Sep 2012 Archive, part a

Welcome aboard!

When writing fanfiction, I agree with Lily Winterwood that the canon is important - but also bear in mind avoiding technical errors, because that goes for ANY writing.

Also, have a glass of enchanted water. Just tell it which drink you would like and it will become it! (Single use only.)

Welcome to the Board! Have some of my hydrophobic water to commemorate the event. Consumption will allow you to compute ln(0)*!

The most important thing to keep in mind while writing fanfic? I'd say that you should have a firm grasp of characterization and the canon world.






*Doing so voids the warranty on your sanity. Be careful.

As has been said by others, the most important thing to remember in fanfiction is Canon.

In recognition of your joining us, I present you with a bag of pebbles and a Random Shiny Object. :D

Hi, have some fudge!

What are your preferred fandoms?

Welcome! I'm sure I have something, somewhere... Ah! Here! Frozen grapes. Yummy. Enjoy!

Hello there, welcome to the PPC. I don't seem to possess super-magical pockets of awesome that allow me to pull out incredibly awesome, albeit fictional, objects that will bring enlightenment to you and allow for greater understanding of the universe. However, I do possess something slightly less awesome sounding, but still rather useful.

Here, have my everlasting friendship. All you have to do is sign this contract I'm holding with my wings.

Anyway, the most important thing to me when writing fiction would be to make your characters three-dimensional. No matter how decent the mechanics of your writing are, no matter how gripping the plot may be, they are worth nothing if you do not have good characters for the audience to root for, or hate, or even just sympathise with.

Without good characters, your world is nothing.

And to avoid creating an OC Mary Sue? Don't do anything to the character that makes it ridiculously unique compared to the main cast, don't give it all the attention, and make sure everything about it is reasonable according to the laws of the fictional universe you are writing in.

By the way, here's a pen for signing the contract.

Let's see, pulling random gifts out of my pockets seems to be my thing, so you get a piece of wire, two blank CD's, and a fistful of gel pens. Have fun with your newbie gifts!

I haven't written fanficiton in a long time, but I'd say that when creating an OC, you have to be careful that they don't steal the spotlight from the canon characters.

Ooh look, a shiny newbie! -tosses graduated cylinder-

As for your questions, hm. I think one of the most important things to remember when writing fanfiction is the Canon. Always remember the characterisations, the general plotline, even, perhaps, the style of the author if it's literary. Try to stay true to it, even when you're writing something extremely AU or cracked up. And for fiction, I'd say find your own voice and stay true to that.

And with Mary Sues? The surefire sign of a Suvian is when the plot ceases to be about overcoming conflict and centres instead on the problems of one particular character - and those problems are usually petty or something that gets overcome very easily through Authorial Fiat. The form of the character never determines their Suvian status (unless it's something extremely implausible for the canon they're in, like anime hair in BBC Sherlock and stuff); the function does.

If you haven't done so already, read the Constitution (link on top of the page). You can introduce yourself to the people in the IRC channel as well (again, link on the op of the page, beneath the links to the Constitution and the Wiki).
Two last things: one, what are your fandoms? And second, last but not least: a newbie gift, consisting of a cup of delicious green tea. Just don't let the carnivorous leaves eat you.

Hello! You have little to say about yourself, yes? ^^

I would say the most important thing when writing fanfiction is to attempt to to write a piece that will display your love for the fandom and glorify rather than mangle the canon - so stay true to the characters and attempt to create stories and original characters that are not detrimental to the integrity of the characters and stories that already exist.

As for fiction, remain true to your vision, but try to have a fair amount of logic (or whatever would pass for logic in that world) and write with the knowledge that most things in your story should have some reason for happening - be it character development, story advancement, or a show of what is at stake/has been lost/has been gained because of the plot thus far. Some randomness is okay, but even that should have some purpose, however small or "insignificant."

I would say the best way to avoid writing a Mary Sue (or Gary Stu) is to remember that no one is perfect and most people have an about-equal mix of good and bad qualities - so instead of a gorgeous, omni-adored, good-with-all-weapons-and-animals character who trips on her own feet at odd times, write a character who some might consider pretty, possesses enemies and reasonable acquaintances, might be reasonable with taking care of cats and handling a smallish knife, and who trips when she's excited, is socially awkward, and sometimes says things she should keep to herself. And try not to make a karma-Houdini - if the character goofs in a way that would be reacted to in the Real World, have the other characters react reasonably (if she breaks something, they shouldn't necessarily flog her, but they should be upset if it was important.)

It's also useful to remember that writing nobles, royalty, and those with ties to the aforementioned upper classes might be fun, but those in the middle- and lower classes are just as capable of having wonderful adventures of their own - just as long as those adventures are reasonably within the boundaries of a canon's reality.

Also, as a shiny newbie, I present thee with a wooden arrowhead I carved with my shoes. Don't ask how - the story would give you nightmares.

... but I reckon have several characters and spread your focus between them. That way none of them get all the spotlight and relevant stuff (literal and metaphorical). However, don't overburden yourself with characters as you end up ignoring most of them and making one or two slightly Sueish.
Anyway, newbie gift ... hmmmm? Ah, yes, I brewed my first batch of CAFfine today, so have a couple of flasks of that. Guarenteed to contain only the cutest of Cute Animal Friends.

Please send me an email, or respond to this post, once you have sent your postcard.

Two more addresses. You know who you are, if you have not yet sent yours, so get to it! :D If you want to drop out because you have grown uncomfortable or for any other reason, now is the time to tell me! No harm, no foul now, but if you do it after I distribute addresses, it messes things up. >.
Ideally, I'd like them by Sunday.

I gave you my address last time, should I do it again?

But, including me, we have seven people, which should be enough. However, if more than two or three drop out, that might be a problem...

SO: email me your address!

Me too!

I'd like to try again.

Please note, that by agreeing to the exchange, you may be paying up to $1.05 U.S in postage to mail your postcard, if you receive someone outside of the U.S or Canada.

This idea is very shiny, so I'm in, spreading some Northern love. :3 Though last time I tried to send a postcard to Japan it took two months. =_=

Shiny idea, yes.

x

Assuming your minions other signatories don't mind mailing as far as Brittania...?

Oh, and how many is 'enough'? Since you said don't email you until that point is reached...

hS

Very much down for this, thanks.

Hey, I'm game if everyone else is!

Ah..guh...Wha...

Oh my poor, poor eyes...

I can't play Tetris now. Ever again. And I can't read Ann Frank's diary. Or hear anyone doing the Super Seiyan power up noise. All the things I will never be able to even think of again. God, I need bleeprin.

I have to admit that I heard of the Snape/Teletubbies fanfic but never actually read it and as for the Anne Frank/Goku fanfic all I have to say is AHHHHHH!!! Who is the twisted soul who wrote this! Why I don't even think it was human being! I think it was a Hitler brain! A Hitler brain that wanted to troll the Internet by writing this, this...(the author of this post is currently suffering from mild hemorrhaging in the frontal lobe, please leave a message).

Congratulations: this is now only one of the top ten reasons that I will never watch Hannibal Lecter. Ever. Because, frankly, what are these writers on?

That I had already heard of the Dragon Ball Z/ Anne Frank one. I had been looking for dramatic readings of bad fanfics and when I listened to that one I couldn't stop laughing. It's just too horrible not to be funny. Also, that Death Note/ Tetris one is both the weirdest and the most plausible in my opinion because Mello already acted like he was on something during the manga.

For me, the weirdest was the Tetris/Death Note thing. How do you--why would you even---ugh.

Because, seriously, WTF?

I pity the poor Agents who are going to kill those things.

...For me, it was either the Snape-boinks-the-Teletubbies (and becomes inexplicably gangster) one or the Goku-hooks-up-with-Anne-Frank-and-kills-apparently-Saiyan-Hitler one.

tolkienfan1993@gmail.com

Shoot it to me; I don't know the subject matter very well, but I'll take a stab at it.

I might not know much, but I'm certainly willing to help. I also do know a thing or two about the Nanohaverse. Mail is desdendelle AT gmail DOT com.

They're pretty, but just try to fit a SEP generator in one of those. Though, they could be a sort of thing for people who pulled full duty in multiple departments (like Jay and Acacia originally did) without being in Floaters. You wear the pin of your old department, and the Flash Patch of your new one...

I kinda want to see hS's agents try to get others hyped up about this. For some reason, I'm imagining Narav reading the symbols as actually being in Canish, and a terrible (untranslated) insult...

Not sure how a red pen would fit into the newer design. I can see the conversation now:

"Our department emblem is a gold...stick?"

"No, it's a red pen!"

"But it's gold!"

"Well, the other option was silver..."

Yeah, I can't see these catching on, but the idea behind it did rather make me giggle hard. :D And these badges are, objectively, rather pretty. I'd wear them :3

You know, the hilarious figres on a lot of them truly symbolize the PPC's tongue-in-cheek nature.

Available in larger sizes here

And with a full description on the Wiki.

hS

I like the idea of streamlined pins, but I find they lack the colour and shape of the old patches.

Are mostly that they don't really mean anything. They're just a bunch of fancy squiggles, no offence meant. They're pretty, but people wouldn't look at them and say, "Oh, a potted cactus." or "Oh, it's a rubber duck with three eyes." they'd say, "Oh, what a nice pin you have there, what department are you from?"

I understand that some (read: most) of the patches don't have any meaning that correlates with their jobs but they were funny and we could pretend they had metaphorical meaning. The ones that did make any sense, like DoGA and the Department of Technical Errors, will lose their meanings to the squiggles.

Also, the DoSAT one looks like a slightly crooked treble cleft. Just putting that out there.

I like them, but I've grown attached to the idea of having brownie-style patches of the kind I haven't seen since the late 90's, and having to iron them on and then sew them later when they didn't end up sticking right.

We're in the IRC, discussing this, if anyone wants to join.

~Araeph

(By the way, if any new victi--er, recruits--still want to volunteer, there's still time!)

Since most of these abominations are short, I was thinking that we could assign three of them apiece to you : your agent pairs will be split up for training. For one mini-mission, each recruit will be under the supervision of Mara and Isaiah, and for the third, the two recruits will have a go at the author-wraith/canon Sues together. (For the more experienced agents, they can just have Mara and Isaiah around for mental support for two missions to prevent insanity. Ah, the perks of being a veteran.)

To help facilitate writing, I suggest meeting with the volunteers in the IRC - maybe a group chat for whoever's available, followed by individual chats scheduled whenever we have time. That should give us a good foundation for this mission-training exercise.

Thoughts?

But I still have to get around to posting my first mission. I'll have to get round to that...

Obviously, they'd be in more of the roles of trainers rather than trainees, but given the amount of responses you've gotten, I think that'd be all right. The more the merrier, yeah? Besides, it'll help me get back into the swing of missioning. *sheepish grin*

I've had a new agent pair in the plans; this might be a fun way to introduce them. I know Pirates of the Caribbean and Mulan a lot better than the other two.

"BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!" went the console.
"Alright! Alright! We get it already!" howled Eagrus.
Both agents went over to the console and peered at the screen.
"Well, the good news is it can't be worse than our last..."
"Don't say that!" Eagrus elbowed his partner in the ribs, but it was too late. "Oh great, a link to an entire pile of badfic. Let me see... three continua I don't know..."
"Me neither."
"... and Pirates of the Caribbean."
"Well, it isn't space."
"Why do I get the feeling that won't be much consolation?"
"Are we supposed to handle this on our own?"
"No, something this big will require a team-up."
"Oh. That's a good thing, right?"
"Good that we get backup. Bad that we need backup."

A/N: I don't really know the other three, but Pirates I can do. Now what were you saying about our agents meeting up, Araeph? :) Faced with this, that sounds like a good idea...

Some people don't know when to quit, eh? (The answer: when they're a head, heh heh.)
Anyway, I volunteer for this. I don't have Permission yet, and the only canon in that list I know is PotC, but this guy's stories (we're not going after authors, are we?) need to go down.

I have seen bad fanfictions. I wrote two or three as a little ten-year-old fanbrat who had just discovered the Internet. I have seen Sasuke Uchiha turned into a whiny little girl whose parents abused "her" and whose brother forcibly married "her."

I have heard of Snape boinking the Teletubbies and finally read Goku hooking up with Anne Frank and killing what I can only assume was Vegeta!Hitler.

I am perfectly happy with all of the above, for one fact alone:

Wills Lover has the [PUDDING!] to go after Mulan and Shang.

I eagerly await the day I am allowed to spork badfics, because my first mission will be to hunt down the first [PUDDING!] Mulan badficcer I can find and set his or her characters on fire.

Kill this one. Kill all its abominations, and then kill it.

I apologize for the overuse of text codes. I am beyond furious. I am so furious I'm beginning to calm down again. I must edit my wiki page. And tape my keyboard back together, as it is very hard to type with the halves on different ends of the room and several keys scattered across the floor. Adieu.

I wish I could help, but I don't know the canons well. Also, I've found my own Suvian monstrosity. Two sues, bad history, bad foreign culture, a Sue-nation, all in 300K words (and counting.)

*Starts frantically working on her Permission piece in the hope she'll be able to 'volunteer' her Newbies in time.*

Because I cannot stand by and let junk like this taint the internet even more. I'm sorry I can't help you on any of this but I really, really want to kill it with fire. The only bright point is that the account hasn't been updated since 2008 so hopefully it's inactive.

Unfortunately, I don't have any fresh recruit (Nikki's already experienced, and Fiorano is Firemagic's)

Besides, I don't know the canons. But I am supporting all of you wholeheartedly.

Spork the living daylights out of this troll!

Actually, this is perfect timing. I have a trio of new agents I've been meaning to start writing. They're mostly from magical girl shows, but this will be great fun.

The three are Fiorano (the evil twin of a dead girl from Nanoha, with 'shadow' magic, sort of), Cepha, a Cthulhu-themed Puella Magi, and Amara, a Character Replacement of a despair-eating eldritch abomination.

I'm having a bout of evil laughter right now at the thought of those two being exposed to Hannah Montana and Little House on the Prairie.

(I'm knowlegeable about Little House, Mulan, and Pirates, [though I hear you've got that covered already]though not Hannah Montana.)

I need to puke my guts out.

Oh Dear Eru!

Oh Sacred Aeldra!

Oh By the Light!

Why would ANYBODY do that?!

(Aeldra is a deity character from one of my longer stories; By the Light is a popular Alliance term in World of Warcraft.)

My brother...f-found...a 75-walker badfic. LotR/Harry Potter.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4006375/1/The-Ultimate-Lord-of-the-Rings

-weeps-

This deserves a mention purely for the creation of Butterbear.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8501824/1/Once-Bitten-Twice-Shy

Ruined! Ruined, I tell you!

*shudders as she skims through the fic* Yep, this is definitely one of ours. You know, I don't think we've done a Harry Potter mission before. Mostly because, as Architeuthis once wrote, Part of the problem with the Harry Potter continuum is that it draws mostly very young writers, who haven't yet learned how to write more... sophisticated or interesting works.

And this would be one of those fics.

It's rather succinctly titled "Naruto Warcraft Xover," and it's written by pr1nnyDUD3.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6674522/1/Naruto-Warcraft-Xover

I can barely make it through the first chapter, but I have already discovered:
--Too many SPaG mistakes to count
--An out-of-character Jiraiya who can instantly ignore the Ninja Centerfold and agrees to teach Naruto a technique that Jiraiya apparently thinks he isn't ready for (and let's not forget he's telling Naruto that controlling his chakra is better than learning techniques to fight off people like, say, the Akatsuki)
--An out-of-character angsty!stupid!Naruto (who swears more than he should canonically) - yes, he is a bit klutzy sometimes, but seldom does he seem stupid enough to think someone who was screaming is fine now because they are no longer screaming.
--A Sue who is a voluptuous blood elf, who bemoans her gorgeousness, and who apparently backed Rhonin and Vereesa's marriage, being a dear friend of the two and all (oh, and she can make the portal in the Blasted Lands - the one that leads to Outland - take her to other worlds. And she possesses an improbable weapon and magical talismans that give her the mana of a demi-god at least...)
--An OOC Rhonin who does not get angry when she beats the tar out of several magi of the Kirin Tor and allows his "dear friend" to be stupid and go through her newly-created portal to who-knows-where
--A mucking-about of the timeline of the Naruto continuum and the lifespan of at least one major supporting character - Jiraiya was not alive to have Naruto cut a waterfall in half, much less teach him what element his chakra is

There are probably a lot more, but it's taking me a while to finish chapter one. Also, I'm not certain, but I might have found three Wrath Cadets: Bad Lands (Blasted Lands), Burning Legions (missing apostrophe), and scourge (as in the Scourge). Does anyone else have any thoughts on this?

Gather them up and let's get them inside where it's safe!

Oh dear god, fifth word in and we have a mini. Poor "pivet drive." And why are there no capitals at the beginning of dialogue sentences? This sort of thing makes me think that Araeph will end up managing to recruit me after all. I'm very slightly busy as of this moment with a bad Sherlock Sue and a Jurassic Park one, but I will happily adopt one of these poor minis when the mission succeeds.

But I'm kind of disappointed about the lack of call me maybe, and the one song that never fails to remind me of Mary Sues.
Dark Side. Kelly Clarkson. Angsty Sue all the way.

Don't know if it's on there, but be sure not to forget Crawling In My Skin by Linkin Park for Angsty!Sues.

Hehe, I know the last one. They used it as the Master's theme in Nu Hu.
-Hums the song-

Clicked the Tumblr link, got the lyrics for the songs on here that I don't know.

Side A: How the Sue feels on the outside.

Side B: How the Sue feels on the inside/ How other people would see the Sue were the fic real life.

Is side A the Suethor's perspective and side B a PPC agent's perspective? "Give Your Heart A Break" is a good song, but strikes me as one that may already be quoted in badfics. Especially ones targeting villains as love interests...

Lovely. It's always satisfying to take those little bitty time and space and grammar issues and rub them out of existence.

Nicely done. The grammar was absolutely awful - I have no idea how your Agents got through the 'fic before the world turned upside down (or something equally crazy) as a result of bad grammar. Also, just curious, but what mission did Takua obtain the non-canon Morgul blade?

I just needed a good laugh, and this mission provided it! I also think the short format had a distilling and concentrating effect on the humour. Absolutely brilliant!

I rather enjoyed Takua's 'grandstanding.' It was wonderfully done, and I cheered when Elbereth and Luthien were invoked, making this the first mission I actually cheered for.

(Well, okay, second, since 'Snapback' was the first one I cheered for, but you know what I mean.)

Oh boy, this is hilarious, and makes me so nostalgic. I may try to actually get back into writing missions from reading this. :D

May I take the minis for the Adoption Centre? It seems you've managed to find a new one, and two who already had homes. :P

Any chances we might see more of these?

I really liked the humour in this mission: everything from the flogged horses to the agents' banter brought a grin to my face. Keep it up!






...Kyaris reference, yay!

Though it can be hard, the ideal situation is one where the character has flaws that go beyond the superficial, such as prejudice, bitterness, or lack of empathy, and they slowly attempt to create it through out the story. Most good characters are not bad people just because of their character flaws, just not as good as they could be. By the end of the story, the character should have developed to be a better- or worse- person. They will still have their flaws, but they will have changed in some shape or form. Static characters are the exception of course, but no one wants a static character as the focal point of their story.
Even a static character should be well balanced though. In the end, there's a lot to mess around with, so experiment with different types, backgrounds, and things 'till they begi to fit into place.
If this had nothing to do with the question, I'm just going to hide behind my balrog now.

From what I've seen of anti-Sues, most of them are written by people who have written Mary Sues before and have received negative criticism, so they try and make their character as non-Sueish as possible. Unfortunately, most authors focus on the physical traits: making their characters ugly screw-ups who have no manners, and don't realize that they still have a character that gets everything they want, has their lust object fall for them, and totally one-ups the canon characters. The only instances I can think of for a good anti-Sue would be if the character was used for comic relief (my mind drifts to Nobby Nobbs).

Welcome a-Board, newbie of some relation to sort-of-newbie KittyNoodles. I feel somewhat belated in posting this, but I think that's just because of the posting spree you went on while I was away doing stuff in places.

A few links I feel I should point you towards would be the the ones for the Constitution, the IRC, and the Wiki, up top. The Constitution contains pretty much all of the rules for our community and should be worshiped with the utmost piety (unless of course you know how to detect a joke, in which case just follow the rules). I see you said that IRCs aren't really your thing, but it's a good place to go if you just want to talk or share random links like you've been doing above. The Wiki is a place for information on basically everything. If you ever have a question, the Wiki is the first place to go, especially about stuff like Permission and other procedures. Other than that, this is the Board where I lurk most of the time. Beware of carnivorous plants.

So to end my rant and fulfill the tradition of gift giving for newbies, I hand you this bag-o-stuff that I got from my journey to the dark forests of nowhere. I includes a water gun, an oar, and a Italian-English dictionary. Enjoy!

Hi! Have some fudge!

Welcome to the PPC! Seeing as you like specs, have a pair of light moonglasses to commemorate the event!

Heyooo, newbie! -tosses cylinder- You can measure things with it! Have fun!

Here, have a cookie!

Since I'm currently running around fanfiction, I'm going to hand the uncannonical and very unusual Firebolt 2006 I just found off to you. It may induce schizophrenia, I'm not sure, but I find myself afraid of flying.

Welcome to the PPC, Specs. Have a crate of Bleepka, you might need it. Also, have you come by the IRC yet? Me don't bite, honest!

Glad to meet you, SpecstacularSC! I hope you'll have a lovely time here. (Glad to see anotehr LOTR fan, too. :D )

I hereby direct you to please read our Constitution if you have not done so already, a link to which can be found at the top of the Board, so's you know the general do's and dont's of our community. Other than that, hang around, chat, and generally enjoy yourself. :)

Have a bag of pebbles and a Random Shiny Object, they always come in handy.

That was not supposed to sound so ... alien.
Anyway, what fandoms are you part of?
Also, as a gift have a pack of cans of CAFfine. Guaranteed to contain the most hyper of Cute Animal Friends.*

*SingingTheThunder will not be held responsible for side effects such as excessive singing and bouncing off the walls.

Don't get me egged!

Also, as is customary, I present thee with an egg. A silver egg, because the golden one was taken already.

What are your fandoms, dear brother?

Nine more days before I can apply for Permission - two weeks before I actually do, unless the explosion becomes horrific and pushes me to action sooner.

And yes, I am really counting days. I feel the ITCH.

I've never been a real hearty gung-ho fan of My Little Pony, so I'm still trying to figure out how it exploded back into popularity.

But my poor Fanfuction.net browsing days will be filled to the brim with MLP, I'm sure. Not necessarily because I want them to, but because I won't be able to get away from it.

Yes, it's another clarification question, but as I fear I will not be able to last the four months I initially planned to wait before asking for Permission, I'd like to understand things as clearly as I can. (On a side note, my eyeballs are sore from reading so much...)

So I know non-mission stories about our agents are fine - and look to be just as entertaining to write as missions - but I see on the wiki that it's "recommend[ed that I] write a few missions first."

Which is completely understandable. Better to practice the harder stuff before you rest for a while on your laurels. I was just wondering if I could introduce my first agent pair - I'm fairly certain I know who they will be - to the readers and to each other by means of a prelude story. You know, something like, 'Okay, we've just wandered into HQ, gone through all the training, been assigned, great, but why is -she- my partner?' It wouldn't be long (probably) but I thought it might be a fun way to introduce the two all around.

Any thoughts or pointers?

Probably the best way to do tropes is to try not to let them influence you one way or the other, and just make absolutely certain to keep a firm grip on the logic of your universe. For example, if you can think of reasons why a katana would be impractical, (Such as, most people have guns, they'll just shoot you when you pull it on them, you can't take it through an airport, few people know how to use one properly, it can't be concealed) then don't use katanas in that setting. It can still be funny, if, say, despite all that, someone does use a katana well, if someone delivers a funny lecture on why they're impractical, or if someone who swears by them gets shot by the practical gunman instead.

They shouldn't dictate your writing style. As you said in your post, you decided to defy "Katanas Are Just Awesome" by nerfing significantly downplaying the efficiency of this weapon.

The question you have to ask yourself is: is this really necessary? Katanas are very sturdy and reliable weapons in real life, so there is really no need to exaggerate their weaknesses. The weapon just needs to have a plausible explanation to be in the story, that's all.

The same concept should apply to whatever you're writing. You should be able to write a logical, solid plot with convincing and relatable characters without worrying about tripping over overused tropes. Do not think in terms of defying tropes, because it's painfully obvious to the reader when you do so.

I suggest you have a look at Tropes Are Tools. I found it to be quite helpful.

Besides, the only reason katanas are so cool is that they're Japanese and that their blade is curved.

Also, don't change the general quality of a thing just to avoid cliches. Unless you mean that katanas are impractical because everyone else fights with nukes, there should still be respect for what the original quality of the thing is.

Also, I forgot the subject title. Sorry.

As soon as they mention Ginny Weasely "conveniently becoming a lesbian" and yu hear the first Sue's name, it's obvious. No one would blatantly offer Mary Sue cliches up like that if it wasn't a parody.

Oh yes, it is funny, and many of the "sues" are really actually well devloped.

Still, it seemed relevant.

Why is this comic a bad thing? It seems like a parody comic.

Clearly, whoever is writing this knows what is s/he doing.

Are we soon to have a slew of badfics wherein canonical Mary Sues are made into even larger Mary Sues? And why have Sues been made the protagonists? Is this an attempt to show the Sues' point-of-view on the whole 'you are a threat to canon that cannot continue' thing?

Or...oh. Oh, Eru. This isn't a sign that Suethors are learning to PPC-proof their characters, is it? Please tell me that's just me being paranoid.

...And why is Venus the patron Sue-goddess? That's just confusing...

Uh oh.

I don't have boots with long enough straps to pull up for this sh-[WOOHOO!]tstorm.

... to hold back on the new threads a wee bit. Three in, uh, four hours is way over the norm for the Board, and while at the moment the ones towards the end of the front page are inactive, that isn't always the case. So it's a good habit to get into to keep it to a minimum - so this, for example, could easily have gone under your last thread.

(That said... it's good, if somewhat baffling, to see the Board moving this fast again)

hS

We're on temporary hiatus. Nesh has been/will be doing a lot of traveling. I've been very busy with running a theatre company. We're not really gone, but we're not really here. Nesh says she will return when she has a mission to share. I will be back when I have the time and energy.

-Phobos

Quiet, but present. As I do.
I keep meaning to talk more, but somehow I never do. Oops?

There were The Two, and then there were three, and then I'm not quite sure after that, and now we're counting to see how many active PGs there are. How many active PGs do we need here? We don't get that many Permission Requests, so two or three active (that is, able to respond to Permission Requests) PGs should be enough for the PPC now.

Your thoughts?

Between summer things and convention things, my weekends have been busier than my weeks (!), so my internet time has been significantly reduced of late. That should be clearing up soon, though.

And still voting, and still wearing a hat, and posting, and so on and so forth.

And wearing her Hat, too!

Recent events have you worried, you say? Can't imagine what you mean...

Do the most senior members get appointed then, or is basically like a free game for everybody?

I have no intention to try and sign on, because I suck at moderation positions, but for the sake of the people here I feel compelled to ask.

The files contained within the zip file were created before the first page of Homestuck even existed. It's malware if I've ever seen it.

I've been seeing this odd warning going around...

Attn Homestuck Fandom: Do Not Download Sburb!

They're saying:

"The file going around called sburb-beta.zip contains some very malicious code. If you play it, an exploit in the game will allow the person you’re playing with FULL CONTROL of your living space, allowing them to physically manipulate your surroundings. This means that a malicious player can trap you in a room to demolish your house.

However, this pales in comparison to the malicious code embedded in the file. When the sburb.exe file is run for the first time, a malicious segment of code causes a meteor to be summoned towards your present location.

DO NOT DOWNLOAD SBURB"


Sounds awfully dangerous...

People havve been freakin out about this all over tumblr and noww iit's on the PPC Board? Giive me a break!

I thought I could escaaaaaaaape it, but I gUeSs I wAs WrOnG.

:o(

HoNk.

I thought it was going to freeze that way.

So...has this piece of work been taken or can I jump in with my Mace of Molog Bal and wreck its shit?

Oh, God, oh God, oh God. New member restrictions are killing me. Can I co-write with someone, please? Because Godtiss, this Sue needs to be destroyed.

Oh man.

If only I had permission.

I would so go for this. Nobody messes with the cynical, snarky, royal investigator of Britain. NOBODY.

Ewwww... how does John have a supposedly adult niece? I know Harry's supposed to be the older sibling, but still.

And the technical errors... Brrr. It's all... squishy.

(By the way, still slogging through Olivia the evil and her random appearance in manged canonical episodes. I finished reading/charging chapter 9.)

I'd be more than glad to give it a go, this is just... icky. Icky-icky-icky. If only I had Permission...

... or maybe it be just the time to attempt to get a permission? Hm. Yes. Good. Put me somewhere on the list called "people who want to seriously mess with this fic one day".

Oh dear Eru, there are so many things wrong with just the first chapter, let alone the rest of the story. I'd personally say that Sherlock's character is mangled beyond recognition in the first chapter alone, given his canonical distrust of people that aren't well known to him being in his flat; I highly highly doubt he'd just give a key to his flat to some random girl who just so happens to related to John.

So, we're obviously dealing with a Replacement!Sherlock, and probably a Replacement!John and Replacement!Lestrade as well. Hmm... I'll think about it, but I'm not claiming this fic at the moment.

I enjoyed reading this. I also found the swear jar funny, although I felt that it was kind of abandoned during the second half of the fic. I was disappointed that there was no Buffy the Vampire Slayer, despite it being in the list of canons. Although, I suppose the fact that the sue was killed before she got to BtVS is a good thing.

(( I'm not familiar with your spinnoff, so I might have missed some context on the jokes. ))

There was a lot of funny things in your mission. Kitty's attempts to avoid triggering the swear jar, especially in situations where profanity is generally used, were definitely chuckle-worthy. I really liked the agents' banter (and their opposing personalities). The execution method was also very much in the PPC spirit. Stabby and shooty things are all well and good, but sometimes you have to do something funny like drowning the Sue in ice cream that your partner's been telling you to put down for half the mission.

The post-mission scene, especially the "kill people and get drinks" line, was also funny because of the contrast between the violent (though friendly) banter and the happy, "they're reconciling" ending.

I did catch one thing that might be a typo, though. In:

Then tell me, o glorious arbiter of all things invective-y,

>Get up this morning
"Wow, it's been ages (read: a year and a half, because college) since I went on the PPC board. I think I'll just..."

>Reads first line: "Oh God what happened to ev--*snerk*"

Made me laugh so hard I sprayed chocolate milk on my keyboard (you owes us a new one, yes you does, preciousssss). Welcome to the Board!

Welcome to the Board! Have some of my hydrophobic water to commemorate the event. Need to quietly dispose of a body? Pour some of this stuff on it (stand waaaaaaaaay back when doing so) and watch it (and the reality that surrounds it) melt before your eyes!

Your intro... I think it blew a fuse in my brain. Of course, I did survive reading My Immortal, so it probably won't do any lasting damage. Since you have no idea what's going on, here is:
F.A.Q For Newbies http://ppc.wikia.com/wiki/FAQ:_For_Newbies
The Constitution http://ppc.wikia.com/wiki/PPC_Constitution
And as your prize for making it this far without going completely bonkers, have a propeller cap. It'll take you wherever you need to go, just watch out for trees!

Welcome to the Board! My name is KittyNoodles, and I shall now attempt to bow with a flourish. -immediately falls over- Dang...

Anyway, one the PPC Wiki there's a whole list of missions written by the agents of various Departments and Divisions - that'd be a good place to start reading, yes?

Oh, and might I present you with a Comedy Ball? It is as heavy or light as it needs to be in order for the situation to be funny. -tosses it gently-

Welcome a-Board! As the local twin in this neck of the internet I feel I should warn you that evil twins are not always that blatant. Your twin may have made a clone of his or her self as backup in case of sudden homicide and may currently be biding their time until the moment they can ruin your life. Or they might be like mine and just copy 90% of what you do. It's dependent on whether they're identical or fraternal. Also, *voice drops to a whisper* don't make any sudden movements. She could be anyone.

*Straightens up* Well then, now that's out of the way I would like to present you with your newbie gift. It's a Reality Simulator* for when you're stuck in a virtual world of monsters and murders and you need a good dose of the mundane. Enjoy!

*Reality Simulator is a generalized simulation and cannot fabricate real people. Any relation to real people found in the Reality Simulator is entirely coincidental, unless of course they are the real people we have kidnapped in order to simulate an actual reality which we have never experienced, we being robots from the 8th dimension. ThatOne is not responsible for any feelings of homesickness that may occur.

Welcome to the fray! Nice to meet you, and your twin from 'half-japan'. I wonder if she'd like to meet my pet 'Sue? They both claim to be Japanese, so they might get along for long enough for you to sneak up on your twin and dump her in a magma pit. Anyway, have a giant pigeon. It might even give you a ride if you ask nicely!
Also, on the note of fandoms... If you ever want to discuss any of ours that overlap (such as Slayers, I also have a full list on my user page), feel free to drop me a line!

Welcome aboard! Also, have some samurai armour - just don't let that evil twin near it!

Hello, hello! Be careful about those evil twins, yeah, my Agent had a Suvian clone who tried attacking an OFU and... well, it wasn't very pretty.

In any case, have a graduated cylinder, and enjoy the insanity!

Then again, we're used to bloody messes on the floor.

Um, I'm Sevenswans, I'm fairly new here too (about a month or so...) and I write original stories, mostly. And I'm now going to give you a box full of tea. Ooh, and have a felt-tip pen, too. It's green.

Clearly you qualify for this group's bloody-mindedness requirement. What are your fandoms?

Glad to have you here. if you're looking for stuff to read, we have writings linked all over the wiki. :P

Have a bag of pebbles and a Random Shiny Object.

Hi, have some fudge!

Please leave your sanity in the bucket, and have fun!

And, a little advice: dispose of the body of your evil twin carefully.

Evil twins have this freaking bad habit of turning up not-so-dead in the next series otherwise. Seriously, they don't know when to give up.

Mine got shot in the heart, fell off a bridge and... wait, he didn't show up again. But I am sure he will.

Any particular fandoms you read/write/fangirl/fanboy over in?

As a Newbie gift, please take these cans of CAFfeine, contains only the most noncanonical Cute Animals Friends.

Side effects such as being hyper and awake are actually intentional. Side effects such as a sudden urge to run through HQ screaming about the laws of Cuteness Proximity are not.

Welcome to the PPC. Like I do with most other new people I greet, I shall offer you my eternal friendship. You merely need to sign this contract that is sitting on my leaf. Do not worry. My eternal friendship comes with no negative side-effects.

So anyway, welcome aboard and have fun here.