Aug 2012 Archive, part b

Welcome (somewhat belatedly) to the PPC! Since I'm pretty sure that everyone else has said whatever needs to be said, I'll skip most of my spiel. Anyway, have an incredibly shiny hat! It's wonderfully distracting and has many small bits that make noises. It's great if you don't want people to pay attention to the rest of your body. You probably shouldn't wear it if you need to concentrate on something though.

Have some Swiss Chocolate and some Bleepka. You'll need them both pretty soon.

Here have a messenger pigeon, perfect for those longish distance calls in low technology continuua.

Welcome a-Board the good ship PPC, where your love of canon is more important than any sanity you may or may not posses. Here is a bag of oddly shaped shinies for amusement and drawing purposes.

Hi! Have some fudge!

Hi! For you newbie gift, have some non-euclidean geometry.

Nice to meet you. I know what it's like to be distracted by shinies; it's a lot more fun than not being so easily distracted. Here, have a ten-ton hummingbird. Flightless, but very aesthetically nice when it flaps its wings.

Welcome to the Board! Have some hydrophobic water to commemorate the event. Caution: reacts violently with reality.

Hey-o! Have fun measuring things with it!

Ok, link to the story I was just asked to write. Enjoy!
http://Happinessandchoc.deviantart.com/art/Of-flowers-and-patinas-320526565

Hello there. First of all, if you haven't done so already, read the Constitution (there's a link in the top of the page). Reading the Original Series, as well as any spinoff that catches your fancy, is also recommended.
Last but not least, your newbie gift: a cup of tea. Just don't let the leaves eat you.

Greetings, new friend! Oho! Someone else I can direct drawing envy towards!

So, what sort of stories do you prefer to read?

Hey, pigeons are very distracting!

Somebody told me to bring gifts, so here's some orange juice and shiny rocks.

What fandoms are you into? Is your handle off Avengers movieverse, Marvel comicverse, mythology? Would you like some essence of glee?

I was working on my book...I typed Cadyna (forgetting momentarily that I had not typed it on Word yet and so it was not in the dictionary) and the computer was desperate to convince me that Cadyna's name is actually cantaloupe.

I think I might turn this into her nickname...

I was typing "Eldritch" and spell-check suggested the word "britches". No other words, just britches. I really wonder who is in charge of these things.

Once I decided to include some Estonian phrases in a fanfic written in English... computer didn't like it. I think my favourite moment was when 'kohutav kass' (horrible cat) was changed to 'Jehovah mass'.

Also, in History class teacher's Word corrected Aleksander Suur (Alexander the Great) to Alexa Sour. :}

During an Irish Lit class, one of my classmates wrote a paper comparing and contrasting William Butler Yeast and Samuel Bucket.

Also, apparently my kitchen has a tim roof, and my phone knows better than I do that I live my girlfriend very much....

I had to do a research on a foreing nation, and I choose France.

Obviously, I cited the Storming of the Bastille in French history, but in Italy Bastille is italianized as Bastiglia.

Word decided that the Bastiglia didn't exist and corrected it to Pastiglia (pastil, tablet).

I once wrote a Watership Down script and my computer was very insistent that instead of El-ahrairah I wanted to say Hell-raiser, Camel-Hair or Waffle-Iron.

1. I guess so, if they're not putrid enough to warrant execution. You'll have to talk to one of the older posters about that, I think.
   2. According to the Sailor Moon Wiki, Death Reborn Revolution calls forth a large amount of ribbons, which wrap around Sailor Saturn, and slice up the unfortunate target of the attack, while apparently draining the target's power with "negative energy". In addition, a tremendous amount of energy is released from the ground, enough to destroy the ruins of Mugen Gakuen, and reach the Tau Nebula. The attack is sufficiently powerful to destroy one of the primary antagonists of the series, the aspect of Chaos known as Pharaoh 90.
   Link to Wiki page: http://sailormoon.wikia.com/wiki/Death_Reborn_Revolution
   3. Might I recommend the Mini-Artemis?
   Info on the regular Artemis: http://sailormoon.wikia.com/wiki/Artemis

Also, does anyone know what the Sailor Moon mini should be?

There is a badfic thread, seven threads below this one. It is, unimaginatively, named 'Badfic'. Coincidentally, I started it.

this Sue is several speshul things. First a Metamorphmagus, second, she has power over fire and third, she is an Arua. An Aura is a misunderstanding based on a misspelling of Auror and movie apperation.
However it's just a rehash of moviecanon.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8392031/1/The_adventures_of_Angelina_Tonks

Hello, Constellation! May I present you with a chocolate bunny from three Easters ago? It kind of has a mind of its own, though, so you may want to bop it on the head before you eat it...

Lord of the Rings is awesome. Period. It is so awesome that questioning its awesomeness summons a balrog that eats you.

What sorts of things do you write? I prefer free-verse poetry and fantasy, m'self...

Have some Tabula Rasa cake! It'll change to be the most delicious possible cake depending on the environment you open it in!

What's your favorite constellation?

Hi, have some fudge!

I've been tabletop-gaming for close to 30 years now (with a few hiatuses), but never got into LARP. That might change; I supported a Kickstarter for Champions Live Action because I know the guy publishing it, so there's a rulebook and customized stopwatch on the way.

Greetings, starry new friend!

I see you are a writer! What sorts of stories do you write? And what types of fic do you tend to read?

I also see you are a LARPer! I'm afraid I don't know a whole lot about that! What all does LARP entail? Care to share any fun stories?

I see you are a fan! What kind? My personal preference is the kind that hangs down from the ceiling, although they make me nervous when I'm sleeping under them . . .

Welcome to the Board! Have some of my hydrophobic water to commemorate the event. First produced during a timey-wimey accident.

What's your favourite incarnation of the Doctor? I like Nine a lot.

Welcome newbie! Since you've been here a while, I don't think I need to waste my words on suggestions to read all the important materials and documents. Instead I'll just give you a miniature chocolate Cyberman and run away cackling maniacally. Hahahahahahaha!!

Lord of the Rings fanning means you are in quite good company. Doctor Who means I shall give you a bowtie. Sherlock means I will ask if you watch BBC Sherlock in particular and if it's actually any good because I'm contemplating getting into it.

In addition to that bowtie, have a lightstone. It glows, it's probably based on some kind of quartz, and I pulled it from a time period in which Karda Nui is active so unless you take it into a Bionicle fanfic set post-canon it'll stay lit forever.

Always great to see another Whovian around here; by complete coincidence it's my newest fandom too. Since I've noticed that you like Sherlock, I shall hereby award you with a deerstalker cap. It may not actually help you solve mysteries, but it will make you look like you know what you're doing.

*Hands Constellation a bowl of fish fingers and custard.*
Well, hello, pleased to meet someone else insane. Not that there's a deficit or anything ...

Hi there! It is recommended that you read the Constitution (link at the top of the page). It is good to know you've already left your sanity at the door.
Last but not least, have a gift: a cup of tea. Just don't let the leaves eat you.

Welcome to the fray! Lovely to see more people here, and I see you're a fan of LotR. Most people here seem to be Tolkien fanatics, myself included. Must be the sheer skill of the great Tolkien. Here, have a genetically enhanced cyborg eagle. It barely explodes at all now!

The mission was well-paced, and I really liked the "Kill it with fire," part. It was funny.

I just wanted to point out that you're missing an apostrophe near the end:

Right,” the RMC said. “Bella, you have never met Edward and wont for some years to come.

(Terri's on holiday in, er, looks like some sort of computer game, not sure what that's about, so I'll have to do my own concrit for once)

To start off: your characters are definitely characterised. I couldn't quite tell who was talking without checking the tags, but it came pretty close. It's nice to see characters who aren't interchangeable, neh?

I have to address, though, the remarkable foresight they portrayed. It comes from reading the fic before writing the mission, of course, but: before that line about the Pevensies, they made a lot of comments about the events not matching either canon. Well, no - but it seemed to be intentional, as if the author was creating a sort of collision-universe (like, say, a pretty good fic I once read where the characters and locations from the Discworld were used to play out the plot of Star Wars - it didn't make the blindest bit of sense in either canon, but it wasn't meant to). Obviously she(?) /wasn't/, it was just very bad writing - but it did seem that way.

(Oh, and did you notice the brief Harry Potter crossover? Professor Cedric > Cedric Digory > Digory Kirke? Mini-Aragog and mini-Dragon protection fields erected over this aside as I'm not sure on the spellings and have no way of checking - most of the internet is blocked here)

On the MST thing: it was a /funny/ MST, it has to be said. If you want to make your later missions less MST-y, my advice is to use less direct quotes. I can't access my missions to check (internet, blocked, etc) but I tended to paraphrase the action most of the time, only quoting when some particular turn of phrase warranted it. That way you can slot your agents directly in.

Hypothetical example: fic says, 'I leapt into the tree, my feet barely touching the ground'. You could quote that directly and then write '"She didn't jump very high, then," said Agent One', or you could miss out the quote and write something like this:

The agents watched, bemused, as Marysuewen knelt down, leapt high in the air - then grabbed a branch only just above head-height, leaving her feet about an inch above the grass. "Huh," said Agent One, glancing at the words. "I guess that's what you get for not checking your idioms."

(I enjoy writing, so I pepper my reviews with bizarre examples. Does this surprise anyone?)

I do like the way you integrate PPC locations and tech into your story. The mention of the Canon Library got me smiling (as always), but I liked even more the fact that it didn't have to become A Big Thing: it's just like going to the shops, just one of those things you can do. In a different way, I liked the consistant use of the Fictionary: specifically the fact that you remembered it was there, rather than having your agents default to Just Knowing after half the mission.

So hey. Good job. Fun stuff.

hS

“You can write the charge list.
You missed the closing quotation mark here.

In general, though, I have to say you fell into the MST trap. You mentioned that the mission was turning into one and poked fun at it, but still didn't really do anything to loosen it up. The fic bits were nicely timed, but I feel like there could have been scenes you could have skipped. The parts out of the mission looked good, making me want to look up the characters.

All in all, not the perfect mission, but not bad either.

Excellent work. Thank you for killing that abomination. Narnia is one of my favorite continua, and I hate Twilight pollution.

Hey, a fellow newbie! We can be shiny together~!

The only fandom we have in common (provided neither of us have forgotten any accidentally, I know I did...) is My Little Pony, sooo...

I present you with a pegasister/brony jacket with fully functional wings. Don't ask why they are functional, the explanation will horrify you. -angelic smiling-

Well met, fellow Touhou fan! I can understand finding the Board intimidating, having taken a long time to sign up myself. I've also come across Oriental Transience of Scarlet Waning Moon - I could probably vaguely assist you in sporking it. Anyway, have an aerodynamic dodo - not very useful, but very friendly.

Welcome to the PPC!

Here, have a toolkit and a Basic Omnibus of Technical Issues and How Possibly to Fix Them. Knowing some of the tech around HQ, you might need it!

Good luck!

And ever since last November, every plover for newbies has come from Fluttershy.

Oh, and Fluttershy is best mane pony, Big Macintosh is best supporting pony, and Derpy Hooves is best background pony.

Welcome to the Board newbie, no need to be shy! We're all a little bit insane around here so it helps if you are too. To help you with that goal and any others that you might have, here's an abominable Eldritch. It's smaller than an Eldritch abomination but it's also less likely to eat you. It answers to the name of Ed and likes bacon and Sues for breakfast. Treat it well!

Have some cottage cheese!

Someone always brings this up and since no-one has so far, I supposed that means it is my turn.
The required reading as so far as you haven't already read it is:

The constitution. https://docs.google.com/document/pub?id=18hztHpDehxcfrjaXoFUew1vb0BdZPDAusHxMHzHiCzM

How to get permission and what to do with it once you have. http://ppc.wikia.com/wiki/Permission For some reason it is not in the article, but we usually say, that after introducing yourself, you should wait at least an month to ask for permission. During that time you should hang out and be active, either here on in the IRC.

The original series. http://www.misssandman.com/PPC/story.html and as many other missions as you can.

Glad to have you here. Have a bag of pebbles and a Random Shiny Object.

Welcome to the Board! Have some of my hydrophobic water to commemorate the event. If it implodes, look directly at the implosion.

Good to see another Smasher here. Who do you main? I like to use Zelda and Link (bottom tier, go!).

Wow! Another newbie! I've always noticed that newbies seem to come in groups, even when they don't already know each other. Anyway, welcome to the PPC! Make sure to leave your sanity in the marked receptacle by the door. Your prize for making it this far is a propeller cap! It will take you wherever you need to go provided that it's not indoors.

Greetings, new friend! Have a Smash Ball! Just don't hit it too hard, we just reupholstered in here.

Do you do much fic-writing? If so, what kinds of stories do you tend to make?

Hello there, fellow shiny newbie! Since you like ponies, for you I have this baby pony, who is made of bronze. Polish 'em well.

And I too love all kinds of webcomics! Do you have any particular favourites? Mine are currently Weregeek and StupidFox - both are made of Awesome, at least in my opinion.

Hi, have some fudge!

And Homestuck. Ho-lee kids and fun, Homestuck. (Intermission 2, [S] Caliborn: Enter...) Any other fandoms of note? Discworld, LotR, and Harry Potter seem to be main ones for the PPC in general.

While I'm here, have some cotton candy. The 'fic I posted last night spontaneously generated it.

Hi! I am also pretty new here, but I hope to get permission soon.

For you newbie gift, have an object of your choice that can't rationally exist.

Wow, welcome to the wonderful world of Nanoha! Anyways, onto answers:

1) It probably depends on the kind of attack. Starlight breaker is probably fine, but Fate's giant Zanber attack that she uses to destroy the BoD's shields, which is essentially an enormous laser sword, probably could not.

2) Again, it depends on the Magical Girl. In the first season of Nanoha, the transformation takes a few seconds, and can be interrupted, but there's a strong barrier spell around her to protect. I have no idea how it works for Sailors, but go with Rule of Funny.

1) is certainly possible. Hopwerever, the poeral should be actually bigger than the width of the beam, otherwise crazy stuff might happen.

2) depends on the series. For example, Nanoha has transformation sequences, but they are instantaneous to the outside viewer. Same thing for Madoka Magica. I don't know in Sailor Moon, though.

1) Provided your agents react fast enough, they can play "Portal" with thermal discouragement beams lasers. It would also provide a good opportunity to impale a Sue on her own sword.

2) The comedic effect here is just too good to miss.

Nice to see another newbie signing up here. You're the first fellow fan of Warriors, so if you want to discuss it sometime, feel free to contact me on the wiki. While I'm here, have a fanged duck. It does bite, so be careful when you feed it. I've enclosed a muzzle and leash for your convenience in walking it.

Welcome newbie, you are one of many. Since you've been lurking for a while I guess I don't have to grill you about reading the Constitution and the Original Series, as I assume that you already have.

I'm happy to see that you have a variety of fandoms, many of which have a large support group in the PPC. Don't worry about Twilight, I've read the series too, just to see what the fuss was about. I wasn't exactly enthralled but everyone has their own tastes.

Anyway, to welcome you aboard I present you with this kitten and a bowl of ramen, as your name has instructed. Have fun!

Greetings, new friend!

Have a telltale cart! It's great for pushing heavy stuff around! Just, uh, try ignore that rhythmic pounding noise . . .

Five newbies in a little over one week! That must be some kind of record. I used to read Warriors when I was younger, but I feel like each series got progressively worse. I don't really agree with you on Twilight, but I respect your opinion. Plus you like Poe and Shakespeare, so all is forgiven. Since you're a brony/ pegasister, I hereby present you with a unicorn hat complete with mane.

I will give you a Bleep-based chocolate for future use. Anyway, welcome to the PPC.

Welcome to the Board! Have some of my hydrophobic water to commemorate the event. Fuels nonsenseium engines!

Hey, another WoW fan! Quick question: Alliance or Horde?

No. No no no, Kitty. You haven't seen giant introduction posts until you've seen mine. 1413 words and counting. Now that was a massive teal deer of a post, considering I've posted complete oneshots shorter than it. (One, and by a grand total of 12 words, but still.)

Anyway! Warriors. My little sister's into that, but I haven't bothered to stare at it until I can tell where to start. Ponies? Ponies are awesome. DBZ, heard of, heard of memes, never watched. Naruto, haven't quite gotten into that yet. WoW, I'm on Starter Edition and am an Alliance Dwarf Hunternoob except the trolls and tauren are pretty cool but I have Opinions and they're all "THRALL COME BACK". LORD OF THE RINGS YESSSSSSSSSSS. As for Twilight, well... like what you like, and what do you think of Luminosity/Radiance by Alicorn?

I have all of the Immortals quartet. I swear. Glod only knows where Wild Magic is, but I bought all of 'em. And I've read the Circle books (first two quartets anyhow and the Empress book). Never managed to finish reading the Alanna books or PotS. I know only Poe things which are firmly engrained in the public consciousness (Nevermore!). I found Romeo and Juliet annoying as hell when I did it for high school just because they were a pair of idiots, but the story itself was fun. 'Fraid I haven't read any other Shakespeare-y stuff... wait no, his sonnets, they're on Wikipedia.

And again. Your post is a massive not teal deer. :P

I wouldn't call your post that long - don't worry!

Also, a hearty welcome to you! Have a beverage of your choice! *Hands KittyNoodles a shiny cup and a bottle of enchanted water.* Simply tell it which drink you want it to be and pour.

Good luck!

Most of it what people would have asked you anyway, so it's handy to have in one post.

Anyway, welcome on board! Have a fruit salad!

Hi, have some fudge!

I've got a DVD of Macbeth with Sir Patrick Stewart in the title role making its way to me -- I blew some overtime money over at Amazon. Do you have an opinion on staging Shakespeare in other time periods than the late 1500s-early 1600s?

Lovely to have you here. Have a bag of pebbles and a Random Shiny Object.

Also, we won't kill/be violent at/dislike you for liking Twilight. We respect the right of everyone to enjoy whatever fandoms they like, regardless of our own opinions on them. (Besides, everyone needs a few guilty pleasures. :P )

I do approve of your love of Lord of the Rings, though; that's my oldest fandom and probably my most beloved. :P

...I insist on my agents meeting your agents. Another DTE pair is MORE than welcome!

Araeph

And after reading your sample, I can't wait for your missions!

...because the unclaimed badfic page is locked and will not allow editing, even though I am logged in. The claimed badfic page seems fine though.

Needless to say, I will move the entry on "Mess Efekt: Atak of Geths" to the claimed page once I am able to delete the entry on unclaimed.

I will take this opportunity to properly claim it here on the Board though. *Claims*

Nice job on getting Permission! I really loved how you gave an entirely new perspective on Final Bosses.

As a Permission gift, I'd like to hand Agent Cyba Zero a factory-fresh CMC-300 powered combat suit.

For Agent Eagrus Khan, a crate of Peruvian Instant Darkness Powder to help him reach his defensive locations.

Link to my writing sample:

http://cyba-zero.livejournal.com/690.html

This is spell-checked, beta-ed and ready to go. My beta is a friend of mine who also writes, and having read some of his writing, he does a good job of it.


Link to the badfic in line for sporking:

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6267854/1/Mess_Efekt_Atak_of_Geths

Title: "Mess Efekt: Atak of Geths" by MightyBadger

My reasoning: it is short, the main charge is bad spelling...and something so badly misspelled as 'Urdent Rocks' CANNOT go unnoticed. My agents will also return with enough minis for a small army.

I have two queries: 1) does anything special happen regarding minis when the actual CONTINUUM is misspelled; 2) seeing as there is no apparent Mary Sue to speak of, presumably I exorcise a bad-spelling-inducing-Sue-wraith from Shepard?

Cyba Zero:

Home continuum: World One
Species: human
Appearance: straight, black hair reaching about half-way down her back, usually kept in a low ponytail and oiled backwards at the front; grey eyes; fair-skinned with average tone; average height and fairly slim
L.O.: none; is somewhat disinterested in the subject
Fandoms: various science fiction and video game continuua
Likes: technology, armour, cats (the animal), good writing, LARPing, sci-fi, coffee, chocolate; has a soft spot for mechanical or part-mechanical creatures (for instance she finds mini-Colossi cute)
Dislikes: technical errors (bad spelling in particular), anybody trying to glomp her (especially if they succeed, especially if it is Lux)
History: fell through a plothole while LARPing and ended up in HQ - rather surprised, a bit bemused and in full costume - where she was summarily recruited when her extreme dislike of bad spelling was discovered; newbie agent
Character: likes collecting armour from continuua she visits and decorating the RC with it (most is too heavy for her to feasibly use, but she will if she can); relatively neutral about Mary Sues unless they cause lots of technical errors or are generally, all-round terrible, but will remove them because it is her job and she likes to do things properly; is a bit of a perfectionist; has a tendency to scream loudly when shocked

Eagrus Khan:

Home continuum: Lord of the Rings
Species: Esterling (Easterling victim of a mis-spelling)
Appearance: blue-eyed and medium build but otherwise unknown because he refuses to remove his armour except in private; one theory is he possibly dislikes some aspect of his visage due to not being Easterling-looking enough
L.O.: none so far
Fandoms: Lord of the Rings, various fantasy continuua
Likes: magic, fantasy, his personal suit of armour, swords, good writing, defensive locations
Dislikes: technical errors (particularly bad spelling), space, space-ships, being in space, too much tech or tech-speak, removing his helmet in front of anyone unless in disguise, exposed locations, anybody entering the RC unexpectedly (in case of invasion)
History: originally a bit-character in a Lord of the Rings badfic and recruited by the agents who dealt with it, he is the victim of a misspelling that causes an odd fruity aroma to follow him around - this misspelling makes him feel sorry for other characters similarly afflicted and causes his dislike of bad spelling; experienced agent
Character: trained swordsman, due to his soldier background (although not good with any other weapons); has a certain paranoia about being crept up on by enemies so is very picky about resting locations, also due to his soldier background; is still struggling with getting to grips with science

Send me the link if my help is wanted, or however these things must be done. First time beta'ing on this site, you see.

I can do it.

"However, after poking one too many things with a stick, he was cast into a Void Between Worlds for a while. Eventually, he was fished out by someone using a malfunctioning remote activator. He was then recruited."

You may or may not be aware of the fact that there already is an agent with pretty much that backstory. Also, I think you're trivializing that whole falling into the void thing. Being stranded in the void is a thing that drives agents insane. Noir isn't because he doesn't remember, and still, he's messed up and had to spend time in FicPsych.

Yep, I suppose that I am not cut out for this. Sorry for wasting your time.

Coming out of my standard 'silent lurking' because of my love of Sanderson.

1) Third Heightening is... really quite powerful. 'Wealthy Merchant' might not even cut it for justification for it. The thing about powerful characters isn't straight up that powerful = bad, but it gets closer to Sue/Stu territory. I think last time this came up the concern was that you explicitly like having powerful characters for the sake of powerful characters, and that you avoid admitting how powerful a character is in order to get your shiny. This smells exactly the same. The "she fell into a gaping plot hole while chasing a bird" makes me especially skeptical.

If you feel that strongly about having a higher BioChromatic power level, I'd go with Second Heightening, much closer to 200 than 600 Breaths (seriously, 600? It's a freaking lot).

2) Writing sample: to be harsh, it made my eyes bleed a little. It read like you were writing Wheel of Time fanfic for someone who doesn't read Wheel of Time. The result sounded like "Wheel of Time for Dummies." If someone's reading WoT fic, they already know these basics. If some doesn't, it just comes across as clumsy. Other, less explanatory-details-oriented clumsy sentences include: "She paid the scribe the twenty-seven crowns she had paid for Talavin." More importantly, however...

Grammar. You consistently abuse the rules of punctuation, especially governing comma placement with dialogue. In fact, you do so in almost every line of speech. You also left out some periods at the ends of sentences. It means not only are you beyond careless with punctuation, but either your work is un-beta'd or you choose seriously sub-par betas.

On the off-chance you take my criticism to heart and change it: I applaud your decision. However, it came after effectively publishing it. It doesn't count.

Periods at the ends of sentences? That's elementary school material. There is no excuse.

Mainly on the basis of your sample. I honestly only read about a page and a half of it, but that was more than enough. There are spelling, punctuation, and grammar mistakes everywhere. Some of them would have easily been caught by a spell-checker, which kinda says that you didn't even try to edit.

Of the mistakes that wouldn't be caught by a spell-checker, here are some of the highlights (emphasis mine in all cases):
-You used 'seen' instead of 'seemed'.
-You used 'right' instead of 'write'.
-"The sun beat down harshly on the backs of the slaves being sold, which were bared to better allow prospective buyers to better view their purchases."
-There are several instances of tenses not agreeing. For instance: "The auctioneer began to call out prices as the bidding reach twenty crowns"
-"As the woman turned away, her small encourage followed her"
-You used 'women' when you were clearly referring to a single woman. This happened multiple times in the same paragraph.

So, permission denied. You need to have a firm grasp of the basics before you are allowed to write PPC stories.

-Phobos

Based on knowledge of other canons by Sanderson and previous threads, I have some concerns about Kiira's power levels and abilities, but I'm not acquainted with the canon. Can someone besides StarShadow give info on that, please, since he has purposefully downplayed the power levels and seriousness of various canon abilities before?

On that note, I don't think he should be granted permission due being purposefully misleading.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1euVm9gEEvi9npVKeo1i8v29S8ZzBtYgeXy0DS7p0wFU/edit

I can't access your sample. It says I need permission. Try making it "Anyone with the link can access."

-Phobos

I've been a fan of his since finding one of his old short stories in a copy of Analogue.

Does Ivan twirl his moustache?

Also, It's going to be interesting to see what continuums can handle an enormous intelligent tank.

They're certainly not run-of-the-line Agents, and I see a lot of potential for humour. I look forwards to seeing more of what you write.

Sounds like a great thing to have around HQ - and fortunately I think most of my remaining agents are human. Out of interest, what would her programming dictate if, say, an Elven agent tried to assassinate a human Sue in front of her? On the one hand you've got the 'this is a Mary-Sue, she hurts other humans by warping them', but on the other hand you've got 'this is a non-human attacking a human in front of me'.

As to Ivan... he sounds like an interesting ground to work from. Not much to him so far (in this summary, at least), but that's okay, characters can be built on the go. I do wonder about his perceptiveness, though -- he seriously thinks the Flowers are skilled leaders? Something seriously wrong there. :P

hS

Unfortunately, supertanks are fairly limited as to the continuums in which they can operate undisguised... Looking forward to that one!

If you need another limiting factor, you could always say that an undisguised Bolo is too much for a continuum to accept - dropping her disguise gets Susan forcibly ejected into the Void.

. . . Susan's particular protection for humans. We've frequently seen an agent of a non-human species have a particular inclination for keeping them safe from badfics, but I think this is the first time I've seen one focus on humans.

And there are a lot of humans out in the multiverse! I hope Susan doesn't blow a gasket (or whatever she's made of) from all the badfic stuff she'll see happening to them!

'...tendency to speak like a stereotypical archvillian, complete with maniacal laughter' - sounds amusing, I'll look forward to this one!

Now that hS has been kind enough to assure me that I probably wont be run out of town with pitchforks (he then left to check up on some farm equipment) for posting this, here is the link to the page for the project. http://www.indiegogo.com/teslamuseum

They seem to be well on their way, but of course, buying the land is only the first step. I think this is awesome and I can't wait to see it completed.

Also, If we look at Real World history as just another canon and Tesla as a character, you could almost say he was written out of his own storyline. So this museum is like a real life version of setting canon straight.

... I don't think we'd have any problem with it. If it's funding the abolition of standardised spelling we might give you some very funny looks, but we wouldn't run you out with pitchforks.

Probably. Unless we thought it was funny. This is the PPC, after all.

Please excuse me; I have some farm implements to check up on. ;)

hS

DoI isn't owned by anyone, so you don't have to ask specifically to make a Spy, but to write stories with them, you need standard Permission.

That's assuming by 'badfic reports' you mean the usual combination of an account of the Spy's adventure in the story, followed by a formal report giving details to any agent who might be assigned to it. If you just wanted to write the formal report (Title, Type of Badfic, whatever else we put on them - can't get at the Wiki to check), which would basically be like sharing it on the Board but attaching an agent's name to it, I don't see that you'd need Permission for that.

hS

If you've read any of her author interviews, or just about anything else she's said, it's clear that she really is 100% sincere. She honestly believes that Edward is the single most wonderful romantic interest in all of literature, and that everyone should wish that they were Bella.

The book's details are even well-documented. It began from a dream she had, about a girl in a meadow talking to the most beautiful boy in the world, who sparkled. He was telling her that they couldn't be together because he was dangerous. Meyer was immediately captivated, and felt she had to write their story.

It's unfortunately very earnest, and that's the biggest problem with it. Were it a parody, it would be far more accepted, because that implies a self-awareness and acknowledgement that this stuff is super screwed up. Even if it had been written differently, the story of a girl deluded into thinking that a creepy monster stalker was her True Love could be an effective meta-horror story, and a very deep, cutting commentary on romanticism and naïveté. But it's presented as the most perfect happy romance ever, and that's the problem.

As much as I love the idea- and I do sorely wish it was true- I honestly can't see the woman who told her husband that if Edward came to her door, she'd run off with him in seconds as someone who'd pull off this kind of parody. Sorry.

I am rereading the series for the purposes of real-life MSTing it with my friends. Now that you mention it, things ARE pretty ridiculous - most notably the constant presence of vampires in town without anyone noticing. Sure, they take precautions, but at least A FEW people have to be suspicious by Eclipse. They were already muttering about the Cullens in New Moon, but suddenly Eclipse starts and POOF! No more suspicions, until Bella gets married at eighteen.

As I hail from a(n admittedly elitist) small town myself, I can tell you everyone would be actively discussing the Cullens immediately following the car accident in Twilight and asking some tough questions by the end of New Moon.

Also, if we're comparing Twilight to Beauty and the Beast - which I'm going to, because pudding - I think Seth Clearwater is like a shape-shifter version of Chip. I like Seth~

Let's break it down, then:

-Bella is, obviously enough, the Fairytale Princess. She's that character who bemoans her tragic state while at the same time getting everything she wants - and, big hint, ends up using The Power Of Love. Shades of Disney's Sleeping Beauty here, I suppose, or Little Mermaid, only less the 'I want to do more' and more, um, 'My boyfriend is a carnivorous predator'. To paraphrase Jay, there's never been a Disney film about /that/.

(I'm not counting Beauty and the Beast. Because I don't want to)

-Edward is Prince Charming if he were a real member of the nobility. 'I am so luscious and I want to kill you and drink your blood'. He (along with the werewolves) has that Love At First Sight (actually Sniff) thing going on, so yeah, Sparkleboy is definitely a parody. He also has shades of Peter Pan - Never Grows Up.

-Jacob is the Big Bad Wolf in his purest form - a character (wolf, in fact) who exists solely to get in the way of Twu Wuv. He's almost a thematic reversal of the Wolf, though, since rather than being unambiguously evil, he's, er, pretty much the most sympathetic character in there. If Edward is the Unattainable Noble, Jacob is the Down-to-earth Type. Edward lounges around in forests, Jacob'll help you build a motorbike.

And that is essentially how it would actually be in several Disney films. Beauty and the Beast actually works really well here - in that, bookish Belle is fascinated by the reclusive, standoffish noble Beast, while shunning the townsman Gaston. Okay, sure, Gaston is shown as a Very Bad Chap - but that's the Disney Filter in operation. He is less rich, he does not have a castle, therefore he must be bad. Jacob is poorer, lives in the woods, does not sparkle, and therefore must be Not The One.

As to the rest of the vamp!cast... well, Alice is both good and wicked fairy (think Sleeping Beauty - the good ones make prophecies, Maleficent is insane... Alice is both. Classical Seeress), Esme and Carlisle are fairly generic King and Queen characters (with which, shades of Aragorn in the Doctor-Ruler?), and the others... you've got the Wicked (or at least Grumpy) Stepsister in Rosalie, and, er, I honestly can't remember enough about Emmett and Jasper to comment.

And, you have to take The Host into account. It was written before Twilight, and it's actually not all that bad. Romance, yes (which puts it outside my usual genres), but reasonably realistic characters. Even if it is pro-Yeerk propaganda.

hS thinks too much

It's been... interesting, to say the least. Not gonna lie, I am not exactly distraught over you leaving. You made people I care for vary deeply feel uncomfortable, and bullied. On the other hand, you've also been there for me, and people I care about, so some part of me will miss you. You're a good friend to those you call friends, usually, and for that I respect you, and am grateful.

For whatever it's worth, I never held a grudge against you. Any time we disagreed, I focused purely on the matter at hand, or at least tried to. Well, except for that last time, but I got over that relatively quickly, and never really did more than make the one rather unsubtle comment.

Anyway, I'm starting to ramble just a bit, and I'm sure this is not what you want to hear, from someone you probably don't want to hear from, so I'm gonna end this here.

I'm afraid I can't say I've known you very well during my time here, but I can definitely say that I will miss you.

Your comments about the decay in the community concerns me greatly. Is there anything we can to to combat this and improve?

Happy trails to you, and I wish you the best of luck in all of your future endeavours.

I have to admit, I didn't expect this. That being said, farewell, and I hope your luck is brilliant and your life fulfilling and successful beyond here.

AV

For all of our differences, you were still an awesome person. I was really hoping that one day I could earn your respect.

All I can really say is that I'll try to do my part in improving the community.

Goodbye.

I'm not sure what to say, really, other than that I'll miss you and your presence here. You're a great person and an example of what a PPCer should be. You've always been helpful and given thorough concrit when it was needed. I'm sad to see you leave and I wish you good luck in whatever ventures you may undertake.

- Tomash, who is also bad at these kinds of posts

I'll miss you in the chat (even though I rarely go there). I saw that you posted your email, so I hope we can continue to stay in touch!

I wish things were better around here, and I hope those of us staying will be able to turn things around. I hope, someday (soon), the PPC will feel safe enough for you to return.

I'm going to miss you. I think you're a good person, and I wish we could have been better friends than we were. But I hope you know that I do consider you a friend.

I hope you can find a new hobby you can enjoy safely, and that we'll see each other around the net once in a while.

—doctorlit, who is bad at these posts

You've been a great friend and more for as long as I've been on the Board, and I'm not quite sure how it's going to be without you. It's a shame you don't feel able to stay, but I do respect your decision to leave and the reasons behind it, and I hope we won't lose contact altogether.

*lots of hugs* Take care.

...Um.

You want me to become a Permission Giver?

Seriously? o_O

Well, um, I can't honestly say I expected that... but if nobody else has objections, I will. Thank you so much. :)

- Cassie, who isn't quite sure what to say

It wouldn't be the same anymore with you gone. :( Shame that there are still serious problems and there's not enough activity. I haven't produced any form of writing here at the PPC. It felt like I haven't made a difference.

You've been here ever since I joined back in May and I feel that when you're gone, the Board will be a different place.
You were a driving force, a constant in a sea of change, and I will be sorry to see you go. I had hoped that you would stay long enough to see me apply for Permission (which I am working on at the moment, I just keep getting distracted) and that you would give me the concrit I needed to make it worthy.
I'm sorry that you haven't felt safe here and I'm also sorry that I cannot see everything that is wrong, because the Board has been this way since I've joined. I hope that you will not hold a grudge against us and if you find it in your heart to come back, we will welcome you with open arms.
I do not know Cassie all that well but from what I have seen she is a very intelligent and kind person. I support your decision, even if my opinion doesn't have much weight.
I don't know how to end this post; I really don't want to have to because if I do that means I'm accepting you're gone. After all this, I think that the only thing I can say is... arrivederci.

It's a shame, but if you feel you must go, then I'll leave you to it.

Though I haven't been around much, and haven't seen how things are going bad... Hm, kinda puts my own plans for putting up missions in perspective... dang.

Anyway, good luck to you and your future endeavors.

I really don't know what to say. Nothing I can think of can even begin to do this goodbye justice.
For as long as I've been here, it always seemed that you were the one that kept things running. You told people what they couldn't do and why they couldn't do it. You weren't afraid to tell people the cold, hard truth about their writing. I would love to be able to convince you to stay, but you seem to be set in your decision, as you always are. So goodbye July. Go out and share your talents with others. Become an editor, it seems like the perfect job for you. But always remember that if you ever decide to come back there will be people here to welcome you.

Sorry to see you going and wishing you all the best for your future endeavours whether in fandom or elsewhere.

I hope the PPC can learn from this and change back to what we used to be, to the point where you might feel not averse to coming back one day.

Thanks indeed for all the fish, and may the wind always be at your back.

Elcalion, sorrowful

I'm not really that good with goodbyes, but ... thanks for everything you've done for me July. You, with your brutally honest comments about me did sort of help me get more used to the PPC, and helped me tone down my annoyingness on the Internet ... I hope.

It'll be sad to see you go, but I hope you can continue to be a brilliant critic wherever you may end up.

Maybe one day I'll run into you again, but for now, farewell.

I haven't really been here long, especially not compared to some people, but it was nice to know you during that time. I think, the only times I really remember speaking to you would be when you were telling me to stop accidentally spamming the board, but it was nice to know you, and I was grateful for the help in pointing out things like that, and, um...
...I have no clue what I'm supposed to say. Damn my awkward.
But yeah, um, goodbye.

Godspeed. Perhaps we'll see you again.

hS

Farewell, wherever you fare, until your eyrie receives you at your journey's end. And may the wind under your wings bear you where the sun sails and the moon walks. And don't die.

All I can say is this, July: wherever you go from here, no matter where you end up, keep sporking. Keep giving concrit to authors who need it. And, most importantly of all, never forget what it use to be. Maybe some day your internet wanderings or simple nostalgia will take you back here. And when that day comes, hold out hope that things will be better. Many of us are new: that won't stop us from calling people out on being jerks. I don't care how long someone has been around; if they're being unpleasant, I'll kick their flank into next Wednesday. The decent person may be a dying breed, but we're not done yet, you hear me?

Good luck, Flame. Good luck.

I may not have been here long, but even in that brief period I've come to know you as a force for good writing. While you may not be staying here, I know that you'll spread good concrit wherever you go. Thanks for the character advice, too.

Be well and best of luck to you, JulyFlame! *Bows*

As I've been on the PPC only in the last two years, I can't say anything about the difference between now and before, but I can say for sure that there are unresolved issues around here. And I'll stop here, to avoid another uncivil discussion to spring up.

I'm sad to see that you are leaving. But if you aren't feeling safe here, I guess it can't be helped. I hope you'll find other communities in which you can stay enjoying every moment without worries.

Farewell, July. I hope to see you again somewhere in the Web.

I thought about putting about half a page of text here, but then I realized it might be simpler to use one word.

Farewell.

To me, it means what it says. Fare well. Have a nice time after the PPC. Good luck.
I may not have known you well, but I hope you have better luck in the future.

-Ivan

I know I'm new, and I know I never had the chance to meet you or get to know you, but I'm sad (and angry) to hear that the community has become bad enough that you feel it's time to leave. Hopefully the PPC can come together - newbies and old bones alike - and get back to what we're here for.

I hope whatever your next adventure is, it will be just as crazy and exciting as the PPC used to be. Good fortune to you. -bows-

I'm now going to bludgeon the voice in my head trying to apologize on behalf of everyone, because it's not my fault you've felt unsafe for nearly two years and so it's not my place to attempt apologies. As someone who cares for your mental well-being, I say this is a very good move on your point.

You've been a force for good writing here, and I'm glad of it. I'm probably going to attempt to follow in your footsteps in that regard, wherever they might lead.

Now, a question: as one of your Little Sibs, I feel the need to ask what's going to happen with us. ThatOne and loomCAT and I could use your sage advice: how are we doing? Are we productive members of society yet? :P

Welcome back.

It certainly looks interesting! I plan to fool around with it later for agent design. And for plain old fun. Especially the latter.

*clickety*

When I get permission in 5000 years, I'll definitely use this!

... but have some cake anyway!

You do so, happily. Then you DISAPPEARIFY into the past a gift of Essence of Squee and a note that says:

When I became a man grew up I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up.

- J. R. R. Tolkien

That quote is definitely attributed correctly. Yes sir. No misattributions here, that would be far too like the original comic!

She finds the Board a bit intimidating still, but she figures perpetually lurking isn't going to do anyone any good. She doesn't know anyone very well, and she's late in sending PitViperOfDoom her intentions that said Boarder has an awesome birthday.

Durppie couldn't care any less. Her fingers type out what she hopes to be an adequate response.

"Hi there! I hope you have (or had) a cool birthday. Sorry I'm late, by the way."

After she finishes her message, the newbie pauses for a second. What would be a nice gift for this person? A glance to the cake storage revealed none of the delicious dessert was left from when the Cake Thieves paid her a visit. Muttering curse words under her breath, Durppie frantically looks around for a present.

There.

The newbie walks over to her sword pile, which happens to be next to the sord...... pile and carefully takes out some swords. All are in fair condition. She checks to make sure they aren't too damaged, and accidentally sendificates her entire sord...... pile instead. Goshdarnit.

Durppie hopes PitViperOfDoom likes sord......s!

She checks the Board as she does fairly regularly and notices is has been PitViperOfDoom's birthday. She doesn't know where this person is in relation to both herself and the date line, so she sends birthday wishes and a virtual iced-sponge-cake along with apologies in case she was late. She also sends a virtual cake-storage-unit to keep all the various virtual cakes in, because there is no way somebody could eat that much cake at once.

She regrets being late to a fellow PPCer's birthday, and gives pumpkin cake.

Wait. What pumpkin? That's just normal cake.

He's not really familiar with Homestuck at all, and is rather sleepy and confused. However, he still wishes the young lady a happy birthday before lumbering off to bed.

Happy birthday, Pit Viper!
Happy birthday of doom!

After some thought, she offers up a triple chocolate (chocolate with chcolate chips and chocolate icing) cupcake.

Happy Birthday!

She is trying to resist the urge to actually get up. Going to the Board, she discovers that it is the birthday of a member she has always liked and held in esteem. Lacking a supply of online gifts, she immediately summons her instant solution as a birthday gift, after first swearing at her very irritating spellcheck that occasionally doesn't wait for her to finish the word. That done, she finds the gift she wants and posts it here...

...before wishing PitViperOfDoom a very happy birthday and relishing her use of the third person, which she does not often get to use.

She has several fanfiction projects lined up on her screen and an unholy number of tabs open for research and other things, but as soon as she visits the Board she notices this particular thread. She promptly removes her arms from her dresser to fetch the cake in her box on the bed, and jabs at her Remote Activator. Soon she has portalled it over the interwebs to PitViperOfDoom, wishing her a happy birthday.

And the Italian young man wants to say "Happy Birthday" to the young lady.

She is waiting for her episode of Doctor Who to load and, as is reflex, she checks the Board for any new interesting posts. She sees the post by PitViper and grins because it has given her an opportunity to eat digital cake and play Pin-the-Tail-on-the-Balrog. She also finds it necessary to point out that almost everyone on the Board is older than her, as she is only fifteen. She then gets over it because it's not really that big a deal and she should quit whining. She offers PitViper a large colorful cake and then shoves it in her face, as is tradition. She then runs away.

A young madwoman sits at her laptop, trying to figure out how to respond. She does not usually write in this style, so she gives up and goes back to her regular style.
Happy Birthday PitViper! I love birthdays, they give me chances to hand out cupcakes. Like this one! *pulls cupcake out of formerly empty top hat* Chocolate with chocolate frosting, chocolate sprinkles, and a molten chocolate center!

Happy birthday to you!

*brings out a large cake covered in edible glitter*

Squeeing out loud is a habit I've not yet managed to break, and I'm older than you. :P

He wishes he had a chair. He ponders what to post to the Board. He hits refresh.

He sees it is somebody's birthday.

He conjures up a digital cake (with electron filling and photon icing) and hands it over with great solemnity.

He wishes her a happy birthday.

He very seriously takes a plastic trumpet out of his pocket and blows into it.

Once.

He leaves the way he came.

(He is) hS

After reading the "Fourth Wall Mail Slot" trope on TvTropes I realized it would be a fun thing to have PPC Agents answer to random "fan" questions.
Or maybe "Ask the Sunflower Official".

A bit like this (from the webcomic Misfile):
http://www.misfile.com/askash.page?lastViewed=1

Sure, it would be a tricky thing to find a way to make it work, but it sounds funny.

(Yes, in addition to the Spiderweb. This one will take you literally five minutes, so I figure you'll handle it)

The PPC Community Poster will be a tiled mosaic of the PPC Wiki logo, made up of the pictures you send in instead of pixels. For your part, all you (yes, you - even if you've only been here five minutes, you're still a member of the PPC community!) have to do is send in your picture - and your name. These don't have to be sent together - separate emails, separate email addresses, or an anonymous email with a note here to say you've sent, I don't care. I just want to be able to put a credits list in.

As to 'your picture', that can be any of the following (although it's vastly preferable to send in the first):

-A photograph of yourself.
-A photograph of yourself when you were unrecognisably younger.
-A digitally modified photo of yourself.
-A drawing (/painting/etc) of yourself.
-A doll-maker image of yourself (/Sims portrait/whatever - but try to make it look like you).
-A photo of something you think symbolises you.

It cannot be any of the following:

-A photo of someone else. The only exception to this is photos of animals - but I would prefer that they be ones you have taken yourself, not one you pulled off the first page of Google.
-Clipart. That's just lazy.
-Anything that would raise the raiting or discomfort level. Photos of you with no clothes on making a rude gesture with one hand while hugging Fidel Castro with the other are not appropriate (although the CIA might want to talk to you...).
-In a non-standard format which requires me to search the internet for something that reads .zqr files.

My email address is above, or can be reached simply as my username at hotmail dot com.

(And if you have something you'd like to send in but you're not sure it fits, heck, send it anyway. Inclusion is more fun that rules-lawyering)

hS, hoping this works

There is a Spiderweb by now, but why not to attempt others too? I personally can't quite pick a favourite, but currently rooting for Poster. I don't sing very well - some practice needed - and CYOA could get really messy. So yes, poster.
While sending in pictures could get "don't give out information" alarm for some people, we could make some turns in there. Maybe let people draw pictures of themselves (or Agents, if they have) and send those - paint-people aren't probably that easily recognizable as photo-people. Or a picture of something that they think symbolizes them (I'm still attempting to make a PPC uniform, that means DMS flash patch).

Or a PPC live action film, where only problem (and a big problem) is getting participants in the same place. I sometimes imagine missions as really fancy cop shows... my brain has clearly seen too much TV crime.

While each option seems fun, there are a few flaws that io'd like to point out:

1) For the first and second option, it would require sending in pictures and videos which, if you're like me and you've had it drilled into your head not to share personal information/ pictures/ amorous messages with people on the internet, is something that many people would be reluctant to do.

2)Also for the first one, many people have voiced their concern about not being able to sing, which doesn't really matter as we're not auditioning for Broadway, but less people are going to want to share if their singing is not up to par, diminishing from the choir effect. Also, I don't have any means of recording myself.

3)The third option seems the most feasible in terms of everyone agreeing on it and participating, but a) how will we end it and b) how can we make sure that the quality of writing is up to snuff, especially if it has a lot of different options to sort through.

4) Though yo've already started the spiderweb, I need to point out that doing it by agents would not include anyone who does not have permission and, as I said below, many people's agents do not interact with the agents of other authors.

All that being said, I think the CYOA would probably work out the best, as long as it's kept under control. Maybe have deadlines for the story to end, or a maximum amout of links per story line? Dunno, but I'd really like to work on something like that.

And on the Wiki, too!

So far it contains only my agents (as taken from my User page), but the system for you to add yours to the Master List is in place. I'll upload a new version in about a day, if anyone feels like contributing...

hS

The CYOA sounds neat, but like lots of stuff to do. And for the choir, while I approve of the idea, my microphone sucks and I really don't have a good voice. Not to mention that I can't sing!!1

But I'd be in for the poster.

I like the Community Spiderweb and Community Poster ideas. I wouldn't be able to participate in the Choir one, since I don't have very good recording equipment. I am also tentatively in favor of the CYOA, because that kind of seems like a huge undertaking.

I can't really sing very well at all, but I might blend into the background of the choir all right. Seriously that is the most awesome idea I've ever heard.

The community poster is also an amazing idea.

And even though the spider-web isn't not about writing, I really, really love that idea.

The CYOA is not a bad idea, but I'm not as excited about it as I am about the others.

This is a great post. Thank you.

All right, I'll probably jump on the CYOA bandwagon because everyone else is. But I think it would be awesome to have a Six Degrees of PPC Agent Separation-esque page in the works.

I think I'll go with the CYOA.

I particularly like the Choir and Choose-Your-Own-Adventure ideas.

Maybe, with the choir we could do two or three songs, so everyone can get to do a song they actually recognize? >.>

I'm particularly fond of the choir proposal, myself. I've never done anything like that before, and it sounds like a lot of fun.

The first two appeal rather a lot. I like singing, and I have no particular worries about anyone being overcome with the desire to find and stalk me if they see my pizza face on the internet. :p

That sounds fun! But I wonder, would t be possible to make two different offshoots of one prompt? Like, page A has options 1 and 2, and Boarders John and Jane fill those two options. Could Boarder James write a second version of option 2? It might get complicated real quick, but it would also allow for a more complex story.

Although you do /not/ want to hear my singing voice! Very keen on the last three and would participate (although not super keen) in the first.

Plus, it will let people who haven't had any experience with working on the wiki try their hand at editing.

And the spiderweb thing would be cool. I would be willing to help out with it.