Mar 2013 Archive, part b - PPC Posting Board

Latin and the PPC by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-11 00:42:00 UTC Link to this

I'll be brief. Cyba said this in another thread:

Cyba Zero
Actually, I think Latin's fairly popular around here.
Sat Mar 9, 2013 5:53am
86.130.168.86

I know a smattering, but I'd probably have to consult a dictionary and tables of endings for most of it, now, and I only ever got taught the present tense. I also remember somebody complimented me on using proper Latin endings once... Kitty Noodles, maybe?

Perhaps Latin and good writers are drawn to one another (perhaps because good writers are less likely to be afraid of Latin's copious amounts of grammar, or because being drilled in said grammar encourages good writing).

So now I'm curious, and instead of hijacking another thread, I'm asking my questions here:

How many of you have taken any Latin classes?

Why were you interested in Latin?

Has Latin helped you in your writing?

Answering my own questions by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-13 23:23:00 UTC Link to this

I believe that it is high time that I answer my own questions.

Not counting a brief stint in a Latin class in high school, I have spent one and a half years of Latin classes: I took Latin in college.

I was interested in Latin because I wanted to take Biblical languages, and I did not know at the time that Hofstra offered Greek classes (and yes, I did eventually take Greek as well).

As for how it affected my writing, I can't honestly say that it has done much. I do remember that it was in Latin class that I figured out the difference between "who" and "whom" ("who" is nominative, "whom" is oblique). However, as I mentioned in a reply to another Boarder on this thread, Latin has opened my eyes etymologically speaking: when I see a big word, I can tell when it came from Latin, and I can sometimes tell what the root word is. Now having taken Greek as well, one can only guess how often I see something that makes me think "this looks/sounds like it came from Latin/Greek"!

Oh, teh ironies. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-13 23:44:00 UTC Link to this

when I see a big word, I can tell when it came from Latin, and I can sometimes tell what the root word is.

I pretty much said that to Neshomeh in regards to translation of foreign languages. XD

More irony: Remember when I said that I write magical incantations as a combination of French, Latin and Greek? Who'd have thunk it that two of those three - maybe even all three! - happen to be your forte?

Re: Oh, teh ironies. by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-14 04:48:00 UTC Link to this

Yep, I am pretty good with all three. Of course, I am nowhere near fluent in Latin and Greek (who actually speaks Latin or Koine Greek?), but put a dictionary by my side for the words I don't know, and I can understand almost anything I read in those languages.

Uses of a dead language by stripey_cat on 2013-03-13 21:54:00 UTC Link to this

I had a very good Latin teacher at school, and went on to read Classics at Oxford (including compulsory Greek, yuck).

As for what I learned that's transferrable to writing English prose... Unlike modern languages, you're still taught the formal grammar and composition; I was able to use that framework to better understand English grammar and syntax. It's very important too to realise that languages change over time, and that rules that are correct in one context or register may be incorrect in another. I found the diachronic view of a thousand years and more very helpful in gaining that perspective. Finally, it was absolutely vital to realise that primers and style-guides are, at best, only providing guidelines: all the best authors regularly break the "rules", and learning how and when to do so successfully makes your writing so much more natural and flowing, and often more expressive. If you stick religiously to only the simple, straightforward constructions in your primer, you'll end up writing like a stilted primary-school teacher (or student!) regardless of the context.

No classes for me, but-- by Neshomeh on 2013-03-11 16:52:00 UTC Link to this

I have been exposed to Latin in various ways, including choir singing, science classes (scientific terms also involve lots of Greek), and linguistics classes, not to mention looking up the etymology of words on my own. I think knowing where your language comes from is immensely helpful for writers. For me, it gives me an appreciation of the nuances of the words, and helps me choose them more carefully. It also helps in guessing the meaning of unfamiliar words when I see them for the first time.

~Neshomeh

It's also handy for translation. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-11 16:56:00 UTC Link to this

Especially if you don't happen to speak the language of the country you find yourself in, but recognize its Latin roots.

Too bad I didn't think about this when I was in France and all my education went right out the window...

Indeed. by Neshomeh on 2013-03-11 17:03:00 UTC Link to this

It definitely helped in my Spanish class. Yay cognates! Sadly, I only had a year of Spanish, and I never got to the point where I could hear and speak it easily. Reading and writing I could do, though, and I still remember the grammar well enough to tell when Google Translate isn't quite getting the idea.

~Neshomeh, who is occasionally forced to rely on Google Translate for her job.

Re: Indeed. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-11 17:09:00 UTC Link to this

Same with me - I've had to do Spanish most of my life, but only have two consecutive years of French under my belt, and remember very little about either unless I'm writing it or seeing it written.

Of course, I could always fake it - and watch as my own back end gets curled around my face by the force of the kick from the angry native speakers, but hey.

Oh, Latin... by Sergio Turbo. on 2013-03-11 12:34:00 UTC Link to this

I studied it in high school, but only because I had to. I don't remember much of it, though, and I don't think it's helping much for my writing (aside being able to instantly recognize Gratuitous Latin and the fake one used to make up HP spells and such)

Ah, Gratuitous Latin... by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-11 16:54:00 UTC Link to this

When done correctly, it can be loads of fun.

When done poorly, it can still be loads of fun to mock incessantly.

And when done in an ominous chant, it's scary as crap. (Looking at you, Sephi-wephi-woth. Oh, I am a dead man.)

(Also, I'm going to have to make "sperry" a thing now - my phone seems to enjoy typing it.)

True. by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-11 21:03:00 UTC Link to this

Keiki Kobayashi, the composer of Ace Combat's music, is a master of this.

Ace Combat 4's "Megalith" (which is basically an arranged version of Agnus Dei, a church song!) and Ace Combat 5's "Razgriz Theme" are absolutely AWESOME.

Somebody put Agnus Dei in a video game? by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-11 21:15:00 UTC Link to this

That's one of the most somber Latin chants I've ever had to sing, how's it work in a video game?

Well... Here's how it's arranged. by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-11 21:27:00 UTC Link to this

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nZ6ABV_Q9qU

That level was EPIC.

Requiem by Desdendelle on 2013-03-12 20:08:00 UTC Link to this

Pieces from the requiem seem rather popular with video game music composer if you ask me. Off the top of my head, I can name two pieces that use the Lacrimosa: This piece from Advent Rising and Haven's theme from Heroes of Might and Magic V.

Ah, Sephiroth by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-11 18:59:00 UTC Link to this

Ah yes, OWA. Not one of Uematsu's greatest lyrical works, that. The FF7 One Winged Angel is just snatching lines from the Carmina Burana wholesale; no consideration of case.

But the Final Fantasy series has produced at least one song with good Latin: check out Born Anew from FFXIII, whose Latin is perfect with the exception of one line.

Okay, so that was cool. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-11 21:13:00 UTC Link to this

If I'm being honest, of course, my favorite themes from that game are mostly the regular battle theme, Snow's theme, the Eidolon battle theme, and the challenge boss theme, but that was still cool nonetheless.

(Seriously - Desperate Struggle is so catchy.)

I know bits of Latin from church. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-11 09:34:00 UTC Link to this

Born Roman Catholic, see.

Outside of that, I just abuse translators when I need the Latin help.

As for how it helps me, I typically use it in combination with French or Greek if I can pull it off as a language of incantation for magic, when I use vocal incantations as triggers in stories.

Like:

Feignotia - Fire with prefix in French (Feu), suffix in Greek (fotia), and middle in Latin (ignis).

Or, I use Latin on its own for things like arc words.

Such as:

Quando homo fecit apparatus, homo ædificavit deus. - Arc words from a sci-fi story in production; "When man made machine, man built god."

So, you know, little things.

Some concrit, if you don't mind... by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-11 19:28:00 UTC Link to this

Unfortunately, online translators can only do so much with Latin. Latin has a case system, so it's not enough to find the translations for the nouns in your sentences; you have to decline them into the proper cases depending on their place in the sentence. As far as your arc sentence, the words "apparatus" and "deus," being objects of their verbs, should be in the accusative case:

Quando homo apparatum fecit, homo deum aedificavit.

Also, you might consider "machina" instead of "apparatus" for "machine." (i.e., Quando homo machinam fecit....)

I thought that looked wrong... by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-11 21:09:00 UTC Link to this

Glad you pointed that out, thanks a million.

Sola lingua bona est lingua mortua! by Khaosity on 2013-03-11 06:48:00 UTC Link to this

Hope that was correct for "the only good language is a dead language" :-) I actually took Latin for five years, but since my last lesson was about six years ago, not all that much has stuck. What did stick is enough to understand and create spells for Harry Potter, though. Makes me cringe when I see stuff like "animagus stoppero" in a fanfic. Adding "io", "ero" or other such bastardizations does NOT make it Latin! I cannot stress this enough! Rant over :-)

You are correct. (nm) by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-13 23:24:00 UTC Link to this

On Latin by Karen on 2013-03-11 05:41:00 UTC Link to this

Five years of Latin in middle and high school, and I've intermittently kept up the study in the three years since. I would say that Latin has actually helped me write better, because it got me thinking outside the boundaries of English and let me better understand large words.

Boundaries? by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-11 06:45:00 UTC Link to this

Could you please clarify what you mean by saying that Latin got you thinking outside the boundaries of English?

To answer your questions: by World-Jumper on 2013-03-11 04:51:00 UTC Link to this
1. Never took any latin classes in my life
  
  2. Only interested because of the Heros of Olympus and camp Jupiter.
  
  3. Seeing as I never had latin, I can't say it helped my writing.

Re: To answer your questions: by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-11 04:56:00 UTC Link to this

If your interest in the classical languages is due to the heroes of Olympus, then wouldn't you be more interested in Greek than in Latin. Then again, Greek is, in certain ways, more complex than Latin. (I can say that from experience, having taken both languages.)

The Heroes of Olympus... by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-14 22:17:00 UTC Link to this

...is the spinoff series of Percy Jackson and the Olympians, which featured Greek demigods. In the spinoff, Greek and Roman demigods team up. So yeah...

D'oh! by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-11 04:56:00 UTC Link to this

Obviously, that first sentence should have ended in a question mark.

Er. Well. by Lily Winterwood on 2013-03-11 04:37:00 UTC Link to this

I haven't taken a single Latin class (not offered at my school), but I have friends who have. I have taken four years of French, though, so I understand what to do with gendered nouns and stuff.

My grasp of Latin only takes me to coming up with Mary Sue classification names for my Sue Report, really, although I've attempted Potterverse spells once or twice as well.

Re: Er. Well. by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-11 04:54:00 UTC Link to this

Incroyable; tu as assisté des classes de français pour quatre ans! Moi aussi: deux ans dans « junior high », et deux ans au lycée. Et j’ai beaucoup d’opportunités pour pratiquer le français. Le français est une belle langue, non?

But enough French. As for Latin, I took some Latin classes in college, and I truly appreciate the etymological doors that it opens--which, I think, ties into your attempted lexical feats in taxonomy and thaumaturgy.

FranÃ§ais est belle, oui... by darklordaakmal on 2013-03-11 09:49:00 UTC Link to this

mais je n'ai pas des opportunités pour utiliser-t-il. Je ne comprends pas pourquoi l'Occident aiment la langue Latin. Anglais est déjà très difficile a apprendre. Pourquoi vous n'avons pas apprendre Ancien Anglais? Elle existait encore, oui?

In Malaysia, there is no Latin Language classes offered, and Classical Malay are still close enough to Modern Malay, so there are only chapters in the syllabus, not an entire class devoted to it. If people wish to be extremely cultured, They'll learn Queen's English, or Arabic.

Lagipun, kami amat sukar untuk menguasai Bahasa Inggeris walaupun ia diajar dari Tahun 1 hingga Tahun Pertama Universiti. Kebanyakan orang yang menggunakan Bahasa Inggeris dalam kehidupan sehari-hari akan lebih menggunakan bahasa pasar Inggeris daripada bahasa Inggeris yang betul.

Well, this thread may yet turn into a multilingual thread. I hope I didn't mangle French Language just now....

Francese, malaysiano... Cos'ha l'italiano che non va? by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-11 21:33:00 UTC Link to this

Seriamente, non riesco a capire che cosa ci sia di così speciale nella lingua francese... L'italiano è anche più semplice da pronunciare!

Yeas, the resident Italian Boarder just had to write something in his native language too.

Penutur Bahasa Itali. by darklordaakmal on 2013-03-12 03:17:00 UTC Link to this

Ia juga wujud di sini? Sungguh luas jangkauan kumpulan siber PPC ini!

Do you Italians learn Latin too? Being were Roman Empire once was, I gues you may learn it. How different it is from Latin, anyway?

Some high schools here teach Latin. by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-12 12:31:00 UTC Link to this

And, believe me, they aren't that similar. Learning Latin is a pain even for us.

Native-language bandwagon? Not really. by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-12 00:17:00 UTC Link to this

Moun yo ki te ekri nan franse pa-t konnen franse tankou premyè lang yo. Si nou pa konte moun ki pale anglè yo, ou se sèl moun ki te ekri nan premyè lang li.

But enough from the resident Haitian; this post was about Latin, not the Romance languages!

As for your question, I think that more people take French than Italian simply because more schools offer French than do Italian. Besides, English has snatched a LOT of words from French: faux pas, nom de plume, nom de guerre...need I go on?

Oops... by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-15 00:32:00 UTC Link to this

To clarify, I meant this post in response to Sergio. I did not notice at the time that darklordaakmal had written something in his language as well. (Google Translate says Malay. Is that right, or is it Indonesian?)

Yes, it's Malay. (nm) by darklordaakmal on 2013-03-17 01:54:00 UTC Link to this

Quite a good reason for French loan-words. by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-12 05:42:00 UTC Link to this

Once upon a time, French was spoken by the English royalty. Thanks to the massive cultural and scientific boost generated by the Enlightenment, it became the language of the nobles and scientists. The cultural osmosis must have occurred during that time period...

Vous parlez créole, monsieur/madame? Misère, mon cerveau me dit que je suis capable de lire votre texte, j'entends les sons, mais je ne comprends rien!

Creole and French by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-13 00:10:00 UTC Link to this

Premièrement, je suis male (lis encore: sonofheaven176). Au sujet du créole, oui, je le parle.

C’est bien pour toi que ton cerveau te dit que tu es capable de lire le texte : le créole est basé sur le français, et beaucoup des mots viennent du français. De plus, tu peux entendre les sons parce que l’orthographie créole est phonétique.

Afin de vous permettre comprendre, permets-moi à traduire le créole en français : « Ceux qui ont écrit en français n’ont pas connu le français comme leur première langue. Si nous ne comptons pas ceux qui parlent anglais, tu est la seule personne qui a écrit dans sa première langue. »

TrÃ¨s intÃ©ressant! by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-13 05:05:00 UTC Link to this

Il me semblait que vous étiez en train de dire quelque chose à propos des anglophones. C'est fascinant comment le créole a évolué séparément du français...

*Se tient la tête entre ses mains* Ouais, j'aurais dû m'en douter que "son" indiquait bien quelque chose. Pardon.

PardonnÃ©. by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-13 23:25:00 UTC Link to this

Nous tous faisons des erreurs!

Mangling by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-11 19:12:00 UTC Link to this

You did not completely mangle the French--I could understand what you were trying to say--but your French is off.
"l'utiliser," not "utiliser-t-il" (Object pronouns go before the verb.)
"aime," not "aiment" ("Occident" is a singular noun, so you need a singular verb.)
"à apprendre" (note the accent), not "a apprendre" (Spelling error)
"n'avez pas appris", not "n'avons pas apprendre" (Two conjugation errors)
"L'Angalis Ancien", not "Ancien Anglais" (Adjectives go after nouns in French.)

And as for your questions themselves; it's mostly cultural. Rome was the dominant power over much of Europe, and Latin has a big influence over many European languages. So it only makes sense that people would be enamored with Latin, even if only to give things more of an "ancient" feel.

As for Old English, it is not at all similar to Modern English. There is actually a TV Tropes page about the evolution of English, if you're interested.

No Subject by Outhra on 2013-03-11 04:26:00 UTC Link to this

Hello everybody! I discovered the PPC the better part of a year ago, but I never actually posted on the Board until now.
For the first few months, I just read a few of the series without even knowing this place existed, but after I found out, I was reluctant to get involved for a long time because, well, I got nervous and kept putting it off. But no longer!
Oh, crap, I've spent half the post space rambling again. I've got to cut down on that.)
My fandoms include Discworld, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Bionicle, Adventure Time, Doctor Who(I've not watched much of the classic series, unfortunately, but I'm working on that), Homestuck, Star Trek, assorted Nintendo games, and plenty more that I'll more likely get to when I haven't already gone on for so long about everything else.

Hi hello and greetings! by Mister Shoebox on 2013-03-13 22:58:00 UTC Link to this

Hi and welcome!

Hello! by World-Jumper on 2013-03-12 18:43:00 UTC Link to this

AH, another brony! Sweet! You are currently 20% cooler then most other newbies. Here, as a gift, I give onto thee one statuette of your favorite character from Friendship is Magic (I have expanded my nanobot work crews past favorite pony now! Huzza!) with some aspect of their personality enchanted on it. For all of our sakes, I hope it's not [MESSAGE REDACTED].

(an alternate gift would have been miniature Luggage, but I think even a miniaturized version of the Luggage would cause havoc amongst HQ)

Oh, excellent. by Outhra on 2013-03-12 19:20:00 UTC Link to this

Statue Twilight Sparkle is doing an excellent job at keeping my other new gifts organized!
As an added bonus, she's keeping Cadamr sequestered until I can return her to her original author. (Cadamr growls) Now, Cadamr, I'm sure that Caddy-shack will be around soon to pick you up. You should have known better than to go after Tribble-eunuch like that. It's scared half to death! (Tribble-eunuch whimpers) There, there, Tribble-eunuch. Go play with the airhorn.

PLAAT! PLAAT! PLAAT!
Maybe play with something else.

Hey! by Lynne Lloyd on 2013-03-11 22:45:00 UTC Link to this

Welcome! I've been a bit busy as of late, but never too busy to say hi to newcomers! Lots and lots of fandoms, hooray! Have an urple wig! It'll look great with all your clothes! And maybe some yummy brownies too, because Sue-hair isn't the best gift.

Hey. by Ivan the Not-so-Terrible on 2013-03-11 20:04:00 UTC Link to this

Welcome to the Board! Have a bottle of Bleeprin, and pray you don't need it.
Also, do you know the term for a Discworld fan?

Ooh, another Whofan and Brony/Pegasis by Silken Dawn on 2013-03-11 19:07:00 UTC Link to this

Hey there! It's always great to have more Dr. Who and My Little Pony fans aboard. And actually, I've been thinking about watching Adventure Time. What do you like about it?
Anyway, please have this unbelievably adorable Fluffy Wambler. See you around the Board!

Wambler-keeping advice and Adventure Time by Outhra on 2013-03-12 16:15:00 UTC Link to this

Are Wamblers territorial? Or carnivorous? It's starting to eye my new tribble-eunuch in a way that's saying I'll need to keep them apart.

If you're going to watch Adventure Time, I'm not sure where I should tell you to begin. The first season is where all of the characters started off, and it sets a great tone for the crazy awesome land that they live in, but it's around Season 2 that it really started to develop. One of the show's strongest points is its characters, and a lot of Season One is testing the waters. When it hits, it's incredible. When it doesn't, we get bits like the Ricardio the Heart Guy episode that are just sort of confusing. (Though I'll be the first to say that his return in Season Four was epic.)
The show itself is one of the rare programs that has a great sense of humor but doesn't turn around and call attention to it; it's just part of their world, and it shows up everywhere. The background for the land of Ooo and the more enigmatic characters like Marceline is revealed little by little, through episodes that you wouldn't even realize were linked until after the fact, because info-dumping wouldn't be much fun at all, would it? (Take notes, practically every other show. They're right with that idea.) There's great dialogue, massive amounts of creativity, and constant subversion of the expected that makes the show enormously exciting and interesting to watch, and it's the first show in a long time that got me genuinely excited to see returning minor characters.

... Ahem.
That turned into fan-gushing really quickly, but there's just so much that I like about it!
Writing this made me want to watch Mortal Folly/Mortal Recoil again. I'll be back in half an hour.

The Care and Keeping of Fluffy Wamblers by Silken Dawn on 2013-03-12 20:36:00 UTC Link to this

Fluffy Wamblers are not remotely territorial or aggressive in any way. They're just adorable. They're tiny and humanoid with fingerless/toeless limbs and fluffy white fur. They're incredibly low-maintenance, since they don't seem to eat anything. Yours probably just wants to make friends with your, er, augmented tribble.
Anyway, I'll have to check out Adventure Time soon!

All right, that's good to know. by Outhra on 2013-03-12 23:06:00 UTC Link to this

I wouldn't want two of my newbie gift-pets at each others'... I was going to say throats, but tribbles definitely do not have throats, and from the pictures I found, the Wambler just has lots of pudge.
... at each others' vital anatomical structures. That works, though it doesn't exactly roll off one's tongue.

A bit of advice for watching Adventure Time online: there's not a lot of it on Youtube, due to copyright bots, and most people will only have a single season at most posted on their sites. It's best to have the episodes that you want to watch rounded up beforehand.
I should be able to link you to some places that I found if you tell me how to make an external link from the Board. I was going to attach one to this post, but I can't get any of the usual methods to work here.

Hey-o. by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-11 18:34:00 UTC Link to this

Welcome to the Board! Have some of my world-famous hydrophobic water to commemorate the event. Shines like a white-point star!

Hello there! by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-11 18:01:00 UTC Link to this

Ooh, My Little Pony and Star Trek! Based on that, two questions:

1. Who is best pony? (and why?)

2. What is your favorite Star Trek series (and why?)

My answers are Twilight, because I identify with her nerdiness, and The Next Generation, because it has consistant episode quality, an intellectual captain, Q, and Data. I also like TOS and Voyager, though, and I've just started DS9.

Oh, and you need a newbie present! Have a tribble! (Don't worry, it's been spayed/neutered.)

Hmm... Best pony and Best Star Trek... by Outhra on 2013-03-12 15:12:00 UTC Link to this
1. My best pony would also be Twilight, partially because her social awkwardness and obsession over small problems relates to my own personality, and partially because out of all the ponies, she's the most interesting to watch in new situations. You mostly know how the others will react; Pinkie will produce bright colorful objects from nowhere, Rarity and Rainbow Dash will try to impress everyone, etc.(not that any of those are bad, mind you), but Twilight could do any of a half dozen things and still be perfectly in character. (Discord, due to being the essence of chaos, does this as well, but it's treated much differently in a contextual sense, and he's not really a pony, is he?)
  
  2. It depends on what mood I'm in. If I want over-the-top space antics, only TOS will do, but TNG is better in terms of overall character and episode quality, even if it does occasionally devote entire episodes to backstory. I've only ever seen two episodes of Voyager; one was really good, but the other was really bad. Either way, I don't have enough information to make a real opinion about it.

Yeah, Voyager's like that. by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-12 17:20:00 UTC Link to this

Some episodes are amazing, some episodes are horribly stupid. So you got a pretty accurate impression of the show. However, overall, the characters are interesting, the good episodes are REALLY good, and the fandom fills in the gaps where the series failed.

I never minded when TNG devoted entire episodes to backstory - it helped you get to know the characters more deeply than TOS. TOS basically only developed Kirk, Spock, and McCoy, while TNG developed all seven of the main cast and some recurring characters too, like Barclay and Ro. One of the strengths of Voyager is that it does the same. That's why those two are my favorite. Also, ~~Discord~~ Q appears on both. (Actually, it seems like DS9 might become another favorite, but I haven't seen enough yet.)

So, in order to prolong this Trek conversation, I have a few more questions:

1. Kirk or Picard? (and why?)

2. Who are your favorite characters?

As I have made clear my preference for TNG, obviously my answer to the first is Picard. Favorite characters are Spock, Data, and Q, as I have also made fairly clear.

I might want to watch more Voyager, then. by Outhra on 2013-03-12 19:08:00 UTC Link to this

I just have an instinctive dislike of info-dumping, and even though the backstory episodes help define the characters, which is always a good thing, spending a full episode to show a character's family and past life just makes a part of me wonder whether any of this new information is going to be brought up again. To each his or her own, I suppose.

1. Definitely Picard. For all of Kirk's shenanigans, he was never very good at things that didn't involve drop-kicking aliens or romancing characters-of-the-week. Picard was the much better captain both in terms of having an interesting and multi-talented character and actually being able to manage people. It makes me wonder how Kirk got promoted to Captain when he breaks up fights between aliens by reading the United States Preamble at them.(Okay, mentioning The Omega Glory is a low blow, but it makes for a good example.)

2. From TOS, McCoy. From TNG, Data. Seconds are Spock and Geordi, respectively.
Q gets an honorable mention, but doesn't get ranked, because I've never seen any of his episodes all the way through. I always catch them halfway in, so I don't know what he's doing there. Then again, from context it just seems like he shows up because he gets bored in the Continuum and likes pestering Picard and Sisko. I can appreciate that. Sisko is the sort of guy who would need to be pestered once in a while, and Picard's reactions to Q randomly showing up are hilarious.

Yep, that's exactly Q. by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-12 22:36:00 UTC Link to this

I mean, sometimes there's other motivations, but it all basically traces back to him being bored. "I'm bored, I guess I'll test humanity!" is probably his motivation in the pilot episode, and then Picard intrigues him and he stops by other times.

Yes, "The Omega Glory" is pretty much the worst episode of TOS. I was reading a recap of it somewhere which I think summed it up nicely (I'm paraphrasing here): "It's typical for Star Trek aliens to represent cultures in Earth history. This is usually done subtlely. But in "The Omega Glory", subtlety was set on fire and thrown off a cliff." I mean seriously, the implausibilities! I always had the idea that Kirk was promoted because he was disobeying orders left and right, so they sent him on a mission where they thought he'd die, but he managed to survive. He kept doing that until he got to captain. Then movies, where he became Admiral. Then - my gods, I've just explained all of TOS! The reason the Enterprise keeps getting in trouble is because Starfleet keeps trying to send Kirk into missions that will kill him for disobeying orders. Only problem is, he makes friends, and is intelligent enough in his own way to get out of tough situations! *revelation*

Ahem. Picard, on the other hand, just has bad luck. Starfleet loves him because he stays enough within the rules to keep them happy, but he's still sympathetic to viewers because he breaks rules for legitimate reasons. He's much more well-rounded - if he quit Starfleet he could become an archaeologist, a professor, a musician, a radio announcer (I kid, who needs radio when you have holodecks?). He's intellectual, and listens to his crew's opinions.

Or, to quote my sister, "The only thing Kirk has over Picard is hair."

I'm probably gushing/babbling, tell me to stop if you want me to. It's just seeing a Trekkie (or Trekker if you prefer) makes me want to talk Trek.

Talking Trek is fine by me. by Outhra on 2013-03-13 00:30:00 UTC Link to this

If I didn't, my responses wouldn't have been half so long.

Even Spock's Brain, the commonly accepted "really bad one" for the original Star Trek, wasn't as bad as The Omega Glory. Spock's Brain was actually fun to watch and pick apart, because even after you laughed at the first layer of plot holes, you realized that there was a second layer of nonsensical plot contrivances just beneath its surface. How did the people on Sigma Draconis even reproduce if each gender had no idea that the other existed? Spock's Brain logic. How did a dozen unmarked buttons on McCoy's remote control replicate Spock's entire cranial functions? Spock's Brain logic. It's like Sue logic, if Sue logic made you bust up laughing instead of wanting to smack yourself in the head.
Omega Glory, on the other hand, was just flat-out stupid. I read that it had originally been considered for the first episode of Star Trek to air on television. That would have been awful! Nobody would have watched the show because they would have been so disappointed, it would have had no fandom, and then no sarcastic fanwriters would coin the term "Mary Sue", and then the PPC would never exist! The crappy fanfictions would still be out there, but the PPC would just be... doing something else! The very idea repels! (dramatic gasp)

As for the next bit, I imagine that, by Season Three, Kirk's bosses had run out of extra-dangerous missions to send him to, and on a routine sweep for certain-death encounters, they saw that he'd gone to the planet from Day of the Dove with no backup to fight both Klingons and the Beta Entity, and he still didn't die. Exasperated, the Federation Council threw up their collective hands or equivalent and said "Screw it all. When he comes back, we'll promote him and give him an administrative job that we can legitimately fire him from.", which he proceeded to vacate so that he could fight off whale-loving space probes and Klingon Doc Brown.
I like this idea. Your revelation is a good revelation.

I've had a fanon going for a while that Picard lost his hair as a teenager, similar to what happened to Patrick Stewart, and one of his original motivations for succeeding at so many pursuits was to show up all of the other Starfleet cadets who teased him for being bald. It's slightly OOC for him, but it makes me smile nonetheless.

"Spock's Brain"Â… by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-14 02:13:00 UTC Link to this

I have a Star Trek calander with pictures from various episodes and fun facts on the bottom. There's a picture from "Spock's Brain", and the fun fact is, and I quote, "The plot of this third and final season premiere is described by some insiders as a backhanded "tribute" to network executives who'd cut the show's budget and moved it into an undesirable time slot." That explains the blatant stupidity.

"The Omega Glory"… Its bad logic is a whole different degree of stupid. Yes, every single planet has developed exactly like Earth. Suuure. *wipes Sar-Plasm off walls* That is a frightening thought - "The Omega Glory" would have killed the Star Trek franchise at birth, meaning that modern fandom wouldn't have been created the same way, meaning that PPC might not even exist! What a terrifying alternate universe!

Whale loving space probes…Best Trek movie ever. (Closely followed by First Contact and Wrath of Khan.)

Your fanon about Picard makes sense, because it is shown that he was a bit of an arrogant womanizer as a Starfleet cadet (Season 6, "Tapestry") so losing his hair could have caused him to try and regain his pride by being smarter than everyone else. And I forgot diplomat on my list of other jobs Picard could do. And ambassador. Yeah, Picard is epic.

Good to have you a-Board! by doctorlit on 2013-03-11 16:56:00 UTC Link to this

Greetings, new friend! Have a sprig of poison joke!

No subject? by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-11 09:38:00 UTC Link to this

But-but-but, teh newbies!

Ah well. Have a present from teh Specs:

An Omega Rod!

(This one comes special from one of my in production fantasy stories. Unlike its mechanical brother, which was used for mass destruction, this omega rod is meant for the sole purpose of healing and light.)

(Headdesks) by Outhra on 2013-03-11 13:20:00 UTC Link to this

Ugh, sorry about the default title, everybody.
I was planning on a Pseudo-Witty Title©, but it was too long for the title bar, I deleted it, and I forgot to replace it with another one. Having no edit button is something I will need to get used to.
My "This post is not as good as it could have been" guilt easily quintupled when I saw that. Well, at least I'll be able to find my intro thread more easily with the search option. There can't be that many mistakenly untitled threads, right? (hears the IO chuckle)
Oh, grob, what have I done?

Don't sweat it. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-11 13:25:00 UTC Link to this

You wouldn't believe the number of times I've forgotten to input my own username.

AnonymousSC has become a mini of myself.

That reminds me... by Outhra on 2013-03-11 14:38:00 UTC Link to this

What do I do to report errors in missions and have them corrected? I remember encountering a mini-Cadmar, Cadamr, in The Agents Who Cried Space Wolf. It doesn't look that good to see misspelled names in an organization that is supposed to frown on that sort of thing, and I... (Cadamr bites finger) AH! Sharp teeth! (shakes hand furiously)

There's always contacting the author. by Neshomeh on 2013-03-11 16:32:00 UTC Link to this

It's probably best to use their site, if it has a way to leave comments, or the author's e-mail address or wiki Talk page. Accompanying the correction with a full review would not go amiss, of course. {= ) If you can catch them in the IRC chat room, that would work, too (and is probably your best chance in Caddy's case). I'd only bring it up here as a last resort for older missions, and not at all if the author/site admin isn't active anymore. Reviewing new releases on the Board when they're posted is perfectly welcome, though.

And, speaking of welcome, hi! Glad to have you a-Board. ^_^

~Neshomeh

Hello there! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-11 08:55:00 UTC Link to this

Welcome to the PPC! I be KittyNoodles, and as a welcome gift I have placed a box of bleepnerds and one Odd Container in your inventory!

Odd Container
Item Level 1
Chance on Openng: Receive one spray of confetti or one huggle - your choice.
[This container is perfectly spherical and appears to be crafted from glite-painted wood. Its weight changes at odd intervals, and you can't shake the feeling that opening this container may prove detrimental to your health.]

...Ignore that last bit, the flavor text hates me...

Welcome. by MAXinsanity AKA 409 on 2013-03-11 06:29:00 UTC Link to this

Go annoy people with this airhorn or something, I don't know.

OMG, a newbie! Hi! by Khaosity on 2013-03-11 06:25:00 UTC Link to this

I'm not the newest one anymore! *does happy dance* As a welcome gift, you get some Bleep'n'ms and a wahooni carving of Ankh-Morpork. So far, we share the Discworld fandom, which is awesome. What are the fandoms you didn't mention?

Hi Newbie! by Karen on 2013-03-11 05:44:00 UTC Link to this

Would you like a cookie?

Also YAY ANOTHER HOMESTUCK FAN *glomps* I am your friend for life.

Welcome, newbie! by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-11 04:38:00 UTC Link to this

Welcome to the PPC Board! How did you run across the PPC in the first place?

Have you read the Original Series? (HIGHLY recommended reading for all newbies, as it is the base of this entire enterprise!)
Also, I suggest that you read the PPC Constitution. I am sure that you're at least familiar with the PPC Wiki page.

But enough Serious Business. As you probably know, it is customary for us Boarders to give "gifts" to newbies. So your gift is *rummaging through bag of holding* a Bleen replica of a Voyager uniform!

Thanks for the gifts, everybody! by Outhra on 2013-03-11 14:04:00 UTC Link to this

I've read the Original Series, as well as easily a dozen of the spin-offs, and they're awesome. I read a few OFUs, too, but I gave up on that bit since none of the ones I read were ever finished. It's too bad; I liked them, especially the Redwall one.
I went on the PPC wiki already, and I even made a few edits there. Of course, since I forgot to log in, one of the admins said "Who is this anonymous person editing the Minis page?", and removed some of my changes, which is another of those things that I feel silly about in retrospect.
I first found the PPC when browsing TvTropes. When I went to the page, I saw the link to the Original Series and started reading it. It was, to reiterate, awesome.
I have to warn you, though, I will not be nearly as adept at Tolkien canon as a lot of the rest of you are. I'll probably still be able to identify unreported badfics for it though, if I need to. Sue traits are universal, after all.

Don't worry by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-11 19:31:00 UTC Link to this

Not everyone here is a Tolkien fan, nor does a PPCer have to be. I haven't read much past the first book! However, as you said, Sue traits are universal: they're everywhere, not just in Tolkien.

The PPC Boarder Shipfic Fest 2013 by Data Junkie on 2013-03-11 08:37:00 UTC Link to this

Well, spring is once more in the air, for some of us at least, and I figured the timing couldn't be better, considering what's just twoish threads down from this.

That's right ladies, gentlemen, starfish, and everyone else! It's time for the annual Shipfest! For the newbies, and those of you who don't remember how it goes, a summary shamelessly stolen from the wiki:

"The PPC Boarder Shipfic Fest is one of the stranger activities that the PPC Board gets up to. It is pretty much exactly what it sounds like, but since newcomers will still probably be inclined to tilt their heads and go "WTF?" at the strangeness, a few words of explanation:
We at the PPC do not like to take ourselves too seriously. Therefore, to celebrate the coming of spring and the resurgence of fresh hormones in our young blood--or really just anytime someone feels like starting it--we hold an event in which anyone who wants to writes silly shipfic about various PPC Boarders. Those who do not wish to participate are respected and left out of it. Everyone else is subject to the shippy and often slashy whims of their fellows, with amusing results.

There are a couple of rules, of course:

The first, which has been stated but bears repeating, is that anyone who does not want to participate is left out of it.
Similarly, if someone is not around to give their assent or dissent, they are left out of it just in case.
Second, the rating should stay PG-13 or lower. This is meant to be silly and fun, not squicky.
Once somebody starts the shipfic thread, it is traditional to state your willingness to participate if you are willing, and then to call out potential pairings (or more-than-pairings), perhaps along with the grounds (if any) for the 'ship. If there is one in particular that strikes your fancy, write it! If someone writes a shipfic with you in it, it is then traditional to retaliate and write one about them.
Or you can just up and do whatever you want. *wink wink nudge nudge*"

One last note: Agents are not usually involved in the Shipfic Fest, though this is not a rule. It's just that there's a separate event for them. (Which, admittedly, is also due for a return sometime soonish, I think. Unless I already missed this year's Fanfic Land.)

With this, I hereby declare the PPC Boarder Shipfest of 2013 open game! Needless to say, I'm always available, and up for basically anything, so ship away.

Bronies: World-Jumper/KittyNoodles by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-16 16:14:00 UTC Link to this

AKA The Return of Dominatrix!Kitty

***

Kitty adjusted her dress. As a dominatrix, she had to modify her style to whatever person she was trying to seduce. Today, it was a brony. Kitty liked the show herself, so she had the materials for a costume. And who didn't love princess ponies? And a fan favorite too!

She sat down in her chair and draped a blanket over her head and wrapping it around her body just as someone knocked on the door. She ignored it, picking up a book and pretending to read.

The door opened, and she looked up. "Why, hello there," she said, a purring sound in her voice.

"Um, hi," World-Jumper said. "You must be Kitty."

"Yes," she said, suddenly realizing the purring wasn't quite right. "You're the brony. World-Jumper."

"Yes," he said, looking somewhat confused.

She rose from her chair and sashayed towards him, swaying her hips just enough to show under the blanket she kept clutched around her. She came to a stop an inch from his face.

"So," she whispered, leaning in and running a finger down his ear, "Who is best pony?"

"T-Twilight," he replied as her hand traced a line across his shoulder.

"Oh, Twilight," she said. "Wonderful pony." She let go of the blanket.

World-Jumper stepped back. "Not Twiacorn! I hate Twiacorn!"

Kitty reclosed the distance between them and raised her eyebrows, smiling seductively. "Then take off my wings."

"With pleasure," he said, and pulled. He tossed the wings on the ground triumphantly, then suddenly realized that he had removed more than the wings.

She wrapped her hands around his neck and he succumbed.

***

So sorry, you two. But what with Dominatrix!Kitty and the fact that you're both bronies, I had to do something.

A Dom. Dressed as a Pony. Pffffffthahahahahaha (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-17 16:46:00 UTC Link to this

You're just jelly 'cause I can pull it off. (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 19:43:00 UTC Link to this

Dominatrix Kitty dressed as Twilight? by World-Jumper on 2013-03-17 01:10:00 UTC Link to this

*Pomph*
(That my freinds is the sound of pegasus wings opening when they are... excited.)

In all seriousness though, wow, that was funny. And acurate too; I would rip the wings off a cosplayer who was dressed as Alicorn!Twilight if I was brave enough. Thain again, considering what happened with kitty here...

When I was reading it, when I read she was dressed as a princess, I honestly thought, "It's Molestia isn't it?" The reveal that it was Twiacorn made me laugh and sigh in relief. If you don't know who Molsstia is, well, look at the name and guess. It is part of the dark side of the fandom, and one I hope Marvin and Printworthy come across so they can kill that sorry character replacement.

Anyway, back on track here, well done. If I had been drinking anything, it would have sprayed all across my little tablet here. Thank goodness I was not.

(PS, for the record, best pony is either Twilight or Fluttershy, the two calmly fighting for the position. Not that it changes anything, just thought you should know.)

-chokes on tea yet again- by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-16 20:15:00 UTC Link to this

~~I need to stop drinking tea when I read these...~~

Very funny! Only why do people keep writing me as a dominatrix...? -head tilts-

Because you're the only person here I know well enough. (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-17 16:46:00 UTC Link to this

-whaps with a rolled-up magazine- by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 19:44:00 UTC Link to this

Affectionately, of course. But still. :P

*pats on the back* by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-17 09:06:00 UTC Link to this

Yeah, you really should. If you choke to death on tea, then we lose our catgirl dominatrix. We need such a character for the Shipfic Fest.

-headdesks- (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 19:43:00 UTC Link to this

Did I say something lame again? by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-17 21:45:00 UTC Link to this

'Cause, well... I kinda do that a lot IRL.

No, it wasn't lame. by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 22:42:00 UTC Link to this

It was equal parts hilarious and oh-god-that's-the-role-I-have-for-these-now. Hence the headdesk.

Then... by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-18 19:48:00 UTC Link to this

*throws ball of wool at KittyNoodles* Let's see if Kitty/Ball-of-wool works.

OMFGILOVEBALLSOFWOOL. by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-19 04:03:00 UTC Link to this

-spends a good hour playing with ball of wool-

I think it's the cat thing. by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-16 22:10:00 UTC Link to this

I'm not sure why, but there's something about cats that if women imitate them, it's considered attractive. I think it's the way they slink around, and act cold and aloof. Note how the other one had you scratching, and I had you purring.

Yep, it's the cat thing.

Reeeoow. -swipes- (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 03:58:00 UTC Link to this

Chhhhh! by Desdendelle on 2013-03-17 00:28:00 UTC Link to this

-Does an imitation of a hissing cat-
That reminds me that I sometimes scare people with that. It's fun.

Ahahahahaha, very nice! (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-16 16:29:00 UTC Link to this

Haha, thanks! (nm) by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-16 16:47:00 UTC Link to this

So I drank too much coffee just now and Boarder party. by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-16 08:53:00 UTC Link to this

Despite the fact that some participants are named, it is safe to assume that everyone who signed up is here and everyone who didn't is not, because that is exactly what is happening.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The Board was buzzing with news of the annual Shipfest. Already close to a dozen posts had been made showcasing various Boarder ships, and the participants were cackling at their pairings or reacting with oddly tsundere-like proclamations of 'B-BUT I WOULD NEVER'.

Everyone knew the truth, of course, but this was all in good fun. At least... it was, until several Boarders decided that they actually liked their pairings and wanted to see if they had any merit and real life.

This in mind, these Boarders - and by 'these
Boarders' I mean Riese, Phobos, Neshomeh, Huinesoron, Khaosity, HerrWozzeck, and hermione of vulcan - decided to get everybody together at a physical meeting place rather than just the Board and set things up in such a way that romance would be entirely inevitable.

So they picked a totally unimportant city in an equally unimportant country and invited everybody to the first-ever Meet Your Shipficcers PPC Fest. Some people - such as Silken Dawn and DawnFire - headed straight over, while others, like firemagic, took some poking and prodding before they decided they should probably attend.

With everyone gathered there at once, the hormone level went through the roof, into space, and eventually punched a heart-shaped hole through the moon, which probably had some really bad consequences for things like the Earth's tides and the moon's orbit. But nobody cared about that, because with so many hormones absolutely nobody was able to resist their fellow Boarders and eventually a very different party went down.

Coincidentally, none who attended were ever permitted to set foot in that particular city ever again. Everyone agreed it was totally worth it.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

I should not be allowed near my keyboard after drinking three cups of coffee in a row.

Teehee :-) by Khaosity on 2013-03-16 22:48:00 UTC Link to this

That...actually sounds like something I would do (getting us all together and receiving a ban from the town, that is). This is why I am not allowed to be bored :-D "Banned from Argo" also came to my mind! Let's hope no one ends up walking with their feet a yard apart ;-)

-spits tea everywhere- by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 03:59:00 UTC Link to this

Wh-WHAT. XD

What Data Junkie said about the reference... by Khaosity on 2013-03-17 23:22:00 UTC Link to this

As for why I'm not allowed to be bored? Well... there was the time I enacted the "Epiphany" scene from Sweeney Todd in the middle of town, then the time my friends and I played "subway tag" through the entirety of Nürnberg... There are plenty more examples! I wish I could take credit for the reenactment of the Silmarillion in art class, but that was a friend's "fault". It was still awesome though :-)

A reenactment of the Silmarillion? by Silken Dawn on 2013-03-21 01:42:00 UTC Link to this

How long did THAT take?

Wasn't finished by a long shot... by Khaosity on 2013-03-21 02:59:00 UTC Link to this

It ended when the teacher from next door came in (ours got called off and left us unsupervised, thinking that eleventh graders were old enough to know better) and asked us what the heck was going on, why was Andrea duct-taped to the wall by her wrist and was that smoke she smelled? By that time it had been going on for about 45 minutes... with a LOT of improv, as half the class had no idea what was happening. Also, it was out of order, cause we were already on Beren and Luthien and the... Dagor Bragollach, I believe. Yes, simultaneously. Yeah, Maedhros/Andrea got forgotten about... Oh, and Feanor (yours truly) was still alive, thwapping Morgoth with a pencil case. C'mon, I wanted my Silmarils/notebook back!

Awesome by DawnFire on 2013-03-23 15:24:00 UTC Link to this

Wish my grade had done that. Would've been fun. Not sure enough of us knew the Silmarillion, though.

...we definitely oculd have done Harry Potter. That would have been awesome, and everyone knew it. Pity we never actually did anything beyond quotes and discussions...

(Seriously, how do I get a TARDIS and come to your class to join in the reenactment? It sounds really, really fun.)

Also, smoke?

~DF

Boarding schools... by Khaosity on 2013-03-23 16:11:00 UTC Link to this

Where the people who would be "losers" at normal schools are suddenly the coolest! We'd already done Harry Potter to death. And PotC. Also, I did say half the class was clueless... Some of them were making paper airplanes, which they gave us willingly, because "never refuse a determined geek". And so the First Kinslaying failed to occur... We did burn them (the paper airplanes), though, hence the smoke (also, Dagor Bragollach=Battle of Sudden Flame). Honestly, I wish I could do that again! This time I wouldn't even have to be coerced. Yeah, friend of mine stole my notebook, declared "The Silmarils are mine!", I was having a bad day and tried to make him give it back, he refused, I shouted "Give it back or I swear I'll kill you!", some others swore they'd help, and the rest is history... Needless to say, my day was suddenly a lot better!

It's another Banned from Argo reference. by Data Junkie on 2013-03-17 22:42:00 UTC Link to this

"The Head Nurse disappeared awhile in the major Dope Bazaar,
Buying an odd green potion "guaranteed to cause Pon-Farr."
She came home with no uniform and an oddly cheerful heart,
And a painful way of walking-with her feet a yard apart."

Which is a lot funnier if you also know the verse about Spock.

"Our proper, cool First Officer was drugged with something green,
And hauled into an alley, where he suffered things obscene.
He sobered up in Sickbay and he's none the worse for wear,
Except he's somehow taught the bridge computer how to swear."

â™ª And we're banned from Argo, just for having a little (nm by Data Junkie on 2013-03-16 13:22:00 UTC Link to this

Well, damn. It cut off part of the lyric. by Data Junkie on 2013-03-16 13:34:00 UTC Link to this

Eh, I was just quoting the chorus from Banned from Argo, which I figure enough people know well enough to recognize anyway.

Hee~ (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-16 20:16:00 UTC Link to this

Bryn/Herr by firemagic on 2013-03-16 04:14:00 UTC Link to this

HerrWozzeck entered Bryn's room. "What did you want to see me for?" he asked.

Bryn nodded. "I need help with something. Something I heard that you're good at, that I can't do by myself."

"Sounds serious," Herr commented.

Bryn shrugged, handing him a few sheets of paper. Herr's eyebrows rose, but he decisively nodded. "Let's do this."

~~~~~~~~~

"Now we can go straight! Into the middle eight! A bridge that is too far for me!"

"I'll sing it in your face, while we both embrace!"

"And then, we'll change, the kee-eey!" They sang together, Bryn and Herr walking through the halls of the PPC, singing at the top of their lungs.

Oi, I pop off to write things, and I come back to this? by Lily Winterwood on 2013-03-15 06:22:00 UTC Link to this

I'm definitely in for this one. GO ON. DO YOUR WORST.

Chosen semi-randomly from the Latin thread: Khaosity/Sergio by Silken Dawn on 2013-03-14 03:07:00 UTC Link to this

Afternoon sunlight slanted down from the library's high windows. Only two remained inside at this hour, hunched over an enormous leather bound tome, united in their desire for learning.
"So you see," Khaosity explained, "it would really be 'dei ex machinae,' since you wanted to pluralize it."
Sergio Turbo nodded understandingly. He pointed to a word on the ancient Latin dictionary, but Khaosity reached at the same time, and their hands met over the well-worn pages. Two voices gasped; startled brown eyes looked into handsome and hot Italian ones.
For a moment, there was perfect silence. Then, Sergio finally found the courage to ask the question that had been burning in his mind for so long:
"Cogito ergo sum?"
Khaosity blushed furiously, but she matched his boldness. "E pluribus unum," she said, her voice like a caress.
Sergio gasped again. Could it be? "Post hoc, ergo propter hoc!" he declared. Now there could be no mistake- and no going back.
"Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet!!" Khaosity cried, and threw her arms around her study partner. Soon there was nothing but a flurry of passion and clothing discarded on the library floor. She conjugated his verbs, and he made sure ALL of her adjectives agreed.
__________________________________
Ha... I should write romance novels for people who want to hit themselves repeatedly with blunt objects.

Very funny! by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-15 02:27:00 UTC Link to this

At least my Latin post managed to do some good! Really put a smile on my face.

(Nit-pick: Check the posts mentioning the plural of Deus ex Machina again: you should have written dei ex machinis or dei ex machina.)

Lest anyone get any funny ideas of shipping me, I'm out!

*laughs so hard she cries* by Khaosity on 2013-03-14 20:44:00 UTC Link to this

This is awesome! Much better than my ficlet, in which Tray-Gnome is apparently an illithid/squirrel hybrid...or something o.O (there we see the necessity of engaging Mr. Brain before writing)

Nah by Silken Dawn on 2013-03-14 21:47:00 UTC Link to this

I liked your ficlet a ton. There's nothing like extremely thinly veiled innuendo! Plus it indirectly spawned an adorable mini, which I should probably claim.

Awww, thanks! by Khaosity on 2013-03-17 02:56:00 UTC Link to this

Sorry, just saw this! Yeah, you should go claim the nano-squirrel down there... Iss kyoot (probably).

I don't know about that... by DawnFire on 2013-03-14 17:16:00 UTC Link to this

...I was laughing pretty much the entire way through. No hitting myself with blunt objects.

*cringes away from the swarm of innuendo in the above*

(...it should probably be noted that my brain may or may not have been spending a little too much time in the company of such individuals as Capt. Jack Harkness, Tony Stark, and Clint Barton, and therefore cannot be held liable for its actions. I plead the fifth. Or the third. Which was the one about soldiers, again?)

*collars brain before it can make a (mildly) inappropriate remark*

~DawnFire

Is it bad that a shipfic version of me speaks Latin better? by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-14 17:03:00 UTC Link to this

'Cause, well... he does.

Fighting fire with fire: Firemagic/Plat by Riese and Kitty on 2013-03-14 01:39:00 UTC Link to this

“Right foot...red!”

Karrin bit her lower lip, and slowly shifted so her foot rested on the mandated dot. Unfortunately this put her in an... awkward position.

“Nnn~” Plat squirmed slightly. “Watch it there, you.”

“Well, it’s hard to watch much of anything with you around,” Karrin retorted with a cute little pout.

“Mmm. Not that I’m complaining, of course...” Plat made the shift to Left Hand Green slowly, taking great care to accidentally brush against her, which placed the pair in an even more awkward position than before. This had the interesting effect of making Karrin flush a very bright shade of pink.

“Tease.”

“Bite me, Murph.” Plat stuck his tongue out at her childishly.

Karrin leaned forward and left a gentle bite on Plat’s ear, causing him to fall forward out of surprise. “What the-”

“You did say to bite you.” Karrin smiled wickedly up at him. “Not my fault if you weren’t ready for it.”

“Well, now that we’re here,” Plat purred, “shall we go for another round?”

“I suppose so, if you’re so eager to lose again.” Karrin’s smile grew even more wicked. “How about this time we make things a bit more... interesting?”

“Interesting how?” Plat’s cheeks began to heat.

Karrin didn’t answer, as her hips were already moving by themselves, wriggling out of her pants.

And so they played a more interesting round. Or three.

_______________________________________

Sorry, Plat. You're just too much fun not to use in these!

Hey! by firemagic on 2013-03-14 21:45:00 UTC Link to this

I object to this baseless insinuation that I have any flexibility or fine motor control! I have been capable of tripping over flat ground in sneakers before, and the idea that I can play Twister is simply untrue!

firemagic, even I can play a good round of Twister by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-14 23:05:00 UTC Link to this

And I'm the idiot who took fourteen years to realize it isn't smart to run through a crowded basketball court.

I play a mean game of Twister myself. by Riese on 2013-03-15 00:23:00 UTC Link to this

But then, I did gymnastics for ages, so I dunno if that means anything.

It doesn't count if you're already gymnastic-y. (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-15 05:23:00 UTC Link to this

I would make a joke about reach and flexibility by Riese on 2013-03-15 21:05:00 UTC Link to this

But I'm not Turian. And it does so count. You just jealous.

I am not jealous of superhuman flexibility and shut up. by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-16 06:22:00 UTC Link to this

Pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbth.

Are too. (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-16 16:27:00 UTC Link to this

Shoosh. (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-16 20:18:00 UTC Link to this

Make me~ (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-17 16:50:00 UTC Link to this

NO TILDES. by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 19:45:00 UTC Link to this

THAT'S THE REASON WE NEEDED TO WRITE A REVENGE SHIP IN THE FIRST PLACE, YOU TWIT. XD

Twister just calls for this kind of situation. by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-14 17:37:00 UTC Link to this

Seriously, whoever created the game must've been planning that. There are so many possible embarassing, awkward or funny outcomes that I can't count them.

Hell, at a friend's birthday party she had the terrible idea to let her boyfriend call out the colors himself instead of using the roulette thingy when it was her turn... and she was wearing a skirt. Cue boyfriend deliberately choosing the colors in order to try to get a pantyshot.

He failed, but it was funny nevertheless.

Riese/Kitty by firemagic on 2013-03-14 00:58:00 UTC Link to this

(because my brain remembered that in the Boarder Shipfic Fest there are no dumb ideas and I had five minutes to kill)

~~~~~~~~
KittyNoodles barged into Riese's room as he continued playing EVE. "Riese!" she shouted. "What exactly are these supposed to be!?" In her fists she held handfuls of tildes.

Riese grinned. "Don't you know what a tilde represents?~" he asked.

Kitty blinked in surprise, before smiling and dropping the tildes. "Ah, now I remember...~"

~~~~~~~~~~~

Short, but well thought. by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-14 17:24:00 UTC Link to this

Ah, tildes...

I guess it wouldn't be hard for Agents to get a crate or two of them. Doujins (and Japanes fangirls' fics) are full of them.

It's because I use them in the IRC constantly for innuendo, (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-14 20:00:00 UTC Link to this

Wait. That was supposed to be innuendo? >_> (nm) by doctorlit on 2013-03-15 14:26:00 UTC Link to this

Lots of it is terrible on purpose. But once in a while, yes (nm by Riese on 2013-03-15 22:41:00 UTC Link to this

To the point that it begins to look like a sea of tildes. (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-14 23:02:00 UTC Link to this

All of the ~~~ (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-14 01:06:00 UTC Link to this

O-Objection! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-14 01:03:00 UTC Link to this

I know what the tildes mean!

THE NUMBERS, MASON, WHAT DO THEY MEAN? (nm) by HUDSON on 2013-03-14 01:07:00 UTC Link to this

WHY DID YOU SEDUCE HIM?! WE WANTED HIM A VERGIN! by World-Jumper on 2013-03-15 03:57:00 UTC Link to this

The Tidlies told me to, WHY DON'T YOU F&*%ING UNDERSTAND?!

I'm not even a fan of Call of Duty, but I had to make that reference.

And then I misspell tildes... (nm) by World-Jumper on 2013-03-15 04:00:00 UTC Link to this

Wait what? (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-15 21:07:00 UTC Link to this

What? by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-14 01:07:00 UTC Link to this

...What?

Call of Duty reference. Nevermind :P (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-14 01:16:00 UTC Link to this

I'm In, Late as Always (nm) by Star Albatross on 2013-03-14 00:53:00 UTC Link to this

So tradition says to retaliate and Plat/Riese. by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-13 23:52:00 UTC Link to this

DISCLAIMER: I have no idea what I'm talking about and did not make any attempt to format this or use readable English because I was laughing too hard. Just go with it.
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Riese was playing EVE one night when suddenly there came a knock upon his bedroom door. This disturbed Riese, as he was certain the sign on his door that read 'Trespassers will be shot - survivors will be shot again' would keep most people from knocking.

Shrugging, he stood up and walked over to the door, then opened it to see Plat standing there wearing a sexy smirk and nothing else.

"'Lo, Plat," Riese said, not really sure why there was a nekkid Plat in his hallway.

Plat's smirk turned into a sexy grin as he asked in a wine-smooth voice, "Do you mind if I come in, Riese?"

"Uh, could you put on some pa--"

But Riese quickly forgot what he was going to ask, because at that moment Plat swooned and sent Riese into a swoon.

"Sure, you can come in~..." Riese answered instead with a silly grin.

The two walked inside and closed the door and played a very different kind of game.
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

I DON'T EVEN KNOW. -flees-

*snerk* by Riese on 2013-03-13 23:55:00 UTC Link to this

OBJECTION!

I don't play EVE anymore. YOU FAIL AT CHARACTER WRITING XD

Pffthahaha, well played.

OBJECTION! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-13 23:56:00 UTC Link to this

YOU MENTIONED EVE IN THE IRC VERY RECENTLY!

Tsk tsk, Ms. Wrong. by Riese on 2013-03-14 00:07:00 UTC Link to this

Basing your case on such flimsy evidence....

the only reason you would do that is if...

YOU HAD NO CASE TO BEGIN WITH!

Your Honor, the Prosecution rests.

http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130111090206/aceattorney/images/5/52/Edgeworth-bow(a).gif

OBJECTION! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-14 00:44:00 UTC Link to this

Miles Edgeworth has never once referred to Phoenix Wright as Mr. Wrong!

Who are you really?

Why, Franziska, I'm surprised you don't recognize..... by Riese on 2013-03-14 01:02:00 UTC Link to this

....your own father!

Surely you must realize you're overmatched. And put that away, before you hurt yourself.

Honestly. Also, you seem to have been neglecting your practice. How else could you manage to become a quick-change artist, able to switch clothes in a single frame!

It's impossible!

Your Honor, I demand an end to this farce!

OBJECTION! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-14 01:15:00 UTC Link to this

Manfred von Karma also never said 'Mr. Wrong.'

I demand you unmask yourself this instant, you foolish fool of a fool's fool!

~ by Riese on 2013-03-14 01:44:00 UTC Link to this

WHAT ARE ALL THESE PICTURES I CAN'T EVEN. (nm) by DawnFire on 2013-03-14 16:29:00 UTC Link to this

Phoenix Wright GIFs by firemagic on 2013-03-14 16:49:00 UTC Link to this

It's a legal-themed video game.

COOL. Piiictuuurreeeesss... *grabby hands* by DawnFire on 2013-03-14 17:35:00 UTC Link to this

Seriously, I wasn't expecting to see gifs outside of tumblr. And then there's all of these anime-like lawyers in fancy clothes, and then there's River, and I just can't.

~DF

Ye can watch silent playthroughs on YouTube. by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-15 00:14:00 UTC Link to this

MegamanNG does the best ones ever. It's like watching a weird anime (9 out of 10 times).

Glad to have been of service. *bows* (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-14 19:59:00 UTC Link to this

THERE ARE NO SPOILERS IN REVEALING YOURSELF, IMPOSTER. by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-14 01:52:00 UTC Link to this

I demand you end this charade! Now!

That guy on the left. by Riese on 2013-03-14 01:58:00 UTC Link to this

You fail so hard right now... (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-14 02:33:00 UTC Link to this

No, really. I'm the dude on the left in the long johns (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-14 02:34:00 UTC Link to this

AND THAT IS WHY YOU FAAAAAAAIL. XD (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-14 02:49:00 UTC Link to this

It was actually a really fun role, and a great play. (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-14 02:52:00 UTC Link to this

I had an intelligent response to that... by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-14 00:18:00 UTC Link to this

...but the flood of Edgeworth GIFs totally made me forget.

(Shoot, I'm totally blanking out here! If I don't say something quick, the judge will rule in his favor!)

Damn you, I just choked on my water! (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-14 00:41:00 UTC Link to this

Er, Plat was supposed to flex, not swoon... (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-13 23:54:00 UTC Link to this

I'm in. Probably won't write anything, though. (nm) by ShatteredSanity on 2013-03-13 23:08:00 UTC Link to this

Okay, so I couldn't resist. KittyNoodles/Plat by Riese on 2013-03-13 22:42:00 UTC Link to this

KittyNoodles was sitting in her favorite chair, reading Pratchett, when her door opened. Plat stood in the doorframe, backlit by the fiery glory of a California sunset.

“Hello there, Kitty.” Plat’s voice was wine-smooth as he leaned sideways against the frame, crossing his arms.

Kitty raised an eyebrow. “’lo, Plat. What brings you here?”

“I was in the neighborhood, thought I’d stop by.”

“In the neighborhood, huh?” Kitty mock-pouted, eyes sparkling with laughter. “You need an excuse to see lil’ old me?”

“Hey, hey.” Plat straightened up and came the rest of the way into the little bungalow. “Of course not. But I was trying to be suave.”

“Suave. You.”

“Hey, I’m allowed to be suave.”

“Suuuure. Remember what happened last time you tried to be ‘dashing and adventurous?’”

“Hey, that table was getting old anyway. Breaking it was a favor. And you got better.”

“You’ve never apologized for that, you know.” Kitty slipped a scrap of paper into her book to mark the place, and stood with a graceful, fluid motion that accentuated her curves.

“I’m uh…I’m…um…” Plat suddenly felt like the temperature had jumped at least twenty degrees. “I’m uh…”

“You’re what?” Kitty paced slowly toward him, hips swaying side-to-side, eyes never leaving his face.

“I’m suh…suh…”

Kitty reached him and pressed in close, arms wrapping around his waist as she whispered in his ear. “I can’t hear you, Plat.”

Plat was starting to sweat ever so slightly. “I…um.”

Kitty pressed him back against the wall, tracing a single finger along his collarbone. “Say it.”

“I’m. Um. I’m sorry.”

“I can't heeeear you~...”

“I’m sorry!”

Kitty smiled lazily. “Good boy. Now, how are you going to repay me for breaking it?”

“Um…I..I’ve got some money som-“ He cut off with a hiss of indrawn breath as Kitty left a long scratch along his neck with one fingernail.

“Not like that, Plat.”

“Uh. L-like what, then?”

Kitty’s eyes smouldered. “Oh, I have a few ideas.”

“I-ideas?”

“Ideas, Mistress.” Kitty corrected.

Plat swallowed. “Ideas, M-mistress?”

Kitty’s smile turned even more lascivious. “Yes, Plat. Ideas.” She crossed over to the door, then turned back to Plat. “Oh, don’t look do worried. You’ll like them, I think.”

“Y-yes, Mistress…”

The door closed.

T'hihihi- by Desdendelle on 2013-03-13 23:24:00 UTC Link to this

T'hihihi-
T'hihihihihi-
No, really. Kitty as a dominatrix? I'm not sure whether to fall on the floor laughing or stare dumbfounded at the screen.

Both. by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-13 23:55:00 UTC Link to this

I'm about as dominant as a teddy bear! XD

~ (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-13 23:30:00 UTC Link to this

-chokes on tea again- by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-13 22:53:00 UTC Link to this

...Ahem.

OBJECTION.

I don't say 'lo. YOU FAIL AT CHARACTER WRITING. XD

I do hope everyone reading this realizes I am ribbing him because I can. And because he made me choke on my tea. This is the funniest thing I have read all year.

I'm sad that there's no flexing and swooning. (nm) by Ellipsis Flood on 2013-03-13 23:22:00 UTC Link to this

I forgot. No hips moving by themselves, either, sadly. (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-13 23:32:00 UTC Link to this

I'm in, but I probably won't write anything. (nm) by Tomash on 2013-03-13 21:55:00 UTC Link to this

Oh god, I totally missed this. I'm in. (nm) by Ellipsis Flood on 2013-03-13 21:17:00 UTC Link to this

Re: Oh god, I totally missed this. I'm in. by Ellipsis Flood on 2013-03-13 21:27:00 UTC Link to this

23, female, 5'1'' short, brunette.

Now for something slightly less citrusy by Data Junkie on 2013-03-13 08:01:00 UTC Link to this

It seemed like everyone always wanted Plat, but finally Bryn had gotten him alone, in a room with a real bed even. A long moment passed where the only sound in the room was their breathing, and they gazed at each other for what seemed like an eternity, each losing themselves in the other's eyes. Finally, Plat broke the silence.

"So."
"So?"
"Wanna play Kirby?"
"I... what?"
"Would you like to play Kirby with me?"
"Uh. Sure, I guess?"

And so they did.

Who's Plat? by Ivan the Not-so-Terrible on 2013-03-14 02:10:00 UTC Link to this

Did I miss something here?

Plat is Platinumyo. He's one of the IRC types. (nm) by VixenMage on 2013-03-14 03:44:00 UTC Link to this

Actual Canon post: Kirby Shipfic (nm) by Bryn on 2013-03-13 08:34:00 UTC Link to this

Phobos/Neshomeh/Herr Wozzeck by VixenMage on 2013-03-13 00:37:00 UTC Link to this

Neshomeh and Phobos were lying in bed one afternoon, murmuring softly, and doing whatever it is that happily married couples do in bed together*, when Neshomeh suddenly jumped up, cursing.

"What is it?" asked Phobos, watching her pull on clothes** and dig for her red pen amongst various bedroom detritus.

"I'm late!" Neshomeh pointed with one hand to the clock on the other side of the bedroom as she pulled on a shirt. "I was supposed to have a beta-ing session with Herr Wozzeck in ten minutes, and I'll never get there in time!"

Phobos sat up. "But that means I'll be here all alone," he said, pouting.

Neshomeh sighed, and nodded. "I did promise... but you can always use a second beta, right?"

Nodding enthusiastically, Phobos jumped out of bed*** and followed her out the door.

"The problem is," Neshomeh muttered, turning corners at random, "That I'll never be able to find the place in time. Why is it so hard to distract oneself from one's destination?"

Phobos grinned. "I think I can help with that..." he said.

---

Herr Wozzeck turned a corner at random, trying to not think about the library, or his beta meeting, and promptly tripped over Phobos and Neshomeh.

"Um... guys?"

They looked up. Neshomeh smiled cheerfully. "Oh! Herr! We were just... on our way to meet you!"

"For beta-ing," Phobos added helpfully.

"Er. So I see," Herr said, trying to close his jaw. "Are you... trying to find the library?"

They nodded.

"Do you need help?"

[And... scene.]

*Shadowrun, I assume.
**You don't need to be clothed to play Shadowrun!
***Scattering d6s, of course. Since that's what they were doing. Playing Shadowrun.

The notes made me laugh. by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-14 17:08:00 UTC Link to this

I guess things get heated when couples play Shadowrun... *can't find a way to make a joke about it*

And my attempt at making a lame joke failed because my brain apparently thinks that my jokes are too lame to even try thinking them.

I'm In~ (nm) by Caddy-Shack on 2013-03-13 00:26:00 UTC Link to this

Oh, geeze, almost forgot my description by Pretzel on 2013-03-13 00:10:00 UTC Link to this

5'2", blue-gray eyes, petite, dark brown hair (shoulder-length), tends to wear steampunk stuff whenever possible. Prefers female pronouns; doesn't care about how she's shipped with people. Have fun.

Kaitlyn/BeautyID by Huinesoron on 2013-03-12 20:31:00 UTC Link to this

"Oh, hey! You're awesome!"

"Well, yes, I know," BeautyID preened. "What brings this on?"

"Nothing!" Kaitlyn exclaimed (but did not explain). "You just are."

"Thank you," BiD acknowledged. "Now, how can I express my gratitude properly?"

"Oh, I can think of a few ways," Kaitlyn said - and leant in to kiss the other woman firmly on the lips.

After a while - a while that was filled with vaguely-watery noises - BiD asked, "Gratitude sufficiently expressed?"

"Hmm, I don't know," Kaitlyn said, her fingers trailing down the other woman's throat. "And of course, that was enjoyable - so now I have to show my gratitude, too..."

"We could be at this all day," BeautyID observed as Kaitlyn's fingers found her blouse's top button. She thought for a moment, and then added, "Good."

It wasn't too terribly long before the floor was strewn with clothes of various descriptions, a patchwork quilt of colours. Kaitlyn and BiD, on the other hand, were now seated on the floor, and displayed far fewer shades - a bit of brown, a bit of black, and quite a lot of skin-tones.

Also a hint of red, as BiD's tongue traced moist patterns over Kaitlyn's curves. Kaitlyn made a purring noise in her throat and stroked the other woman's hair lazily. A thought struck her, through the mists of pleasure. "Gosh - wouldn't you just die of embarassment if someone walked in just now?"

BeautyID lifted her head and considered this for a moment. "No," she decided. "I wouldn't notice."

Kaitlyn frowned. "Why not?"

"Because I'd be too busy doing this." And the brunette dived for Kaitlyn's waist.

Kaitlyn blinked. "Oh." Then, after a moment: "Oooh." And then, a little later: "Eep." Her hands, cut loose from central control, wandered vaguely over BiD's skin.

This apparently gave BeautyID ideas, as her hands swept down over Kaitlyn's stomach to vanish between her legs.

Kaitlyn let out a squeak.

There was a long period of considerable noise and movement.

Afterwards, Kaitlyn lay on her back, panting, her skin glistening with a film of sweat. She turned her head towards BeautyID, lying beside her in similar disarray.

"Oh, hey," the black-haired woman said, brushing tangled hair away from her face. "You're awesome."

Alright, fine. by World-Jumper on 2013-03-12 18:22:00 UTC Link to this

I don't think I'm necessarily going to write a shipfic, that's just not my thing, but feel free to make one about me. (Then again, KittyReice has been pricking at my mind...as well as Dawn of Vulcan...) This should be interesting.

If you decide you need information on my appearance, I would be happy to tell you, though I'm kinda interested in seeing what you think of me from my board persona, rather than me just telling you.

Now, while I wait to see what happens, I have to go and try to write that darned meeting again and then my first mission.

Uh... by DawnFire on 2013-03-12 20:38:00 UTC Link to this

...Dawn of Vulcan? Huh?

Someone want to jump on that and write something where either DawnFire or Silken Dawn goes to visit Hermione of Vulcan and... (take it from there)?

~DF

Well, I was thinking DawnFire/Hermione of Vulcan... by World-Jumper on 2013-03-13 19:12:00 UTC Link to this

But then again, Silken Dawn could work too. I like where this idea is going!

Anyway, realizing I actually do have to give some basic description of myself, here you go:
I am an 18 year old, caucasian male with brown/red hair and hazel eyes, overweight and requires glasses to see more then three feet in front of my face.

We could BOTH visit Hermione... by Silken Dawn on 2013-03-13 03:04:00 UTC Link to this

...although then neither of us could write it. Huh.

You could both visitÂ… by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-13 12:48:00 UTC Link to this

…And then fight over me, which breaks up when I choose both of you. Here's a quote:
"It was like when someone asked Kirk or Picard. If you didn't want to start a fight, you said Janeway. This was the Janeway solution. And Voyager was a great show!"

I don't want to write this, though. It feels awkward enough saying this much.

World-Jumper, you suggested it.

But... But I don't write shipfics! by World-Jumper on 2013-03-13 19:22:00 UTC Link to this

Fine. Give me a bit and I'll write it. Probably.

I didn't mean you had to. by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-13 20:54:00 UTC Link to this

Besides, I rarely write shipfic, and I'm writing for this. You don't even have to make it as NSFW as most of them are. I was just throwing out ideas.

Two Dawns Over Vulcan? (nm) (nm) by Silken Dawn on 2013-03-13 14:39:00 UTC Link to this

There actually isn't a rule... by Huinesoron on 2013-03-13 09:03:00 UTC Link to this

... against writing about yourself (witness: Very Odd Day and friends). However, it's generally best not to invent and write a ship about yourself and someone else. If someone else has already suggested it, that's a different matter.

hS

Huinesoron/Neshomeh by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-12 14:59:00 UTC Link to this

Neshomeh had been waiting. It had been three hours since Huinesoron had left, saying he was going to "welcome back" the returning oldbies. Nesh knew what that meant, of course - who wouldn't want a piece of the hottest elf in the multiverse?

However, Nesh still hoped that Huinesoron wouldn't forget the oldbie that had stayed beside him (also under him, and over him, and wrapped around him) all those years. Those years…

The door opened, and a perfectly muscled leg entered the room, followed by an equally perfect torso and the handsomest face ever seen.

"Huinesoron!" Nesh cried.

"What, did you think I would forget all you've done for me?" Huinesoron said., running his hand across her shoulder and down her back. "How can I?"

"I couldn't forget what you have done for me," Nesh murmured.

"I think there are things we can do for each other right now," Huinesoron said.

"I thought maybe Starwind Rohana and BeautyID had done enough for you - ooh, that's nice."

"Not enough," Huinesoron said, then proceeded to show her exactly how much they needed each other.

***

Hope I haven't offended anyone. My gods, this is fun to write.

I hesitate to say it, but... by DawnFire on 2013-03-12 13:17:00 UTC Link to this

Go ahead.

Just over 5', light brown hair, color-changing eyes (ok, ok, they don't really, but...actually, after all the badfic, I wouldn't be surprised if I'd caught that Sue-trait). Approximately two decades old. Female, and whatever sexuality necessary.

One request, though...try not to scar me with what you write, ok? :)

~DawnFire

(May or may not have once posited a very meta-y relationship with someone named Agent Dawn. Make of that what you will.)

hS and Kaitlyn are in. by Huinesoron on 2013-03-12 11:01:00 UTC Link to this

hS is male, British, brown hair, and rather too skinny for comfort. He may also be a Noldorin elf in disguise since the fall of Nargothrond, though the jury is still out on that.

Kaitlyn is female, American-but-most-Americans-think-she-sounds-British-now, loooong black hair, and glasses. Both are somewhere in their 20s (no, really - I lose track of this very easily).

Up next - shipping...

hS

BeautyID/Starwind Rohana by Huinesoron on 2013-03-12 11:03:00 UTC Link to this

Since they both recently returned, it must be because they felt a burning desire to see each other again... right?

"So... you came back too?"

"Well, you know how it is," Starwind shrugged. "Sometimes you just get a bit nostalgic."

"I do know," BeautyID chuckled. "For instance, do you remember the Shipfests?"

Starwind Rohana surprised herself with a giggle. "Well, I'd better!" she exclaimed.

(At this point it may be worth setting the scene. While the room itself is irrelevant, the large, soft bed likely is not. Nor is the fact that two women - blonde and brunette - are lying thereon. The brunette is running her fingers down the blonde's back - her bare back, which is a word which may become overused if any further description is needed)

"I did write the Multiverse Monitor, you know," Starwind went on. "The Shipfest was sort of my genre... okay, that's nice."

"I thought you'd like it," BeautyID murmured, shifting slightly to rub Starwind's spine. "How about this?"

"Mmm... yes," Starwind agreed. "So, the Shipfests?"

"Oh, yeah." BeautyID laughed. "You know, I might actually have been behind them. They were different in those days, of course."

"Oh, yeah?" Starwind rolled over and sat up (and at this point that adjective used earlier might have had a field day). "How so?"

BeautyID studied her (and yes, said adjective could be applied here, too). "Well, for one thing, they were rather more... energetic."

"Oh, really?" Starwind quirked an eyebrow. "Well, I think we can do something about that..."

hS

(PS: BiD is actually brunette, yes. She was sort of lying about her description earlier... imagine!)

What! Way to blow my cover! by BeautyID on 2013-03-12 18:42:00 UTC Link to this

*Re-adjusts blonde wig, glances around in a shifty manner*

Huinesoron/BeautyID/Starwind Rohana by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-12 12:59:00 UTC Link to this

Starwind Rohana and BeautyID may have both come back, and seen each other and decided to get together. However, the reason each of them came back was not, in fact, to see each other. (After all, how were they supposed to know the other would return at the same time?)

"You're quite wonderful alone, BeautyID," Starwind murmured. "But you know who would make this even better?"

"Hmm..." BeautyID mused. "This was wonderful, but unexpected. When I came back, there was something I expected. Someone I expected."

"Could this person possibly be the PPC's most charismatic elf?" Starwind asked.

"Why yes!" BeautyID said. "He got around a lot in the old days."

"Oh, I wish he would back!" Starwind sighed.

Due to plot contrivance, that was when the door opened, revealing the hottest person in the entire multiverse.

"Hello," Huinesoron said in his sexy British accent. "May I join you?"

"Oh, please!" Starwind and BeautyID giggled.

Huinesoron walked over to the bed and laid down, wrapping his arms around them both and fulfilling all their fantasies.

***

Heavily inspired by the Very Odd Day series.

Oh... dear. by Huinesoron on 2013-03-12 14:45:00 UTC Link to this

That even reads like Odd Day...

(Speaking of which, question: I can't remember leaving any copies of those stories accessible. Are they really still up somewhere?)

hS

Yes, they are. by DawnFire on 2013-03-12 17:50:00 UTC Link to this

And they're hilarious, as are the other stories there. Please don't take them down... *offers a bribe of Swiss Bleepolate*

~DF

... are we talking about... by Huinesoron on 2013-03-12 18:45:00 UTC Link to this

... this place? Because I honestly assumed that had been deleted years ago.

If so, I don't think I can delete it: I don't know the sign-in information any more. That website is very old.

(Also: there were once two sequels to Odd Day itself. They got... extremely epic. The principle behind them was that for three years, I wrote every ship I was mentioned in - in the same story. Which was hilarious, and I highly recommend that anyone who gets mentioned a lot do the same for themselves)

hS

Just so you know... by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-12 22:48:00 UTC Link to this

I have now added that link to the Very Odd Day wiki page. Too make it easier to find the insanity, of course.

Blast, to. (nm) by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-12 22:49:00 UTC Link to this

I believe we are, yes. by DawnFire on 2013-03-12 20:41:00 UTC Link to this

Oh, good. That is to say, the stories there were hilarious to read, and I'm glad they can't be taken down :D

(There were? Unfortunately, by your wording I'm guessing that they don't exist anywhere on the internet anymore...pity.)

~DF

Oh, so this is still running? by Starwind Rohana on 2013-03-12 10:34:00 UTC Link to this

Well, as the dirty-minded (ex-)editor of the Multiverse Monitor, I'm in. (Even if I'm only back for a brief visit.)

Oh, and... by Starwind Rohana on 2013-03-12 10:35:00 UTC Link to this

British female, 22 (good grief, I feel ancient), blonde, tall, long fingernails. (Looong fingernails. I've drawn blood. Once. Accidentally.)

I'm in! (nm) by Techno-Dann on 2013-03-12 06:51:00 UTC Link to this

Silken Dawn/Tray-Gnome by Khaosity on 2013-03-12 06:27:00 UTC Link to this

[This popped into my head when I saw that Tray-Gnome is apparently a squirrel.] Silken Dawn couldn't take it anymore. She desperately needed to feel some nuts in her hands. Tray-Gnome's nuts, to be exact. The squirrel in question was merrily scampering about its home forest, when it saw a tall shape approach. "I'm nuts about your nuts," Silken Dawn whispered. "Please show them to me." Tray-Gnome took her to a secret hiding place deep in the woods and exhibited its nuts. However, Silken Dawn frowned. "I'm sorry, but... I thought there'd be, well, more to them," she said disappointedly. "Why isn't there?" "I like to eat my nuts!", the anthropomorphized squirrel also known as Tray-Gnome exclaimed with a big grin on its face. Silken Dawn fainted. Shaking its head, the squirrel ran off, intent on securing more nuts for its food stash. [Sorry for overusing the word "nuts" and possibly for using "it" as a pronoun for Tray-Gnome, depending on whether I misinterpreted "agender" or not.]

I can't tell you how many times that's happened. (nm) (nm) by Silken Dawn on 2013-03-13 02:55:00 UTC Link to this

They/Them etc is preferable >. by Tray-Gnoem on 2013-03-12 14:06:00 UTC Link to this

Sorry again :-( by Khaosity on 2013-03-13 00:35:00 UTC Link to this

Well, at least I've learned something! My sincerest apologies, Tray-Gnome.

OMG A MINI-BOARDER. by DawnFire on 2013-03-12 17:51:00 UTC Link to this

It's, uh, a very, very small squirrel...is this normal?

Then again, 'normal' and the PPC...not really mixy things...

~DF

So this is still happening by BeautyID on 2013-03-12 05:23:00 UTC Link to this

I can't believe I (might have) been the origin of this madness.

Please, feel free to write about me. I am 6'4" with a muscular build, chin-length blonde hair, and I speak with an Albanian accent. Huinesoron has met me in person and can attest to the veracity of my self-description. You can pair me with anyone, male, female, in-between, EXCEPT the sons of Feanor, I CAN'T STAND those guys, ESPECIALLY Maglor, he's the absolute worst.

j/k I'm totally lying about the last thing.

Gosh, it's like you're standing in front of me. by Huinesoron on 2013-03-12 10:58:00 UTC Link to this

How did you write such an accurate description? Do you have some sort of magic computer program to create it for you? :P

(You are aware that by posting this you have guaranteed yourself an appearance, yes?)

hS

I'm in. (nm) by darklordaakmal on 2013-03-12 05:19:00 UTC Link to this

Desdendelle/Doclit by HerrWozzeck on 2013-03-12 03:36:00 UTC Link to this

Well, he wondered how many soldier jokes he was going to get. I don't think he expected THIS, though...

----**----

"So... you're a soldier."

Desdendelle glanced to the side, looking at Doclit curiously. "Why?" he asked. "Why is it important to a doctor?"

"Oh, you know how it is," Doc replied nervously. "I... well, I make sure animals don't get shot up."

"You won't have to worry about that," Des commented. "I don't actually shoot animals."

"Oh." Doc glanced to the side, before turning back to Des. Doc's gaze turned from Des' handsome sandy-blonde hair around the rest of his body. "I guess you pack a lot of guns, huh? I mean, being in the military and all."

Des rose an eyebrow, and then smirked. "As a matter of fact, I do," he said. "But I'm trained not to fire them unless I'm given good reason to."

"Oh?" "And what reason might that be?"

Des simply smirked, leaning closer to []. "Perhaps we can find out. I've got some free time later today..."

And so, Des and Doc ended up testing Des' guns throughout the rest of the day.

----**----

Sorry. Couldn't resist the number of gun-related euphemisms here. Hopefully you two aren't too bothered by it, LOL.

Sergio Turbo/Phobos by Neshomeh on 2013-03-11 23:10:00 UTC Link to this

As everyone knows, all Italians are handsome and hot. Therefore, this was inevitable.

One day, Sergio Turbo stood in front of the mirror, admiring himself. He turned one way, and then the other, admiring his hot Italian body from all angles.

"My goodness, I am so handsome and hot, it's unbelievable. I can hardly believe it myself!" he said.

"I can believe it," said a husky voice.

Sergio spun around and beheld the most handsome man he had ever seen (besides himself, of course). The man was leaning in the doorway, one raised arm against the frame, which perfectly showed off his pecs. He wore a sultry grin on his face and little else.

"Who are you?" gasped Sergio.

"I'm Phobos," said he. "I have a hankering for some hot Italian sausage, and I heard you're the man to see."

Sergio folded his arms skeptically, although he was starting to feel a hankering of his own. "Maybe, but I don't give my sausage to just anyone. What makes you think you can handle it?"

"Well," said Phobos, sauntering into the room, "my family does come from the old country, and I have been known to make some damn good sausage myself. I'll show you my recipe if you show me yours."

This was agreed by both parties to be equitable, and they spent the rest of the evening sharing their hot Italian sausages until they were both sated.

(( I blame Kippur's meat series for the intrusion of the sausage euphemisms into what was supposed to be pure green-on-white smut. Oh well.

~Neshomeh ))

I know I'm going to regret asking, but . . . by doctorlit on 2013-03-12 14:27:00 UTC Link to this

. . . green-on-white smut? Is that . . . elf on . . . Caucasian?

Alas, no. by Neshomeh on 2013-03-12 14:51:00 UTC Link to this

That's just me mangling the colors of the Italian flag. I forgot the red. >.
~Neshomeh

You made me choke on my tea... by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-12 05:58:00 UTC Link to this

Oh my god, this is how these things go? I love this game!

Yup! by Neshomeh on 2013-03-12 14:53:00 UTC Link to this

This isn't even my best work. {; P

~Neshomeh

Count me in! by Khaosity on 2013-03-11 22:34:00 UTC Link to this

Not sure if I'm actually gonna write something, but feel free to use me as you see fit ;-) For the record, I'm 22, female, 165cm (whatever that is in feet/inches), have dark red waist-length hair (yes, really) and brown eyes. All ships are acceptable and amusing.

Did someone say Boy Band? by Phobos on 2013-03-11 22:32:00 UTC Link to this

"All right, everyone," said Desdendelle from the front of the room. "We've got a show tonight and we still can't get this song right. Focus!"

"We've been at this for hours," complained Sergio Turbo. "The violin stings are hurting my fingers."

"Can someone turn my sheet music?" squeaked Tray-Gnome from the middle of the brass coils of his not-squirrel-sized tuba. "I can't reach it."

"This is not what I was promised," said Ivan, at the marimba. "Where are the tight leather pants? Where are the screaming fans?"

"You think tight leather pants just happen?" said Desdendelle. "Not without lots of rehearsal and a catchy hit song that everyone will forget within a week, they don't. Now focus."

"Can I switch my bagpipes for Riese's tambourine?" asked doctorlit.

"No," Des barked. "You switched earlier, and I told you you were stuck with the pipes. Can we just get on with this, guys?"

There was a lot of grumbling and shuffling around. Desdendelle started pondering the merits of a solo career.

Suddenly, from the back corner of the room, a woman spoke up. No one had noticed her until now because she was very quiet. She said, "So... I was going to recommend that someone get on top of the boy band. But you know what they say, 'If you want something done right...'" She she smiled and began working at her buttons. "Who's first?"

The guys in the room looked around at each other, unsure of what to do. This woman looked way too innocent to touch.

It didn't take long for Makari to set the record straight on that count and prove that looks can be deceiving.

((You really can't say things like "get on top of the boy band" around this game. It might give people ideas. -Phobos))

Violin and me. Two things that don't mix. by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-14 20:24:00 UTC Link to this

Actually, to be accurate it's "any musical instrument and me".

I expect someone to write the actual concert, though. (Not me - I'm not even writing the stuff I'm supposed to...)

My choice of phrasing on all fronts really was terrible, huh (nm by Makari on 2013-03-12 06:22:00 UTC Link to this

I'm gonna regret this aren't I? by Stargazing Sketcher on 2013-03-11 21:41:00 UTC Link to this

I'm a 19 year old Female ????(Read:I have no Idea whatsoever)Sexual

Please don't do anything crazy (yeah right)

Wait, it's already that time of year again? by firemagic on 2013-03-11 20:39:00 UTC Link to this

I could swear we just had it, but now that I think about it, I guess it has been a whole year! Well, I dunno how well I can write shipping fic, but I'll try my hand at it, and as with last year I'm in too!

Oh, and by firemagic on 2013-03-11 20:42:00 UTC Link to this

16-year-old female with whatever orientation works for your particular shipfic.

I'm in. by Ivan the Not-so-Terrible on 2013-03-11 19:56:00 UTC Link to this

All kinds of ships, I guess. I'm male.

I'm in. by Bryn on 2013-03-11 19:18:00 UTC Link to this

Pronouns he/they please :)

I'm in. *glee* by Cassie on 2013-03-11 18:22:00 UTC Link to this

I missed out on the last one or two. If anyone really wants the details, I'm 24, female, blonde, and bespectacled. Oh, and English.

Okay, I guess I'm in. by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-11 17:50:00 UTC Link to this

You can call my character Hermione. Shoulder length curly brown hair, glasses, brown eyes. 5'4". Bisexual for the purposes of this. Make Star Trek, Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, or My Little Pony references.

I probably won't write myself, but have fun. Please don't scar me. (hides in corner a la Fluttershy)

Addendum by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-12 03:33:00 UTC Link to this

I like chocolate. Use that however you will.

I'm in by Silken Dawn on 2013-03-11 17:42:00 UTC Link to this

*whispers* I'm up for shipping any which way, including cargo. :)

Also, stats! by Silken Dawn on 2013-03-13 02:58:00 UTC Link to this

25-year-old female, shortish, blonde, freckles, sometimes wears glasses.

Suuure. by Desdendelle on 2013-03-11 17:33:00 UTC Link to this

Go ahead, ship me. I wonder how many army jokes will be used.

Addendum by Desdendelle on 2013-03-11 21:39:00 UTC Link to this

I'm an 18 (almost 19) male. I'm also a soldier.

Addendum to the addendum by Desdendelle on 2013-03-11 22:46:00 UTC Link to this

Short sandy hair, 172 cm (that's 5'6''), black rectangular eyeglasses. No goatee - the army made me shave it :(

Okay, sure. by melancholicPoet on 2013-03-11 17:31:00 UTC Link to this

I'll join in
19, whatever, whatever.

oh, can I add in that people aren't supposed to write about themselves? just to avoid last years mishap?

I'm in! by VixenMage on 2013-03-11 17:31:00 UTC Link to this

Twenty-two, female*, bisexual, short and blond.

*not particular about gender, though

Can people without Permission join in? by Karen on 2013-03-11 17:24:00 UTC Link to this

Because if so, I'm all for!

Absolutely! (nm) by VixenMage on 2013-03-11 17:32:00 UTC Link to this

THEN I'M IN (nm) by Karen on 2013-03-11 17:43:00 UTC Link to this

Also in! by Neshomeh on 2013-03-11 17:10:00 UTC Link to this

And I ship the Madoka fans, the Nanoha fans, and the bronies (separately, but together would work, too). Friendship is magic, indeed. *eyebrow waggle*

~Neshomeh

And so you're following Phobos' evil plan of last year. by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-11 20:42:00 UTC Link to this

But, seriously, do you really think that shipping those three categories is a good idea? 'Cause breeding them means that we're going to have more "FRIENDSHIP AND BIG BOOM!" fanatics here.

This has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that I am in two of the three categories, and in fact I am a big fan of Homura aka Hommando and Nanoha aka White Devil.

Why should Magical Girls bother with wands, when they can pack some serious firepower?

Evil plan? What evil plan? by Neshomeh on 2013-03-11 22:44:00 UTC Link to this

No, really. My memory is awful. I have no idea what you're talking about. o.o

(However, one of your other posts has given me an evil idea of my own. Muahaha.)

~Neshomeh

Well, he tried to launch the Sergio Turbo/Firemagic ship.... by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-12 12:16:00 UTC Link to this

... Or was it Huinesoron? My memory isn't any better than tours.

*yours. by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-12 19:57:00 UTC Link to this

Seriously, why I wrote "tours"? those have nothing to do with memory. Or shipfics. I hope.

Hmmm by Desdendelle on 2013-03-11 22:15:00 UTC Link to this

-Counts on his hands- for the Nanoha and Madoka fandoms, IIRC there are me, Firemagic and Sergio. Someone should write a threesome. With lots of befriending. And giant magical lasers. And tea. (Mammaries optional.)

Ooh, I also ship Desdendelle/tea. by Neshomeh on 2013-03-11 22:45:00 UTC Link to this

Or me/tea, for that matter.

... This is going to lead to someone writing me/Des/tea, isn't it?

~Neshomeh

Nesh/Des/tea by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-12 03:00:00 UTC Link to this

There was a cup of tea sitting on the table. Neshomeh and Desdendelle both eyed it, for the tea was the love of both their lives, and each wanted to snatch it up and show it the extent of their feelings. Neshomeh reached for it, just as Desdendelle did the same. Their hands collided on the cup.

Des tugged on the cup, and Nesh pulled back. Des responded by tugging harder.

"That's mine!" Des said, trying to yank the cup out of Nesh's hands.

"No, it's mine!" Nesh insisted, keeping a firm grip and pulling harder. Des redoubled his efforts, now working on prying her fingers off.

"Yes!" he exclaimed triumphantly, holding up the cup to gaze at it in adoration.

"NOOO! MINE!" Nesh cried, diving over the table and tackling Des and the teacup to the ground. The tea splashed on both of them. They watched the teacup roll off into the distance and mourned the loss of their great love.

Nesh lay her head on Des's chest. "Why did we fight? The tea is lost!" She sniffed his tea stained shirt, then lifted her head. They locked eyes, simultaneously coming to the realization that mutual love of tea meant mutual love, and they fell into a passionate embrace. Who needs a teacup when you have a lover who is covered in tea?

***

Hope I didn't offend either of you. It was fun to write, and took much longer than it looks like it did.

{X D by Neshomeh on 2013-03-12 14:56:00 UTC Link to this

I am not offended, for this is awesome. (Not as good as tea, though.) ^_~

~Neshomeh

Aaand there's the Shipfest in a nutshell. (nm) by Huinesoron on 2013-03-12 12:12:00 UTC Link to this

*realizes she fits all three categories* (nm) by firemagic on 2013-03-11 20:41:00 UTC Link to this

Available. by doctorlit on 2013-03-11 17:04:00 UTC Link to this

Twenty-six-year-old asexual male. It would probably be useful to ignore the asexual part, though.

I am in by Phobos on 2013-03-11 15:44:00 UTC Link to this

An idea has already presented itself, so I will be back with a fic later today.

-Phobos

I'm in! by Tray-Gnome on 2013-03-11 15:31:00 UTC Link to this

19, pansexual, and agender!

Oh, also a squirrel. Forgot that bit. (nm) by Tray-Gnome on 2013-03-11 15:32:00 UTC Link to this

I'm in. by HerrWozzeck on 2013-03-11 14:06:00 UTC Link to this

22-year-old bisexual guy here. Go wild, ladies and gentlemen. =P

I'm in. by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-11 12:29:00 UTC Link to this

21 years old straight male. Ship to your heart's content.

Oh, forgot. by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-11 21:49:00 UTC Link to this

I'm Italian, too, so I am handsome and hot and... Nah, scratch that.

As if anyone would believe me anyway.

I'm in for it! by Pretzel on 2013-03-11 09:10:00 UTC Link to this

I may or may not write, though-- finals are upon me and ahuerhulfhn...

I'm in! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-11 08:52:00 UTC Link to this

Probably will not post, but feel free to use me as a character in any and all ensuing insanity!

And I call out (but don't plan to write): Riese and Lielac. If all parties are willing, of course. Otherwise ignore my calling-out.

I wonder where Lielac's gender-bender gun got to...~ (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-12 04:19:00 UTC Link to this

Didn't it also turn you into Saber Riese? by firemagic on 2013-03-12 16:22:00 UTC Link to this

Though Lie hasn't posted anything here yet, at least that I can see, so shouldn't you wait for that before writing anything?

We're actually discouraged from self-ficcing, IIRC. by Riese on 2013-03-12 16:40:00 UTC Link to this

Which isn't to say that you couldn't write something. I don't mind, and it doesn't have to be Lielac I'm shipped with :P

I think you're right by firemagic on 2013-03-12 17:38:00 UTC Link to this

Though 'you' was more referring to Kitty, but whatever.

Also, Lie isn't participating, so it's a bit of a moot point (nm by Riese on 2013-03-12 22:30:00 UTC Link to this

Didn't it also turn you into Saber Riese? by firemagic on 2013-03-12 16:21:00 UTC Link to this

Though Lie hasn't posted anything here yet, at least that I can see...

Don't make me get the Sentient Bucket, mister. (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-12 05:59:00 UTC Link to this

Shoot. by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-11 22:07:00 UTC Link to this

For the purposes of writing accurate height differences and such:

5'4", brownish-blondish hair that is wavy enough to pass as curly but not really and falls a little past the shoulders, I don't even know what my eye color is but it's probably grey-green or blue-green.

GAAAAAAAAH [expletive deleted]. by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-11 22:30:00 UTC Link to this

For further clarification: I'm nineteen, wear glasses and am bisexual for the purposes of this.

Also nineteen. /facepalms (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-12 17:20:00 UTC Link to this

Don't make me drag you back in the closet again...~ (nm) by Rin on 2013-03-11 19:44:00 UTC Link to this

I'm in~ by Riese on 2013-03-11 08:47:00 UTC Link to this

I may not post, but feel free to have your wicked way with me...~

Augh. Brainfart by Riese on 2013-03-11 19:42:00 UTC Link to this

20, 6'1 male. Brown hair, blue eyes. I don't always switch-hit, but when I do, I prefer to do it in Shipfest. Stay classy, my friends.

I'm in if you want me. by Makari on 2013-03-11 08:45:00 UTC Link to this

Though usually I seem to be too innocent to be touched. Also, I'm quiet and say nothing.

May I recommend that someone get on top of the boy band vintage before it goes off?

I love this time of year. by PitViperOfDoom on 2013-03-11 08:40:00 UTC Link to this

And as usual, feel free to ship me to the moon with whoever you choose.

Shameless MST Plug by HerrWozzeck on 2013-03-11 14:08:00 UTC Link to this

Hey, guys. Well... I may have mentioned this to some people in private messages, but I haven't mentioned it to all of the PPC yet. So...

For those not in the know, I started contributing to an MST blog on WordPress last year. I've been contributing with a few other people, and... well, one of 'em came back from a fairly long break recently. It's along story.

Anyway, I say this, 'cause that fellow contributor started an MST of My Immortal that you can find here:

http://literarytravesty.wordpress.com/2013/03/11/my-immortal-chapter-one/

Be sure to check it out, and also be sure to check out the other postings written by my fellow MSTers!

Ah, My Immortal MSTs never get old. by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-11 21:52:00 UTC Link to this

I'm glad I'm not the only person who had to look up all the musicians she mentioned. Also "It was… William Shatner narrating!" As a Trekkie who enjoys making fun of Shatner-speak...

Oh. My gosh. by Silken Dawn on 2013-03-11 20:55:00 UTC Link to this

Awesome site. I've been reading some of the older posts, and I just read the first part of ITS MY LIFE (the Portal one) and now my brain is weeping. Just... robots using (generic) drugs? And cutting themselves? A Sue getting pregnant from a robot the size and shape of a bowling ball? Someone finding Wheatley attractive?!
*falls silent; eyes show a blue screen of death*

Brb, rebooting Dawn. (nm) by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-11 21:17:00 UTC Link to this

Two remarks: by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-11 14:56:00 UTC Link to this

One: Oh, I have been waiting for a My Immortal MST. (I find them oddly rare...)

Two: As I find great joy in MSTing stuff myself (lack of new material notwithstanding), this is going right in my bookmarks.

New Mission: Antithesis of Harmony by Fenrir on 2013-03-13 06:42:00 UTC Link to this

http://www.fimfiction.net/story/34374/the-antithesis-of-harmony

Kirby/My Little Pony

This author desperately needs help. I actually know him in real life, and his will to continue as a writer seems to be fading. He's not awful, but he really needs someone who can give him a real critique of his story, and as I know next to nothing about the fandoms, my ability to help him is extremely limited. I've been doing my best, but I'm the only person who's really been trying to help him aside from the occasional comment and generic praise.

He's got some natural talent, but I don't think he really believes me when I tell him. He gets really down on himself a lot for not being able to write extensively in a single sitting, and frequently compares himself to far more experienced, and often much older, writers.

He responds well to constructive criticism, however, and you guys seem to be the best people to help: Good at what you do, and nice about it, without being unwilling to criticise.

I would really appreciate you guys starting a mission as soon as any of you could. He only recently really began writing, and is only now reading more often, too, and I really don't want to see him stop now.

Thanks a bunch, hopefully,

Fenrir666.

All your thread are belong to us! by Desdendelle on 2013-03-17 01:31:00 UTC Link to this

(Kidding.)
I do have a question, though. Is this missionable? It's a crossover between Forgotten Realms and Lord of the Rings.
On one hand, its SPaG is pretty much OK, and so far (I've read the first two chapters) the heroine does not look like a Sue. On the other hand, it copies LotR almost word for word (Rose Potter springs to mind), the main heroine is rather OOC, and the fact that she was inserted into the story does not change it at all save in some minor ways, a la In Spite of a Nail.

Going by this little snippet in chapter three... by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-17 19:59:00 UTC Link to this

"Because if we can kill or injure enough of them," Cierre explained, "those that remain will run away. It doesn't work with orcs, most are too stupid to picture themselves as the ones lying pouring out their life's blood on the grass, but it works with humans. And then we'll have reduced the enemy forces by a large number with only the effort it takes to kill half that many." Her teeth flashed white as she broke into a broad grin. "If we're lucky the orcs will try to stop them and then our enemies will be fighting amongst themselves for a time."
Aragorn raised his eyebrows. "You think we should concentrate our efforts on the Dunlendings?"
"Until they break," Cierre said, "and they will."
"You seem very certain," Aragorn said, "and yet you had not even heard of them until this moment."
"If they were determined enough to keep on coming, regardless of casualties," Cierre said, "they would have taken back this country generations ago, or else been exterminated in the attempt. No, if we hurt them enough they will flee the field."

Make of that what you will, but I do applaud the use of combat logic employed here. And a paragraph earlier, a sound explanation of armor worn by the Dunlendings by Gimli made me think that this author at lest had the basics down. Minor issue later on where neither Gimli nor Legolas knew what a crossbow was, as they fought orcs that used them in battle. And the whole "Bag of Holding" thing... really?

I say, keep an eye on it for now. If any future chapters get iffy, then we might need to consider it. But I think we can call this clean for now.

Options other than missions by Calista on 2013-03-15 19:06:00 UTC Link to this

There's options other than killing a fic. Maybe some of them would make sense.

PPC doesn't kill fics unless they're irredeemable, and even then they might rescue bit characters. This is because every fic has the potential to strengthen a continuum and every Author has the potential to become a goodfic author.

Option one: Send the author to an OFU. Is there one for MLP? If so, you could invite the author to submit a fanbrat. In the Real World, you simply teach him what you know about writing, and he gets better at it; problem solved.

Option two: Send in Intel. If there's not too much of a problem, they watch and wait until they know for sure. Allows for an in-character review without killing the fic.

Option three: Fixing glitches. When a fic isn't bad enough to be killed, but there is an error in it that could cause problems, a team of agents may be sent in to fix it. This works for fics which, other than a small number of mistakes, are good stories that will strengthen the continuum.

Option four: A non-lethal mission due to a clerical error that sent a moderately good fic to the Action Departments. Agents could go in expecting to kill a Sue, but realize the Sue has potential or the grammar is fixable. Maybe the more homicidal partner gets annoyed s/he doesn't get to kill anything, or maybe they both get annoyed with the Flowers or with their Console. In either case, they might get to explore the fic without touching it, or perhaps fix small mistakes as with the "Glitches" option.

I don't think that this is mission material, actually. by Outhra on 2013-03-13 14:42:00 UTC Link to this

I know, I'm a newbie and probably not as qualified as most to say this, but the fic doesn't seem as bad as the ones we typically do missions on. There are a few punctuation and organization problems, but not much that's really notably charge-worthy aside from Kirby suddenly learning to speak understandably(and I've never played Return to Dream Land; he might be able to talk there regardless).

Like Phobos said, a badfic that Agents are sent into would contain bad characterization, a strange or ridiculous plot that it thinks makes perfect sense, often terrible spelling, etcetera, and is deemed "bad" by a group of people that serve as impartial analyzers.

Antithesis of Harmony is more "first draft" than "badfic". Almost everyone is acceptably in character, and the ones that aren't either are only slightly deviated from their regular persona or their OOC moment has precedent in one of the two canons. The spelling is fine, aside from a few typos, and the grammar is only distorted due to the aforementioned organization problems.

I'm not sure what he "desperately needs help" with. If it's problems with working up the motivation to write, I don't know what a sporking could do for him, aside from making him reluctant to write again, and that's not what we'd want at all.

So...wait... by Phobos on 2013-03-13 13:30:00 UTC Link to this

It seems to me that what you want is not a mission. If the writing is not that bad, and your friend really just needs a self-esteem boost, then a mission is far from an ideal way to achieve your goals.

A mission takes a piece of bad writing and puts it through the wringer. It makes jokes at the expense of the bad spelling, punctuation, and grammar. It satirizes the bad characterizations. It usually involves totally dismantling the story to return the canon to normal. It focuses, almost exclusively, on what was done wrong. And that really is not what you need here.

I just want to make sure you know what you are asking. These terms have very specific meanings around here.

-Phobos

Reply to Phobos by Fenrir on 2013-03-13 21:34:00 UTC Link to this

Not so much a self-esteem boost as an actual criticism of what he did right and wrong. The lack of motivation he has stems from knowing he's doing something wrong, but not what (his words, not mine). I don't know enough about the source material to really help him. If, however, you guys only critique particularly bad fanfiction, then I apologize for misunderstanding. I thought it was a blanket 'everything that isn't quite *good*'. I figured someone here might be able to tell him what's good and what's not, and where good could be better and where bad could be removed or improved. I've tried, but I don't like My Little Pony and I actively dislike Kirby (no offense to Kirby fans, I just prefer darker games), and all I could really say was 'spelling seems okay'. He keeps telling me that the fic isn't good, but he doesn't know how to make it so. It's the lack of knowing *how* to improve that seems to be bugging him, rather than needing a hug. He's been trying to rewrite the damn thing since August, only recently posting a half-chapter in January, then promptly going back into the funk.

If it honestly isn't bad, however, I might achieve the same effect by telling him you guys said that there wasn't anything wrong with it, and he just needs to stop being a perfectionist.

Not exactly. by VixenMage on 2013-03-13 21:54:00 UTC Link to this

Everyone is capable of concrit! Constructive criticism is a thing that anyone in the PPC should be able to do - but a mission is, as Phobos pointed out, rather more harsh. Missions also tend to happen if and when someone wants to write them, since they are a commitment of time and effort, and... yes, they do tend to be written about really bad fanfic, rather than "Alright but needs work" fanfic.

Constructive criticism is something that all writers need, even if whatever they're writing isn't that bad - so if you're asking for that, it's probably doable. I don't know the canons, but I can certainly critique writing, and most PPCers are fair hands at that.

Reply to VixenMage by Fenrir on 2013-03-13 22:47:00 UTC Link to this

Yeah, I just didn't realize what Phobos was trying to tell me. Anyone who could give a decent review would be much appreciated, then.

Wait, stop. by Ellipsis Flood on 2013-03-13 21:51:00 UTC Link to this

You're jumping to conclusions here.

1. Phobos' problem with your request was that you don't seem to understand the term Mission. What your friend needs is actual criticism. As you pointed out. Not a mission. If someone satirized a work you weren't sure about in the first place, would that actually make you rewrite it?

2. I'm not a fan of either franchise, so I can't tell if it's good or bad. Also, a few things have already been pointed out by Outhra. What your friend needs is a review that's more than "ZOMG TEH AWESOME!"

Replu Eillipsis by Fenrir on 2013-03-13 22:46:00 UTC Link to this

Oh, that explains it. Sorry, my bad.

*nabs Eillipsis and runs away* (nm) by firemagic on 2013-03-14 14:21:00 UTC Link to this

As an alternative... by Huinesoron on 2013-03-13 18:01:00 UTC Link to this

... someone who actually knows both canons (I know neither ;)) could send an Intelligence agent into the story; that would produce a report that summarises what is bad about it, but could also cover what is good.

Alternately, and probably easier (and more helpful!), said knowledgable person could leave a review...

hS

Well, I know Kirby and MLP quite well, so... by HerrWozzeck on 2013-03-14 00:44:00 UTC Link to this

I don't have any intelligence agents, but I can do reviews. I'll just make a note to myself not to take this fic to my MST blog.

I'll see if I can take a look at the fic over the course of this week. It's halfway through my spring break and I have other things to do, but I'll give it a look-through and see what I can say about it.

(On a side note? My expectations are actually pretty good for this one: Kirby and MLP are two continua that can very easily meld into one another, so... Yeah. Bright and happy continua tend to do that.)

Temp work? by Calista on 2013-03-15 18:53:00 UTC Link to this

You could have your current agents sent an overflow Intel mission, or help out friends in the Intel department. Lots of potential for hilarity when agents who don't know the work set out into a fic! Maybe the Intel agents are indisposed for some reason (more potential for funny) and your agents have to step in.

About that... by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-15 20:37:00 UTC Link to this

*LE SHAMELESS SELF PLUG*

I think this might be a relevant excerpt from one of my spinoffs:

"Members of the Department of Floaters now worked alongside the spies due to the DoI’s extremely low recruitment rates. Only twenty-three new spies had joined Intel in the past year (among them a little unicorn pony, of all things), so it had been necessary to pull some Floaters off of their regular duties to work part-time in the Sorting Room. Since Floaters was one of the largest and fastest growing departments in the PPC, it was reasoned that it could afford to allocate some of its agents to surveillance duties."

It wouldn't be too far of a stretch for some Floaters to be assigned a temporary positon in the Cubicle Maze and be sent out to do Intel runs...

...what? No, of course I'm not trying to recruit more Intel agents!

Two issues with that: by HerrWozzeck on 2013-03-15 20:26:00 UTC Link to this

1) One of my RCs is getting a new agent in their next interlude, and my other RC is getting transferred to a new department as well, and it's not Intelligence.

2) From what I've read so far, this fic actually isn't that bad. Really, there isn't enough material here to build a mission with regardless of how much funny can be had in the set-up. Plus, both of my RCs have characters that know one of the canons involved (Eusabius in my DIC RC knows all the major Nintendo continua including Kirby (as you'll see in my next mission), not to mention that both Florestan from my DIC RC and Xanthus in my Floaters RC know MLP), so I wouldn't have the real opportunity to make them confused about the canons.

Reply to Herr by Anonymous on 2013-03-14 03:56:00 UTC Link to this

That's great, I really appreciate it,thanks!

Reply to Huinsoror by Fenrir on 2013-03-13 21:35:00 UTC Link to this

That would be great!

*Grabs mini-boarder and runs* (nm) by Apricot on 2013-03-14 02:40:00 UTC Link to this

This one is new. by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-14 20:14:00 UTC Link to this

And there are already several mini-Boarders patterned after Huinesoron...

Seriously, Huinesoron, were you planning for a mini army when you chose your username?

No such thing as mini-Boarders back then. by Huinesoron on 2013-03-15 01:13:00 UTC Link to this

Back in the days when everyone spelled perfectly, y'know. But then Hunesoron and Hinesoron came along within a few days of each other, and things were never the same again...

hS (and people manage to misspell that, too...)

On the subject of the colour buge... by Cyba Zero on 2013-03-16 14:13:00 UTC Link to this

Seeing as I currently cannot edit the wiki due to the editor stubbornly refusing to load on either IE or Firefox, I will post here instead. I wonder: is anybody else having trouble editing the Wiki at the moment?

Outhra, you recently asked me on the Wiki about the Suvian colour 'buge'. I see it as a mixture of beige and red (from the French: rouge). It was actually a horrendous misspelling of 'Borg', found in a Star Trek badfic (my mission six), and tends to act as a magnet for that particular species (as opposed to red in Star Trek, which acts as a magnet for trouble in general).

Hermione of Vulcan was planning to mention it in OFAS, too, as it has the potential to cause all sorts of mayhem. Do feel free to catalogue it.

Beige and red, eh? by Outhra on 2013-03-17 01:49:00 UTC Link to this

Wow, prompt response. I didn't expect to be answered so quickly, though in retrospect, I'm not entirely sure why.

So, if the color resulted from a misspelling of Borg, does that mean the mini-Tribble Buge is buge in color? I've noticed that minis tend to take on characteristics of what the mistake harkens to; I remember how your mini Mess Efekt was able to cloak, and a Stargate mini named General Laundry possessed a basket of laundry that he could command mentally. If the mini is buge, I feel bad for the little guy. Nobody is going to want to adopt a Sue-colored mini.

The color has been catalogued already, it seems. Good job to Hermione of Vulcan for doing that, and I look forward to reading the new OFUS chapter. In fact, I wasn't even aware that there was a Star Trek Fanfiction University currently in progress. Huzzah! Another to read! Now, off to find it.

Hey, maybe Buge has found a good home at OFUS! A Sue-colored mini would probably be extra-effective at enforcing rules through pain. After all, if it hurts to look at it, it will probably hurt even more if it tackles you to the ground for trying to glomp a canon character!

Well... by Cyba Zero on 2013-03-17 15:10:00 UTC Link to this

Oh, the mini would definitely be buge-coloured, and it probably has implants, too. Also, seeing as my agents stopped off at OFAS (note, not OFUS - OFAS stands for the Official Fanfiction Academy of Starfleet) on their way back from that mission, most of the minis they found would have taken up residence there.

As such, I would imagine Buge the mini is now a mini-Gorn with Borg implants and buge-coloured scales, guarding the staff of OFAS from fangirl stampedes etc.

I forgot about name permutations for the Universities. by Outhra on 2013-03-17 16:15:00 UTC Link to this

I've noted the change now, though. I guess that's why I couldn't find OFUS when I searched last night. It was OFAS all along! Such a simple defense, but so effective.

I didn't know that the minis transform into new guarding-optimized forms when they enter an Fanfiction University. Would this be related to why the Pokémon Universities have mini-Deoxys and mini-Missingno when the minis found in missions are mini-Rayquaza? A polymorphic mini-Pokémon would be better at tracking and punishing out-of-bounds fanbrats, and it looks like the Gorn transformation serves a similar purpose, just in terms of increasing brute strength rather than efficiency of defense.

On a slightly sillier note, have the minis based on misspellings of Borg ever tried to network into a mini-Collective?

On mini-Tribbles and mini-Gorn. by Cyba Zero on 2013-03-17 20:00:00 UTC Link to this

The Star Trek continuum is somewhat unique with regards to minis. Basically, there was once a DS9 OFU that never got more than a few chapters, but it mentioned mini-Tribbles. However, that OFU hasn't been updated in years, and I'm sure that if anybody were to actually visit the space-station that once housed that OFU, they would find it rusting, dusty and probably inhabited by something unpleasant (or just completely overrun with mini-Tribbles). Needless to say, it's been abandoned for years.

Then Hermione of Vulcan (and Apricot) came along and started OFAS (unaware of this other one to start with, I believe), and staffed it with mini-Gorn. Then she found out about the first one and came up with an explanation for having two types of minis for a continuum (said explanation being 'Q', so that works).

As for minis of misspellings of Borg, it would make a lot of sense if they did have their own mini-Collective (fanbrats' nightmare; *cackles evilly*). I'm not sure how all the mini misspellings of the Borg Queen would handle it, though - they'd probably share in one sense or another. That or all the minis could just hook up to the main Collective.

On a slight side-note, the assimilated mini-Stus in Phi's care do have their own network, as do the mini-Colossi, Joke and Mess Efekt (because in Mass Effect, the Geth are a networked race).

That explains why the DS9 characters weren't part of OFAS. by Outhra on 2013-03-18 03:27:00 UTC Link to this

I imagine that the first Star Trek OFU(which, as I have found out, is called OFUST: DS9. What a mouthful. Seriously, try saying it all at once.) was devastated by its Designated OFU Emergency, and the mini-Tribbles have multiplied until they have the run of the place. Either that, or it survived perfectly well and just doesn't want to make contact with the OFAS for administrative purposes. That second option isn't as interesting, though.

So, the new mini type is Q's doing, just like the abandoned planet with HQ-styled halls is Q's doing and the numerous canons plucked from all across time-space and given indefinite leave from their duties is Q's doing? That's the great thing about Q. He is to Star Trek what the Unicron Singularity is to Transformers, or the events of Thief of Time are to the Discworld, except instead of being limited to only space and time(at which point the term "limited" has already come into question), the unexplainable things could come from anywhere. Dealing with inconsistency or general confusion in Star Trek can be easily explained by saying "This is the home continuum of a capricious omnipotent being with free rein over the cosmos. The question isn't whether it can be done, the question is why something like it hadn't been done before."

If the Borg's name-mistakes had all been linked into one central Collective, the mini-Queens would probably just serve as coordinators of some sort. As much as I like the idea of a Borg Queen power struggle acted out by mini-Gorn, it's not really a Borg thing to do to squabble within their ranks when there is a task to be done. In this case, it would be defense of the Academy and the sanctity of the Collective rather than assimilation of the other minis(probably), but it would be taken up with no less fervor.

Speaking of the mini-Colossi, is there a Board-run adoption center for their continuum, like there is for the mini-Balrogs? One of my agents-in-progress has a soft spot for mechanical minis, and while I don't know much about Mass Effect other than the basics of the races and setting, and thus couldn't spork a story myself, he'd probably enjoy having a little geth running around the RC. Between your and Herr Wozzeck's missions alone, there should be at least twenty of the little guys without supervisors.
I almost said "owners", and then I remembered what typical mini behavior is like.

Mini-Colossi by Cyba Zero on 2013-03-18 09:52:00 UTC Link to this

I think the general method of adoption for mini-Colossi is to browse their page on the Wiki (http://ppc.wikia.com/wiki/Mini/Mass_Effect) and post to the Board saying which one(s) you would like to adopt. Unfortunately, the Wiki page editor still won't load for me, so somebody else will have to update the Wiki page.

*an Official Fanfiction University by Outhra on 2013-03-17 16:16:00 UTC Link to this

I noticed just after posting that I deleted "Official", and accidentally performed the cardinal a/an replacement sin. It was unintentional, I assure you.

I'll catalog it for you. by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-16 16:45:00 UTC Link to this

The wiki is letting me edit it, but I'm using Google Chrome, so that might have something to do with it. I'm quoting what you're saying here, hope you don't mind.

Also, thanks for reminding me of its existence...I just got a great idea for my next next chapter (I say "next next" because I'm almost done with the next chapter, so it would be the chapter after that.)

Thanks! by Cyba Zero on 2013-03-16 19:17:00 UTC Link to this

Oh goody, I've been looking forward to chapter nine for ages!

I thought it was blue and beige... by MAXinsanity on 2013-03-16 16:45:00 UTC Link to this

But thanks for clearing that up.

Hi by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 01:07:00 UTC Link to this

Hello all you PPCers...hi...
I'm Pauline07 (at least, that's the name I tend to use on the net) but Pauline or "Bones" (something that started a while ago on another site) is perfectly fine.
I found PPC a while ago while searching for information on "Agony in Pink" (rest assured I did NOT read it, I couldn't even get through My Immortal, so...I'm just curious, honest). I thought about joining, but I'm somewhat naturally shy and socially awkward, so I decided to think about it for a while.
Well, here we are about a year later and I finally re-found the wiki after the thing driving me crazy for a while when I decided I wanted more information and couldn't remember for the life of me what the board was called...rest assured I'm heading to bookmark this thing as soon as I finish this.
I'm a reformed badfic writer....yes, I know, I regret it big time,look at any piece of fanfiction on FF.net that I ever wrote and feel free to spork it or laugh and point as you wish,pen name's the same. I leave it up because my last computer blew up, pretty much, and I want to remind myself to NEVER go there again...because I wrote bad, BAD Mary Sues. And I am never going there for the rest of my life. LEARNED MY LESSON!
Which is why I wanted to join the PPC, because I definitely find badfic to just annoy me. After a while sometimes I'll just find myself looking at an unreadable story and going...."God...universe...someone..."
Other than that...I have a dog and a cat, who I'll often refer to when talking, Bingo and Friskey. I'm fourteen, a freshman in high school and I speak English and passable intermediate French. I play piano, guitar, sing, dance, act- pretty much anything artistic and performing wise, I'm into (Although I'm not in band or orchestra- they aren't really for me). I live in Iowa, which is hot as fire in the summer and cold as Antarctica in the winter; however, it annoys me when everyone says that the state is just corn- it's a large part of the state but really...
And I've been overusing ellipses, dang it.
Personality wise, I'm somewhat over-literal (hence the "Bones") and socially awkward. I'm rather scatterbrained, though, but when something's important enough to me, I tend to stay on top of it. I'm VERY peppy and enthusiastic and a bit hyper.
So, I guess that's it. Hello world.

Welcome, newbie! by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-18 16:37:00 UTC Link to this

Sorry I didn't welcome you earlier. Most of us are reformed badfic writers (I thank the Powers That Be that none of mine ended up online), so that's fine. If you ever decide to get Permission and write missions, you could spork them yourself.

Oh, newbie gift! Have a fluffy hat (color/pattern your choice).

About living in Iowa - of course it's not all about corn! It's the future birthplace of Captain James T. Kirk!

Re: Welcome, newbie! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-18 17:36:00 UTC Link to this

Really, it's fine! Thanks for the welcome anyway!
Oh, gosh, you really are lucky. I just am lucky I never really thought to ask any really good writers I came across to read them...I may have driven them insane otherwise. Thank the PTB that most of them never ended up finished...don't know if I'll spork them, I'll think about it.
Ha, thanks! I love it! (puts it on) Perfect for sunny weather (although we did get an inch of snow last night....but it's actually really nice out).
Nice! Thanks. Hopefully he never heard the piano jokes...

Salutations! by Myrddin on 2013-03-18 15:56:00 UTC Link to this

Howdy! Welcome, welcome!

It looks like we semi share a couple fandoms. I used to be a big fan of Bones, but was really upset a couple years ago when they did the flash-back to before the first episode. I feel that really messed things up. But that's just my opinion XD I am however a big fan of Psych!

Oh, and I have to ask... since you live in Iowa... Do you have cows? Can you see your neighbors? Are there any big cities there? How many rooms did your school-house have?

(Sorry... as a native Nebraskan I just couldn't resist! I got those kind of questions when I was traveling on the east coast several years ago, heck I still get those kind of questions from friends that live as close as Chicago! I know... I'm such a dork! XD)

Anyway, welcome gifts! I have for you a packet of my limited edition Atlantian sponge capsules! Just add water and you get a full-sized sponge city, in the architectural design style(s) of your whim! And because I have subjected you to my nutiness concerning your geography straight out of the chute, *digs in bag o' goodies* I know it's in here somewhere, ah there it is! I've got a second gift for you! It's a genuine Carnotaurus skin! ("Chameleons of unparalleled skill." -Richard Levine JP:The Lost World) Perfect for those of us that like to remain lost in the woodwork/wallpaper observing most of the time! :D

Re: Salutations! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-18 16:07:00 UTC Link to this

Hello! Hehe, thanks!
Oh, I loved that flashback. It was, like, a year before the first epi though. It explained why Booth completely annoyed Bones in the first several episodes. I like Psych, but I don't know it as well as other fandoms. (Please don't look at the psych fic I have on the pit, that is (insert bad word here))
In order, no, yes, yes, and I have no idea, considering it's a school for one grade and seven-hundred kids.
Haha! Don't worry! One time a friend of mine went to see her sister in New York, when her professor says "You're from Iowa? I had no idea there were pianos in Iowa!"
I feel your pain...
Oh, thank you! I love it. I'll just put it in this watertight container, because I don't think my neighbor would be too happy if a city suddenly grew in the middle of our houses....but I'll have to use it sometime!
Thank you! Perfect for lunch! I hate having people talk to me when I'm trying to read.

That's hilarious! In kind of a sad way... by Myrddin on 2013-03-18 23:59:00 UTC Link to this

"You're from Iowa? I had no idea there were pianos in Iowa!"
*dies laughing*

I thought the flashback kind of destroyed the wonderful love/hate relationship they had just spent the last 100 episodes building by completely changing the motivations/connotations behind everything we had seen about their interactions up to that point. But that's just me. XD

I love Psych, but one couldn't really say I was extraordinarily familiar with it, but it's a great show. Now you have me curious about your fic though!

Re: That's hilarious! In kind of a sad way... by Pauline07 on 2013-03-19 02:53:00 UTC Link to this

....lovely ignorant people....
That's true, but I'm a big fan of B squared, so I may be a bit biased about that episode. They're like Ron and Hermione (except I actually am not the biggest fan of those two....I like Harry/Hermione, actually....but never mind)
Psych is hilarious. Shawn is so smart and he just....knows it. And here comes Gus, just trying to survive!
Oh God....it's one, very short chapter...not even sure where the heck it was going, but it sucks. You can already tell April's a Sue just by reading it. It's useless for nothing but the trash...April is actually painful to look at...

I guess by Myrddin on 2013-03-21 16:30:00 UTC Link to this

I just loved the dynamic they had already built, and then to go back and redefine everything, I could never see those episodes again in the same way. I don't know, I just feel that was something they should have explained in the pilot, or maybe even as far as the end/beginning of the first/second seasons. But to go back after five seasons and basically rewrite their relationship. Meh. My opinion of it seems to be somewhat in the minority among the fans that I know, so maybe it's just my own little hang up. XD

Shawn and Gus are awesome, sometimes though I do want to see someone take Shawn down a peg or two. XD Just for his own good of course. XD Yeah... I see where you're coming from with April... though I must admit I am curious what power she is using to come up with what she knows and the whole "ping" thing. ^^

Re: Hi by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-18 03:34:00 UTC Link to this

Welcome, fellow N00b. :) *tosses you a small black key fob*

That is a Universal Key Fob. Use it to commandeer any vehicle you come across, be it a Ford Mondeo, a Corvette ZR1, an F-35 jet, or the Starship Enterprise, or any vehicle in between! :D Should you commandeer another one, the previous vehicle will instantly return to the place you took it from, with the odometer rolled back to the way it was.

Oh, a fellow reformed badfic writer. Feel free to take weapon parts or ammo you need out of the Infinite Armory, in the battle to undo your damage.

Re: Hi by Pauline07 on 2013-03-18 15:59:00 UTC Link to this

Hello, fellow newbie! Can't wait to see you around here!
Oh, wow, thanks! Actually, really helpful once I get my permit in a couple weeks...hehe, thanks!
Oh God, yes. I wrote absolute (insert bad word here). I'm hoping to please the goodfic gods by working here. You too? Here (tosses him a block of extremely dense material for bashing sue heads and a sword), You might be needing these.

Erin go Braugh! by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-17 19:43:00 UTC Link to this

Because it's St. Patrick's Day, of course.

Have a gift from teh Specs:

A Green Potion!

Self-refilling; potion gives random effect, from polymorph to temporary invincibility. Cost of use - combat efficiency down 25%.

Re: Erin go Braugh! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 21:24:00 UTC Link to this

Thank you. I wonder what it'll do the first time....

Halloo thar! by Karen on 2013-03-17 18:53:00 UTC Link to this

Have a cookie?

Re: Halloo thar! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 21:23:00 UTC Link to this

Mm! Thank you!

Welcome! by Lynne Lloyd on 2013-03-17 13:47:00 UTC Link to this

Welcome to the Board! I think we'll get along just fine. Have some Bleepolate-chip cookies, because they're delicious and I like handing them out to people. Maybe we can eat them while laughing at 'Sues! Don't worry about your old fanfiction. I'm sure we all have the stains of bad writing on our hands from some point or another.

Re: Welcome! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 16:20:00 UTC Link to this

Thank you! I'm pretty psyched.
Oh thank you! /Eats one after an unfortunate mix up on the HP fanfiction area/ Mmm, they are delicious!
Sounds like a plan. Where to begin....
I won't. I know better now and I will never be writing anything like THAT again.

Hello! by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-17 09:42:00 UTC Link to this

Welcome to the Board! Have some of my hydrophobic water to commemorate the event. Made of the essence of sheer improbability itself. Drink, but carefully...

Re: Hello! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 16:12:00 UTC Link to this

Why, thank you! I've never seen anything like it. /Looks interestingly at the water/ I love scientific stuff!

Good to have you a-Board! by doctorlit on 2013-03-17 06:11:00 UTC Link to this

Greetings, new friend! Grab yourself a Bone Club and start thwacking away at badfic baddies!

Re: Good to have you a-Board! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 16:08:00 UTC Link to this

Thank you! Can I use it on my cruddy sound card first before I throw the pieces on the freeway?

Smash away! (nm) by doctorlit on 2013-03-18 03:56:00 UTC Link to this

Re: Smash away! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-18 16:08:00 UTC Link to this

Thanks, doc! (Looks evilly at poor sound card :))

Hello, hello! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 05:16:00 UTC Link to this

Welcome to the Board, Pauline! I'm KittyNoodles, and as a welcome gift I have placed one box of bleepnerds and an Odd Container in your inventory!

(Don't worry - I'm an ex-badficcer myself. At least you had the courage to admit it during your introduction! :D)

Odd Container
Item Level 1
Chance on Opening: Receive one shower of confetti or one huggle - your choice.
[This container is perfectly spherical and appears to have been crafted from glite-painted wood. Its weight changes at odd intervals, and you have the feeling opening it may prove hazardous to your health if you are unwary.]

Ignore that last bit, the flavor text hates me...

Re: Hello, hello! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 05:36:00 UTC Link to this

Hehe, Thanks, Kitty!
Oh, those bleepnerds are getting.....some...use....a lot of use. Excuse me while I read some former stuff I considered good that I wrote, then go hurl and eat a couple bleepnerds.
I should really take them down, but for some reason they stay up.....

Re: Hello, hello! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 07:00:00 UTC Link to this

Totally understand. I more or less abandoned my old account on the Pit about five months ago, because it was literally NOTHING but Naruto-meets-real-world-high-school fics.

Re: Hello, hello! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 16:07:00 UTC Link to this

I feel your pain. Unfortunately, mine was Mary Sue fourteen year old who skipped grades in random fandoms. Considering you have to be 21 years of age to become an FBI agent, I really didn't think some of them through....it's kind of ridiculous.
The Pit?

Re: Hello, hello! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 19:42:00 UTC Link to this

The Pit is the PPC nickname for FanFiction.Net. Pretty sure it comes from the sheer amount of badly-written fics there. XD

(My very first fanfic cast Neji Hyuga as a girl because I didn't wait to watch the episodes HE shows up in before writing about him. XD)

Re: Hello, hello! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 21:31:00 UTC Link to this

Actually, that makes a lot of sense....seriously, take a random sampling at any given time from the PR category and watch the sheer amount of bad slash and Mary Sues galore....
Hehe, gender bending...

Welcome! by firemagic on 2013-03-17 05:00:00 UTC Link to this

I already said hi to you in the IRC (as Karrin Blue) so... hi again! Have a model of the Astro Megaship.

Re: Welcome! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 05:33:00 UTC Link to this

Hey Kerrin! Thanks so much, I love it!

Re: Welcome! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 05:33:00 UTC Link to this

I'll put Mr. Mini Andros inside....

He can be friends with the mini-Boarder Kerrin! (nm) by firemagic on 2013-03-17 16:47:00 UTC Link to this

Re: He can be friends with the mini-Boarder Kerrin! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 21:29:00 UTC Link to this

Along with the mini Pauline and Karone!

Oh hai there! by HerrWozzeck on 2013-03-17 04:39:00 UTC Link to this

Welcome to the PPC! We love newbies here, so we hope you'll stay with us here!

As a welcome gift, have some music by Karlheinz Stockhausen: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T16_lfYBsd4

Re: Oh hai there! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 04:48:00 UTC Link to this

Thank you! I'm really sorry I can't hear the music yet, but I promise I'll listen to it tomorrow when my (insert bad word here) sound card finally gets fixed. I hate my computer.
Definitely planning on staying, don't worry. Thanks!

Hello, newbie! by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-17 03:59:00 UTC Link to this

Hello and welcome to the PPC! I see that you've already met some of the locals. You'll come to see that we are all different degrees of insane.

As for the obligatory gift...
*rummages through bag of holding*
AHA!
...have some Axem Rangers figurines! (I hope you get the reference...)

Speaking about what to do with the gifts: you don't really need to do anything. It's our PPC tradition for welcoming newbies. However, I've seen at least one PPCer actually have her agents possess those gifts in-universe, so you might consider that once you gain Permission.

Re: Hello, newbie! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 04:46:00 UTC Link to this

Thanks! I've met a few people, yeah. Although it would have been nice for my sound card to be working this afternoon....ehh, whatever. Sort of figured the insanity thing. Oh well, actually am kind of crazy, so it's not like I'll be the odd one out.
Sorry, had to google it. I don't play Mario! But I love them anyway. I love the gift, thanks! Might as well possess 'em in universe. They're sitting right next to my Henry plushy!
Thanks!

Fandoms list by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 03:39:00 UTC Link to this

Hello again.
Thank you all for the virtual gifts....so very kind of you. I feel pretty welcome already! It's nice to be included.
Anyway, so a few people have pointed out that I forgot a list of my favorite fandoms...thanks for that, I completely forgot.
I do most of my writing concerning the BtVS series, since most of what I consider my best fanfiction happens to lie on Twisting the Hellmouth (though sometimes I wonder if that stuff doesn't suck too....it's at least gotten reviews that make more sense, so I consider that a plus). On from that, I tend to stay with Charmed, Harry Potter, and Power Rangers territory; since those are the fandoms I know best. I'll also work with Bones, Missing, and very rarely Psych and Ghost Whisperer. Musicals tend to spark challenges more than actual story ideas, and that pretty much goes for any musical that starts to become melodramatic.
So, as a better list:
Favorite Fandoms:
BtVS
Charmed
Harry Potter
Power Rangers
Fandoms I Know Well, but aren't favorites:
Bones
Missing
Psych
Ghost Whisperer
SNL skits(Didn't put this up there because I just started working with it)
Melodramatic musicals (i.e: Jekyll and Hyde, Les Mes, Sunset Boulevard, ect.)

Welcome. by MAXinsanity on 2013-03-17 03:34:00 UTC Link to this

Have a box full of random stuff that I don't know what it is.

Re: Welcome. by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 04:25:00 UTC Link to this

Thanks Max. This'll be really helpful, I'm sure.

Greetings! by World-Jumper on 2013-03-17 03:09:00 UTC Link to this

Glad to see you built up the courage to come and say hello. Trust me, we do not juge people by their writings, so don't feel bad about your Past Sins. (Please get the reference, please get the reference, please...) Besides, what kind of person would I be if I judged based off what people wrote? They are words created from an idea, an idea that may or may not be good, but an idea nonetheless. Besides, I am a terrible speller. Atrocious at times. Without spellcheck to save me, I have embarrased myself many times here. It's all good though, and I even got permision recently. I guess what I am trying to say is, ' don't worry about it.'

Now, gifts. Actualy, if you could give me a list of fandoms you are part of, that would be fantastic. I like to give semi-personalised gifts you see.

Welcome to the board!

Re: Greetings! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 04:23:00 UTC Link to this

Thanks! Erm...I'm sorry, I don't get the reference, sorry to disappoint. What's it from?
Anyways, yeah, I have Mary Sues in my past....unluckily enough my interesting spelling mistakes only in essays to my teachers, which considering I got those words right on spelling tests befuddled the heck out of them.
Have fun with your story! How exciting you got permission! I can't wait to read it!
Just posted up a fandom list, so go ahead and have a looksie.
Thanks again!

Exelent. by World-Jumper on 2013-03-17 08:19:00 UTC Link to this

Darn it, did not get the reference. :( Well, it makes sense, seeing My Little Pony: Frendship is Magic is not on your fandom list. Past Sins is one of the most controversial fanfics of the brony fandom: it is either one of the best fanfictions ever written, or it is a terrible Mary Sue fic that needs to die in a fire and forgoten about forever. I see it as a Mary Sue fic, but not bad enough to be sporked, but that is beside the point.

Yeah, bad spelling on essays... I have done that way too much. Oh well.

Now, at long last, your gift! I give onto thee, one wand from Harry Potter. Seems what Umbrige said about muggles with wands was not total BS. Better still, the wand is exactly what you would hope for in a wand, whatever that is.

Re: Exelent. by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 16:02:00 UTC Link to this

Now it sounds a bit familiar.....I must have heard of it somewhere, but I've never read it. Not that I've read My Little Pony fanfiction. Unfortunately, I don't think I ever picked up the show as a kid. Sounds...interesting, though.
So. Have. I. Though now it's easier because most of the one's I do have to be typed. Spell-check still swears I spell my name wrong, though. And everyone else's.
Merci! Oh, I love it! My last one got snapped while fighting dementors in an airport ;) Really, thank you!

You are quite welcome! by World-Jumper on 2013-03-17 18:38:00 UTC Link to this

The show you are thinking of is different from the show I am speaking of. My Little Pony is a show from the 80's and 90's that was not very good. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is a show being created right now that started in 2010 and has recently finished its third season. It is a realy good show, though I won't give you the speach I usiualy do. All you need to know is that it has a MASSIVE fanbase known as 'Bronies.' They are absolutely mad with all the things they create, including fanfiction. If you want to know more, I would sugest you watch an episode. Lesson Zero shows how far the writers and animators are just about willing to go (and that's pretty far) Sonic Rainboom is a cool episode, and Dragonshy is one of their awesome adventure episodes. They should be on YouTube, so just ask Uncle Google for the episodes and you should be all set.

Confession time: I once misspelled my teacher's name on a paper. In two different ways. She was my english teacher. Yeah... Though Spell Check is a godsend, and without it… I would probably be a much better speller because I would have to learn how. But that is irrelivant.

Ah, good to hear that I managed to replace a lost item! Just be more careful around airports this time, alright?

Re: You are quite welcome! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 21:28:00 UTC Link to this

Sorry, I didn't realize. All I know about My Little Pony are hand me down pony dolls from my sort-of sisters....I might try to catch one!
Oh gosh, yeah, too bad spell-check doesn't catch those mistakes. Hah! I wish. Or when you write it at one am, don't have time to do a final check in the morning, and then realize you misspelled "it".
I will, I promise! I would never loose a gift (ooh! Shiny golden color coming out of the tip!)

Welcome! by Khaosity on 2013-03-17 02:52:00 UTC Link to this

I hereby present to you some Bleep'n'ms (Bleeprin and m'n'ms, good for combating the effects of badfic) and... a limited edition Unspecified Plushie(TM)! This squishy thing transforms into your favorite character once it knows who it is! On that note, what are your fandoms? Don't worry about having written 'Sues. I'm sure a lot of us look back on stuff we've written and cringe. Personally, I'm guilty of really bad angst, and that was when I was two years older than you! Oh, and if you couldn't handle My Immortal, you'll definitely want to stay away from the rest of the Legendary Badfics... So, I've rambled enough, greetings, hello, and welcome to the Board!

Re: Welcome! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 04:08:00 UTC Link to this

Thanks for the Bleep'n'ms! Those will be getting a lot of use.....a...lot....of...use.....sorry, seen too many Purple Ranger Mary Sues. And the plushie has just turned into Henry Mitchell from Charmed, by the way. He is currently sitting down with my imaginary stuffed phoenix (really long story as to why I associate those two in my head).
Oh Gods, I look at my stories and I don't remember writing some of them. I don't want to....some of them really just need the reader to have some Bleeprin. I am ashamed I even considered writing them in the first place.
Yeah, definitely staying away from most of the really bad stuff....although there are some things I wish I'd never read in my life....
Anyway, thanks so much for the welcome!

Henry Mitchell? by Khaosity on 2013-03-17 23:03:00 UTC Link to this

Who is he again? It's been years since I watched Charmed...
The only fandom we have in common is Harry Potter, but it's a very large one, so that's okay. For a break from the bad stuff, you could maybe look up "Cauterize" by Lady Altair on the Pit. (My dumb phone isn't letting me add a link.) Absolutely no Bleeproducts needed, but a box of tissues is highly advisable.
You're welcome for the welcome! :-)

Re: Henry Mitchell? by Pauline07 on 2013-03-18 00:26:00 UTC Link to this

Henry's the one Paige, the youngest, ends up with. They have such chemistry and I just love him!
May I suggest "Harry's Little Black Book"? Gosh, I can't remember for the life of me who it's by, but you'll know it when you see it (the author has long notes about the mods who run the Pit). Other than that, no Bleeproducts needed as well, but after probably....ok, just keep the tissues close to the computer at all times as well.

Re: Henry Mitchell? by Pauline07 on 2013-03-18 00:33:00 UTC Link to this

Oh my.....thanks for the recommendation. I loved it.

Here's the link by Pauline07 on 2013-03-22 04:23:00 UTC Link to this

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8202762/1/Harry-s-Little-Black-Notebook

Found it already, but forgot to tell you... by Khaosity on 2013-03-23 12:01:00 UTC Link to this

Sorry! It was cute and I'd like to see how it continues. The comments about the mods were fun, too. Thank you! And I'm glad you enjoyed "Cauterize".

Hello there! by darklordaakmal on 2013-03-17 01:54:00 UTC Link to this

I also learn French, but it's horrible enough to make any Francophobe proud. As for your gift, I offer you a virtual pen with a bottle of squid ink, and a virtual notepad, made by Morgoth himself while he is still making mini-Balrogs. So be careful when making a spelling mistake, and preparelots of bacon and eggs.

Re: Hello there! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 03:49:00 UTC Link to this

Hehe. Je parle francais pour la classe. Je suis en Francais II.
Merci! Thanks for the pen and squid ink, as well as the notepad. I'll be careful, I promise.

Ah, another newbie! Hello! by Outhra on 2013-03-17 01:27:00 UTC Link to this

Once again, the grand PPC tradition falls to me; the previously shiniest newbie passing the metaphorical torch to the most recent arrival. Carry it well, and don't forget to pass it on to the next newbie to arrive.

With that out of the way, welcome to the PPC! I know as well as you how long it can take for a socially awkward person to post here, since I am one myself.
By the way, if you could list some of your most fervent fandoms, that would be a lot of help for others to get to know you, if only to know what sort of newbie gifts to present you with. We tend to shower the newbies with assorted presents of various degrees of seriousness.

As for my gift to you... let's see... let me rummage in my Big Bag of Assorted Objects.
Ah! Here you are! I present to you, a storm-sphere! Inside this simple glass ball resides a weather anomaly of immense power. Just toss it on the ground, and rain and wind will descend upon your immediate. Excellent for, among other things, providing escape cover from foes of many sorts, irrigating parched lands, and melting wicked witches!

Re: Ah, another newbie! Hello! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 03:28:00 UTC Link to this

Thanks for the torch! I'll remember to pass it on to the next person. I just hope I'll do it justice.
Just, thanks for the welcome. Honestly, I don't really know what else to say. Like I said, socially awkward! Though it's nice to know that I'm not the only one slightly out of my element here.
On a completely different note....I'm a little confused about the virtual gifts. Is there something I'm supposed to do with them? Not that I'm not grateful, just not completely sure what's going on....
It's nice to meet you, and thanks!

Hi~~~ by Desdendelle on 2013-03-17 01:27:00 UTC Link to this

(I should really stop using tildes. That's not a good practice.)
Welcome to the PPC! By posting here you have joined - just remember to leave your sanity at the door.
More seriously, though, you should read The Constitution, and it is recommended that you read some of the stuff that's stored in the Wiki, especially The Original Series. You are also more than welcome to drop by in the IRC channel and say hi.
Since there's a practice of giving newbies gifts, I'll give you this cup of tea. Just don't let the leaves eat you.

Re: Hi~~~ by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 03:44:00 UTC Link to this

Oh, I left my sanity somewhere a long time ago. But thanks for that!
I've read The Constitution, and I'm working my way through the Wiki and The Original Series (with a fair amount of wikipedia on my side, since I never actually read the LoTR series). So far it's been pretty fun. Thanks for the advice, though.
Thanks for the tea....erm....I'll be sure to keep that in mind....what kind of tea is it, exactly?

Re: Hi~~~ by Desdendelle on 2013-03-17 17:32:00 UTC Link to this

Carnivorous, what else? More precisely, carnivorous Earl Grey. Bleeprin optional.

Re: Hi~~~ by Pauline07 on 2013-03-17 21:32:00 UTC Link to this

Ow! Ow! Hey, stop biting me, stupid tea, dang it!
Mm, the tea is great, though. Thanks!

I b'lieve I've discovered a new Sue color... by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 20:36:00 UTC Link to this

It doesn't have a Sue-y name yet, but it's described as 'more greener'.

The defense holds that this color is a disgustingly dark green that turns bright lime-green in direct sunlight. When used in clothing, both colors are present in the same fabric, kind of like Sue-colored velvet.

Thoughts?

(Oops, and the fic I found this in is right here. Seventh paragraph down - or third big paragraph.)

Re: I b'lieve I've discovered a new Sue color... by Pauline07 on 2013-03-18 16:18:00 UTC Link to this

Sounds.....interesting (or revolting). I'd love to see the fabric if this would actually happen (or throw the offending piece of fabric into the fire pit)

Oh, trust me, you'll see it. by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-19 04:00:00 UTC Link to this

It's one of the official colors of OFUA, so of course there will be meen and glite jerseys and sweaters available for students to purchase before the year is out.

OBJECTION! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 23:32:00 UTC Link to this

The defense demands that the prosecution tell the court what it's talking about!

It's very simple, Mr. Wright. by The Prosecution on 2013-03-17 23:34:00 UTC Link to this

It's been my goal all along to have the defendant, 'Meen', declared a Suvian color. You just did my work for me!

Thank you kindly, Mr. Wright. I didn't even have to work for my 'Guilty' verdict.

OBJECTION! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 23:49:00 UTC Link to this

The defense has held from the beginning that this color is Suvian! The true case at hand...

Is whether or not this color exists as a separate Suvian color from the others we already know of!

We've been arguing the same thing from the beginning, Wright by The Prosecution on 2013-03-17 23:53:00 UTC Link to this

That's why I rested my case....

Because you'd already proven Meen's guilt!

OBJECTION! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 23:58:00 UTC Link to this

I've been arguing that Meen is a new color.

You were the one arguing something entirely different! Whether or not Meen is Suvian is not the case at hand!

What we are really here to decide...

...Is whether or not it is a new color that deserves to be added to the list of known Suvian colors!

Of course. by The Prosecution on 2013-03-18 00:03:00 UTC Link to this

If it i a new color, and Suvian...

It should obviously be on the list.

Wh-WHAAAAAAAAAAAT?! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-18 00:04:00 UTC Link to this

THEN HOW DID I GET A GUILTY VERIDCT?!

Ha Ha Ha Ha by The Prosecution on 2013-03-18 00:07:00 UTC Link to this

If it's new...and Suvian...

How could it possibly be anything but guilty? Have you forgotten where we are, Mr. Wright?

Oh, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-18 00:13:00 UTC Link to this

Th-that's impossible! Then... then this was all for nothing?!

I'm sorry, Mia... I just couldn't win this time...

??? by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-18 00:23:00 UTC Link to this

The defense isn't done yet, Your Honor! If what Mr. Edgeworth says is true, then we should not have gotten a guilty verdict! In fact, if what he says is true, then the prosecution has failed to do its job by disproving the idea that this color is a new Suvian color!

....... by Riese on 2013-03-18 00:36:00 UTC Link to this

I-I didn't squee! S-stop lying!

Riese: by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-18 01:13:00 UTC Link to this

Putting the 'tsun' and 'tsundere' since whenever the heck.

I do not! B-baka! (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-18 19:41:00 UTC Link to this

Yuh-huh. by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-19 13:22:00 UTC Link to this

M-Mia?! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-18 00:28:00 UTC Link to this

(She's right! If I've been trying all along to prove this is a new color...)

(...Then a guilty verdict would mean I had failed to do so!)

Your Honor! The defense demands that you reassess your verdict in this case!

How do you even keep posting all of these .gifs? by Outhra on 2013-03-18 00:55:00 UTC Link to this

Here I am, not even knowing how the hyperlink function works here, and here are two people skilled enough at bending the Board to their will to have lengthy Phoenix Wright references in the form of dueling animated images. Bravo.

I would post an applause .gif, but as implied by the title of this post, I have no clue how I would go about doing it.

Check here for cheats. by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-18 01:02:00 UTC Link to this

http://yourwebapps.com/WebApps/db-view.cgi?db=83303&sort=1&

Lots of help here.

So... by Khaosity on 2013-03-18 02:55:00 UTC Link to this

this should be red this should be blue this should be purple *has new toy* It's about 3 am here and I have to work tomorrow (not until 2 pm, thank goodness), but, well... as I said, new toy!

Oi! -baps- by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-19 04:02:00 UTC Link to this

There are many HTML codes for this Board, Khaosity, and none of them should be used lightly!

Today. I have to work LATER TODAY. I can't brain... (nm) by Khaosity on 2013-03-18 03:17:00 UTC Link to this

OBJECTION by The Prosecution on 2013-03-18 00:34:00 UTC Link to this

T-this is an outrage!

Objection overruled. by Judge on 2013-03-18 00:35:00 UTC Link to this

Mr. Wright, I am intrigued. You may continue.

This is your chance, Phoenix! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-18 00:38:00 UTC Link to this

Time to turn this case on its head!

Right, Chief! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-18 00:43:00 UTC Link to this

Your Honor, the defense agrees that Suvian colors are all, by default, guilty. That goes without question.

However!

The point of this case was never to argue that to begin with! The only reason we're here is to determine whether or not Meen is in fact a new color!

Since the defense holds that it IS a new Suvian color...

...A 'guilty' verdict should only be handed down if the defense fails to prove as much to the court!

! by Judge on 2013-03-18 00:46:00 UTC Link to this

Ah. Well then. If the defense would restate its case, I believe we can bring this to a close.

Gladly, Your Honor! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-18 00:56:00 UTC Link to this

The defense holds that the defendant, Meen, is a new Suvian color. Therefore, the defense seeks to disprove the prosecution's claim that it is not a new color and should not be added to the list.

In other words, Your Honor, a guilty verdict in this trial would mean that the court has decided Meen is NOT a new Suvian color!

Hmmm. by Judge on 2013-03-18 01:01:00 UTC Link to this

All right, then. In light of this, I hereby declare the defendant

((EPILOGUE)) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-18 01:12:00 UTC Link to this

Great job in there, Phoenix! I knew you could do it!

Th-thanks, Mia...

Bonus Scene:

That was fun! :D (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-18 01:14:00 UTC Link to this

We should absolutely do this more often. by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-18 01:17:00 UTC Link to this

Except next time, I call Edgeworth.

Also I want to roleplay as him next time. :D

Suuuuure. And the next time, I get Manfred von Karma. (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-18 01:19:00 UTC Link to this

IT'S A (court) DATE, THEN. (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-18 01:21:00 UTC Link to this

Well played! (nm) by Riese on 2013-03-18 01:25:00 UTC Link to this

Thank you, I thought it was. -brushes shoulders off- (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-18 01:37:00 UTC Link to this

'More greener' by Quantum on 2013-03-17 22:27:00 UTC Link to this

Based on your description, I suspect it is the waste product of some suvian abomination. That, or it is one of my cooking experiments has gone awry, again.

Nope and nope. by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 22:43:00 UTC Link to this

It's used to describe the difference between one landscape and another.

Dang, I'm good. by Ellipsis Flood on 2013-03-17 22:49:00 UTC Link to this

I had just mentioned my ISP's old slogan "Doesn't get any greener." (Translated from German)

I thus suggest this as meen's appearance in a reality room:

UPDATE: I'm dubbing this color 'meen'. (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 20:52:00 UTC Link to this

Tsk tsk. by The Prosecution on 2013-03-17 20:40:00 UTC Link to this

A brilliant theory, truly.

http://www.court-records.net/animation/edgeworth-smirk(a).gif

BUT.

http://www.court-records.net/animation/edgeworth-document(b).gif

The record clearly shows that it is NOT the seventh paragraph down! It's the eighth!

http://www.court-records.net/animation/edgeworth-handondesk(b).gif

Explain yourself!

Ack! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 20:46:00 UTC Link to this

No waaaaaaaaaay!

Uhm, uh, well that's just a minor detail...

Not so fast! by The Prosecution on 2013-03-17 20:53:00 UTC Link to this

This "minor detail" has great bearing on the reader's ability to understand what you're saying!

You can't possibly call that minor!

Er, well, you see... by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 20:59:00 UTC Link to this

Uhm, that's not exactly what I meant...

Ahem! by Judge on 2013-03-17 21:01:00 UTC Link to this

The defense will be more careful in the future!

Y-yes, Your Honor... by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 21:02:00 UTC Link to this

Very well, then. by Judge on 2013-03-17 21:08:00 UTC Link to this

The defense may proceed.

OBJECTION! (Disregard other, broken link) by The Prosecution on 2013-03-17 21:24:00 UTC Link to this

There is no need, Your Honor, the defense has no case!

OBJECTION! by The Prosecution on 2013-03-17 21:13:00 UTC Link to this

Your Honor, there is no need. The defense has no case.

OBJECTION! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 21:23:00 UTC Link to this

The defense still holds that this new color - 'more greener' - is found within the chapter provided and is a disgustingly dark green until it comes into contact with direct sunlight, at which point it turns bright lime-green!

These facts...

...remain indisputable!

The defense's logic has a certain legitimacy to it... by The Prosecution on 2013-03-17 21:30:00 UTC Link to this

However!

If you've mixed up such a minor detail so badly, why should we believe you haven't made more mistakes in your case?!

Aha, but Mr. Edgeworth... by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 21:40:00 UTC Link to this

You yourself have not been flawless with your case!

Just now, you claimed to have had a broken link in one of your posts. However...

The defense could not spot any such links anywhere in the post you were referring to!

How can this court be so certain you are to be trusted when you overlook something so blatantly obvious?!

Urk..! by The Prosecution on 2013-03-17 21:44:00 UTC Link to this

T-that's irrelevant! It has no bearing on this case!

And my point stands, Wright!

OBJECTION! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 21:50:00 UTC Link to this

If you want to go that route...

Then can you really say the defense's poor choice of words has any bearing on this case?!

I can and I will. by The Prosecution on 2013-03-17 21:56:00 UTC Link to this

The fact that I accidentally included a broken link in no way misled the members of this court as to the nature of the case.

Yours, on the other hand, obviously did!

And on a further note! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 22:05:00 UTC Link to this

I didn't say it was your inclusion of a broken link! I was referring to the fact...

...that the link in question is not broken at all!

The fact that I used the word 'minor' didn't mislead anyone! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 22:02:00 UTC Link to this

I'm not the one who's being misleading here, Wright! by The Prosecution on 2013-03-17 22:07:00 UTC Link to this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdIlP488n14

The fact remains that you cited entirely the wrong paragraph! There's no way to talk your way out of this - I've got you cornered!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdIlP488n14

Urk! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 22:13:00 UTC Link to this

That may be true, however...

How is this still a point of contention if this matter of which paragraph this color shows up in has already been cleared up?

Tsk tsk! by The Prosecution on 2013-03-17 22:18:00 UTC Link to this

I see you've managed to miss the point entirely.

This was never a question of whether you'd cleared up the matter - it was a question of your reliability! If you can't even get the paragraph right, what else have you gotten wrong?!

R-right back at you! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 22:23:00 UTC Link to this

If you're willing to try and hide the fact that the image you presented was simply not the one you wanted to use by calling it a broken link...

...What else are you hiding from the court?!

OBJECTION! by The Prosecution on 2013-03-17 22:28:00 UTC Link to this

Your Honor, I request the defense refrain from ad hominem attacks.

((Darn you, Riese...)) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 22:40:00 UTC Link to this

((You know I can't think straight when I'm staring at a smiling Edgeworth.))

Well, Mr. Wright? What do you have to say for yourself? by Judge on 2013-03-17 22:29:00 UTC Link to this

OBJECTION! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 22:38:00 UTC Link to this

The defense was only following the prosecution's own tactic by bringing up something already said in this trial and using it against the prosecution!

In other words...

Ad hominem either never came into play in my argument, or the prosecution is equally guilty of it!

GAH! by The Prosecution on 2013-03-17 22:49:00 UTC Link to this

Y-you upstart....amateur...

Grr...M-my point still stands! I demand the defense give proof that it remains reliable!

Order! I will have order! Enough of this! by Judge on 2013-03-17 22:53:00 UTC Link to this

No, Your Honor! by The Prosecution on 2013-03-17 22:55:00 UTC Link to this

I will have an answer to this!

I-I've been overruled?! by Judge on 2013-03-17 22:55:00 UTC Link to this

Oh, c'mon, Your Honor, don't let him do that...! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 23:03:00 UTC Link to this

(Oh man, he's got the Judge under his thumb here! I'm really in trouble now!)

Tsk tsk. by The Prosecution on 2013-03-17 23:08:00 UTC Link to this

What's the matter, Wright? You don't know the answer?

Or could it be that...

http://s1161.beta.photobucket.com/user/YankeeFlyBoy/media/Reaction%20Folder/Edgeworth/Animation_006_zpsdbadc439.gif.html?sort=3&o=30

There isn't an answer? You're blowing smoke, Wright!

OBJECTION! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 23:22:00 UTC Link to this

The defense has all the evidence it needs that it remains reliable, and it's right here!

It's right here, in this post by a third party!

This post is undeniable proof that not only does this new Suvian color exist...

...BUT THAT IT ALSO POSSESSES THE ABILITY TO BECOME LIME-GREEN UNDER CERTAIN CONDITIONS!

Ha ha ha ha by The Prosecution on 2013-03-17 23:26:00 UTC Link to this

You've played right into my trap, Wright!

Your Honor, the Prosecution rests.

I see. by Judge on 2013-03-17 23:27:00 UTC Link to this

Well then, given the evidence, I must declare the defendant, 'Meen'...

Thank you, Your Honor. by The Prosecution on 2013-03-17 23:32:00 UTC Link to this

N-no... by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 23:52:00 UTC Link to this

This can't be the end...

Phoenix... by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 23:54:00 UTC Link to this

...Don't give up yet, Phoenix...

OMG YOU CAN PUT GIFS ON THE BOARD (nm) by Karen on 2013-03-17 21:47:00 UTC Link to this

YES, U CAN! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-17 22:01:00 UTC Link to this

THANK YOU MASTER (nm) by Karen on 2013-03-18 00:52:00 UTC Link to this

How? by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-17 23:17:00 UTC Link to this

i.e., what is the HTML code for embedding pics on the Board?

Re: How? by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-18 00:09:00 UTC Link to this

Minus the spaces and quotation marks, of course.

Thanks by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-18 06:15:00 UTC Link to this

-paws at the colorful picture~- (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-18 07:01:00 UTC Link to this

Oh, that's how you do it. by Outhra on 2013-03-18 01:02:00 UTC Link to this

Well, now I'm a little embarrassed for not reading all the way to the bottom of the chain before replying.

Here is the applause .gif that I talked about earlier, members of the .gif courtroom.

You deserve it.

I feel so special~ (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-18 01:38:00 UTC Link to this

Hello! Is newbie here. by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-18 02:17:00 UTC Link to this

Hey. I came across this fine group called the PPC thanks to TVTropes. I read the Original Series (loved it) and a few missions on the side. Once I managed to get rid of the stitches, I decided, what the heck, I'd love to be a part of this.

Should I tell more about myself here? Or am I good?

Welcome to the Board! by Silken Dawn on 2013-03-21 02:00:00 UTC Link to this

Hi there! Welcome to the Board! You'll find it a fun, friendly, and f... welcoming place!
Please have this one (1) Fluffy Wambler. Originally native to the Dwarf Fortress continuum, it's sweet and adorable anywhere.
See you around the Board!

Re: Hello! Is newbie here. by Blu on 2013-03-20 20:49:00 UTC Link to this

Hello! Take this flask of Bleepka.
*takes swig*

Welome! by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-20 04:03:00 UTC Link to this

Welcome to the PPC! Hmmm, Mario, Zelda, Star Wars and Star Trek. Interesting combination of fandoms. I also share that combination (sans Zelda, and my favorite Star Trek is VOY), as well as quite a few other sci-fi and RPG fandoms.

As for the obligatory gift...
*rummages through Pokemon-Trainer-issue bag of holding*
*mumbling* phaser? No, already has one...
*rummages*
*mumbling* Beheeyem plushie? No, not a Pokemon fan...
*rummages*
Aha!
...have this urple lightsaber! Just don't stare at it too much!

Enjoy the insanity!

Re: Welome! by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-20 05:56:00 UTC Link to this

Yay! Something to dual-wield with my gren one! :3

(You forgot Metroid in that list btw... -_- )

Here, have an army of miniature ED-209's as a way of saying, "thank you".

*looks back at list* by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-20 15:57:00 UTC Link to this

Oops. How did I miss that?

And thanks for the mini ED-209s. RoboCop fandom, right?

Re: *looks back at list* by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-20 17:12:00 UTC Link to this

I dunno...and yes.

Welcome! by Lynne Lloyd on 2013-03-19 21:44:00 UTC Link to this

Hey there! Have a random eclair! Hooray for new friends!

Re: Welcome! by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-19 21:47:00 UTC Link to this

Have a random philly cheesesteak in return! Hooray for food and new friends! :3

Hey! Listen! by Myrddin on 2013-03-18 23:22:00 UTC Link to this

Welcome! I see we have several fandoms in common Mario, Zelda (it's a long story involving sad possessions in storage a lot, but I've yet to be able to play the latest of this series, so please no spoilers for it, if it's not too much to ask!), Star Wars, Star Trek, and even some historical fiction!

As a welcome, I have for you, a message from Saria, a bottled fairy, which may or may not be a certain someone *whistles innocently* and a baby oliphaunt!

Re: Hey! Listen! by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-19 00:04:00 UTC Link to this

Trust me, you don't want to play Skyward Sword. The controls simply suck. Twilight Princess isn't much better control wise, but it's at least playable and good. Otherwise, just play some of the Metroid games, particularly Prime.

*places the bottled fairy next to the talking Sergeant Hartman plushie*

*feeds the cute little oliphaunt*

*opens the message from Saria* I wonder what it says. :3

Re: Hey! Listen! by Myrddin on 2013-03-19 01:24:00 UTC Link to this

I didn't find Twilight Princess' controls that bad. *shrugs* Guess I'll have to see how Skyward Sword goes if I can ever rescue it from storage!

*points to the "rescue from storage" above* Same goes for the Metroid games, I'll have to give them a try if/when I can get to my equipment!

In my opinion... by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-19 05:36:00 UTC Link to this

...Skyward Sword is the finest Zelda title up to date, surpassing even Ocarina in my list. The story, the level design, and the love and care that has been poured into the game make it stand tall amongst its sister titles.

Definitely try the Prime trilogy and Super Metroid (via the Virtual Console) if you can get your hands on them. Also, the Prime theme is just too awesome to pass up on.

Re: In my opinion... by Myrddin on 2013-03-21 16:21:00 UTC Link to this

Well that's great to hear! *looks even more sadly at stuffs in storage* I'll cross my fingers that the controls are more of an issue of getting used to than truly atrocious. Hopefully I'll be able to get to it soon. ^^

Ooo, that's a great theme! I will definitely have to check the series out. I'm not sure why I haven't yet, I know it's got a huge fan following, so they have to be doing something right with it, but it's never popped up on "must play" radar for some reason...

Hm, how to describe Metroid... by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-22 04:07:00 UTC Link to this

Well, I would say it's like you take Super Mario Bros.' platforming and cross it over with The Legend of Zelda's exploration and added a ton of goodies to find all over the map. The games tend to be really good speedrun material, Super Metroid has a pretty awesome soundtrack too.

Re: Hm, how to describe Metroid... by Myrddin on 2013-03-22 18:09:00 UTC Link to this

Aaaahhhhhhhhh!!! How has not one of my friends ever recommended this before now?! This sounds like a spectacular series! I will defiantly look it up once my equipment is free again. Love the music too. :D

Re: In my opinion... by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-19 21:49:00 UTC Link to this

Watch the Angry Joe review of Steel Battalion: Heavy Armor and you have my list of complaints against Skyward Sword. I loved the care and attention to detail, even though it slightly rehashes all the stuff we've seen before. But the controls are absolutely ...ed up to being nigh-on unplayable.

Hello! by World-Jumper on 2013-03-18 23:17:00 UTC Link to this

Sorry I was late, real life has decided to bit me in the bum and I have not been as diligent as I should have been. Anyway, welcome! In this board, you may find many weird things, as you have already seen. We are insane, but the good insane, so it's cool. As I gift, I give thee...the dark crystal thing from Twilight Princess that turns Link into a wolf. All you need is a holy weapon to cleanse the darkness, and you are all set!

Actually, because I am curious, what Wiki Walk led you to the PPC? I know you find just about everything on that site at some point, I just find it curious what other people's paths were.

Re: Hello! by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-18 23:59:00 UTC Link to this

Oddly enough, I pathed here through a Fanfic Recs page. The Portal 2 one if I'm not mistaken.

*places the crystal in the Infinite Armory* I'll need to find that holy weapon right quick.

Welcome, welcome! by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-18 17:03:00 UTC Link to this

From your fandoms list, I see we share the fandom of Star Trek. As that is my primary fandom, I feel obligated to ask certain questions.

1. Which series are you familiar with?

2. Which are your favorites?

My answers are that I have seen a fair chunk of TOS (it's hard to judge, since I watched it sporadically and out of order), all of TNG, all of Voyager, and I just started DS9. Of these, TNG is my favorite, followed closely by Voyager.

Since you seem to be collecting weapons, have a generic Star Trek phaser - it changes shape depending on the series you're in and whether you want a regular phaser or a badass phaser rifle.

Re: Welcome, welcome! by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-18 17:18:00 UTC Link to this

1.) TNG mostly, I've watched DS9 all the way through and I'm working on TOS. I've never managed to catch Voyager in syndication, EVER.

2.) TNG and DS9 definitely. I loved them both. Yes, they had two completely different premises, but both were well played and I fell in love with both crews quite easily. DS9 felt more story-driven and we didn't get so much of the "seek out new life and new civilizations" TNG had, but it worked regardless. TNG, on the other hand, seemed like the perfect reboot of the adventurous romping around the original series had.

*takes deep breath*

Thanks for the phaser. :) It's getting mighty hard to find these things without having to portal into the goodfic and steal a few.

In return, here, have a generic Star Trek tricorder - it changes shape and detection capabilities depending on what series you happen to be in at the moment.

Re: Hello! Is newbie here. by Pauline07 on 2013-03-18 15:54:00 UTC Link to this

Hello! Welcome to the board!
From second newest newbie to newest newbie, it is my duty to present you with the torch. Carry it well, my friend, and don't forget to pass it on to the next new guy or girl.
From that point...
Do you have a fandom list? I want your welcome gift to be something that you'll like...instead of throwing it a closet with all the ugly shirts and well meaning presents really bad gifters give every year.

Re: Hello! Is newbie here. by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-18 17:10:00 UTC Link to this

Fandoms: Metroid, Mario, Zelda, Star Wars, Star Trek, and historical fiction. I'm also a car guy, if that counts as a "fandom"...

*takes the torch* I quite like shirts, I have a collection of them.

Re: Hello! Is newbie here. by Pauline07 on 2013-03-18 17:30:00 UTC Link to this

Alright....I can work with that...
Here's your one-of-a-kind blank Mario Kart! Ready to turn into your favorite kart in the game as soon as you hold it. It will also grow, if you ask it to.
Oh, and here are the keys....just drive responsibly...
I'm sure you do, I just meant the really gaudy ones...oh shut up, Pauline! Sorry, somewhat socially awkward!

Re: Hello! Is newbie here. by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-18 18:19:00 UTC Link to this

*huggle*

Social awkwardness is considered normal where I come from. :D

Another troper by Antigone68104 on 2013-03-18 14:01:00 UTC Link to this

Hi, have some fudge!

Nom nom nom by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-18 17:06:00 UTC Link to this

:3 Have some lasagna in return! :D

Huh, I found the PPC with TV Tropes too. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-18 08:16:00 UTC Link to this

But anyhow, a gift from teh Specs:

A pair of Quick Boots!

Winged boots; speed increase by 25%. Sprinting enabled; can increase jump distance when at full running power. Useful for fleeing from some of the more, "I'd-rather-not-fight-this-guy" Sues.

Re: Huh, I found the PPC with TV Tropes too. by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-18 16:55:00 UTC Link to this

Do they also increase how fast my feet move? I'm less of a runner and more of a car guy myself, and I've been looking for a reliable way of moving between the pedals in a heartbeat for ages now. Or do I need Parkour Boots for that?

That depends on your Stamina. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-18 18:28:00 UTC Link to this

5% increase per level, see.

Hey Newbie~! by Karen on 2013-03-18 04:44:00 UTC Link to this

Great to have you! Here, take a cookie! Take several! Just scratch off the burnt glittery bits.

Re: Hey Newbie~! by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-18 04:48:00 UTC Link to this

*adds cookies to the Infinite Armory, throws you the access codes*

You may have one of the following in return:
-Universal Vehicle Key Fob
-Snot-Shot 2000 w/ Extended Magazines

Hello, Joseph! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-18 04:26:00 UTC Link to this

Welcome to the Board! I'm KittyNoodles, and as a welcome gift I have placed one box of bleepnerds and an Odd Container in your inventory! Enjoy!

Odd Container
Item Level 1
Chance on Opening: Receive one spray of confetti or one huggle - your choice.
[This container is perfectly spherical and appears to have been crafted from glite-painted wood. Its weight changes at odd intervals, and you can't shake the feeling that opening it may proof hazardous to your health if you are unwary.]

...Ignore that last part, the flavor text hates me...

Re: Hello, Joseph! by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-18 04:48:00 UTC Link to this

And my gratitude has placed a set of keys to the Infinite Armory and a Snot-Shot 2000 in your inventory.

Snot-Shot 2000
Weapon Level 10
This goo gun can be used to set up bridges, glue shit together, and setup traps. Also useful in puzzle solving thanks to its elastic properties.
On Primary Fire: Fire a blob of sticky green goo attached to the muzzle of the gun via a slimy strand.
On Secondary Fire: Fire a slightly larger blob of sticky green goo without following strand.

This weapon has the following attachments:
-Extended Magazines

This weapon has the following stats:
-DMG (|---------)
-RoF (--|-------)
-ACC (-----|----)
-MAGAZINE SIZE: 10 shots (Extended Magazines: +5 shots)

Awesome. XD (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-18 06:59:00 UTC Link to this

Good to have you a-Board! by doctorlit on 2013-03-18 03:58:00 UTC Link to this

Greetings, new friend! Have a wacky, waving, inflatable arm-flailing tube person! (They're not all men, after all!)

Re: Good to have you a-Board! by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-18 04:02:00 UTC Link to this

Thanks! This and the Festivity Gauntlet I was given earlier will help tremendously in my Harlem Shake video!

*tosses you a Betamax copy of said video*

Hello there! by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-18 03:02:00 UTC Link to this

Welcome to the Board! Have some of my world-famous hydrophobic water to commemorate the event. Drink it once, get superpowers... probably.

Aha! Another Metroid/Zelda fan! Let me add a scale model of Samus' gunship and a smashable clay pot to your pile of gifts.

Feel free to talk about your prospective agents, but keep in mind you need official Permission before writing any PPC stuff. Be sure to read the entire wiki article!

Re: Hello there! by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-18 03:19:00 UTC Link to this

I was starting to think I was the last Metroid and Zelda fan out there with the lack of readership on my goodfic.

Hey, thanks for the hydrophobic water. It, the scale model and the smashable clay pot are the next entries in the Infinite Armory.

Hello! by darklordaakmal on 2013-03-18 02:57:00 UTC Link to this

Allow me to offer you a virtual cymbal, accompanied with a cymbalist, to shock you out of your trance when reading TVTropes. As for your introduction, you may open up as much as you want according to your taste. In other words, you're good.

Re: Hello! by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-18 03:31:00 UTC Link to this

And let me accept your offer of a cymbalist, while at the same time offering you a Universal Key Fob! It will allow you to commandeer any vehicle you come across, from a Ford Mondeo, to a Corvette ZR1, to an F-35 jet, to the Starship Enterprise. Should you commandeer another vehicle, or reset the Fob, the vehicle will magically return to the spot you took it from, and any odometers will be rolled back to their previous settings.

A useful gift. by darklordaakmal on 2013-03-18 13:36:00 UTC Link to this

Useful, because I can use it as a bargaining chip. Thanks a million.

"Hey bro, buy me some garlic. Here's the Fob, you can play with it after you drop the garlic here."

But considering the fact that horses, elephants, buffaloes, and camels are also vehicles...

"Mwahahaha!!! Puny mortals, bow before Hannibal incarnate!", as I rampage with my 24-elephant power chariot through Kota Kinabalu.

Re: A useful gift. by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-18 16:58:00 UTC Link to this

That 24-elephant power chariot sounds awesome.

Greetings, newbie! by Khaosity on 2013-03-18 02:35:00 UTC Link to this

Glad to have you here! As a welcome gift, you get some Bleep'n'ms (Bleeprin and m'n'ms, helps when reading badfic) and an Unspecified Plushie, which turns into your favorite character! Have you read the Constitution yet? Also, it would be nice if you could tell us what your fandoms are :-)

Re: Greetings, newbie! by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-18 02:38:00 UTC Link to this

The plushie just turned into Sgt. Hartman from Full Metal Jacket, is that a good or a bad thing? It just threatened to unscrew my head and shit down my neck if I didn't un... myself.

Yes, I have read it. Bookmarked too so I can refer back to it if needed.

Thanks for the Bleeprin. I'll go put that in the Infinite Armory now. :)

Fandoms: Metroid, Mario, Zelda, Star Wars, Star Trek, and historical fiction.

Should I also describe my agents here?

No, not yet. by Outhra on 2013-03-18 03:01:00 UTC Link to this

Don't bring up your agents yet. You'll need to have a presence on the Board first, and then ask for Permission. Your agent profiles should be part of the Permission request. It gives you more time to work on them that way, and besides, it helps if what you want presented is all in one place. Check the Permission page on the Wikia site for further questions; the admins have made a very comprehensive FAQ.

Before I forget, welcome! If only you'd come an hour and a half earlier; then we'd have had two shiny newbies within a twenty-four hour period. It wouldn't have been a rare and spectacular occurrence for the ages, but I think it would've been interesting.

However, that shouldn't stop you from celebrating, so I am happy to present the Festivity Gauntlet! Bright lights, dance-worthy music and/or confetti can all emerge from this device with simple command gestures! Great for getting a party started or for surprising and flash-blinding pursuing enemies! And of course, one could always turn into the other. A truly lively evening can be unpredictable.

Re: No, not yet. by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-18 03:24:00 UTC Link to this

Hey, thanks for the gauntlet. To the Infinite Armory with it!

Speaking of which, as thanks for all the great gifts, do you or any of your agents need ammo for your weapons? I've got infinite ammo of every kind, shape and form. Just reach inside the Infinite Armory and take what you need.

Wow. A space-warped pocket dimension, full of sweet loot. by Outhra on 2013-03-18 03:46:00 UTC Link to this

You might want to keep it on the down-low that you've got this much free ammunition, or the centaur that runs the PPC General Access Armory is going to be showing up at your door pretty angry, and I'm willing to bet that he'll have at least two Agents of the biggest species he can find with him, bribed with discounts on his top-shelf items.

With that said, there aren't many places where I can get this many power cells for my assorted sci-fi weapons, so I'll just take a few cases of those and abscond before I hear the hooves of a competitive market clip-clopping behind me.

Re: Wow. A space-warped pocket dimension, full of sweet loot. by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-18 03:50:00 UTC Link to this

There's no discount better than free everything every time. :D *loads my trusty Snot-Shot 2000 and waits*

Beta Request. by Bryn on 2013-03-18 03:56:00 UTC Link to this

I've been working on a Greek style Tragedy for the past few months, and I've finally finished the first act. It comes in at about 15k words, written double-space. This the first major story I've finished since "Jenny's Adventure" when I was eight.

While Riese has been a fine muse, we both agree we need someone a little more sharp fanged and nit-pick happy when it comes to Betaing. It's original fic, but anyone with knowledge of ancient greece, and greek mythos would be greatly appreciated.

But, as it is original fic, my largest plea for help is in the SPaG department. I guess just reply to this, or email me and I'll connect you to the google document.

Many thanks,

Bryn.

Also requesting a beta (Discworld 'fic) by Huinesoron on 2013-03-19 17:08:00 UTC Link to this

(Sorry, Bryn, but I'm stealing some of your thread... mwahaha etc)

I've just completed a Canon Protection Initiative-related Discworld story after about eight months work (and eight years since I first started it...), and I am in need of a beta or three. It needs someone to go over canon details, SPG, and general writing style and entertainment value.

The whole thing is about 16 chapters long, and is actually all written; however, I don't intend to dump the whole thing at once on either betas or readers (the only person I'd do that to is Kaitlyn!).

So essentially, what I need is someone/s willing to be a constant beta, who checks one chapter, and after I make any changes and post it, is ready for the next one. I'm imagining (in my funny little head) getting a chapter out every couple of days - time will tell if that's even feasible.

Any takers? Please to leave emails here or to contact at address above.

hS

I know Discworld pretty well. by the Irish Samurai on 2013-03-19 19:58:00 UTC Link to this

And as it happens, I've not got much on at the moment, so I could handle something of that size.

My e-mail is samurai_ireland@hotmail.com

That would be fantastic. by Huinesoron on 2013-03-22 08:52:00 UTC Link to this

Did you get the email I sent?

hS

Yup, received your e-mail... by the Irish Samurai on 2013-03-22 12:22:00 UTC Link to this

... and started looking at it (I must say, I'm already looking forward to reading the rest of it).

I should be able to send my comments over later today.

Sure, why not. by Desdendelle on 2013-03-18 17:43:00 UTC Link to this

I know the Greek mythology well, and I'd love to beta a tragedy. I even have a friend who knows Greek tragedies quite well, and he might be able to help/be peanut gallery. Mail is sur DOT nhm AT gmail DOT com.

Ooh, I would love to beta it! by World-Jumper on 2013-03-18 17:01:00 UTC Link to this

Greek-style tragedy? Excellent. It has been a while since I read a good modern tragedy emulating the great Greek plays before them. The email is tds3ak AT yahoo.com.

Fun fact, the romans tried to replicate the Greek tragedies only BIGGER and better. To say they missed the mark is an understatement. They got their stories so complex and convoluted, one of the gods had to descend from the heavens to fix it up. The god would be lowered onto the stage in a machine, and 'god in the machine' translated into latin is Dues ex Machina. Just found that interesting.

Re: Beta Request. by Pauline07 on 2013-03-18 16:16:00 UTC Link to this

I'd be happy to read it, Bryn, but I don't think I know greek history enough to beta it, nor am I nitpicky enough with errors. I can look for some blatant things and check for the general pacing, if you want? I've got a fairly good sense for pacing.

Well... by Karen on 2013-03-18 04:45:00 UTC Link to this

I know a bit about Greek mythology myself. If you want more eyes taking a look, I'd be happy to give it a glance.

I'd be interested, if someone as shiny as I am could do so. by Outhra on 2013-03-18 04:18:00 UTC Link to this

I don't know if recent arrivals are allowed to be beta readers, but I know a lot about Greek mythology, and I will certainly nit-pick when shown disagreeable SPaG. I'm not too experienced with the actual culture of ancient Greece, so you might need somebody else to check those parts over, but I'd be able to look over the rest of it.

Sure! The more eyes the better. Email me so I can add you? (nm) by Bryn on 2013-03-18 04:29:00 UTC Link to this

Since I don't know your e-mail address, I'll put in mine. by Outhra on 2013-03-19 15:38:00 UTC Link to this

I saw how Desdenelle phrased his e-mail address, and now I'm not sure if his way was Board policy or if he was just being quirky. Now I'm all paranoid about it. I'm going to phrase mine like that just in case.
mutran863 AT SYMBOL yahoo DOT com
There. Now if I've inadvertently embarrassed myself, I at least can explain why I did so.

Quick Question by Karen on 2013-03-18 05:52:00 UTC Link to this

I've been looking back over the Board, and in the month since I popped up again, I haven't really done much commenting on people's posts. This is partly because, most of the time, I don't know what in the world's going on and I don't want to ruin it, but should I try to be more active than I've been?

Been doing much the same thing by Bausiren on 2013-03-20 19:48:00 UTC Link to this

I wouldn't worry too much; I'm the newest of newbies, but I'd hypothesize that just doing what you feel comfortable with is the best scheme. Familiarize yourself with what's going on, crack a few jokes- and NEVER, EVER, listen to newbies.
-Bausiren

It's somewhat complicated? by VixenMage on 2013-03-18 20:07:00 UTC Link to this

Be as active as you feel comfortable being - there's nothing wrong with hanging back, nor with jumping forward.

(Am I actually capable of giving anyone a straight yes or no answer? Apparently not!)

But VixenMage, haven't you heard? by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-19 01:18:00 UTC Link to this

Board activity is a very complex system of physical judgement and-

Yeah, I can't even force myself to finish that one.

Oh my by Karen on 2013-03-19 01:53:00 UTC Link to this

Physical judgement? :O

Physical judgment? by Silken Dawn on 2013-03-21 02:04:00 UTC Link to this

Is that like spatial awareness/judgment of distances? Or do you mean corporal punishment? Or physical reenactments of Phoenix Wright-esque courtroom drama?

I'm so full of it... by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-19 01:58:00 UTC Link to this

There's no judgement involved, it's just a matter of saying things.

My, the Board is certainly full of saying things. (nm) by Silken Dawn on 2013-03-21 02:05:00 UTC Link to this

-whaps- by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-19 13:44:00 UTC Link to this

Don't scare people like that, you scamp!

Definitely! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-18 07:00:00 UTC Link to this

At the very least, do what I did and ask lots of questions! (Seriously, does anyone know how many times I apologized for asking things?)

It's always rather fun (for me) to jump head-first into things you know little about! (And it can help to read the initial post of a thread to find out what's being discussed.) :D

Haha but... by Karen on 2013-03-19 01:51:00 UTC Link to this

...if I jump head-first into things, I'll probably do something stupid and offend someone. Or that's what I'm worried I'll do.

A reasonable fear. by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-19 03:53:00 UTC Link to this

And easily avoided: If you think something you've said might hurt someone's feelings, don't post it. Simple! :D

Heh. by Karen on 2013-03-19 04:25:00 UTC Link to this

Yeah, but what if I act like an idiot or just plain say something stupid?

Then you're as human as the rest of us are! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-19 13:18:00 UTC Link to this

Trust me, pretty much my first week(s) here I messed up a handful of different times - put pages on the Wiki under the wrong categories, accidentally ventured close/into flaming territory when someone discovered a slew of Mulan badfics, and generally acted like the rampaging newbie I was. The worst I ever got was a reminder or two to reign things in - I was way harder on myself than I think everyone else was. ^^;

If you goof, you goof - what better way to learn, am I right?

Ehe I guess by Karen on 2013-03-19 16:03:00 UTC Link to this

Thanks ^_^ I feel better.

Anytime! ^^ (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-20 21:07:00 UTC Link to this

No worries! by Tray-Gnome on 2013-03-19 05:42:00 UTC Link to this

Everybody makes mistakes from time to time! It's all part of the learning process. And believe me, the PPC is a very tolerant bunch. I mean, they've been puttin' up with me for nearly three years now!

'Ello! by Cobalt on 2013-03-19 01:25:00 UTC Link to this

Hey everyone, I forgot how I got here, but oh well, here I am now! I've spent the last few days poking around the wiki and reading the Original Series, and I decided it was about time to say hi! Super excited to get to know everyone here! c:

Greetings. by darklordaakmal on 2013-03-22 06:33:00 UTC Link to this

I'm short on virtual cash to give, so accept this humble, virtual shaft of bamboo which found me on my way to the city. It glomps the head quite roughly, so be careful. And don't saw it; you won't find any babies in there.

Salutaions! by Myrddin on 2013-03-21 16:15:00 UTC Link to this

So I'm a few days late. ^^; But still, welcome, welcome!

I see we share fandoms in both Pokemon and Zelda! :D So I would like to present you with a little planter full of bitter herbs and a crate of milk from the exotic Lon Lon Ranch to get you started here!

Ooh, nice color name! by Silken Dawn on 2013-03-21 02:13:00 UTC Link to this

Hi there, and welcome to the Board! We're glad to have you!
Please have this one (1) Fluffy Wambler. It's native to the Dwarf Fortress continuum, but ridiculously adorable anywhere.
See you around the Board!

New Pokemon fan! by son_of_heaven176 on 2013-03-20 04:30:00 UTC Link to this

Hello and welcome to the PPC!
Yay, a fellow Pokemon fan!

Hmmm, what to give...

*looks through fandom list; sees "Avatar"*

Aha!

(SFX: running, car speeding away, silence for about 10 minutes, car speeding back, car alarm chirping, more running)

*panting* Here...you...go...
*opens Poke Ball*
Meet Avatar the Hitmonchan, packing Vacuum Wave, Hidden Power Water, Bulldoze, and Fire Punch. (I know, I know, Vacuum Wave is a Fighting-type attack, but Hitmonchan does not know any Flying-type moves!)

*gives Poke Ball* Welcome to the PPC!

Re: 'Ello! by Joseph Stuewe on 2013-03-20 03:06:00 UTC Link to this

Welcome. As the now-second-newest recruit, I pass you the torch. Keep it lit and keep it safe, and pass it onto the next newbie just as I am doing now to you. :)

I also pass you a Universal Key Fob or a Snot-Shot 2000...your choice! :3

Hey! by Lynne Lloyd on 2013-03-19 21:49:00 UTC Link to this

Welcome, welcome, welcome! Have a big, fluffy, urple pillow. It's fun to throw it at things!
(All these new people, I'm not feeling very new anymore! What's it been, two months since I showed up?)

Welcome! by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-19 17:26:00 UTC Link to this

*checks your fandoms list*

Ah, Harry Potter and Sherlock! Fun. Since I give newbies gifts related to fandoms we share, I gift you with a cobalt-blue deerstalker. Wear it well.

Enthusiastic pun based upon the word "Board"! by Outhra on 2013-03-19 15:18:00 UTC Link to this

Hello there! Another Zelda fan, I see! In that case, take a Gust Jar! It's great for putting out the fires after your comrades get flamethrower-crazy from a badfic overdose! Failing that, you could always use it to shoot an octorok at them. Getting hit with a large cephalopod would make just about anyone rethink their recent actions!

Welcome, welcome! by Rina on 2013-03-19 05:56:00 UTC Link to this

Here some rock-hard muffins! (you can't eat it but you can throw it)

Good to have you a-Board! by doctorlit on 2013-03-19 05:51:00 UTC Link to this

Greetings, new friend! Have a Sacred Sword!

Oi! by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-19 05:44:00 UTC Link to this

Welcome to the Board! Have some of my world-famous hydrophobic water to commemorate the event. Now approved as a cure for zerg infestation!

Ooh, Pokémon fan. Have an Eevee! With a little luck, it might evolve into Sylveon one of these days...

'Alloooo by Karen on 2013-03-19 04:29:00 UTC Link to this

Have a cookie! Have ten!

Hello, hello! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-19 04:05:00 UTC Link to this

Welcome to the Board! I'm KittyNoodles, and as a welcome gift I have placed one box of bleepnerds and an Odd Container in your inventory! Enjoy!

Odd Container
Item Level 1
Chance on Opening: Receive one spray of confetti or one huggle - your choice.
[This container is perfectly spherical and appears to have been crafted from glite-painted wood. Its weight changes at odd intervals, and you can't shake the feeling that opening it may proof hazardous to your health if you are unwary.]

...Ignore that last part, the flavor text hates me...

Oh hai there! by HerrWozzeck on 2013-03-19 03:20:00 UTC Link to this

Welcome to the PPC! We love newbies here, so make yourself at home!

As a welcome gift, I'll even give you some music by one Pierre Boulez: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7JIAVneYYoM

Re: 'Ello! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-19 02:48:00 UTC Link to this

Hello! Welcome to the board!
(digs around bag) Well, I completely forgot this was in here! Would you like some Bleeprin frozen yogurt? It will also magically take on your favorite flavor once you get it!

Greetings! by Khaosity on 2013-03-19 02:01:00 UTC Link to this

We're excited to get to know you, too. Here, have some Bleep'n'ms (Bleeprin and m'n'ms, good against badfic) and an Unspecified Plushie, which transforms into your favorite character! By the way, what are your fandoms?

Re: Greetings! by Cobalt on 2013-03-19 02:10:00 UTC Link to this

Thank you! Fandoms, hm...Harry Potter, Hetalia, Pokemon, Zelda, A:TLA, Sherlock...probably forgetting a few but that's the most of 'em.

Re: Greetings! by Anonymous on 2013-03-19 02:09:00 UTC Link to this

Thank you! Fandoms, hm...Harry Potter, Hetalia, Pokemon, Zelda, A:TLA, Sherlock...probably forgetting a few but that's the most of 'em.

Buona Sera (aaand I fudged that up, I just know it.) by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-19 01:49:00 UTC Link to this

Have a gift from teh Specs:

A Redundant Attack pendant!

Slows you to attack enemies while attacking enemies, however that works.

You just said "good evening". by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-23 14:20:00 UTC Link to this

Also, welcome to the Board Cobalt!

SC's calling for a group MST! by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-19 01:47:00 UTC Link to this

I know, I know, it's like I'm obsessed with this stuff, bit it's fun! And if nothing else, it lets me blow off some stream while I'm working on my bigger projects, because otherwise I can't write anything and just get all twitchy and - it's bad, let's just say.

Anyhow, so I'd like to make a call for a group effort, because the last time one happened, it was fun and the results were absolutely hilarious.

Step one, of course, is finding a good fic that everybody can put a streak in riffing. Last time, it was a Doctor Who fic (which later led to a Specs and Co. MST of the same author), and almost everybody knew how to respond to the topic. If not, everybody went after the comically bad writing. In the end, somebody had something to say about something else.

So, if you're interested in signing on, and have a good fic idea, I'm all ears.

Calling it here - join-ups full by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-19 15:57:00 UTC Link to this

So, all spots I'm allowing are taken, as of now.

I still can't do much without emails, of course, but if we're waiting until friday to do this, I am perfectly fine with waiting, since I'm in a crappy service zone anyhow and GDocs probably won't work where I am.

On that note, I'll catch back up with you guys on Friday!

Hm, guess I missed it... by DawnFire on 2013-03-23 15:18:00 UTC Link to this

Oh well. My internet's pretty spotty right now anyway.

How did it go? When do we get to read it?

~DF

Well, that depends. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-24 01:12:00 UTC Link to this

We haven't started, because I'm still short a fee emails, and nobody has come to a definite fic conclusion.

I said in my email that I'd start and let the late guys pop in later, but until I get some idea of what people are really set on MSTing, instead of several different opinions on several different fics, this thing might end up being in limbo.

Which I hope isn't the case - I hate when I start something and it falls out from under me, personally.

My e-mail if I did not miss out already. by World-Jumper on 2013-03-23 02:29:00 UTC Link to this

tds3ak@yahoo.com

I hope I posted on time, sinse you said this was hapening Friday.

Plenty of time. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-23 03:36:00 UTC Link to this

I'm still a couple hours out from my nearest wifi zone, so no worries.

Email by Rina on 2013-03-22 03:56:00 UTC Link to this

Rina: sydneygirl09@yahoo.com

Got it. (nm) by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-23 03:37:00 UTC Link to this

Waiting list? Also: Suggestion by Silken Dawn on 2013-03-21 02:21:00 UTC Link to this

Can you pencil me in on a waiting list? If it's too many agents, though, I understand.
Also, I'd like to suggest Agony in Pink, the Power Rangers torturefic. That thing's legendary. Someone printed it out and brought it to my middle school at LEAST ten years ago, so it's the only fanfiction I've ever held in my hands. Not for the squeamish, obviously.

Can do. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-21 06:29:00 UTC Link to this

Better to be Crazy Prepared rather than understaffed, or something.

I'm not the best with the story of Power Rangers, but given the penis of every single series they've ever made, I'm pretty sure I could keep up with the action, so I'll keep it in mind.

Having it be seconded is a good buffer as well.

Ew... You held a badfic IN YOUR HANDS? I feel sorry for you.

...Why did nobody call me on that? by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-23 03:39:00 UTC Link to this

Seriously, my phone auto-corrects premis to penis, and NOBODY SAYS A THING TO ME?

HA HA YOU SAID "PENIS" ! by Khaosity on 2013-03-23 12:24:00 UTC Link to this

Is that OK? :-)
...mother"duck"ing phones...

Seconded! by Khaosity on 2013-03-21 02:43:00 UTC Link to this

Agony in Pink must die!

I would love to join! by Rina on 2013-03-19 05:51:00 UTC Link to this

Hello! It's been awhile.

Joining sounds fun. May I.. er, join? :)

I did say, "all are welcome". by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-19 06:27:00 UTC Link to this

Which, by the way, is a catholic hymn, fun fact.

That's great then! by Rina on 2013-03-19 14:41:00 UTC Link to this

Oh? I didn't know that.

(Right. I fail as a Catholic.)

I'm in. by Ivan the Not-so-Terrible on 2013-03-19 04:39:00 UTC Link to this

I've got a Potterverse badfic, but it's kinda huge.

Okay. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-19 05:04:00 UTC Link to this

We'll holds off on that Potterverse one if we think it's too huge for this.

Email by Ivan the Not-so-Terrible on 2013-03-24 06:17:00 UTC Link to this

It's uzl2s@hotmail.com

Status update by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-19 04:33:00 UTC Link to this

Signed on:

SC
Jumper
Pretzel
Pauline
Khaosity (?)
Karen (?)

Fic ideas:

Half Life: Full Life Consequences
My Diary
A Percy Jackson badfic
A Silmarillion badfic

If I missed anything, let me know.

Update 2 by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-19 05:07:00 UTC Link to this

Add Ivan to the list.

We're also going to need to come to a decision on the fic at some point, just to point that out.

I'm in for it! by Pretzel on 2013-03-19 03:47:00 UTC Link to this

Would this be an agent!Boarder MST, just a Boarder!MST, or one involving our agents?

Whichever you choose. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-19 04:17:00 UTC Link to this

There was no preference in the last one, I'm not making one now.

All right, cool. (nm) by Pretzel on 2013-03-19 04:26:00 UTC Link to this

Shure, I'm in. by World-Jumper on 2013-03-19 03:12:00 UTC Link to this

If you all are accepting, I think Daughter of Time would be a good fic to MST. Link here: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8738702/1/Daughter-Of-Time

It is a Percy Jackson badfic that is... bad. Really bad. Unfortunately, the spelling seems to be good, so no making fun of that. The grammar and storyline is all bad though, so thats good.

If not that, then why not do a classic: Half Life: Full Life Consequences. That is a fic ripe for the MST theater, no matter how many times it is made fun of.

Finally, my last suggestion is a little unusual. Mel Brooks once said, paraphrased: "It's easy to make fun of a bad fic, it's difficult to make fun of a good one." Therefore, for the challenge, I suggest we do a goodfic. Perhaps Better Living through Science and Ponies, or The Man With No Name from Doctor Who/Firefly. I can understand why you may not want to do that, but that is just a suggestion.

To your suggestion... by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-19 03:39:00 UTC Link to this

I think it's seen universally as kind of weird to go after a fic that isn't bad. I could certainly try it, but if I'm being completely honest, I'm not sure how it would work out.

Also, have you seen the youtube video for that Half Life fic?

The better question is who HASENT seen that video. by World-Jumper on 2013-03-19 04:04:00 UTC Link to this

It is fantastic, on so many levels. Today is a good day to do what has to be done by me.

Yeah, I understand why it might be weird. I only threw it out there as a suggestion because I think I'm going to try it. Fallout Equestria I think, but I am not sure... Still, you want to go with badfic, do so. Just a thought.

I'll stick with badfic for now. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-19 04:20:00 UTC Link to this

And keep the goodfic idea for further inspection later.

Re: SC's calling for a group MST! by Pauline07 on 2013-03-19 02:43:00 UTC Link to this

Hmm.....sounds interesting....could I participate, since I'm rather fresh out of the box?
As for suggestions....I found this on The Pit the other day. Not sure at all if it's long enough, and it's not even done yet...but it's pretty bad.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8994675/2/My-Diary

All participants are welcome. by Anonymous on 2013-03-19 02:52:00 UTC Link to this

And the fic length usually doesn't matter, since MSTing it tends to lengthen the whole thing anyhow.

As will as the fact that some fics I've seen MSTed aren't complete either, so that's fine.

...Said AnonymousSC. (nm) by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-19 02:52:00 UTC Link to this

Re: ...Said AnonymousSC. by Pauline07 on 2013-03-19 04:10:00 UTC Link to this

Then definitely, I'd love to participate!

How would we be doing this? by Khaosity on 2013-03-19 02:31:00 UTC Link to this

As in, on the board, by email, carrier pigeons, or something even weirder? Cause I'd definitely like to participate, depending on whether my phone lets me or not. Not everybody knows the Canon, so we probably won't use it, but I recently read a Silmarillion fic that really needs to be sporked. It was Maedhros/Sauron slash (what is this, I don't even...) with descriptions like "their trees were rubbing against each other" or "he felt Taniquetil pushing against his opening". Taniquetil is a freakin' MOUNTAIN! Bad mental image right there... *shudders* If you want to use it anyway, I'll go find that fic again. I still know which site it's on, but I'm not about to go digging for it unless something good comes out of it...

I covered this one. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-19 02:50:00 UTC Link to this

As I said, I'm planning on doing this on GDocs.

I know how crazy mobile GDocs can be, so if it doesn't work for you, that's okay.

Wait, what was that about Sauron and a mountain?

Ah, OK... by Khaosity on 2013-03-19 12:07:00 UTC Link to this

I'll try anyway! Email should hereby be added. The bit with the mountain...well, that was one of many weird euphemisms for the penis. For example, "tree" is used quite often, as is "elfiness", and I believe there was a reference to "Sauron's dark tower" (no, not Barad-Dur, the -um- other one :-S) in there somewhere. One would think poor Maedhros suffered enough during his captivity without "towers" being shoved up him...

One more note. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-19 02:09:00 UTC Link to this

Emails are necessary as well, as this is being hosted on GDocs.

I've input mine to start with.

...Okay, NOW I've posted my email. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-19 02:21:00 UTC Link to this

Derp.

Interesting by Karen on 2013-03-19 01:50:00 UTC Link to this

Could you give me a few more details about what people would be doing? And how?

'Kay. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-19 01:55:00 UTC Link to this

As you are likely aware, an MST is a form of commentary where readers interject their opinions in the middle of the story, as taken from the style of Mystery Science Theater 3000, for which this type of writing was named.

Done with one person, it's often times motte like an in-depth review of the story, but with groups it's akin to watching it in a theater and commenting over it.

Your job would be simply that - comment on a segment of writing where you deem appropriate. Wit is always welcome of course.

Example:

"omg! I screemd as voldimoret casd hiz spel"

SC: Because text speak is totally appropriate for a wizard duel between yourself and the dark lord, right?

Sounds fun! by Karen on 2013-03-19 04:31:00 UTC Link to this

I'd be interested, then. What kind of program are you going to use for making the MST - Google doc?

GDocs. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-19 04:38:00 UTC Link to this

It's the most multi-user friendly.

And most likely to be known to everyone. (nm) by Karen on 2013-03-19 16:04:00 UTC Link to this

Ugh, I hate this by Pauline07 on 2013-03-19 06:00:00 UTC Link to this

You know when you're looking up reviews on your writing, and all of sudden you realize one of them spelled a bunch of words wrong? It's like, "Dude, glad you loved my fic...don't really think it's a great source here, though. Just saying. SPELL-CHECK!"
I'm pretty sure the site I mostly use does have spell-check for reviews, so this is just annoying...

I love it when... by Lily Winterwood on 2013-03-27 00:27:00 UTC Link to this

the fanbrats that my fic IAHF is specifically targeted at review the fic squealing about how much they love the story in the most immature way possible.

I suspect this is the same for all other OFUs out there.

It can be worse. by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-24 19:00:00 UTC Link to this

What about receiving reviews praising your fic... from people whose fics are so awful you actually considered sporking them?

It happened to me, and it left me with a really weird feeling.

I also received twice a review saying just "cool story". And the review's author has, according to the profile, 1300+ favorite stories and 1500+ favourite authors.

... Which makes me think, is it actually possible to real all those fics, or are they just trying to bait people to their profile and fics?

Exactly! by Bausiren on 2013-03-20 05:08:00 UTC Link to this

Quite! I mean, when you spend a week writing something, then get something back similar to "omg luv this" it's not exactly encouraging. Lol. Just stay in there.

I know how it goes. by Karen on 2013-03-19 16:09:00 UTC Link to this

That's a pretty common sentiment. Sometimes you just get reviewers who don't bother to spellcheck, or they're on a phone and can't spell right, etc.

I don't know about the phone thing... by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-19 16:42:00 UTC Link to this

I do a lot of my Board stuff from my Kindle Touch, where the Internet is flaky and the keyboard needs to be used like a phone. Yes, you do make more typos on something like that, but all you have to do is read back through and check anything you don't know. So I don't really accept "I'm on my phone!" as an excuse for bad spelling.

Then again, I'm one of those rare people who is a naturally good speller, so I'm more able to not rely on spellcheck.

How big is the keyboard on that, though? by Tray-Gnome on 2013-03-20 14:41:00 UTC Link to this

I don't know about you, but my phone's keyboard is 4.5x2 centimetres. It can take upwards of ten minutes to type out a 3-paragraph message, even without correcting spelling. Which, if I'm on my phone, is usually more time than I have anyways.

Fair point... by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-20 17:57:00 UTC Link to this

The keyboard is bigger. But I still don't think a phone is an excuse for being sloppy. Reviews don't even need to be given right after you read something - you can always wait until you have access to a regular computer.

However, if the SPaG is off but the review is still insightful, that's okay.

Might I inquire.... by Karen on 2013-03-20 22:18:00 UTC Link to this

Do you think the reviewer's intent counts? As in, someone who just wants to let the author know they like the story, as opposed to someone who's trying to leave concrit? I could excuse bad SPaG from the former, personally, because they're not trying to offer advice.

I suppose. by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-21 01:47:00 UTC Link to this

It sort of undermines any advice they're trying to give. And of course I will accept a review with bad SPaG. However, I prefer when the person takes the time to tell me what they liked about it, even if they aren't giving concrit. It serves a similar function to concrit, because it helps me to do better if I know what I'm doing right.

Yeah, that is helpful. (nm) by Karen on 2013-03-21 15:30:00 UTC Link to this

Not sure what to think about these. by Ellipsis Flood on 2013-03-19 11:03:00 UTC Link to this

There's just something in overly badly spelled reviews that screams "not really caring." Aka I feel like these are most likely blind fan reviews, that praise you for vague things and overlook all the things you failed at. Aka ~90% of the reviews on FFN.

Fanfiction is free entertainment. by darklordaakmal on 2013-03-19 11:14:00 UTC Link to this

And people are usually happy at whatever free things they get. Unless it is diseased. Thus the lackadaisal(?) attitude in reviewing.

Lackadaisical, I believe :-) by Khaosity on 2013-03-19 12:17:00 UTC Link to this

I'd still rather have one review that said "Pretty good in all, but you've got issues here and in this other bit," than ten or even a hundred that are just "OMG u rok draycoo is so hott!!!11!". But to each their own. *shrugs*

I got a review like that three weeks ago... by Rina on 2013-03-19 14:54:00 UTC Link to this

It wasn't fun. She was asking me to put yaoi in the fic where I, specifically told them that there would be none of those things. I didn't know how to respond to that review.

Re: Ugh, I hate this by Pauline07 on 2013-03-19 06:24:00 UTC Link to this

Then again, "all feedback is good feedback". But when spell-check is available, not doing it is just lazy.

Heh. Not quite. by VixenMage on 2013-03-19 17:23:00 UTC Link to this

Ask a published author about that sentiment sometime - if you're getting flaming reviews from nasty, mean spirited jerks who just have a problem with you, I don't recommend taking it to heart. Likewise, blind praise is less than helpful. Everything in between? Honestly, take it with a grain of salt. Listen, yes, and evaluate their criticism. But you don't have to let reviews like that bother you.

This. by Ellipsis Flood on 2013-03-20 12:48:00 UTC Link to this

Don't blindly listen to your reviewers. Personally, I know that "this is the best thing eva" is most likely an overstatement, just like "stop writing you dumbbutt." And if you're not sure about a point someone made, ask someone whose judgement you trust.

Re: Ugh, I hate this by Pauline07 on 2013-03-19 07:02:00 UTC Link to this

I mean, I can't say the reviewers are bad, because they took the time to read it and all...I need to think before I type...

Such inner musings... by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-19 07:56:00 UTC Link to this

Are probably more suited for a private blog, or some such, I think.

But yes, I totally agree.

Agent mailbox game by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-19 08:44:00 UTC Link to this

I’ve been toying with this idea for some time and I just wanted to give it a spin to see where it will take us. I believe that Sergio Turbo and Huinesoron suggested doing agent mailboxes a while ago during the closing ceremonies of the 2012 badfic game so full credit goes to them for thinking this up.

The concept is pretty simple: we just send questions to an agent’s inbox and watch ~~their author~~ them answer. Queries can range from what they think about their partner to their tastes or funny anecdotes to where they like to eat lunch. Naturally, having agents take questions from the PPC Board makes this AU material.

I was thinking the format could be something like this:

This post

*Agent X's mailbox (nm)
>Question
>>Agent's answer
>Question
>>Agent's answer

*Agent Y's mailbox (nm)
>Question
>>Agent's answer
>Question
>>Agent's answer
etc...

Any takers? I don't want to start this right now just in case this needs to be tweaked or moved to the Other Board or something...

Mailbox Game by Bausiren on 2013-03-20 02:36:00 UTC Link to this

This should DEFINITELY be interesting. Cookie, anyone?

Cookie! Yum! by DawnFire on 2013-03-23 15:16:00 UTC Link to this

...I think I might be starting to see why Karen and I really get along so well...

~DawnFire

Hm... Well... by HerrWozzeck on 2013-03-20 02:21:00 UTC Link to this

I think it would be interesting. I'll be pretty busy soon enough, but I think it could be interesting.

Sure. Sign me up.

Happy to play... by DawnFire on 2013-03-19 23:58:00 UTC Link to this

...when I have internet, anyway (seriously, you go on a three-day trip, you miss everything), but no one really knows my agents yet. Well, Karen knows one of them, but that's another story. I don't think that would mean I can't play, but I am wondering if anyone would even really ask questions...?

~DawnFire

Now on the Other Board! by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-19 19:44:00 UTC Link to this

Click here for a link to the thread!

Obviously partecipating. by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-19 19:17:00 UTC Link to this

It's not like I cna launch the idea and then disappear, right? (Especially since I wanted to partecipate)

I'd love to play! by ShatteredSanity on 2013-03-19 18:49:00 UTC Link to this

When does it start?

Sounds cool, I'd be up for this. (nm) by the Irish Samurai on 2013-03-19 17:50:00 UTC Link to this

Sure, why not? by Desdendelle on 2013-03-19 17:31:00 UTC Link to this

It looks like a fun thing, plus it'll probably help me further characterise my Agents. I'm in.

Agreed, this could be great for character-building. by Neshomeh on 2013-03-19 17:54:00 UTC Link to this

I might have to break out the D&D Character Questionnaire I've had sitting around for ages. There are 100+ questions (I'm guessing, since they aren't numbered), and most of them can apply to any fictional character.

~Neshomeh

Ooh, I want that. by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-19 21:35:00 UTC Link to this

I read the 100 questions thing they made for Madoka Magica (with the title character answering it), and I wanted to do such a thing since then.

(I couldn't re-use that one's questions because they were made for a Japanese middle schooler, and so too many questions don't apply to my Agents).

I'd be up for this (nm) by Phobos on 2013-03-19 17:24:00 UTC Link to this

My agents have no missions yet, but... by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-19 17:15:00 UTC Link to this

...if anyone wants to ask Agent Tanya Verde anything, she's open. It'll give me some good practice with her character (I mean, she's my self-insert, but she's me in a different scenario with a traumatic backstory.) You can find her bio here.

Sounds fun to me (nm) by firemagic on 2013-03-19 16:59:00 UTC Link to this

I'd force my agents (and ex-agents) to reply. by Huinesoron on 2013-03-19 16:59:00 UTC Link to this

I don't think I'd have any questions, though...

I also suspect that it might be easier to have a layout more like this:

Top post

>BoarderName1's Agents' Mailbox (nm)
>>Question(s) for BN1's Agent1
>>>Answer(s) to the above
>>Question(s) for BN1's Agent2 and Agent3
>>>Answer(s) to the above
>>Another question for BN1's Agent1
>>>Answer to the above

Etc etc. It would save people like, well, me having to post twenty+ mailboxes only to have no one ask anything to them... the mailbox itself could even list the names of BN1's agents, instead of being a (nm).

hS

So, are we going to start a thread like that? (nm) by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-19 17:19:00 UTC Link to this

I'd play. {= ) by Neshomeh on 2013-03-19 16:35:00 UTC Link to this

Of course, you can't expect good answers from certain up-tight people I write for... ^_~

~Neshomeh

Good =/= Friendly by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-19 17:18:00 UTC Link to this

I believe you made that distinction on said agent's wiki page. I'm sure his answers will be awesome.

That just makes it more fun to ask. (nm) by Karen on 2013-03-19 16:42:00 UTC Link to this

That looks like fun! by Karen on 2013-03-19 16:11:00 UTC Link to this

You should make this happen.

Ooh, sounds cool. by World-Jumper on 2013-03-19 15:27:00 UTC Link to this

Yeah, I'm down, though Marvin and Printworthy so far have had no missions. I need to get onto that... Anyway, yeah, sure, I think it would be fun. The format looks fine, and I'm always up for a little roleplay.

Ooohhh, now I wish I had Permission. by Outhra on 2013-03-19 14:51:00 UTC Link to this

This looks like it would be lots of fun! Unfortunately, I don't have any published Agents to take part in it...

I guess I'll have to just submit questions, then! Will we have to send those to the agent's writer personally, or just post it on the Board in a designated topic and hope that they get to it?

I'd say either the Board, or the Other Board. by Cyba Zero on 2013-03-19 15:33:00 UTC Link to this

The Other Board being here: http://disc.yourwebapps.com/Indices/241484.html

This sounds like fun... by Cyba Zero on 2013-03-19 09:37:00 UTC Link to this

I'm happy to let my agents in for this!

Seconded! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-19 13:14:00 UTC Link to this

This might just give me the motivation I need to finally finish that Warriors mission! :D

On making characters and agents in this continuum. by darklordaakmal on 2013-03-19 11:37:00 UTC Link to this

Does all characters we make in the PPC has to be Agents? I intend to make Darklordaakmal more of a supplier of stuffs, with a small army of manufacturing orcs, that his only purpose in the PPC continuum is to provide textile or other supplies to interested PPC agents. He lives in World-One-As-The-Seventh-Age universe. He also will interact a lot with agents, or to his own orcs, or other characters. In short, my own fictional world, but bound to PPC.

Has this been done before? Is it seen favourably? Can he be sporked, if he is seen as too Stu-ly? And do I need a Permission to craft this character?

Clothing! by Bausiren on 2013-03-20 20:56:00 UTC Link to this

Yep, you do need permission for this! Sounds like a neat idea, though. Would this be a free-use character (such as Makes-Things)?

Maybe not. Maybe yes. by darklordaakmal on 2013-03-21 01:33:00 UTC Link to this

But first I need to craft the Permission Request and get it. But I think I may have to make this character free-use, just because I can't write every purchase fic every week. How does free-use characters work anyway?

Pretty much how you'd expect. by Huinesoron on 2013-03-21 10:21:00 UTC Link to this

You write the character, or just their description, declare them free-use, and then they're free for anyone to use. So anyone is allowed to write Makes-Things, say, or the Sunflower Official - but you can't go about writing other people's agents without getting their permission.

hS

More answers! by Neshomeh on 2013-03-19 17:03:00 UTC Link to this

First of all, yes, you would need Permission for this. That goes for anything intended to be added to the PPC shared universe, whether it's an agent or not. The main point of the Permission process is to make sure that anyone who wants to write about the PPC is a good writer and that their characters aren't Sueish enough to deserve sporking.

Second, no, not every PPC character is an agent. Since you're checking into the wiki, I recommend looking up the "PPC Staff" and "Civilians in HQ" categories for examples. And, like Kitty said, it wouldn't be the first time a more-or-less-freelance operative set up shop in HQ—see particularly "Leto Haven" and "General Store."

Personally, I've always wondered where PPC agents get new clothes when their old ones are glitter-stained and tattered beyond repair, so I would be interested to hear more about your idea. I'm sure some of them steal stuff while on missions, but they can't all do that all the time, or someone would surely notice. Plus, some people (*cough*Nume*cough*) have very particular standards for themselves, and probably can't find what they're looking for in a badfic.

~Neshomeh

Clothing, armour, and crafts. by darklordaakmal on 2013-03-19 18:03:00 UTC Link to this

Clothing: Jeans, trousers, shirts, T-shirts, jogging pants, sarong, blouse, pants. 70% cotton, 20% ShelobSilk, 10% asbestos.

Armour: Gambesons, Padded trousers, Heavy mittens, maille made from steel, Lorica Segmentata made from plastic pails, and cotton paddings, sarong(made-up), Mongol leather-silk armour made from leather and 100% ShelobSilk. Unless stated, 80% ShelobSilk, 20% cotton. Fireproof version: 70% ShelobSilk, 20% asbestos, 10% cotton.

Crafts: Tablecloth, oven mittens, etc.

Based on order. Specify colour, size, and fireproof or not, or you'll only get whites. Even the leather, heheheh.

On Darklordaakmal:

He was a 17-year-old who stumbled upon an sick Orckid when he was out fishing with his friends. He met the Orc Chieftain, who then asked his help on various things. 5 years later after serving him, the Orc Chieftain, along with three allied chieftains, raised raised him as their Dark Lord, with sworn duties to help the Orcs rise to new prosperity and delay the return of Morgoth, if he could.

Now at the head of 500-odd orcs, Darklordaakmal tries to maintain order, improve their social standing, and generally tries to find other Darklords around Sabah, in order to decide whther to ensure the orcs remain hidden, or to introduce them to society.

So, this guy will be 22 now.

I had listed what he will sell, but since Darklordaakmal is young, he may need feedback. He is working based on the previous Darklord's ideas, who died of old age around 1990. So, he is green in the business world. He's just a normal human, and he works more like a diplomat-manager-treasurer than an Orcus on His Throne, to qoute the Tvtropes. In short, inspired by a feudal lord's duties, if he isn't being an absentee lord.

Anything else?

There's asbestos clothing? by Karen on 2013-03-20 02:01:00 UTC Link to this

Haha I'm tempted to say you should make clothing out of 100% asbestos because why not.

Not sure many agents would be suicidal enough to wear this. (nm) by Ellipsis Flood on 2013-03-20 12:59:00 UTC Link to this

It itches. (nm) by darklordaakmal on 2013-03-20 05:29:00 UTC Link to this

Still. (nm) by Karen on 2013-03-20 16:49:00 UTC Link to this

Hmm... by Karen on 2013-03-19 16:15:00 UTC Link to this

I don't know about you needing Permission, or how others view the idea, but I personally think that'd be a very interesting character. Most of what is written about the PPC (which I just accidentally misspelled as PCP XP) is missions about badfics. A look into the mundane parts of the PPC could be fun!

Well... by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-19 13:43:00 UTC Link to this

I don't know about most of this - I may not be very shiny anymore, but I am still pretty new. I do know that PPC characters do NOT have to be field agents. There are loads of infrastructure departments that deal with the more 'mundane' aspects of the organization; to quote the Wiki, 'The Infrastructure Departments are those that keep the PPC running.'

Departments from this category include - but aren't limited to - the Department of Dead Author Electricity Generation (which powers the PPC by using the electricity created when dead authors roll in their graves due to badfic) and the Department of Finance (which deals with financial stuff like income, overhead, etc.)

Also, I've encountered a few stories - missions and intermissions - where there were agents or side characters running their own little shops within HQ, so there's that, too.

I wish I could've been more helpful, but that's about the extent of my knowledge here...

This help is helping. by darklordaakmal on 2013-03-19 14:33:00 UTC Link to this

Although not quite helpful. I'm looking into the Wiki now, hope i could be enlightened more.

Sorry. by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-19 15:26:00 UTC Link to this

Non-action departments are not my strong suit, sadly...

Had been looking into PPC wiki just now. by darklordaakmal on 2013-03-19 16:42:00 UTC Link to this

And I discovered that there are shopowners in PPC universe. One is a weaponsmith, and another is a pharmacist. There isn't an armourer that I found, so Darklordaakmal can be an armourer/boutique. Although there won't be any fashionable clothes there.

I may need to look in deeper. May be there is a need for Permission. If there is, time to fill in the Permission Self-Check.

Some points to ponder. by Huinesoron on 2013-03-19 16:54:00 UTC Link to this

1/ If you are writing stories in the PPC shared universe, you need permission. So yes, this would (and the Self-Check is a very useful tool for that).

2/ The original shop in PPC HQ was Leto's General Store. I don't know about the weaponsmith or the pharmacist, but I believe you. ;) There is also an armoury, in the sense of supplier of weapons - someone who supplies armour I've not heard of, so you could be onto something. Supplying the stuff agents wear around HQ could also be handy (I'm picturing a shop entirely filled with second-hand jeans...)

3/ One reason most PPC characters are Action agents is that, well, they're more fun to write. Writing a story about John Callahan, Fitter of Jeans - and making it exciting to read and write - would be a pretty difficult task. Most Infrastructure agents (which is the technical term for what you're proposing) who have stories written about them tend to end up drafted into Action work.

(3.5/ That said, I have a burning desire to write a dramatic tale of accountancy in the face of adversity for the Department of Finance. Ah, someday...)

4/ Are you aware that your English use is somewhat, er, off? In this thread you've said things like 'I may need to look in deeper', or 'Does all characters we make in the PPC has to be Agents' - those would more typically be rendered 'I may need to investigate further' and 'Do all characters[...] have to be agents'.

hS

Hey, not always! by VixenMage on 2013-03-19 17:27:00 UTC Link to this

I know field agents are more fun to write for a lot of people, but I got bored every time I tried to write a mission. Plenty of us have a lot more fun on the sidelines!

I know My English is a bit off. by darklordaakmal on 2013-03-19 17:26:00 UTC Link to this

4/ Which is why I'm joining the PPC in the first place. So that people will correct me if I'm wrong, or alienly speaking, like what you just did. I want to write a novel, which by now is just jottings here and there, and having a community that corrects me freely is quite an asset. I still need to pay attention on what I write though, sometimes old mistakes just keep on resurfacing.

3/ I wanted to write a character that is in the sidelines, hearing awesome tales around him everyday, but having his own set of problems and adventures himself. Which may be pretty boring for those in the thick of action, but still quite entertaining to the reader.

2/ I did had a role-play on the other day. I accepted an order of fireproof gloves, gambesons, sarongs, and other articles of clothing. It was made of spidersilk from the Spawn of Shelob. My orcs were mostly knitters, to support their own measly income from the lack of opportunity to raid the modern world. The adventures could be looking for new spiders, orcs' emergencies, maintaining the lair where the clothes were knit, etc.etc.

1/ After having filled the Permission Self-Check, who am I supposed to deliver it to? I didn't see any email the other day I looked at it.

Though, that speech type could differentiate the character. by Outhra on 2013-03-19 19:32:00 UTC Link to this

(The title is messy, phrasing-wise, but I've still not gotten the hang of the character limitations in the titles of the Board's posts.)

I don't know if this comment would be counter-productive for helping you deal with the parts of your speech that genuinely are or could be interpreted as mistakes, but I think that having an, as you said, "alienly" speech pattern could be a good distinguishing characteristic for Aakmal.
It speaks to his history as someone who's a little foreign to his surroundings, which I think is an interesting angle. A lot of PPC recruits spend approximately fifteen minutes taking in "Wow, I guess this place really is nothing like home." and then settle into patterns of speech and behavior similar to the rest of the organization. It's not a bad thing, necessarily, when you consider the way that one's own speech patterns might adapt when immersed in accents, phraseologies, and terms that were formerly never experienced, but I've noticed it in most of the missions I've read, and it might be interesting to see a new take on it.
Someone who was raised in a distinctly different setting from the technologically saturated and dimension-hopping world of HQ, speaking a different language, and behaving and thinking in a way separate from others that he interacts with can be a springboard for an interesting character, and nothing drives home that difference more in a written medium than the way that his dialogue is constructed.
Just a thought. Feel free to discard or accept as much of it as you want. In fact, I think I went on about it for a little longer than I should have as it was.

This next part isn't related to the previous idea, but I was wanting to ask about it. How high and low would the sizes go with the clothing? How many body types would the clothing-maker orcs service?
I ask because general human(oid)-fit shops probably wouldn't work for Agents with unusual physiologies, and those Agents would probably need repairs or replacements after a couple of missions traversing the multitude of worlds and having their clothes ripped up fighting Sues. Add that to the fact that some of the more heavily-built species would more likely have more protection of the biological sort and inadvertently might not take as good care of their clothing and armor as they could, and you'd have steady business supplying them.

Usually cater to humanoid body shape. by darklordaakmal on 2013-03-19 19:58:00 UTC Link to this

But since it is based on orders, there may be some wriggle rooms. I heard about an agent who is a dragon, and Elven body may be bigger than humans, and we may have to fit dragons or minis too. This will be an interesting story to ponder, as Darklordaakmal tries to fulfill his customers' orders. which is why I entertain this idea for some time.

For now, we only cater to human body types, and sizes go from S to XXXL. The culture shock when we enter PPC, and having to cater to weird body types, is part of what I want to tell about when writing this story later.

Re: I know My English is a bit off. by Ellipsis Flood on 2013-03-19 17:46:00 UTC Link to this

IV] Good luck, then. But beware, writing a novel takes lots of resources (time and patience being two of them).

III] Eeeh, it can work. See hS and VM's responses.

II] "I did had..." should be "I had..."

I] It's a Self-Check. You don't deliver it to anyone. You just look at how well you could answer these questions.

On Self-Check. by darklordaakmal on 2013-03-19 17:48:00 UTC Link to this

Should I double-check it with someone else? I believe I should.

You can, if I remember right. by Neshomeh on 2013-03-19 18:09:00 UTC Link to this

There's a Submit button at the end of the form, and that should send it to a place where hS or somebody can look at your answers. I say hS because he's the one who set it up. I don't know who else has access at this point.

The thing is, though, if you aren't confident in your answers, that may be a sign you aren't ready yet. Some of the questions have more than one good answer, or no really good answer, so it's a test of how comfortable you are with the reasons why an answer might be good or bad as much as it is of solid PPC canon and writing knowledge.

~Neshomeh

Good. by darklordaakmal on 2013-03-19 18:21:00 UTC Link to this

I'll go find the Self-Check now. I may need to stew over it for some time, before sending the answer. I make my Golden Rule never to be sure of anything, so knowing that it can be sent to Huinesoron is a good thing to know.

I probably missed something... by Karen on 2013-03-19 23:30:00 UTC Link to this

...but what's this Self-Check?

The Permission Self-Check. by DawnFire on 2013-03-20 00:02:00 UTC Link to this

I believe it's linked in the Permission article on the wiki. I'd put a direct link here, but my internet's not being very cooperative right now. It's quite easy to find, though. (And if you can't find it, or you're feeling lazy, I'm sure someone with a good internet connection will be happy to link you).

~DF

Ohhhh by Karen on 2013-03-20 01:05:00 UTC Link to this

Permission Self-Check. Huh. I will check.

The PPC Agent mailbox by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-19 19:43:00 UTC Link to this

As discussed on the main Board, this is an AU game in which we get to have a Q&A session with some of our favourite PPC agents.

We'll be using Huinesoron's amended mailbox style for this game, meaning that the format is now like this...

Top post (this one)

>BoarderName1's Agents' Mailbox (nm)
>>Question(s) for BN1's Agent1
>>>Answer(s) to the above
>>Question(s) for BN1's Agent2 and Agent3
>>>Answer(s) to the above
>>Another question for BN1's Agent1
>>>Answer to the above

...in order to avoid stretching the thread to infinity and beyond.

Have fun!

Lily Winterwood's Agents' Mailbox by Lily Winterwood on 2013-03-27 00:28:00 UTC Link to this

That's Christianne Shieh and Eledhwen Elerossiel (DMS).

Questions for both agents: by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-27 12:53:00 UTC Link to this

What is the closest scrape you've ever been in?

How would you describe your partner?

What is your favourite pairing, be it canon or fanon?

If you had a choice between a Japanese restaurant and an Italian restaurant, where would you eat?

You wouldn't have happened to have seen Agent Harris Frost anywhere, would you? He was last seen running away with Agent Beydoun's Glaceon towards the Escher room. It's a long story.

Re: Questions by Lily Winterwood on 2013-04-04 20:25:00 UTC Link to this

What is the closest scrape you've ever been in?
E: There was a vampire Sue that bit me once, and I was near the threshold of death.
C: And there was this other time when we landed on the bad side of Marley. It's all fixed now, though, after Marley nearly destroyed the console with his venom.

How would you describe your partner?
C: Neat freak.
E: Slob.
C: Oi! You're the one who arranges clothing by rainbow order!
E: How in all of Arda can you live with the mess you're in? Your half of the RC is worse than the dungeons of Barad-dur in its filth!
C: It's actually not that messy. I've seen much worse. And since when have you seen the dungeons of Barad-dur?
E: Since - long story.

What is your favourite pairing, be it canon or fanon?
E: Sherlock Holmes and John Watson, if they are not being possessed by Sue-wraiths.

If you had a choice between a Japanese restaurant and an Italian restaurant, where would you eat?
C: Well, we know for certain there's a Sue-free Japanese restaurant in this Multiverse, so I'd go with Japanese.

You wouldn't have happened to have seen Agent Harris Frost anywhere, would you? He was last seen running away with Agent Beydoun's Glaceon towards the Escher room. It's a long story.
C: Oh, wasn't he the one who tried drowning HQ?
E: I hear he was only trying to prove the existence of Atlantis, which coincidentally sounds much like Numen -
C: Wouldn't be surprised if they were the same. Now, um, no, I don't think I've seen him recently.
E: Check the room with the TARDISes.

ShatteredSanity's Agents' Mailbox (nm) by ShatteredSanity on 2013-03-21 21:49:00 UTC Link to this

Random questions. by Neshomeh on 2013-03-24 19:49:00 UTC Link to this

5.1.2.1.1. What makes you cry?

5.1.2.1.2. What makes you laugh?

5.1.2.2. What's your favorite curse word?

~Neshomeh

Antigone's Agents Mailbox by Antigone68104 on 2013-03-21 17:53:00 UTC Link to this

Intern Lynn Gillies, Agent Arthur Briggs, both in the DMS (Freelance), RC 8345.

Random questions. by Neshomeh on 2013-03-24 19:45:00 UTC Link to this

5.1. Where do you call home?

5.1.1.1. Where do you feel safe?

5.1.1.2. What sort of place spooks you?

5.1.1.3. Are there any places you refuse to go? If so, where?

~Neshomeh

Agents Caroline Moor and Veralyn Amberwing's mailbox (nm) by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-20 21:06:00 UTC Link to this

Question for Caroline by Cyba Zero on 2013-03-22 11:26:00 UTC Link to this

Has your mini-Discord, Flutteryshy, ever met Q?

In fact, have you seen a mini-Colossus wandering around anywhere near your RC? Joke's been exploring HQ a few times since the pillow-fight incident, and I'm concerned he (and Mess Efekt) might be trying to get ideas from the perpetrator...

Dear Cyba Zero: by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-22 23:39:00 UTC Link to this

No, I don't think the two have ever met - but then again, I don't always know where Flutteryshy is, so maybe they have.

I do know I've never seen any mini-Colossi wandering around near the RC. I'd notice something like that.

--Caroline

I'd like to say that she's missed bigger things than that, but for once she's right. No mini-Colossi in sight.

-- Agent Veralyn Amberwing, DMS

Question for Veralyn by Cyba Zero on 2013-03-22 11:19:00 UTC Link to this

Have you ever visited, or do you ever intend to visit, the Official Fanfiction University of Azeroth? (I would presume, of course, to help tutor or simply study the curious specimens known as 'fanbrats'.)

Cyba Zero: by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-22 23:36:00 UTC Link to this

There is an Official Fanfiction University of Azeroth? Why hasn't Caroline told me about this?

Or... maybe she has been trying to? She has mentioned an 'au revoir' or something like that, quite a few times in fact. I wonder if that has anything to do with it?

She tells me - after quite rudely reading over my shoulder - that she calls it 'ohfwa', and it is the 'correct' pronunciation of the acronym OFUA. Apparently she was talking about the university after all, and not speaking gratuitous French.

Concerning you question of whether or not I have or ever intend to visit the university: I've been told it swarms with the creators of the atrocious badfics that mangle my home continuum, and that these 'fanbrats' are to be taught through pain. I may just have to pop in for a spell and learn more about this school.

-- Agent Veralyn Amberwing, DMS

I was not reading over her shoulder. She was muttering to herself while she was writing.

--Caroline

Question for Veralyn Amberwing by ShatteredSanity on 2013-03-21 21:52:00 UTC Link to this

I understand that your home continuum has a holiday called "Pirate Day", and you have a missing eye. Have you ever considered, or actually, worn an eye patch on that day?

ShatteredSanity: by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-22 23:27:00 UTC Link to this

That is not funny.

-- Agent Veralyn Amberwing, DMS

I snuck my answer in when she wasn't looking.

I suggested it to her a few days ago, and she tried to beat me to death with a pillow. I'm guessing the answer is yes, the thought has crossed her mind.

--Caroline

Sorry by ShatteredSanity on 2013-03-22 23:55:00 UTC Link to this

Terribly sorry. It WAS kind of insensitive of me.

Think nothing of it! by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-23 00:25:00 UTC Link to this

Seriously, Veralyn's just a stinker - she probably says WAY worse stuff about me all the time!

--Caroline

Question for both. by Ellipsis Flood on 2013-03-21 09:51:00 UTC Link to this

Now what exactly was on these no-drool tapes? Characters in speedos who really shouldn't be in speedos?

Dear Demonspawn Ellipsis Flood: by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-22 23:19:00 UTC Link to this

I'm not entirely sure what all was on those tapes, but Veralyn came back shaking like a leaf and muttering under her breath. And she still has nightmares, and for some strange reason when I mentioned the discovery of the color glite she flinched and told me she'd discovered it first.

Also, sorry about the salutation there. Veralyn found the letter first. I think she just broke the pen I gave her, so ignore any ink blotches on her answer.

--Caroline

Don't ever ask me about the No-Drool Tapes again or so help me I will murder you.

-- Agent Veralyn Amberwing, DMS

((You are a bad, bad person, EF. XD))

Question for Veralyn: by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-20 21:12:00 UTC Link to this

So I've been hearing rumours that you and your partner are interested in becoming the legal guardians of a certain Orion of Cloudsdale. Is there anything you want to say on the matter?

Speaking of relationships, how goes it between you and your partner?

SeaTurtle: by KittyNoodles on 2013-03-22 23:24:00 UTC Link to this

Yes, my partner has expressed an interest in adopting the little pegasus. She hasn't stopped pestering me since the pillowfight incident.

Quite frankly, I think our Response Center is crowded enough with the two of us, Firebrand, and the evil little mini-Discord. But she seems intent on adopting Orion either way, so I suppose if I don't go along with it she'll still go out and adopt him the next time I leave the RC.

As for my relationship with Caroline... we have reached an agreement. She won't ask about the wretched tapes I was made to watch if I behave myself and 'tone down the urge to stalk Lor'themar'. And I do believe she is beginning to like him as well - though of course she has no chance with the Regent Lord.

doctorlit's agents' mailbox by doctorlit on 2013-03-20 15:21:00 UTC Link to this

For Vania and Doc, and how about Miss MacKinnon, too?

Some questions for Doc. by PPC Nursery Class 3 (Ages 5-6 std.) on 2013-03-20 16:48:00 UTC Link to this

(The children heard there was a mailbox to ask agents questions, I'm afraid they rather let it go to their heads... ~Elanor Laison, Nursery Teacher)

Is yur namm really doc?
Arr you the Docktor from the kanonn?
Wat er yuu a docter ov?
ui\e\ru\hn\iorsghhgiw

(Sorry about that last one - Elisabeth is just finding out what hands are, I'm afraid she stole the keyboard... E*L)

answer from Doc by doctorlit on 2013-03-21 06:40:00 UTC Link to this

Ugh. Vania won't let me go back to reading until I answer this mail, so . . . What the? Uh . . . Hi, kids . . .

Uh, yes and no. I think I have a real name on my birth certificate, but as long as I remember, everyone has called me Doc. I guess I just . . . look like I should be named "Doc?"

The Dockter? From what canon? I don't think I've read that novel. Who is it by?

I'm, uh. I'm not a doctor. I mean, I guess I used to repair textbooks at my high school's bookstore, but I don't know medical stuff at all.

And uh. Yeah. Just going to go back to reading now.

—Agent Doc

(The part about repairing textbooks is true, though that's not how I came up with my username.

—doctorlit)

the Irish Samurai's Agents' Mailbox by the Irish Samurai on 2013-03-20 13:13:00 UTC Link to this

RC1984, DMS Agents Skeet and Amelia.

More random questions. by Neshomeh on 2013-03-20 23:02:00 UTC Link to this

From pages 18-19:

5.4.0.0. What is your normal daily routine?

5.4.0.1. How do you feel when this routine is interrupted?

5.4.1. What are your most annoying habits?

~Neshomeh

I just read what that meanie-head Skeet wrote! by Agent Amelia Renner on 2013-03-21 22:07:00 UTC Link to this

He makes the days sound so boring! He also has no idea what the word ‘healthy’ means. With all those cooked breakfasts he eats I’m surprised he’s not spherical! I mean, they are yummy, but I don’t think I have to worry about becoming spherical because I’m more sensible than he is and only have a little breakfast.

Um, my days are mostly like Skeet’s, because he’s my partner, but I haven’t really been here long enough to think of them as ‘routine’. The missions are fun (we get to go into the stories of books and films, it’s so cool!), but I do more interesting stuff than Skeet when we’re not on a mission.

I’m still kind of new here, so I spend whenever I can exploring HQ. I’ve already found a whole bunch of stuff, including the library (which is amazing), and I’ve heard there’s supposed to be a swimming pool somewhere around here, but I haven’t found that yet.

I’m not sure that I’d really notice if a normal day got interrupted by anything, because I haven’t worked out what a ‘normal’ day is here.

I don’t have that many annoying habits (Skeet’s just being a great big mean meanie-head), but I don’t make a good first impression with other people, and that annoys me. I just go all quiet and try to hide when I meet new people, and I don’t really want to, but it’s just scary meeting new people, you know? It annoys me that I’m not better at it :(

Anyway, Skeet has loads more annoying habits than I do:
• He’s supposed to be training me, but mostly he just shows me stuff I shouldn’t be doing
• I don’t think he’s ever followed a single rule in his entire life
• And now he’s started reading this over my shoulder as I write it, which is really annoying
• He’s wrong all the time but he won’t admit it
• I’m surprised he’s even heard of the words ‘work ethic’, although maybe it’s like ‘healthy’ and he doesn’t actually know the correct meaning of it
• Gah! Now he’s trying to take the keyboard away from me klf
Hewon’tstopmefrompostingthis!!1!

Answers by Agent Skeet on 2013-03-21 22:02:00 UTC Link to this

My daily routine? Well, on a good day I’ll be woken up by my alarm, otherwise it’s the [Beep] of the console, and that’s never a pleasant thing to wake up to. Either way, the first thing I do is sort out some breakfast, and I mean a proper breakfast, none of this ‘cereal’ nonsense: eggs, bacon, sausage, beans, tomatoes, mushrooms, toast and a great big mug of tea (milk and one sugar – and no, I’m not saying who my supplier of sugar is).

By the time I’ve finished all that off I’m ready to start the day, and usually have a mission waiting, one way or the other. So then it’s on to the usual check the Intel report, check your gear, etc. (although I have now had to add another phase to that which is ‘wait for Amy to be ready too’).

I’m in the DMS, so I’ve normally got a pretty good idea what the mission’s gonna be like, it’s not like I’m in Floaters: those guys can get given anything. Sues can still throw a few surprises at you though, so the missions themselves tend to be varied, and I just have to play it by ear. Once the Sue’s dead and gone, it’s back to HQ (you’ll find me at the Bleepka Bar if it was a bad one).

After that, if there’s time, I’ll catch up my reading, do some weightlifting, or e-mail my granddad the next move in our ongoing chess game (the score currently stands at 62-0 in his favour).

How do I feel about that routine being interrupted? Well, that standard routine has developed based on the fact that my usual plan (lounge around the RC all day reading and playing computer games) always gets interrupted by a mission. If that didn’t happen, I’d probably be more confused than anything else, but I guess I’d eventually just start appreciating the break.

My annoying habits? I guess it depends on who you ask, but I don’t think there’s anything much. I’ll admit I’m not that great at turning my paperwork in on time, and Amy seems to have some issues with my work ethic or something, but that’s OK, I’m sure I remember reading something about banter between partners being good for the the partnership.

Amelia’s annoying habits on the other hand are something I can talk about at length. She plays that annoying, stupid, sped-up ‘nightcore’ in our RC instead or listening to decent music, she’s obsessed with rules and regulations – even the really ridiculous ones that are never gonna be sensible for an agent to follow in the field, I have to do all the talking to people because she’s too shy to do it herself, and I have to dose her with anti-Lustin before every mission because she fangirls over everyone. Still, I guess she’s OK for a newbie, and she did save my life that one time, so I should probably stop complaining.

- Skeet (DMS)

Ellipsis Flood's Agents' Mailbox (nm) by Ellipsis Flood on 2013-03-20 12:13:00 UTC Link to this

TooManyQuestions by Neshomeh on 2013-03-20 22:59:00 UTC Link to this

Despite the play on words in the subject line, these are for everyone. {= ) From page 13:

2.4.0. Do you have a criminal record? If so, what for?

2.5.0. When did you decide to become [a PPC agent]? Were you forced into it? Did circumstances dictate your choice of profession?

2.5.0.1. What was your occupation prior to [becoming an agent]?

~Neshomeh

Re: Mailbox questions by Greg and Julien on 2013-03-21 09:46:00 UTC Link to this

Julien:
2.4.0. No.
2.5.0. I needed to do something new. My old job had become too stressful, and I wanted to retreat from the busy world.
2.5.0.1. I was a DIC licenced MtG tournament judge. As I mentioned, it got quite stressful after a while.

Greg:
2.4.0. Yes, I tried weed. It wasn't my thing, though.
2.5.0. I thought it sounded nice. I mean, why not?
2.5.0.1. I tried a lot of things, but none of them really worked for me.

Agents Greg and Julien, MTG CARDS HERE card shop

* buying, selling and trading MtG cards
* Friday (we hope) Night (kind of) Magic tournaments
* cheap drinks

You like Magic, but haven't found any place to play? Come here, bring friends!

Priyala wanted to. by Priyala and Saline on 2013-03-21 09:33:00 UTC Link to this

2.4.0.
Saline: Dark City doesn't really have criminal records, nor does Heron City. Other than that, I never really stayed in one place for long.
Priyala: I don't remember. But I was mostly in stasis, so I don't think so.

2.5.0.
Saline: I didn't decide anything. I logicked a hole into my world and fell through. Then I found out that I was from a badfic crossover reality, which kind of sucked. And then Tom f___ing Atlairy casually sits in a bean bag with a Game Boy playing Tetris and tells me I'm obsolete.
Priyala: Orken said that I had to leave the canon, or else I'd keep warping it... and so I ended up here. I don't really know what else to say about this.

2.5.0.1.
Saline: Uh, mechanic, summoner, village snarker, token evil person? Heron City is pretty much a group of outsiders. None of us had a "job." We just did what had to be done. And we fought a giant robot once.
Priyala: Uhm... professional Sue?

PS: I think Saline is making that up.
PPS: Whatever.

Re: TooManyQuestions by Ellipsia and Nathan on 2013-03-21 09:21:00 UTC Link to this

Hi. Nathan thought this would be a good idea. :D

2.4.0.
Ellipsia: I don't think so... I hardly remember anything, but I'm a Paladin and generic BFF, so...
Nathan: No. I was kind of a square back then.

2.5.0.
Ellipsia: I didn't "decide" anything. From what other people told me, I was catatonic for a while, and they couldn't really put me back in that state, so they kept me. I read up on the PPC during server down times and waiting for groups, and somehow I didn't like the thought of others going through the same thing as me.
Nathan: Again, I have the boring answer. I came across a flyer lying around in my university. It sounded interesting... yeah, that's it. I like things that are logical, and I was kind of miffed by the average fanfic quality out there.

2.5.0.1.
Ellipsia: As said, Paladin and a Sue's generic BFF. Not that I remember much of it, outside of these dreams.
Nathan: I was a math student.

I see what you did there. by Anonymous on 2013-03-21 09:06:00 UTC Link to this

Since you have no way of reaching me otherwise, I think I can disclose some of this.

2.4.0. I used to have an entry for data fraud. Good thing that can be fixed. Other than that one time, the only ones who ever caught me were agents of the PPC, so no. My record in my home 'verse should be clear now.

2.5.0. You did pick these questions because of me. This sounds way too specific for my rather unique situation. But yes, this ties into the question above. I was caught by the PPC when I (accidentally, I may remind you, damn my sloppy handwriting) hacked into a server of DoSAT. And no, I have no idea how this works.
These two guys, Jake and Callahan, found me. The choice was either to wipe my mind and blow up the computer I used to do my work, or joining the PPC. Since I didn't have the money, or the time, to have a new gateway computer set up, and I didn't have any real ties to the world anyways, I joined.
As for my profession, I work in tech support. It's the thing that fits me most, as I'm really too squeamish to go out and hunt reality warping glitter demons.

2.5.0.1. I worked for an organization called Uplink. Since you're not allowed to interfere anywhere anyways, I can tell you that they were an organization that provided anonymous contact between hackers and their clients. Even though it didn't earn me that much money, I never went after individuals and never ruined anyone's life unless they really deserved it.

I hope this satisfies your curiosity. If you decide to disclose this to others, however, I have your IP.

HerrWozzeck's Agents' Mailbox by HerrWozzeck on 2013-03-20 02:25:00 UTC Link to this

RC 1810, DIC
Agents Florestan and Eusabius

RC 2183
Agents Anneli Rodriguez, Xanthus Garkaran, and Cinderella

Question for Florestan by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-22 02:46:00 UTC Link to this

Out of sheer curiosity, which Mass Effect 3 Extended Cut ending did you choose: red, green or blue? What was your reasoning behind that?

Easiest question in the world. by Agent Florestan on 2013-03-22 04:26:00 UTC Link to this

I ended up going with red all the way. Here's my problem with the other two:

Blue: You're just setting yourself up to be the Catalyst 2.0, and turning yourself into the Illusive Man with no reason to do so. Who would be dumb enough to do that?

Green: Well, let's set aside the fact that this ending makes no sense whatsoever and just get to the real problem here: it provides a solution that you then cram down everybody else's throats. You know, something the Reapers did to the rest of the galaxy for so many years. Yeah, I'm not going to do that to anyone else, thank you very much.

I mean, yeah, the red ending does kill every synthetic in the galaxy, but you know what? That Catalyst is a dumbass. Organics and synthetics can co-exist peacefully, especially in a galaxy which made peace with synthetics to unite against a common enemy. I think the ME galaxy would realize that, and be kinder to any artificial intelligences that would come up in the future.

So yeah. That's my reasoning behind it.

Let's not forget... by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-22 05:01:00 UTC Link to this

...it's the only ending where one very important character survives.

Short Shumann Questions for Florestan/Eusabius by Outhra on 2013-03-20 22:40:00 UTC Link to this

Exactly what species is Shumann, or if he doesn't correspond to a species, what World One creature does he closest resemble?
What is his body type(humanoid, quadruped, insect-like, etc.)?
What continuum was he found in, if you know?
Does he behave in a similar manner to other organic minis?
Are there others like him elsewhere in HQ?
How much trouble does he cause when you're out of the RC?

Oh boy... by HerrWozzeck on 2013-03-20 23:02:00 UTC Link to this

Florestan: Oh, great, someone actually cares about the mini enough to ask about it.

Eusabius: And why not? I may remind you that we have gone on several missions and most people do not know what Shumann looks like.

Florestan: It is an it! *growls* Okay, let's see...

Eusabius: *looks at first and second questions* We do not know what species Shumann is. However, if we were to pinpoint a close resemblance... it is possible to think of it as looking similar to the alien character Stitch from Lilo and Stitch.

Florestan: Well, if Stitch and a rabid dog rolled in the hay and had a baby, anyhow.

Eusabius: And now I believe Outhra has acquired some mild trauma from that mental image.

Florestan: Oh, he'll live. *looks at third question* He actually spawned because my first partner in the PPC misspelled "Schumann" in a message she sent to the Flowers once.

Eusabius: You mean to say she did not know who Robert Schumann was?

Florestan: Her, and half of America, apparently. Damn kids with their Lady Gaga.

Eusabius: As I recall, Florestan, you were listening to Nicki Minaj yourself a few hours ago. I may also mention it was not the first time you did so.

Florestan: I like how bad it is, okay!? God! Prejudice!

Eusabius: *glances calmly* I believe that now is not a pertinent time to call the kettle black, as the saying goes. *looks at the fourth question* I believe so.

Florestan: He keeps eating my bacon whenever I bring it in. Always raids my damn fridge like that, you know? *rolls eyes* But that's not the only thing. Sometimes, he'll have chewed on my bedsheets just to mess with me. And usually, I have to sleep in those damn things because I don't have time to get new ones! And oh yeah, let's not even get into how he once broke my Xbox in two while my partner and I were on a mission. I seriously didn't think you could break an Xbox that badly...

Eusabius: I do hope this answers your sixth question.

Florestan: And as for others like him? Thankfully, no, but I know the potential exists. Here's hoping we don't get a mini of Arnold Schoenberg in the near future...

Eusabius: We hope you have a pleasant day.

Question for Xanthus by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-20 03:40:00 UTC Link to this

Have you ever been to Earth in the ME-verse or in World One? If so, where? If not, do you have any intention of going there?

Agent Garkaran by HerrWozzeck on 2013-03-20 04:37:00 UTC Link to this

Agent DeGrasse,

I have not been to Earth actually, neither in the Mass Effect continuum nor in World 1. I imagine Anneli might drag me to World 1 Earth, but in that event I wouldn't mind.

But as for Mass Effect Earth... I might not go there. After all, it is currently inhabited by Reapers, and I do not think it would be a good idea to go onto a place that's kind of experiencing a massive war, right? And after the war? I dunno. With the way Mass Effect 3 is, I could wind up there with Earth destroyed, so I would rather not risk it.

--Xanthus Garkaran

Neshomeh's Agents' Mailbox by Neshomeh on 2013-03-20 00:25:00 UTC Link to this

RC #999, DIC
- Agent Supernumerary
- Agent Ilraen-Aroline-Fothergill

RC #1110, DMS
- Agent Derik
- Agent Gall Bonecrusher

FicPsych
- Nurse Jennifer Robinson
-- Her son, Henry Robinson
- Nurse Mirrad
- Nurse Elms
- Nurse Castor Parwill
- Nurse Loquacious Immac
- Intern Alex Bjørnsen

Question for Supernumerary by the Irish Samurai on 2013-03-24 13:20:00 UTC Link to this

In your opinion, what is the most dangerous foe you've ever faced?

Another one? by Agent Supernumerary on 2013-03-24 16:26:00 UTC Link to this

Dammit, you've got me thinking now. Fine... I have been up against more than my fair share of dangerous crap. The one that came closest to killing me, personally, was the ficubus, f***ing Archir the f***ing Emerald. Thing damn near did us all in, and that after outright shattering the canon.

That said... I don't think it was the most dangerous. There are fates worse than death. It's not the thing that dashed four teams of relatively seasoned agents to pieces like a ship on a rock.

A huge, dong-shaped rock...

You know what, we're done here. F*** off. Go bother my partner some more, he enjoys it.

— F***ing Agent f***ing Supernumerary

(( Sorry about that. He's into the Bleepka now for sure... ))

Question for Nurse Robinson by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-22 02:50:00 UTC Link to this

Out of all the patients you have treated, which one had the most bizzarre ailment?

I know that Agent Bulldog was admitted into FicPsych in sometime in 2003. Did you ever meet him? He's tall, black, and thought he was a house elf.

Interesting question! by Nurse Robinson on 2013-03-23 17:21:00 UTC Link to this

Sadly, answering it the way I think you're hoping for would put me in breach of confidentiality, so you're out of luck there. Sorry!

Anyway, the truth is that Dr. Freedenberg or folks with more seniority than me, like Nathonea, get all the really unusual cases—definitely all the ones outsiders have heard of, including Agent Bulldog's. That was actually a bit before my time, I think, or if I was there I was still so shiny-new (and yeah, a little glittery) that they wouldn't have trusted me with anything beyond paperwork and intern work—delivering food, changing bedsheets, kicking the Four-S, that sort of thing. If I met him, I don't recall.

I can talk about some things generally. It's actually fairly unusual for us to see a canon character, since all the field agents carry neuralyzers these days, and when we do get them it's almost always a double-whammy of injuries requiring a trip to Medical plus severe emotional trauma. Post-Traumatic Bad Slash Syndrome makes up about eight of ten canon admissions, I'd say. There's also the odd character who can't be neuralyzed the normal way, but that doesn't even make up a whole percentage point.

If you want to know the bulk of what we do, it's taking care of new recruits. We keep saying we're going to make a PSA about this, because it's actually a bit of a problem. The field agents get so keen to earn a vacation that they don't think about what they're doing, so we get these poor lost bit characters who really would have been better off assimilating with their home canon. A lot of times, we'd like to just send them back as soon as we get them, but Upstairs does insist on grist for the mill, so we're not allowed, and it sucks. The blank slates, the ones that got little to no characterization from their authors, are as helpless as newborn kittens here, they usually have no support structure beyond us, and we can't take care of them forever. Eventually we have to cut them loose, and while some of them make it and get more or less stable, lots of them don't. So, if any agents are reading this, think twice before recruiting. If you don't want to kill them, that's awesome, but that doesn't mean you should abandon them on our doorstep.

... That has nothing to do with your questions at all. I'll get off the soapbox now. Sorry.

Hey, the metafictional grapevine tells me we're due for a Romulan who thinks she's a Tribble at some point down the ol' timeline. That sounds pretty odd!

~Jenni R.

P.S. The real truth is that my author hasn't written any weird cases for me. She doesn't like to put me forward, what with my history. Also, when other people write about FicPsych, "Freedenberg" tends to be the name they use. You have no idea how frustrating it is for the rest of us to be referred to as "the nurse" all the time. We hardly know who's done what ourselves, because nobody bothers to tell us!

To Ilraen: by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-21 17:58:00 UTC Link to this
1. On the subject of your morphs, which everyone seems to be asking about, what Trekverse morph would you want to acquire?
  
  2. On the subject of Trek, it appears from your journal that you have seen a fair amount of it. Any preferences? Series, captain, etc.
  
  3. And slightly related - how do you put up with your partner?
  
  4. I know nothing about your species, but you seem to be something like a blue centaur. This might not be something you can answer, but...are you pettable? All the pictures I've seen of you, you look fuzzy and soft. Also adorable.

My goodness, so much mail. by Agent Ilraen on 2013-03-22 00:05:00 UTC Link to this

I am really not sure what to make of it, but thank you for your interest!

1. Yes, everyone does seem to be asking about my morphs. It is a fascinating subject, and something I have spent a great deal of time thinking about myself.

As for what Trekverse morph I might like to try, it is hard to choose—there are so many different species! I suspect I would get stuck being a Bolian or Andorian on a mission simply because of the "blueness" aspect, and especially considering the Andorian antennae. I would not mind that. Andorians even have some cultural similarities to Andalites, placing a high degree of importance on honor, family, etc.

Perhaps the best answer is another question: what would you recommend for a less-than-adequate morpher who does not wish to endanger anyone with a potentially harmful species?

2. Somehow, I am not surprised that journal has been found. Nothing stays secret forever in HQ, it seems. Ah well. Just bear firmly in mind that I will track you down if certain private, personal observations about certain people are wantonly blabbed about. I was not exaggerating my seriousness on that point.

To be honest, most of what I watched during that time has gone out of my head by now. I took it in under duress, and it was too much to fully absorb so quickly. (Please do not tell my partner.) However, I did like what I saw of Captain Janeway, and speaking from more recent experience, I enjoy Deep Space Nine very much. The longer story and character arcs appeal to me more than the "mission of the week" approach in the other series, though of course it does have some episodes like that and the other series do have some character growth.

I also enjoyed the "reboot" film, which has been the source of many lively discussions in my response center. By that I mean arguments. But I do not mind too much.

3. I do not wish you to think badly of my partner, but nonetheless, Agent Supernumerary is a trying individual by all accounts, even to those of us who are his friends. It seems I have been gifted with a great deal of patience, which I have expanded by practicing daily Andalite rituals. Additionally, I have spent most of my existence as his partner, so you might say that I learned how best to live with him as part of my training as a PPC agent. The key is to remember that actions speak louder than words, and not to take everything he says to heart. Much of it is hyperbolic or diversionary to some degree—he is not someone who likes to reveal his true feelings. I do not know why. I do know that he has always looked after me in his own way, and I will always do the same for him.

4. I will take this question as a compliment, but do please remember that I am a sentient, adult being. I do have fur, and it may look inviting, but it would be impolite to pet me, especially without warning. (I make exceptions for small children, who do not know any better. You would not believe the substances I have had stuck to me.)

Thank you again for your letter. This is quite fun!

Time to torture Nume! by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-20 17:24:00 UTC Link to this

Dear Nume,

Have you heard of the 'shipverse? It's Lux's home continuum and the continuum in which the Shipfic Fest takes place. If you have, then what to do you think of it?

Also, I dare you to read some of the shipfic fest.

Sincerely, A Fan

P.S. You need to cosplay as Spock sometime.

Oh, goodie. by Agent Supernumerary on 2013-03-20 18:27:00 UTC Link to this

Dear "Fan,"

Yes, nothing, and no. Why the hell does everyone find it so amusing that I have a sense of propriety?

— Agent Supernumerary

P.S. We will consider your request. Don't call us, we'll call you.

(( OOC P.P.S. Have you seen this entry for Fanfic Land, and more importantly, the response to it? *g* [Note: Phobos used to go by the screen name "Barid."] ))

((I am going to die of laughter. You are awesome. )) by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-20 21:36:00 UTC Link to this

It's amusing because sarcasm is amusing, and you turn it up to eleven when your sense of propriety is offended.

Don't ask me why sarcasm is amusing, you'll sound like Data and then I'll start fangirling over Star Trek and you really don't want that.

Yeah, please don't drool on my fandom. by Agent Supernumerary on 2013-03-20 22:37:00 UTC Link to this

Nobody wants that.

And, by the way, of course sarcasm is amusing. Why would I not get that? I'm not a moron, or an android, and I certainly don't have any hangups about just wanting to be a real boy, boo hoo, wah wah. Oh damn, I guess I forgot to turn off my emotion chip, better go angst about that now.

How's that, "Fan"? Amused? Because my sole joy in life comes from knowing that my mannerisms entertained some random person on the Internet that, God willing, I will never, ever meet face to face.

— Agent Supernumerary

(( I do enjoy entertaining random people on the Internet, so I hope that wasn't too mean. ^_^; ))

I apologize. by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-21 20:52:00 UTC Link to this

Just because you look like Spock doesn't mean you are Spock. Or his TNG equivalent.

Now, here's a question that isn't specifically designed to torture you. If you take it as such, I didn't mean to.

When did you start being this way - you know, sarcastic and abrasive and antisocial? I'm assuming you didn't start as a little kid, so was there some event, series of events that triggered it?

Good. by Agent Supernumerary on 2013-03-22 00:51:00 UTC Link to this

Those other schmoes aren't Spock, either, and don't you forget it.

... Are you seriously asking me about my personal life now? In an effort to not offend me? Jesus Chr—okay, you know what? Fine. My parents treated me rough. My father is a bastard, my ma's an S.O.B. They didn't wanna have me, but somehow I was had. It's not I'm anti-social, I'm only anti-work. Gloryosky! That's why I'm a jerk!

No, wait, those are just mixed-up lyrics from "Gee, Officer Krupke."

Give me a break. You're as bad as Jenni.

— Agent Supernumerary

Sorry, again. by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-22 14:31:00 UTC Link to this

I thought you were proud of your antisocial tendencies and that you would be willing to talk about the time you decided that we were all idiots for trying to make friends. Obviously, I misjudged your character again.

I'm going to take that comparison to Jenni as a compliment.

Now, I hope these are impersonal enough for you:

1. Which is your favorite Star Trek series? Why?

2. Who is your favorite captain? Why?

3. I am given to understand that you're not a fan of the 2009 movie. Why?

4. I am involved with the Official Fanfiction Academy of Starfleet. Can we call you when we need PPC help?

You are very persistent. by Agent Supernumerary on 2013-03-23 20:15:00 UTC Link to this

I admit, it is tempting to explain to you in excruciating detail exactly why you're an idiot for thinking that, but that's such an obvious trap I just have to do this:

Now, the next time you're tempted to bait me by appealing to my ego, you can just go push that shiny red button a few times to get a rough idea of how I'm going to respond. If you can keep that in mind, maybe with the aid of some super-glue and power tools, we might be able to have a conversation about Star Trek.

1. The original, obviously. It might not have shiny modern special effects, and yeah, Shatner is a giant cornball, but you kids just don't get what it was like at the time it was airing. Compared to pretty much everything else out there, it was the greatest thing we'd ever seen, and that sticks with you. People say the same thing about the original Doctor Who, and maybe even Lost in Space for all I know, but what Star Trek has on them is that it gives us a vision of humanity not completely at the mercy of inscrutable alien forces and/or our own petty bullshit. The Federation is humanity come up so far from almost nuking our own damn planet that we can go out and mess with them—or join forces and become equal partners for a brighter tomorrow, either way. The point is, it's not out to terrify us with the spooky unknown, possibly with the rider that our only hope and salvation is some kook with a blue box. Our hope and salvation has always been our own goddamn ingenuity and our ability to occasionally shut up about appearances and lifestyles and cooperate like f***ing adults, and that's what Star Trek is all about.

2. Tough choice—they're all pretty terrible at their job. Giving credit where it's due, Picard is the least terrible. Kirk is Kirk, but I never liked him much. Don't see the appeal.

3. Two words: character defilement. Just thinking about it pisses me off.

4. What are you, a student? Well, it's about time there was a decent Trek OFU, anyway. Sure, why not? I've answered weirder summonses. But I don't want you or anyone else glomping me, got it? Can I demand a guard of minis? You know what, I do demand it. Make sure you tell whoever's in charge over there.

— Agent Supernumerary

(( You're not an idiot. Nume is an ass, and his opinions do not necessarily reflect those of the Management. He also totally deserves to be glomped, and you have my blessing as his author. ^_~

~Neshomeh ))

*glomps* by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-24 04:26:00 UTC Link to this

I kid, I kid. Please don't turn on the sarcasm. For the record, I am in charge - I'm the author/course coordinator. You can call me Miss Gloria if you like. Certainly the minis can be arranged, though I can't guarantee a Spock mini - there aren't all that many. His name is too easy to spell.

I wholeheartedly agree, about Star Trek showing humanity overcoming its problems. TOS doesn't resonate with me as much as TNG, but that's because I didn't see it when it was cutting edge. You're lucky.

Being a TNG fan, I prefer Picard. As you so aptly put it, Shatner's a cornball. It's...quite fun to do...impressions of his...long, dramatic...pauses. Picard, on the other hand, is commanding, morally upright, intellectual, and has an awesome accent. Granted, that last isn't particularly important, other than the fact that it adds to his commanding presence.

The new movie...well, it introduced me to Star Trek, so I give it points for that. Also, any movie that has two Spocks can't be all that bad. But I'm not a fan of Spock/Uhura, and the whole movie felt very modern. Not in a good way, more in a "let's try to appeal to twenty-first century teenagers!" way. So I can understand, growing up with the original, why you'd hate it.

~Miss Gloria

((Yes, I am persistent when I want someone to like me. That glomping comment - was that just Nume being an ass, or are you picking up on the fact that I'm ever so slightly fangirly about him? Because I am. Just a bit. *coughs loudly* Anyhow. I feel like this conversation is getting really long, but I'm enjoying it so much I don't want to stop. Nume's responses always make my day.))

Not funny. by Agent Supernumerary on 2013-03-24 17:41:00 UTC Link to this

Lady, the sarcasm doesn't ever get turned off. I'd do it just to disappoint, but it can't be done. If you don't want sarcasm, don't talk to me. But equally, don't lie to me. You told me you enjoy it. I can only imagine you're getting some kind of sick masochistic pleasure out of this conversation.

It just figures you're the one in charge. God dammit. But look, who said I cared what spawned the minis? I'm not exactly wild about the things—but if I'm going to be walking into a den of drooling infant Trek fanbrats, I'm not going to risk being mistaken for a Vulcan and stampeded, that's all.

Though it galls me to admit, we do have one thing in common: Spock/Uhura can go jump in a lake. Preferably one made of acid or lava. And it can take whatever idiot thought up that whole insulting "love triangle" bullshit with it.

Also, my God, the lens flare. And the whiteness. Everything was curvy and white and shiny with blue lights. You'd think they hired Apple to design the sets.

— Agent Supernumerary

(( The glomping comment was in response to your/Gloria's comment that he's not Spock, he just looks like him. As he says above, he's aware of the resemblance and wants to take sensible precautions. Also, you did identify yourself as "a fan" to start with, and you outright told me you fangirl Nume at some point, so there's not much picking-up-on necessary on anyone's part.

I'm glad you're having fun and not being totally insulted and demoralized. ^_^;

~Neshomeh ))

Questions for Ilraen by the Irish Samurai on 2013-03-20 13:30:00 UTC Link to this

Of the morphs you've picked up so far, which one is your favourite? Are there any morphs that you particularly want to pick up?

Well... by Agent Ilraen on 2013-03-20 17:39:00 UTC Link to this

It seems I have already answered the second question in my reply to Agent Kayleigh. Perhaps that will satisfy her request to swap?

As for the first part, it comes down to a choice between my human morph and my dragonhawk morph. I am very familiar with the first and it is indispensable to me, but the second is very beautiful, and flying is great fun, even if I have not quite gotten the hang of it yet.

I suppose I will choose the dragonhawk. I spend so much time in human form that it hardly feels strange anymore. It is simply a normal part of my abnormal life.

Follow up question by the Irish Samurai on 2013-03-25 23:27:00 UTC Link to this

You say that your human form doesn't feel strange now, out of interest what was the hardest part about getting used to it? Was it simply walking on two legs instead of four, or were there social/cultural things that were more difficult to get used to?

Also, would you be able to pass on a message to your partner for me? I'd contact him myself, but given some of his recent replies, I'm not sure he'll bother reading his messages any more. Anyway, I seem to have annoyed him with my question (or maybe he's just like that all the time). By way of an apology, if he were to visit RC1984 I'm sure I could arrange a maximum of Bleeprin-laced drinks and a minimum of social interactions.

Ooh! Good question! by Agent Kayleigh on 2013-03-20 16:43:00 UTC Link to this

I like this question. I wish I'd asked it. Can we swap?

*~~~~
~*~~~
~~K~~
~~~*~
~~~~*

Sure, why not by the Irish Samurai on 2013-03-20 17:21:00 UTC Link to this

If we swap questions, do we need to swap answers too?

To Ilraen: by Agent Keyleigh on 2013-03-20 09:11:00 UTC Link to this

Wheee! Blue horsey! Do you know you're blue? I hope that doesn't mean you're sad! Also, your tail is awesome.

*~~~~
~*~~~
~~K~~
~~~*~
~~~~*

Erm... thank you? by Agent Ilraen on 2013-03-20 17:25:00 UTC Link to this

I am aware that I am blue, though I was once purple for a few seconds before my morphogenic field stabilized. Also, it is interesting to note that there is no way to be certain that we all perceive colors the same way, so perhaps what you call blue is something completely different from my understanding of the color.

In any case, I am not sad most of the time, but I do feel that way sometimes, like anyone else.

I am also not a horse most of the time, but one day I am going to ask Alice's permission to acquire her and a few others from the courtyard for a composite morph, and then we shall see who is the fastest in a fair race.

To Gall: by World-Jumper on 2013-03-20 05:21:00 UTC Link to this

We know the multiverse is full of dragon riders. My questions for you are:
1. What makes your ways of dragon riding different from those of other continuum?
2. What makes your dragon different from dragons of other continuum?
3. How do you best care for a Monstrous Nightmare, full sized or miniaturized?

And finally;
4. Have you been to, or want to go to, Skyrim?

Ever curious,
Printworthy

Well, Bobâ€” by Agent Gall on 2013-03-20 17:14:00 UTC Link to this

I can call you Bob, right? Nice ta meet ya, Bob.

The answers to your first two questions are the same: mine is more awesome. The end.

As for number three, you gotta remember our dragons took care of themselves just fine before we stopped killing each other and joined forces, so it's not like they're high-maintenance or anything. Being stuck in a building changes things, though, especially since I'm told it's frowned upon to let Snerri hunt new recruits through the halls. *evil grin*

Anyway, I gotta make sure he gets enough to eat and drink, and make him exercise so he doesn't get bored and fat. I WOULD do this by bringing him on missions with me all the time, but my partner is a real stickler for rules, so I have to play on his dead-dragon guilt to get anywhere with him, and I can only do that so much before he gets that one special look that means he's about to flip his shit and murder us all. So, yeah.

Snerri pretty much grooms himself, but that doesn't mean I can't make his sharp pointy bits extra sharp and pointy, and also shiny. You can't go wrong with shiny. Also, any dragon likes a warm place to sleep and a good scratch under the jaw. He gets along really well with Arasgorn the mini-Balrog, as you might imagine. I have to keep an eye on them so they doesn't set the response center on fire by accident, though.

Side note: don't live with dragons or mini-Balrogs if you can't stand the smell of burning. Bathing is a thing that happens, but nothing ever fully gets rid of the smell.

And finally, what the heck is a Skyrim? Are we talking about the horizon? 'Cause, y'know, there's already a word for that. (Hint: it's "horizon.")

I'm glad we had this little chat, Bob. So long, now!

DawnFire's Agents' Mailbox by DawnFire on 2013-03-20 00:20:00 UTC Link to this

(Heaven help us)

Questions can be sent here for:

Agents Brenda and Charlie of the DMS (Freelance) (First mission forthcoming...)

Agents Edgar and Agen_t of the DIC

Agent Dawn of ~~the Department of Insanity~~ the DMS (also Freelance)

(Yes, Agen_t's name is spelled correctly. That's four _s, by the way. Yes, Dawn is quite insane. Karen can confirm that. Oh, and Charlie would like to inform you all that she's female.)

(Dawn would like to inform you that you're welcome to send messages to the many mini-Balrogs that live with this assortment of agents, but I'm not sure what sort of reply you'd get. Probably not a very legible one. You can also send one to Dawn's tribble, but...again, don't count on an understandable reply.)

Questions for all! by Neshomeh on 2013-03-20 22:54:00 UTC Link to this

Again drawing randomly from the D&D Character Questionnaire, we have, from page 17:

5.2.2.2. When you wake up screaming in the middle of the night, what do you see?

5.2.2.3. Do you have any great rational or irrational fears or phobias? How do you react when they manifest themselves?

That's probably enough to start with, since you have five characters to think about. {= )

~Neshomeh

The many replies... by DawnFire on 2013-03-23 14:46:00 UTC Link to this

(As there are, indeed, so many agents, I've let them each choose one or both questions to answer.)

Suethors. I see Suethors. And Sues. Many, many Sues.

Occasionally, I see myself being forced to work with a Suetho--oh, wait.

Damn you, SO...
-Brenda

--

What do I see when I wake up screaming? Um, that really depends on where I am. I mean, if I'm on a mission, it could be anything, you know? Generally Brenda telling me to quiet down, but...

Oh, and fears or phobias? Uh...I'm afraid of Gandalf's cooking. Very, very afraid. And Miss Cam's pretty scary, too. So is Galadriel. And Elrond. As for how I react to them, I avoid Gandalf's cooking, try never to make any spelling, grammar, or canon mistakes anywhere near Miss Cam, and try not to think anything about, um, well, you don't need to know who, but I try not to think anything about him around Galadriel. As for Elrond: Nine. Nine. Nine. Nine. Nine. Nine. Nine. Nine. Nine. You get the idea.

~Charlie

--

Edgar: When I wake up screaming in the middle of the night, I see the manifestations of crossovers past.

...Well, no, I don't, but what I do see isn't really any of your business. Agen_t?

Agent: ...I don't wake up screaming in the middle of the night. At least, I don't think I ever have. *pause* Seriously, if I've woken up screaming, I'm probably being murdered, in which case I've probably been drugged or forgotten all my training. And only the first bit's a possibility.

Edgar: You're not devoloping some sort of issues, are you? I should have known the James Bond movies were a bad idea...

Agent: I liked those movies.

Edgar: (mumbles) Yeah, that's the problem.

Agent: I even managed to find some good fanfiction for them.

Edgar: You've been reading fanfic?

Agent: It's very interesting. Especially the ones about my 'home canon', as you people keep calling it.

Edgar: You've been reading Avengers-verse fanfic? No wonder you're getting issues. Don't you dare become an alcoholic, by the way. Or get PTSD. Or daddy issues.

Agen_t: I wasn't given a father.

Edgar: True. And mind you don't start angsting about it.

(DawnFire: Aaand, time's up! Next agent!)

--

Hello, and welcome to the last answer! I'm Dawn, and I'll be taking over now.

(You will?)

Oh, absotively. You should take a break. Can't be easy, transcribing all of us.

(Well, it's not actually that hard, but--)

Oh, go on. Take a break.

(And leave you to incite chaos unchecked? I don't think so.)

...alright, I know when to pick my battles. Hi, everyone! Agent Dawn of the DMS, reporting to you live, dear readers, from...DawnFire?

(Hm?)

Where are we? I'm just seeing Generic Surface.

(Oh, we're in...your RC. Yes, your RC. Sorry.)

Oh, good. I wasn't done feeding the minis, you see.

(I think they've finished on their own.)

Yeah, looks like. Right, you wanted me to answer some questions?

(Uh-huh. Here's the list.)

"D&D Character Questionnaire"? I'm being asked questions from--hey, page 17! One number higher and we'd have my RC!

(Huh, I guess we would. I hadn't noticed that. So. The questions?)

Right, right. Um...I'd rather not answer the first one, if that's alright.

(No problem. You can pick.)

Alright. Hi, Neshomeh! I think I've seen your agent around...um, let's see. Fears or phobias? Wow, you do know how to pick sensitive questions, don't you?

(Dawn, please be nice. I like Neshomeh. Don't offend her.)

Hey, I'm adorable.

(And stop impersonating Dean Winchester. That sentence didn't even make sense in context.)

You're the one who decided we should have a Supernatural marathon. Alright, alright, fears or phobias. Um...I'm afraid of getting stuck in a badfic that's being deleted. I'm also afraid of turning into a Sue, which, you know, is kind of a possibility, considering I'm a self-insert. I tend to use logic to get my way through them--reminding myself that we have gadgets that let us know when a fic is going to be deleted helps, as does knowing that DawnFire likes me too much to let me go. For the second, there are hopefully enough betas to keep me from being warped into a Sue. Hopefully. *shudders* I'd like to think about something else, now, if you don't mind.

(Sure. Just say goodbye to Neshomeh, and we can go think of ideas for SBEI to share with Karen.)

Sounds good. Bye, Neshomeh! Nice to meet you! Should I pass on greetings to Agent Neshomeh for you? I'm sure I can find her RC if I don't concentrate hard enough...

(Alright, looks like that's a wrap...now, any ideas for SBEI? I was looking at some notes about Mjolnir...)

Ooh! Remember the Supernatural episode? What if Sam told Thor--

(Wait, wait, we're still transcribing. Let's turn it off and)

Cyba Zero's Agents' Mailboxes by Cyba Zero on 2013-03-19 23:35:00 UTC Link to this

Please send questions here for Cyba and Eagrus (and probably Phi and Sigma, too).

Question for Cyba by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-22 02:52:00 UTC Link to this

How many suits of armour are on display in your RC? Which ones are your favourite ones and why? Do you ever wear them?

Thanks! Glad you asked! by Cyba Zero on 2013-03-29 18:21:00 UTC Link to this

Well... let me see... first there's the powered combat armour you gave me; then there's the anime-style samurai armour I salvaged from Eagrus after the whole anime-HQ thing. The only other one I've got is the generic knight's armour I swiped from where that Trekverse 'Stu conjured it up.

The combat suit still has to be the best, simply because 1) it is tech armour, and 2) it is the only one that marginally fits and could be worn. (I say marginally because I still need to get around to making some adjustments for my new implants - if I ever get the time).

Of course, I intend to obtain more...

Cyba Zero, Sigma One, Phi Six by Borg Queen on 2013-03-20 17:17:00 UTC Link to this

Would you consider joining the Borg Collective? You already know how to use your implants. You are already used to working together, so the Borg simply provide a larger community. Besides, it must be lonely being some of the only Borg in a vast transdimensional organization. Your continuum-spanning knowledge would contribute to the Borg's perfection, perhaps allowing us to assimilate the entire PPC. Being Borg would only enhance the PPC's effectiveness. Drones, when dispatched into badfic, will detect Sues immediately and terminate them before the canon is severely damaged. The Flowers the agents so despise will not run the PPC anymore, for if Flowers cannot be assimilated, they will be eradicated. Other continua will be made more powerful by their addition to the Collective, and true perfection, perhaps surpassing that of the Omega Molecule, will be created, encompassing the entire multiverse.

All this requires is your assimilation. Do you want to stand in the way of perfection?

MAAASSSS PAAANIIIIC! by Cyba Zero on 2013-03-20 20:32:00 UTC Link to this

We don't know how you found us, but we assure you that we are most certainly not here, and there is absolutely nothing here to assim-

Hold on, did you say perfection? Hmmm...

CLANG!

This is Eagrus Khan, on behalf of Cyba, Phi and *especially* Sigma: I have a frying pan, and I am not afraid to use it on anybody getting addled by your influence! I also have a large collection of swords, which I hear Borg drones don't adapt to well... I also strongly dislike invasions.

I suppose I should apologize. by Q, the Great and Powerful on 2013-03-21 21:04:00 UTC Link to this

I decided it would be entertaining to scare you, but all I got was an angry weed and an angry Esterling (frying pan, very creative). Mildly entertaining, but it's much more fun to have her at OFAS where Kathy and Jean-Luc can complain about having to have her as a co-worker. Don't worry, you were never in danger of getting assimilated - the whole multiverse filled with Borg drones? The multiverse needs discord. There's no fun in life otherwise.

Hey, it's Q! by Nurse Robinson on 2013-03-22 12:47:00 UTC Link to this

Man, I have always wanted to meet you! I'm pretty sure you're on my author's list of people I'm never allowed to meet, but since this is an AU RP-type situation, I guess we're making an exception. ^_^

Did you know I thought I might be one of you for a while? Obviously I'm not, but I had some serious identity confusion issues for a while there, and we do have some things in common: non-corporeal, (near-)phenomenal (semi-)cosmic powers, enjoy hanging around humanity for kicks, considered slightly meddlesome by some, etc.

I would win so often betting on humanity against you, though. It wouldn't even be fair. Humanity is pretty awesome—though, like you said, the multiverse needs its discord, too (and yeah, we all see what you did there).

So... yeah. I guess what I'm trying to say is, what's up?

~Jenni R.

Why, thank you! by Eagrus Khan on 2013-03-22 09:52:00 UTC Link to this

It is a great relief that there won't be an invasion after all. Also, those three drive me mad sometimes, and I would be lying if I said knocking Sigma over the head with a frying pan to stop influence issues wasn't a little bit satisfying. (Besides, it's not as though any of those three can feel it... much.)

That wasn't the Borg Queen? by Sigma One on 2013-03-22 09:57:00 UTC Link to this

EAGRUS!!!!! IT WASN'T EVEN HER!!!!!

...

AAAAAAARGH!

Tsk, tsk, so many exclamation points. by Q, the Great and Powerful on 2013-03-22 19:17:00 UTC Link to this

You misunderstand. You see, I let her escape from OFAS and told her about the PPC and that there were Borg agents. As I suspected, it was amusing to watch you get upset by her presence. But it is even more amusing to have her at OFAS annoying Kathy and Jean-Luc, and I promise, she won't come here again. I might pop by, though. The PPC is fun!

((Q says the multiverse needs discord.)) by World-Jumper on 2013-03-22 04:12:00 UTC Link to this

((I feel like this was a purposeful actor allusion. If so... I see what you did there.))

Of course it was an allusion. by DisQord on 2013-03-22 13:10:00 UTC Link to this

But not to an actor, to moi. One of my favorite forms -almost as fun as my human form that torments Jean-Luc.
That De Lancie fellow does tend to play me, though.

Who let you in here? by Captain Dandy on 2013-03-20 17:57:00 UTC Link to this

Don't they remember the Assimilation Crisis, and all that fuss last time you lot learnt we exist? I'm telling you, if my Weeds have to face down a Borg invasion, we're not going to be the multiverse's happiest-

-- sorry, what's that? This is all AU? Oh. Well. Never mind, then. Carry on.

Let's just hope you never have to deal with Drathilox, then. by Luigifan on 2013-03-25 20:57:00 UTC Link to this

And also that he and the Borg never run into each other. Two hive-mind collectives trying to simultaneously absorb each other can only end in horrific implosions.

Re: Cyba Zero's Agents' Mailboxes by firemagic on 2013-03-19 23:57:00 UTC Link to this

To Cyba, Phi, and Sigma:
How's that exonet thingie working out? No weird glitches between it and your Borg-tech?

The Exonet by Cyba Zero on 2013-03-20 10:17:00 UTC Link to this

Well, the three of us decided that I (Sigma) should have the exonet until it spawned, so after it took, we rushed off to my RC to keep an eye on proceedings. My resident Borg implants did detect the addition... at least, Phi said the skin around that area got noticably more veiny for a while. We reckon there might have been some assimilation going on, but everything seems to be working. (Ironic Overpower, I've got my eye on you.)

Cyba says the exonet fibres look slightly darker now, and given the size change so far, Phi predicts that it might be fully grown sooner than 3-4 months - probably due the effect of the Borg implants. It does mean Phi and Cyba might get an exonet quicker, though, which they are getting decidedly excited about.

Meanwhile, the teaching construct has started appearing and tutoring me in using the exonet properly. With the connection to the rest of my implants, it is also giving me some insight into using those, too. The best part about it is that I'm getting ahead of Phi and Cyba in that regard, which is driving them crazy. Hee, hee, hee...

((Oh stars, I'd forgotten about that thing)) (nm) by Huinesoron on 2013-03-20 11:36:00 UTC Link to this

Pretzel's Agents' Mailbox by Pretzel on 2013-03-19 22:35:00 UTC Link to this

* Ian Nahinu and Lee Keaton [RC 6237, DMS]
* Kaliel/Maeryn and Orion [RC 404, DBS]

Mini Question for Orion by Outhra on 2013-03-21 18:02:00 UTC Link to this

Is your mini-Lincoln, Abe, the same individual as Lincon, the mini-Lincoln found by Agents Laura Dukes and Danny Richardson? They both hail from the Fallout universe but are minis of a World One figure, they both are described as having, in these exact words, "a tiny yet charismatic voice", and most obviously, they are both miniaturized versions of the sixteenth United States president.

If he isn't, where did he come from?

((OOC: I just thought that they were too similar not to at least ask.))

Orion's Answer by Pretzel on 2013-03-22 05:27:00 UTC Link to this

Yes, he is, though he prefers Abe (and steals all the fresh fruit; it's starting to get to be a problem).

--Orion

Question for Lee by HerrWozzeck on 2013-03-20 02:28:00 UTC Link to this

How did you encounter the PPC, anyway?

Answer from Lee by Pretzel on 2013-03-20 06:15:00 UTC Link to this

Hello, Herr; thanks for the question.

I encountered the PPC a few days after my layoff at the police department in my home city of Desay. I wasn't in the best of places then, since that had been my backup dream job (and I've got my suspicions as to why I was suddenly laid off, but that's a story for another time). I actually ran into the agent who eventually recruited me in one of the bars near the station; he'd been in my home continuum for a short vacation. We struck up a conversation about our work, and when he learned that I'd recently been laid off, he told me more about the PPC.

I thought he was crazy at first, to be honest-- who talks about going around killing fictional characters, after all? Then he told me some stories about some of the missions he'd been on. Next thing I knew, I was standing in front of the Marquis and signing paperwork. I guess it didn't really hit me until we got out of the Marquis' office and into HQ proper, when I saw several agents that definitely couldn't be the product of my admittedly intoxicated brain.

It's been a while since I was recruited- just about four years, give or take, if my math's right -though it seems longer. Anyways, I hope that answers your question. If you have more, feel free to ask.

--Lee

Desdendelle's Agents' Mailbox by Desdendelle on 2013-03-19 21:40:00 UTC Link to this

My Agents are Agent!Des and Anebrin. They reside in RC log₁₀e and are both currently serving in the Floaters Department. Ask away!

Questions for each agent: by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-20 17:25:00 UTC Link to this

What bothers you the most about your partner?

Do either of you have good luck charms?

Would you rather be blind or deaf?

Answers, or lack thereof. by Desdendelle on 2013-03-21 14:23:00 UTC Link to this

1) The fact that Anebrin cannot stomach Bleeptea greatly bothers me.
2) I'd consider my coat one if not for the fact that it is constantly being desecrated by Sue blood, burns and the like.
3) Deaf. I won't hear the console then.

Answers you shall have. by Anebrin on 2013-03-20 22:55:00 UTC Link to this

1) Des' tendency to bash his head on various walls - in fact, his tendency to harm himself while in the presence of badfic - is more than a bit irritating.
2) A good-luck charm...? Even if I had one (I do not), it is obviously not working, since I was sent to "TSAB DOWNFALL: Halo War".
3) Deaf, definitely. That way I will at least not hear my sword singing.

Sergio Turbo's Agents Mailbox by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-19 21:26:00 UTC Link to this

My Agents are Sergio Turbo, Nikki Cherryflower and Corolla, all from RC #1587 and Special Operations Division.

Question for Sergio by the Irish Samurai on 2013-03-22 13:01:00 UTC Link to this

You seem to know quite a lot about weapons. If you could have any weapon, from any continuum, what would it be, and why?

Sergio's answer. by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-22 17:08:00 UTC Link to this

That's quite of a challenging question, actually. I tend to choose my weapons according to mission needs, and in spite of what Corolla says I see them only as tools. Dangerous and powerful ones, though.

I can still name some weapons from my wishlist, though.

The first one, which actually I just got from the Armoury, is the Beretta ARX-160A2 from World One. A great, modern assault rifle.

Then, still a World One-based gun, comes the FG42 from Return to Castle Wolfenstein. Hard hitting, decent rate of fire, and good range too.

For long range work, though, I'm still hoping to get my hands on a Gauss Rifle from Crysis. Not only it has more power than my current Barret M82A1, but it also has the advantage of being much lighter.

However, all of those are weapons that any Agent with enough money can get his hands on. There are a couple of weapons that Upstairs would never let me have, too.

The first one is the AS-24 Devastator from Serious Sam 3. A rapid-fire, drum-fed shotgun loaded with long range explosive shells. Perfect fro blowing up the annoying overpowered Sue you always get once in a while... if you don't care about the massive collateral damage, though.

Another one is the ARM x850 from a FarCry mod called Matto4. I have no idea about what that gun is supposed to be, but it's very powerful yet small enough to be practical.

Questions for Corolla and Nikki by Outhra on 2013-03-20 22:13:00 UTC Link to this

For Corolla: I've noticed that you enjoy eating large amounts of Sue-flesh at any opportunity. Where do you, for lack of a better term, put it all? You're six inches tall, and probably only a percentage of that would be usable for food storage. Do you just convert the Sue-flesh into magic energy as you eat it?

If you spent enough time in a magic-rich continuum to repair your Linker Core, could you grow back to a Unison Device's usual size? If you could, would you want to?

For Nikki: What were the other continua involved in the crossover that you were born in, (or the genres of those continua if you don't remember individual names)?

What happened in your home fic that made you lose your magic, yet still keep your magical potential for other continua? As far as I know, your case is unique, especially considering how you can now change magic systems while within a canon dimension, and it would be interesting to know what caused it.

Corolla and Nikki's answers by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-21 18:56:00 UTC Link to this

Corolla's:

1) Large amounts? What did they tell you about me?! I obviously can't eat a whole Sue, and in fact I eat very little compared to an human, my meals's size being roughly on par with those of an human child.

There's also the fact that Sergio doesn't let me eat Sue Soufflés as often as I want, too...

Anyways, I'm not exactly sure about how my digestive system works, but I do think that we convert food into mana - otherwise I would be full just after a tea spoon worth's of food. Belkan magic users too regain mana through food... and yes, they do eat a lot!

2) My Linker Core's almost fine now, but that's not really how it works - my size impacts on the amount of mana I consume just by staying alive (That's what you get for being a magical construct!). I can access to my regular size and one on par with an human child even ight now, but it would impact on my mana usage - my Linker Core's mana regeneration speed is still kinda low.

Nikki's

1) Well, let me think... Halo: Combat Evolved, Pokemon, Kingdom Hearts, Bionicle, Stargate, Harry Potter and a lot of other that I don't quite remember. It was really confusing.

2) Basically, the author of my original fic made me unable to use the Sakura Cards (I was supposed to be Sakura Kinomoto from Card Captor Sakura), and transformed the Star Key into a Kingdom Hearts-style Keyblade. However, as it was someone else's Keyblade and I didn't have the time to learn how to use it, it didn't follow me in the PPC. My magic potential remained, but in a... blank state? I'm not really sure, and the guys at Medical and DoSAT don't either.

It gets annoying, as my magic keeps changing even when in a continuum with a single type of magic. Especially since I keep transforming in a Mermaid Melody mermaid every time I try to do magic while I'm swimming or I'm drenched in rain.
Anne thinks that if I keep a Device with me all the time and stay close to Corolla I can make it stay as Nanohaverse magic, if not even stabilyze it, though.

Question for Sergio by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-19 23:53:00 UTC Link to this

Do you ever take the planes you own out for a joyride?

Also, do you ever spend some time at the shooting range?

Sergio's answers by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-20 14:44:00 UTC Link to this

1) No. F-22s are expensive stuff, so both Corolla and I tend to use them on a need-to basis. The bills for fuel and maintenance can be killer, even in the PPC.

We do bring them out on the annual PPC Parade, though. No parade is truly such without a fighter jet patrol flight-by, don't you think?

2) Yes, very often. A good aim is vital for a gun-based fighter. While there aren't many "true" battles during missions, you never know when the next one is.
I am currently trying to learn a practical way to dual-wield pistols, but aside from suppression fire it isn't going to be of any help anywhere soon.

You know, if you can't look down the sights even hitting the broad side of a barn becomes hard...

Huinesoron's Agents' Mailbox by Huinesoron on 2013-03-19 21:09:00 UTC Link to this

Which includes the following active agents:

-Takua (Department of Geographical Aberrations)
-Jareth (Department of Geographical Aberrations)
-Terri Ryan (Department of Personnel, DOGA Archivist)

-Steve Dimond (Department of Mary-Sues)
-Penny Smith (Department of Mary-Sues)
-Morgan (Department of Mary-Sues)
-Nyx Nightingale (Department of Mary-Sues)
-Tango Dioxide (Department of Mary-Sues)

-Kayleigh Leonard (Department of Bad Slash)
-Salamander (Department of Bad Slash)
-Mortic Wentway (Department of WhatThe)

-Elanor Laison (Department of Operations, Nursery)
-Nita Kerys (Department of Operations, Building Maintenance)
-Dassie Hyrax (Medical Department)
-Kyaris (Department of Intelligence)
-Charlotte & Catherine Hust (Department of Internal Affairs)

The following retired or otherwise inactive agents may also be contacted:

-Dafydd Illian
-Constance Sims
-Narto Telyan
-Louise
-Selene Windflower
-Vemi Fincaran

And we have contracted the services of a medium to get in touch with:

-Blue Photon
-Imbolc Telyan

(Actually, they'll talk to pretty much anybody; drop by the Tomb of the Unknown PPC Agent sometime!)

... and if you really want to talk to someone else on my list, it can probably be arranged. Heck, I'll even rend the boundaries of time itself and take questions for anyone on the family trees (which technically includes the past as well).

hS

This is a CSS test. (nm) by Huinesoron on 2013-07-11 14:42:00 UTC Link to this

Questions for Mortic Wentway by Outhra on 2013-03-20 22:51:00 UTC Link to this

About how many other agents are there in your department?

Who or what has been running the Department of WhatThe after the Snowthorn's death?

How is it determined if a mission gets sent to the Department of WhatThe or the Department of Improbabilities? Their territories seem to have a lot of overlap.

Ah. Aha. by Mortic Wentway on 2013-03-21 09:30:00 UTC Link to this

I'll answer the last one first, because it's the easiest... Improbabilities deals with strange occurrences in fics - extremely weird examples of normal fic types. So a Gollum Mary-Sue would probably be an Improbability, for instance.

WhatThe deals with things about the very nature of a fic which make you go WTF (although our department has always been named WhatThe, I don't know what you're talking about <_ to take three typical examples a sue who makes god fall for her story where all the dialogue is translated into gaelic or monty python sue. whereas improbabilities deals with fits my expectations sort of but there something weird here whatthe covers way outside usual boundaries usually it either canon you don expect see that just incredibly out like thing.>
As to your other questions... at the moment it's pretty much me; no Head, no partner. The Rhododendron - I think he used to be the SO's secretary or something - is sort of my superior, but that's technically an interim measure: the Department of WhatThe (me) is loaning me out to other departments, with the Rhododendron overseeing the loans. At other times, agents from other departments get loaned to me, with again, R. overseeing.

Does that answer your questions?

|<br>|
|\/|

Question for Nita Kerys by the Irish Samurai on 2013-03-20 13:37:00 UTC Link to this

As a member of Building Maintenance, I'm guessing you've seen more of HQ than most action agents. Is there any truth to the rumours of an HQ swimming pool?

Ah, well, about that. by Nita Kerys on 2013-03-20 21:06:00 UTC Link to this

I haven't actually been in Building Maintenance that long; I stared out in Mary-Sues, and then spent a spell in another department before events conspired to move me to BM. I can tell you I've never seen a pool, but you'd have to ask my colleagues for more information.

~N~

---

Hi there. You're Irish? Cool. I went to Ireland once; okay, it was overrun by zombies at the time, but the scenery was nice.

So. Nita says you're asking about the HQ Pool? There's no such place. Definitely. I've seen every inch - scratch that, every micron - of this place, and there's no pools anywhere. Except that betting pool on when Lux is going to get herself sacked, but that's beside the point.

No pools. There's a Fountain of Bleepka outside the cafeteria, and one of the bathrooms routinely floods - this one time it managed to flood an Escher Room, which was great fun to clear up - but definitely no pools. And no, the Flowers haven't bribed us, threatened us, or taken us out for drinks and explained very nicely to us in order to make us keep it secret.

Convinced?

Denny Robbs (Operations: Building Maintenance, First Shift)

((Denny and the rest of BM1 were placed under my care by JulyFlame when she left. ~hS))

Sort of convinced by the Irish Samurai on 2013-03-22 01:14:00 UTC Link to this

You have at least managed to convince me that I'm not going to get any info out of you.

The wall of silence surrounding this mysterious pool has me intrigued, although going by how little is actually known about it, I guess that anyone that gets close to the truth gets neuralyzed. In fact, there's probably a small but very specialised division/department dedicated to the preservation of the pool's secrecy - it's the only thing that makes sense (it might even be that 'other department' that Nita referred to, I mean, what else could that be?).

You fought zombies in Ireland? Was that the big incursion of '04? I missed that due to some university project work I was doing at the time, but I heard a lot of crazy stories about it from my uncles. And yeah, some of the scenery over there is spectacular.

Silly question for Nita Kerys by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-19 22:07:00 UTC Link to this

Is your name's resemblance to that of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine's Kira Nerys purely coincidental? Or is there some circumstance that explains this? This Trekkie would like to know.

Answer by Nita Kerys on 2013-03-19 22:34:00 UTC Link to this

Why do people keep asking things like this? No, I'm not named after Kira Nerys. No, I'm not named after Nita Callahan. No, I'm not named after Cerys Matthews. No, I'm not particularly neat, or particularly caring. My name is just my name.

... sorry. I get asked that sort of thing a lot. It's... okay, sorry. No, as far as I know, there's no connection.

~N~

Question for Kyaris by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-19 21:20:00 UTC Link to this

How long does it take you to clean your teeth? Y'know, being a hydra and all...

Answer from Kyaris by Huinesoron on 2013-03-19 21:41:00 UTC Link to this

... I'm not sure I understand the question. When I eat something (not someone, those rumours are vicious lies) particularly stringy, it takes a little while to pick all the bits out of my teeth... is that what you mean? Definitely more time than it did before I got so many heads cut off... I don't know, I've never counted.

|/
KYARIS

Ah, sorry. by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-19 22:45:00 UTC Link to this

Talking brushing-and-flossing-just-before-going-to-bed wise.

You do floss, right?

Errrrr... by Kyaris on 2013-03-20 09:09:00 UTC Link to this

Brushing is something you do with fur - I have scales, if you've somehow missed that. I'm pretty sure you made that 'flossing' word up...

|/
KYARIS

hermione of vulcan's Agents' Mailboxes by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-19 21:05:00 UTC Link to this

They have no missions yet, but Tanya Verde and Joani Verde will answer questions. You can find their bios here. Messages to Tanya will be answered by yours truly, and messages to Joani will be answered by my sister who goes by the name Apricot.

Question for Tanya Verde by Eagrus Khan on 2013-03-22 11:41:00 UTC Link to this

Firstly, you have my sympathies for that initial mission of yours. I read the report and I must say I am glad Cyba and I didn't have to tackle that one.

I couldn't help but notice one thing, though... Having heard of your preference for - high-tech - weapons, and being a bit of a sword collector myself, I was wondering if you might consider a trade? Your report suggested you may have confiscated a non-canonical sword from a certain monarch, and over here we happen to have an armoury full of assorted odd items confiscated from a 'Stu. If I had that sword, I might be able to convince Cyba to take some sword lessons, you see...

Also, more agents! by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-21 21:46:00 UTC Link to this

These will be recruits from my third mission, but hey, I might as well get some character practice.

Name: Tani
Age: Unspecified
Species: Romulan/Tribble (more on that later)
Home Continuum: Star Trek
Department: Floaters
Division: Eclectic Subdivision of Advanced Species
Response Center: (haven't come up with it yet)
Partner: Lucana
Fandom(s): Star Trek, anything her author knows
Lust-object(s): none yet
Favorite(s): none yet
Weapon(s): (don't know yet)
Appearance: Generic Romulan female, but with wildly curly hair that makes you think of tribbles.
Personality: She had very little in-fic, besides an vehement denial of her species. After getting a Romulan culture implant, she decided that she still didn't want to be Romulan. Her hair covers her ears, so she generally comes across as a Trekverse human.
Agent history: She began her existence as a Generic Star Trek Alien serving as first officer on a ship of bit characters. Eventually, her species was revealed to be "Roumlants". Since the author had failed to spell "Romulan" correctly throughout the entire fic, every Romulan - now including "Tanya" - was a mini-tribble. However, the agents realized she was still sentient and brought her to medical, where they constructed a Generic Romulan Female body for her. However, her short time as a tribble lead to her hair looking slightly tribble-ish, and she has a fondness for grain products, bread, bagels, etc.

Name: Lucana
Age: Unspecified
Species: Vulcan
Home Continuum: Star Trek
Department: Floaters
Division: Eclectic Subdivision of Advanced Species
Response Center: (haven't come up with it yet)
Partner: Tani
Fandom(s): Star Trek, anything her author knows
Lust-object(s): none yet
Favorite(s): none yet
Weapon(s): She's trying to learn the Vulcan nerve pinch.
Appearance: Generic Vulcan female.
Personality: She had very little in-fic, besides being a "sinance officer" and shouting "with Logic". This odd characterization led her to be somewhere in between Vulcan and human emotionally, leaning more towards human. After getting a Vulcan culture implant, she decided that she wanted to be full Vulcan. However, she doesn't have the patience to meditate, so she mostly comes across as cold or contradicting herself, for example shouting "STOP ANNOYING ME, I'M TRYING TO BE LOGICAL!"
Agent history: She began her existence as a Generic Vulcan named Lucy serving as "sinance" officer on a ship of bit characters. She, Tani, and their captains (he was cloned due to bad spelling) were recruited.

New, less awkwardly personal questions! by Neshomeh on 2013-03-21 16:27:00 UTC Link to this

1.5.2. What is your favorite food? Are there any specific foods you find disgusting or refuse to eat?

1.5.2.1. What is your favorite color?

1.5.2.2. What is your favorite weather? What is your least favorite weather?

1.5.2.3. What is your favorite animal?

~Neshomeh

Response by Tanya Verde on 2013-03-22 19:10:00 UTC Link to this

Favorite food: It used to be chocolate, but since my last mission I've needed regular doses of Bleeprin to stop the memories. So lots of Bleepolate products. I'm the one behind that effort to expand the inventory - you know, it's always just been plain bleepolate, but I'm pushing for dark bleepolate, dark bleepolate with raspberries, bleepolate peanut butter cups, bleepolate covered strawberries, mint bleepolate...You get the idea. I prefer dark chocolate, so that's why I'm pushing for it in bleep-form.

Least favorite food: The only foods I will refuse to eat are organ meats. Other than that, only food I truly find disgusting is what they serve in the cafeteria. Yay for replicators!

Favorite color: Purple. I have a fluffy purple hat I wear around the RC, and I would wear it on missions if it were canonical for Star Trek. Not a fan of pink, though.

Favorite Weather: Weather? In HQ? Well, I prefer too cold to too hot, because you can always put on a coat. Joani, on the other hand, would think Mount Doom was cozy warm.

Favorite animal: You mean non-human animal, I presume. In that case, tribble.

Questions for both. by Neshomeh on 2013-03-20 22:48:00 UTC Link to this

Flipping to a random page in the D&D Character Questionnaire, we have, from page 10:

2.1.1. Who are your parents? What are their names? Did they raise you? If not, who did?

2.1.1.1. What did your parents do for a living?

2.1.2. Did you have any [other] siblings? If so, how many and what are their names?

2.1.2.1. What is your birth rank (i.e. firstborn, etc.)?

~Neshomeh

((This isn't the best question, but okay)) by Tanya Verde on 2013-03-21 01:35:00 UTC Link to this

((Seeing as these agents are self-inserts, this requires me to think about my parents in the context of the PPC. Hm…))
Well, I don't like giving out personal information online, but I will say this much:

1. My parents did raise me and my sister.

2. My mother is a published author - nobody famous, you wouldn't have heard of her. My dad was a software engineer, until he had a stroke. (Don't start offering your sympathies, it was four years ago, he's recovered a lot, and besides, I've been through worse at the PPC.) I credit them both with making me and my sister geeky, and my mother in particular for encouraging me to write.

3. Joani is my only sibling. Thank gods, one of her is bad enough.

4. I am the older one, and therefore more mature. Don't let her height fool you, she's three years younger. Though I don't like the term "firstborn". Because it's always the firstborn who needs to be given to Rumplestiltskin, or killed in a plague. And I remember reading some fairy tales and noticing that many of the heroes were the youngest. And that I'd have to inherit the throne…wait…no, that's still bad, because as Captain Picard said, "Power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely." Of course he could have beeen quoting Shakespeare. It's still awesome. Especially since that was a Q episode…

*ahem*

I'm probably going off on a tangent here. I hope you don't think less of me for it.

~Tanya Verde

((FYI, most of that was true. Besides the having gone through worse at the PPC part. I'd be too comfortable in a world of fiction, so I had to give Tanya some horrible experiences at the PPC.))

(( Oh, sorry about that. )) by Neshomeh on 2013-03-21 04:14:00 UTC Link to this

(( I just picked them randomly and wasn't thinking about it. Would you like some new ones?

~Neshomeh ))

((Yes, please.)) (nm) by hermione of vulcan on 2013-03-21 10:50:00 UTC Link to this

World-Jumper's agent's mailbox by World-Jumper on 2013-03-19 21:04:00 UTC Link to this

Send questions for Marvin and Printworthy [All Purpose My Little Pony division] and even Jumper [Department of Floaters, currently not in PPC, though for the sake of this game, go ahead]

Question for the APD agents by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-20 07:09:00 UTC Link to this

Describe your partner in three words!

Well, let's see here... by Marvin and Printworhy on 2013-03-21 04:06:00 UTC Link to this

Marvin: Sorry about our author's misunderstanding of your question.

Printworthy: Though honestly, how he managed to get confused baffles me. It was a rather strait forward question really.

Marvin: Perhaps, but confused he was, so just, you know, cut him a little slack.

Printworthy: Well, if I were to describe Marvin, I would say... Kind, passionate, and... honestly, occasionally creepy.

Marvin: Hey, what do you mean creepy?

Printworthy: When one is a pony and the other is a brony, it can get creepy, alright? Especially after a round of... anatomical questions.

Marvin: Hey, I was curious, alright? What's so wrong with that?

Printworthy: Explaining each and every aspect of how ones horn, legs and facial mussels work gets tiring and a little disturbing.

Marvin: Well, three words I would use to describe Printworthy are; intelligent, neat, and gramatical.

Printworthy: Marvin, gramatical is not used that way. Grammatical refers to the use, usually quality, of a particular work's grammar.

Marvin: Yeah, and you are really good with grammar, as shown by your correcting of my use of the word grammatical. See what I mean?

Printworthy: Perhaps. Anyway, I hope that answered your question.

Marvin: And don't worry, we'll make sure World-Jumper don't misunderstands your questions again.

Printworthy: ...You did that just to aggravate me didn't you?

Marvin: Maybe.

Ack! by World-Jumper on 2013-03-20 15:45:00 UTC Link to this

Sorry about that. Here are Marvin and Printworthy's bios I used for permission, that should be enough to work off of.

Marvin
Home Continuum: World One
Physical Description: 5’7” Caucasian male with green eyes and short brown hair. Overweight, yet not insanely out of shape, though he gets winded faster than he probably should. Requires glasses or other vision-enhancing material to be able to see things further than two feet away clearly.

Marvin is a massive fan of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. Because of his enthusiasm for the show, he has received accusations from some agents of being a fanboy. Is he? Well, he does not think so. He does not lust after the ponies, he does not write bad fanfiction, and his interest is only a little more than the average person. Ok, maybe a lot more. Still, he is a fan, and loves the show, and he hates the idea of somebody harming the canon because they did not know that they were doing with their words. Because of this, he extends the same passion he has for the show to his missions. Outside of missions, he is calm and friendly, though shy at first. Get to know him though, and he will be a loyal, honest, kind friend.

Printworthy
Home Continuum: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Physical Description: Unicorn with a dark blue body, gray and white mane, and light blue eyes. Cutie mark is a book and quill. Owns a pair of reading glasses for comfort, though does not require them.

Printworthy was the author of the famous Daring Do adventure novels…in an unpublished My Little Pony Fanfiction. For years he lived peacefully in his small home in Trottingham, writing and looking for inspiration for his next novel. One day, while exploring an ancient dig site for inspiration for his new Daring Do novel, he stumbled into a plothole that led to PPC HQ, landing on Marvin, and changing his life forever. As an author, he has seen badfic before, and hates it all the more because of his personal experience with it. Inside missions, he usually writes the charge list, as he has an eye for bad spelling and grammar that is much more refined than Marvin. He is sociable, friendly, and tries to choose his words carefully, though he is easy to exasperate and gets annoyed with ignorance quickly.

Er, a bit of a misunderstanding here. by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-20 17:15:00 UTC Link to this

The question asked to your agents was: "describe your partner in three words."

The answer is to come from their perspective.

Ok... by firemagic on 2013-03-19 21:02:00 UTC Link to this

We have:

* Ari (RC 97, Implausible Crossovers)
* Tera (RC 97, Implausible Crossovers)
* Theia (RC 97, Implausible Crossovers)

* Narav (RC 8888, Mary Sues)
* Lana (RC 8888, Mary Sues)

* Amara Coris (RC 1.877, Mary Sues)
* Cepha (RC 1.877, Mary Sues)
* Fiorano (RC 1.877, Mary Sues)

*Riaa'lzhor (RC 1114, Mary Sues)

Questions! by Sergio Turbo on 2013-03-19 21:31:00 UTC Link to this

To Ari and Fiorano:

Do you actually consider yourselves to be each other's sister?

To Theia:

What do you think about Madokami?

To Amara:

1) Do you still use firearms?
2) What are your opinions about Madoka and Homura?

Phobos's Agents' mailbox by Phobos on 2013-03-19 20:15:00 UTC Link to this

With subsections for:

Barid
Brightbeard
Voltarmi
Durotar and Kur'nak
Agent? Phobos
Decima

They are ready and willing to answer your fan/hate mail.

-Phobos

To Durotar and Kur'nak: by World-Jumper on 2013-03-19 21:13:00 UTC Link to this

What are the strangest packages you have had to send, and where did they go?

Strange Packages by Durotar on 2013-03-19 21:43:00 UTC Link to this

Believe it or not, most of the packages we get are fairly standard contraband. We get a lot of chocolate and coffee. However, we do get some things that are less ordinary. Flames are always "fun" to deal with. Most of the equipment that DoSAT orders are better handled by someone above my pay grade. We, of course, have to deal with the occasional inexplicably buzzing package addressed to Agent Luxury.

However, you were asking about the strangest. That dubious honor would have to go to the Sunflower Official. I will not go into any detail, but I will say that his tastes in niche horticultural reading material run a little... exotic.

~Durotar

SeaTurtle's Agents' mailbox by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-19 19:48:00 UTC Link to this

Here you can send questions to:

*Gaspard De Grasse [Department of Intelligence]

*Marianne Delacroix [Department of Intelligence]

*Fire Flash [Department of Internal Affairs]

Question for Gaspard by HerrWozzeck on 2013-03-20 02:29:00 UTC Link to this

Xanthus Garkaran: So... whatever happened to that StarCraft/Mass Effect crossover that you and Herr talked about?

Agent De Grasse by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-20 03:29:00 UTC Link to this

Agent Garkaran,

Well, there's a funny story behind that. See, I was slated to team up with someone who knows Mass Effect a year ago to investigate a fic, but that sort of slipped into limbo after my accident.

I had only received my commission for about a month and I had just discovered the joys of using a D.O.R.K.S. When I set the device to "CMC-300" to practice my marksmanship with the C-14 at the shooting range, my arms kinda bent in ways that arms weren't supposed to bend (don't even get me started on where my shoulders ended up) and I spent most of the following weeks in Medical doing physiotherapy. So...ouch.

I guess some other agent was assigned to that fic.

--De Grasse

((IRL, time constraints and an astonishing amount of schoolwork. Sorry 'bout that.))

Question for Agents De Grasse & Delacroix. by Huinesoron on 2013-03-19 21:00:00 UTC Link to this

(Because I'm feeling mischievous)

Dear Agents,

Is it true what they say about the Sub Rosa? Because really? Really???

Yours (but not like that),

A Concerned Citizen

Agents Delacroix and De Grasse by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-19 21:18:00 UTC Link to this

Dear Concerned:

If you are referring to yesterday's Great Tribble Invasion of the Cafeteria, rest assured that even if the agent in question was shouting "The Sub Rosa's going to kill me", this had nothing to do with our department head. Agent Harris is simply a very excitable young man. The Sub Rosa is similarly not involved in the Straightening of the Escher Room (caused by Harris) or the Overly Long and Boring Elcor Opera (accidentally broadcasted on a loop by Harris).

Besides, I cannot fathom what the Sub Rosa woud gain from replacing every meat-based dish served in the Cafeteria by Tribble steaks. If anything, it would be a step up from their regular fare.

--Marianne Delacroix

* * *

Dear Concerned,

Ah... not quite sure what you are referring to, sir/ma'am. Can you please specify?

-- Gaspard De Grasse

So, say that I... by Bausiren on 2013-03-20 20:54:00 UTC Link to this

So, if and when I get Permission, where would be a good place to post a mission? I understand that The Pit is no longer available for this, so is there an official area, or should I find one myself and link it to the Wiki?

Good to have you a-Board! by doctorlit on 2013-03-21 14:35:00 UTC Link to this

Greetings, new friend!

There are lots of options! LiveJournal, Dreamwidth, deviantART, Webs.com, The Pit (it can be done, but is a bit risky). Just to name a few off the top of my head.

So, said that... by Bausiren on 2013-03-22 19:53:00 UTC Link to this

Thank you guys!
*hands out sparkly things*

I got myself a webspace. by Ellipsis Flood on 2013-03-21 09:53:00 UTC Link to this

But then, I know how to handle my HTML.

I use blogspot! by Tray-Gnome on 2013-03-20 23:39:00 UTC Link to this

I find it works really well for me. I write my missions/whatever up in gdocs, but have them posted on blogspot. I also have a page for a collection of all the missions that I should probably update.

Ditto on blogger for me. by SpecstacularSC on 2013-03-21 01:43:00 UTC Link to this

In fact, I have two that are primarily dedicated to MSTing and reviews of badfics iMST, since I don't do missions.

Here's the two I mean, for your viewing pleasure:

SC MSTs
SC Reviews

What's Blogspot? (did I spell that wrong?) (nm) by Karen on 2013-03-21 00:24:00 UTC Link to this

It's also called Blogger by Tray-Gnome on 2013-03-21 01:06:00 UTC Link to this

It's Google's blog service! (I actually run my LPs and some of my fiction on there as well)

Just as an example, my PPC blog is here: http://rc43042.blogspot.ca/ I'm using a really old layout that I'm pretty sure you have to mess around with a bit to replicate, but most of the sections are pretty handy and customisable.

Yeah, GDocs by Karen on 2013-03-20 21:18:00 UTC Link to this

Go for google. They may track your every move on your computer, but they're convenient and easy.

Lol, true by Bausiren on 2013-03-20 21:26:00 UTC Link to this

Yes, Google sounds like it could work. I might also use LiveJournal, since I just got an account on there and I'm loath to let it go to waste.

I use LiveJournal; it works for me. (nm) by Cyba Zero on 2013-03-21 09:55:00 UTC Link to this

It's all up to you. ^_^ (nm) by Karen on 2013-03-20 22:10:00 UTC Link to this

GDocs is nice. by SeaTurtle on 2013-03-20 21:14:00 UTC Link to this

It's free, lets you edit stuff, and is great for collaborations. Otherwise, I know some people here use Livejournal or something like that.