Jun 2014 Archive, part c

The Mighty Stars is NSFW (I'd recommend that one as amazingly well-done smutfic) but I think the sequel is okay.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10139213/1/The-Shadows-of-Twilight

For a brief period, Azog and Lord Elrond came together, loved one another, and learned to see each other in a different light. But the hatred between elves and orcs could not be conquered - so Azog left. Months later, Elrond has decided to seek him out. If the elves will not accept Azog, perhaps the orcs will accept him. Sequel to "Of the Mighty Stars". Azog/Elrond

Because I found an Ice Age/Hunger Games crossover that is quite bad:

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8307971/1/Quarter-Quell

Oh, and as if that wasn't enough? It has six sequels. Six of them. And if you thought the first fic was bad enough...

*whimper*

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8462483/1/The-Cavern-s-Secret
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8475847/1/Prisoner-of-the-Stone
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8488469/1/The-Blue-Bolt
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8512763/1/Mark-of-the-Wolves
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8542578/1/Serpent-s-Fang
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8557106/1/The-End

I'm probably going to put this on the unclaimed list soon enough. I'd do a PPC mission of this myself, but I'm already in the process of snarking the whole series for the Library and I generally don't like to snark things twice, so I leave it to you guys.

I think it is one of a short series about the Rouges. They appear to be a world-hopping duo. Beware of homophone problems, not really homophone problems, capitalization neglect, but they seem okay on punctuation by comparison.

"I need my mead’s!" because he was hyperventilating.

Half Life 2, Wall-E, Portal 3 crossover Half Life 3, and I linked the Portal fic.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7551882/1/Rouge-Guardians-portal

Author quote:

OK so I have no idea what I’m doing but… I’m doing it! And you can’t stop me!

Its for teens for language. lots of it! well… not THAT much

Also I fail at grammar and spelling so tell me if I missed spelling and stuff… and the only thing I own is Cyra and Cody.

I don't have a login yet, could someone add this to the unclaimed badfic list under Harry Potter?

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/3145509 Eggs-in-My-Lap


A little mature, a little squick, but I don't think it's properly NSFW.

It's not really too horrible, more corny in a don't "write while taking cold medicine" way. I didn't read enough to see SPaG problems.

England would have Canadian Bacon, right?

I don't know much about owls, but I don't think even a magical owl would have mammal pregnancy symptoms? Do they get too heavy to fly and have the eggs all at once?

I think there might be some liberties with the Potterverse as well. Can the flue network be used like a telephone to call the Ministry and get transferred around by secretaries?

I know nothing about The Walking Dead, but I'm pretty sure magic swords and wolves do not feature. (Unless the fic is an AU and she forgot to tell us.)

Also, since the badfic thread I attempted to make has been buried (oops), here are a couple I found in the Pit:

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10412470/1/A-Deeper-Wound-Than-Love
Classic Sue. Seriously, this could come from any 'verse at all and I'd have the same reaction.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9724969/1/Forgotten
Pretty good SPaG, but the narration is a mite confusing and my Sue-radar went off reading the summary.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/894267/1/
I call vanilla Crunch-coated Dibs on her. (Bad pun is bad.)

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10467044/1/Warm-my-cold-heart
[nope intensifies]

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10377492/1/Aqua-Blue
Ai yah tien ah, the grammar errors. (Also, there's a Sue.)

Well - to state/restate the obvious, languages evolve. English is changing every day, both in slow and gradual ways and in more immediate ones; some of these changes are welcomed, some are scorned, which is which depends mostly on the racial and socioeconomic status of the population where the change is seen to have originated*, but most eventually do make their way into standard lexicons, only to be pushed out later...

But how does this relate to a fictional language, like Tolkien's Quenya and Sindarin? As far as we know, the populations who "originally" used them aren't around, still using them, allowing them to evolve as they get used conversationally. In that sense, they are essentially dead languages; like Latin, or Old English, the point of learning them tends to be for very specific purposes of understanding either a document - Elvish poetry, for example - or a very, very specific subset of people. So to that extent, it makes sense to treat them... well, like Basque. You read the materials, you learn the languages, and then you use the language in whatever way you had intended - say, to write poetry or communicate with excellent geek friends.

The thing about the evolving process of Tolkien's work being published, I guess, in the way it seems they're doing it, is that it feels really artificial. Languages evolve in a very organic, messy, chaotic process, taking their cue from pretty much every aspect of the cultures they inhabit and other overlapping languages and cultures. If these languages are going to evolve they'd do so by being spoken. Which means, quite possibly and if enough people start picking them up, that they'll wind up evolving in two different directions - a vernacular, informal version (which, given the predilections of linguists and the folks likely to learn Elvish, is still going to be probably quite formal), and the version that the scholars eventually come out with in a few decades when all of Tolkien's work has been pored over enough times.

Either way, interesting times!

*of course, eventually the "bad" dialects of English, because they're spoken by a demographic generally disapproved of by gatekeepers, becomes cool and rebellious, and catches on, leading to essentially appropriation of a dialect by restless and rebellious youth, leading to backlash by the original speakers of said dialects, leading to a lot of confusion about whether it's okay to speak a dialect of English that's been used as a tool of oppression for social credit if you're never likely to be oppressed by those selfsame gatekeepers, or whether it's just a part of linguistic culture that dialects catch on over time. For more information, see ~23% of Tumblr.

But you did raise an interesting question. Personally, I wouldn't have an issue with reading all those papers, but then again, I'm going into English and linguistics have always interested me. In the meantime, I'm not going to refrain from using Elvish. It seems to me that it's very unfair for them to make us wait. Like you said, I'm ready now.

But on the other hand, I want to have my Elvish as correct as possible. I hate to make mistakes, especially when someone put so much work into it. This of course re - and I forgot what I was saying.

I don't think Tolkien would have a finalized version. Only dead languages are static. I also don't get the idea he would mind people using it much, though he might wish they would all study harder or something. I know I would.

Here, have a tin of 1UP Mushroom candy. :)

Cool beans. I present you with this magical, Canadian $2 coin, which duplicates itself back into your pocket after being inserted into a vending machine or arcade machine, and a set of Ultimate Ears earbuds!

Happy birthday to you, dude.

Sorry about that! Happy happy birthday to you! Have some cake and a Wooper from Pokemon! :D

I had no idea you were that old! :P

But f'real - have an excellent day, and an epic year.

¿Cómo celebrarás/celebraste su cumpleaños? Espero que hoy será/fue un buen día para tí.

Also surprise birthday hug.

Mazaltov! Many generic best wishes!

Also, I should really finish beta'ing that mission.

*showers Herr with packing peanuts*

-Aila

Neshomeh got the cake, so I suppose I'll get the drinks. Root beer for everyone!

Have some Convenient Cake. It is always the favorite flavor of anyone who eats it. {= )

~Neshomeh

Most of them are epic alternate timelines of worlds. From japan, to Rome, to Medieval Europe, and thanks to mods, even Middle earth have their stories.

But i provide you with one comedic example. Behold, the Cuman Cake Confederacy!

http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?189367-SS-AAR-Cuman-Cake-Confederacy-\*COMPLETE*

If it's a badly done dramatization, I see no problem with sporking it. (You could get a few quick laughs with the agents complaining about unoriginal plots, too. Maybe.)

Since we do spork fics that copypasta entire canon scenes, I don't think that sporking AARs would be too much of a problem.

They cause chaos, just the way minis are supposed to. *evil grin*

For the Sly Cooper series, I'd vote for mini-Clockwerks, simply because I for one would love to see tiny, evil-dispositioned robotic owls take down a Sue.

I miss the hills of Ansalon, and the kender villages. I miss the mountain home of the gnomes, and the Inn of the Last Home.

At the same time, I miss shredding the streets, or swinging above them. I miss being a superhero that would only be cool in the 90s.

I miss the private worlds and characters I created in my head, based on a mish-mash of a dozen books, comics, and video games. I miss using a keyblade to fight Trollocs along Raistlin Majere and Red Sonja.

Gods pity me, but I miss my stupid gary stu-like fantasy self from when I was ten, and all the impossible adventures I had as him. Which probably isn't exactly what you're talking about, but it fits the theme of fantastic nostalgia.

Especially the closet ones that lead to Narnia, and the ones hidden cleverly behind the schools that lead to stranger places by far. I miss having true companions who didn't just accept me for who I was, but actually preferred me that way.

I miss exploring underwater and outerspace civilizations. I miss flying spaceships. I miss the bubble-shaped martian colonies and the impossible martian canals. I miss navigating labyrinths and learning the true names of dragons.

(I also think most people my age miss Hogwarts - I certainly miss being in Ravenclaw, though maybe not getting lost on the staircases.)

I miss exploring strange new worlds. I miss seeking out new life and new civilizations.

Oh what I would give to go once more where none have gone before...

THE EMPEROR... sure misses being able to walk.

I miss Mars. I miss sitting in the little cafes in Odessa, watching the waves of the Hellas Sea crash against the breakwater as the sun sinks and Phobos rises in the west.

I miss my ship - a battleworn old Akira, but mine nonetheless. Free to save the quadrant one planet at a time.

And I keep catching myself looking upwards for dragons...

The stories we tell ourselves are as much a part of who we are as our history is. Nostalgia doesn't care about whether a place is real or not, it only cares how much you care for its memory.

I've been many "theres." I stood--for Gilead, for the Calla--against Thunderclap's wolves alongside Roland's ka-tet. I defended the hallways of Balamb Garden with the other SeeDs when the Galbadian soldiers attacked. I wandered through the Labyrinth with Sarah. I was on the bridge of the Rachel when Jake gave the order to ram the Blade Ship (and wish I could have stayed longer; I miss them all dearly.) I watched the unconscious Terra make it back to safety while the Realm of Darkness closed in around Aqua and me. I danced with the Nubians as we celebrated the safety of our princess Aida.

None of those things happened, yet I still experienced them. Not physically, in the world around me, but emotionally, in my head? They absolutely happened. The fact that they didn't actually happen doesn't devalue the experience I had. I think that's why we can feel nostalgia for these things: the events aren't real, but the experience itself is.

I think this is also why I tend to write scenery porn-levels of description. I see those places--see them very well--because I've been there.

I miss Fangorn. Sometimes I think the quiet smoldering rage of watching old forests be swallowed by housing developments is tied directly to that nostalgia for a forest that never existed. I miss Tortall, too, even though the Emelan series was my favorite. And, even though I've only a passing familiarity with the 'verse, the Isle of Roke is a powerful place in my dreams and longing.

It's funny, I was just talking today to a friend about the longing, desire, thirst for things we do not understand, which cannot be articulated, and how it is such an important and central part of us. Everyone finds that differently, but it was C.S. Lewis, I think, who pointed it out as one of the greatest connectors of people, and I think it's something that makes up so much art and literature. Tolkien wasn't just describing a beautiful forest, he was reaching for the articulation of a very specific place in the heart, not just the mind, that resonates so strongly with those of us who articulate that desire in the same direction.

(Kinda cool, actually; as we were talking, driving down from the mountains back into town, the rays of sunlight literally filled the valley where town lies, bending through the clouds, and on the southern horizon, dark clouds turned into rain over the hills. It was one of those odd moments where - Calvin and Hobbes, right? - the landscape oddly reflected the conversation.)

As such I miss the sands of Kharak and the Cathedral of Kadesh.

Like you said, I've never actually been there. I can go back, insomuch as anyone can, at any point in time. The only time I can remember not missing it is before I read it, holding a copy of The Last Battle and wondering what the heck this was and should I maybe read it?

I miss the Shire too. This is a little different, though. I feel like I used to have a different image of the Shire than I do now. A pre-movie image, perhaps? I also feel like there was so much more of it once, but I forgot and now I can't find it again. :,(

Now that you've got me thinking about it, I miss a lot. I miss Rohan. I miss Prydia so much I can't even read those books anymore. There's a ridiculous land from my dreams once that I miss so much that every time I go to sleep I try to dream about it. I never have, and perhaps it's for the best, as that particular land is based off a real place. A mansion that only appears in nightmares, but I still want to be there.

I miss people too; people I never knew, who never existed. Not even fictional people, just people who never were. A confused four-year-old's conglomeration of one of my uncles and my granddad, I think. A boyfriend who never wore anything but green - but I've never had a boyfriend. A pet owl - but who keeps owls as pets in the real world?

I've never missed fictional characters like that. Sometimes I miss my own characters, but it's never this sharp but deep stabbing feeling, like I'm truly missing something from my life, something I once had. That moment when it catches you unawares and you find you're almost -

Okay, I need to look into this stupid sentimentality. But yeah, I get what you're saying. I'm also glad I'm not the only one.

Doesn't sound crazy in the slightest. I'll join you. *offers refreshing socially acceptable beverage of your choice and a pick of comfortable spots*

No, you don't sound crazy. At least, not to me (and I am only supposedly sane). Especially the friends part. I've been around for about three years (wait, that much? Huh), but I've been drifting on and off. I do, however, experience something rather similar to what you've described in another place: this RP. The RP is always there, but the people change. Some move on, some return after disappearing... the connections between people shift. Sometimes I look back and sigh in melancholia (when I don't cringe, that is).

...I have to admit that I haven't seen Wreck-it Ralph, so if I say anything that doesn't fit the nature of these characters, just ignore it.

I'd like to evoke the geth from the Mass Effect video game franchise. Geth are essentially self-aware computer programs that are uploaded into servers or mobile platforms for various purposes. Like the characters you described, geth are "just code" as well and can't exist like we do in the Real World; they are confined to computers.

You could find a way to isolate the characters' data, save it somewhere, and later release them in a HQ computer-- or even in a robot body if DoSAT is given the materials and motivation to build it. You just gotta watch out for the computer's battery life.

...that in the canon itself, at least some of the characters are aware of the fact that they're code. It was the concept at the heart of why Ralph destroyed Vanellope's car upon King Candy saying "glitches can't exit the game", remember?

At any rate, though, I'm with AdmiralSakai on his particular solutions, though I don't know what would work for Wreck-It Ralph. One thing I can think of is to actually have the character inhabit a specialized arcade cabinet developed by DoSAT that can plug into the wall, and then their partner can plug a mobile gaming console or something like that into the wall so that the WIR characters can sort of tag along for missions, and then take the shenanigans from there. (After all, Ralph was able to get into two games with vastly superior graphics via walking through the outlets, right?) It's just a possibility, though, so take it with a grain of salt.

I was initially going to go with the last because I couldn't imagine how knowing or not knowing you were digital would change that fact, but actually it matters quite a lot- video games are not, internally, related to computers in any way, so Azeroth is just as "real" as Middle Earth.

Therefore, I think whatever rules apply in-universe would apply here- if they can't enter the physical world in any way in canon, they cannot do so in Headquarters either...

BUT this can easily be changed for authorial convenience- running them through the laser from Tron or a Star Trek mobile hologram emitter could make them tangible.

This fic looks kind of like what you had in mind with the whole superhero angle, but I'm not sure. Have a look, tell me what you think.

The first two that come to my mind from the description are wind and super speed. Do some characters have those already?

Maybe she can manipulate cloth like Uzume from Sekirei.

Maybe she can make her nails long and sharp.

Maybe her sleeves serve as some type of hammer space.

If you don't have elemental powers covered, maybe she can manipulate wind.

...that I don't know anything about Renegade Reinterpretations. I should really read that, shouldn't I? Many thanks for the link, I'll be sure to check it later.

Since I can't determine if your characters fit well into the AU without having read the source material, I can only make broad comments on their personalities from an outsider's perspective.

Gul: he sure fits the bill for a Not Nice guy, you've made that clear. My only gripe about this guy is his lack of military service: Turian social structure basically revolves around the army, so the fact that he dodged the draft or something is very curious. Doubly so because he's a biotic: he would possess incredible potential for destruction if that talent could be refined and applied for military purposes.

Ren: I see what you did there. Moving on: I like him and I'm not saying this because I'm a quarian fanboy! I think you've managed to capture the "amoral techie" character quite well. I really like the fact that he takes time to do family things during his workload. That's something stereotypical Not nice characters don't usually do.

Teron: not much to go on here. She sounds like a fairly generic experienced hired gun to me.

Teron Argovigian

Female turian

~48 (20-30 equivalent?)

Teron is Rillek's primary muscle, a seasoned special operations fighter and (very briefly) Blue Suns merc. She's one of the less-developed characters in terms of tangibles. I'm not 100% sure where she came from or why she works for Rillek- I think she was a part of the Cerberus alien infiltrator program who somehow managed to get the equivalent of an “honorable discharge” and signed up with Rillek because she has nowhere else to go, but I really don't know.

She's essentially a walking action movie in terms of capabilities, and personality as well- if an area has Teron Argovigian sent to it, things will blow up before she's done. She's neither subtle nor particularly concerned with collateral damage, and quite ruthless in terms of interrogations, etc. It's possible that Rillek was originally grooming her as a successor, before abandoning that when it became clear she was a blunt instrument with no head for politics (which begs the question of just who Rillek's successor is, since he definitely expects this to be a decades-long operation and Ren will leave as soon as the paychecks stop). I don't think she really enjoys killing people or “the thrill of the hunt” per se, so much as she just likes doing really awesome things against really horrible people.

One thing I'm sure of is that Tron does not like asari. Not sure why, or even if there is a reason, but the concept of aliens that can get inside her head remotely inspires what can only be described as pure terror, and not used to being afraid of pretty much anything she channels that into general rage.

Ren'Zalgo vas Orpheon

Male quarian

~56 (40-50 equivalent, may change as quarian lifespan is poorly established)

“Gul Rillek... Strange man, I'm not entirely convinced he doesn't just want to declare himself Primarch and take over the rest from there. But he pays well.”

Since Gul Rillek has all the technical skill of my grandmother on acid, he's hired a quarian engineer to be his combination bodyguard and technical adviser. Ren'Zalgo vas Orpheon is there to, among other things, manage Rillek's wide variety of research and development projects, explain those projects in words a military linguist cum political operator can understand, and remind said linguist that you need to click “save” before turning off the omni-tool, it doesn't just “write things down” automatically.

Ren cares little about Gul's long-term goals, although he does take a quiet professional pride in how far his assistance has advanced them. Largely amoral in his professional capacity, he's mostly concerned with maintaining the large paycheck that he sends back to his family on the Migrant Fleet. There's a sort of middle-class dignity to him quite at odds with what he often participates in: wake up too late, skip breakfast, identify possible Reaper indoctrination methods, business lunch with the ExoGeni representatives, video call with the kids, review systems analysis of geth body parts, send message to that ex-Teltin doc, eat dinner thinking of your wife, keep Gul from deleting his hit list again, make travel plans to visit the Fleet next time it's near a relay, go to bed early.

And good Gods, what he does for a living. Gul Rillek sees Council restrictions on AI, genetic augmentation, and other fringe technologies as pointless, is enamored with human Upbringing and Reaper indoctrination, and actively pursues advanced conventional technologies for leverage and outright personal use. Since he works with Cerberus and even less savory operations, that results in a helluva lot of weird and dangerous things going on, and Ren oversees all of it.

There's too much research occurring for Ren to get involved personally with much of it, and the Rillek operation can't afford to do much of it in-house. Therefore, Ren's primary research function is to act as a go-between with a lot of corporations and outside actors, including Salarian academic bodies, major defense contractors, and Systems Alliance military research groups.

While not wearing a labcoart on a day-to-day basis, Ren is still a highly competent technician, and can use those abilities to defend himself in a fight. As a result, he is often sent to particularly important operations to oversee them personally, generally those with a strong technical component but also anything requiring precision or careful planning, things that Teron is incapable of properly executing. There's little business-related information that Ren keeps from his boss, or his boss from him- while neither has the time or energy to fully understand what the other does, they try to provide the most salient points to prevent chain-of-command screwups. Over all, their working relationship is good- Gul's estate has seen a friendly visit from the Zalgo family on at least one occasion.

Gul Rillek

Male turian

~82 (50-60 equivalent)

“You're saying that we should have let the humans take Kar'shan?” “I'm saying we should have finished the job ourselves.”

Although this venture would very much be about Gul Rillek and his goals, I don't really see him as the protagonist so much as he is the prime mover, much more G-Man than Freeman. Rillek is a wealthy Palaven-based.... I guess you could call him a combination industrialist, crime boss, and political lobbyist. He has some very... “interesting” ideas about aliens.

Rillek is a hard-line Assimilationist. According to him, most of the galaxy, from asari to krogan, are culturally degenerate, and only being subsumed into a massive new Turian Hierarchy can “fix” them. The fact that the current Hierarchy is (in his view) a watered-down puppet state of the Council is just one more obstacle to overcome, really just one more alien race to absorb or exterminate. When confronted with the Systems Alliance, he didn't see the same Borg-like nightmare the Council saw- since his idea of the ideal Hierarchy already was a Borg-like nightmare, in the humans he found a race of mechanized, militarized, red-blooded turians. Hence the idea of using the humans to accomplish his goals . They're culturally almost identical to turians, they're militarily powerful, and most importantly they have yet to suffer the “creeping sclerosis of the Citadel” that turned the real turians into simpering errand boys for the asari. Rillek is utterly convinced that when the smoke clears and the tanks have rolled through the Presidium, humans won't dominate or be dominated by turians so much as the two sides will simply merge... and then assimilate or exterminate everyone else.

This being RR, Rillek is very much Not Nice. He's not just willing to justify the means with an end- it's that the end itself is a bit suspect. He thinks the genophage was a swell idea, and wants to apply it to other species like the Vorcha that he considers to possess a warped idea of population dynamics. He considers a war with the Terminus systems “infinitely preferable to the alternative”. And for whatever reason, he really, really likes labor camps. I'd best characterize his alignment as “angry good”, with good being relative to the RR norm.

I'm not sure how powerful Gul Rillek is right now, but it's probably not very. He certainly doesn't expect governments to change within his own lifetime, and his ideas are just too weird to net him any popular support should he move around openly. He doesn't really have an army of his own- just mercs and random thugs, and I don't think that if push came to shove he could even really hire that many of those. But at the same time, I think he's passed the point where he's just building up resources, and is now actively influencing the galactic political scene. Which probably means Councillor Sparatus should just go ahead and make peace with his ancestors as quickly as possible.

Rillek is able to bring his essentially subversive politics in line with his extreme (even for a turian) nationistic and authoritarian nature only through his truly collossal hubris. Gul Rillek is firmly convinced that he is simply smarter than the Primarch, smarter than the Council, and that Only He knows what's best for the turian people and the rest of the galaxy.

In personal terms, I have surprisingly little to say about the guy. He's not particularly dynamic or charming, nor is he particularly abrasive. He's a biotic, although a very very bad one (going to have to check up on whether a turian biotic could ever be allowed to completely squander his abilities and receive no training whatsoever), has no combat skills to speak of, and has only a layman's understanding of scientific and technical fields (hence his employment of Ren).

He looks... well, he looks like a turian, although early on I decided that the right side of his face is scarred, charred, or maybe just outright synthetic. To hear Rillek tell it (he does so in person rarely, but the information is floating around somewhere), he was born into a mildly wealthy family, served as an interpreter in the turian military, and participated in a series of raids against batarian slaver operations. One such raid went disastrously wrong, and after taking a grenade at close range Gul Rillek was forced to play dead as he watched his surviving squadmates dragged off to slavery, all of which sparked his conviction that the galaxy needs to be reformed. All of the official records support that (with the possible exception of the Shadow Broker's), but after the “interpreter” part none of it's true. He worked in an office far from the Terminus, got his face mangled in some unfortunate accident (Rillek mentions a female soldier he was close to in the heroic version, and she is a real person- maybe he was injured while doing something stupid to try to impress her?!), and came into his politics entirely without direct outside influence. But politics demands a narrative, and so he produced one...

Other than that, Gul Rillek has a few quirks, mostly relating to his truly massive hubris. He never verbalizes “opinions” or “beliefs”- things simply are, because Gul Rillek is never wrong. He avoids any sort of romantic 'shipping: due to his “disfigurement”, he thinks anyone interested in him is such because of his power and influence, and does not feel comfortable participating in something that one-sided (read, the fact that he thinks he's in charge of everything makes him unable to perceive someone as freely giving consent). One way I thought of to really show the core characterization was having him, once he'd met them, actively try to maneuver Shepard and Garrus Vakarian into a 'ship, because that really gets to the core of who Gul Rillek is- supremely convinced he's right, and absolutely incapable of comprehending that some things aren't his business to mind.

Letting his titanic sense of infallibility be his undoing seems almost... cliché. I want to make him smart enough to adapt and paranoid enough to include redundancies in case he's tactically wrong, and I don't really think his hubris extends to day-to-day decision making. Rillek must be able to admit temporary defeats, listen to his advisers, accurately evaluate his opponents, and react competently to failures. I think that sometimes he proposes ideas that he deliberately knows to be bad, just to weed out the yes-men in his inner circle. He's read the handbook, basically.

My brother told me Moffat would be writing both this series and series 9. Is it true?

So far, no one has e-mailed me yet. I double-checked the spelling of the e-mail address, so I doubt that e-mails got lost in the ether (please correct me if I am wrong).

I know that Bakugan is not that big a fandom, but Pokémon is huge, and Bakugan is not that hard to get into. If needs be, I can even just point you in the direction of the specific episodes that have the background information that I am working off of.

Again, with Outhra's disappearance, I am really in need of a good beta! Any help (though please keep what I need in mind) would be greatly appreciated!

Please and thank you,
SoH176

Hello, and welcome to the PPC.

Hello and welcome to the PPC! Have you been checking back recently? You've received quite a few newbie gifts--and have been asked a common question, i.e., what your fandoms are.

As for my gift to you:
*rummages through bag of holding*
Here, have a snowglobe with a replica of your favorite fictional locale inside!

Welcome to the party! Have a flying monkey.

Hi, have some fudge!

Do you have any special fandoms? (Books, games, TV shows ....)

-Points to the oft-repeated trio of Constitution, Wiki and Original Series-
-Also points to the 'for newbies' FAQ-
-Offers Earl Grey tea-
-Offers scones, too, and jam-
-salutes-
-Signed, Corporal Des

Have a carafe of continuous caffeine! I promise it doesn't break any major laws of physics... much....

Hello and welcome!

I give to you a lined Infinite Notebook, complete with urple covers and wilver binding.

-Aila

I just finished watching Monsters Inc., so you get some popcorn and a replica of Little Mikey! It's a teddy bear with one eye, five legs, antennae, and cute little fangs.

Good to hear that you've read the original series. What are your fandoms? Who's your favorite author (real world or PPC)?

Here's a pair of Joo Janta 200 Super-Chromatic Peril Sensitive Sunglasses. They work by turning completely dark at the first sign of danger, thus preventing you from seeing anything that might alarm you.

Aww man! Sorry I totally missed this! Happy belated birthday- have a fluffy walrus as an apology! :3

*offers cake* Happy 15th!

Happy birthday to you.

Since you seem to like dangerous things, here's a Delibird!

By now, you should know the standard warning, but to give you the CliffNotes version: 80% chance of KABOOM!

Enjoy!

By the way, has anyone seen Edge of Tomorrow?

'cuz it's good. Real good.


THE EMPEROR PROTECTS!

Many happy returns and all that.
-Offers Earl Grey, scones and jam-

*Blows bubbles at Hedgehog.*

*showers 99 with packing peanuts*

Huh. I thought you were older than me, when you're actually a couple months younger. Interesting-odd.

-Aila

You just made a college student feel old!

In all semiseriousness, please, take this 20-character alphanumeric password. I'm sure it'll unlock... SOMETHING...

You get a Sonic Generations T-shirt! (I'm sure they exist.)

Everyone should write crossover Doctor Who fic. I have! (shameless self-plug). hS beta'd it, actually.

And my scariest episodes are Blink and Midnight, whereas my favourite episodes are a tie between Remembrance of the Daleks (Seven and Aaaaaace), The Doctor's Wife (utter perfection), and the Eighth Doctor audio The Chimes of Midnight, because it totally counts and is utterly wonderful.

One more thing to add to your list:
-Whenever you hear someone mention "going to the doctor" or "the doctor says" or etc, you immediately assume they mean the Doctor.

-Aila

One of my favorite episodes is "Don't Blink"

And I like Leela better than Rose even though I can barely remember her.

A Victorian Detective is saying that the man was murdered by a midget. Leela argues the benefits of the underhand strike because it's easier to get past the ribcage.

I think I have about...oh, 1/16 of those? Just guessing. (I do ship pretty hard, but not necessarily in the show.) Except in my case, rambling is less of a habit I developed and more of a thing I already do. Ha-ha.

1. I know both of them: Nike makes sportswear and shoes while Patagonia makes outdoors gear.
   
   2. I don't buy Nike stuff. I do own a Patagonia coat, though.
   
   3. Waterproof/coldproof shoes. Cool.
   
   4. Personally, I don't think it's the best use of silicon ever. All of these things can be calculated if you take a map, time your walk, and do some math. It makes me think of this Calvin and Hobbes strip.
   
   5. First of its kind, so yeah.
   
   6. Rich kids with lots and lots of money to burn.
   
   7. Link is broken.
   
   I hope this helps.

1. How aware of you of the two brands Patagonia and Nike?
   Never heard the first. I do have some stuff from Nike - a jacket, and I gave a baseball cap to my father as a birthday gift last year.
   2. What products do you primarily buy from these two companies, and how do you use them? I rarely buy stuff from Nike - I usually manage to find comparable or better clothes at a more reasonable price.
   3. How do you feel about Patagonia and Nike coming together to work on a technologically enhanced shoe? Well, depends on what you mean by technologically advanced. It is something useful? or is it just an expensive "toy" with little use other than showing off?
   4. How do you feel about a technology enhanced hiking shoe that tracks the distance, speed, and elevation of your hike?
   Might be useful if you're someone who takes hiking as a very serious hobby and wants to collect data about it, or as a "black box" of sorts for paramedic and military personnel.
   5. Do you think the Pioneer is a fitting name for this shoe? Not sure, but I can't think about anything better.
   6. What type of person do you think would buy this product? Aside from those mentioned in 4, I'd say geeky or showoff people. I can't see it as something that would have a wide appeal.
   7. What do you think of this logo for the shoe?
   http://snowythesanefangirl.deviantart.com/art/PatagoniaNike-464598615?ga_submit_new=10%253A1404145089 Can't see it.
   8. Do you have any other thoughts or questions on this? None.

I know Nike does shoes, but the only thing I have from Patagonia is a blue velour hoodie. (It's a pretty good one.)
3. More power to them
4. That sounds like it could be super awesome
5. Yes, definitely
6. Really serious outdoor people (i.e., not me) or possibly park rangers
7. The link's broken.
8. What class are you taking that requires you to post surveys on message boards? Marketing?

1) Ummm... Nike exists? And makes shoes? And was named after the Greek goddess of victory, aka alternate personality!Athena? I know nothing about Patagonia.

2) No clue. Sorry.

3) I guess that would be cool?

4) That actually sounds like a really awesome idea. It'd be expensive, though.

5) Huh. Come to think of it, yes.

6) Avid hikers, backpackers, rich people, and people who are watching their weight.

7) The link does not exist.

-Aila

1. Nike makes shoes and workout clothes with their logo on it. Never heard of Patagonia.
   
   2. I tend to buy New Balance when I can't find cheap shoes that I like.
   
   3. I'm for it if they come up with something that's comfortable enough to justify the cost.
   
   4. That's kinda cool, but I'd rather have something less likely to get ruined by a puddle.
   
   5. Sounds good except that it makes me think of the television.
   
   6. Serious hikers.
   
   7. I thought about a different one and prefer your idea. May need some tweaks in the negative space.

1) I know that Patagonia is some kind of clothing or outerware store? Their founder or somebody might have come to my university to do a talk on sustainable business that looked really boring. I don't think I own anything by them.
Nike makes shoes, mostly athletic shoes, and possibly some other sports gear as well. I understand that their shoes can be quite expensive. I'm pretty sure it went Diety->(Shoes, Missiles), not Diety->Missiles->Shoes or Diety->Shoes->Missiles.

2) I don't think I own anything by either of these companies. My walk-down-to-the-store shoes are New Balance, I could just as easily wear cheap Nikes. I don't know what brand my boots are.

3) Why do we need this? I mean, it would be great if they could make a shoe with some kind of gel sole or something that was cheaper/comfier/whatever, but I have a distinct feeling this will be another one of those nebulous "high-performance" products that don't do anything actually useful.

4) Well that's certainly not what I was expecting. I for one would have to actually LEAVE MY HOUSE to use something like that, but I'm all for more integrated technology in day-to-day activities. It's one step closer to powered armor, so knock yourselves out!

5) I suppose, although for once I'd like to see a non-Euro/American-centered naming convention for these things. No strong feeling one way or another.

6) I could see this (assuming they can get a working prototype) having widespread usefulness among the expected fitness buffs, midlife crisis dads, and hunters, but also among various emergency-response/law-enforcement/military groups, biologists/ecologists, and wilderness-industrial people like loggers and surveyors.

7) Sorry, but this one doesn't sell it for me. It's literally just the two company logos superimposed overtop of one another. I think the Patagonia people might also complain about their contruibution being smaller than Nike's...

8) Do you know how, technically, this thing works? Is it GPS? Accelerometric? How reliable is it?

Even though bribery isn't necessary, pictures are nice anyway.
1. I know Nike makes shoes, but isn't Patagonia a part of Argentina or something?
2. I had Nike shoes for some time. I used them the same boring way you use shoes: I wore them on my feet and walked/ran/what-have-you.
3. -Shrugs- meh?
4. It's pointless, unless you're some health freak.
5. I suck at names, but... no? How about iShoe?
6. People who can't leave their smartphones alone for more than two minutes.
7. Err... generic?
8. Do take what I'm saying with a grain of salt.