 'hero' side, they have saved people, planets and even had a hand in saving the galaxy one time. On the 'less-heroic' side, they usually only do that stuff because they're getting paid for it, frequently use violence as a first resort, and aren't always that concerned about collateral damage.
Their skills can generally be summed up as 'breaking people and hurting things' (or maybe the other way around), and most of them enjoy the pretty lights caused by massive explosions.
Having said that, some of them have managed some truly heroic feats when their friends were in danger. Other than that, they can be heroic, but usually only if they're getting paid to be heroic. Tagon's priorities are 1) survive in order to get paid, 2) get paid, 3) client satisfaction.
Belkar Bitterleaf, from the webcomic Order of the Stick. He is a member of an adventuring party that is one of the few groups actively trying to save the world from impending doom, but his alignment is Chaotic Evil. For the most part, he only really cares about himself (and, later on, his cat) and occasionally suggests plans for dealing with obstacles/distractions which are very efficient, but morally wrong. The rest of the party tends to stop him from actually acting on his villainous impulses though.
Amanda Waller, from the DC universe. She runs Task Force X, a.k.a. the Suicide Squad - a group of not-even-slightly-reformed supervillains that she (barely) keeps in control through the use of explosive collars.
The Squad only tends to get used against targets that are even worse than normal, or in situations where sending regular forces would just be sending them to their deaths, so she does do good, but her actions are completely illegal and immoral.
- Irish -
Renegade Shepard, Evil!Courier, And whole lots more... by
on 2015-08-15 20:48:00 UTC
Link to this
You can count any player character who can potentially act evil, even if it's not necessarily the 'canon' route. Let's take The Lone Wanderer, from Fallout 3. Essentially the chosen one in all but name, you can save the day, even if you sell fifty people into slavery, murder your way across the wastes, peddle more drugs than the Los Zetas, or just kill people so you can eat them. Sounds pretty villainous, no? The weird part is that you can just go donate a bunch of caps to a church and you'll still get the title 'Earthly Angel' or something even better sounding.
I'm not completely sure what you're asking, but it seems like you want to know if the narrative role of 'the hero' has ever been given to a far less savoury type. I've answered according to that. -
Isn't that... by
on 2015-08-15 10:13:00 UTC
Link to this
... practically the definition of 'antihero'?
hS -
Depends on the type. by
on 2015-08-15 20:54:00 UTC
Link to this
Antiheros are about the thick grey line between hero and villain. A sleazy used car salesman who would sell his own mother for a nickle is not exactly a hero, right? He's a jerk, but not really a villain. What you're talking about is known on TV Tropes as a 'Nominal Hero' AKA the person who fights on the same side as the heroes, but for completely non-heroic reasons. The Unscrupulous Hero is the type who acts like a villain, but fights for good with heroic motivations. Certainly a type of antihero, but not the only one.
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Hm... by
on 2015-08-15 10:04:00 UTC
Link to this
Is this what you're looking for?
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Not really... by
on 2015-08-15 10:14:00 UTC
Link to this
I'm thinking of something along the lines of being the actual hero who saves the day and who you follow through the story.
It's just that they end up doing things a villain might be more inclined to do, like murdering innocents on purpose. -
But then... by
on 2015-08-15 10:21:00 UTC
Link to this
Lelouch from Code Geass is an example(ish) of what I'm thinking about and he's on the Well-Intentioned Extremist list.
So I think that's good enough.
Thanks!
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Random Question About Minis by
on 2015-08-16 02:42:00 UTC
Link to this
Someone on Facebook misspelled Batman as Barman. Does that mean a mini gets spawned or no?
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Back in the day, by
on 2015-08-16 14:54:00 UTC
Link to this
the OFU authors would scour the internet for whatever random misspellings they could find to use as minis. We PPC agents, however, only get the ones we find in missions.
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No, in that case, you'd get this: by
on 2015-08-16 03:08:00 UTC
Link to this
...in all seriousness, I'm not sure. ^^;
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How good was the Galaxy Class, really? by
on 2015-08-16 19:47:00 UTC
Link to this
I mean the one from Trek, in case any other franchise happens to have a Galaxy Class.
The Galaxy Class is billed and said to be this ultra-super mega awesome starship, but it, well... Kinda seems to suck a little. To quote Tv Tropes' wallbangers page on TNG, it seems to have a glass jaw. I mean, look at how the original Enterprise fought without shields. Pretty badassly, if I do say so myself. Then, you have the Enterprise-D. (Spoilers) It got shot down by a single, outdated bird-of-prey. And, I get it, the Galaxy class likely had a lot of help from the plot when it came to sucking, like a starship version of The Worf Effect.
And this isn't just some rant. I want to know how I might portray the Galaxy Class in my fanfics (Once I recover my hard drive) and my foundry missions in STO. I don't want to be completely dismissive of the class, but I think it's a little bit past 'ideal starship' given how many they lost during the Dominion War, for instance. -
I just wanna say I love this thread. by
on 2015-08-17 22:35:00 UTC
Link to this
This is a delightfully fascinating, geeky conversation, and I really wish I could participate in it. Alas, though I have a Trekkie character, I have not quite managed to become one myself.
~Neshomeh -
What, and I am? by
on 2015-08-18 13:22:00 UTC
Link to this
I've seen four-and-a-quarter of the Star Trek movies, and... uh... maybe the same number of episodes? Everything I know, I learned by cultural assimilation and looking at the wiki. ^_^
hS -
You grasp the technobabble. by
on 2015-08-18 15:45:00 UTC
Link to this
My eyes tend to glaze over when that stuff comes up. Unless I happen to know something about the real science that tells me what I'm hearing is silly (lots of the biology/medicine in Trek good grief), I'm usually pretty happy to accept that it works because Future and not try to think about it. ^_^;
~Neshomeh -
It's very simple by
on 2015-08-18 19:03:00 UTC
Link to this
Just reverse the polarity of the neutron flow and bounce the graviton particle beam off the main deflector dish. That's the best way to make popcorn.
-Phobos, BS Engineer - Ah, yes, in the words of Voltaire. by on 2015-08-20 00:31:00 UTC Link to this
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If it makes you feel any better... by
on 2015-08-17 23:05:00 UTC
Link to this
That's why I sicced Artell on it; so I can have the discussion with someone without actually having to have it here. I'll leave everyone here to quibble with the scifi details. :>
-July -
Re: How good was the Galaxy Class, really? by
on 2015-08-16 22:37:00 UTC
Link to this
I'm not sure where or who bills the Galaxy as mega awesome, necessarily. It's not meant to be a warship, which is in many ways the whole point of the TNG part of the franchise: compared to the old Trek with Kirk indulging in green-skinned alienesses and the second movie being a submarine thriller in space, Picard is meant to be a diplomat and an explorer.
The Galaxy class does have some design peculiarities. Its remit is to
- explore space
- conduct scientific experiments
- carry out diplomatic missions
- conduct search, rescue and humanitarian operations
- patrol the edges of Federation space, and
- transport VIPs or important cargo.
This calls for a vessel that is
- moderately combat-capable
- fast
- spacious but not as spacious as a dedicated cargo ship
- passenger-capable
- able to carry non-combatants (including family members of the crew, which is a Federation ideological choice and probably a major draw to enlist capable Starfleet personnel in an economy without financial incentive) and
- self-sufficient for long missions
The Galaxy class has an incredibly broad mission profile (even too broad - why not have separate VIP transports with military escorts? but this is more to do with Starfleet design ideology and tradition which seems to favour generalist designs), and thus the ship itself needs to be very adaptive as well. It can't be a specialized warship like the Defiant (which is too small and too Spartan) or a research vessel like the Oberth (which is also too small and has no combat ability to speak of). It's flagship material for the kind of Starfleet whose mission includes things that the United States government has several separate agencies and branches for: the Navy, the Air Force, the Army, the Marine Corps, the Coast Guard, the NOAA, NASA, the State Department... the fact that the Galaxy can do all these things successfully is impressive already.
This could be thought of as author oversight, but remember that in DS9, they went out of their way to design and build a warship for the Dominion War, and inspired by this, the Sovereign class (Enterprise-E) is built to be more of a warship than the Galaxy class. Using the Galaxy in the Dominion War was like using up-armoured cars in World War 2: it would serve a purpose in a pinch but it was not anywhere as good as a purpose-built design. The fact that the Galaxy class suffered losses in the Dominion War is not meant to signal how poor the Galaxy class was as a ship as much that the Federation was unprepared and desperate enough to throw Galaxies into the fray.
And of course the Bird of Prey was able to take down the Enterprise-D in Generations: they had an inside man and they exploited a flaw in the shield systems that would have been present in ANY Federation class of ship using the same shield system (probably all of them) allowing them to score a surprise hit on the most critical of the ship (the warp core).
I'm more appalled by the tremendous design white elephant that is the saucer separation system. -
Few details wrong, but it makes no difference. by
on 2015-08-17 08:47:00 UTC
Link to this
Just letting you know, the Defiant was made to fight the Borg, not the Dominion. Though, it certainly proved it could handle both. And as for the Generations thing, Khan disabled the Enterprise's shields, as well. I get that it's even less of a warship than the Constitution class, but I still find it... odd that the much larger Galaxy class would be outclassed in both armour and hull integrity by a design over a century old. Again, this really makes no difference.
I am curious about what you mean by 'white elephant' when talking about the separation system. As in, there are so many different ways that it's a white elephant, I'm not really sure which one you meant to draw attention towards. Maintenance? Fragility? Hell, maybe the system itself was responsible for it getting shot down in the first place! More redundant systems, bigger warp core. Bigger warp core, bigger target.
I always thought that maybe the Galaxy class was made like the Titanic: Grand, comfortable, great on paper, perfectly sinkable in reality. More made to showcase the Federation's starship building talents than anything. -
Re: Few details wrong, but it makes no difference. by
on 2015-08-17 20:51:00 UTC
Link to this
Now that you mention it, it's funny how Khan used the exact same trick (use an inside source on the ship to find the magic number to kill their shields) against the original Enterprise. It's almost as if it's a massive operational security issue to make something like that possible. Doesn't the keycode actually give you control over ALL of the victim ship's systems, to boot? Why would you ever design something like that?
(My bad on the Defiant raison d'etre.)
As for the separation system, imagine the discussion at Utopia Planitia Shipyards.
ENGINEER: "The saucer section will be detachable and capable of autonomous operation and thus all critical systems need to be redundant on both vessels per existing specs. If separation is deemed necessary in an emergency, all non-combat personnel will be evacuated into the saucer section and the saucer and neck prepared for detachment by engineering crews. We estimate that this procedure will take 50 minutes if done properly and as low as 20 minutes if done as a crash procedure."
ADMIRAL: "So you would say this would be a way to react to the slowest emergency in the universe while also increasing the complexity and cost of building the ship?"
ENGINEER: "Well, the alternative was just throwing all the civilians into lifepods or equipping the Galaxy class with enough shuttle capacity to carry all non-essentials and that would be incredibly boring."
ADMIRAL: "This sounds like it's prohibitively expensive, makes the ship more vulnerable to malfunction, and is something any reasonable Starfleet Captain would never commit to, because his ship will be vulnerable for at least 20 minutes in an emergency."
ENGINEER: "Oh, also, despite the fact that the saucer separation system is only to be used in a dire emergency, the saucer and battle sections are also able to re-dock in situ, meaning instead of a system to shear the connections between the saucer and the battle section in a controlled manner, and reattaching the sections back at Utopia Planitia, it's actually an extremely complicated undocking-docking procedure."
ADMIRAL: "I bet next up you'll tell me the saucer section has been designed sturdy enough to endure atmospheric re-entry and unpowered descent on a class M planet in the extremely remote - nay, astronomic - chance that the ship happens to run into its slow-motion emergency near such a planet, and all this without turning the crew into mush." -
It's a space battleship. by
on 2015-08-16 22:08:00 UTC
Link to this
As such, it gets rekt by torpedo bombers, massed fighters, and FTL-capable missiles. That's always struck me as weird; why aren't there ever fighters in Star Trek? I mean, classic-style beam phasers are bloody awful as point defence, so you'd think an enterprising group (if you'll pardon the pun) would scrape together a cargo vessel and a load of shuttlecraft, glue some photon torpedo tubes on the outside, and have a ball. Seen from above, the Galaxy-class is literally a bloody bullseye. So, er, yeah. Star Trek ships conform to very outmoded concepts of naval engagement, but without it we wouldn't have much of a story, now would we? =]
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Not even that... by
on 2015-08-17 01:15:00 UTC
Link to this
As Artell mentioned at some length, she's a long-range exploration spaceship - think of her as a Coast Guard cutter rather than a warship at all. Sure, she's got enough teeth to put up a fight, but that's definitely not her primary mission.
Also, there's an easy handwave to get rid of fighters - all you need to do is say that small craft can't carry shields capable of taking a direct shot from a capital ship's phaser banks, and give said capital ships a lower-power, faster-firing mode, and suddenly fighters start to look a lot more like skeet than a viable strategy. Space fighters in general are conforming to very outmoded (relative to the 24th century) concepts of naval combat as well. -
But that's true in any setting. by
on 2015-08-17 10:20:00 UTC
Link to this
No small craft will stand up to a shot from a much bigger one, whether it's X-Wings against Star Destroyers, jets against ships, or infantry against tanks.
The difficult part is getting your large craft to hit the small one. 'Fighters' (in the broadest sense) use maneuverability, speed, and size to counter 'capital ship' power.
To kill off fighters, you need a setting where weapon flight-time is low compared to fighter speed: fast shots, low distances, not-too-fast fighters. Star Trek has the latter two, but I don't know how fast a phaser beam-bolt-whatever travels.
(Which still doesn't make fighters a good idea. Fighter-size energy weapons won't go through shields unless something is seriously wrong, so you either need overwhelming numbers, or torpedo boats. That's probably your best strategy in Star Trek, honestly: slap a few hundred proton torpedoes onto your disposable ships. So they only get two shots off each - so what? Every shot is a shipkiller. Though honestly, why not just slap comms and a better engine on the torps and use them as a remote-control minefield? Star Trek runs close-range and with superluminal communications anyway. ^_^)
hS -
Re: But that's true in any setting. by
on 2015-08-17 20:35:00 UTC
Link to this
There actually are fighters in Starfleet in the TNG era onwards in the canon, but they don't really feature until the Dominion War because they are meant for war, not peaceful things. Doesn't Wesley fly in a trainer fighter squadron when he's in the Academy and he gets in trouble over that thing?
But if you really want to break the Star Trek universe (especially TNG onwards), consider why drones are not more of a thing. Why send a trillion tons of battleship and risk a thousand crew when you can just hurl a fleet of USVs at your enemy instead? Signal delay is not a valid excuse since you have advanced computers and subspace communications. -
One of the main arguments against drones... by
on 2015-08-17 21:45:00 UTC
Link to this
...particularly battle groups consisting entirely of drones, is enemy electronic warfare.
Sure, your drones are autonomous, so you don't have to worry about signal decay, but you're still going to want to be able to transmit new orders, update target priorities, change mission profiles, etc. so they do have to be capable of receiving signals. And if they can receive your signals then they can receive other people's signals too: which means there's a chance they can be suborned. Regardless of how good your encryption is, the weak link in that system is going to be the people that are supposed to keep the secrets - bribe one of them, and you could get yourself a whole bunch of free drones (well, free apart from the cost of the bribe).
Fiction also generally shows AIs to be less creative and not as able to handle unexpected situations as organics, which could be a serious downside in combat.
Groups of more expendable drone ships operating in support of manned warships would probably make a lot of sense.
- Irish -
There are fighters, they're just rarely seen. by
on 2015-08-17 00:07:00 UTC
Link to this
They're mentioned in the Dominion War. "Fighter Shuttles." But you do have an excellent point as to why the FLAGSHIP OF THE FEDERATION doesn't have a wing of space-ready "Get Rekt" little ships at the ready just in case stuff gets real.
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Those are converted shuttlecraft. by
on 2015-08-17 00:28:00 UTC
Link to this
As in, "looks like the misshapen offspring of a bargain-basement Thunderbird 2 knockoff and a Soviet ice cream van" shuttlecraft. A carrier squadron with dedicated fighter-bomber aspects up against a load of Galaxies would make Wolf 359 look like a seam coming loose on a teddy bear. However, I do admit they're a step in the right direction.
Actually, that's a point. How many Galaxies does it take to kill a Colonial Battlestar with full Viper assets? -
That's a tricky one. by
on 2015-08-17 10:09:00 UTC
Link to this
It seems from the Battlestar wiki that Colonial ships use physical weapons exclusively, which means all that frequency-matching going on in Star Trek is entirely pointless. Memory Alpha claims that a Constitution-class could take 90 simultaneous photon torpedoes to its shields. How many high-explosive bullets is that? Should we assume equivalence to Galactica's high-energy shells? Colonial weapons are optimised for use against superconducting armour, and are designed to cause physical damage, which makes me think they won't be too effecting against deflector shields.
So how about going the other way? A phaser strike on a Battlestar's hull should be dissipated by that armour, since phasers are energy weapons. Destroying a Battlestar with phasers will involve heating the entire hull until... well, probably until you cook the crew. That's going to take a while.
Torpedoes? Uh... Memory Alpha thinks that a single photon torpedo detonation could destroy an unshielded Galaxy-class. And that's a physical matter/antimatter detonation. Star Trek ships don't appear to be armoured, so that's not a terribly impressive achievement... but it still speaks to the power of the weapon.
How well can a Galaxy aim? If it can hit a Viper accurately with a phaser, the Viper is probably dead (due to hull heating if nothing else) - but that's true of any fighter up against main guns. Energy weapons probably make hitting your target easier, though. On the flip side, phasers are probably useless against a Battlestar - but photon torpedoes are orders of magnitude more powerful than anything the Twelve Colonies have. Unless Federation shields are highly ineffective against Colonial weapons (Memory Alpha doesn't really talk about how well they work against physical objects), I think the Galaxy takes this one.
(A Galaxy is somewhat under half the length of the Galactica, for the record. If the record cares. Which I'm not sure why it would. ^^)
hS
PS: Best weapon to use is ultra long-range AI-driven drones consisting of an engine, a warhead, and a computer (for instance, take any fighter, replace the pilot with an AI, and replace the life support, weapons, and everything else unnecessary with bombs). Stick a few hundred of them out there on long-range ballistic courses, ramp them up to a few thousand times the acceleration human-crewed ships can handle, and watch your enemy burn from across the solar system. ^^ Doesn't make for gripping TV, though. ~hS -
Hmm... by
on 2015-08-18 14:05:00 UTC
Link to this
I call shenanigans on a Constitution class's shields being able to take that much punishment. According to the episode quotes the Enterprise takes a hit equivalent to 90 photon torpedoes with little effect: it dropped the shield's integrity by 20%, but that was about it. Apparently it wasn't until it had taken a further 3 of those hits that the shields dropped.
But I can't remember any fight ever using hundreds of photon torpedoes, and I sure can remember the ships taking damage.
Also, I believe that your statement that 'photon torpedoes are orders of magnitude more powerful than anything the Twelve Colonies have' is inaccurate. According to my favourite page on the internet the destructive power of a photon torpedo is 2.7 x 10^17 Joules (equivalent to 64.3 million tonnes of TNT). Which makes it just a bit more powerful than the Tsar Bomba at 2.1 x 10^17 J (a 50 Mt yield nuclear device), and the largest mankind has ever detonated. I think that a society far enough in advance of our own to have easy FTL transport will also have continued to build bigger and more powerful weapons, so assuming that our current largest has become their standard seems reasonable to me. Having said that, phasors are almost certainly significantly more powerful than the main cannons carried by Battlestars.
We also know that the Galactica can survive nuclear strikes, and with fairly minimal damage (you know, considering they got nuked), so they could probably survive several photon torpedo hits.
Having said that, I suspect that a Constitution carries more photon torpedoes than a Battlestar carries nukes. So it's still not looking great for the Galactica.
As for how may bullets it would take to punch through a Constitution's shields... well, I don't think that anything which can take a high yield nuclear detonation is going to be bothered by any number of bullets.
- Irish -
Hmm. by
on 2015-08-18 14:57:00 UTC
Link to this
The question, really, is whether we go by the numbers or by the observed effects. Memory Alpha claims a close-range phot.torp. detonation can destroy two ships simultaneously; Battlestar never shows even large-scale damage following nukes.
Either this means that Star Trek ships are even less well-built than I already thought they were - or the production team didn't bother to calculate the actual energy yield of a 1.5 kg antimatter explosion.
In my tournament ficlet, I've made photon torpedoes probably too-powerful (the first strike takes out half of a flight pod, which probably does need reducing), but have left everything after that delightfully vague. That was probably a good plan. ^_^
hS -
Interesting. by
on 2015-08-17 13:46:00 UTC
Link to this
Something possibly of note is that (in the reimagined series at least) the Colonial Battlestars appear to use some manner of chemical propellant for their main weapons. Now, space combat, as any fule kno, occurs over very large distances. This implies that the projectiles are moving very, very fast indeed, which in turn means that high explosives are going to be vastly less effective than simply using a more massive bullet. I wonder how Trek shields stand up to high-speed kinetic bombardment; after all, it's not like they're kinetic barriers. =]
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No kinetic barriers? by
on 2015-08-17 14:35:00 UTC
Link to this
How fast can Star Trek space ships move when they don’t travel FTL? There’s probably some hand-wavy hyperspace explanation for FTL travel, but at very high STL velocity, every particle of cosmic dust should punch a micro-hole through a space ship that is neither heavily armored nor equipped with some sort of shield against fast-moving objects.
HG -
Apparently... by
on 2015-08-17 14:55:00 UTC
Link to this
... sublight ('impulse') engines have been seen to drive a ship at up to 0.5c. But given that Trek ships routinely warp space to travel, that doesn't necessarily mean it's travelling at half light-speed relative to stuff just outside the window. It's all a bit handwavy, to be honest.
hS -
Inertial dampers, apparently. by
on 2015-08-17 14:44:00 UTC
Link to this
Though precisely what they do is anyone's guess. =]
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Dampen inertia? (nm) by
on 2015-08-17 14:51:00 UTC
Link to this
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Thanks for the hSass. =] by
on 2015-08-17 14:57:00 UTC
Link to this
It's more that we don't know how it does it or why; is it some kind of space handbrake or minor shield? We just don't know.
However, that said, I do recall mention of navigational deflectors, so maybe that's what makes a tin frisbee dustproof. =] -
Normally... by
on 2015-08-17 15:13:00 UTC
Link to this
... inertial damp(en)ers are there to stop the fact that you're accelerating at thousands of gravities from making your crew into jam. They damp(en) the effect of inertia while the ship accelerates (inertia being basically the resistance of all objects to changing their velocity).
And you're welcome. ^_^
hS - Correct! by on 2015-08-17 15:06:00 UTC Link to this
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You sure? by
on 2015-08-17 14:19:00 UTC
Link to this
Actually, I'm not entirely sure which of two points you're making:
1/ The guns use space!gunpowder, which means the weapons aren't internally propelled, which means they have to fire fast to get there in any reasonable time. If this is the case, then yes, they're going at a fair clip, and the wiki actually specifically calls the Vipers' main weapons Kinetic Energy Weapons.
2/ The projectiles are internally propelled, with chemical fuel, which means they must be moving fast because they continually accelerate. This only works if they have a high rate of acceleration, of course.
To either point: the range of Battlestar combat is roughly planet-scale, I think - I'm sure I remember Galactica firing on base-stars as they came over the horizon. The scale of Federation combat is... uh... a lot less. I remember seeing a figure of 40km for something on Memory Alpha, which is frankly ridiculous.
Which means that Captain Kircardway will try to close on the Battlestar, while the Battlestar uses its Vipers to try and stand her off. Hmm... are short-range warp trips possible? If so, that's a major advantage to the Galaxy, because it gets to choose the range.
I still can't find any information on the matter-deflecting properties of Trek shields. I know they do block matter - they have to be lowered to let shuttles fly through - but how well... no idea. It doesn't matter how fast the Colonials are shooting their bullets if Kircardway's shields can stop an asteroid, for instance. (Well, it does... but you said chemical propellants, and they aren't going to give significant fractional-c speeds).
(All of this assumes Kicardway doesn't use the traditional Star Trek 'get out of combat free card': transporting a photon torpedo into the Battlestar's interior.)
hS -
'Are short-range warp trips possible'? by
on 2015-08-17 15:43:00 UTC
Link to this
Yup. In fact, tactical short-range hops similar to what you're talking about are known as the Picard Maneuver.
Although the intent in this case is different, the distances involved are probably on the same sort of scale to what you're talking about.
- Irish -
That's... why didn't that change the nature of warfare? by
on 2015-08-17 16:00:00 UTC
Link to this
By a very simple trick, you gain a 50% chance that your enemy will miss you entirely. You get to move to the exact position you want. You can open fire immediately. Even if half the time it doesn't work (ie, they target the new version), that's still a massive advantage. Why don't all Trek battles devolve into ships streaking back and forth in warp hops, hoping to land the lucky shot?
(Other than 'because that doesn't make good telly'.)
hS -
Well... by
on 2015-08-18 13:13:00 UTC
Link to this
As for why the Picard Maneuver didn't revolutionise space warfare, Data supposedly came up with a counter for it. I've read the brief explanation, and it doesn't make any sense to me, but apparently there is a countermeasure.
More realistically (I love using that word in these kind of discussions), it may be that while the short hops are possible, they aren't advisable for some reason - such a short jump could place undue strain on the FTL system, risking burning it out or something.
- Irish -
Which is good for Data and the Federation. by
on 2015-08-18 13:19:00 UTC
Link to this
But Data's, uh, basically the most advanced computer in existence, right? So the other guys - whoever the Federation happens to be fighting right now - won't come up with the same idea, and won't (once they adopt the Picard Maneuver themselves) know how the Federation is seeing past it.
I would've assumed that it put immense strain on the warp engines myself - but Memory Alpha doesn't make a whisper about that. So maybe it just never got said on the TV show?
(As to Data's counter: it only counters the least-useful aspect of the maneuver, to my mind. Given that flesh-and-blood captains give the order to fire on Star Trek ships, jumping into sudden, unexpected close-quarters is going to give you an advantage even without the 'see the ship in two places at once' effect.)
hS -
Re: That's... why didn't that change the nature of warfare? by
on 2015-08-17 20:39:00 UTC
Link to this
It's a mystery on the level of "how is it that when two spaceships rendezvous on Star Trek, they are always oriented to the same plane?"
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The former category. by
on 2015-08-17 14:37:00 UTC
Link to this
In the reimagined series, the main guns have massive muzzle flashes consistent with extremely scaled-up conventional weapons. As for the second point, well, it rather depends on the field of battle. I dimly recall planetary and stellar gravity playing hob with entering and exiting warp, buti might be wrong. In deep space, however, this is obviously not an issue. Galaxies also seem a bit more nimble than battlestars at sublight speeds, so that might be to it's advantage at longer ranges, dodging the Mercury-class's long guns as it closes range at impulse.
Whatever happens, it's a cool as hell image. =] -
Having just... by
on 2015-08-17 15:14:00 UTC
Link to this
... scribbled a quick picture of two Galaxies mobbing a Battlestar... yeah, it is.
hS -
This: by
on 2015-08-17 15:39:00 UTC
Link to this
(The Galaxies are to approximate scale with the Battlestar. Ish.)
hS -
I want this fanfic. Immediately. =] (nm) by
on 2015-08-17 17:39:00 UTC
Link to this
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Only ONE fanfic? by
on 2015-08-17 20:16:00 UTC
Link to this
I think it sounds more like a tournament bracket for me. With all battles to be resolved in ficlets, of course.
Let's see... we've got a Battlestar (1.4 km) and a Galaxy (or two ^^) at 600m. We obviously add an Imperial Star Destroyer (1.6 km), and then... hrm.
We'll have an <a href="http://wh40k.lexicanum.com/wiki/EmperorClassBattleship">Emperor-class Battleship from 40K; apparently it's about 6km in length, so may have an advantage. Then we can have a <a href="http://honorverse.wikia.com/wiki/Medusaclass">Medusa-class Superdreadnaught (Honorverse) at... the same length as Galactica, actually. And then, um... well, on the principle of 'space + fightin'', let's add Thor, at slightly under 2m. He... might face some difficulty.
Okay, and then I'm stuck for canons I can name space-battleships from off the top of my head. Um. Okay, we'll put in a Dalek saucer, though frankly I don't think it'll be a top contender. And... ah, there we go, a Firefly Victoria-class corvette. It's small, but, er, the only Firefly large ship I've heard of is apparently unarmed. ^_^
So that's eight; it's a small tournament, but it's a tournament! I might let them play on points, and run two battles each; we'll see.
hS -
Did someone start listing space battleships? by
on 2015-08-17 22:00:00 UTC
Link to this
Nah, I guess not, otherwise surely they would have mentioned Space Battleship Yamato :P
If you wanted a bigger tournament, I could probably name some more, although I might have to go to some pretty obscure series - you've certainly covered most of stuff that immediately sprang to mind.
- Irish -
Ooh, ooh! by
on 2015-08-17 22:16:00 UTC
Link to this
You gotta have a Peacekeeper command carrier and a Scarran dreadnought from the Farscape universe. {= D
By the way, have I plugged Farscape recently? No? Then please allow me to take this opportunity to do so! If you like space operas and you have not seen Farscape, you should go watch it right now. Drop everything you're doing and go.
~Neshomeh -
Re: Ooh, ooh! by
on 2015-08-17 23:37:00 UTC
Link to this
D'you know, I don't think you have plugged it recently :)
Farscape is one of those shows that I know of, but don't actually know, so my suggestion would've just been 'something from that 'verse'. However, so far hS has only been picking one contender from each different continuum. So, out of the two you've suggested, which would be your top choice?
I do like space operas, and I haven't seen Farscape - unfortunately I can't watch it right now because I need sleep. Also, I don't have the DVDs :( However, it is on my list of things to acquire, because everything I know about it makes it sound very interesting.
- Irish -
The command carrier, then. by
on 2015-08-18 15:51:00 UTC
Link to this
According to the Farscape Encyclopedia Project, a command carrier can take a dreadnought in a one-on-one fight. The carriers have superior firepower and may be more maneuverable, since they're smaller. (The PKs were horribly outnumbered in canon.)
But, it may be a moot point if hS isn't gonna use it anyway. Technobabble hurts my brain, so I can't help.
Do you have Netflix? I'm pretty sure Farscape is on Netflix. {= )
~Neshomeh -
Farscape by
on 2015-08-19 15:59:00 UTC
Link to this
No, I don't have Netflix, although I have been wondering getting an account, or one of the equivalents like Amazon Prime. My annual DVD budget is probably higher than the subscription costs would be, but I do like actually having the physical copies sitting on my shelves.
Having said that, the boxset of all the series seems to be a reasonable price at the minute, so I probably will pick it up. I've been reading a lot of new sci-fi recently, so it'd be good to have some new stuff to watch too.
- Irish -
Also, whoaheck. by
on 2015-08-18 16:20:00 UTC
Link to this
I was looking all over the chart'o'spaceships for the Farscape pair, because I was sure I'd seen the name, but I just couldn't find them. I was looking harder and harder at all the fiddly little ships, desperate to locate them. The ship from Galaxy Quest is on there, how come-?
And that's when I realised that the huge thing propping up the bottom-right corner is the Scarran dreadnought. That's... that's a big ship.
hS -
They both are, aren't they? by
on 2015-08-18 16:29:00 UTC
Link to this
I didn't think they'd be THAT much bigger... I didn't imagine that Moya would outweigh Trek's Galaxy class, either. I could swear I remember her being described in terms of football fields. O.o
~Neshomeh -
Mutter, mutter, grumble, grumble. OKAY SO: by
on 2015-08-18 16:17:00 UTC
Link to this
The inaugral All-Multiverse Warship Rally is already underway; the eight competitors have had their first round each, so a third of the battles have been played.
Obviously, news of this has spread across the rest of the Multiverse, and new challengers are lining up to enter. The Organisers Who Shall Remain Nameless (OWSReNs) have been forced to lay down some rules:
-Only one ship class may be entered from each civilisation or faction.
-This ship may have docked smaller ships (ie, a carrier), but may not receive assistance from outside forces.
-The ship must be a production ship, ie, representative of the larger members of its armed forces. Unique, one-or-a-few-of-a-kind vessels will not be permitted. (So the Imperial contender is a standard Star Destroyer, not a Death Star or a Super Star Destroyer).
-Entries will be accepted or rejected at the discretion of the OWSReNs.
Submit your entries now.
~
So both the command carrier and the dreadnought can enter, since they seem to be from opposing sides. So can Space Battleship Yamato, providing I can find some stats on it. And if you - any you - have any other requests, drop 'em here and I'll see if I can work them into Round Two.
hS, apparently either a sucker for punishment or eager to please -
I would love to see... by
on 2015-08-18 12:00:00 UTC
Link to this
... someone do a full-scale bracket, with all the iconic ships we can come up with. There's even a glorious size-comparison chart to work from.
For the first run, though, I'm only using ships I'm familiar(ish) with, because I'm writing ficlets to represent the fights. If people are willing to volunteer to write the matches I can't, I'm perfectly happy to expand-and-redo... might get complicated, though.
(And yes, I was sticking with one ship per 'verse, otherwise some of them would be massively over-represented. But, again, that can be tweaked for Version Two.)
hS -
In addition to that nifty poster... by
on 2015-08-20 12:25:00 UTC
Link to this
There is also this rather cool website. Just click on the '10X', '100X' etc. tabs to see comparisons of various ships, drones and creatures. Thought it might interest you.
- Irish -
^_^ I love that website. by
on 2015-08-20 12:55:00 UTC
Link to this
If someone comes up with something that's too big or small to appear on the poster, I'll probably be cribbing it from there.
Actually, I'll probably get the next image for the Retribution-class from there anyway; it's in colour!
hS -
First Multiversal All-Out Space Battleship Tournament by
on 2015-08-20 12:50:00 UTC
Link to this
Report on Proceedings Here
In which we see that size, power, armour, speed, range, and small craft all matter - though some more than others.
We are now taking candidates for the Second Etc Tournament. Multiple ships per continuum will be accepted, but only one per side.
hS -
My (spoilery) thoughts. by
on 2015-08-20 15:18:00 UTC
Link to this
You make a compelling case for the Champion (and I'm not just saying that because the Honorverse is one of my favourite settings).
Round 1
I'm glad to see the Battlestar got through her first round encounter (even if she did take a bit of a kicking).
Round 2
Thor hefted his hammer. "Right," he said. "This could take a while." - loved that line :)
Although not surprised that it didn't go well for him.
Round 3
The Star Destroyer Vanquisher moved through space like a shark - what, you mean it had to keep moving forward to stop itself from sinking? (Sorry, but that was my first thought on reading that line)
Round 4
...every single one wasted itself against the roof of [Insert ship name here]'s wedge. - a line taken straight out of so many of the books.
I also thought, at first, that a salvo of 200 warheads seemed low for an SD(P). Then I wondered if that was just because I'm used to seeing the thousands and tens of thousands that battlegroups throw, rather than just a single ship.
I'm still not sure though. According to the technical specs, a Medusa-class has enough fire control links to handle salvos of 200 pods, but each pod will be carrying somewhere between (I think) 6 - 12 missiles depending on which generation they are.
Just thought I'd mention it, because the fact that HMS Masquerade fires off 200 missiles in each encounter makes it seem like you think 200 missiles is her maximum throw weight, when actually it's much higher than that.
Round 5
Nothing much to say here. Shame the Battlestar got taken out, but I agree with your reasoning.
Round 6
Masquerade's missile pods gave her a heavier weight of fire, but once rolled they were critically vulnerable to proximity kills. - not so much. See, the thing is, the early pod designs towed their (completely unshielded) missile pods outside the ship's wedge, which meant that they were exposed, and that the ship's max acceleration and turn speed was reduced - if the ship was fired on before they'd turned to present their broadside for firing, then the pods would simply be lost as collateral damage to all the bomb-pumped x-rays flying around. Heck, one decent ship-killer could probably take out dozens of pods if it went off in the right place.
But with the design of the podnaughts, the missile pods are only exposed to potential enemy fire when they are about to be fired themselves. Yes, they could still be taken out, but the Star Destroyer's primary armaments are its turbolaser batteries - and these weapons don't have blast radiuses to worry about. Sure, a hit from one will definitely destroy a pod (for the same reason that it'd shred any starfighter), but I doubt they'd be able to aim for them. Also, once your pods are rolled, you don't have to worry about them too much - if you see incoming fire that might take them out, just launch. You may not have the best firing solution at that point, but you don't have to lose the missiles.
Round 7
Nice tactic from the Masquerade there. Also, as a comment about the tournament in general, I like how the outcome of some of the fights is due to differences in the science of the settings, and how some tactics just don't work against ships that use different rules - such as the Honorverse's 'only vulnerable from the sides' quirk.
I'm not sure about the damage that Masquerade sustained though. The only comparable instance I can think of is in On Basilisk Station, when Fearless disables a Havenite courier ship with a close pass, but the courier ship has significantly less powerful nodes, and it's the nodes that get damaged - not the hull. Which to me implies that it suffers some kind of energy feedback thing on its nodes, which caused the damage. If Fearless had passed closer, then the hull would have been damaged by the gravitational stresses, just as happened to the Cataclysm, but I don't see why Masquerade's nodes would have suffered damage in this case - there was no conflicting gravity wave present to cause the kind of feedback that I think is necessary for this damage.
Of course, this is all just conjecture on my part, as I don't believe the question of what happens when wedge strikes a significant mass has ever been answered in canon.
The only incident I can think of is at the end of In Enemy Hands, when a pinnace brings it's wedge up um... very close... to the much larger mass of a battlecrusier, and the nodes certainly last a little while: it's possible that they burned out, but equally possible that they didn't - and I don't think we'll be getting any witness statements. While the pinnace is certainly destroyed, that destruction could have come from any number of sources.
But, it's your story, and I can't think of any reason why it couldn't happen like that - it just isn't what I would expect.
I have some candidates in mind for the Second Tournament, but they are mostly from more obscure series, or from canons that I know of, but don't really know that well myself, so I'm going to have to have a look around and see if there are decent reference sites for them. One thing that did occur to me about this first tournament is that the computer games were severely underrepresented.
- Irish -
Oh, wait, one other incident: by
on 2015-08-21 11:46:00 UTC
Link to this
During Oyster Bay, we see a tug catching chunks of space station on its wedge with no negative effects. And it's entirely possible some of those were Retribution-sized.
But, they weren't using space-time warps as shielding, which seems to be what void shields are. So the effect still makes a certain sense. ^_^
hS -
Responses. by
on 2015-08-20 15:51:00 UTC
Link to this
3: Hilariously, the Wookieepedia entry for 'shark' currently says that it's 'a creature that bore a superficial resemblance to an Imperial-class Star Destroyer'. And I thought I was being original... :D
#4: I had it at 200 because I thought that was what the Wiki said... oops. You're right, and I did think it was low. I'll edit that (since it's only really coming up as 'overwhelming numbers').
#6: I was thinking they could still get destroyed while they were being laid. I remember at one point that pods were being rolled on timers, so a salvo consisted of coordinated launches solely because they were carefully timed. But that may have been when they were still mucking about with... ugh, was it Wayfarer? Whatever the merchant ship was.
On reflection, yes, I remember ships launching all their rolled pods to protect them, so you're right; I'll edit that.
#7: I was thinking of the In Enemy Hands maneuver, yep. ^_^ That goes down as one of my favourite/most shocking moments in the Honorverse, and in an environment where the enemy doesn't have its own wedge to inflict the same damage on you - yeah, it's pretty lethal.
I've gone with 'causes massive damage' on the principle that, uh, suddenly inflicting the wedge with something weighing on the order of billions of tonnes is probably not a good idea. You don't see Honorverse ships pulverising asteroids by wandering past, and there's probably a good reason for that. I don't know what the effect of hitting a wedge with ludicrous amounts of mass would be, but this seems a decent bet.
I'll eagerly welcome candidates for Round 2; Masquerade shouldn't really be Grand Champion, given that she won twice based on 'you don't know how my tech works'.
hS -
If you'll accept a few: by
on 2015-08-20 16:44:00 UTC
Link to this
1: Terran Dominion Fleet TDF Bucephalus (StarCraft II: Wings Of Liberty)
Another slab-looking bruiser, though unfortunately rather smaller than a Mercury-class. However, it's also rather better-armed than a Merc, complete with the totally-not-a-reference "Yamato Cannon" stowed away.
#2: Asgard O'Neill-class (Stargate: SG1)
We've seen how well Thor did in the last round. Let's see what his little grey counterpart's biggest, shootiest ship can do instead. My money's on "better". Because it'd be difficult to do worse. =]
#3: United Federation of Planets Starfleet USS Enterprise-J (Star Trek)
This time, the Federation wants to put up a liiiiiiitle bit more of a fight than previously. The largest and most technologically advanced ship seen on the Star Trek TV show. If you haven't heard of it, that's because it was featured on Enterprise. Yyyyyeah. =]
#4: UN Spacy SDF-1 Macross (Robotech/Macross, depending on localization)
Is it a ship? Is it a robot? Who cares? The question is: can anything stop the rampant Honorverse ships, and is that thing a giant transforming mecha from space?
---
More on the second bracket as it develops. =] -
Accepted. by
on 2015-08-21 10:20:00 UTC
Link to this
And the bracket is now full, with 16 entrants. Some of whom are... um... quite silly. Yes.
hS -
And can I just say: by
on 2015-08-21 11:12:00 UTC
Link to this
The Enterprise-J is a gorgeous ship. Can I get that TV show instead of the films?
hS -
Er, possibly? by
on 2015-08-21 13:50:00 UTC
Link to this
I mean, it was only featured fairly briefly, according to Memory Alpha, because Enterprise-J (for Jesus, That's A Big Tin Frisbee) is from the 26th Century... aaaaaaand Enterprise the TV show was a prequel to the main series, primarily taking place in the 22nd Century. Until the later seasons started mucking around with the spacetime continuum. =]
But yeah, I like the J. It can am frisbee gud. =] -
Replies by
on 2015-08-20 16:41:00 UTC
Link to this
6: Yes, they certainly can be destroyed once they been rolled (hell, if a hit gets through the sidewall and hull armour they can be destroyed before), but it seems like a much lower risk in this situation. The Star Destroyer's weapons, being non-explosive, probably aren't going to do much to the pods, simply because they'll likely be targeted against the ship laying them.
I think the main problem Wayfarer (yes, I'm pretty sure you got that right) had was that she was the trial for this type of weapon design, and had been made by retro-fitting an existing merchant hull. That meant that she was quite slow to roll her pods, and her mission profile meant that she didn't have the back-up from a full task group while she did so. She also ended up going up against opponents with significant defences (if I remember rightly she went up against battlecruisers, when she was meant to be on anti-piracy patrols), which meant that the only way she could beat them was to roll several salvos of pods, then launch them all at once for one massive salve that completely overwhelmed her target's point defence. So while she was assembling her heavy salvo, it was very vulnerable.
The proper pod-layers can lay more pods at once than she could, and of course they tend to operate in large groups, so they can get their overwhelming salvos by having a dozen ships roll two sets of pods, instead of one ship roll two dozen sets. This means that modern pod-layers are much less vulnerable to having their pods killed, as they are more spread out, and the salvo takes less time to assemble.
#7: Obviously my personal head canon is different from yours, but I see the nodes and their gravity bands like a cutting torch - put an object in the way, and that object is going to get wrecked, but the torch (or impellar nodes) are going to be unaffected by the object. Point two of them at each other, and they could both take damage, but if one is significantly more powerful than the other then it will 'win' in short order, and no longer have to worry about taking damage.
The thing is, the gravity bands are intangible objects that are being projected remotely. I don't see why disruption of those bands by physical would cause anything to happen to the actual projectors - but I can see conflicting energy fields setting up some sort of destructive harmonic/oscillation in the emitters. I dunno why, it just seems different to me.
As for Masquerade's 'easy win', it seems quite sensible so far, and I'm struggling to think of a non-Honorverse ship that would be able to overcome that. Even in settings which have powerful defence shields, like Star Trek and Star Wars, generally speaking hammering on those shields will cause them to break. But nothing can get through a military grade wedge - if Masquerade just approaches 'belly up', then rolls when she's good and ready to fire, she'll be able to soak up all the initial incoming fire.
Even a surprise attack from a stealth ship wouldn't necessarily do that much, as they'd have to get lucky and fire down the throat or kilt for it to do any good (which they might not want to do anyway - after all, ships present a much bigger target from the side, so hitting them amidships has got be easier, right?). And if the Masquerade survives the first blow then she'll be able to fight back.
The only thing I can think of off the top of my head that would stand a reasonable chance is something much more massive, that could soak up the kind of punishment a Medusa can dish out, and would actually have a chance to learn about her peculiarities while still being combat effective. Maybe some of the Titans from EVE Online? I dunno, I tend to lose interest in the supermassive stuff.
- Irish -
Obviously, I still disagree. ^_^ by
on 2015-08-20 17:02:00 UTC
Link to this
The gravity bands are... well... gravity! That's gonna have some kind of impact when they hit something massive, even if it's only the object's own gravity (and a 7-km ship will definitely have that, even without gravity generation) distorting the field.
Also: I wasn't joking about the Masquerade and the ISD being evenly-matched. A Medusa has no shielding at her bow and stern, and a Star Destroyer has bombers. Can you imagine the damage a proton torpedo could do if it got inside the inner hull? Yikes!
I'm pretty sure an ISD's turbolasers could burn through her sidewalls, too: they're basically just shields. The problem for the Imperials was simply that they use a mode of combat that has become outdated in the Honorverse.
hS -
You have NO IDEA how hard it was... by
on 2015-08-17 22:21:00 UTC
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To refrain from putting an 1812 expy in my missions with Doktor Trollenfisch and Gabrielle. I think him and our resident Cutest Flareon Ever would get along well. =]
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HTML is for weaklings. (nm) by
on 2015-08-17 20:17:00 UTC
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Or, more importantly... by
on 2015-08-17 08:49:00 UTC
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How long will the Vipers last against a Galaxy, with Battlestar support? Loved that description of the 'fighters' by the way.
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New Mission: Little Miss Mary! by
on 2015-08-16 20:32:00 UTC
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At long last, Little Miss Mary is finally dead!
And even better? Mission number forty, guys!
Yes, yes, I realize it's early, but I got moved into college today and already found a D&D group who'll be meeting late tomorrow, thus making me bump posting up. You're welcome. :P
HOWEVER.
The interlude?
Contains massive spoilers if you click it first.
I know this sounds like I'm baiting you, but I promise I am not.
DO NOT CLICK THE INTERLUDE FIRST UNLESS YOU WANT TO BE IMMEDIATELY SPOILED.
Are we clear?
Good.
And, since this mission is a big deal, guys, please make sure your posts are marked with spoilers. I'll even give you a thing to copy-paste into your post when you comment!
SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS
So, you can tell I'm serious about this.
Now then, without further delay!
The Mission (NSFW/B!)
The Interlude
Keep ahold of your hats. This is gonna be a wild ride. -
My god. by
on 2015-08-19 23:04:00 UTC
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That... I wasn't expecting that. Hopefully, Rina isn't gone for good, she was one of my favorite agents, and I think the first one I read. Actually, the other day I was thinking, "Where's Alex? We haven't seen him in a while," and then this happened and... wow. -
Re: My god. by
on 2015-08-20 14:34:00 UTC
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Yeah, this happened. *offers hugs*
If you want to know what happened to the Aviator, check out the interlude further up the Board. That should help sate some of your curiosity. :) -
Welll. that was something. by
on 2015-08-18 15:02:00 UTC
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Fic was so terrible I stopped reading the excerpts after... I think the second one. About Rina and Zeb... Ouch. I hope the Luxray will get better soon, and that Rina didn't actually die in the explosion (Though, if the Ten Years Hence is to be trusted, she... don't quite did?)
I don't know how much is planned about Rina, but if you need reinforcements for a crazy rescue plan I gladly offer all of my Agents and ex-Agents.
Hell, just a wrong word with Corolla by Alex during his internship would be enough to make the little crazy Unison Device try to come up with a way to find where and when Rina ended up, and a way to get through the Time Lock (Which may or may not involve kidnapping the Doctor himself while he's in FicPsych or Medical). -
Ehe, ^^; by
on 2015-08-18 15:09:00 UTC
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Try having to read all 168 pages of the fic... *shudders*
Zeb's gonna be getting an interlude soon, and as for RinAviator... well, there's a new interlude up. >:)
They can try to get to Gallifrey all they like, but unless they're able to find a natural plothole, it'll be a very difficult, if not impossible, endeavor. Agents can't access Gallifrey, even with their portal technology, so all they'd be able to do is cross their fingers and hope for the best.
Besides, my Plans are only just beginning... -
Wow. Just... wow. by
on 2015-08-18 00:45:00 UTC
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The fic itself was... What. Did. I. Just. Read. The excerpts alone garnering that reaction was enough for me to agree that it isn't Legendary for nothing.
As for the mission itself and the interlude... Good gods. Rina becoming the Reader's caretaker was a heck of a well-done plot twist. But... If Zeb recovers, once he recovers, will he get a new partner? I don't think the Flowers will let him go into missions without one...
Great job, overall, and I can't wait to see the interlude explaining what happened to Rina in the end. -
Yup. (Response to Matt as well) by
on 2015-08-18 13:14:00 UTC
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There really isn't much left to say about the fic itself other than GUH.
As for the mission... Heh. DawnFire and I have been plotting this for a while now, and we've just been excited/more than a little relieved at how well everyone's received it. Like I said in earlier posts, there shall be an interlude showing some of what happened so people aren't left hanging.
...I think I might post that today, actually.
As for the future: spoilers, guys. But I am thinking about giving Zeb a new partner sometime in September-ish.
Thanks for reading. :) -
Theories? by
on 2015-08-19 17:37:00 UTC
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If you guys have theories as to what the future might entail, put 'em here!
So, Rina's ended up on Gallifrey and in the Time War, right? Therefore, there's likely a main universe counterpart to her that has always lived on Gallifrey. She's going to fall into HQ, get partnered with Zeb, and it's going to be chock full of feels like Ixi's stuff always is. What better way to play off of Zeb's guilt than to send everyone a Replacement Goldfish? -
Personally? by
on 2015-08-18 00:48:00 UTC
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I want her to be MIA during the Time War (the Reader wouldn't know if she survived... I think), just so Ixi could pull a Moffat-style trick and bring her back like he brought Gallifrey back... But that's just wishful thinking, I'm sure of it. -
*Standing Ovation* by
on 2015-08-17 22:22:00 UTC
Link to this
I ended up crying in the middle of the night after I read this, just so you know. :V
Very, very well done! -
That was incredible by
on 2015-08-17 16:24:00 UTC
Link to this
You know what me showing up means?
I swear to all the authors, when we get back HQ, I’m going to be having serious words with the Flowers.
Missing word.
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Alas, it doesn’t happen. Or – maybe – after many years?
I didn’t expect that Rina would become Arin. Very well played, Ixi and Dawn.
HG -
Fixx'd. by
on 2015-08-17 16:32:00 UTC
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Can't tell you what's in the future, except that the TYH Ave had isn't canon. As for what happened to Rina after leaving... Expect an interlude within a few days.
And thank you very much; we've been plotting this thing for months now, and we've been excited to see how it's received. I'm glad to hear you liked it! -
I am not worthy. *bows* (nm) by
on 2015-08-17 14:53:00 UTC
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I second that! by
on 2015-08-17 15:45:00 UTC
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That was... I thing. by
on 2015-08-17 12:29:00 UTC
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An interesting thing, but a thing none the less. I... I need some time to process what just happened.
I'll talk when I pull my head together.
I mean. Just... And the whole thing with Rina...running off to join the Druids...
I need some time...
WHAT? You thought I was going to spoil what really happened? Read the darn mission yourself! I know, it can be hard to get through, but you can do it. If you find you cant, remember that if it is in bold, it's smut. Read everything else, you should be able to piece the "plot" together if the fic itself is too much for you.
Seriously though, I do need time to properly think. I'll talk a bit later. -
*pats back* Take all the time you need. (nm) by
on 2015-08-17 12:53:00 UTC
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THIS IS WHY I SHOULD CHECK THE BOARD MORE. by
on 2015-08-17 06:09:00 UTC
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But you already know I loved the mission and the interlude. It was a wild ride indeed. Thank you for sharing it with us.
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Okay... by
on 2015-08-17 04:08:00 UTC
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I'm coherent now. Iximaz: you have an insanely high tolerance for badfic. Maybe I've been reading too much Mervin and Hyde, but seeing Snape like that... broke me temporarily.
Here, have some chocolate. -
*noms chocolate* by
on 2015-08-17 04:12:00 UTC
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My secret was M&Ms. I think I went through two full-sized bags of them while writing this thing.
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...well then by
on 2015-08-17 01:03:00 UTC
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(SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS)
(I mean it SPOILERS AHEAD!)
I'm gonna miss Rina.
And, should he not recover, Zeb.
And I feel so very sorry for Alex. -
*offers hugs* (nm) by
on 2015-08-17 01:04:00 UTC
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Well... It's time for "Cipher Reacts"! by
on 2015-08-16 23:43:00 UTC
Link to this
First of all, I called it! You pulled a Scott Cawthon and released it earlier! :D
Okay, let's start... Oh, right... the thing you mentioned:
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There, happy? Now we go!
1) Zeb... I love you, buddy, and bless your fur, really... but you just couldn't stop yourself and not report the previous accident!?
2) "Actually, I'm from Sinnoh." Again, bless your fur, Zeb :)
3) Ouch... now I feel sorry for Rina and the whole Bleeprin thing. Also, not only Des but also Alfred Pennyworth would feel offended with the whole tea issue! And me, as a matter of fact! I make wonderful tea!
4) Okay,HarryMary starts imitating Cho Chang's 'hip-wiggle'... Where's my Bleeprin?
5) ..."Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day!"... Now, THAT'S going into my dictionary!
6) *The bath scene* Okay, just some boring, poorly written teasing, nothing to see here... *'first knuckle'* OOOOH, THERE WE GO!
7) Oh, the 'wand = d*ck' comparison... Wow, never seen that before...
8) I said this before but... poor Rina. There must be some kind of way out for her to dull the bad memories. Unless you're trying to get her fully insane and discharged... Oh no... y-you're not... are you?
9) Wow, any mention of druids is apparently Rina's Pavlov reaction... Not that I'm surprised.
10) Awww, I wanna Death Easters! It's so cute!
11) No... no, no, no... no, I'm done... I can't...
I need a break...
.
.
.
.
.
Okay, we're back after Remus and Sirius having their hot wolf-on-man action.
12) No! Zeb, endure it!
13) ...Zeb...?
14) ZEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEB!!!!!!
15) Rina, what are you doing...?
16) AND WE WELCOME THE AVIATOR ON BOARD! Aside the whole Zeb situation, I'm happy that she decided to accept her new persona!
17) No... I can't handle the interlude in this post. I'm done. We're done here! -
Well well well. by
on 2015-08-17 01:04:00 UTC
Link to this
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1) Well, it wasn't so much an accident as it was 'Rina flying off the hook and going batcrap crazy'.
8) She's allergic to all Bleep products and metabolizes alcohol too well to get drunk, sorry.
12, 13, 14) ZEB INDEED.
15) She finally snapped for good.
16) Sorry, not exactly. See, Ten Years Hence stories aren't always canon, y'see. Try scrolling down to the bottom of this and take a good long look at the categories. The Time War ain't exactly good for your health, you know. -
But she already qualified! ^_^ by
on 2015-08-17 06:17:00 UTC
Link to this
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All the "dead agents" category said was that all the agents in it died at least once, and didn't necessarily stay dead... ;) -
Hmm... by
on 2015-08-17 04:31:00 UTC
Link to this
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Double spoilers, because this is for more of an Easter Egg reference than anything else.
First off, the mission was incredible. You did a great job with both the fic itself and the storytelling portion of it. I was really blown away.
If Rina really is killed off, though, it feels kind of... anti-climatic. I mean, we don't even really see what happens to her. On the other hand, you've heavily foreshadowed the idea of her regenerating and coming back. I'd much rather see that than have her just vanish. It's up to you, of course, that's just my two cents. -
Actually... by
on 2015-08-17 04:42:00 UTC
Link to this
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There is going to be an interlude, of sorts, titled "Snippets of Gallifrey" that will be released within the next few weeks. As for what else the future holds... Spoilers. ;)
And thank you so much! I (and my small army of betas) have been working very hard on this to make sure it was good, and I'm glad to hear you liked it so much. -
Is that a mini-Boarder? Oops. (nm) by
on 2015-08-17 04:42:00 UTC
Link to this
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Wut by
on 2015-08-16 22:01:00 UTC
Link to this
Wut.
Wut.
Wut.
Seriously, what was that?
Okay, John and Mary? Like, Winchester?
...OH NO YOU DID NOT STEAL MY NAME FOR YOUR HELLSPAWN, SUETHOR!
D-:
...Wow, I'm not completely incoherent. -
Well, John and Mary by
on 2015-08-16 23:03:00 UTC
Link to this
Are basically the two most common English names. Plus there's Biblical symbolism as well. I very much doubt the author was thinking of Supernatural.
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I'm showing my age... by
on 2015-08-24 11:31:00 UTC
Link to this
"John and Mary" always makes me think of the eccentric, dysfunctional husband and wife on I'm Sorry, I'll Read That Again.
-
Seconded on the spoiler thing, guys. by
on 2015-08-16 21:17:00 UTC
Link to this
Be very careful before you post. This mission has been months in the making, with a ton of thought and care and love put into it. Don't be the person who ruins it for someone else because you forgot a spoiler tag!
-
Dora Wolf Hexalogy by
on 2015-08-17 17:22:00 UTC
Link to this
As some of you may or may not know, my dream is to become an interpreter in both writing and speech. I have this thing, where I search for English novels and try to translate them. But... why don't I try the other way around? Take some of Poland's best books and try to translate them to English? The only problem is – I need readers! Recipients! Audience!
My first big Polish project would be The Soul Thief, Book One from 'Dora Wolf Hexalogy'.
The shortest description I could think about it would be: Think The Dresden Files, with a genderbent main character.
Now, would there be anyone willing to Beta-slash-read my work just like that? Also, don't worry about the copyrights; I'm friends with the author, she allowed me to use her book for a non-profit fan translation. -
Ixi? Voyd? Ed? SMF? Dawn? Would you guys read it? (nm) by
on 2015-08-18 13:56:00 UTC
Link to this
-
Willing to glance over a short piece or two... by
on 2015-08-18 15:15:00 UTC
Link to this
...but not to edit the whole thing, no. Quite honestly--even if you were paying me to edit the whole thing, I simply wouldn't have the time. I'm a full-time university student pursuing two degrees, doing a placement one day a week for which I'll have to make lesson plans this year, and I may end up with a Sunday job again, too. I'll (hopefully...) have free time this year, but definitely not enough to edit or comment on an entire book.
However, translation is very interesting to me (although I don't know any Polish at all, unless any of it is the same as the tiny bits of Russian that I know/you count whatever Polish words made it into Yiddish, which I can't actually identify since I don't speak Polish--wait, where was I going with this? Oh, right). Essentially, I wouldn't be at all able to tell you if your translation is accurate, but I can let you know if a short piece is understandable or if I see any really glaring errors. But yeah, there's no way I could beta the entire thing.
~DF -
No, no, no, no...NO! Forget any beta completely! by
on 2015-08-18 15:30:00 UTC
Link to this
I'm asking if you guys would read it, just for the sake of reading it! No beta-ing, just for pleasure!
-
Ah, I see. by
on 2015-08-18 15:57:00 UTC
Link to this
In that case... maybe pieces of it. I don't even know if I'd like the book, you see.
~DF -
Okay, I cancel Beta request... by
on 2015-08-17 18:05:00 UTC
Link to this
I don't want to strain any of you guys with this much work. If anyone of you wants to read it just for fun - let me know!
-
Well... by
on 2015-08-17 18:02:00 UTC
Link to this
Not beta, but I don't mind taking a peek every once in a while and being peanut gallery. I'm a curious person, me.
-
This is just a fan project, right? by
on 2015-08-17 18:00:00 UTC
Link to this
Sorry, but although I'm willing to beta a mission, I don't think I could do a full novel without some kind of financial compensation.
-
How about reading it for pure enjoyment? (nm) by
on 2015-08-17 18:04:00 UTC
Link to this
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Well... by
on 2015-08-17 20:19:00 UTC
Link to this
Once it's translated, I suppose I might. But there's a big difference in the level of detailed reading required to edit something.
-
Are we back? by
on 2015-08-18 11:54:00 UTC
Link to this
Looks like we're back.
Before anyone asks - no real idea what just happened, except that the entire disc.yourwebapps namespace vanished for a few hours. Assuming it doesn't happen again, I figure we just chalk it up to 'sometimes computers break' and move on.
hS -
Huh. Good. by
on 2015-08-18 21:59:00 UTC
Link to this
I'd just installed AdBlock, you see, and then I came here and it immediately crashed when I tried to look at a message. I'm quite glad that's not the problem (because ads suck).
-
I'd just like to say... by
on 2015-08-18 20:35:00 UTC
Link to this
... I know some of us oldbies sometimes go on about how the PPC feels like less of a community nowadays, how there's none of the off-Board interaction we used to get, etc etc.
But when I came down this morning and saw the Board was missing, I knew - just /knew/ - that I'd have emails in my inbox about it. And I did. Over the course of the day, four different people sent me messages about it, and some of those mentioned other people in on the loops.
So thank you, everyone. It's good to know we've still got it when it counts. ^_^
hS, feeling good -
Re: Are we back? by
on 2015-08-18 20:30:00 UTC
Link to this
So we don't have to panic anymore?
-
I shall call it 'The Great Board Crash of 2015'. by
on 2015-08-18 14:12:00 UTC
Link to this
Maybe. Unless a few hours of the site being down doesn't qualify as a 'Great Board Crash'... Probably it'll have to have lasted all day or something, I dunno.
Anyway, I got a "Connection Refused" message when I tried to respond. So I'm guessing the server must've malfunctioned in some way, perhaps a security issue. -
I would just omit "Great" by
on 2015-08-18 14:37:00 UTC
Link to this
I don't think it was even a full day of absence.
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We're back! by
on 2015-08-18 13:11:00 UTC
Link to this
(I only got an internal server error. *shrug*)
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That was scary. by
on 2015-08-18 13:02:00 UTC
Link to this
Perhaps we ought to come up with a contingency plan in case this happens again?
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We have one. by
on 2015-08-18 13:09:00 UTC
Link to this
Unfortunately, it's the Other Board. ^_^
Did the Wiki forum not work out? I only had time to set it up before coming to work, so I haven't seen how things went. But if it worked moderately well, it's a suitable short-term hideout.
hS -
Hm... by
on 2015-08-18 15:40:00 UTC
Link to this
The wiki's forum actually appears to be disabled in Wiki Features. Did you or somebody else disable it again? Or, how did you go about setting it up?
~Neshomeh -
Huh? by
on 2015-08-18 15:59:00 UTC
Link to this
It was working this morning...
Actually, all I did was find the link to it; it was already there when I got to it, with five old threads sitting in it. The link I then posted to the top of the Wiki's front page this morning.
If someone's disabled it, it weren't me.
hS -
Old vs New by
on 2015-08-18 16:17:00 UTC
Link to this
I suspect there are old forums and new forums. What we've got right now is an old forum, the threads of which pretty much behaves like any other wiki article; what could be enabled in Wiki Features is a new forum, which would behave like... a forum. Do we want to give it a try and see what happens, just in case we need it?
~Neshomeh -
Sounds like a good idea. by
on 2015-08-18 16:23:00 UTC
Link to this
Though it's obviously not my preferred refuge, since I can't actually get to it from here...
hS -
And here we go! by
on 2015-08-18 17:15:00 UTC
Link to this
Friends, I give you the Wechi Mountain Refuge, a safe place to go should both Borrd and Ozerborrd for some reason need to be evacuated.
(There are also a bunch of fora for wiki conversation, if you want to do any of that. The "topics" thing could be cool, I guess.)
~Neshomeh -
I'll give it a go, then. by
on 2015-08-18 16:35:00 UTC
Link to this
Hopefully we won't need it.
~Neshomeh -
Wiki? by
on 2015-08-18 13:16:00 UTC
Link to this
Only saw Voyd and Nesh's posts on there before I went to bed, so I haven't yet seen how that turned out.
*rolls out of bed to look* -
Intermittently, at least. by
on 2015-08-18 12:32:00 UTC
Link to this
It's still occasionally cutting out over here.
I'd suggest hanging on before we announce it fully over. -
Yes, we're back. Bring out the cake! (nm) by
on 2015-08-18 11:56:00 UTC
Link to this
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New interlude! (Spoilers for Little Miss Mary) by
on 2015-08-18 14:11:00 UTC
Link to this
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Presenting "Snippets of Gallifrey", which shows a little bit of what the Aviator got up to while she was on the run.
Just remember, guys, use the spoiler tag. Enjoy! -
Reaction and edits by
on 2015-08-20 04:44:00 UTC
Link to this
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Really?! You give us hope, only to leave us with a cliffhanger?! I don't know whether to call you a genius or a troll.
That aside, it was a pretty interesting interlude. Here's hoping that the Narrative Laws have some mercy on poor Rina/Aviator/[long Gallifreyan name that I dare not try to type]!
A few errors, though:
1) Once outside, she made her way to the alley several streets away where she had parked her TARDIS.
There's a comma missing before "where."
2) She was still coughing up artron energy, but she was stabilized enough Silvan had let her go to her own bedroom.
Missing word: "she was stabilized enough that Silvan had let her go to her own bedroom." -
It's like some blend of an interlude and a fanfic. by
on 2015-08-20 05:11:00 UTC
Link to this
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What do I look like, Moffat's successor? Oh no.
I am much worse than that.
I am the stuff of Moffat's nightmares.
Joking aside, I'm glad you liked it. Errors are now fixed, and as for the Aviator's ultimate fate...
Well, I think everyone can infer what happened next. -
To: Sunflower Official - c.c. Board of Department Heads by
on 2015-08-18 17:37:00 UTC
Link to this
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It has come to my attention that two of Corolla's friends, Agents Rina Dives and Zeb, got assigned a Legendary to mission on their own when Rina wasn't in the condition to complete the mission even if they had backup.
I have no idea of how you idiotic sunflora thought it could end any differently that the way it did: Agent Dives SIA and possibly MIA and Zeb barely escaping death and currently in... whatever that saving-from-otherwise-certain-death-vat that thing is.
I am very appalled of the stance of you and your colleagues about Agents' wellbeing, and I am fully expecting a rescue team to be dispacted to rescue Agent Dives and give her proper treatment for her mental state. I, Former Agent Nikki CHerrifower and Agent Corolla are volunteering to partecipate.
If you ignore the matter, then you will be expecting a daisycutter in your office.
Former Agent Sergio Turbo, Department of Floaters, Special Operations Division, Knight's Grand Cross of the Order of the Mochi.
P.S. If it wasn't clear enough, for "daisycutter" I meant a fuel-air explosive bomb. You've been warned. I'm sick of this s[CENSORED], and I have no intention of risking the same to happen to Corolla or anyone else.
[So... The commenting about the interlude was made in the document's chat and... well, I might have instigated a riot against the Flowers there...] -
To... well, everyone reached by Sergio's message. by
on 2015-08-19 14:51:00 UTC
Link to this
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I apologize for my ex-partner's letter. Shouldn't have told him what happened, he threw a tantrum and wrote the letter impulsively. He's already calmed down, and he's kinda sorry for acting on anger. He also promised he won't carry on his threat, and in fact I doubt he would even be able to do something this evil. (Still couldn't get him to apologize fro that though - keeps saying he resigned for a reason)
So please please don't antagonize him? Nikki and I are doing our best to keep him from doing anything rash, and some of the answers he received are kinda getting on his nerves. Well, he did need the well-placed dopeslap they are, but... Oh, I'm not good at this kind of stuff.
Still, he has a point. He kinda took it personal due to something that happened before he was recruited - not saying more 'cause it's, well, his call if he wants to tell - and hearing of what happened to my friends kinda got him, but I do agree that sending that Legendary to them was out-of-line and yes, I know that some of you won't agree. I don't care.
Now excuse me, but I've got a rather desperate Intern Alex Dives here and I have to find a way to explain to him that her sister is considered a criminal without making him more broken than he already is. Anyone telling that to his face is going to get their console's mission alert set to the Rick Roll song. Permanently.
Agent Corolla, Department of Sufficiently Advanced Technology.
[So... nothing like having my old ex-self-insert throw a tantrum to spark an interesting RP. I sparked the Blackout in a similar way, and I am not sorry.] -
[Dang, I kinda messed up Agent!Sergio's letter] by
on 2015-08-19 15:37:00 UTC
Link to this
[It was a bit too aggressive, wasn't it? Maybe should've have had Corolla bring out the issue from the start, as she got it better and did indeed know Rina personally.
Agent!Sergio had his reasons for going "THAT IDIOT SUNFLOWER", a couple still spoilers (my mistake here), especially out of the fear that the same could happen to Corolla or any other of the friends he made in the PPC if he didn't take the matter in his own hands, but going this far is too far for him.
So, thoughts on this poor Boarder's mishap? I think I can learn something from this] -
((Some thoughtses.)) by
on 2015-08-19 15:48:00 UTC
Link to this
((-- ah, drop the brackets.))
1/ There will always be characters who disagree. If Agent Sergio had said 'I think this was a bit sub-par on behalf of the Flowers, what what? Perhaps a politely-worded letter of complaint should be worked up'... Dafydd would still have given much the same response. ;)
2/ Equally, you're always going to have agents who think the Flowers are justified in whatever they do, so don't try to get EVERYONE on your side. To some extent, you/he overstated the situation in an effort to make more people go 'gasp how terrible' - someone pointed out that they did actually complete the mission, so Sergio's claim that they couldn't was patently wrong. ^^
3/ If you want to get Boarders to make something in-universe happen... don't make it too dramatic. People are far more likely to get on board with, say, a protest outside the SO's office, than a demand that they start bombing the Flowers. Tune it right, and you can make something in-universe happen, which is always fun.
4/ Keep an eye on your characters! I've recently had to retcon most of Mortic's interactions with Scapegrace's DW agents, because he wandered out of character and into self-parody. Don't let a single note - 'Sergio doesn't trust the Flowers' - drown out the rest of what makes up the character. That's... probably one of the most important skills a writer can learn.
5/ Sorry, who started the Blackout? I seem to recall the Board being blacked out having something to do with it... ^~
hS -
Thank you. by
on 2015-08-19 16:04:00 UTC
Link to this
1) and 2) That's for sure. Never imagined a 100% revolt against the Flowers, 'cause that isn't healty for the PPC.
3) The protest outside the SO office was indeed the plan - as those who were in yesterday's chat can testimony. Agent!Sergio's letter was supposed to be the spark - but instead of a spark I wrote an explosion.
4) Yeah, one of the reason I went "What have I done" is because, with a cooler mind, I realized that this is too far - probably right into Chaotic Evil when the character is actually between Chaotic Good and Neutral Good. I let my emotions about LMM get the better of me - that is something I have to learn from, too.
5) But if I didn't start the RP with my Agents' message to DoSAT there would've been no Blackout interlude, right?... Right?. -
(STORY PLUG) So, a certain Former Agent apologizes... by
on 2015-08-19 20:58:00 UTC
Link to this
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1iY1iEQbwOwwbwC0ITAIKxPPdXGrPoHbCgCWoA4ah9zo/pub
Everything can be fixed by a squeaky rubber mallet.
(Might still contain some error - I kinda wanted to post it today.) -
To: Former Agent Turbo by
on 2015-08-19 14:39:00 UTC
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Before you ask, I am out of the bacta tank with (mostly) regrown skin, and Medical is working on grafts for what the tank was unable to finish. Thank you for your concern period backup um delete? AUGH, forget it.
My apologies for that mess, I am stuck dictating this as I'm currently bedridden and not able to move much of anything right now.
Oh, so you just stop talking to get the period, okay. Backup. Backup! Delete!
Augh, again, I am sorry.
Moving on to the main part of your message, I didn't see anyone raising a stink over the Flowers' treatment of agents when Rina and I were sent into Rose Potter and Rina—still a child by human standards—was essentially killed. Sure, everyone was all 'ooh, look at the new Time Lord!' but not one of you raised any objections to sending her and myself (then a rookie agent barely into my first week) into a six-part Legendary with no backup, that culminated in my partner getting hit with a puncturing curse that left her entrails all over the floor, then subsequently having to regenerate because our primary remote activator had been broken in the fight with Rose and I would have been unable to get her to Medical in time to save her.
But no. Now, because Rina has snapped, and stolen a TARDIS, suddenly everyone is interested in our case. Yes, I realized she was starting to go insane, and maybe if I'd been more adamant about her going to FicPsych, none of this would have happened. But while I am not entirely blameless, from things I picked up on, she was never quite stable to begin with, I don't think. She alluded to being locked up in a mental hospital once before and when I questioned her further on the subject, she became hostile and refused to say any more on the matter. As best I can figure, it was not a pleasant experience for her and one she was not eager to repeat.
Her refusal to go to FicPsych was ultimately her decision, and while—while it is reg-grettable [sobbing noises]
No, no, delete that, delete that!
...
While it is regrettable, and I miss her a lot... There is nothing we can do, I'm afraid, but hope she comes back. Emiranlanoamar taught her well, possibly too well. From what I understand, she's beyond tracking now.
As for your threat against the Flowers, I am quite frankly appalled that you would go to such extreme lengths, especially for someone you don't even know. Perhaps you should seek assistance at FicPsych so you don't end up like my partner.
Yours,
Agent Zeb, DMS -
To: Former Agent Turbo by
on 2015-08-19 07:41:00 UTC
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Oh, wah wah wah.
So some agents took on a Legendary Badfic and had a bad time of it, did they? And what, exactly, about the word 'Legendary' made you think that wouldn't happen?
I don't remember anyone kicking up a fuss when I was KILLED in a Legendary Badfic, when my partner had to DIVE INTO MANDOS TO GET ME BACK.
So quit whinging.
~Dafydd Illian, ex-DOGA
((Who apparently has issues of one kind or another.)) -
To: Former-Agent Dafydd Illian by
on 2015-08-19 19:36:00 UTC
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Agent Dives, for all her faults (please see the attached document for a comprehensive list), is a Time Lord of no small standing. She was also in no way suitable for a mission of that magnitude, due to issues commented on in Former-Agent Turbo's original letter. That these issues were of her own making is immaterial; she was assigned this mission incorrectly, and I would urge the Continuity Council in the strongest terms to mount our own rescue and try to help her, because she is a Time Lord. Now and forever.
Agent Dives also died on a mission to a Legendary Badfic -- indeed, that is how she became a Time Lord in the first place. Her partner, noted zap cat Agent Zeb, acted to bring her back to life with the quick wit one would expect of a veteran agent; the Legendary in question, the Rose Potter hexology, was Agent Zeb's second mission.
Finally, and this is merely conjecture on my part: Rina Dives was worth saving.
You?
I have my doubts. -
((Shall I chalk this up...)) by
on 2015-08-20 07:23:00 UTC
Link to this
((... as yet another 'Scapegrace's characters all hate mine'? ^_~))
((hS)) -
((Oh, wow, the Notary doesn't like someone?)) by
on 2015-08-20 11:49:00 UTC
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((Well, stone the crows. That's never happened before. =] ))
((Also the image of Maglor being slapped down by a nasally-voiced bureaucrat was too good to pass up, in my opinion, but yeah.))
((I've got nothing further to add at this point.))
((I just think double brackets are pretty. =] )) -
(('Slapped down'?)) by
on 2015-08-20 12:45:00 UTC
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((If Dafydd was interested in replying - which he ain't - his comments would start with: 'Time Lords? Yawn. Wake me up when you hit ten thousand years old, maybe then you'll be worth talking to.'))
((The reason he's not replying is probably obvious at that point. ;))) ((
((hS)) -
((Except... no.)) by
on 2015-08-20 13:42:00 UTC
Link to this
((Time Lord society has been around longer than Maglor's species has been a species. What's that quote? "Ten million years of absolute power. That's what it takes to be really corrupt." Of course, ten million years is a little easier to achieve when you have complete mastery over time and its much-vaunted relative dimensions, but the point still stands, I think.))
((Besides, by Gallifreyan standards, the Noldorin civilisation... isn't. I know you seem to think that they wandered around with laser rifles and starships for some reason, but even accepting that outside possibility, they're backwoods hicks at best. Also, calling your barely post-feudal society "Those With Knowledge" is guaran-bloody-teed to make any Time Lord in the vicinity laugh themselves sick. Just sayin'. =] ))
((Finally - and I want to make this clear - this really isn't me having a go at you. It's just, well, Time Lords OP nerf nao, and Notary's one of the single snidest little turds working for the PPC. She'd point it out. And she'll defend her species to the hilt, because as far as she's concerned there's nothing else worth being. Not even a Noldor. =] )) -
Yeah, but... by
on 2015-08-20 13:56:00 UTC
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... he meant her personally. ^~ This isn't Noldorin arrogance you're facing: it's Feanorian arrogance, and that's a whole different ballgame.
Besides, canonically, Middle-earth was created by a boy and his dog in the Whoniverse. ^^ So, y'know, there's that.
hS -
Ah, yes, the Feanorians. by
on 2015-08-20 14:27:00 UTC
Link to this
Or, as Tree describes them, "a bunch of slack-jawed, tree-violating barbarians who once saw a shiny thing and liked it a little too much". When you combine total arrogance with a deep, deep well of self-loathing, you get her. She's horrible to a cartoonish degree, but she has an unfortunate tendency to win arguments like purely via her particular brand of charisn'tma, and she will not suffer her speciesmate to be derided by some pointy-eared catgut-botherer from a backwater planet so parochial it makes the arse-end of nowhere look like the height of urbane cosmopolitanism.
Also, yeah, forgot that happened. Whoops. =] -
If by 'particular brand of charisn'tma'... by
on 2015-08-20 14:34:00 UTC
Link to this
... you mean 'she stuffs every line so full of unpleasantness that no-one wants to continue the conversation with her', then you're demonstrating that very nicely. ^_~
hS -
By which I mean: by
on 2015-08-20 14:45:00 UTC
Link to this
It's all very well having a character who's scathing and insulting towards other characters. Dafydd would probably be mortally offended. But... I'm not, and I don't have much fun coming up with in-character reactions to flames. Much like Sergio's 'we must raze the Flowers to the ground!' message, it's possible to do something which would have a certain in-universe effect... which never happens, because the authors aren't interested in doing that.
hS -
See, that's kind of what I love about agents. by
on 2015-08-20 15:07:00 UTC
Link to this
The fact that they can spit such vitriol at each other all the time. Maybe I should have written a '90s sitcom, Iunno, but the opportunities for clever wordplay and cleverer insults are ones it hurts to pass up. I blame a childhood of Blackadder cassette tapes and Red Dwarf, personally; that and the Shakespearean insult fridge magnets. My mother hid them for years after I called a nursery teacher (who deprived me of a yoghurt, I believe) an unconscionable slimeball.
"The Sues have more advanced technology than us!"
Agent Baxter, the Albanian state washing machine company has more advanced technology than we do. Deal with it. -
((I never thought that the Notary would say that)) by
on 2015-08-19 23:20:00 UTC
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((Leaving it deliberately vague on purpouse))
-
She values Time Lords above all else. Especially herself. (nm) by
on 2015-08-20 00:10:00 UTC
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-
To: Former Agent Turbio by
on 2015-08-19 04:29:00 UTC
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Speaking as someone who lost a partner in the past, and as someone who met Rina in person early this year, I figured it would be worth providing a few choice words regarding this matter, both concerning the state of things and in response to your letter.
With respect to the incident itself, and Rina's subsequent departure, I agree to some extent that the assignment of a Legendary Badfic to a team operating without backup, be it from the DIA or from another team, was a questionable decision at best. I must note, however, that this isn't the first time this has happened - and yes, unfortunately, I speak from experience i.e. being forced to watch my partner [bleep]-ing die in front of me, in a manner so horrific that MTV wouldn't have aired it, and not being able to do anything to save him to top it off! Things like this can and will happen, even if agents are fully prepared. Rina and Zeb had more than enough preparation thanks to both sporking a different Legendary Badfic (which left behind a mess which I, my partner, and five other agent teams helped to clean up), and over thirty other missions besides, including one with a friend of mine from the DF and his partner into one of Cori Falls' fics. And yet, well, this happened. My heart goes out to everyone who knew Rina on a personal level and are impacted by their loss. In the meantime, I implore any agents unfortunate enough to have been assigned a Legendary Badfic to exercise caution on the highest level during the mission into it, and be prepared for worse than the worst at all times during such an endeavor.
As for your letter, on the other hand... I literally cannot imagine a more inappropriate and insensitive response to this situation. Literally. Cannot. I can understand that the Flowers were not entirely blameless, and that the assignment of "Little Miss Mary" to Rina and Zeb is disproportionate with respect to the latter's reporting her violation of the PPC protocol! But it came to my attention recently that Rina refused to seek psychiatric help while she still had the chance, and that she also stole the TARDIS that she used to escape HQ. I was not able to get the details of why Rina took this path, but I can't condone her actions in the aftermath of the mission. I don't mean to be demeaning, not by any means - I have the highest level of respect for Rina and her partners. But I was able to recover precisely because of the actions of the Flowers and the staff of the PPC HQ, and refusing to seek those who are willing to extend a helping hand is not a gesture I would endorse for the safety of not only Rina herself, but for others around her as well! From what I read, she was very troubled prior to the LMM incident, and if she ever comes back to HQ in the state that she was back then, this mentality will surely continue unless she reaches out the way I did.
In short, Rina will be missed by many, including myself, but I hope other agents could learn from this. The arguments that have been spawned by the LMM incident have been many, but it's worth realizing that the whole situation isn't exactly as one-sided as it may seem.
Finally, regarding your threat of violence against the Flowers... What. The. Buck. That is by far the most absurd and ridiculously ignorant response I've ever seen in my life! As noted above, the Flowers' decision to send me to FicPsych for treatment was one that ultimately helped me in the long term, and in general, I can attest to the fact that even if some of HQ's decisions aren't necessarily sensible, it's because of them that we are even able to function as agents in the first place, even if there influence is indirect! They were the ones who founded the PPC, they're the ones who help those who need help like I did, and they're the ones who ensure that the PPC continues to function both as an organization and as a community. One very notable agent leaving HQ on bad terms, partly due to her own decisions rather than the decree of her higher-ups, is no grounds for war against the Flowers by any means. And if, by some antonym of a miracle, you decide to follow through with your threat... well... Let's just say that my Rainbolt, along with plenty of other implements from more than a few of my colleagues, will have your name on it in short notice.
Sincerely, your Number One Greatest Ace Pilot in All Of Humanville,
Rayner Bowerman Blitzkrieg the 20 Percent More Awesome, DMS
[And while I'm at it, is everyone who's registered for the Rose Potter cleanup interlude busy or something? Please let me know via e-mail if and when we can resume working on it!] -
To: Former Agent Turbo by
on 2015-08-19 03:13:00 UTC
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Former Agent Turbo:
Although I do not personally know the individuals involved in these recent controversies, I have heard a great deal about the events as of late. I have, however, done some research into the matter, and I believe your intentions here are entirely out of line.
Now, while I can relate to the pain your companion must be going through in the loss of her friend, I must remind you that Agent Dives understood the risk of this job. She has not only completed, but publically released mission reports for a variety of continua, including the infamous Rose Potter (which is a fiasco in and of itself - Dives is no stranger to controversy, but I digress). She has already completed a mission of Legendary status - and not only did she complete it, she came out stronger than before. With such a track record of success, who would be a better choice for a mission of the same caliber? Dives had already proven to be up to the task, after all.
According to the declassified report released recently, the Legendary-status mission "Little Miss Mary" had actually been completed at the time of the incident. Although Agent Zeb was wounded in action, he made it back to Medical safely. Your assertion that she was unfit to complete the mission falls short when you consider that she had already succeeded. Her subsequent actions of breaking into a DoSAT storage lockup and stealing highly-sensitive technology is completely unjustified, and your expectation of a rescue team is, quite frankly, preposterous. This is not the rescue of an agent - it is the capture of a thief and a renegade.
In response to your terroristic threat of a "daisycutter", I have reported this correspondence to the Department of Internal Affairs. The jobs we do carry great responsibility, and if you are not able to handle the conditions? You should not be allowed to meddle in the affairs of these worlds.
If we ever meet, rest assured that I will have a multitude of ways to counteract any violent intentions you may have towards our employers.
Regards,
Bosh'Guk, Ogre Magi of the Stonemaul Clan -
GUK WANTS TO SAY SOMETHING TOO by
on 2015-08-19 03:21:00 UTC
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BOSH SAYS WE MIGHT GET TO CHASE DOWN SOMEONE IN A SPACESHIP
I WANT TO GO
PICK ME
I CAN HOLD MY BREATH REALLY GOOD
I HOPE THEY GIVE US GUNS -
Re: Threatening message by
on 2015-08-19 03:06:00 UTC
Link to this
Former Agent Turbo,
Firstly, let it be known that Internal Affairs is investigating Agent Dives' case as per procedure. An agent has deserted the organization, stolen a valuable piece of technology during her escape, and is no doubt interfering with a Word World as we speak. The crimes Agent Dives is charged with are severe and carry the possibility of expulsion from the PPC if ever she is apprehended. There is no rescue team to retrieve her. This is a manhunt. You are welcome to participate in it if you so wish-- if you know of a way to track a renegade TARDIS commanded by an expert and paranoid pilot in a massive Word World please let us know.
Secondly, why this particular case? You don't seem particularly concerned with the twenty-odd other agents that went insane last week, or the fifteen the week before that. Furthermore, I will have you know that Agent Dives has obstinately refused to seek treatment for her stress problems. What were we supposed to do? Arrest her and force her to go to FicPsych as she kicks and screams and rages against us? Tie her down as the Nurses cram pills down her throat? The Flowers expect agents to use the services available to them in order to avoid slipping into insanity. If said agent completely refuses to seek treatment and embraces a self-destructive behaviour, there is nothing we can do except stop them when they will snap. Unless you suggest that every agent submits to a quasi-Orwellian surveillance program to monitor their mental health, we can only continue to promote FicPsych's services and stop agents who have crossed the line.
Thirdly, let it be known that DIA takes every threat of violence against PPC personnel very seriously. If you act, you will be stopped.
Inspector Ananda Chandra, Department of Internal Affairs -
To: Former Agent Turbio by
on 2015-08-19 02:27:00 UTC
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Dear (Former) Agent Turbio,
My partner and I did not have the pleasure of meeting Agent Dives, but I have read of her exploits. Whatever mission there may be to help her, Jesse and I will take part in it. These Flowers do not seem like capable rulers to me.
- Agent Alleb -
To: Former Agent Turbo by
on 2015-08-18 23:10:00 UTC
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Salutations!
I'll be frank since I've no patience for claptrap now. You don't seriously expect sentient flowers to understand what's going on in the average agent's brain as they slog through badfic after badfic after badfic, do you? They don't even make an attempt to understand. Frankly, the conditions here are bad and any sensible cop would have already brought the Flowers That Be before a court for their negligence.
Even if the Flowers don't ignore this — they might, who knows — what do you suggest to do? Rina picked up a TARDIS and up-and-vanished. She's on a Time-and-Space machine without a tracker. How the [censored] are we supposed to find her? Admittedly, I'd like to find her very much, but thankfully Navare dropped a Bind on me before I did something stupid.
So, please, don't go around making the situation worse, OK?
~Agent Desdendelle, Floaters -
To: Agent Desdendelle by
on 2015-08-19 02:44:00 UTC
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Hello,
I'm afraid I can't disagree with your thoughts on the Flowers. They're... amoral, to say the least. But here has to be a way to find Agent Dives. We've created portals, resurrected fanwriters, harnessed plotholes! It can't be that hard to track and retrieve a single TARDIS. Gosh, call the Doctor if we have to; we can just neuralyze him afterwards. We have great minds here, not to mention the rest of the multiverse. There's got to be a way.
- Agent Michael -
To: Agent Michael by
on 2015-08-19 10:14:00 UTC
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Who are you and how did you hack this correspondence?
Last time I checked, I did not CC anybody to my ICEP message to former agent Turbo.
~Agent Desdendelle -
Re: Agent Desdendelle by
on 2015-08-19 12:57:00 UTC
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[O_O I made a gaff. I apologize... Now to find an in-universe explanation...]
That... would be Mia. She showed me a message and told me to reply, so I did. She must have hacked you, but I don't know why.
As to who I am, I'm just a random Floater. -
To: Agents Michael, Mia (CC: DIA-Patrol) by
on 2015-08-19 19:04:00 UTC
Link to this
Random or otherwise, need I tell you (or your partner) that what she did is a Bad Thing? Sufficient to say, I am not amused; I also have forwarded this conversation to the DIA. Consider this an example of proper, law-abiding agent behaviour.
~Agent Desdendelle
PS: I don't know which continuum you're from, but Heroic Willpower doesn't work here, or in the Whoniverse for that matter. I hope you are not suggesting we will forsake our Duty for the sake of one agent. (Yes, she is a good friend of mine. No, I am not willing to risk the whole of reality for her sake. I'm a bit too cold for that.) -
To: Agent Desdendelle by
on 2015-08-20 23:42:00 UTC
Link to this
SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS
Uh, I think she knows. She just doesn't care. Mia's a bit strange.
I'm from World One, and I'm not suggesting that we forsake the Duty. Not completely. I'm just saying that there has to be a way to track a TARDIS. They're sentient, right? Could a Time Lord or another TARDIS get a message to her ship to bring her back?
-- Agent Michael
((Again, I apologize for my mistake. If you don't like the back-and-forth, feel free to break it off. I like doing it, personally, but it's your call.)) -
To: Agent Michael by
on 2015-08-21 12:09:00 UTC
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SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS
Calling the Doctor, using him to find Rina, and neuralysing him afterwards makes us no better than the Sues. That is what you suggested, no?
Also, I'd reckon there's a reason DoSAT slaps trackers on its fleet — I'd surmise that they are nigh-impossible to track without them. As to getting a message to the TARDIS... well, I'm no TARDIS engineer — you'd want the Ruby Shipwright for that — but I do know my canon and I don't remember people directly communicating with a TARDIS from across time and space and dimensions.
So please, stop suggesting silly things and stop making things worse.
~Agent Desdendelle
((I'm enjoying this, but Agent!Des is pissed off. I'm not my character.)) -
To: Agent Desdendelle by
on 2015-08-21 21:12:00 UTC
Link to this
SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS
I'm not sure how your post ended up on my console -- probably the usual technical faults -- but judging by your message it seems as if a Time Lord agent has gone even more eccentric than usual. (I'm not surprised. Take them away from the Capitol, and they all immediately start acting strange!)
Anyway, to answer your point about tracking and communicating with TARDISes in canon...
-- The Daleks tracked the Doctor's TARDIS in The Chase.
-- The Daleks and the Monk tracked the Doctor's TARDIS, and vice versa, in The Daleks' Master Plan.
-- The Celestial Toymaker tracked and captured the Doctor's TARDIS in the story that bears his name.
-- The Elders tracked the Doctor's TARDIS in The Savages.
-- The Great Intelligence tracked and nearly captured the Doctor's TARDIS in The Web of Fear.
-- The Time Lords tracked and nearly captured the Doctor's TARDIS (and only didn't capture it because they wanted to force him to return of his own - ahem - free will) in The War Games.
-- The Doctor tracked and followed the Master's TARDIS, despite not even having a working TARDIS of his own, in The Time Monster.
-- The Time Lords were able to divert the Doctor's TARDIS to Karn in The Brain of Morbius.
-- The Time Lords sent a recall signal to all TARDISes in The Hand of Fear/The Deadly Assassin.
-- The White Guardian diverted the Doctor's TARDIS to His domain in The Ribos Operation.
-- The Time Lords sent a message to the Doctor's TARDIS in Full Circle.
-- The Keeper of Traken found and projected himself aboard the Doctor's TARDIS in the story of the same name.
-- Other people from Traken sent a message to the Doctor's TARDIS in Logopolis.
And that's just from the first four Doctors' eras. Going by canon, it should be possible to track a TARDIS.
However, most of these involve the Doctor's TARDIS and may rely on specific flaws in the Type 50 design. And if you're talking a TARDIS that fought in the Time War, it may have been specifically protected against tracking and interception.
~Agent Sean Bellman.
--
((BTW the comments in the opening paragraph aren't intended to be disrespectful of Ix's amazing story. They're just to show that for most of HQ, this isn't a big grimdark SRS BSNS tragedy that's engulfing everyone.)) -
To: Agent Bellman by
on 2015-08-21 22:45:00 UTC
Link to this
SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS
For crying out loud. I'm gonna need to get DoSAT again.
Anyway & as I've said: we can't use any canon beings (such as the Celestial Toymaker) for this end — that's what Suvians do. So the question is, do we have any Time Lord or Dalek (or Trakenian) tech that can do the same? I'm inclined to think that if DoSAT would have had any such thing we wouldn't be sitting here exchanging ICEP messages about it; we'd be hearing about Rina's trial.
~Agent Desdendelle -
To: Agent Desdendelle by
on 2015-08-22 11:51:00 UTC
Link to this
Don't worry Des, I'm on the way to solve your console's problem!
... Yes, I just received one of your messages on my tablet. Must be some glitch in the ICEP client's addressing mask, it will take only a couple of minutes. I hope. -
Actually, the Doctor's TARDIS was a Type 40. :) (nm) by
on 2015-08-21 22:24:00 UTC
Link to this
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My,I mean, Sean's finger must've slipped when he typed that (nm) by
on 2015-08-21 22:31:00 UTC
Link to this
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To: Agent Desdendelle by
on 2015-08-21 12:45:00 UTC
Link to this
SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS
But we've done that before, haven't we? An agent called the Doctor for help during the Blackout.
People have communicated with the Doctor in other peculiar ways. Psychic paper and phones have been used before; why not now? Surely, in the entirety of Agent Dives's TARDIS, there's a phone. And I don't remember humans being turned into Time Lords in the canon, but that happened as well.
-Agent Michael
((Cool! Just wanted to make sure.)) -
To: Agent Michael by
on 2015-08-21 16:31:00 UTC
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SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS
The fact that it was done before does not make it legitimate.
Look, I'm not gonna sit here arguing this with you. I'd like to believe it's possible to bring Rina back but it simply doesn't look like that.
~Agent Desdendelle -
((Whoops, author field should have Michael's name.)) (nm) by
on 2015-08-19 13:00:00 UTC
Link to this
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P.P.S. This mail has been forwarded to all HQ personnel too. (nm by
on 2015-08-18 17:54:00 UTC
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Bummer, didn't re-read well enough. by
on 2015-08-18 17:40:00 UTC
Link to this
*catches mini-Agent Nikki CHerrifower*
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New interlude! by
on 2015-08-18 18:29:00 UTC
Link to this
In which the Reader and the Librarian go for a walk after a Continuity Council meeting, and end up reading in the library.
Metaphorically.
Set soon before the Little Miss Mary mission. -
Quite enjoyable! by
on 2015-08-18 19:13:00 UTC
Link to this
It's kind of nice to see this side of the Librarian, when his barriers are down more than usual. It's also pretty cool to see inside the Time Lord subculture of HQ, too - while the PPC as a whole is very inclusive, the groups within it might not be. It's very interesting to me, at least. Fantastic work on this, and can't wait to see what comes next.
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You know my opinion but... by
on 2015-08-18 19:06:00 UTC
Link to this
"...and ended up reading in the library."
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I hate to poke again... by
on 2015-08-18 18:41:00 UTC
Link to this
...but is OFU² still on or is it cancelled?
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*perks up ears* by
on 2015-08-19 01:17:00 UTC
Link to this
I heard OFU. ¿Qué es esto?
-
Work in progress by
on 2015-08-19 11:59:00 UTC
Link to this
Apparently, in the course of time, the concept of fanfiction universities attracted some writers who lack the necessary competence or may be truly evil, finding too much joy in torturing the students while not actually teaching them anything, or concentrating on school pranks while not showing the students learning anything. Thus, some boarders, who may also be administrators of successful fanfiction universities, joined to create the "Official Fanfiction University of Official Fanfiction Universities", or OFU-squared.
Someday we will certainly be able to read it.
HG -
I look forward to it! (nm) by
on 2015-08-19 12:54:00 UTC
Link to this
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That would be... by
on 2015-08-19 11:34:00 UTC
Link to this
... The Official Fanfiction University of Official Fanfiction Universities AKA OFU2 (or OFU-Squared if you can't be bothered with superscript). It's an OFU for prospective OFU coordinators.
Our first lecture series will be released... er... when we get it edited. If you have been involuntarily accepted as a student... watch your back. The minis like to creep up on you. ^_^
hS -
Ooh, cool! by
on 2015-08-19 12:53:00 UTC
Link to this
If you need an extra prospective coordinator, I can tell you all you need to know about Tai'shar.
Unfortunately, my computer is flagging the website; it says it has adult content. :/ My computer does that sometimes. -
... za? by
on 2015-08-19 13:17:00 UTC
Link to this
Uh... I'm pretty sure there's no adult content on the OFUDisc Files, since I wrote every word on there...
This is another copy of the OFU-Squared Welcome Message. At present, OFU-Squared stories aren't planned to actually feature students, but thank you for the offer!
hS -
Oh, my computer just does that sometimes. by
on 2015-08-19 18:10:00 UTC
Link to this
Once it even blocked a post I had made on the Board.
Yay, new link! Thanks!
If there's anything else I can do, let me know! -
Good question. by
on 2015-08-18 20:25:00 UTC
Link to this
I went through and SPG&consistency edited chapters 1-4 of 5, and left questions for the other authors; has anyone gone in and answered them? Has anyone taken it on themselves to do an editing job on chapter 5, or has that one been left for me too?
hS -
I, er, haven't. On all counts. by
on 2015-08-18 23:47:00 UTC
Link to this
I'll put that back on my immediate list. Should be fun.
~DF -
I now have. by
on 2015-08-19 09:54:00 UTC
Link to this
All five segments have been edited and commented for everything I can think of. I'll put together a hub-page to share with all of you, to make the links easy to find.
I've got comments in all the chapters directed at specific people, plus you can still make general changes as you like. Enjoy!
hS
-
(Un)Intelligence: Wire tap [SPOILERS FOR LITTLE MISS MARY] by
on 2015-08-18 21:21:00 UTC
Link to this
In the wake of the debacle that was Little Miss Mary, HQ has been abuzz with chatter. Some internal documents have been retrieved from the HQ datanet for your viewing convenience...
>Login
>>BOARD OVERRIDE DETECTED, GRANTING FULL ACCESS
>>>DIA Datanet/[[OVERRIDE]]/Today/Special Response/Officers/Section 9/Terabyte/Debriefings/FILE00132
>>Play audio log
Inspector Chandra: Tell us about the incident.
Terabyte: The theft occurred in at the beginning of our shift. My partners, Emiranlanoamar and Naya’Keegan, were busy talking to Agent Reader, from DIC. She was visiting us; she and Emiranlanoamar like to discuss Gallifreyan culture and science. Once we received the call, we grabbed our gear and quickly made our way to the DoSAT TARDIS storage.
C: Mhmm. What happened there?
T: We arrived by portal in the DoSAT’s TARDIS storage area. We located the lot where the stolen TARDIS was located. We encountered Agent Abaddon in the storage area. Upon being questioned, he told us that Alex Dives, brother of Agent Dives, was present when she left Headquarters.
C: What was this Abaddon doing there?
T: Looking for a technician to repair his console, ma’am.
C: In a TARDIS storage area?
T: He heard crying and went to investigate. He found Alex Dives on the floor, crying and holding a the stolen TARDIS' tracking device.
C: Hrm. All right then. I'll need to send a team to follow up on Abaddon's case, then. What of Alex Dives? Did either of you interact with him?
T: Affirmative. Naya was sent to bring Intern Dives in for questioning at Central. Meanwhile, Emiranlanoamar needed to track the missing TARDIS as fast as possible. He skipped over locating Alex in favour of moving to the New Caledonia TARDIS docks for his rescue attempt.
C: Ah yes, the emergency requisition. We delivered a TARDIS to New Cal. Since Agent Dives was not apprehended, I can see that it didn’t work. Why?
T: Every PPC TARDIS is a clone of the original. Emiranlanoamar theorized that the clones might share a memory of each others’ “future” — if he could catch a glimpse of the stolen TARDIS’ flight path, we could intercept Agent Dives and bring her back to Headquarters. Once he had pulled the time machine from hibernation, he immediately went to work—
C: Sorry — TARDISes hibernate?
T: Affirmative. They are living machines. When the Macrovirus Epidemic and the Mary Sue Invasion ended, they were put in storage in DoSAT. Since we do not have the proper resources or training to efficiently field a TARDIS fleet, they were mothballed and put in storage.
C: I see. We need to do something about them, then: having them lying around like that is a liability. I’m sure DoSAT would appreciate stripping them down for technology and materials too. Anyways, you were telling me about the Guardsman’s attempted intervention, yes?
T: Yes. Emiranlanoamar accessed the TARDIS timeline and found a point of interest. He extrapolated the data and managed to track the startup cycle for the stolen TARDIS — accelerated by a fast-time field in order to allow for an almost-immediate takeoff — and then the dematerialization. Unfortunately, Agent Dives used a complex trick to mask her demat signature. We were unable to track her. There is no way to know where she went. The Whoniverse, ostensibly, but trying to pinpoint her location in a universe where time and space are easily navigable is an impossible task.
C: Who taught her how to fly? Piloting a TARDIS is not common knowledge in this place.
T: My partner, Emiranlanoamar.
C: Why?
T: Agent Dives and Emiranlanoamar were close. He wanted to please her and satisfy her curiosity. He built a dummy TARDIS and she trained on it along with Agent Reader.
C: Hrm. [Keyboard keys clacking] We will have to investigate him for that.
T: He has already volunteered his headcam memories in order to clear his name. At no point in time did we suspect Agent Dives would steal a TARDIS and escape from Headquarters. I was present for every lesson, ma’am. I can support his testimony.
C: Noted. Thank you for your time, Constable. You are dismissed.
T: Acknowledged. Good day, Inspector.
>>>Medical Department Records/Profiles/DIA/Special Response/Time Lords/Guardsman, the/Bills/Today/Treatment_21314
Description: Patient came in with a heavily injured left hand. Could not move fingers at all. Severe lacerations, multiple broken bones, and metal, silicon, and bio-coral fragments embedded in his hand.
Cause of injury: Driving a fist through a TARDIS console.
Treatment: Removal of debris and use of a Medi Gun to set bones and mend skin.
Nurse: Nicole Roy
Payment: DIA Fee Waiver -
[REDACTED] had quite an impact by
on 2015-08-19 12:27:00 UTC
Link to this
Can AI’s become so upset that they forget their grammar?
The theft occurred in at the beginning of our shift.
He found Alex Dives on the floor, crying and holding a the stolen TARDIS' tracking device.
HG
[Nameless Admin edit: There are almost certainly still people who haven't read LMM. Let's keep the spoilers out of the subject line, shall we? Nameless Admin Spoiler Protection Protocols are now in force.] -
Oh, fiddlesticks. by
on 2015-08-19 19:02:00 UTC
Link to this
There's always a mistake or two that gets by. Curse you, lack-of-edit-function-on-the-Board!
Thanks for reviewing, HG. It's always appreciated! -
[Sorry, I forgot.] (nm) by
on 2015-08-19 13:00:00 UTC
Link to this
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Okay, yes, perfect. by
on 2015-08-19 02:12:00 UTC
Link to this
I love this. Especially the unexpected feels, darn you. The beginning was sad enough.
Basically, well done :D Any other opinions of mine, you already know.
~DF
-
Permission Request Episode IV: A New Hope by
on 2015-08-18 22:20:00 UTC
Link to this
No jokes this time. Serious stuff. No jokes, funny pictures, or silly dialogues. We're serious.
.
.
.
.
... Why the hell I thought I could do it?
MOVING ON! Here is my yet another Request, but first of all - it's appreciation time!
I'd like to thank all of my fabulous Betas:
- Irish Samurai
- Voyd
- SMF
- Herr Hieronymus Graubart
- Seafarer
- Pippa's Ghost
- Iximaz
Okay, I'm delaying it way too long, here we go:
- Agents of RC 42-Omega
- Prompts
Chosen Badfic
Nothing more to add... Let's just get this over with. -
Of course, I HAD TO mess something up! by
on 2015-08-18 23:20:00 UTC
Link to this
Tira, I am so sorry for not including you in the Beta list. In fact, you're one of my first Betas and you helped me out a lot. I am so sorry!
-
Waaaaait... by
on 2015-08-19 22:22:00 UTC
Link to this
I'm pretty sure I beta'd as well. That maaaay have been an elaborite hallucination.
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...Was I drunk when I was writing that? O.o" by
on 2015-08-20 09:05:00 UTC
Link to this
Dude... bro... seriously? How could I forget!? Ooooh, this doesn't look good for me in the future. I guess I'll have to write down my betas on post-in note, from now on.
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"Write drunk. Edit sober." -- ... Someone. (nm) by
on 2015-08-20 19:34:00 UTC
Link to this
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Probably... by
on 2015-08-20 15:10:00 UTC
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...'cuz I clearly remember beta'ing the characters profiles...
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*Puts a Hat on* by
on 2015-08-18 22:48:00 UTC
Link to this
Hoom, hoom.
Activity:No, I don’t know you at allAll clear.
PPC knowledge: You know your stuff and you know how to ask.
Fic to spork: As before, kill it with fire.
Writing ability (creative): I figure William and VJ would have an interesting dynamic and the prompts are nice. They have this familiar feeling which I can’t exactly place and it’s good. Well-written.
Writing ability (technical): Well, I’d have been massively surprised if I’d have found any SPaG mistakes after six betas including the resident Greybeard and the wonderful Ix took a look at your stuff. Continue doing so — we ESLs need good betas.
So, unless another PG objects…
Permission granted, dood. Mazaltov. -
More belated congratulations by
on 2015-08-22 11:48:00 UTC
Link to this
Have a pack of sonic screws. Now you just need a sonic screwdriver to go with them...
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Congrats! by
on 2015-08-21 23:01:00 UTC
Link to this
Since everyone is giving you a present, have a future! It's always nice to have a spare one/
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Belated congratulations! *tosses confetti* (nm) by
on 2015-08-21 20:38:00 UTC
Link to this
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Congralutions! by
on 2015-08-20 18:07:00 UTC
Link to this
I only just go back here literally yesterday, so I didn't witness the other Permission attempts, but what the heck, a Boarder getting Permission is always something to celebrate, so cheers!
I honestly don't know if I was around for your introduction or not, though I remember seeing your name back when I was here last time, so have a Rorschach Book (changes automatically according to your current reading interests) -
Congrats! (nm) by
on 2015-08-19 22:20:00 UTC
Link to this
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You made it! Congratulations! by
on 2015-08-19 12:52:00 UTC
Link to this
If I had had more time, I would have liked to look over the second prompt once more, but all I would have found is one comma that should be a full stop in the penultimate paragraph.
HG -
About time! by
on 2015-08-19 04:20:00 UTC
Link to this
Seriously man, congrats. It has been a long time coming.
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*Fires Party Howitzer* by
on 2015-08-19 03:09:00 UTC
Link to this
Now get on those fics, I skimmed the first few paragraphs and now I want a party howitzer that can kill.
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Congrats, Matt! Have some milk to go with the cookie. (nm) by
on 2015-08-19 02:47:00 UTC
Link to this
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Congratulations! Have a Present! by
on 2015-08-19 02:27:00 UTC
Link to this
No, not that one!
*KABOOM* -
Congratulations! by
on 2015-08-19 01:45:00 UTC
Link to this
I knew you'd manage this time.
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WOOHOOO!! by
on 2015-08-19 01:14:00 UTC
Link to this
*tosses gold coins in the air* Good job, Matt! :D Have a cookie!
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THREE CHEERS FOR MATT! by
on 2015-08-18 23:27:00 UTC
Link to this
Hip-hip, hooray! Hip-hip, hooray! HIP-HIP, HOORAY! =D
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Congratulations! (nm) by
on 2015-08-18 23:14:00 UTC
Link to this
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Congrats! *tosses Spikes* (nm) by
on 2015-08-18 23:08:00 UTC
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. . . by
on 2015-08-18 23:00:00 UTC
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.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
OOOOH... that felt good!
Seriously though, thanks... -
Congratulations! (nm) by
on 2015-08-19 08:39:00 UTC
Link to this
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Celebrations for days! And weeks! And YEEEEARS! (nm) by
on 2015-08-18 22:55:00 UTC
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*cakefetti* by
on 2015-08-18 22:50:00 UTC
Link to this
Hey, hey! Congratulations, man! I knew you could do it! :D
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Two interludes in one day? by
on 2015-08-19 01:54:00 UTC
Link to this
Of course. You guys probably need a break from the feels, so here's some fluff.
Des and Dawn drink tea. Fluff ensues. Set before LMM. -
Awesome! (nm) by
on 2015-08-20 20:03:00 UTC
Link to this
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This was really sweet. by
on 2015-08-19 15:04:00 UTC
Link to this
"Awwww"-inducing levels of sweet. I'm sold, shipping these two right now.
Wait, is it still shipping if they are already in a relationship? -
Yes, it is! by
on 2015-08-19 15:33:00 UTC
Link to this
It’s a gun boat – ah, sorry, a canon ship.
HG
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A Serious Dilemma by
on 2015-08-19 03:12:00 UTC
Link to this
I am considering leaving the PPC. Let me explain.
Something about the missions just sits wrong with me.
I feel that the missions are not the best way to educate the masses on writing well. More specifically, we don't write a mission for a badfic that's really for the author's education. I feel that while we don't outright flame, we are mocking people who have not learned to write decently.
We are the ones who carry out executions as if we have the sole right; as if we are assuming that the badfic authors will never listen to good advice. But as I (and probably a few others) know, a story can be rubbish for a long time, and yet not always be the fault of the author. I wrote an Angst!Sue that lasted 19 chapters because only one reviewer came along and told me I was doing something wrong. Everyone else just said it was a good story.
The thing is, I understand the adrenaline rush of disgust at people getting it wrong and heartily wanting to see it fixed. But I still feel like we're making little hatefics against the badfics. We're being purely judgmental. I'd feel better writing a mission if we asked the badfic writer if they'd be willing to listen to constructive criticism, and then doing the mission if they said no.
All in all, I'm starting to feel that the PPC is most likely not the best group for me to be involved in. -
I see what you're saying. by
on 2015-08-19 14:56:00 UTC
Link to this
I don't think the PPC really does anything to help people outside the PPC write better. Those of us doing the sporking--yeah, we learn a lot from it. Many of us spork our own old shames.
What we're doing is more like MST3K than anything educational. We don't notify the people whose stories we're making into parodies. Some missions--the Legendaries, and some of the bleepfics and squickfics--really deserve to be parodied and "killed". Think of the recent "Little Miss Mary" mission, for example: That mission doesn't have very much to do with encouraging better writing; it has everything to do with saying, "Glorifying pedophilia is NOT COOL. Let me show you exactly now non-cool it is."
Sporking an honest effort by a likely young writer, a Mary Sue usually, can be anywhere from hostile to nearly affectionate. I guess it depends on the writer, and what kind of agents they're writing. Personally, if I ever start writing missions, I'm probably going to go at it like, "Yipe, this Mary Sue sucks. Poor baby writer; you'll be embarrassed later. I used to do that too." Because I did. My Mary Sue was an Animorphs 'sue who was the daughter of The Ellimist and literally omnipotent. Yes, really. Oh, and a fighter pilot who was taking calculus at the age of twelve.
I think you have to follow your conscience. Whatever we do here, we shouldn't hurt real people doing it. Whether that means leaving the PPC altogether, writing about untangling bad writing, focusing on the truly reprehensible fics, or writing mostly interludes, you have to be true to what you believe is right.
Personally, I think I want to start writing missions soon, but I want to do it in a way that makes it clear that the PPC, in-universe, is killing 'Sues and exorcising wraiths, instead of just squashing entire universes or promoting universal quarantines, because the writers who write those 'Sues will someday mature into goodfic writers who will strengthen the continua we all love. In the meantime, we do damage control: Kill the 'Sue because her writer, years later, will write goodfic, and it's worth the effort. -
That's a good question. by
on 2015-08-19 10:25:00 UTC
Link to this
I know, it wasn't a question - but it was, really.
There are two main purposes of the PPC - entertainment, and education. I think you know why it's entertaining, so I won't dwell on that. ^_~
But education... aye, there's the rub. Who are we meant to be educating? As you say, writing stories murdering their fics is not a good way to teach authors.
But does it teach other people? I know I learnt a lot about what makes characters bad from reading PPC missions. I know we've had a lot of people come here over the years saying 'I used to write Mary-Sues, but then I found the PPC...'. So I think, really, it does educate - but not the badfic's author.
You've put forward the idea that some (most?) writers of bad fanfiction would improve if they knew they needed to. That definitely didn't used to be the case! Back when the PPC was all about LotR, almost every fic missioned was of the 'if you don't like, don't read/any negative comments are flames!' variety. That's not a parody we created - that's a thing that actually happened, and happened a lot.
But have things changed? I don't know - you tell me! If you think authors of the badfics that get posted on the Board would listen to constructive criticism - why not go and give it? You don't need to mention the PPC, but just reading through their story and providing that concrit - who knows? It might even work.
That goes for everyone, actually: if you're willing to read fics in order to write missions, why not leave a review along the way? It's not going to hurt you! Obviously that doesn't apply to old, abandoned fics, but the ones that are still ongoing... well, why not?
~
One more thing (there's always one more thing...): are we 'mocking people who have not [yet] learned to write decently'? I certainly hope not! Mocking their stories, yes; even mocking their writing. But not them.
hS -
If I remember correctly by
on 2015-08-19 16:41:00 UTC
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Araeph mentioned in the A/N to one of her missions that she personally leaves concrit first, then missions if the concrit goes nowhere. I think that that would be a good practice to emulate, at least in part: if the fic isn't clearly abandoned, give at least some concrit (you don't have to be exhaustive), and if the author is receptive, good! If not, spork away.
-
I did indeed take a fic off the "kill list" vfor this reason by
on 2015-08-19 16:16:00 UTC
Link to this
I left some concrit, and the author wrote me back wanting for more, to the point they decided to re-do the whole story taking at heart my suggestions.
Don't know if the rewrite did actually happen - didn't hear anything from the author for a while, and after quite a bit there was still no trace of the rewrite anywhere, but the intent to improve alone is enough for me to consider the sporkign pointless and in bad taste from that point onwards. -
I used to leave concrit on stories. by
on 2015-08-19 15:07:00 UTC
Link to this
And they weren't even stories I was missioning! I got lucky in that the first author I left a review for took my advice to heart and actually asked me to beta--which I gladly did--but the rest... reacted less than graciously.
Me: "Hey, just popping in to say this story has a good premise and a lot of potential, but perhaps you could try toning down your OC's power level--"
Author: "MY STORY IS PERFECT AND YOUR A FLAMER GTFO NOOB"
That's basically how the rest of the interactions went. After a while, I just gave it up as a bad job and went back to sporking. At least writing missions (though it takes more effort than writing a review) is more entertaining for me, and helps me get better at writing. And considering I plan on making a career out of my writing, I don't want to be known as the next Stephenie Meyer or the next Cassandra Clare.
Speaking of them, is it mean to criticize, MST, spork, and otherwise riff on those works of 'professional' literature? Or does it make it okay to spork because they're getting paid for their bad writing? Where do you, Silent, think we should draw the line? Or is sporking anything just flat-out amoral?
Just something to think about. -
I'm adding concrit to the end of my missions. by
on 2015-08-19 14:58:00 UTC
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Or at least, I plan to continue doing so. (I got the idea from you and SkarmorySilver, so thanks for that.) I figure if I leave concrit I won't come across as a callous jerk and cause some poor soul elsewhere to have a minor breakdown. (That happened to me once. The reviewer was right, of course, but I still felt hurt that she hadn't even paid attention to my actual story as opposed to how said story was written.)
-
Actually... by
on 2015-08-19 14:41:00 UTC
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I did try to leave concrit on fic I missioned a while back! Or was planning on missioning. I am fairly sure I've gotten... hm, three? positive results, and many more negative ones or people ignoring it. So there's my data points.
-
In fact, you know what? Money where my mouth is. by
on 2015-08-19 10:40:00 UTC
Link to this
When I wrote PPC: Driftwood, I included 'Agent Kaitlyn's Concrit' at the end of each chapter. Looking through the six missions, one is a trollfic, one is to a fic that's taken down, and one is to a long, finished story on a website I'm not terribly familiar with. But the other three are right there on Fanfiction.net.
I've now given the concrit in review direct to the authors of And So The Journey Begins, Opposite Reaction Same Result, and Bella Black. I don't know if they'll edit, or even respond, but I've done it.
Your turn.
hS -
I think you're kinda mistaken. by
on 2015-08-19 10:06:00 UTC
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We're not fandom police and we're not fandom school. We're not here to educate anybody, save, perchance, for the people who come here seeking concrit. We're writing satire here, mainly for our own and the community's amusement. The thing is, if someone went ahead and published they're fic, it's open to criticism, in whatever form.
Yes, we're being judgemental, no, that's not a bad thing, and no, we're not writing missions for the badfic writers' sake.
And, as Ix mentioned, nobody's forcing you to stay, or to write missions, or to have anything to do with the PPC. It's entirely voluntary, remember? -
Have you looked at... by
on 2015-08-19 04:13:00 UTC
Link to this
The FAQ: For Other People? Specifically, these sections?
"You just like bullying people who don't write as well as you."
I don't think there has ever been an occasion where a bullying victim chose to go to school with hair coated in maple syrup, a shirt fished out of the garbage, shoes made of bubble wrap, and vibrantly pink clown make-up; stood in the center of the schoolyard; yelled out for all to hear, "PLS REVUE MY APEARENCE!!!!!1"; and expected—nay, demanded—that no one laugh.
In all seriousness, we strongly object to the idea that putting up poor quality work in a public place is "empowering", and that to comment on the quality is "bullying". No one is making you publish your writing. No one is making you beg for reviews. If you don't like the criticism, you can ignore it, you can not accept it, you can circulate your stories in a closed community. But if you publish it on a place like fanfiction.net, you are implicitly consenting to scrutiny. And we never force anyone to leave a site for any reason, unless they are violating the TOS.
"You are a flamer!"
Politely reminding people to not be lazy asses and that they should take the time to write correctly is not harassment. It's constructive criticism and, on ff.net, it's what you agreed to do when you signed the TOS. It's also something your teachers wish you'd do so they didn't feel driven to get wasted so often because their students are illiterate numpties.
"Cowards! Why do you mock me on your own sites behind my back?"
Well, seeing as we almost always get whining when we criticize your work to your face, it's sometimes less annoying for us to keep you out of our critiques altogether. And then there's the fact that you won't LET us criticize your fic to your face. The most obvious example of this is the fate of the original PPC series. It used to be on fanfiction.net, where everybody could read it and know whose stories were being mocked. That is, before someone got offended and unjustly reported it and got it taken off, thereby causing us to relocate.
"You insulted the story/character, so in a way you insulted me!"
A Mary Sue is not a human being. A Mary Sue is a character type. It's like saying, "Storybook villains are stupid!" Authors of storybook villains may disagree, but you're not insulting a real person if you say that.
In fact, it's a common mistake of Sue-authors to believe that we are directly insulting them instead of berating their characters. There's a world of difference. One is a criticism, and one is a personal attack. You can be a smart and/or good person and still write a truly worthless story—believe me, I've seen it.
"Why don't you just give constructive criticism?"
Because the chances of badficcers benefiting from constructive criticism are slim, at best. Constructive criticism only works when:
The story in question has some merit to begin with. Before you "construct" anything, you need a foundation to construct it on. In this case, the foundation is the badficcer's basic understanding of English and the canon of a particular fandom. If there is no foundation—if the only advice we can give is, "Next time, please read the book you're supposedly a fan of!" or "Perhaps you could have a third-grader instruct you on the proper use of punctuation?"—then there's really no point in our giving criticism of the constructive kind. We are here to enjoy fanfic; we are not Remedial Writing 101.
The author actually cares about the fanfic s/he is writing. More than once, I've caught blatant admissions that the badfic authors wrote a fic down while on the phone, in class, or watching TV. If that's the case, we'll have put more effort into our critique than they'll have put into writing the fic in the first place. To mock such a fic will give us entertainment; critiquing it seems like a waste of our time.
The author is receptive to our critique. This is rarely the case in badfic. It's one of the many problems with creating a Mary Sue: since the Suethor identifies with the character so strongly, s/he tends to treat even slightly negative comments about said character as a terrible personal insult.
So while it's not unheard-of for us to leave constructive feedback, we don't always feel the need to waste our time honestly critiquing a story for someone who will not benefit from it and/or who did not put any effort into the story in the first place.
But, if you want to leave, that's entirely up to you. We won't try to stop you. -
[Cringes] by
on 2015-08-19 07:45:00 UTC
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Every time I run across the FAQ: For Other People, I realise all over again how rude and aggressive it is.
I think I'm going to have to rewrite it. That isn't the public face we want to be putting across.
hS -
Okay. Prospective FAQ: Others questions. by
on 2015-08-19 13:13:00 UTC
Link to this
This is a first stab at hashing out the structure of a totally-revised FAQ: For Other People.
So far, I haven't answered any of the questions. A lot of them will crib from the original; some will be entirely new. I think I've covered everything important from the original, so see what you (= everyone) think(s):
THE BASICS
What is the PPC?
What makes the PPC different from other Mary Sue Hunters?
What gives the PPC the right to do what you do?
ABOUT MISSIONS
Are PPC missions supposed to stop people writing?
What ARE PPC missions supposed to achieve?
Are PPC missions and MSTs plagiarising the original story?
Are you trying to upset the authors whose stories you kill?
Do you attack/flame the authors of badfics?
Why did you pick on my/this particular story?
But...
... fanfiction doesn't have to be canonical!
... spelling/punctuation/grammar doesn't matter if you understand it anyway!
... I just wrote this for fun!
... it's my story, so I can do what I want!
ABOUT WRITING & CRITICISM
What if an author has a learning disability?
What if an author is not a native speaker?
What is the difference between constructive criticism and flaming?
Should young/depressed/new authors not be criticised, in order to spare their feelings?
ABOUT MARY SUE
What is a Mary Sue?
Are all OFCs Mary Sues?
Are Mary Sues strong characters and role models who empower female authors/readers?
Is calling a character a Mary Sue mysogynist/anti-feminist?
Has the term 'Mary Sue' lost its meaning?
Can male characters be Mary Sues?
Can canon characters be Mary Sues?
ABOUT US
Do you think you are better people than the authors whose stories you kill?
Didn't you ever write badfic yourselves?
Should people make assumptions about you and hurl insults at you?
Why do you obsess over canon?
THE 'WHY DON'T YOU'S
Why don't you just stop reading badfics?
Why don't you write goodfic instead of attacking badfic?
Why don't you leave constructive criticism?
Why don't you tell authors about these missions?
Why do you talk about people behind their backs?
hS -
This probably works a lot better than the old FAQ. by
on 2015-08-19 15:30:00 UTC
Link to this
Amusing as the current one is, this is supposed to placate angry fanwriters, and unfortunately, sarcasm is not the best for that.
I'd be willing to help with the new FAQ if someone can help me locate my sarcasm filter. :P -
Are we really placating them, though? by
on 2015-08-19 21:53:00 UTC
Link to this
I don't disagree that the current FAQ is a little overly aggressive, and I feel that we could stand to tone it down. We're not out to rile people up, after all, and coming off like we are isn't going to help matters.
That said, nothing we put is going to convince said angry fanwriters not to be angry at us. It doesn't matter how you say it, most people aren't going to care unless you're saying what they want to hear. The other thing is, we don't come off as overly obliging. Too many Suethors already feel like they should be able to get what they want by making threats or crying. If we worry too much about not hurting their feelings, they might get the impression that they can manipulate us with them. And there's nothing more irritating than having to deal with a temper tantrum.
Personally, the tone I would advocate is "politely firm." Basically, what we need to tell them is that, yes, your writing is that bad; no, we don't really care that you're upset to be told so; and no, we're not going to change our minds about any of this. Don't make it rude or personal, that's just going to cause more offense, not less, but don't prioritize assuaging hurt feelings, either. Who knows, maybe a little tough love will even help them grow up - or at least discourage them from throwing a temper tantrum.
Also, I think a little humor isn't necessarily a bad thing, so long as it's not too aggressive. I think we should, above all, avoid billing ourselves as some kind of Fanfiction Arbiters of Taste. If the FAQ comes off as too formal, we run the risk of seeming like we think the PPC is SRS BSNS, which will give a reputation that, in my opinion, is even worse than a rude one.
Anyways, please don't necessarily take this as specific criticism of anything so much as general rambling on the issue. The word "placating" just got me thinking, and I ended up writing way more than I intended. -
Well, that's sort of the point. by
on 2015-08-20 12:21:00 UTC
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If fanbrats are determined to be offended by us, well, we can't actually stop them. What we can do, and indeed what we should do, is present ourselves in the best possible light. That means adopting a polite, conciliatory tone, which means that the whinging fanbrats look even worse when they decry us for being OMG SO MEEEN.
And yes, I'm aware of the hypocrisy of this statement coming from me, but there you are. =] -
Can we, perhaps, not use the term 'fanbrats'? (nm) by
on 2015-08-20 20:32:00 UTC
Link to this
-
The above comment has got me second guessing about something by
on 2015-08-19 04:19:00 UTC
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If I'm able to get my perms, I would like to post notices on fanfics that they have been sporked, is that legal within our community?
-
Why? by
on 2015-08-19 14:38:00 UTC
Link to this
You absolutely could let them know. However, a wise Chaos Theorist once said, "your scientists were so preoccupied with whether they could that they didn't stop to think if they should."
What would you or the badfic author stand to gain from letting them know? On your end, it wouldn't make your mission better, it wouldn't be more entertaining. What it might get you is attention that you don't want.
On the author's end, it is likely not going to be entertaining for them and they will likely not see it as educational. What they might get is hurt feelings.
All in all, not a positive outcome. What you should do, if you want to help authors write better, is leave constructive criticism in the comments on the fanfic. Just bear in mind that such comments are not guaranteed to be received positively.
-Phobos -
Let's consult the Wiki again, shall we? by
on 2015-08-19 04:26:00 UTC
Link to this
Do I tell the badfic author that I’m PPCing their fic? Aren’t they supposed to take down the story or something?
NO.
For all the fun we have, we don’t actually police the fandom, and we cannot tell people what to do. Most of these badfics are sporked without the original author ever knowing about it, and generally, it’s better that they don’t. We don’t want to start a flame war, and why hurt their feelings if we don’t have to? Showing someone that their work has been mocked so thoroughly rarely results in a positive reaction. Some PPCers do choose to politely inform the badfic author, particularly if they know the person would have a laugh rather than burst into tears, but most don’t.
Also, you never tell an author to stop writing, or take down their stories; all we can do is give them constructively critical feedback. We try to be nice people, see. -
But see, you're missing the point, Ixi. by
on 2015-08-19 14:27:00 UTC
Link to this
You put mocking something they did as separate to mocking them. But that's not entirely true.
Let's say that you imagine you have really good cooking talent. So you bake cookies, brownies etc. People tell you how good they are when they actually are horrible, and you believe them. And then someone comes and tells you the truth. That truth is going to hurt at first, won't it?
Our hobbies, what we like to do, form our identity in a way. So you can't separate the product of a tried skill from the maker so easily. When we mock their stories, we're mocking them. I know because that's how I felt when I had my first honest reviewer. It hurt for awhile. Luckily I kept my sanity enough to not lash back at him. I almost did, though. -
I know this sounds harsh... by
on 2015-08-19 22:19:00 UTC
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But it's not really our problem that they feel that way. Learning to disassociate your self-worth from your creations is an important life skill - if you go through life feeling hurt and upset because someone criticizes your work, then you're going to spend a lot of time being hurt and upset. Sure, there are lots of people out there who aren't mature enough to handle criticism, but I don't think catering to them necessarily helps anyone.
Also, you have to realize that we're not doing this to their faces. Optimally, they're never going to know if we missioned their fic. The real education is aimed at the writers we spork, but the people who read our missions, which is hopefully a completely different audience. -
Let's run with the cookie analogy. by
on 2015-08-19 15:04:00 UTC
Link to this
This is Suesette. Suesette likes making cookies.
Unfortunately, she is terrible at it.
Suesette doesn't know she's terrible at making cookies. Her family and friends all tell her they're 'lovely...'. Every time she makes them, they all get eaten.
This is Lacksidacksical. She's with the Protectors of Pastries and Cookies. Members of this 'PPC' visit cake stands and the like, seeking cookies to comment on.
Today, Suesette has decided to try and sell her cookies on a stall. By a complete coincidence, Lacksidacksical happens upon the stall. She buys a cookie. It is terrible.
Here's what Suesette would like Lacksidacksical to do:
*Tell her how wonderful her cookies are.
That isn't going to happen.
Here is what Lacksidacksical does not do:
*Tell Suesette she's a terrible person.
*Tell Suesette she's a terrible cook and should stop cooking forever.
*Tell Suesette her cookies are 'just terrible, that's all there is to it'.
*Give Suesette an exhaustative list of what's wrong with her cookies.
*Stand in front of the stall and tell people 'don't buy Suesette's cookies - they're terrible'.
*Lie to Suesette and tell her her cookies are nice. That would be dishonest.
*Just ignore it. Where's the fun in that?
Here is what Lacksidacksical does do:
*Take the conversation away from Suesette's location, so she doesn't get upset.
*Tell her friends in the Protectors of Pastries and Cookies about Suesette's terrible cookies.
*Go through the cookies methodically and sort out what's good and what's bad.
*Learn from the experience how to improve her own cookies.
*Make a pamphlet showing blown-up and humorously-annotated pictures of the worst parts of Suesette's cookies, and share it with the PPC.
Here is what Lacksidacksical might do:
*Offer Suesette some careful constructive criticism of her cookies, complementing her on the flavour, but highlighting that they're too hard to actually eat.
*Take Suesette some good cookies, to show her the difference.
*Get angry (or pretend to get angry) about how bad Suesette's cookies are. This anger could be between PPCers, or in the pamphlet.
*Eat an entire cookie in her quest to understand it better.
Is Lacksi mocking Suesette, by way of her cooking? I don't think so; she's not throwing it in her face, the way she would be either making her comments to Suesette herself, or making comments about Suesette. She's taken very clear and deliberate steps to separate the cookies from Suesette, both physically (she's taken them elsewhere) and mentally (she doesn't talk about Suesette at all). I think those two steps, combined, take her work away from mockery of Suesette, and into parody of her cookies.
As it were. I'm hungry for cookies now. ^_^
hS -
This helps...except for one thing. by
on 2015-08-19 15:09:00 UTC
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"*Give Suesette an exhaustative list of what's wrong with her cookies."
We do this through the charge list. -
But ... by
on 2015-08-19 15:41:00 UTC
Link to this
that’s why Lacksidacksical doesn’t hand her pamphlet to Suzette and we shouldn’t link the authors to mission reports.
HG -
It's not given to the author - er, cook. by
on 2015-08-19 15:29:00 UTC
Link to this
The charge list is part of the pamphlet, and the pamphlet isn't sent to Suesette.
hS -
Well by
on 2015-08-19 15:25:00 UTC
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One, those aren't sent to the authors. Two, they're usually not exhaustive. Super-long charge lists aren't fun to read, so it's best to stick to the big things.
-
We once did an exaustive charge list. by
on 2015-08-19 15:28:00 UTC
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The lenght itself was meant to be the gag, with Agents havign to take turns to read it all. But it didn't work so well because it was, well, too long.
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Well that's the thing by
on 2015-08-19 03:47:00 UTC
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We're primarily a satire group. We exist primarily to entertain the mass off the same manner that a group of people use to Roast another, singular person (I really need the watch the JB roast). That being said another of our primary goals is to help people improve their writing, whether it be in the field of Characters, Canon, Writing, or whatever other help the person needs.
And if you don't want to hurt another person's feelings you cold always start playing around in the canon of the "Anti Cliche and Mary Sue Elimination Society" (We should really try get a crossover with that group).
-
And now, the PPC's first ever Big Hero 6 mission! by
on 2015-08-19 14:33:00 UTC
Link to this
Recovering from her previous mission, Agent Sarah has a misadventure involving a confused canon, a broken C-CAD, and what may be the most adorable Disney mini to date in "You Should've Left".
NOTE: This mission occurs right after when my co-write with Edhelistar takes place in-universe, and thus long before Little Miss Mary. Hence, it has nothing to do with that particular incident or any of the repercussions thereof. -
I really liked it! by
on 2015-08-25 17:39:00 UTC
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It's pretty nice to have a breath of fresh air after all this LMM stuff. It was good, but I prefer more light-hearted writing in most cases.
Anyway, that was a pretty original mission, I kinda like the idea. (I mean, I'm not gonna use it because it kinda only works once, but still.) I'm not that fond of interacting with canons, but that's probably mostly because I can't write them right myself, and I actually kinda like how you do it. -
That was – unusual, and quite moving by
on 2015-08-20 12:17:00 UTC
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First things first:
Even Gogo peeked out of here bag offered a "There, there."
Missing word "and"?
What has Sarah found there?
A transdimensional hopper who isn’t quite a Sue? Nah, that would be an original character.
A wraith who isn’t malevolent? Nah, a wraith would possess, not replace.
I’m tempted to write the story of this interdimensional traveler, lost between the worlds, until she found this one that looked like it might become home. She had a rather good time there. But finding this guy who was quite, but not really, like her, and shoving him out to take his place, had been a bad idea, so now she has to leave. While the world fades away, she knows that, next time, she’ll have to take a greater effort to fit in. But will she ever find another world where she can fit? Will she dare returning to this same world, in some distant place where nobody knows Hiro and will wonder why he suddenly looks like a girl? May she even be able to create a world of her own, and conjure all the imaginary friends she needs? Whatever she decides, Hiroko will be a good girl now.
I abstain; I certainly would embarrass myself with all the wangst and false emotions.
HG -
Indeed so! by
on 2015-08-20 18:29:00 UTC
Link to this
The story potential for an entity like what Hiroko ultimately became is indeed enormous (especially when you consider that E.V.L. was once a malevolent version of said entity). I don't think I'd be able to do it much justice myself, though - I just wanted a mission that ended in a peaceful resolution between the Sue and the agent and this was what I ended up with.
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I liked the this mission. by
on 2015-08-20 03:21:00 UTC
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Expectially after [REDACTED] happened to [REDACTED]. Then again, I have always been a bit partial towards missions where canons and agents interact more than "look this way, please!"
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Just one small detail... by
on 2015-08-19 16:59:00 UTC
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I mentioned you during the beta process: "Jack Frost hasn't been always the Guardian of Fun and the Spirit of Winter." And you left the canon hiccup in the mission.
Remember, according to the movie, before being a Guardian, he was a mortal, and according to the upcoming book The Guardians of Childhood: Jack Frost, before being the Guardian of Fun and the youngest of the Guardians, he was the Guardian of the Man in the Moon and the First Guardian, Nightlight.
And in before you tell me they're diferent canons, by Word of God (ie.: William Joyce), the movie is set in the same canon as the books, just 300 years later. -
Aaah, I totally forgot about that! Thanks! XD (nm) by
on 2015-08-19 17:52:00 UTC
Link to this
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So far, so good by
on 2015-08-19 16:29:00 UTC
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But it seems that you're collecting agents like a Trainer collects Pokemon! Are you sure that you're going to be able to juggle all of them?
Other than that, it's a pretty good mission, and a unique premise, i.e., an Agent interacting with a canon. So far, I recall only one error in the mission:
The blade clattered to the floor, it's icy chill dissipating.
P.S.: Have you received my e-mails? -
Actually... by
on 2015-08-19 16:53:00 UTC
Link to this
I don't plan to send the Go Go replacement into any missions anytime soon unless he/she's collecting stuff for the DoSAT. He/she will be a technician, you see. Besides, I don't plan to recruit any more agents unless something really, really bad happens to the ones I have already... Eheheheh... >;)
Real Life has not at all been kind to me, I'm afraid, so I haven't been able to respond to people in general unless I'm out of the house and hanging out with friends. I will however respond to your messages as soon as I am able, don't worry! Just be patient, that's all... -
My bad, that should be "a broken RA". ^^; (nm) by
on 2015-08-19 14:53:00 UTC
Link to this
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Reintroduction by
on 2015-08-19 22:16:00 UTC
Link to this
Hi there guys, I'm finally back! I don't know if you still remember me. probably not, or if you do it is likely as that guy who had someone post a farewell thread for him. Sorry about that. That was really cold and impersonal, but I had no choice. After the thing that caused me to leave happened, I had to leave immediately so I had to do that.
Anyway, since my original introduction post is most certainly long since buried,and for the benefit of those were not around the Board at the time I wrote it, let me do it once again.
I'm James Shields, but you may call me James.
I have read every relevant introductory material, including The Original Series of course, a good deal of spin off series and plenty of the wiki pages.
I am from Brazil and my first language is Portuguese.
My main fandoms ( and those most relevant for PPC purposes, such as for future missions for when I get around to that) are Harry Potter, Nanoha, Sakura, Sailor Moon, Mass Effect and MLP FIM.
It is good to be finally back guys! I hope I am able to stay for good this time, get you all really well (and for those that were around last time, to reconnect with you all) and even get my Permission (thought that will take so time since obviously I have not been very active in the past 10 months or so). -
Hello! by
on 2015-08-20 23:30:00 UTC
Link to this
I just arrived back in May, so we've never met. Have an urple ocarina as a returnbie gift, pull up a chair, and tell me a bit more about yourself! Who's your favorite HP character?
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Hi there! by
on 2015-08-21 16:19:00 UTC
Link to this
Thank you for the returnbie gift.
Let's see: My favorite Harry Potter character is Hermione.
I am actually a softcore Harmonian and my favorite HP goodfic are The Harmony Bond, Tragedy , Harry Potter and the Nightmares of Future’s Past and Marissa and the Wizards
My least favorite HP badfics are Betrayal, Harry Potter and Future's Past, Adopted and Positive -
Ooh, thanks for the recs! by
on 2015-08-21 19:40:00 UTC
Link to this
I read more LotR than Harry Potter, but I do have a really good DW/HP crossover to offer.
Hermione is awesome! I look like her when I braid my hair and then brush it out. She's one of my favorites as well, but they change from time to time. :) -
You're welcome by
on 2015-08-21 20:50:00 UTC
Link to this
A Harry Potter and Doctor Who! crossover? Sounds interesting, though I have to admit that I don't know much about DW.
Hermione has always been my all-time favorite. She is indeed awesome :D
Which is why I dislike those badfics I listed so much. I mean, I love Hermione and I ship HHR, but those stories force her, Harry and sometimes Ron and even Dumbledore to be very different than what they should be. You will notice that all four are actually HHR fics. This is not a coincidence.
This is a case of Don't shoot the message. It is always worse when someone who is supposed to be on your side ends up making a bad case for it. I would love for Harry and Hermione to be together, even if I understand why they wouldn't work as a couple in canon, but it is not helping my case when someone has to assassinate Ron's character to get them together. Or create a Sparkly Sue that causes highly illogical adoptions or pregnancies to get the same result. Or invent a Love Goddess that was trying to hook them up since they were GLAURUNGING 11 year olds. You get the idea.
* Sighs * Sorry about the ranting. -
You're fine! by
on 2015-08-22 03:47:00 UTC
Link to this
I'm always ready to listen to a rant; it's cathartic for me when I rant, but I don't have many people to rant to.
I know what you mean, too. I get some of that IRL with political/religious stuff-- people make a bad case and bring the rest of us down with them. I'm a Christian, y'see, so I often bang my head into a wall because one of us said something silly.
I don't read much shipfic (outside of canon relationships) so I'm not familiar with how they work out. I... may have read some Dramione and some Druna a while back. Maybe. -
Thank for being so understanding by
on 2015-08-22 05:19:00 UTC
Link to this
You're right, it does feel good to get that sort of thing out of your chest. So if you evet need to rant, and especially if it is badfic related, I'm always ready to listen to it too.
I' m a Christian too, so I get what you're saying as well.
Non-canon shipfic can be a rather messy business if done wrong. Ever heard of Die For Our Ship ? If one plays their cards right with character development, then they shouldn't have to derail or even kill off one half of a pairing in order to make way for their preferred ship, but unfortunately with badfics Die For Our Ship is almost exactly how it goes.
I have read some Dramione, but I have never read Druna. I mostly read either Harmony or canon pairings. -
Thanks! by
on 2015-08-26 22:25:00 UTC
Link to this
I might take you up on it.
Awesome! It's great to have another Christian around. What denomination are you in, if you don't mind my asking?
Yeesh. I'm fond of some non-canon pairings, but Die For Our Ship is a wee bit extreme. I wonder, what's the weirdest pairing someone has pulled off, and pulled off well? That'd be interesting to know.
I'd say I ship Druna more than Dramione, but when I read fics of either my standards were low; I couldn't say if any were well done. I'll have to look over the archives and see if there are any good 'uns among them.
-Alleb -
No problem. by
on 2015-08-27 18:09:00 UTC
Link to this
Feel free to take me up on that anytime, though I feel like that would be probably best done in the IRC, unless you want to rant to the whole Board, which I am fairly certain no one would have a problem with. Everyone here is so nice and understanding. It really feels like a community around here. Anyway, I have never frequented the IRC myself, but I feel like I probably should sometime anyway.
If I am honest, I would have to say I don't have a chosen denomination. I did grow up in a really nice presbyterian
school, so I probably feel closer to that.
Another of my favorite HP goodfics is Thou Shalt Not Suffer, precisely because it is the best HP involving christiasn that I have seen around. Unlike most of the others that I seen so far, it never devolves into a religious rant about the Wizarding World. Sure, the protagonist's parents still come off as extremely fundametalistic, but that and a few SPaG issues(none severe enough to be really distracting) are probably the worst things I can say about it.
Michelle is simply a really great protagonist. She is duely flawed and extremely likeable. She never gets preachy, but instead mostly just gets really torn apart between staying true to her faith and accepting that she was born a witch, something that very faith deems as inherently evil and sinful, and that she needs to learn to control her gifts. There is also the fact that this story contains one of the most balanced and realistic portrayals of Slytherin that I have seen around.
Die Fo Our Ship is always more than a little bit extreme. Good non-canon shipfics obviously mostly don't fall for it, but it is always a risk with badfic. I would rather the writer gave me a reasonable explanation for why the canon pairing is no longer together and why one or both of them is now attracted to the other half of the preffered ship. -
SOMEONE SAY DRUNA AND DRAMIONE? by
on 2015-08-27 03:15:00 UTC
Link to this
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/c1/4c/ac/c14cac9064e742cf09eb295c0912f9f2.jpg
^^^Literally the only time I ship them. Both pairs. Have a bonus!
^^^Again, the only way in forever that it could work. But it does. Splendiferously. -
I DID by
on 2015-08-27 14:46:00 UTC
Link to this
Y'know, I haven't watched all the way through the HP Musical. It curses to much for me. :/ I did like what I watched though.
DRUNA
DRAMIONE
YUS -
Why yes, I do remember you. by
on 2015-08-20 21:55:00 UTC
Link to this
Welcome back. :P
How's it been? -
Glad you remember me too! by
on 2015-08-21 15:53:00 UTC
Link to this
I am great, thank you. I just recently got into law school.
That's part of the reason why had to vanish, because of my entrance exams. Those were HARD. Things are better now and got some time to come down here again.
How are you? -
Hi! by
on 2015-08-20 17:33:00 UTC
Link to this
Err... Welcome back! I don't really know who you are but welcome!
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Thank you! NIce to meet you! by
on 2015-08-20 18:14:00 UTC
Link to this
You wouldn't, since I am sure you weren't around back then, but I hope we can get to know each other.
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Hey! Hi! I remember you! by
on 2015-08-20 14:40:00 UTC
Link to this
*high-fives* Here's a cupcake from Sugar Cube Corner and a Hufflepuff scarf because Hufflepuffs are awesome :)
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I am glad you remember me! by
on 2015-08-20 17:01:00 UTC
Link to this
*High-five!* Thank you for the delicious cupcake and for the Hufflepuff scarf! Hufflepuffs are indeed awesome :)
If I could go to Hogwarts I am sure I would be sorted into that house myself. Go Puffs! -
Hello again! by
on 2015-08-20 12:29:00 UTC
Link to this
I think I do recognise your name, so welcome back.
Have this Karaoke Knight - it's capable of singing out-of-tune versions of almost any song you care to name.
- Irish -
Hello! by
on 2015-08-20 16:56:00 UTC
Link to this
Thank you. And thank you for the Karaoke Knight, though I am also sort of tone-deaf and I would be inclined to join the singing and then we would have a veritable cacophany. Can't have that now, can we?
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Hello! by
on 2015-08-20 03:44:00 UTC
Link to this
Well, I just got here a little while ago so I don't remember you, but hello James!
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Hello there! by
on 2015-08-20 16:51:00 UTC
Link to this
Nice to meet you Dorano. And since you are a newbie, I guess I could say "Welcome aBoard!", even thought I am also technically new here again.
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Welcome back! by
on 2015-08-20 00:36:00 UTC
Link to this
Did I give you one of my feathers? If I did already, have another anyway! Also a Lyra plushie, now 100% free of suspicious holes. XD
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Hello there by
on 2015-08-20 03:30:00 UTC
Link to this
I don't know. I mean, I remember seeing you around back then, but I don't remember if you were around for my introductory thread. Anyway, thank you very much for the presents!
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Welcome back to the PPC! by
on 2015-08-20 00:20:00 UTC
Link to this
Here's your starter Pokémon:
Iiiiiiiiit's Blissey!
And your starting item is:
Fire Shield from Risk Of Rain!
Now, Fire Shield is broken when you stick it on a Pink Blob - there's even people who select it over Eviolite for Chansey, and that almost NEVER happens. See, the way it works is that it deals back 33% of the damage the holder takes if they're hit by a super-effective move. Given how much HP a Pink Blob has? That damage really starts to add up. It makes them extraordinarily hard to take down, especially if your opponent's using more fragile wallbreakers. Enjoy! And by that I of course mean "drink deep from the well of your enemies' tears". =] -
Thank you by
on 2015-08-20 03:25:00 UTC
Link to this
Nice to meet you, kind sir or madam. That is one very awesome and useful gift. I shall you use it well.
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Hello... No, in that case - Welcome back! by
on 2015-08-19 23:09:00 UTC
Link to this
Nice to meet you, hope to see more of you in the future! :D
Here, have a Head that's Always Screaming!
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Nice to meet you too. by
on 2015-08-20 03:22:00 UTC
Link to this
Though it is a bit hard to hear you since this Head that's Always Screaming is, well, Always Freaking Screaming!
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Oh, hello there! by
on 2015-08-19 22:59:00 UTC
Link to this
I don't recall you, but w/e — have this cup of confused Lapsang Souchong tea. It's not quite sure whether it smells like a campfire or not, and no, it's not going to eat you.
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Hi there! by
on 2015-08-20 03:18:00 UTC
Link to this
Yeah, I guess it figures that you wouldn't remember me , I mean, I wasn't here that long before I disappered. But just to refresh your memory, I was that guy who in his introduction post butchered the name of your mission and thus created the first Culture Offensive Unit mini.
But anyway, thanks for the tea, I guess. I take it you are done with handing out Stygian Tea then? Though I wonder... this new tea, it's not going to eat me, but this being PPC and all... It's going to taste horrible, isn't? -
After some Googling... by
on 2015-08-20 18:16:00 UTC
Link to this
I remember you.
Also, well, people were complaining about missing limbs, I was running out of Stygian Tea to hand out, and I was becoming rather bored saying the same thing over and over again.
As to this cup's taste, well, Lapsang Souchong is a smoked tea, so it's very much an acquired taste. I like it, but I know people who don't.
*shrugs* -
Glad you remember me now by
on 2015-08-20 20:08:00 UTC
Link to this
Yeah, I can see why you stopped handing it out. Predatory tea is kinda hard (and dangerous) to drink. Though I don't experience with it myself see your welcome gift to was a Fried plushie.
Still, smoked tea. That at least sounds... interested. That article says people either extremely love it or hate it, so lets not be subtle about it this...
* Drinks tea * You know, I am rather confused. One slip, it tastes horrible, second slip it takes goods, and then cycling throught both tastes continuously after that. I guess we can chalk it up for it being a Confused Lapsang Souchung tea, I guess? * Also shrugs * -
Welcome (back) to Creation, here's your shovel. by
on 2015-08-19 22:56:00 UTC
Link to this
Have a shovel enchanted to dig up baby moles! You have to care for them.
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Uh... Thank you? by
on 2015-08-20 03:07:00 UTC
Link to this
I am pleased to meet you, since I don't remember seeing your username back when I was here. So, does that shovel force me to keep digging themeven when I don't want to? Cause I don't taking care of cute baby moles, but if I have to spend the rest of eternity digging them... * cue Ironic Overpower * Great. I will get back to you guys when I have figured out a way to stop digging!
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No. by
on 2015-08-21 00:11:00 UTC
Link to this
It means that baby moles are the only things you dig up with it.
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Okay then by
on 2015-08-21 15:48:00 UTC
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Sorry, sometimes it seems I just try too hard with my PPC humor.
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Returnbie! *glomp* *poke* by
on 2015-08-19 22:33:00 UTC
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I do recognize your name, as a matter of fact! Have a plate of SPaGhetti!
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Wasn't poking for newbies thought? by
on 2015-08-20 03:00:00 UTC
Link to this
Hello Iximaz, glad to see you again. Oh, good punny name there! See, this is why I missed you guys so much. Delicious!
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Welcome back! by
on 2015-08-19 22:25:00 UTC
Link to this
I don't have any idea of who you are, and neither you would know who I am. But that won't be stopping me of giving ya this welcome back gift!
Is a replica of the One Ring, that works as an Unison Device. -
It is a pleasure to meet you by
on 2015-08-20 02:50:00 UTC
Link to this
I hope we can get to know each other now that I am here. My very own Unison Device! Thank you!
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New interlude! (Kinda?) by
on 2015-08-20 17:49:00 UTC
Link to this
In which the Reader discovers that she was completely mistaken about an old friend. Spoilers for Little Miss Mary; set during "Completely Mistaken".
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I'm a bit dissapointed where we're heading. by
on 2015-08-20 18:32:00 UTC
Link to this
I'm going to voice a concern that I have, namely that we are slowly veering into SRS BSNS territory. I only really noticed this after what happened Little Miss Mary - and if you have read it, (I think mostly everyone has by now,) then you know exactly what I mean. It was an incredibly well thought out mission, and filled in some plotholes, but my GOD it got dark. I really, really don't want the PPC to be any darker than it already is, (if you think about it, it is already quite dark.) I can't be the only one thinking this, can I?
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An answer by
on 2015-08-23 23:06:00 UTC
Link to this
I haven't read Little Miss Mary, but I want to read it now. Thanks for piquing my interest.
But that is a good point. If the PPC loses sight of it's original intent, the entire point is lost. I'll have to keep this in mind when I write my stuff in the future.
Of course, a bit of dark humor and satire, maybe even downplaying the seriousness of otherwise serious situations is called for.
This is giving me ideas just sitting here writing this. I have to get them down.
~ Dark Brother 16
~ Semper erit insanus -
Woah. I didn't mean to spark an argument. by
on 2015-08-21 15:44:00 UTC
Link to this
I probably coulda worded my post better. More what I wanted to get across was that if too many people jump on Ixi and Dawn's wagon, which is a perfectly good wagon, as far as I'm concerned, we have the potential to get really dark really fast. So this was mostly an attack of Orange can't word important things properly syndrome. It's an extension of Orange can't spell correctly syndrome. So sorry for causing a fuss, just wanted to get my opinion out there.
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I see your point. by
on 2015-08-21 18:38:00 UTC
Link to this
So what you're saying is: "Hey, this is cool and all--but let's not wallow in melodrama", right?
Which is... well, it's good advice. The PPC has potential to go sliding down a very boring and uncreative grimdark slope if we don't watch out. People do go nuts, and do die, and that's always been a part of the setting.
Here's how I see it: People in real life also go nuts and die, and we manage to live with it. Whether we die at age 75 after retiring from work at an auto factory, or whether we die at age 18, subjective age 143, after getting the wrong mission, we all die, and we all lose people we love. And yet we're not all walking around being sad all the time. We get on with our lives. We laugh, love, have children, tell stories, create art and learn new things.
My advice: A world with dark elements doesn't have to be a dark world. Just like we can find joy in a world where we know we'll lose our loved ones someday, our agents can laugh their socks off at the Mary Sue's detached emerald eyeballs perching on Jack Sparrow's shoulders even if they know the next mission could end their careers.
Let those dark elements stay, but handle them the way people in general handle the dark and scary parts of our real lives--each person, in his own way, finds a way to live a good life despite it all. -
Sometimes... by
on 2015-08-21 15:54:00 UTC
Link to this
A single pebble rolling down a hill can cause a landslide. Your post happened to be that pebble, this time. Don't sweat it too much, since the heatedness seems to have subsided and the community is no worse for wear. Might even be a bit better in the long run.
Also, I didn't realize you preferred Orange. Here I was calling you Yoshi all day. My mistake.
-Phobos -
Either is fine! (nm) by
on 2015-08-21 20:18:00 UTC
Link to this
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Wait, I thought they preferred 'ngeYo'! (nm) by
on 2015-08-21 15:56:00 UTC
Link to this
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..feel free to ignore that bit of weirdness unless it amuses by
on 2015-08-24 11:34:00 UTC
Link to this
-you. Ah, subject line character limits. But yeah. It's...
Hm. Hmmmm. I've thought up some more.
Irish could be ishsa (yes, I know, it's pronounceable. Some people have all the luck). Dark brother 18, I believe (read: really hope) it is, could be awesomely termed rkbr (okay, possibly cooler in my head, but look, it's all ks and rs and awesomeness!) --
...you know what, I was going to continue, but I'm starting to think it may really, seriously be time to get more sleep.
~DF -
^_^ by
on 2015-08-24 11:52:00 UTC
Link to this
Darn, if only Plort was only starting now...
I think Outhra would have to be Uthr - yes, another vowel, but it's a nice Norsification of Uther Pendragon.
... I wonder how many of these are real words?
Running through them in order, then:
-OrangeYoshi is Ngeyo, which is one half of the Kimanya-Ngeyo Foundation.
-I'm going to be Neso, which is either Asturian 'in that', or a moon of Neptune.
-Neshomeh is Esho, 'his fire' in Hebrew. Who the 'he' is is left unstated.
-JulyFlame can be Yfla, the Young Fraud Lawyers Association.
-Scapegrace is Pegrac, a holder for exercise equipment.
-Outhra is... oh, this is too good. Outhra is Uthr, which is Welsh for either 'terrible' or 'wonderful'.
-Phobos is a Manx oboe.
-You're Nfir, which while sounding Norse, is, uh... I don't even know what it's doing on that page. Is it a character name? I don't understand. :-/
-Iximaz is Xima and is my language twin! She's, um, (cripes, how do you write the subjunctive?) 'that I/she moan(s) about', I think.
-Irish is Ishsa, the Idaho State Horse Show Association.
-Dark Brother is Rkbr, and is a fan club for Ramin Karimloo.
Favourite things to come out of that:
-Two Asturian words! What are the odds of that?
-Outhra is Welsh.
-Hebrew Neshomeh has clearly swapped names with DawnFire.
hS -
Come on, hS, do your research properly... by
on 2015-08-27 22:32:00 UTC
Link to this
You can't just look at the top result in a Google search and assume that it's the right answer.
I am nothing whatsoever to do with the Idaho State Horse Show Association. If you'd looked a little bit harder, I'm sure it would have been obvious that I took my name from the International Society of Hot Sauce Aficionados :)
(Which is, of course, the fourth result on a Google search).
- Ishsa -
Apparently, NFIR... by
on 2015-08-25 01:45:00 UTC
Link to this
...is the input required to display that hanzi using the "Cāngjié input method"
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...okay, so now my brain is going 'what if we all did that' by
on 2015-08-24 11:25:00 UTC
Link to this
(In my defense, it's pretty early.)
But really. You could be... ines, or something (eso? ineso? Oddly, this looks even weirder than I was expecting). Nesh could be esho, July might well be... yflam, which has a nice Old English feel to it until you add the m (and realize that it makes no sense), Scape could be egra? No, too easy to pronounce. Pegrac? A bit odd, I'd say the first works better (insomuch as any of this works). Outhra, if any of you remember him, could be... thr, I suppose...suggests Norse to me a little. Phobos could be obo, which is at least a word in English :P I, of course, would be nfir, nfi, or wnfi if I'm feeling vaguely Welsh, and Iximaz might become xima or ima, the last of which becomes 'mother' in Hebrew if you pronounce the i as 'ee' :D /starts running/
Also, I find it amusing that so many of these start with a vowel.
(If you're curious, the only other one of these with a Hebrew meaning seems to be esho, which means 'his fire' if you put the emphasis on the second syllable and if I'm even thinking correctly or in modern Hebrew--it sounds kind of clunky to me for some reason. Aren't languages fun? :D)
/much yawning/ Behold, a bit of sleepy morning musings from DawnFire (or from my Magic Oblong, as Scape so wonderfully terms these things). Hopefully there are no typos this time...
~DF, who may very well go back to sleep nowzzzz - So... by on 2015-08-24 12:07:00 UTC Link to this
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I like it, actually. by
on 2015-08-21 15:20:00 UTC
Link to this
Little Miss Mary was a *legendary*--I don't think it should be handled in a trivial manner! Besides which, it's a truly horrible story that trivializes pedophilia; I wouldn't want to treat it like an afternoon's entertainment.
I like it when missions get serious without being melodramatic, when agents fight real threats, when they get away by the skin of their teeth. I like a good fight scene or a well-planned ambush.
The PPC isn't as small a world as when it got started; it's not really just about laughing at badfic anymore. We're writing in a well-developed world now, and just like real people's lives get serious sometimes, our characters' lives will get serious sometimes.
We've moved from Bilbo chanting rhymes at Mirkwood spiders, to Sam facing down Shelob with a frying pan. That's the way things happen when a world gets bigger.
If you want to write humorous stories, write them. Let others write their more serious stories. PPC writers should be free to write whatever they want, as long as it's good writing, as long as it doesn't infringe on someone else's story or change the way the PPC and HQ work.
We've banned Emergencies partly for precisely that reason: Because we don't want one writer to declare that something they write about must happen to everyone, and pull others into their serious story. So someone else writing a story in which an agent deals with a real threat, by no means keeps you from writing a story in which the worst threat is from snorting Bleepka out your nose while laughing at the badfic.
If you want the PPC to be more light-hearted, you write light-hearted stories. There's no need to dictate what other people do with their own agents, within the bounds of non-melodramatic good writing. With such a huge variety of writers doing their thing, we're going to have a huge variety of tones. Unlike a multi-author published series, we don't have to worry about keeping the tone the same for each installment. Because we don't have to be homogeneous about our writing, we can have a serious, hard-fought battle with a Warrior!Sue in one story, and still have the next one be a light-hearted story about a couple of agents trying to cope with cat disguise in a Warriors fic.
I know that the people who lived through the Emergencies and their accompanying problems might be wary of serious stories, but please, trust me, this isn't the same thing! No one is keeping you from writing what you want, and if they did, all of the Board would call them out on it. Our agents experience the PPC in their own ways. Just like a light-hearted mission can't prevent others from writing serious ones, a serious mission can't prevent others from writing light-hearted ones. -
I sorta kinda agree. by
on 2015-08-21 17:22:00 UTC
Link to this
I'm very much torn on this, which is why I haven't responded to this thread before now. Whenever I went to write something, I would see another aspect of the debate that I hadn't considered. What finally sold me was this:
We've moved from Bilbo chanting rhymes at Mirkwood spiders, to Sam facing down Shelob with a frying pan. That's the way things happen when a world gets bigger.
The PPC is a world unto itself. It's no longer just a tool for poking fun at bad fanfiction.
I like serious PPC stories when they're done right. I like seeing these characters deal with heavy issues. Goodness knows I've got a few drafts concerned with those kind of things (although after this, I believe they will be delayed even more than they already were).
That being said, I still have some qualms. Mostly, I'm worried that people are confusing "serious" with "spectacle." Everything's been big and dramatic. Yes, I know that LMM is a Legendary badfic and should be treated as such, but I feel like this phenomenon is not confined to merely that story. I can recall reading only one recent story that I would consider to be quiet and serious (Nesh and Ixi's collab, to be specific). I would very much like to see those kind of stories as opposed to their big and loud compatriots.
Also, the old guard aren't wrong when they say stretches of doing nothing but LMM and its various tie-ins could color how outsiders see the PPC. I will admit to asking myself at least once since it came out whether I really fit with this new tone. Yes, I know it hasn't actually changed, but for one brief moment it felt like it had. I'm not sure how that can be actually addressed, but it is something to keep in mind.
I've also seen a lot more proposed agents that seem only built for one thing: fighting Sues and Stus. I've always held (as many people can attest to) that agents should not be engaging in open combat with Sues. The rules that we've established say that, 99 percent of the time, any agent who does should be horribly killed or maimed. I've got no problem with sneaky ambushes and clever tactics, but I'm not seeing a great deal of those being used in stories.
So those are my thoughts. Sorry if this seems fragmented; I'm writing this right before work. -
More ambush, less battle? by
on 2015-08-21 18:28:00 UTC
Link to this
I like your point about people building agents to actually fight Sues and Stus. I too rather enjoy the sneaky, assassin-style killings, the ones where agents who are smart, tough, or just plain creative win out over the powerful but bland Suvians.
Voluntarily going toe-to-toe with a Sue or Stu is... inadvisable at best, both in terms of narrative and in terms of common sense. Some Sues/Stus are so two-dimensional that they won't even resist when you shoot them through the heart, but not every one of them is like that. Some are warriors who are actually seen using their warrior skillz. If you're smart, you don't want to deal with that.
Here's the trouble: You have to charge the Sue/Stu while they're alive, and charging them takes time. So you can't just use a sniper rifle or a heat-seeking missile or whatever and kill them outright.
I think we need more creativity when it comes to disabling them before charging them, and I think we need to focus on having our well-developed agents fight in creative ways against the blandly overpowered Suvians--we need to demonstrate that a well-written character has the flexibility and wiles to win against a Suvian *in an unfair fight*--which is unfair in the agent's favor because the agent has set up the fight to be unfair, to begin with, and the Suvian simply doesn't anticipate that anyone who isn't at their power level could possibly be a threat.
Not that plans don't go wrong sometimes. Sometimes, agents have to fight a Sue straight up. But most agents--even ESAS dealing with godmoders--should not be actually planning on simply overpowering their targets. That's boring, and it goes against the point of an assassination, which is to show that well-written characters in the hands of a good writer can beat raw power and reality-bending without becoming Sued themselves. -
Just want to say that I support this view. by
on 2015-08-21 16:28:00 UTC
Link to this
Mostly because I've been puzzling over how to say this myself the past twentyish hours, and couldn't think how to put it.
-
Well done on beating me to posting on this matter. by
on 2015-08-20 20:25:00 UTC
Link to this
Because like Neshomeh said, yes, we've seen this happen before, and it is actually very, very hard to steer things off that path when it's happened.
What Neshomeh didn't mention with her response is that around the same time as all these events and emergencies and what not (That eventually led to the creation of Catastrophe Theory- as you can see we successfully entered what should have been the DOOOOOM stage without DOOM actually occurring, well done us, unless we weren't paying attention when it actually happened, which is a distinct possibility) the PPC page on TvTropes was created.
And filled very much with things that were not what we at the time considered to be in the mainline for the PPC, nor do to this day, for that matter.
So the end result was we got a lot of newbies who arrived with the Completely Wrong Idea about the PPC and that we were serious and were in it to dismantle writers and mock them (which is a concern voiced below by Silentthunder in another thread, as can be seen) and that the PPC as a concept was 100% serious, rather than being what it is. Some of said people managed to work their way through it and are in fact still around, but a lot of them were rather displeased at the fact that we weren't here to smack fanauthors into submission to acknowledge How Canon Should Be Done- several, in fact, didn't like fanfiction at all! I'd rather not round two of that, personally.
That said, I'm also more than a bit put out over the fact that it's entirely consumed the board since that mission was published- while I'm impressed that said fic was taken care of and a mission done out of it in a relatively short time period, considering what's happened with most of the other Legendaries- at the same time I'm kinda put out. I can't read this mission for a good week, if at all, because it's definitely not something I can read while at work, or access through the only current internet source I have without a significant chance of getting into trouble.
There's nothing like feeling like you're missing quite a bit when you can't even see what it is that's going on and a chunk of what's following in the flurry is related so is also filled with spoilers. -
Thank you so much, July. This is what I feel completely. by
on 2015-08-21 12:50:00 UTC
Link to this
This was part of my concerns, I guess, but I could never find the right way to say them.
-
*tidies up Silentthunder the mini-Boarder* (nm) by
on 2015-08-20 22:16:00 UTC
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That's one mission by
on 2015-08-20 19:45:00 UTC
Link to this
First of all, it was a mission to a Legendary Badfic - making it easy would be anticlimactic at best, and bordering on Suish for the agents in question. Just look at the Celebrian mission.
Secondly, and the main point... that's one mission. There's no rule saying that all missions have to be that level of serious. Even a lot of Rina's previous missions have been much more light-hearted. You're making a generalization about the direction of the entire organization based on one story.
If you really want there to be more funny, light-hearted missions, then you should write them. -
Actually... by
on 2015-08-20 20:06:00 UTC
Link to this
Phobos points out that, although it's just Iximaz & Co doing the serious plot stuff, their stuff comprises, like, ninety percent of what's being posted on the Board these days. It's not their fault, but by the same token, who could fault someone for looking at the Board for the past two weeks or so and thinking that sort of stuff is what we're all about? There's not much else going on to contrast with it at the moment.
~Neshomeh -
90%? That much? by
on 2015-08-20 20:22:00 UTC
Link to this
Wow. My apologies for writing so much. But I can't promise I'll slow it down anytime soon. :P
-
Yes. That much. by
on 2015-08-20 20:50:00 UTC
Link to this
Having done a quick count, you have personally posted nine stories in the last two weeks. Your collected co-writers have added at least a few interludes to go with LMM meaning that stories centered on your characters have come out about once a day for the last two weeks.
That is quite a lot. On another note, many of those could have been grouped into larger posts.
-Phobos -
I'm not entirely sure what you mean. by
on 2015-08-20 21:19:00 UTC
Link to this
On another note, many of those could have been grouped into larger posts.
Do you mean we should have posted all the stories in one go? Because if so, we had a few reasons for doing so:
1) We didn't want to post a thing with a giant huge mega long list of things people had to read.
2) Generally, don't new stories get individual posts?
5) ...Actually, I think that's it. -
What I mean by
on 2015-08-20 21:37:00 UTC
Link to this
1) You still ended up with a huge list, just spread across two weeks.
2) Generally, missions come out months apart, so "generally" doesn't really hold up. There is precedent for multiple missions and interludes being posted in a single post.
5) 3, sir.
-Phobos -
This is a valid concern. by
on 2015-08-20 19:24:00 UTC
Link to this
I note that none of you who have replied so far were around back in, eh, was it 2006-2008 when hS was writing The Reorganization and Crashing Down, and Tawaki was doing the Assimilation Crisis and the Key to Canon thing and Mirror Multiverse thing and the Macrovirus Epidemic and the Mary Sue Invasion, and Laburnum was busy trying to push the limits of squick in missions?
Yeah, other people tried to do the same stuff. It didn't go well. It started getting out of hand. That's when we started writing the FAQ for Newbies, Guide to the PPC, etc., to stop people doing that stuff and joining because they thought we were ALL ABOUT that stuff.
So, as long as it's just Iximaz we're probably cool, but I'll second OrangeYoshi's wish not to see the whole PPC try to emulate her, even if she is the hS of today what with being madly prolific and wildly popular and an all-around nice person. Because it wasn't fun the last time it happened. If we can make sure it doesn't start this time, so much the better.
~Neshomeh -
You forget the Land Before Time missions and the Alumia one. by
on 2015-08-20 20:08:00 UTC
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Though admittedly the first were all handled with humor at the forefront.
-July, penning a larger response to this thread -
Scratch it, Alumia is the wrong one. by
on 2015-08-20 20:10:00 UTC
Link to this
There was another wotsitname Sue nearer fall 2008? That was handled with a lot of 'OMG THIS IS THE WORST SUE SHE WILL RUIN CANON!!1!'
-
Robecca? by
on 2015-08-20 20:14:00 UTC
Link to this
The Narnia one? That was... what's his name, Articuno-thingy?
~Neshomeh -
Yes, that's the wossit! by
on 2015-08-20 20:27:00 UTC
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Artic-something.
I feel rather like I should apologize to hS for getting that one mixed up with his, given the difference (though the level of nicking of concepts was quite high). -
Well, it's not just me... by
on 2015-08-20 19:38:00 UTC
Link to this
As you've already seen, DawnFire and SeaTurtle have been a part of the arc for a while, as well as one other Boarder who shall remain unnamed because spoilers. However, it is a small number of agents overall in the grand scheme of things, and it's not like we're setting out to incite riots or anything.
You can blame Sergio Turbo for that.
But yeah, we're basically keeping it just within our little circle of agents, and anything anyone else does is entirely them. We're doing this as an exploration of what would happen to agents in their circumstances, and it's not going to stay dark forever. It'll all balance out in the end. :)
(Also, the hS of today? Um, I kind of squealed a little bit, ehe... ^^; That means a lot, you know.)
-iX -
Yeah, I might've made things look worse than they are. by
on 2015-08-20 20:05:00 UTC
Link to this
I let myself become emotional, and my writing suffered. Trust me, I never wanted to incite an actual PPC Civil War, but I set Agent!Sergio's anger a couple notches too high... ok, a couple dozen notches too high, and it sounded like I was trying to propose just that.
I can't promise I'll always write all fluff and fun, but I set myself a bar. Next Blank SPrite chapter will be a gut punch, I admit it, but things will start going for the better afterwards. -
True. by
on 2015-08-20 19:44:00 UTC
Link to this
We've taken to calling you the Cult of Iximaz in this apartment, FYI. You're all secretive and shadowy and plotting and stuff. {; P
But, as long as everybody is only involved if they want to be and you're not trying to drag everybody else in whether they want to be or not, 's fine by me. And I do rather enjoy the connections that certain agents are finding they have with certain other agents, by the way. My sense of narrative finds it rather delicious.
~Neshomeh
P.S. Speaking of which, we really gotta do the Ilraen-meets-Farilan thing sometime, cuz yes please! -
The Cult of Iximaz? Fantastic :D by
on 2015-08-20 20:00:00 UTC
Link to this
I can promise you that everybody I've seen get involved has done it of their own free will. We've been very happy with the results, too--and we're trying to keep things pretty believable, which...also makes for fun. And I'm all for the connections between agents: they're very, very fun both to write and to see happening.
Honestly, though...watching this grow and develop over the past months has been incredible. There have been cute things and sad things and satisfying things, and overall I'm just really happy with how much we've put into this and how well it seems to be coming out. It's been a great experience.
But yes. Essentially, this is at least intended to be self-contained. It's not an emergency--it's one dead agent, another injured one, and their closest friends and family being affected. We also intend to balance it where we can.
And now that this has ended up being more of a response to several posts at once, I think I'll end it and go back to looking forward to the fire-lizard hatching :)
~DF -
As to the hatching... by
on 2015-08-20 20:57:00 UTC
Link to this
Unfortunately, that might not happen today after all. I got put on duty this evening, so I gotta go get food pretty soon, and between one thing and another I don't think I'm gonna get the intro done before I have to leave. Sorry, everyone. {= (
I'll try to get it going tomorrow evening.
~Neshomeh -
Re: As to the hatching... by
on 2015-08-21 16:16:00 UTC
Link to this
Uh... I don't want to be intrusive, or something like that, but I left an In-Character bid about two days ago. Sorry, I don't want to bother, I just want to know if my character is gonna make it.
-
Yeah, you're in. {= ) by
on 2015-08-22 02:32:00 UTC
Link to this
Sorry I haven't replied. I was gonna mention your agent being included with the RP-start announcement here, which then didn't happen. It continues to be a scramble to get things done with the little time I have. >.
~Neshomeh -
Well, you know we are waiting. by
on 2015-08-22 02:44:00 UTC
Link to this
Eagerly, yes, but also patiently. We want this to be as awesome as possible too, you know. :P
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Seconded with much enthusiasm. (nm) by
on 2015-08-22 02:48:00 UTC
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No worries. by
on 2015-08-20 21:09:00 UTC
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Hey, that just gives everyone something to look forward to tomorrow, right? :P
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Seconded. by
on 2015-08-20 21:20:00 UTC
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Although I actually won't be around tomorrow evening (going away for the weekend), so I don't mind if it starts even later :)
~DF -
Muahahaha. by
on 2015-08-20 19:52:00 UTC
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Is it bad that I just laughed? A genuine evil laugh?
*hides athame and steps away from the bound virgin* -
Nah, no wories... everyone makes mistakes. by
on 2015-08-20 19:55:00 UTC
Link to this
Keep going :)
-
O.o by
on 2015-08-20 19:48:00 UTC
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I mean, what? :D
Anyway, nobody's getting dragged into this without their full consent and cooperation, at least as far as I know. *shifty eyes*
And yes, we'll have to do that sometime! Maybe after the fire-lizard hatching? *nudge nudge wink wink* -
Is there anywhere I can get a cliff's notes of it all? by
on 2015-08-23 10:13:00 UTC
Link to this
I've been gone for a while because new computer and you seem to release about five stories a day so I'm hopelessly, woefully behind and barely have any idea what anyone's talking about, heh.
- Here. by on 2015-08-23 13:56:00 UTC Link to this
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Scape's Notes! by
on 2015-08-23 12:46:00 UTC
Link to this
SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS
Rina Dives, agent of this parish, am ded. Well, that happened in Rose Potter, but she's been backsliding towards an, er... untenable mental state ever since. She got sent into another Legendary and watched her best friend get incinerated by a not!Harry (he got better), so she snapped and absconded with a TARDIS. =] -
You realize she's going to squee for days now. :P (nm) by
on 2015-08-20 19:46:00 UTC
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I concur; this is a VERY valid concern. by
on 2015-08-20 19:38:00 UTC
Link to this
I haven't been here nearly as long as you have, but I can understand why you'd want to avoid a similar situation. My point of view is this: do whatever best suits a story or character arc. Whether that is light, dark, or some overwhelming shade of grey, do what will make the story the best it can possibly be.
However... don't do something just for the sake of doing something. If you force a joke, it won't turn out well, will it? Darkness for the sake of darkness or gimmick for the sake of being different is a very bad idea, IMO. Everything you write should have a purpose to it, a reason. If you decide to start or follow a trend... step back, take a look, and ask what the overall purpose of the action will be. Everything has a reason - so make it a good one. -
Yes. This. (nm) by
on 2015-08-20 19:46:00 UTC
Link to this
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Personally... by
on 2015-08-20 19:19:00 UTC
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I don't mind darkness. There are people who may found the PPC being too... childish? There are people who may found it too serious.
It's like Harry Potter - it started as a childrens' book and gradually went darker, as its readers were maturing. I like to think of the PPC in the same way.
As Ixi said, life is not all sunshine and turnips (I think that's what she said ;D) - things are bound to get bad, or have an unexpected turn. The PPC is a pretty good representation of that. Under that mask of Time Lords, Pokemon and fiction, those are some pretty serious human problems which may make you think some things through.
Also, trust me - LMM and Ixi's spin-offs are not the darkest things you'll ever read. Just wait until I get hold of the wheel. -
And this right here is why it's valid. by
on 2015-08-20 19:26:00 UTC
Link to this
Also, trust me - LMM and Ixi's spin-offs are not the darkest things you'll ever read. Just wait until I get hold of the wheel.
See? This here's what worries me. {= /
~Neshomeh -
Apologies, Nesh... by
on 2015-08-20 19:28:00 UTC
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Until there is a Joke Mode installed somewhere on the Internet, I think I should indicate my... specific... sense of humour somehow.
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My take on the issue. by
on 2015-08-20 19:03:00 UTC
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I personally don't have any problem with things getting dark every now and then, if there is good reason for it to happen. The darkness makes the light that much brighter and it propels characters toward growth.
Even back to the beginning, there has been darkness in PPC stories. Some of the greatest moments in the best spin-offs have come from seriousness and darkness.
What you should have a problem with is darkness for the sake of darkness. I find a lot of grimdark stories fall into this trap. We have to have gore/death/trauma because those things are edgy or cool. If it doesn't serve the story or the characters, then there is no point.
So, ask yourself, does the recent seriousness and darkness serve the stories and characters that they inhabit? I think you'll find that they do. Do you need to like them because of that? Not even remotely.
-Phobos -
Look, dude... by
on 2015-08-20 18:57:00 UTC
Link to this
Yeah, the PPC is mostly a humorous setting, but it's not always. There's a reason why we have frequent references to agents snapping in action, agents dying in action, agents running away from HQ and being declared MIA...
Face it, for all the humor it has, it's not exactly fun to be an agent. They're harried, they're tired, they're overworked and underpaid. And the longer a spin-off goes on, the longer an agent has to buckle under the stress. And considering Rina held a record of 36 recorded missions (which, I think, is the second-highest number overall; someone correct me if I'm wrong), she's had a lot of time to reach snapping point, especially considering what she's already gone through.
The PPC isn't always sunshine and rainbows. Look at the various Sunderings. Look at the Reorganization. Look at the Emergencies that have left hundreds, if not thousands, dead and injured. Look at the other Legendaries, at C*l*br**n; I mean, Dafydd died on that mission, and would have stayed dead if it hadn't been for Constance. Look at Subjugation, where most of the agents never came back.
I can't help but feel a little offended, though, that you're dismissing months of work out of hand like this. This has been in the making since February, and we've put a lot of effort into it. Many hours spent writing, rewriting, planning, discussing, betaing, polishing. Every PPCer gets to decide the overall flavor of their spinoff, and this is what we've gone for. We want to explore the consequences of being an agent, and how it really isn't the greatest job anyone could ever ask for.
But if it makes you feel any better, LMM is about as dark as my spinoff's going to get. Everything will be lighter from here on out. -
Ehm... by
on 2015-08-20 18:54:00 UTC
Link to this
Well, I won't say 'we're heading'. I'd say 'Ix's spinoff (and parts of the spinoffs of other connected people such as DawnFire) are heading'. That's their choice as writers. Other people write different things.
Also, I'd like to point that while LMM — and its repercussions — is rather serious and dark, it is not WH40K levels of grimdark and it's certainly not grimderp.
It's been done before, too; look at Tawaki's adventures, or read Caddy's writings — there are some serious moments there, too.
What's more, if you look beyond the funsies and at things usually played for laughs here, you'll notice that the PPC is an organisation of overworked misfits with barely functioning tech fighting a battle against Eldritch Abominations; the bosses are negligent aliens; and so on. For the most part, it's played for laughs but it can be played for drama as well.
Last but not least, it feels to me that reading LMM and saying 'oh no we're going SRS BSNS grimderp stahp' is kinda rude to Ix, DF and the rest of the people and the huge amount they put into this arc. -
Would like to elaborate briefly. by
on 2015-08-20 19:10:00 UTC
Link to this
Tawaki at one point wrote something that ended with a number of agents--including T'Zar's husband--actually dead, and a number of others assimilated by the Borg. Caddy--I don't remember the exact details, beyond some things with Cadmar and with Maria Nightingale (mental state in both cases, I think?), but I loved the way it was done, and I still want more of that spin-off. For that matter, we can also add to the list a number of insane or dead agents, a number of serious moments between Nume and Suicide (also handled wonderfully), and, well, basically...this really is nothing new. We may be doing a rather complex arc, we may be involving several groups of our agents...but things can't possibly remain bad forever (that's not the way of the world and would get very boring to write), and, at the end of the day, we're still writing other things--and we three or four writers are also not the entire PPC.
~DF -
Yeah, you can. Next question. (nm) by
on 2015-08-20 18:44:00 UTC
Link to this
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Yoshi has a legitimate concern. by
on 2015-08-20 18:52:00 UTC
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There is no call to be rude about it.
-Phobos -
I really, really think we can, though. by
on 2015-08-20 19:05:00 UTC
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OY99 might have more of a point if there were lots of stories coming out that were as dark as LMM. But, see, there aren't. Dawn and Des were being ridiculously cute in their most recent spinoff. Skarm's guys haven't changed their tune as far as I can tell. I think they're making a fuss about nothing.
YMMV. -
Dammit, dammit, dammit. by
on 2015-08-20 19:10:00 UTC
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Replied to the wrong post. What I meant was that I think we can totally ignore OY99's complaints of unnecessary darkness, not that we should be rude. Which I was, and for that I apologise.
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We can't exactly ignore it... by
on 2015-08-20 20:31:00 UTC
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Considering (as Nesh has said, and me, too, for that matter) we have seen this happen in the future and it's far more preferable to nip it in the bud before we have to deal with people trying to make the PPC dark and serious because they think it's better or cooler.
It's definitely a potential issue. -
That's not quite what we're doing, though. by
on 2015-08-20 20:59:00 UTC
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I agree that it's a concern, and I understand why. However, our intentions in writing this arc are *definitely* not to make the whole of the PPC dark and serious--because we don't think that's better or cooler, we honestly think that that just gets boring and depressing to write and read if it goes on too long. (I think I speak for all of us; we certainly switch between writing fluff and feels often enough, and we try to keep stories balanced for the most part. They can feel free to clarify or contradict, though.)
While we do intend to explore the consequences of what's happened, and to do so realistically for our characters and their situations, angst is not and will not be the only thing going on, and it won't last forever. Everyone, including us, would probably get very bored if it did.
So yes: our corner of the PPC, if it can be called that, is currently going more serious, and will remain that way for a bit while this arc plays out. However, we have no plans to keep it that way forever. And, most importantly, we do *not* want the entire PPC to go serious and dark, especially not for for an indefinite period of time. The PPC is supposed to be fun, to have substance of varying types, to be, in essence, generally comedic even if it's not always light. We'd really like to keep it that way.
Again, I definitely understand the concern. But I can vouch for myself and my co-writers that we are in no way trying to change the PPC for the darker--we think it's plenty cool as it is, and have done for years. We just want to explore something relatively self-contained that could happen within it.
~DF -
Er, yes it is. by
on 2015-08-20 21:16:00 UTC
Link to this
---Whoops, that was an impressive misuse of word in my previous one, should be 'past' rather than future. I think, nothing like watch to drain the brain outta you.
Anyways, I'm going to be frank: Your reply here does not impress me whatsoever. Let's break it down.
My initial response to Scrape was largely along the lines focused on 'before we have to deal with people trying to make the PPC dark and serious because they think it's better or cooler.'
Your response... while you're insisting you're saying that no, you don't want the PPC to be dark and serious, you're also being rather dismissive of the actual issue because that's kind of what you guys are actually doing right now, with all of this.
"So yes: our corner of the PPC, if it can be called that, is currently going more serious, and will remain that way for a bit while this arc plays out."
"I can vouch for myself and my co-writers that we are in no way trying to change the PPC for the darker..."
For better or worse, you lot are rather dominating the current publishing scene for the PPC, as Phobos noted; the board is swamped just from stuff from you guys and with so much of it recently connected to LMM I can't even read much of it. Just because it's your 'corner' doesn't remove it from the rest of the PPC. By fact of making your rather large and fast moving corner of the PPC more serious, yes, you are making the whole of the PPC go the same direction as well.
That said, I don't hold this particularly against you, any of you, in the singular, but it is something that has to be kept in mind against the whole. I was there for the whole shish-kebab of problems that came about the first time. I'd rather there not be a second. -
Hm. by
on 2015-08-21 00:11:00 UTC
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Okay. I've been writing and rewriting replies to this since you posted it, while slowly calming down, watching everyone else calm down, and just...I don't want to drop replying altogether, because I don't want you to think I'm ignoring what you wrote, but I also think that a summary of the points I wanted to make is the more logical idea at this point.
I wanted to tell you that you make good points--we *are* posting a lot. Some of it is unrelated to LMM (the interludes Des and I did, for instance), but a good chunk of it is. Potential newbies arriving and thinking that the PPC is all about dark themes and only dark themes--well, without knowing what's planned for this arc, without knowing exactly what's been written and when things are set to be released...I'd have gotten concerned as well. It seems likely that the time-span and remaining volume of what we have left of this arc (not to mention us and other people posting lighter things) will prevent that.
Something I wanted to clarify was that I didn't mean to dismiss the issue--just to respond to what looked like an implication that we were writing this arc because we want to change the tone of what everyone else in the PPC was currently writing (and, presumably, to change the tone of all of our own works permanently). That thought horrifies me, and I wanted to refute it, hence why I wrote what I did (which, apparently, was not clear and managed to miss a point).
I do not now, and never will, want every writer in the PPC to go 'yes, let's make everything dark and grim and humorless for ever and always because lighter things are boring and uncool'. I wanted (and still want) to make it perfectly clear that I do *not*, in any way (potential accidental influence aside, which would be, well, accidental), think that the PPC would be improved or made somehow *'cooler'* by all the agents becoming humorless, super-dark James Bonds of some sort. (Although now I want to write that as a badfic for the badfic games, and add a scene of horrified and amused agents responding to it. That could be fun). As I've said, the thought that someone might think that *is* what I wanted...that really, really horrifies me, to the point where this is less a summary than a slightly shorter rewrite of the attempted summary of the fourth rewrite of...ach.
Basically: I missed the point, you may have misunderstood me at some point, and by this point I just want to let you know that I have in no way been ignoring what you said and call it quits (and stop using the word 'point'). I think the main issues that were being discussed have been worked out, everyone is calmer, and this message doesn't need to get any longer.
~DF -
Okay. by
on 2015-08-21 00:29:00 UTC
Link to this
I really appreciate the fact that you took the time to calm down and muster your points, as logically as you could.
First item: That was definitely a cause; it's hard to tell what's going on if you aren't in the loop, after all, and most of us weren't! Which isn't a bad thing, because after all, if everyone's involved straight up it's different from seeing their reaction as a reader in the audience.
Second item: The implication wasn't aimed at you or the others. It's more that at this point, I (and the people who've been around way longer than I have) have by now seen an awful lot of people swing through the community and declare they want to write super-serious PPC missions and make everything like that! Or even say it *after* they've been given permission. That's a good part of the reason the Permission process is more stringent these days. It was alarming then, and it's still alarming now! We didn't mean to suggest it all at your feet, not at all, but it's still something that is a worry to everyone who was around when it seriously looked like the PPC was going to blow up into being constant emergencies and serious events.
Third: Again, I appreciate that. (And as for the Bonds comment, well, I highly suggest staying tuned into the Board, I'm going to be posting something you might want to be around for shortly.) Like I said, I've seen it, and so have others. It is exactly as horrifying as you'd think.
In short: It's cool, we're cucumbers, this is a salad bowl. -
Funny you should mention salad. by
on 2015-08-21 01:24:00 UTC
Link to this
I recently went out and picked a bowl of lettuce.
And Bonds, huh? I'll stay tuned. I like Bond. And things similar to Bond.
~DF -
Yes. Up there. Top of the board. Right now. (nm) by
on 2015-08-21 01:25:00 UTC
Link to this
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Excuse me. by
on 2015-08-20 21:36:00 UTC
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While I understand your (and Nesh's and Phobos') concern, I am confused. What do you suggest that they do?
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Okay, look. by
on 2015-08-20 21:34:00 UTC
Link to this
We're not doing this arc for teh coolz. We're not doing it because we think it's the direction the PPC needs to go, because that's not at all the case.
We don't want the PPC as a whole to get darker, not by any means.
My spinoff isn't going to stay like this, but because I just haven't yet released certain unpublished materials, everyone seems to be freaking out and acting like LMM is the end-all, be-all of my spinoff.
This is not the case. Things will get lighter, but not immediately. That would be unrealistic and would quite frankly make what's already happened look like, well, like it happened just for the cool factor.
Seriously, I don't want to see the PPC get turned into a grimdark place because keeping that as the status quo is depressing and boring and nobody likes a downer ending, myself included (contrary to what it might seem).
And I'm sorry, but what do you want me to do about that? Stop writing for a while? It's not my fault I'm releasing the most stories; if other people want to release, it's not like I'm stopping them. I just happen to have a lot of free time on my hands, and I use almost all of it for writing. -
For starters... by
on 2015-08-20 21:48:00 UTC
Link to this
You're welcome to calm down, to begin with. I apologize that this particular thread is upsetting you and that you feel like you're getting targeted, because it's definitely not the intention on my part or anyone else's.
As for your assertion that your stories stories will be returning to a lighter tone: Okay. I don't have a problem with that. Nor I suspect does anyone else who've expressed concerns in this thread as well.
The concern was the possibility of this indicating a turn overall towards darker material for the whole of the PPC. You and your cohort are currently publishing a great deal, and they're following a lot of your lead. It's not out of order to be concerned about that sort of thing when rather suddenly a rather large group of people who are publishing regularly and quickly are writing darker PPC stories- especially for those of us who saw it happen before and what happened after.
We are not psychic. We cannot tell what is going on in your mind for the most part from sheer text alone, or even if it is actually sarcasm, like in the example of Matt Cipher and Nesh. We can't tell what you were planning or intending to do without being in your head, unfortunately.
And as for the speed of your writing: All I did was comment on it. Nowhere did I even insinuate that you should curb your writing speed or stop whatsoever.
If you want to talk one on one, I'm going to be on AIM for awhile at fairladypsyche and on Gmail with the address that'll be clickable with my name. -
Alright then. by
on 2015-08-20 22:18:00 UTC
Link to this
So, since you're seeing this as a problem, what exactly do you suggest?
I don't want to see a repeat of what happened last time, because although I wasn't around then, I have heard the stories and it's not something I'm eager to experience for myself.
The way that things stand, on my end, is that there will be a few more stories released, and come September 19, there's going to be one last story (not as much of a Wham Episode as LMM, but still fairly impactful), and things will calm down from there. -
Right now? Nothing. by
on 2015-08-20 22:43:00 UTC
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You've already explained yourself.
You've already assured me (and others) that you'll be changing the tone of your stories again in the future once this character arc resolves itself.
Thanks for being so reasonable about this, and again, I'm sorry if anything I've said has made you feel displaced or anything. I really do like the fact that you're willing to be as productive as you are when it comes to writing missions and expanding your little corner. -
Here's the thing. by
on 2015-08-20 22:13:00 UTC
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I have never seen Iximaz be anything but good for this community, and I can vouch for how much love she has for being a part of it. She is absolutely dedicated to seeing the PPC be the best it can be and adding quality work to be enjoyed by others in the process. I can understand your concern, and it is very realistic - but she has yet to disappoint, and I know she would never want to set the PPC on a course that would be detrimental. She has a lot yet to come, so just wait and see; I promise you will not be disappointed. Have some faith in her, she's never let us down before!
-
As I've said, I have nothing against Iximaz. by
on 2015-08-20 22:27:00 UTC
Link to this
My concern was only that, a concern. I'm much less concerned now that she's personally stated that things will actually be going up from this point on.
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Well, not 100% up? by
on 2015-08-20 22:33:00 UTC
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The last story in September is still of a darker tone, but after that it'll start going up.
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And yet... by
on 2015-08-20 22:11:00 UTC
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You accuse Iximaz of "swamping the Board" with "darker material". That rather implies - to me at least - that you take umbrage with the amount of missions she's writing as well as their content and tone. Which, okay, fair enough. But to suggest that, off the back of one mission and a few interludes concerning its effects on the agent in question's close friends, Ix and her "cohorts" are ushering in some kind of new age of grimderp is absurd. Yes, you were around way back when we were diddly ickle fanlets, and your experience of PPC history is to be respected, but you're right - you are not psychic. In any way.
And that includes telling the future. -
Ah, I wasn't aware you were part of this dialogue. by
on 2015-08-20 22:40:00 UTC
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Is there any particular reason why you've decided to be so rude to me? Or OrangeYoshi99, for that matter?
Nothing I've said has been out of bounds by the constitution, and as I've made clear, I don't want Iximaz to come away from this with bad feelings, so I certainly haven't been throwing around accusations. -
I can only apologise, then. by
on 2015-08-20 23:19:00 UTC
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I won't lie - I did say what I did to you out of anger, and I meant you to be insulted by it. I apologise for doing so and will attempt to amend my actions in future.
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I appreciate the apology. Thank you. by
on 2015-08-20 23:24:00 UTC
Link to this
And here's a suggestion: Whenever I'm particularly hot-headed about something, instead of replying immediately, if I can't cool down, I ask a friend- usually someone who's cooler heeled than I am by default- to read what I'm going to respond with first.
That way I can still reply, but I also get some advice on if I'm coming off too strong or anything and then I can change it rather than running right into causing a fight with someone.
It works pretty well for the most part for helping with tone but still being able to say your opinion. -
One moment, if you will. by
on 2015-08-20 23:31:00 UTC
Link to this
July, frankly: implying that a fellow PPCer, whatever their faults, shouldn't be a part of a public discussion on the Board is rude as well. Scape has apologized to you, which is good; I believe you owe her an apology as well.
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Re: One moment, if you will. by
on 2015-08-20 23:38:00 UTC
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At no point was I rude to Scrape, nor was I making the insinuations or accusations she said I was.
My response was due to the fact that she entered the conversation to make said response. The dialogue was public, yes, but not for attacks, which hers was, between that and the initial shutdown she tried to aim at OrangeYoshi99 in the first place.
I called her out on it, per the Constitution because her response was rude and constructed in such a way that it was trying to get a similar response out of me, like she admitted. The PPC does not condone of that sort of behavior, and I had no intention of responding in a similar manner. Bringing attention to rude behavior is not rude. I just wanted to point that behavior out to her. I did not except or want to force an apology out of her, and as I said, I'm thankful she gave one.
I am not going to apologize for that. -
Could you refrain from calling me Scrape, though? by
on 2015-08-20 23:47:00 UTC
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That's twice now, by my count. I'm not entirely sure what you mean by it.
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Ack, crap. by
on 2015-08-20 23:49:00 UTC
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Sorry, I'm using mobile, and it keeps autocorrecting and I don't always notice.
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Fair enough. Internet Oblongs are stubborn things. (nm) by
on 2015-08-20 23:51:00 UTC
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I was wondering what an Internet Oblong was. by
on 2015-08-20 23:52:00 UTC
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Makes sense now that it's a phone.
-Phobos -
Yup. Except mine's up and vanished, so that's fun. =] (nm) by
on 2015-08-20 23:53:00 UTC
Link to this
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Re: One moment, if you will. by
on 2015-08-20 23:44:00 UTC
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Ah, I wasn't aware you were part of this dialogue.
This, to me, implies you didn't want Scape participating in the conversation. Yet you didn't say to Darkotas that he wasn't part of the conversation, either.
Calling Scape out was the right thing to do. Her opinion was rudely worded, yes, but it was still her opinion. That's not the issue in question. Implying she wasn't allowed to join in the discussion is what comes off as rude on your end. -
Darkotas wasn't being rude in his response. by
on 2015-08-20 23:47:00 UTC
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Scrape's reply was unwanted because it was rude. Most people don't want people to be rude in a conversation, and would rather they not participate if they are going to be rude.
I also do not appreciate the fact that I am being ganged up on on this matter, between you and Desdendelle. I've been a target of this sort of behavior before. I did not appreciate it then, nor do I appreciate it now. -
I do ask you to excuse me. by
on 2015-08-20 23:52:00 UTC
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I've asked Ix to reply in my stead because I don't think I can write a level-headed reply right now — I need to cool off a bit. It certainly wasn't my intent to gang up on you or offend you, and if I did offend you, I do apologise as it wasn't my intention.
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It's cool. by
on 2015-08-20 23:54:00 UTC
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I appreciate the fact that you're able to recognize the need to step away to calm down before making further replies, and apologize if I had anything to do with making you hit that point in the first place.
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Well. by
on 2015-08-21 12:21:00 UTC
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Now that I've got some hours of sleep: Well, the thing is that there were two distinct issues in this line of conversation last night.
#1: Scape was rude. You were right to call her out on it. She apologised, and I think that's it for that; holding her rudeness against her after she apologised has a score of, em, unfortunate implications, let's say.
#2: The title of your post was poorly phrased. It looks to me like there's an "and you shouldn't be, so go away" ending implied. Basically, people have a right to voice their opinion, and being rude doesn't mean they have to shut up; being rude means being called out and, optimally, apologising. The thing is, it looks to me like you've mixed the two, and that's why I think you owe Scape an apology.
Also... frankly, what pissed me off last night is that people were saying "look, there's an issue" and not following up with "and I think a, b, c would be good things to avoid the similar Bad Stuff that happened in the past" or "I don't know how to resolve this, do you have any ideas?". That might be my biases (or issues withpeoplea person I've met, =/) speaking, but it really pissed me off. What's more, it feels uncomfortably similar to "your story has issues a, b, c" (as opposed to "Look, you've got problems a, b, c in the story; try doing d, e, f to make it better" or "there are problems a, b, c with your story; I'm not quite sure how to solve them, but please pay attention") to me.
I really hope I didn't end up rambling here, because I've the sinking feeling this makes a lot more sense to me than it'll to anybody else. -
'an issue' etc. by
on 2015-08-21 12:59:00 UTC
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I think you - and Iximaz - and Dawnfire - and Scapegrace - and whoever else - are misunderstanding here.
Neshomeh, July, and whoever else aren't saying 'this story/storyline is unsuited to the PPC', which seems to be the feel you're (all) getting. The analogy Nesh made to the earlier situation is instructive; it went in, mm, four or five stages.
1/ I wrote Reorg, Crashing Down, and Clbr__n. They were very popular.
2/ People (eg, Tawaki and Laburnum) decided that they were popular because they were darker/grittier/more interconnected/had deaths in. They started writing that sort of thing into their own stories - Tawaki did repeated arc plots, Laburnum... did Laburnum stuff.
3/ (Partly because of TVTropes) New people arriving thought that the Tawaki-Laburnum type of mission was how the PPC was all the time. They started trying to best it, with horribly-violent or convoluted prospective agents.
4/ The people who'd been here beforehand spent a couple of years going 'Erk?! That's not what we're about!'. It took a very long time to sort it out.
5ish/ 'Sorting it out' involved trying to increase the profile of more positive writing. I wrote Sandra and Freckles' first mission as an antidote to it; I also (perhaps ironically) killed off the DIO to get rid of the 'there are secret agents who kill others' darkness wandering around.
What various people are trying to say is that this storyline has put us into Stage 1: it's wildly-popular, consuming the Board, and making an impression. And that's fine; popular things are good! Neshomeh certainly wasn't saying 'Crashing Down should never have been written'!
Stage 1 is fine; it's just another way of saying 'sometimes stories are popular'. But... well, look at Matt Cipher's 'joke'. That's a classic Stage 2 response - 'you did it, so now I will too!'. And there's this three-way 'who can write the most missions' thing going on with Iximaz, Voyd, and SkarmorySilver; do you think it impossible that one of them would go 'hey, I could pull a LMM on my agents, too...'?
And then we'd have new people seeing just that sort of mission - the big, everybody-dies-this-changes-everything stories that we saw too many of last time. And we'd be sitting solidly in Stage 3.
What July and Nesh are trying to do (and, I guess, me, at this point) is shortcut to Stage 4: raise awareness of the fact that if people try and imitate this, things will go badly sideways. Hopefully, if that message goes across, we can skip Stages 2 and 3 entirely.
So, what should you do? What should everyone do? Not change. Iximaz has a moderately dark storyline going on right now, but apart from the agents involved in that, no-one else needs to. Keep letting Agent Des be cheerful, even though miserable things are happening elsewhere in HQ. If you're not involved in the LMM fallout, don't try to imitate it - don't give your own agents Dark Arcs because you think that's the way to go. Just... keep on being normal.
Short version: nobody's saying there's something wrong with the story. The concern is that other writers will try to imitate it and make it the new norm. Counter that by not doing so yourself.
hS -
Well... by
on 2015-08-21 13:24:00 UTC
Link to this
[Spoilers], but believe me, Des will keep soldiering on (for the most part. He's allowed to hate his job); he's the kind of person to spring back up again (and get help when he needs it — cf. his stay in FicPsych after ATWNaNS, calling for help in "So Much for Subtlety") — though, I think, not right away. The whole business is going to shake him. Even Librarian [spoilers]. But, yeah, I'm not gonna go LMM on my agents.
Related to that: while the PPC is, at the end of the day, comedic, I know that I want to explore what being an agent does to people. Is it all grimderp? No (and look at the fluff I've been writing recently. Mm, fluffeh). Is it all sunshine and rainbows? Also no, because, frankly, being an agent is a shitty job (albeit with some nice perks).
And, anyway, it might be me, but the 'shortcut to stage 4' bit simply didn't register with me right up until this post and by that time I was already pissed off. Related to that: can I ask you guys to be more forthcoming with that sort of thing? This is the sort of thing people are emotionally invested in and it's a good idea to be extra-clear in that case; I know that I'd have reacted differently if there wasn't such a wait between you guys' posts and that post of July's.
There is also the bit about Scape, but that seems mostly done and the bits that aren't seem to be under control.
(I hope I didn't miss anything in this post.) -
... this was my first post. by
on 2015-08-21 13:34:00 UTC
Link to this
And Neshomeh's first post - which I think is the first one actually supporting OrangeYoshi's - said this:
So, as long as it's just Iximaz we're probably cool, but I'll second OrangeYoshi's wish not to see the whole PPC try to emulate her... If we can make sure it doesn't start this time, so much the better..
So how much more forthcoming would you have liked her to be?
hS -
Spell it out, basically. by
on 2015-08-21 13:40:00 UTC
Link to this
As I've said — until July said what she said, I didn't quite register it. It's a classic case of 'something that's obvious to you isn't necessarily obvious to other people'.
Also, by 'you guys' I meant 'generally the older oldbies'. You see what I mean about non-obviousness? -
Lemme spell a thing out. by
on 2015-08-21 14:58:00 UTC
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(And yes, full disclosure, I am slightly irked at being informed that I have to do this for someone I consider generally mature, intelligent, and thoughtful.)
Here's what my process was when I first posted:
1. I'm busily working on an intro RP post so we can do a fun thing when I said we would, despite unexpectedly having to go to work after all.
2. I get a text from Phobos alerting me to look at the main Board.
3. I see a guy with a reasonable and reasonably worded concern getting brushed off by the LMM Cohort en masse, making it seem like his opinion isn't allowed.
4. I react with the content of my post, which hS already elucidated. I would like to further elucidate that I was attempting to help Phobos disrupt the "ganging up" effect as much as anything else, because as July points out, that is quite as scary as, in fact moreso than any potential descent of tone into srs bsns. I didn't spell that out because I rather thought y'all would stop and think about the effect you are having or could have on the Board, and it wouldn't be necessary. I certainly didn't want to so much as imply that you guys were deliberately shutting down someone who disagreed with you, because I don't think that's the case at all. I like you guys. You're nice people. I know you're not doing that.
However, I do think y'all need to be more aware of the effect you're having in both areas: 1) Popular things tend to get emulated. Be aware; please help make sure we don't have to go through 2008-2010 again. 2) People who all hang out together and plan together and generally do stuff together apart from the rest of the group all popping up to disagree together is scary. Be aware; try not to all jump on a thread within minutes of each other to support/dismantle X opinion.
I hope that is fair as well as sufficiently clear. Again, I do not intend to accuse anyone of anything, merely to raise awareness of a potential issue and provoke a little more thought going forward.
~Neshomeh, going dark now because work. -
Thank you. by
on 2015-08-21 15:19:00 UTC
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I do appreciate that. And, well, even mature, intelligent and thoughtful people have their moments of immaturity, stupidity and thoughtlessness; I should know, I've been blundering around in this thread like an especially clumsy elephant.
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I don't have enough time for a longer reply at all but by
on 2015-08-21 13:58:00 UTC
Link to this
Des.
You remember PPC2, right?
You're doing their thing with making it an us vs them thing, between making it newer vs older, using the excuse of appropriate manners to back up people who were being jerks and the super fast tag teaming on people who aren't agreed with.
I'm not saying you guys are being malicious but the behavior is disturbingly similar to me. -
A lot of people remember that a lot of different ways. by
on 2015-08-21 19:18:00 UTC
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Please don't dredge it back up.
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I don't think I remember, no. by
on 2015-08-21 14:06:00 UTC
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I remember there was something going on around the time you left, but I certainly don't remember anything concrete.
I'm not trying to make this an 'us vs them' anything, I really don't want anything of that sort; I just think people, even people who make mistakes and have issues, do deserve certain things (and see my above post, not gonna repeat myself). As to the tag teaming, well, it's not my intention, and again I apologise. On hindsight, I should have just said that I'm going to cool off.
I really don't want to offend anybody, or disturb anybody, or anything of that sort. But the points I raise are important to me and I don't want to drop them before they're settled (just to clarify, I'm not saying that you or anybody else is telling me to do so). -
... I'm actually quite upset by that. by
on 2015-08-21 13:50:00 UTC
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'The older oldbies' are not, actually, a uniform mass. I deliberately stayed out of this entire conversation, so I really don't appreciate being lumped in with the 'un-forthcoming' posts you think you see.
hS -
I do apologise. by
on 2015-08-21 13:59:00 UTC
Link to this
I didn't mean to offend. But I value your input and I was kinda disappointed you didn't say anything, to be honest.
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Blah, that got long. Tidier version: by
on 2015-08-21 13:12:00 UTC
Link to this
What Nesh & July are trying to say is that the previous incident set a pattern:
1/ I wrote Reorg, Crashing Down, and Clbr_n. They were very popular.
2/ People started to imitate them, working in their own dark/interconnected/death-filled plots.
3/ New people arriving thought that dark-interconnected-death-filled was how the PPC was all the time. We saw a lot of very violent/convoluted agent proposals.
4/ The people who'd been here beforehand spent a couple of years going 'Erk?! That's not what we're about!'. It took a very long time to sort it out.
The LMM fallout is classic Stage 1: it's wildly-popular, consuming the Board, and making an impression. And that's fine; popular things are good! Neshomeh certainly wasn't saying 'Crashing Down should never have been written'!
What July and Nesh (and now me, I guess) are trying to do is shortcut to Stage 4: raise awareness of the fact that if people try and imitate this, things will go badly sideways. Hopefully, if that message goes across, we can skip Stages 2 and 3 entirely.
So, what should people do? Not change. Don't imitate or try to best LMM and its aftermath. Just go on as normal. Simple as that. ^^
hS -
You ninja, hS. by
on 2015-08-21 13:25:00 UTC
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As you can see, I already replied to the messier version.
*shrugs* -
That makes sense to me as well. by
on 2015-08-21 12:37:00 UTC
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Also, good on you for cooling off before posting.
I don't think the issue is too serious, but if it is... well, we can just tell writers about it, can't we? Like, "Hey, I understand why you might want to take your agents down this path, but you're getting a little grimdark here. Maybe make it a bit lighter?"
-Alleb -
Hm... by
on 2015-08-21 00:31:00 UTC
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Yeah, looks like I'll sleep on this and continue tomorrow.
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Seconded, for the most part. by
on 2015-08-20 18:55:00 UTC
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I think OY99 is wrong (see my above post) but there's really really no need to dismiss what he says out of hand.
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New interlude! by
on 2015-08-20 19:33:00 UTC
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RC 211 Interlude 2: ISHFWILF
Characters featured: Valon, Kala, Mazlorea (new)
Events: Just read to the end, it's not that long.
This does contain spoilers for Little Miss Mary, by the way.
And yes, I've been planning this event for quite some time. You probably knew that from the Ten Years Hence story DawnFire and I wrote.
As for the title, I've started using a musical theme for my story titles. It's a U2 song that got covered by Disturbed; it's actually the initials of the song.
If you don't get it, it's "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For." -
D'awww! by
on 2015-08-22 20:02:00 UTC
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Yay! If this were a creature, I would want to huggit.
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Dude... by
on 2015-08-20 19:42:00 UTC
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Dude... dude... that ending... dude...
APPROVED! :D -
Okay, this is adorable. by
on 2015-08-20 19:39:00 UTC
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I mean, yes, I knew what the idea was, but seeing it in writing...it works quite nicely. It has some lovely moments that just made me smile--the note, the ending, that sort of thing--and I like how the focus was mainly placed on how the moments progressed. Basically: I like what you did with this idea :D It makes for a very short, very sweet story.
~DF