May 2013 Archive, part a

Do I still count as a newbie? It's nice being able to claim the Shield of Ignorance as an excuse.
Incidentally, you guys are, well, not, you know, awesome or anything...but I likes you!
Oh, well, I'm off. Things to do, shinies to be found!

Graphs graphs graphs graphs graphs and tables!

And I'm sort of active, I'm just...observing. As in, reading everything but then going back to the 'too-shy-to-post' state again for some reason. I don't know why. It makes no sense.

Anyways, nice job!

This is fun. Thanks! ^_^

Phobos and I are putting our heads together now. Not for any particular reason, of course. But our powers combined could hypothetically be a force to be reckoned with. Perhaps we'll know more by Thursday next.

~Neshomeh

I made the top ten? Sweet!
This is great, Huinesoron!

That was informative. It's pretty cool to see that kind of stuff. I would never have time to put all that together!

I can always look forward to randomness like this happening. Ah, I missed this side of the PPC.

But yeah, it seems crazy how the newbies are all taking high turnover rates. Just out of curiosity, Huinesoron: did you take the IRC into account? 'Cause I find that it's been getting a little more lively since how it was from when I first came back.

Which shows because I'm sat here giggling like an idiot at having my name mentioned in a post. I feel so shiny!

But it's interesting to see all this data-type stuff, hehe.

You can definitely see my sporadic returns to the Board quite clearly there.

I guessed the newbie turnover rate - I always get kind of sad when I see a newbie thread, because I know everyone's going to jump on and welcome them and then odds are, they're never going to come back. Congrats to those who remained active. Especially DawnFire and World-Jumper, who stuck with it long enough to get Permission!

I'm amused by the way I'm in the top ten for three months in a row, top 5 for two of those, and one of the two out of five Permission requests to be granted in January. I feel special.

However, this does show me how I need to get a life...

But I'll leave it alone for now, because people might flip out if I went ahead and guessed the details about it

I apparently haven't fallen off the map as much as I'd thought. Not that I intend to fall off the map. I've just been very busy.

Also, I recognize some of the symbols in the non-existent first graph. I can only speculate as to what import that graph might have... if it existed. Which it doesn't.

Thanks for this, hS. This can be very useful information and I don't know if anyone else could have pulled it together.

-Phobos

...I'm in the top five posters every single month since I joined. That's...pretty cool, actually.

Thanks for making this! It's really interesting, and I was actually wondering how many Boarders we had, so now I have an approximate answer to work with.

(169 posts in April. Wow. I didn't realize I'd been so active!)

Are you going to do this every four months? Because that would be really cool. Alternatively, where did you find a stats page in the first place?

I suppose I'd better get to work on May...

~DF

What was the first graph for?

I like how you've organized everything. The data is clear and easy to understand. If anyone wanted to make some sort of academic paper based on your work, they could.

Glad to have you aBoard once more. Cookie? Take a dozen. What frustrated you about your mission?

I don't know you, becasue I'm rather new, but here, have a-- hmmmm... *looks around* Ooh, here, take this Writer's Unblock! (You put it on like sunblock and it helps you write while also blocking not-particularly-harmful octarine light!) *throws Unblock*

-Aila

Welcome back to the board. Good to see you!

It's completely okay... at least I hope it is, due to school I'm in and out all the time. :)

Help yourself to anything on the table of delicious baked goods!

What does your current mission draft look like? I might not be able to help right away, because I have a beta reading and a possible co-write that I will want to do first, but it wouldn't hurt to post it, I think.

Have fun with this one, Hermione of Vulcan! Be as mean as you want! :)


Name: Raven Crowe (Raven for short).

Race: Reman.

Gender: Female (obviously).

Select the ones that you are familiar with/have written for: Star Trek: 2009, Star Trek: The Original Series, Star Trek: The Next Generation x, Star Trek: Voyager x.

Favorite of the above: The Next Generation.

Lust Object: Shinzon.

Favorite Character: Shinzon. I mean come on, he's sooo badass!

Favorite Pairing: Shinzon/Raven.

Favorite Pairing of canon characters (skip if same as above): Erm... Picard/Borg Queen?

Select one: Command, Security, Science x, Engineering, Non-Starfleet.

Do you have an OC? Yes, that's who I'm writing about right now... you didn't think I'd tell you my real name, did you?
If so, describe their appearance and personality: Slim, Reman female, cunning, the best tactician ever... Oh, and yes she is psychic.

Do you know what a Mary Sue/Gary Stu is? Yes.

If so, have you written one? Of course not! Well, I don't think so...

Do you write slash? Definitely not.

If so, for whom? See previous answer.


A/N: Raven Crowe is quite intelligent and not easily spooked. She relishes a good intellectual challenge and is guilty of Hermione Granger tendencies. Things that might dissuade other people are likely to make her more determined, because she sees it as a challenge. Without sufficient challenge provided, she will quickly get bored of the matter at hand and resort to scheming. She takes pride in her good SpAG (but is at OFAS thanks to bad characterisation and Mary Sue-writing). She is rather taken with the idea of Badass!Picard - while she admits to fancying Shinzon, she'd probably go for Locutus of Borg as well, given the chance.
I can imagine she will find being psychic is not as fun or easy to control as she might hope. Oh, and feel free to feed her to the Borg if you want... it would probably serve her right (although it still might not stop her scheming - an intellectual challenge is an intellectual challenge, after all, and having implants is cool/badass).

I like it. I dooooo.

I've been looking forward to this for ages!

I see Her Majesty has made an appearance, heeheehee.

I also found a couple of errors, notably:

1. Troi's line ending in '... is that clear!' could probably do with a question mark.

2. Alli's line 'and then I came out here' has a random newline in the middle.

3. Nora's line '"We can lust after who we want" is missing a newline... well at least we know where it went! :D

4. The line below, Alli seems to be 'scowling at ths Borg hallways' instead of 'the'.

5. You seems to be alternating a little between 'the Borg Queen' and 'The Borg Queen'; best to pick one or the other (I dread to think what minis of her would be like). Also, I do not think the Borg Queen would use contractions (like 'what's').

Apart from that, very good indeed - nice and long, too. I particularly enjoyed the repeated worry every time they came across the Borg corridors. Oh, and the students seem to have a quandry... they need to pass all classes to pass the course, but who wants to be considered worthy of assimilation? I feel sorry for poor Troi, as well.

I would also be happy to beta for you in future, should you wish.

I'm no expert on Star Trek, but this is hilarious and enjoyable even though it's like the original series for me (I'll say wikipedia and my Tolkien read friends are my life savers and leave it at that). Hehe! I love it.

Since it's actually vaguely on topic here...

I just replayed both Portal and Portal 2 on the PC - out of order, actually, because I'm a terrible person - but only in single-player. Does anyone have Portal 2 and want to help me take a stab at the co-op campaign? I don't promise to be very good (but I try!).

hS

Was to see if anyone wanted to watch the Let's Play-type stuff I linked to.

Age of Empires 3, Age of Mythology, Mount and Blade Warband, Sims 3 and some expansions, Total War, from Rome to Empire. I tried Shogun 2 but the scope is too small.

I'll do Sims, Zoo Tycoon, or an active wii game if I'm really bored. But I tend to lean towards reading and writing, fanfiction or original, in my spare time. Or choreographing. Playing guitar.....you get the idea.

I've been reading and watching too many Let's Plays as it is!
*sighs* Ah well. More can't hurt, I guess.

I play some games, but I'm very, very picky, so really only Zelda and Okami (which is amazing and you much go look it up immediately) and, if my brother gets his way, a little bit of Portal or Portal 2. But I mostly read.

-Aila

By necessity, really. But that does look like an interesting game. (I initially thought it was the syndicated game for the Mega Mind movie... yeah, that was wrong.)

Let me see what's not been taken and I can see what I can pick up later today, I've meant to get back into all this. I've shown my e-mail, so you can contact me there. Sorry this is so abrupt, I'm in a hurry! Thanks for bringing this back!

If you still need it, of course. And I'll try and contribute to OFU²'s article, too.

hS

Sure, I think I can take a crack at it. Why the hell not, y'know? Can I post a review, potentially?

OMG yay Lily you're amazing~!

...becasue as I do not have Permission, I cannot help, and thus do not want spoilers. Good day!

-Aila

I'd like to contribute to the briefing, the review section, and the gossip section. If anyone wants to add their stuff to the briefing, they are more than welcome to because I am a little short on creativity now, don't mind me.

I might not have as much time as last issue to work on this. It's exam crunch time over here, so...yep.

I'd love to be a part of this, or help somehow.

I'm not sure that I'd be able to do anything for any of the articles, but I might be able to contribute some bits for the Feedback or Gossip pages.

I do have an idea for another page that might fit in, so I thought I'd share it - a Want Ads page, so that agents could put up things like 'Looking to sell one Amulet of Sueness (recovered from Harry Potter Sue). Drop by RC1984 for more details' or 'Will swap one full set of Dwarven battle armour for one Potion of Growth', etc.

Of course, the Editors would probably have to filter out all of the 'Will swap current partner for less annoying/insane one' type messages.

By the way, I haven't actually got around to commenting on the first issue yet, but I thought it was fantastic.

Writing for the new Multiverse Monitor is fun, but if I don't get through my backlog pile, it's going to fall on me someday.

*looks warily at the very umbalanced pile of unwritten fanfiction chapters and missions*

Sounds fun! I dunno what I could do, though. - I don't feel strongly about any of the open spots.


Oh, though! If for the next issue the scenery could be from Nanoha - the planet Mid-Childa, the Infinite Library, the Saint's Cradle, the Asura - I could write that.

(I'm also willing to contribute to the Spock article, but that's another story)

I'd just also like to possibly add in something about the Reader, due to very spoilery reasons that we discussed in an email...oh, wait, I can just do that as Feedback! Never mind. I may contribute some Gossip as well, because that sounds hilarious. Other than that, I'm willing to contribute to/write the three articles that you've mentioned me in connection with (ie, contribute to OFU-Squared and the Blackout Cleanup, and write the Sue Lord Defeat article--I'm assuming you meant the JB one, right? ((...I just realized...he has John Barrowman's initials... o.O That is a wonderful coincidence, unless you planned that, in which case, well done!)).) I may also give you an Advert, if I happen to think of one.

This sounds like so much fun...

Also, my email, which you should already have, but I'll repeat here for ease of finding: dawnfire360@gmail.com

~DF

Permission might not be required for Feedback since the signature is usually a pseudonym that can be used by anyone. As long as you aren't referring to Agents that don't exist yet or something, it's all fine.

Permission is required for Gossip, even untrue gossip, because the Agents submit their initials with that.

I wish I was kidding, but I'm not.

This is a rather annoying Hetalia fic that ended up very Sueish at the end, which is why I'm bringing it here for your viewing...pleasure. It features 'Black America', or Addy, America's wife. She's able to shut up the other nations by yelling—apparently, she's a force to be reckoned with—even though her SPaG is so bad that it looked like America was the one who was yelling (complete with random gender change). It's short, but it's bad. Read at your own risk.

As to "Lady America" (listed as Avengers, but it's really )...I'm not actually sure, and I'd like a second opinion (also open to third, fourth, etc). I clicked on it expecting to be confronting a Sue of epic Sueness; instead, I met Marty Barnes, who was actually pretty likable, beyond the occasional historical/military issues, the SPaG, and some tense shifts left over from rewrites. Considering the author was 14 years old for most of the story (apparently she celebrated her birthday somewhere in the middle), it's...actually, that doesn't really have much bearing on anything, I just thought I'd mention it. While it is a Steve/OC romance, the romance part was progressing quite naturally and realistically, apart from the occasional (although surprisingly not painful) use of a cliched plot device. There is extremely little Peggy bashing (although she does come across as slightly OOC to me), and most characters are kept impressively IC. Even the language isn't jarringly modern; the worst anachronism I can think of is when Marty puts on capris.

So, it was progressing quite nicely, for the most part. I was all prepared for Bucky to fall off the train, and for Steve to have someone to mourn with; I was even wincing at the thought of reading it, because the author had managed to make me care about Marty, and about fic!Steve, and I was sure that it was going to be sad, and that I might even sniffle a bit. But then...

She saved him. Out of the blue, she managed to save him, when Captain America failed under the same circumstances. And without any explanation of she succeeded where Steve failed canonically. And from there it's just been going downhill.

On the other hand, I really do like pre-chapter 17 Marty (although I'm a bit curious as to whether her nickname is at all reasonable for the era). Honestly, I'd like to recruit her. But on the other hand, it's quite possible that I'm blinded by the fact that she reminds me a lot of Bucky, and that Bucky's one of my favorite characters, so...second opinion, please?

I wrote down an analysis/charge list thing. You can find it here, along with a link to the actual fic. It's quite short—just a page and a quarter (my analysis, not the fic). I think I've made it so you can comment on the doc, if you like, but here on the Board also works :) Basically...help?

And, as a 'bonus' of sorts, have a Twilight badfic! It's ridiculously short, and, in short, utterly ridiculous. It seems to be some sort of AU. I don't even know. This is it, if you're curious.

I have some other potential badfic (it came up when I searched "Lady America" on FFN) but I haven't gone through it all yet. I may make another post later...

~DawnFire

Everyone is stunningly out of character. Most characters have, you know, personalities.
By the way, how does one draw a 'long, cold breath?' Like, opposed to what? A long, warm breath?

This Sue claims to have a mother who is a nurse in the navy. I have heard of army nurses, but were there really navy nurses? My knowledge history has gotten somewhat rusty.

Get to, hon.

One paragraph in I spot contrived stupidity, world war two fail, annoying use of names, and questions as to whether the author speaks english as a first language due to the grammaticisms that I've noticed.

I don't know Star Trek that well, so I wouldn't know anything about canon.

A. That's horrible pacing.
B. Was that one minute in Virginia, the next in Washington D.C?
C. What the heck just happened?
D. RUN ONS! RUN ONS GALORE!

What's bothering me the most is that the Sue keeps thinking the Star Trek characters are Nazis. There is so much wrong with that.

1. She doesn't know what the Nazi uniform looks like? Didn't they have newsreels and stuff?

2. The characters don't know what Nazis are. I mean seriously, these are intelligent Starfleet officers. Surely they studied Earth History in school. And would be appalled at being compared to Nazis.

Oh, and all of a sudden Picard's a WWII buff. He likes history, sure, but WWII was never mentioned as something he liked. He's more of an archeologist, ancient civilizations and whatnot.

And who's the random guy at the beginning?

And the SPaG. Dr. Crusher "shock her head". *giggles*

That's Elemental Goddess levels of bad.

Hint: If it's not pixel art, I don't want to see the pixels. But wow. The amount of wat in this... Also, is it just me or does her computer (laptop I assume) try to commit suicide?

After all, it's the badfic that keeps giving. ;)

That "Animation" is truly horrific...

Connecting to what SeaTurtle said, we tend to post most reported badfics to the Unclaimed Badfic page, so before posting something to the Board, make sure you check that it isn't there or on the Claimed Badfic or Killed Badfic pages, because if it's already there, we've already seen it.

Enthusiasm is always welcome, though, so I'm not saying to stop looking for things to post. Just check first, and if the fic's not on any of those pages, and it's really awful, feel free to post it in whatever badfic thread is currently active.

...don't mean to be rude or anything, but the latest badfic thread is just below this one.

Blood Raining Night is currently claimed by Neshomeh too...

Glad you decided to join! I wasn't sure if you'd end up liking the PPC, or just thinking I was crazy, so I was quite relieved (and excited) when you said it was awesome and proceeded to dissect a badfic with me :)

Welcome to the Board! Here, have some Swiss Bleepolate and a tribble (I have a few too many of them from when Hermione started throwing them around at my Permission Granted party), as well as a bottled Fallen Angel!Mary Sue's Grace (no idea what it'll do, but it could power some interesting experiments, don't you think? Be careful, though, it's rather pink and sparkly, which never bodes well).

For anyone reading this who isn't the Engineer (I'm trying to find you a nickname, I'm not really sure what to go with yet), I (and you?) have him to thank for introducing me to Doctor Who (and therefore Torchwood as well) and the Avengers. (To be honest, he kept referencing DW, and I started watching it to find out what he was talking about. I ended up liking it, so I continued watching.) So...thanks, Time. (No, I like 'Engineer' better. 'Time' makes you sound like an anthropomorphic representation of time, which would be very interesting in HQ--and on missions, presumably in ESAS--but means it's not so great as a nickname).

So, again, welcome to the Board :) Glad to have you here.

~DawnFire

And here is a sprocket wrench, half a cosmic brownie, (I still wouldn't eat at the cafeteria if I were you,) seven green wires and a red one, and a pair of stainless-steel sporks.

Welcome aboard! I've just started watching Star Trek TOS (I'm on episode 10 of season one, so no spoilers!) and of course everyone's always happy to have another Sherlockian. I've been spending my morning looking at the fan theories on how he survived... so how do you think he survived?

Welcome, welcome! Sorry I'm a bit late ^^;

Looks like we share a few fandoms, though I don't think I can come near a level approaching expertise. But I like Doctor Who, TNG, Big Bang Theory, Torchwood and Quantum Leap too! (And I love cooking, if I can find hungry people that is!)

For your welcome gift I'm going to imitate Herr Wozzeck today, and give you some Chameleon Circuit.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RuJ5erEcoeI
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IipsV2HTrn8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G9ydSMj0Hk8
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PxR3iJG8">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PxR_3iJG8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5OLYQJYHZQo

Hi, newbie! Welcome to the board! Hope you stick around a while.

You said you like cooking? How about some bleepolate! Because you will see badfic.....a lot of badfic....

Hello there! It seems that the one Trek fandom that I like most is the one fandom that you don't follow! No matter, Picard is a good captain as well! Other than Trek, it seems that we don't share any fandoms. Have you ever seen Stargate: Atlantis?

Either way, your newbie gift!
*rummages through bag of holding*
Here, have a Glite-painted replica of the Enterprise-D!

Greetings, new friend! For your present, a free ride through the Quantum Leap Accelerator!

(Finally, another QL fan!)

That will be extremely useful for you if you stick around.

Also, hi! Have a cookie!

Welcome to the Board! Have some of my hydrophobic water to commemorate the event. Tastes like improbability!

Anyway, welcome to the Board! You sound like you'll fit right in... here, have a free* Tiny Talking Sheldon keyring! And for only £1.99* extra, I'll throw in a matching Tiny Talking Spock keyring!

*postage and packaging not included

HimochiIsAwesome is not responsible for any insanity caused by Tiny Talking Sheldon, nor for any mistakes with the Tiny Talking Spock, as she has never actually seen anything from the continuum outside of Big Bang Theory episodes.
Not to be placed in or near to fire. Do not use while operating heavy machinery. Do not use while pregnant. Keep away from pets or children. Choking hazard. May contain peanuts. Side effects may include nausea, diarrhoea, migraines, insomnia or unexplained gender bending. Store in a cool, dry area out of direct sunlight.

Hmmm. Since you like DW (Eleventh Doctor's the best, right? Right? Right? Right!), that makes you automatically a wonderful person. (River Song's awesome, isn't she? Right? Right? Riiiiight?)We're happy to have you a-Board! Here, have a shiny thing.

(That's DW, Elementary, and Sherlock btw)

Your username is the most awesome thing ever. Hello, welcome, have some lemming repellent! You'll need it.

Well well well, a Sci-Fi fan I see. Quite the range of canons in the genra too, I'm impressed. Have you played Half-Life or Portal by any chance?

Before I continue much further, I have to ask you some questions:
1. Have you read the Original Series?
2. Have you read the constitution?
3. Do you intend to apply for permission to write in this universe after a month or more on the board? (If you do, I suggest the Department of Sufficiently Advanced Technology, considering your talents.)
4. How did you find us? (Personal curiosity, that's all)
5. Do you like bananas?

Now that's out of the way, I can give you your gift. Have a single dilithium crystal to use as you wish.

Welcome!

I hope you'll hang around much longer than I usually do, and if you don't, then at least come back before people forget you, unlike what I do.

As a gift, I'll give you a garlic garland, so you can use it for cooking or chasing away rats. Or pretty much anything with stronger sense of smell, if need arises.

Feel free to ask questions. You'll need to.

Welcome to the PPC! We love newbies here, so take off your shoes, leave your sanity at the door, and come right on in!

As a welcome gift, have some music by Pierre Boulez: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BqpNZPOkQ1M

Hi! I'm quite the newbie too, but everyone's so nice here, so sometimes things like that are quite forgotten. It doesn't seem like we share any fandoms. At all.

Now, for a gift... Here, have this bag of shadows so you can lurk unseen when you're looking for things!

-Aila

Enjoy the discussions, provide your opinions, and read interesting stuffs that PPC has to offer.

I offer you a virtual Kepang horse for you to dance with. Don't dance too energetically though, you may get possessed by spirits, if you don't sprain your ankles first.

You are not the first to have these questions. I believe you'll find all three answers here:

- What to Include in a Permission Request

- When should I ask for permission?

- What can I use for my writing sample?

~Neshomeh

Yoda: Part of a balanced lunch, I am!

Swans: *Is bricked.*

But that apple Yoda is so cute and creative, and those cookies are adorable, and those cupcakes look delicious. Hard to hate when there are baked goods.

...besides, most geeks like both anyway.

*blows the partyhorn*
OMNOMNOM! Goodies!
*pretends to be Jabba the Hutt eating some poor unfortunate creature*

You are wonderful. *gifts you with a miniature lightsaber*

~DF

It's so adorable! I have a group of friends who are Star Wars nuts, so I'd love to know where I could find how exactly they did it!

Greetings, newbie! I hope that you enjoy your time here with the PPC.

It seems that you misunderstood when Sevenswans asked you what your favorite fandoms are. In other words, what works are you a fan of? For example, my fandoms include Pokemon; Stargate Atlantis; Final Fantasy VII, VIII, X, XIII, and XIII-2; and Star Trek Voyager.

From the fanfics you listed, it seems that you are a fan of Naruto, Sonic, Phineas and Ferb, and MLP:FiM. Any others?

However, I've spent enough time talking; I haven't given you your newbie gift yet! So...*rummages through bag of holding*
Here, have a Ninjask and a Smoke Ball!

Have some Swiss Chocolate and some Bleepka. You'll need them both pretty soon.

Welcome to the PPC!

Here, have some Berio as a welcome gift: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VRxw_gsSqFk

It was either 'Basalt' or 'Shale', and honestly, igneous rock is probably better than mudstone at any rate.

Welcome to the PPC! Have a link to Club MST3k, just for the hell of it!

Nice to meet you! I'm DawnFire (and I seem to be welcoming newbies again, which is good; I kind of...missed about five. Or possibly more. I'm not sure. Anyway...)

Since no one else seems to have asked yet, here are some standard questions:

1. Have you read the Original Series?

2. Have you read the Constitution?

3. Do you plan on eventually getting Permission and writing agents?

4. Who's the friend who introduced you to the PPC? (ok, that's mostly curiosity...)

5. Most importantly, what are your thoughts on the color orange?

And for a Welcome gift I give you...a miniature lightsaber! I seem to be handing them out (in honor of May the 4th, which...was yesterday, but still). Also, my customary gift of Swiss Bleepolate: the high-grade chocolate provides a distraction while the bleeprin gets to work erasing the horrific details of whatever you've just read/seen. Plus, it tastes better. Also, since it seems you like Naruto, have a...bother, what've I got from that fandom...um, here! Box of ramen :) Some badfic had Naruto leave before he ate it, which ended up as a charge...but the ramen was, uh, confiscated anyway. Several boxes of it were confiscated, actually, but...the agents got tired of eating it fairly quickly, so...

Ok, looks like I'm babbling. Sorry about that. I have a cold, and it feels early to me (even though it's noon...go figure). Hope you enjoy being a Boarder!

~DF

The Wiki will teach you everything, so don't worry!

I hope you will hang around much longer than I usually do, and if you do not, then at least come back before people forget you, unlike what I do.

As a gift... Well... Uh... Ah, yes! Here, you can have some sweet spiderweb. It is very tasty! I am not responsible for any wolfman hair caught on it, though.

Feel free to ask questions.

TRUST ME YOU'LL NEED TO

Greetings, new friend! Have an unwritten novel!

Now, it does need to be said that around here, we like to use proper grammar—capital letters, correct spelling, and all that—even in less formal writing like posts to the Board. Try to keep that in mind as you type! Sometimes it helps to reread what you've written before you hit "Post."

Welcome to the Board! Have some of my hydrophobic water to commemorate the event. It commands while eating!

Hi! I'm a newbie too, don't worry about it. Oh, a gift!

*reaches into cloak-pockets and rummages around* Here, have two Infinite Notebooks, one lined and one unlined! They're special editions with urple covers and wilver binding!*

*Ailavyn Siniyash is not responisble for any damage occuring due to this gift. Product may be flammable and Sue-created colors are sure to be eye-burning.

-Aila

I'm Pauline. Would you like some bleepolate ice cream as a welcome to the board present?

Welcome to the PPC, where we will only bite you if we think it logical/funny. We are, none of us, completely sane. Cookie?

Here, have... well, I stole some cookies from further down the thread, and there's a mini-fork, and half a stapler, oooh, and I'll send you a couple tea bags. Sorry, no coffee here!

Now that I've finished being the first boarder to empty their pockets on the newbie, got any favorite fandoms?

Hiiiya! It's great to see you joined the PPC, bro!

(I consider this a test to see how many people actually scroll this far down...)

Sacrifice: A Story of the Sundering

Just because it's AU doesn't mean I can't write it...

hS

Well, you already know my opinion on OFUDisc, although it's probably worth repeating - I'm really enjoying the story, and looking forward to reading the rest of it and finding out where some of those plotlines are going.

As for the Trousers of Time, I thought it was a pretty cool piece, and I especially liked how excited the unnamed Floaters agent was at the thought that there would be news from the future of how great they were, only to be cut off by the Sunflower Official like that. I really like your portrayal of the SO here - he seems to have a touch of menace to him, as if he'd be willing to go to any lengths to stop the Department of Efficiency from coming about.

However, that timeline chart you produced is far too simple for my tastes :P

I'm tempted to write something up involving my agents getting caught up in a pre-Trousers Sundering - after all, it's a pretty common theme in stuff involving time travel/prophecies for the very actions taken to avoid some event actually setting them up.

Sadly, I haven't had a chance to read the OFUDisc story, yet, so I can't comment on that.

However, I did get to read End of the Beginning. Though short, it is quite interesting and kind of a refreshing take on the whole time-travel/future information thing. It is nice to see characters who, rather than being secretive with the information and trying to enact the necessary changes subtly, are upfront about what they are doing and why they are doing it. "We have information that X is going to happen if we do nothing. We are taking Y action to prevent it. End of story. Go about your business." The usual cloak and dagger approach just ends with no one being able to learn from the other timelines' mistakes because they don't know that mistakes were made.

So, yeah, I liked the story. Well done.

Also, I've been working on a future-AU for a little while now. So that chart you posted further down the thread is going to be outdated soon. Sorry about that.

-Phobos

I've opened it in a new tab, but what's the whole story behind it?

So this makes, let's see... three alternate timestreams now. Arthurverse, Twisted Skein, and the Shipverse world that Luxury came from.
Of course, there's also the AU PPCs like the Transcanonical Defence Authority based on steampunk and the version simply called called The Organization that was based on Magical Girl anime, but there are a lot of those and they have varying levels of connection to the prime multiverse, so they aren't as major. I may need to make some sort of chart for this.
What was MAXinsanity's point that made you write Trousers of Time? I'm curious.

When the main PPC universe split from the Twisted Skein multiverse, does it retain the ability to interact with it, or can the alternate multiverses only fully connect to other versions that share similar pasts to theirs?
Wait, if the latter is true, then perhaps the reason the Mirror Multiverse is difficult, but not impossible, to contact is because it shares a past with the PPC that is now utterly divorced from its own present and future. Hmmm. Plotbunnies breeding.

Oh, and I liked the new OFUDisc chapter, too! Well, chapters, because I hadn't read any new ones for a while for whatever reason.
I'm not entirely sure why the leader of a transdimensional organization would disguise herself as an fangirl to enter the University if she thought it was an elf-harming society, though. Maybe it's foreshadowing something.
For a short while in Chapter 9, I thought there would be the first sign of an invading force of some sort, but nope, just the one ship with a talking platypus. I might want to read the ISPACE story to get some context on that, but then again, it's funnier without any.

If you're still operating the Mini-Luggage Adoption Centre, would I be able to adopt Hexxx?

But I guess that's what happens when I show my concern for the future of the community as a whole.

Great to see new stuff coming out as always, though something seems missing in this sentence: "All the other members of the Board of Department Heads, for that matter – looked over at the empty ninth space in their circle."

Sorry for the nitpick, I /could/ just be tired, but it feels off somehow. Great work though!

(PS: Sorry again for disappearing off the face of the Earth. Hopefully I'll have good progress on certain things soon.)

A. Though I don't follow Diskworld (or even know what it is for that matter) the FF university was interesting. If a little confusing, but I'm pretty sure that might be fixed by actually knowing the fandom, though. /smiles and looks embarrassed)
B. Interesting point. /Has no idea what's going on, though she read the story/

Or any other science. Though admittedly, it's fun to try to describe them and their abilities in ways that make scientific sense; there are a couple of essays floating around the wiki that attempt the very same. Good reading.

But anyway, my point is that Sues ultimately get their power from terrible writing, and nothing is immune to that.

~Neshomeh

Here's the thing: Sues and the like are above psychology and basic rules. That's how I see them, at least, so if there was one specifically designed for either of those or if one was sufficiently reality-distorting, they'd be able to affect those creatures anyways.

Then again, I have a somewhat more serious perspective on things, so I'm not exactly the best to be answering this.

Play-by-post RPG's are basically internet web boards. The role players make different characters and different posts for different sections, and then just rally the story back and forth.

For example, in a play-by-post, you play a character. Writing the story is like a joint story- you write the story from your characters perspective and they write theirs, and you both decide about external plot/conflict. Does that make sense? It's kind of like doing a play through the internet, and writing it while you're doing it, except it's in story form, so you're examining inner thoughts as well.

At least, that's what my experience has been.

And most play-by-post RPs are indeed story-based. A former PPCer ran one a while back, at an academy for Mary Stus; basically, as said below, one person sets the scene - depending on the rules, this could be an empty scene, a prompt, done by a mod, or one of the characters doing something. Then somebody else posts a response on that thread, generally another character interacting somehow either with the scene or the original poster. And so on, and so on, adding characters (or not) until the scene is ended.

It can also be done by chatroom, which tends to be a much faster mode of play, but by the same sort of rules. The general thing to keep in mind is that the game is not run by points, but by story. It can be far better for your character to lose fights than win them, because what you want is character development, not high stats.

One person usually starts off with a topic or a prompt. S/he usually establishes rules, gives us context, etc. and then writes the first part of the story.

Another author can then jump in and, in a reply to the original post, write the continuation of the story. And then another person may jump in or the OP replies, and so on. It's very simple!

As an example, I'll link you to hS's Door to the Future RP, played in the above fashion.

Midsummer would be fantastic. I could definitely see that.... cast with LotR elves, maybe?
...Okay, so someone already suggested that. Still, it would work.

Oh my god this is brilliant!

I wonder of you could do anything with A Comedy of Errors, or Othello, or The Merchant of Venice, or...anything else by Shakespeare, really.

We should totally do Macbeth, set in Middle Earth or something.

Lily, this is perfect. Can you do Julius Caesar, too?

'Romeo and Sueliet'. Will never stop laughing.

Also, I completely support the theater group's name.

~DF

Discussions on the GDoc kind of implies that people have been invited already. I haven't even got an invitation mail.

And you should totally do Midsummer... somewhere. I don't know where.

Oh, maybe in Valinor? Or Angband, for a contrast? Or both? Or hmmm, maybe the forest could be Lothlórien... nah, that'd make too much sense.

-Aila

Erm.....that is to say Macbeth. I'm a theater girl at heart, so I hate saying it out loud- bad luck and all. The world is a stage!
Hm.....I have no idea where it would be set though. Pandora?

Oh my God, this was hilarious.

Do you have any more of these lying around? 'Cause that would be awesome, if there were.

My question is: is this really something that should be decided by committee? I think, and I could be wrong, but I think that most of what else is on that list got there because of actual popularity in usage. Like, if you go through LotR missions, you're going to find some "Flaming Denethor!"s and "Glaurung!"s in more than a few. They're not listed arbitrarily.

Heck, I'm not even sure "Thranduil on a moose!" deserves to be up there, and it was my idea. So... maybe see if people actually like this enough to use it in stories, then talk about putting it on the wiki?

~Neshomeh

P.S. If you're looking for good, serviceable Trekverse curses, why not Zoidberg Klingon? I know for a fact Trekkie agents have used Klingon expletives before.

I'm not a Trekkie, or even a TV/movie person in general, but, well, it sound fine and I don't see why not.

-Aila

Because, there are some characters who will always resort to 'Fudge' (Only I didn't say Fudge. I said it. The Queen Mother of all dirty words. The F dash dash dash word... Sorry guys, I just realized that my "A Christmas Story," paraphrase needs some work...) but there are other characters who will be more interesting. It also depends on the situation... somebody else mentioned cursing when you hit your thumb with a hammer, but usually all I get out in that case is an incoherent scream of rage, and it's when I'm angry at someone that the long profane speech comes out.

That's a yes vote for me.

However, I'm all for it. I agree we could use some Trek ones. Besides, Flaming Denethor suits Eagrus fine, but it doesn't really fit with Cyba.

I am not a good judge though. I have read through previous posts and see a point in everything said. It just is not something I would normally use, as it does not roll off the tongue. But then, there are many curses in my language that do not really roll of tongue either - the most common one includes listing all the family members you can think of (and the level of your anger is measured by the number of family members you can list).

I tend to see the longer curses as something you say when exasperated, like "oh Darwin on a Beagle, will the Sue stop singing?!" So it works for me.

Personally, I like my curses to roll off the tongue. Something you can just shout if you say, hit your thumb with a hammer. "Picard in a dune buggy" doesn't meet that criteria, for me. You'd probably have to think about it to use this one and if you have time to think before cursing, you probably didn't hit your thumb hard enough to warrant it.

-Phobos

I think it might have something to do with the fact that occasionally one's singing ability is considered a replacement for a character trait - basically instead of describing personality or whatever you get 'good singer!'. So singing ability with other character traits is well and good, but the annoyingness crops up when it's their only character trait.

It might also have something to do with descriptions. If someone has a voice like bells or a flute or whatever, it's not fun to hear that noise distorted into English words.

In that it's a combination between overall speshulness and Aura of Smooth.

The Aura of Smooth effect would probably manifest in the slavish devotion that canon characters suddenly manifest in the Sue after hearing her sing, which ties into the "singing is speshul" option very effectively.

In some cases, the psychic Sue-song can even cause possession in the canons, and I've found one badfic where a character was completely replaced after hearing it. or, if they aren't posessed, the singing tends to be chgaracterized by urple prose or Suvian traits in canons. Seeing someone shed a Single Tear at hearing the beautiful voice of Mary Sue is something that I have seen so many times, and it gets really annoying.

Some Sues tend to attach in-story powers to their singing as well for even more speshulness, usually "graceful" side effects like "curing evil" or "causing people to fall in love". The problem is, that's a mind-altering psychic power that most Agents need Glopsnerch or some sort of anti-psionics training to fend off properly. Sues and psionics are a bad combination, since Sues have little intelligence but a willpower strong enough to dominate an entire world.

It made me a little uncomfortable, because I take pride in my singing voice (I'm not great, but I can carry a tune without hurting people's ears) and don't like to see anyone mocked for being a good singer.

However, after giving it some thought, I've come to a few conclusions.

1. Sue-singing invariably sounds bad to anyone not affected by Aura of Smooth, a.k.a PPC agents. It's only said Aura of Smooth that makes the canons think it's pretty.

2. The Sue almost always uses it as some speshul trait, flaunting it and being complimented and fawned over by the canon characters for it.

I think that should be specified in missions, especially the first point. Otherwise, it comes across as "good singing = Suvian and annoying", which is not true.

Or at least their Aura makes people think she's good at it. To some agents she just sounds like an awful banshee.

Also she often sings songs inappropriate to the setting - one of the TOS Sues sang Nickelback and Alien Ant Farm songs in Moddle-earth, if I recall.

What's the SCP?

The SCP Foundation, especially in its early days, was plagued by Mary Sues masquerading as SCP objects. People wised up, listed some of the more flagrant ones in "decommissioned" and tried to let it go. Sues still come in every once in a while, though, messing with SCP material and using poor spelling, and eventually someone made SCP-732 for meta-humor.

See the former SCP-048 and the former SCP-809 for really bad former SCP Sues. Yeah. It used to be that bad.