Feb 2015 Archive, part a

*bells* I haven't heard from you in so long! What's new and exciting in your life?

Huzzah!

Here, have a fully functional replica of the Eye of Agamotto!

Have a ghostly kitten! I... may have given one of those already. Hm.

Hey hey, congratulations! Take this plate of freshly-made SPaGhetti, and since I wasn't around to give you a welcome present, take this chirping pocket elephant! Feel free to remove the urple bow on its tail if you so desire.

*offers hugs*

Since I live on the other side of the pond I even had to Google the Super Bowl to see of which sport it's an event.

... Are you telling me rugby and american football AREN'T the same thing?

Oh man, that has to hurt for Seattle. Serves them right, the jerks. Man, that was an ending for the ages!

Easily, my second favorite Superbowl. Ponies, the Hawks being embarrassed, and the most beautiful interception of all time. This is one for the history books.

(If you are curious, #1 is when New Orleans won. WHO DAT!)

That was literally the highlight of the evening for me and my brother. The best part was that they were wearing Indianapolis Colts gear. Guess who lives in Indiana?!

Yeah, yeah, I know it was because colts/ponies yadda yadda. I don't care. :D

I'm not a big sports fan; I only watch for the commercials and I must say they've been pretty disappointing so far. That Sprint one with the shrieking goats was funny, at least.

Uh, I want to live in Seattle when I'm older, so go Seahawks?

Have a large bag of NM&Ms, guys!

Congratulations to Iximaz, Desdendelle and PoorCynic.

And congratulations to Kaitlyn, too. Being the first voter, I wondered whether you would appreciate to be made a PG with one sure "Yes" and nobody bothering to object, so I tried to move the bar a bit up. I'm still not sure how this emeritus thing will work in practice, but I'm glad that I've been outvoted.

HG

I saw the call for election, but did not vote since I haven't been a regular poster for years and I am against blind voting. :) I am sure all the newly elected permission givers will do a great job. :)

And welcome to Duty. Use the Hat and its formidable powers For Great Justice!

I intend to release it a free-to-use, but I wonder if the rules remain the same.

I don't know how my mini-Boarder got the Hat instead of me, but if that is your decision, I shall stand by it and pffffft >D

Sorry, couldn't keep a straight face. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go faint.

Also, is this the part where the new PGs give speeches? *clears throat* Friends, Boarders, fellow Protectors, lend me your sporks-

Oh, it's not? Never mind then.

*hands out plates of SPaGhetti to Desdendelle and PoorCynic* And congratulations to both of you! :D

It's been suggested several times during the PG election that we ought to have some kind of 'PG Emeritus' status - something that says someone is still a Permission Giver, but isn't currently entitled to give Permission. This is the sub-thread to discuss exactly how that should work. I'm hoping for a consensus, not a vote, so let's aim for that.

The questions, as I see them, are basically two: how does PG Emeritus status get activated, and how does it get removed?

Options I can think of for flipping to Emeritus:

-Don't post or visit the IRC at all for a given period of time.
-Don't meet a minimum level of activity for a given period.
-Be inactive, and have been made a PG a certain amount of time ago.
-Be inactive, and have been made a PG before a certain date.

My thought is that we should probably be looking at 'zero activity' as the benchmark; Techno-Dann, VixenMage and Araeph would all probably fail to meet any kind of 'minimum activity' line, but I can't imagine anyone wants to deactivate them. So how long do you have to be 'gone' for? Personally I'd suggest a year, solely because it's a nice round number.

The other option is to make it so that 'old PGs' are deactivated, even if they pop in occasionally. In that case, I'd probably set the benchmark at the introduction of Permission 3.0 - the 'writing samples from the table' model. If you haven't been active since then, you probably won't know how to do it, and you giving Permission will just confuse things.

(Either way, note that Kaitlyn will drop straight to Emeritus status; she's fine with that, and at least two of her 'no' votes have said they'd accept that option)

(Other note: I think it would be extraordinarily rude to 'deactivate' any of the first five PGs: Jay, Acacia, Miss Cam, GreyLadyBast, or Thalia Weaver. I don't think there's going to be any argument for the Originals, but feel free to debate the other three if you want)

Options I can think of for returning to Active:

-Post at all.
-Make a certain number of posts.
-Be active (either posting at all, or at a certain activity level) for a given period.
-Specifically request activation.

My preference would probably be 'active for a given period'. I'd define active as something like 5-10 posts a month - which, according to my records, is what PoorCynic is averaging, and we just voted him in - and say you have to meet it for three months. That's midway between the line for requesting Permission, and the arbitrary benchmark I imposed this time for becoming a Permission Giver.

So: discussion open. I don't think this needs to be a PGs-only decision, though I would like all our active PGs to chime in if they're interested.

hS

Barons, Knights, and Civilians of the Union of Plort, I beg your indulgence for a few small matters of consequence before we commence our celebration of the founding of Castle Harpwire.

First, due to her continued absence from these shores, the barony of Makari is being deactivated, and divided between Barony Dann and Barony VixenMage. As ever, should Baron Makari return, she will be entitled to reclaim her barony from those who now watch over it. [Because I don't want to straight-up erase her, but equally, my maps will get messy if I just keep inactive PGs on there indefinitely.]

Secondly, the Refuge of Ozerbord would like to confirm the wording of our constitution: that the office of Protector in Ozerbord rests on the person of Baron Huinesoron, not on his position as the sole baron in Ozerbord. While military administration is divided along baronial lines, the civilian government of Ozerbord is solely the province of Baron Huinesoron. [Basically because I'm the only person with admin powers over the Other Board, which in accordance with the 'reflection of reality' nature of Plort, means I must be the head of government. ^^]

Thirdly, Baron Huinesoron has paid out of his own pocket to fund the construction of roads between every current baronial seat and its nearest population centre; by this measure it is hoped that the travel of our barons to the Baronial Council this summer will be significantly eased. Regretfully, however, the isolated and forested position of Tegnoh has meant that it is unable to be connected. [That's Baronies Araeph, Huinesoron, and Cassie, plus any rural castles that crop up in the next post; basically this is to make my maps make more sense.]

Fourthly, it gives me great pleasure to announce the creation of four new baronies. The Baronial Council has discussed the candidates extensively, and surveyed the feelings of the populace, and we are pleased to confer the rights, privileges, and duties of a Baron of Plort upon:

Lady Iximaz, the Far-Travelled
Lady Kaitlyn, the Knight Who Goes ^^
Sir PC, the Poor Cynick
Thanasius Ampelius, the Warrior Monk

In accordance with the Edict of Bast, the domains of these barons will be decided based on their lands of residence. I therefore call upon them to declare before this company which of the nations of Konti-Nyuum they will take under their protection, that their borders may be set and confirmed.

[Okay, basically, please name one or more of the four nations, based on your interests in the PPC. If you spend a lot of time in the chat, that's Iric; if you're on the Wiki a lot, that's Wechi; if you get into a lot of RPs, that's Ozerbord, and if you're on the Board, that's, uh, Borrd. You can choose multiple, up to three - but you can't hold land in both Iric and Ozerbord, since they don't border each other. One or two countries is best. Any special requests, such as coast towns, cities, or even specific areas of land, will be considered; basically I aim to leave everyone their castle, and keep borders to geographical features; beyond that, I'm willing to shift everything around]

[The map of Konti-Nyuum can be found here, if you need it.]

~~~~~~~~~

"I got you something."

Kaitlyn (Lady of Ozerbord, Knight Who Goes ^_^, secret Duchess-in-Exile of El-Jheycom) looked up from her desk to see her husband holding a sheet of paper. "From the capital?" she asked. "New reports from the Marizu League?"

"Not exactly." Baron Huinesoron put on his best 'serious' face. "'Lady Kaitlyn-'"

"Don't I merit a 'sir'?" Kaitlyn asked. "I thought after all these years... never mind. So is this about the hospital?"

"Shh." Baron Huinesoron cleared his throat. "'Lady Kaitlyn: in recognition of your long service in the lands of Konti-Nyuum, and your honourable aquittal of the duties which you have assumed-'"

"Sweet Kanun, tell me they're not throwing a ball in my honour," Kaitlyn groaned. "Can you imagine how-?"

"'We, the Baronial Council of the Union of Plort,'" Huinesoron continued over her protests, "'do hereby confer upon you the rights, privileges, and duties of a Baron of Plort-'"

"What?!" Kaitlyn leapt to her feet. "Is this a joke? Because I'm telling you, it's not funny-"

"No joke," Huinesoron assured her. "I've got a map of your new domain, too. It runs from, let me see... from the banks of the Karaktar to the Larninkurv Mountains, and along the curve of the Lhawgin Heights."

Kaitlyn's eyes widened. "El-Jheycom," she breathed. "Huinesoron, how--?"

"The Edict of Bast lays a heavy emphasis on historical association," Huinesoron said. "The fact that you're currently living in another baron's castle means your present residence can't be considered, so..."

Kaitlyn let out a sound that could best be described as a 'squee', and threw herself into her husband's arms. "I don't know how you managed this," she said, "but thank you, thank you, thank you."

"It's not all good news," Huinesoron told her, holding her close. "The Baronial Council was split on the issue of your appointment, so we had to make a few... compromises. Specifically, since you're not actually living in your-- in Barony Kaitlyn, you've been created a 'non-administrative baron'."

Kaitlyn leant back and quirked an eyebrow at him. "Which means?"

"You don't have a vote in the Baronial Council, or the Council of Borrd," Huinesoron said. "You have full baronial powers, but nothing above that."

"... which means we won't be declaring independence any time soon," Kaitlyn concluded. "A clever move. But just give us time. El-Jheycom's sun will rise again."

"I'm sure it will," Huinesoron said. "And you, Baron Kaitlyn, will be there to see it."



Here's a health to the dear lass that I love so well
Her style and her beauty, sure none can excel
There's a smile upon her countenance as she sits upon my knee
There is no-one in this wide world as happy as me

Here's a health to the company and one to my lass
Let us drink and be merry all out of one glass
Let us drink and be merry, all grief to refrain
For we may or might never all meet here again

hS

My agents hardly know the meaning of the word. However...

Gall might choose Pandora for the opportunity for some serious high-flying action. Fellrazer would come too, of course, disguised as a Banshee. She might try to convince whoever's providing the disguises to make him a Great Leonopteryx, but since she's dragging Derik along, he'll make sure that doesn't happen. It would attract too much attention.

Jenni might take Henry to visit the Wizarding World, but they'd probably have to stay away from Hogwarts itself. There's no explaining the presence of a six-year-old there, and she wouldn't have him disguised as anything else since he's so young. Still, there's always Diagon Alley.

Ilraen would be happy to go anywhere with open grasslands. He might choose Narnia and try being one of those centaurs that people are always comparing him to. He might enjoy studying astronomy with them, too.

Nume would choose Gallifrey. Then he would gank a TARDIS and go wherever and whenever the hell he wants to. Psych! ... But he'd probably just go looking for lost texts to read. Library of Alexandria, anyone?

~Neshomeh

None of these places actually interests them.

In fact, the only one they're familiar with is Hogwarts, and... well, Nikki might like it after all, but Agent!Sergio would be disappointed at the lack of places where cars can be driven around Hogwarts, or even most of the other places ("It's four freaking years that I don't get the chance to drive my Trueno, I want a place with roads") and Corolla prefers more high-tech settings.

Doc - Narnia. Like me, Doc has a interesting soft spot for Narnia as an especially pure and moral world. (Even though we only read the series in high school, believe it or not.)

Dream choice: The nameless club at 249B East Thirty-Fifth Street from "A Winter's Tale: The Breathing Method." (A.k.a, the one novella from Different Seasons not turned into a movie yet.) It's a club where people meet to tell stories, but it's also said to have many "rooms and corridors . . . entrances and exits." Sounds like a great place to get lost!

Vania - Probably Asgard, out of these choices. Games and musicals are Vania's thing, so none of these would leap out at her, but Asgard's interesting blended science/magic would be intriguing to her.

Dream choice: Right now, probably Twilight Town, to try some sea salt ice cream. Maybe she would try some of the odd jobs that appeared as mini games in Kingdom Hearts II. And finally find out what that beach looks like! Later on in my spin-off, Vania will get introduced to Lost, which will probably become her dream vacation.

Yoof - Definitely the Hogwarts kitchens.

Dream choice: Probably that diner in Spaceballs, in hopes of meeting Barf in person (while scoring a meal).

Séverine - She would probably go to somewhere Elf-inhabited in Middle-earth and try to learn to make proper lembas.

Millie and Olsen/Mollie and Ollie - Hm. None of these places are Disney (no, Narnia and Asgard do not count). I could see them going to Hogwarts in a (doomed) attempt to learn magic to replace the kind Millie has lost without her brush.

...and the only Panem I'm familiar with is the panem you buy at the grocery store or bakery... I'll go with Narnia. Centaur disguise?

Kelly: "Olympus? I mean it's my home-continuum, and I wouldn't mind going home for a bit and seeing my dad again, and besides last time I saw it i was a bit messed up from the battle that had just taken place..."

Apollo: "Asgard, a load of super-powered beings with medieval style weaponry and lots of potential warfare. it sounds way too much like home to miss."

Agent Huinesoron: "Hmm. I suppose Narnia? Most of the others are filled with technology and/or humans, and I spend enough time back home as it is. It could be interesting to visit Cair Paravel; I wonder if anyone's ever performed an archaeological excavation there..."

Agent Kaitlyn: "Middle-earth. First Age. Doriath. Luthieeeen... wait, 'all-paid'? Think I can convince them to import some hobbits to Doriath, too?"

Agent Selene: "I think I'll take Asgard. No particular reason - I just think it sounds interesting. Um, as long as Loki's not there."

Agent Morgan: "I'm currently banned from Gallifrey for timeline-related infractions. Failing that, then, how about Olympus? I like their architecture, and yes, I know exactly who I sound like."

Agent Rosalind: "Oh! I would like, be interested in, and enjoy a trip, tour, vacation or holiday to Hogwarts, being the school of magic in the series of Harry Potter books by J.K.Rowling, said series of Harry Potter books consisting firstly of Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone, secondly of..."

Agent Haar: "Panem."

I think that's enough from them.

hS

Marvin and Printworthy... would have a hard time. Probably Narnia, but Middle Earth is a serious option. You know what, I am going to say Narnia. At least Printworthy's disguise would be minimal. He would loose the cutiemark, grow a little taller, stretch out his muzzle, and loose the glasses. He could stay a unicorn at least. And it is very pretty, with a lot of charm, and wonderful citizens, for the most part. While they love Equestra, and will always love it, no matter what is thrown at them (and this is a promise I make to them and you all), Narnia would be a welcome break for them.

Now, Jumper? All of them. He already has been, and will continue to go, Jumping-restricting bracelet be darned. And he will drag Sarah along for the ride, no mater how hard she tries to go against it.

Well, I'm pretty sure none of my agents would choose Panem. That place kind of sucks for its people!

But, among my other teams...

Team Ari, Tera, and Theia: Visit Asgard! (This is where I'd go as well)
Team Lana, Narav, and Riaa: Visit Middle Earth, preferably one of the more scenic, less war-torn parts, and go camping. They stay far away from Mirkwood and any place where spidermonsters are likely to be killed, even with the disguises.
Team Cepha, Amara, and Fio: ...They'd probably also visit Asgard, but Olympus might also work!
Doc Kindheart: Visits Gallifrey and checks out their medicine, because she has no idea how vacations work
Anne and Caroline: They visit Asgard and either copy or steal as many tech schematics as possible.

Falchion would probably insist on going to Pandora, just for the sake of the creatures and awesome scenery (that and getting to be an Ikran, probably), while Rashida would prefer Asgard because she'd be fascinated by ancient mythologies aside from Egyptian. Sarah, of course, would go to Asgard purely to see Thor.

E.V.L. would like to visit Hogwarts purely for nostalgic value (one of her homefics took her there, after all), and Rayner, of course, won't have any of it. He'd probably want to go to either Middle Earth or Narnia instead (he's a humanized MLP character, MLP is sorta fantasy, so he likes fantasy... sounds legit).

Why have any of those, though, when you could have Isla Sorna, or even the upcoming Jurassic World? Dinosaurs for everybody! :D

The Chinese woman looked at Angus from across the Cafeteria table they shared. "It's a PPC travel brochure that I managed to find under some mouldy paperwork in Personnel," she said as she handed the document to her coworker. "I think it's supposed to convince the newbies that maybe, just maybe this place isn't a total pit of despair."

Beside her, Nasir sighed and rolled his eyes. "Given the fact that you found this by digging under some abandoned crud... well, I don't think this thing lasted very long."

Penny shrugged. "Iunno, but it's still pretty to look at."

Meanwhile, Angus was examining the brochure. "Well, let's see... oh, the Hogwarts one looks nice. If the trip also included Hogsmeade I'd take Sophie to Honeydukes and buy her some candy..."

"Ooh, sounds lovely," said Penny. "There's nothing on this list that really grabs my attention-- I'm not part of any of these fandoms-- but I wouldn't mind a trip to Middle-earth. Shire, here I come!"

Nasir pointed at the brochure. "Hey Angus, may I have a look at that?"

The blond man passed the travel guide to his Arabic coworker. "Yeah, no problem man. Actually," he turned to Penny, "a trip to Gallifrey wouldn't be so bad."

"It's got to get unstuck from that pocket dimension first, though," sighed Penny. "Hah! To think that ten-ish years ago we could actually go there. It's funny how things change, eh?"

Both of her coworkers muttered sounds of agreement. Nasir looked up from the brochure and asked: "Where is Panem? It looks like some American city but... I don't know."

"Uh, I think it's a nation in the Hunger Games 'verse if I remember correctly," said Angus, scratching his chin. "Y'know, the young-adult-dystopian-future-kill-people-for-sport novel?"

Penny arched an eyebrow. "Another Battle Royale copycat? What is it with all of these authors and shoving teens into an arena to fight to the death? Did they never grow out of their gladiator phase or something?"

"That's a thing?" said Nasir.

The Chinese agent made a vague waving gesture with her hand. "Whatever. You know what I mean. So! Where do you want to go?"

Nasir looked at the brochure again. "Hm... I've always had a thing for floating islands and stuff. I'll take Pandora: those airborne landmasses are like a poor man's Sanctaphrax but oh well."

Angus checked his watch. "Fifteen minutes of break time left, guys. Shall we?"

Penny and Nasir gathered their trays of food and stood up. "Let's roll," said Penny. "I can't wait to go and read some more badfic while surrounded by a bunch of weeping, sleep-deprived adults!"

"If only I shared your enthusiasm," said Nasir as the group left the table.

Also, Middle-Earth during the Second Age. No one hears much about that, after all, and my agents both appreciate Middle-Earth's awesomeness :) :)

I really wish one of the choices was Redwall. So much delicious food...

Ahem, sorry. Valon and Kala would be off to Hogwarts. Probably just to try the candy (Valon has a GIGANTIC sweet tooth) and watch some Quidditch.

I think Xericka and Gremlin would visit either Asgard or Gallifrey. Gremlin would probably push for Asgard for the festivities and the feasting, whereas Xericka would be more interested in Gallifrey's cultural and historical aspects.

Danny would probably go with Pandora. It's probably the closest to a traditional "I just want to relax" kind of vacation, despite the poisonous atmosphere and nasty beasties. I don't see a lot of kicking back in Narnia.

Laura and James... I don't know. James might like a kind of exploration-style of vacay, so I could she him doing well in Pandora or Middle Earth. But both together? I can't really see them going to any of these places as a form of relaxation. Now if you had said it was this Pandora--

--then they'd probably be raring to go.

Are you going somewhere with this, or is it just for fun?

That being said, my agents are probably sick of Hogwarts by this point, and will be sick of Olympus and possibly Gallifrey and Narnia by the time I'm through with them. And Panem just sounds dangerous.

So I'll go with Middle-earth. I'm sorry to say that, even though I've read the books a few times, I don't know the continuum well enough to do a mission in there, so my agents won't be going there anytime soon. And since I'm rereading the series now, I'm feeling hobbitish today. Off to the Shire! Wait, scratch that— off to OFUM!

Agent Miah and Cali would go to Asgard. Kelok and Unger to Gallifrey, and Carry Onin to Pandora. All of them chosen because those have some similarity to either their origin or where they work a lot, but is not where they originated or work a lot.

(Also, Asgard would be my top choice!)

D - all of the above. But if I had to chose I would have to say either Hogwarts or Gallifrey.

"[T]he Department of Out of Character Hobbits needs me." There's a sentence that's never been uttered before.

And... yikes. Incorporeal agent. That's gonna be interesting to watch.

hS

Doom/Gloom has been one of my favorite PPC agents for a while now, soooooo . . . I'm glad she actually exists now!

Yaaaaaaaaay!

It seems fine to me, but I'm also wondering which continuum Gloom comes from...

 Unfortunately I don't know her origin. Apparently it's a somewhat obscure game?

I don't remember Carry Onin and Nicodemus. Did you actually write the mission where Cadmar and his/her partners rescued them, or is this one of your unfinished tales?

Who shut the bathroom door? I have to ask, because I'm not a native speaker, and I'm trying to learn grammar and punctuation. To me, Gloom watched him retreat, and shut the bathroom door looks like Gloom watched Carry retreat, and than she shut the bathroom door. But that's impossible, because we know that she cannot touch the door. If retreat and shut the bathroom door is what gloom watched Carry doing, I would omit the comma.

Isn't the Floating Hyacint floating in some kind of pond or bassin when Gloom jumps on the spot and hugs the Hyacinth's stalk? Nice stealth pun when we realize later that Gloom doesn't care, because the water cannot wet her.

HG

Sic transit gloria mundi.

He was only 33 years old, too. That really isn't fair.

Best wishes to his family, friends, and colleagues.

I may not have seen much of your work, but you have left an undeniable lasting impact on internet and geek culture. You will be missed by many.

Wow. That's... Damn.

As a fan of his Dead Fantasy series, I say: May you get abundant meal, mead and feast in Sovngarde/Valhalla/Heaven! Rest in peace Monty Oum!

I might be new to the fandom, but I really liked RWBY... Mr. Oum will be missed.

I've only seen one thing he made (Haloid), but that one thing was pure animated eye candy. I appreciate artistic skill, and it always sucks when an artist dies.

Alloy would go comically wide-eyed, consider that this has never happened before, and grab. Smooch. Let go. Consider. "Sorry, I'm not really that into you!"

Ginger would eye them and probably go for a fling if she thought that they were hot. Or drag them cross-continuum bar crawling despite being too young to drink. And probably end up getting into serious trouble.

Marvin would be flustered. He would probably try to back out of the situation, as he would not quite know how to handle it. Then again, if the lover was persistent, he would eventually cave and try to treat her as best as he can.

For Printworthy, it would depend on if she was an equine or not. If she was a pony, he would return the compliment, and offer her a nice night out, to try and know her better. If she was not, however, he would be courteous and thankful for their admiration, but respectfully deny any shared feelings towards them. He is a pony, see, and just does not think of other creatures in that way. Non-pony equines would be on a case-by-case basis.

Jumper would just laugh, perhaps flirt a little, then offer to take them on an adventure. Likely while singing "A Whole New World." What happens next... Well, we shall see.

Doc pretty much wouldn't notice for a long time. Once he did, he wouldn't really know what to do about it for a while, until eventually, awkwardly, explaining he's aromantic and asexual.

Séverine would assume they were teasing her, and march off, insulted. Even though Yoof is man-size, I'm treating him as a puppyish-age mawg, so he wouldn't notice/know what was happening, and Séverine would keep people like that away from him.

Vania. Urm. I still don't have a very clear idea of her sexuality or romantic nature. I think it's because I lack those things, that I'm having difficulty picking up on hers. Nothing feels right so far, so I don't really have an answer for her. Maybe I'll figure it out as I write her more.

Carline's thing is that she lusts after obscure characters. Not totally sure how that would apply to PPC characters. She either would have no interest for anyone from HQ, or she would only be interested in folks from the less common divisions and departments, like the DOOCH or Finance. Being a Sue at heart, her lust is reserved fro canon characters.

Gaspard: Take a good look at this guy. Crooked nose, cystic acne and scars all over his face and shoulders, mixed-race, long history of being kicked/punched/robbed/swirlied at school, and hates himself with the intensity of a billion exploding O-class stars. He's decided that he's better off not bothering anybody-- and besides, if someone was into him by now she'd have shown interest or something. Don't expect him to complain about it: after all, big boys don't cry.

Harris: You're not going to get much out of him: he's about as dense as your average neutron star. Couldn't understand if a woman was flirting with him, no matter how hard she'd try. Did she compliment his looks? Why yes, he is having a pretty good hair day today. Did she just give him a box of chocolates and her RC number? Oh, that's nice: she just wants a chat. Did she grab him by the collar and yell out a confession of love to him? She must be tired and stressed out: take a nap, he says. You'll feel better. Repeat ad nauseam.

Penny: She'd be extremely flattered but would have to turn her would-be suitor down because she's already in a stable long-term relationship with...

Nasir: ...who would very bluntly say no to anybody who'd approach him because he's with Penny.

Yakov: He'd jump right into romance-mode. Hopefully he won't come off as "too desperate" this time. Or "too creepy". Or "too weird".

Luisa: Not interested right now. There are Sues all over her fandom and she's not having any of it.

Well, Cali is in a long term relationship with Cadmar (written by Caddy-shack), and Cali was the one who first had the interest. If it was anyone else, he would blush and stammer and not know what to do. He still does a lot of that with Cadmar (at least as of the last time they appeared in 2012). They are totally still dating in 2015, though.

Agent Miah...I really don't know. She's not particularly interested in sex or relationships, so it would maybe depend on the person.

Kelok is asexual and still deals with trauma from his fic of origin, so he would be immensely uncomfortable and try to escape as soon as possible, and then probably avoid the person and any place he expected them to be.

Unger is kind of a kid, and an immature one at that, so he generally comes across as more mascot material or cute (with a side of arson) than as seriously a potential mate.

Carry on the other hand, is 100% comfortable with sex as a biological imperative and is pretty likely to take them up on the offer, if he thought the other agent was serious with it and that they are also looking at it as a biological imperative. He's not particularly interested in romance and long-term emotional relationships.

ELEPHANTS!

In all seriousness:

Randa would probably get a kick out of it, while Rina would think they were just messing with her. She had... bullying issues for most of her life.

Ari would be confused and flustered. A lot.
Theia was romantically involved with Anebrin, at least briefly.
Tera would be probably be interested, though I'm not sure how her species parses romance.

Lana and Riaa'lzhor are in a committed relationship and have been for several years, so they'd likely just let a new person down gently.
Narav is aromantic, I think, and so would probably decline any kind of romantic relationship offers.

Cepha and Amara are going to end up as an item. Amara is one who would probably be quite confused at a stranger being in love with her, and (like Kala, I imagine) would probably react badly to being suddenly touched.
Fiorano would react like Ari, I think.

Agent!Des would probably blush and stammer, then continue as normal.
Anebrin was romantically involved with another agent.
The Librarian would probably be rather annoyed and would try to avoid that person.
Amris is a drone. A machine. It'll probably be very amused.
Navare, I've no idea.

I'm pretty sure there are some title minis rescued from missions. Let me see . . .

Yeah, there are some made from the Twilight Saga's title. I'm sure there are other examples, too, buuuut I'm not looking through every Mini page to find them. :)

...man, that's just awful, what happened to Zeb. You have my sympathies. *pats back with talons, taking care not to scratch you or something*

Anyway, looking forward to your first mission with him! Given what you've said in previous posts and PMs, it should be pretty fun.

Very nice. I have to admit though, that when when I saw the word Luxray for the first time my first thought was, Is that a misspelling of Luxury?

I missed the whole Pokemon phenomenon by a few years, so I got a chuckle at my own expense there.

Good Interlude!

When did Randa transfer to Bad Slash? Did I miss something during the "My Inner Life" mission?

Anyway, great work. Special mention goes to the scene where Rina and Zeb remember his death. Powerful stuff, man. Probably how I would react if Jackson (Girafarig from my Pearl run who died in Canalave Gym) or Lucy (Fearow from my FireRed run who died in the Celadon Rocket Hideout) or any of my other dead mons showed up at my doorstep IRL/in HQ. :'(

That was a very interesting interlude, and I definitely enjoyed reading it! I'm now looking forwards to the missions! ^^

(... Sorry, I can't really do concrit.)

... then you should probably listen to Nesh, here! For I am about to tell you about a BAD one.

Lord of the Rings: The Third Age. Released for X-Box/Ps2, and Gamecube, I think. I got this when I was a wee caddy (13ish?) because I love RPGs, I liked Lord of the Rings, and there was only 1 gamestore in the town.

I was very disapointed. Later, I read some interesting articles on why it was bad,which add more to the tale. See, they never got more then the movie license, or something to that degree, thus they could not put stuff in that wasn't in the films. So, while you got to play people /technically/ in the movie canon, and /technically/ were taking part in everything, you have no real impact (and any you do is nonsensical).

You play a generic Gondor soldier, Captain of the Citadel Guard. Promoted for his adherence to heroic archetype, no doubt. You're going to Rivendell to find Boromir, because his dad wants him back. Or maybe he forgot his lunch, frankly it doesn't matter much after this point. You are equipped about as well as a hobbit, and Nazgul are your first opponents. Naturally, you win an- oh wait, they stab you and you get saved by a mysterious Elven female.

Turns out she is Sherlock Holmes, as the sight of Crebain makes her realize Saruman is a traitor, and is attacking a convoy of elves right that instant. You go and help, because the plot says o, and then go look for survivors on Caradhras, of all places. You then encounter a Dunedain Ranger(Rare? Pfft, not at all!) who is looking for his dwarf friend. You manage to track him down in Moria. As it turns ou the Watcher reopens the entrance, trying to get the Fellowship, and you get to run in, then hunt down and kill it.

Then you run around making noise, and killing goblins, and chase after the Fellowship more. Yakkity Sax ensues. Oh, and then you jump in to help Gandalf fight the Balrog on the tiny bridge. Hmm, I don't recall that scene... After you help him win (but he still falls) you follow the Fellowship out, learn Boromir is dead, and you've been wasting time. Both the characters and player.

You then follow their trail to Rohan, where Gandalf gives you the job or finding all of Eomer's men. Then you fight in Helm's Deep, where it turns out Saruman can contorl you to fight several cave trolls at once. I forgot the part where the Uruk-hai had cave trolls. Then it turns out that that Idreal (forgive me for not posting names unless relevent, the characters are shallow and 2-d)the female Elf was sent by Gandalf and Galadriel, who knew Saruman could control you, and was to stop you from taking the ring to him. She's also a love interest.

You then get to fight in Osgiliath,where you fight and beat Goth Mog, and the Witch King (killing neither, naturally, and go to Minas Tirith for soem more excitement. A few dozen fights leter you are fighting two Mumakil at once. On foot. And killing them. And after the ghost army wins the battle? Suddenly you are fighting the Eye of Sauron. On top of his tower. No explanation is given. I never beat him, and never went back to the game.

The characters are all shallow, and they barely evolve past stereotypes. They barely have any downtime talk, to get to know eachother, or really explain why they bother doing what they are doing. The fights are tedious because, as said way above, they reuse the same enemies over and over.

Naturally, the most fleshed out party member is the lead, Berethor. We learn he fled from battle long ago because he was stabbed by a Nazgul stab (before the game, mind. so he was stabbed twice, technically.) So he was banished to Rohan. He fell in love in Rohan with a Shieldmaiden, then Saruman used a spell to make him chase after Boromir to steal the ring and take it to him. Said Shieldmaiden is also in the party. So... like Cloud from FF7, maybe?

Sorry for rambling, it's been a while since I've posted. Point is, LotR: The Third Age isn't very good in any sense. I have heard that Shadow of Mordooooooor has fun gameplay, and interestign mechanics. So if you can ignore the fanficesque story, i could be fun. But yeah, reading about OC Do Not Steal Ranger #35 and his best bud the Wraith taking control of orcs made me cringe.

I haven't played the game or seen it played, though, so I don't know.

If you're looking for a goodfic-quality LotR game, though, check out The Lord of the Rings: War in the North. It takes place during LotR, but entirely separately from the main quest. There are one or two things that make me raise my eyebrows a little, but on the other hand, it's sensible about things like the Great Eagles and Radagast, and it wins a lot more points than it loses in my book. For the most part it slots in quite nicely as a story that could have happened in the world.

~Neshomeh

I don’t speak Dutch, but I may know somebody who learned to speak Dutch at a German school near the border to Netherlands. So, if you don’t find a better beta reader, I believe you have my address, or you can find it on my Wiki page.

HG

A continuum I don’t know (except for general knowledge of Greek mythology), a new partner from a continuum I know nearly nothing about – and yet, I love this mission.

Two nitpicks, though:

Zeb didn't exactly want to balance on on just one leg,

one of the the best swordsmen

I’ll miss Randa, but I’m looking forward to seeing more of Zeb.

HG

I'm not familiar with the continuum, but I didn't have to be to get how messed up the fic was. I just... look, Stu, porn stars are people, too. They go to work to pay the bills just like the rest of us. Just because it involves sex doesn't mean they're obsessed with it to a weird and creepy degree. So knock it off. {= |

Random question: how does Eris, Goddess of Discord, figure into the Percy Jackson universe? I dunno if Discord quite equates to Chaos, but if one were looking for a chaotic, female deity for a parent, one could do worse.

The assassination was brilliant. I completely agree, that target was far too perfect to pass up, and it was hilarious. I don't think it came too soon, either.

There were a few other moments that make me laugh aloud, and the two I recall specifically both involved Zeb being clueless. "Hepatitis" and "fruitcake." ^_^ And hey, fresh, homemade fruitcake can be very good, so there!

Zeb is adorable. It might just be my cat-person's "aw, kitty!" instincts kicking in, cuz Luxrays look a bit feline, but I kinda want to cuddle him. And I'm sure he'd appreciate it about as much as the average cat, too. *rolls eyes*

Since Rina sent him to Jenni in the interlude, I now have a plotbunny where she sets him up to get some canon instruction/newbie training from Ilraen. He's a gentle, compassionate guy, and he knows what it's like to be totally clueless and have to learn the ropes in a hurry—at the hands of a far less forgiving partner, at that! I think they'd get along, and the idea of them walking through the Courtyard having intellectual conversations about books or whatever is a nice picture, isn't it? (Also, I plan for Ilraen to become an agent trainer whenever he retires from the DIC, so whee setting up future character developments.)

... And I have just now remembered reading down-thread that Zeb is gay, and oh my god what would Ilraen even do with a Pokémon flirting with him? I do not suggest this would, could, or should be a thing, but the thought of the sheer amount of awkwardness is making me laugh. {X D

I'mma go to bed now, before I get any more bad ideas.

~Neshomeh

This seemed a little short for you, but I guess that's to be expected considering how recently your last mission came out.

Well, you don't find many Sues who are fourteen year-old porn stars. Or who tempt fate to the degree that Roxy did with his target undies.

The list on the Wiki says the process for adding Sues to the list is under review, so I figured I'd post here and ask if Roxy could possibly qualify for the list.

However, it seems that missions are getting shorter into the story before the charges are laid out. Either badfics gone worse and worse, or it's getting more taxing to write very long missions. I weep for the former, but as for the latter, it may be for the best.

Zeb's cluelessness is the best part, especially with the fruitcake joke :P Good work! I'm looking forward to future installments!

Also, is Randa going to make other appearances now that she's in Bad Slash?

Then the homophobic slurs aimed at Nico don't make much sense, since we don't find out about his orientation until The House of Hades, and even then, it remains secret.

Unless the slurs are just supposed to be insults. I'm not really sure about that... I kinda wanted to look it up in the original fic, but I then realized that the whole "14-year-old porn star" thing would probably get me on some kind of list.

That was a skillful job of killing something that could've been really NSFW-y in a way that was still readable. Nice!

And, 'son of Chaos' - um, yeah, no. I'm pretty sure I would've noticed if House of Hades personified Chaos - particularly as a woman. Though I do wonder whether the writer was thinking of Nyx (does she spell it that way, or did Riordan go with Nix? I forget), and got tangled up.

Also: timeline craziness like whoa. If Percy isn't 16 yet, what's Nico even doing at Camp Half-Blood? He ran way after Bianca died, and didn't really come back... uh... ever. Not to mention he not only wasn't openly homosexual - he doesn't seem to have admitted it to himself at that point. (Also, pillar of flame. Wut, Nico. Just, wut.)

One thing I particularly liked: your characterisation of Clarisse just before and after the exorcism. You showed us what 'possessed' looked like, and exactly how it's different from 'normal' - without descending into overkill-levels for either.

(And... hey, if Chaos is 'GAPless', where exactly is Roxy supposed to have... y'know... come out?)

hS

I would hug, kiss you in both cheeks, hug some more, kiss your forehead and then give you a rib crushing hug for good measure, but I'll restrain myself to just give a military salute, you deserve that and more for destroying this piece of dino-poo-poo and send it in a direct line to Tartarus. Lots of respect m'lady.

Regarding the movies... I never got past the 30 minute mark of "The Lighting Thief", I was deeply outraged and disgusted of the way that both source materials were treated, that gave watching it, and have never seen the sequel nor I plan to see it, as far as I'm concerned I see it at the same level of quality than "That-Film-That-Shall-Not-Be-Named".

Finally, here have a Poffin of each flavor for Zeb as a reward!

rest now stus,ashes to ashes and glitter to glitter.
AND GOOD RIDDANCE TO BAD RUBISH!

Just by the mission, I swear that this badfic has to be a troll! It just has to! Like, seriously, who seriously writes stuff like "[the Stu,] now only in his black-brief-and-printed-with-a-target-sign-in-the-butt undergarment, swayed a little in the air, dancing like some kind of whore-slut devoid of morals"? The author couldn't possibly be serious. I was positively eager for the Stu to die...and you did not disappoint.

Also, good work acclimating Zeb to the PPC. Pardon my slowness (I'm sure you explained it before), but what's happening with Randa (both in-universe and IRL)?

Two issues, though:
First, it looks like you inadvertently made a mini:
She's a daughter of Ares who single-handedly took down a drachon all by herself
According to the Percy Jackson Wiki, the spelling is "drakon." Is it amiss?

Secondly, this line:
Zeb's eyes widened, then narrowed. "That is completely unacceptable!" he said, his voice trembling. "Sexual orientation is nothing to be mocked!"

Being native to the Pokemon universe, how would Zeb have such a liberal view of sexual orientation, much less be so incensed at homophobic slurs? Sexual orientation isn't mentioned at all in the anime, and given the Day-Care's workings, I doubt that homosexual pairings feature in the games either.

As a diehard fan of the books (and the movies, to a... lesser extent), I wholeheartedly approve of this. I do agree that the films weren't exactly faithful to the source material, but at least they were, well, tolerable. In my opinion, anyway.

Needless to say, the arrow up the Stu's butt was my favorite part. The title of this mission pretty much says it all. X'D

I imagine that Kala would have it even worse than Zeb does. He at least still has four limbs before and after being disguised; Kala's used to having TWELVE, not to mention a much larger and more stable body.

Great mission, though I admit my PCO knowledge is limited to the first movie.

I think it's an excellent idea.

Judging from the fact that it seems to be about PPC fiction, perhaps a better name would be PPC Story Awards. I was momentarily confused when I first read your post, and thought it was about our favorite fanfiction in general.

Regardless, I like this idea!

I think we should have it in June, when most people's school years/semesters are winding down

Sounds like a good idea, you certainly thought it out.

As for 'Who's going to run it/ What if the same people get nominated' thing, maybe if at least one of your stories won last year, they can't be nominated this year? But then that would potentially cut out some great missions for nomination... I'd need to think about that.

As for 'what if people try to shoehorn in X things', I think the best we could do would be to rely on the honor system. Still, I think attempted shoehorning would be obvious enough.

Other than those potential problems you mentioned, it sounds like a lot of fun!

(Also, I just had the weirdest thought that I would qualify as a newcomer. :P )

This sounds like a fun idea!

DIA's patrol division is equivalent to a modern World One police force in a lot of ways, much like how special response is basically equivalent to a SWAT team. They're less militarised in a lot of respects, but HQ is a beat where everyone there is armed and knows how to use their weapons, plus when an agent snaps it usually gets really messy really quickly, so the DIA's patrol officers are armed and trained accordingly. By necessity, patrol and special response (who have more specialised training of course) officers need to be equipped to deal with any internal or external threat that may pop up, and proficient enough in a confrontation to resolve the incident with minimal harm to themselves or innocents (for lack of a better term, in HQ...).

As for equipment, I imagine there's some variance depending on the needs of the specific officer, and versatility is prized due to the sheer diversity of agents - your kit needs to work just as well on a Discworld troll or whatever as a human, though I imagine if something like a Saiyan or Kryptonian flips out and starts smashing heads patrol's orders are damage control and basically just distraction until special response and/or the Raiders get there. The general guideline is body armour (probably better stuff than kevlar but I never thought on specifics, I imagine this is somewhat up to the individual officer but there are guidelines to follow - it has to be subtle, fitting under the uniform or whatnot instead of DIA officers marching around looking like Imperial Stormtroopers, and strong enough to ward off stuff like sword blows and gunshots without harming the officer too much; super heavy armour is probably for when the DIA needs to crack down on a particularly big problem), the stuff you said (torch, radio, cuffs, etc), sidearm (something that can quickly incapacitate without killing is preferred - I imagine a lot of DIA patrolmen swear by Star Wars blasters or Star Trek phasers since those have stun functions as well as bigger deal functions for when stunning stops being an option, and HFA wands - or the real deal for any officers from Potterverse - would also be handy), and also a portal device so they can get around quickly. While DIA officers are probably trained to navigate HQ, they also need to be able to respond to a crisis within a moment's notice, so being able to zero in on some coordinates and portal right over would be a godsend. The DIA probably has access to at least one HQ map, too, it'd just make sense, but I've been divided on whether to have it just be one big one in DIA Central or to have officers walk around with a gadget that can call up a map hologram like a fancy, HQ-specific GPS. Of course, the map is a moot point for the New Caledonia officers, so they wouldn't have that gadget. Central has an armoury any officer can access, and some guidelines as to equipment standards, but as long as an officer can make it work - and of course, there's mandatory training time to ensure competency - Lieutenant Andretti and the Tiger Lily probably aren't too fussed about what's "standard issue" among Patrol Division.

These are just my first thoughts right off the top of my head, and of course DIAers who need to respond to a specific type of situation are likely to go back to Central and get what they need if they don't have it on hand right at that moment, but I hope it's helpful; I can elaborate further on stuff if you like. I've put a good bit of thought into this stuff, the only reason I haven't written too much on the DIA is due to lack of time/ideas/having a bunch of other projects going. And if you want help bouncing stuff around, pretty sure you know my email; always glad to help out.

I mean, that would be pretty funny...

Ah well. I doubt I actually have the time to write that right now, but...I guess we'll see!

~DF

Not an event, though. A straightforward RP is probably the easiest option - it's basically 'fire and forget', if you can come up with a premise. More complex events, naturally, take more time out of the starter.

One suggestion, if people were interested, would be 'the ships you want to see': list the ships you'd love to read but have never seen (crossover or in-canon), and people can wander through and see if anything inspires them to write it. It'd basically be a 'stuff about us PPCers' thread, with the possibility of stories wandering in over the next month or so.

("But that would mean the stories weren't in the same thread as the beginning!" Yes, I know. That's how we did the first Shipfest, y'know. ;) In this case, since the stories would be full-fledged fanfic, they could simply be legitimate plugs which mention they were inspired by the thread)

hS

Is that a Culture drone?

Is that a CULTURE CHARACTER in the PPC?

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE- *happyboom*

I'm afraid I don't know anything about either continuum either, but it was still enjoyable! The Reality Room execution was my favorite part. *tosses cakefetti*

I'm glad you got to write something less brain-breaking than your other missions :)

Not familiar with either of the two continua, but this was pretty fun to read! *tosses congratulatory Spikes*

I did spot a typo, however... the Berserk Defence Programme of the Book of Darkness would appear and would be obliterated by the Asura’s Arc-en-ciel cannon
Shouldn't there be a period at the end of that sentence? Uh...

>Live action
>Link is involved
>Link will have to speak at some point to avoid looking like the insane kleptomaniac pot-smashing hero we know he is

I'm scared, guys.

I have mixed feelings on this. On one hand, Netflix has yet to disappoint on their new original series. On the other hand, the original cartoon's reputation will be quite difficult to overcome. This has a lot of potential, though - the article compared it to a family-friendly Game of Thrones, so perhaps we will get a glimpse of how Hylian politics truly work. Also, I'm sad that the show has already lost a potential big name: Robin Williams. He was one of the biggest fans of LoZ in existence, and something like this would have been right up his alley. His daughter Zelda shared his love of the series, so perhaps she'll have some input after all - from what I've heard, the both of them talked about potential roles with Nintendo frequently. Robin was the go-to guy to play Professor Oak if needed, for example.

I guess I'll have to get started on the games at long last, won't I? If this is going to be a thing, we're going to see a fanfic explosion, I'll bet. But still, it sounds cool (hopefully better than what I heard the cartoon was like).

...drat, I bet Randa went ahead and deleted my save file on her Ocarina of Time game. Off to find myself a copy! ...and then I'll have to finish my copy of Twilight Princess, and play Wind Waker, and borrow Darkotas' copy of Skyward Sword... This is going to take a while, isn't it?

(Also, dangit, Skarmory, you beat me to it!)

... NO, WAIT! That's not what I-- It's too late, isn't it? sigh!

Seriously, though, I think it's going to be decent, at the very least. Netflix usually makes good series, and since they're actually working with Nintendo, they probably won't make the same mistakes as the original show.

In all seriousness, though, I'm a bit skeptical myself - but if this turns out to be true, and more importantly if they do it well, my armor bird screech of ecstasy will probably be heard for miles. Especially if Nintendo is helping to produce it, because that way you can be sure they'll be faithful to the franchise.

For my taste, I personally think it would be fun to see something like this introduce brand-spanking new characters, like they did with Lana from Hyrule Warriors.

1/ As far as physical strength and endurance goes, the upper limit is probably Fingolfin's battle with Morgoth:

But at the last the King grew weary, and Morgoth bore down his shield upon him. Thrice he was crushed to his knees, and thrice arose again and bore up his broken shield and stricken helm. But the earth was all rent and pitted about him, and he stumbled and fell backward before the feet of Morgoth; and Morgoth set his left foot upon his neck, and the weight of it was like a fallen hill. Yet with his last and desperate stroke Fingolfic hewed the foot with Ringil, and the blood gushed forth black and smoking and filled the pits [left by] Grond. ('The Silmarillion', Chapter 18)

Morgoth, at this point, is huge - he's described as a like a tower, or a stormcloud. But Fingolfin not only survived - and got back up from - three blows from this giant - he also survived having Morgoth step on his neck long enough to cut his foot, and deeply. So that speaks well for both strength and endurance.

Switching to the Third Age, we find Legolas wanting to keep running in Rohan after a full day, when Gimli is exhausted (and ignore what the movies say: dwarves are quite clearly built for endurance). He was also the only one not borne down by the troubles on Caradhras - though that might have been more to do with being able to run on top of the snow.

Switching to another famous elven ability - sight - there's a lovely article which goes into detail on that. Suffice to say that Legolas would be able to notice within under ten minutes the motion of Mars against the starfield - a human would have to wait ten hours.

2/ "... this is what your folk would call magic, I believe; though I do not understand clearly what they mean; and they seem to use the same word of the deceits of the Enemy. But this, if you will, is the magic of Galadriel." (LotR II, Chapter 7)

I'm glad you're not asking about all magic in Arda - that one's a really tricky subject. But as to the elves, there are... maybe five kinds of 'magic':

a) The Light of Valinor, as seen on Glorfindel in Fellowship. This is a byproduct of having lived under the light of the Trees, and is basically an 'inner light'; in the Unseen realm, it manifests as an almost blinding glow, and is at minimum terrifying to Nazgul. Obviously, it's only present if you, uh, lived in Valinor before the Trees were murdered.

b) Foresight and Insight, or to give them their proper names, apacen and tercen. These are pretty much what the sound like - apacen is the kind of future vision Galadriel obtained through her Mirror, and tercen is her... semi mind-reading. She may or may not possess actual telepathy as well, I don't think that's made clear.

c) Craft. Elven-work is, um, better. ^^ Ringil, the sword of Fingolfin, wounded Morgoth eight times, while a Numenorean blade dissolved after stabbing the Lord of the Nazgul just once. Furthermore, elven-craft can enhance the properties of objects above what is natural:

"Are these magic cloaks?" asked Pippin, looking at them with wonder.

"I do not know what you mean by that," answered the leader of the Elves. "They are fair garments, and the web is good, for it was made in this land. They are elvish robes, certainly, if that is what you mean. Leaf and branch, water and stone: they have the hue and beauty of all these things under the twilight of Lorien that we love; for we put the thought of all that we love into all that we make..." (LotR II, Chapter 8)

A few pages on, we come across Galadriel's gifts: at a minimum, the Phial of Galadriel is enhanced, and quite possibly the earth in Sam's box as well. The boats, the ropes - even the lembas of the Galadhrim is 'magically' enhanced.

But this enhancement isn't 'add any attribute you like'; it seems to only make things more themselves. The cloaks, woven light and camoflaged, become extra light and super-camo. As to how this was done...

d) Song. Don't knock singing - it's the very method of the creation of Arda. And it's most definitely a tool of elvish magic:

And Luthien now was left alone.
A magic song to Men unknown
she sang...
... and all names of things
tallest and longest on earth she sings:
the locks of the Longbeard dwarves; the tail
of Draugluin the werewolf pale;
the body of Glaurung the great snake;
the vast upsoaring peaks that quake
above the fires in Angband's gloom...

Song is the medium by which Luthien enhances her craft - in this case, she's imbuing her own hair with the properties it already possesses: length, and darkness. When she's done, she has enough to weave a cloak and rope, and darkness/night enough to bring down sleep on anyone she chooses - up to and including Morgoth.

And music isn't just used in craft (or by half-Ainur): the most famous passage from the Lay of Leithian runs, in part, as follows:

He [Sauron] chanted a song of wizardry,
Of piercing, opening, of treachery,
Revealing, uncovering, betraying.
Then sudden Felagund there swaying
Sang in answer a song of staying,
Resisting, battling against power,
Of secrets kept, strength like a tower...

Here, both Sauron and Finrod (Felagund) are trying to enchant not an object, but a person - Finrod himself. Sauron uses 'the deceits of the Enemy' - Finrod, in contrast, tries to enhance his own nature. He fills his song with resistance, with 'trust unbroken', and with 'all the magic and might... of Elvenesse'.

Ultimately, he fails, because Sauron turns his own song against him: he twists Finrod's memories of 'the sighing of the Sea beyond/Beyond the western world, on sand/On sand of pearls in Elvenland' with the reality of the murder of the Trees, and of Feanor's kinslaying.

The wolf howls. The ravens flee.
The ice mutters in the mouths of the Sea.
The captives sad in Angband mourn.
Thunder rumbles, the fires burn--
And Finrod fell before the throne.

But still - I'd love to see a story about elven battle-song. ^^

(All of which suggests a new spin on Galadriel's 'Namarie', which ends with her singing: 'May it be that thou [Frodo] shalt find Valimar!' Poetry, a hope, a wish - or an enchantment and a spell? You decide.

e) Illusion. This one shows up mostly among people who knew Melian. She, of course, spun a web of illusion and magic around Doriath, to keep unfriendly creatures out. Later, Finrod used similar illusion - 'by the arts of Felagund their own forms and faces were changed into the likeness of Orcs'. And waaaaay down in history, Thranduil (whose father was a member of Melian's court) apparently uses something related to spirit his feasts away from Thorin's company.

But all of these sort of fall under 'craft'. Finrod had to outfit his party with Orcish gear and weapons, which he could draw on the essence of; Melian used the already-tangled woods of Doriath; Thranduil had Mirkwood to draw on. The idea that an elf could, say, create an illusion of an elephant, is unsupported by the Legendarium.

f) [Okay, I lied, there's six] The Rings. I've discussed this on Netilardo. The evidence suggests that the Three Rings were created to sustain the world, which is what Galadriel uses Nenya for. (We can ignore Gandalf's apparent use of Narya - he's a Maia, there's different interactions there). And apart from communicating with the wearer of the One Ring, that's all they're for: freezing time in place, so that the world of the Eldar doesn't pass away.

3/ Galadriel, Thranduil... yipes. Well. Galadriel is a warrior, so she could be enhancing her 'scary' aspect... nah, sorry, I think the best explanation for that is 'PJ doesn't know what starlight looks like'. The book describes starlight in the scene by the Mirror, and her 'Storm Queen' scene in B5A would also make more sense with starlight (known for its evil-banishing properties). Actually, I'd swear I saw her holding the Phial in that scene - I wonder if the Dark/Evil/Scary thing was added in post-production.

Thranduil is much easier: movie!Thranduil was supposedly scarred by a dragon, but we've already established he could have access to 'enhancing' illusions. The illusion of your own face being undamaged must be quite simple.

4/ I think most of this has been answered above. There's no fundamental differences between the tribes of the Quendi - the only determining factors are: whether they saw the Trees in their glory, whether they knew Melian, and whether they have a Ring. Galadriel, of course, fulfils all three - and she and Celebrimbor are the only people in history to have done so (and 'Brim may never have met Melian).

This has been your overly-long answer to a Tolkien trivia question of the week. ^_^ Well, you asked!

hS

The Canon Library was dark - of course it was. That was the way the Canon Librarian preferred it, and since he had managed to obtain absolute authority in his own domain, no-one was prepared to argue.

Admittedly, that was because they figured he'd threatened, intimidated, or blackmailed the Flowers into letting him run the place his own way. If people knew that he'd actually just sulked at them until they gave in, he probably wouldn't be quite so respected.

But it was dark - the kind of darkness that comes from spending your life in a perpetual inner gloom, and then having that magnified by certain supernatural events the Canon Librarian preferred not to think about. The sole denizen of the Library sat, peacefully reading, in what was halfway between a den and a nest. And then someone opened the door, and electric light burned in.

The Canon Librarian dropped his book in shock. Not at the fact that someone was intruding on his peaceful domain - that happened often enough - but at the twin facts that the agent was some sort of lion thing with sparks of electricity flying off its fur - and that it wasn't waiting at the door, but coming straight inside.

The Canon Librarian's usual technique was to snap, 'What?', but that didn't seem enough this time. Getting to his feet, he growled out, "What exactly do you think you're doing?"

Or rather, he tried to growl; it came out as more of a squeak. Regardless, the creature looked into the shadows, blinked, and said, "Uh, reading?"

"Reading." The Canon Librarian managed to get his voice under control. "And what, exactly, makes you think that this is a place to read? Does this look like a library to you?"

"Uh..."

"... shut up. Just. Shut up."

---

'Hey, hS, I've noticed you seem to be responding to a lot of stories with ficlets of late. What gives?'

Well asked, dear reader. I was remembering the days of the DCPS, when case-workers would respond to missions featuring their charges, and I thought: hey, why can't the Infrastructure agents under my aegis do the same thing? I enjoy writing, PPCers in general enjoy reading - what's to lose? And thus, this happened.

hS

... it summons the same mini into the world, instead of making new copies of the type of mini? I learn something new today. Also, "well, duh?" to knowing that Remus is a werewolf? I thought she may try to seduce or harm him or something.

I’m overworked reading so much in such a short time, but I cannot not read your missions, they are too good.

Anyway, the usual nitpicking:

The Sue use her fire powers to heat up some sausage for Ron,
Tense shift.

and the scene swirled, dumping Zeb in the middle of the first head girls' dormitory.
You probably meant "first year girls’ dormitory", or "first-year girls’ dormitory" (JKR writes “first-years” with a hyphen) or maybe "first-year-girls’ dormitory" (I’m not sure whether JKR ever used something similar to the latter).

Also, beginning three consecutive sentences with "He" (starting with "He opened the bag ...") is a bit repetitive.

Seven years in three chapters? What did this chick think?

HG

The title said it all: WhatThe indeed.

A few questions:
1) How is Zeb human in the beginning of the story? Disguise Generator? D.O.R.K.S.? You might want to consider adding a line or two to explain what happened. And by the way, does Zeb have to be human in order to read? I'd think that a Pokemon that is able to see through walls would have no problem reading a book.

2)Zeb tilted his head. "Say, Rina, if the Sue's supposed to be Harry's age, how old would Tonks—?"

"Seven," Rina replied curtly. "Sues are always making Remus an inadvertent pedophile, it's disgusting."

Being that I'm not that well-versed in Potterverse lore, could you please explain the math? According to the Harry Potter Wiki, Tonks was born in 1973. If the Sue was born at the same time as Harry, then wouldn't Tonks have been in her late teens, if not in her twenties, at the time of Harry's birth?

3) "You know, I think Luna can almost see through SEP fields as well," she continued. "My second mission, I could have sworn she could see me and Randa."
Do you have an MLP mission in the works? Or am I barking up the wrong fandom?

3)This one's an actual error:
"All that happens is Sue helps Harry and Hermione save Sirius, she visits daddy, Harry gets the 'firebolt'—" she nudged the mini through a portal. "and there's a stupid sock-puppet author's note. I can do without that."

The first letter of the parenthetical should be capitalized, and you should use another em-dash to re-introduce the narrative, since you cut her off with an em-dash:

"Harry gets the 'firebolt'—"
She nudged the mini through a portal.
"—and there's a stupid sock-puppet author's note."

Here, a single-use taser batarang for Agent Rina Davies, use it wisely. Don't ask how I got it, is better for thy sanity to not ask. *disappers into the shadows*

That was a satisfying read :) *gives Zeb some Berries*

In that case, you coud have sent it to the Forgotten Realms or Golarion, let the local adventurers take care of it.

Regardless, this was a very silly mission.

PS: I like Inheritance knowing it's not that good. My favorite character is Rhünon. I really hope that didn't make a mini-Urgal.

I really, really like Zeb. Nonhuman agents are always fun, especially ones whose differences are played up a bit. Great stuff! =]

I was laughing so hard I woke my mom. Oops.
Anyway, swell mission, but you might want to run a quick punctuation check - I think I spotted a couple double spaces in the text.