Nov 2010 Archive, part a

Some of you may have noticed that I've friended you already, but if not, I'm Neshomeh over there, as well. I have no frelling clue what I'm going to do, since I can't make up my mind, but if I DO get something done, you'll hear about it there. {= )

~Neshomeh

I planned to do it but have so much school stuff to do that I cannot. Gambatte, everyone!

It'll be my first attempt at NaNo. The name's the same if you want to keep track (if I remember to update).

Sorry for the ignorance, but... what's NaNoWriMo?

I'm in! Hooray!

Three years running I just forgot. D:

But! Diving in this year. Headfirst. MakariCrow if you care to find me. Best of luck to everyone, and I hope your writing goes (relatively) smoothly!

I did it in 2009, tried last year, and I'm not going to attempt it this year. I have way to much work to do. I hope you people have fun.

My name, in the usual boring plane, is VixenMage there.

(I'm writing under the name Piromancer, if anyone wants to find me)

I suppose I could join this, though I have already written an entire novel in the past year...

Lemme get back to you on this. :)

I'll probably still be checking in periodically just so you guys know I haven't, y'know, passed out or died or anything, but other than that, I'll be pretty quiet. For thsoe of you who want to follow my progress/keep tabs, I'm Pretel over there as well. I'll probably be posting occasional snippets of my story on my personal LJ as time goes on; you're welcome to follow me there as well.

And yeah, I'm definitely with you on that and not procrastinating from NaNo at all!

The orientation spectrum is far from a toggle-switch from "homosexual" to "heterosexual," and to assume so is... well, ignorant. And terribly insensitive to the people on the map (it's really more of a three-dimensional sort of blob, with points plotted out to the infinite decimal place on the x, y, and z axis) who don't fit one's definition-- which is generally the overwhelming majority, whether we realize it or no.

So once you realize that there is no real "norm" status for a relationship, nor an ideal relationship, really (besides the ideal that all people are happy, and not deceiving or being deceived, and there is love-- though I've gathered that plenty of people don't really want a relationship with Love, either, so... uh, yeah), to impose strict guidelines on people as to what makes their relationship "legitimate" is again, ignorant and rather stupid, if not outright X-phobic. Some people want to get married-- good for them. Some people believe marriage is a conspiracy by the Church to trick guys into being figuratively gelded, but still want a monogamous, loving relationship with kids. Some people are polyamorous. Some people are asexual, but have the desire to raise a child. Some people are monogamous and more-or-less straight, but don't have any strong feelings one way way or the other about children (hi!).

The sooner our society grows the hell up and realizes that, the sooner we can stop witch-hunting everything that doesn't fit the given plot-points of The Perfect Relationship, and learn to live and let live. And I mean that every bit as much in the fictional sphere as the Real Life one.

(You know the really scary part? That is the clearest way I can phrase it. Ow.)

There are pairings where it would make total sense for the guys in question to want a kid, whether by adoption, mpreg, or surrogacy. Some guys canonically like kids and wouldn't be happy without a few of their own eventually. Others are blatantly unsuited, and then it's not good, but I don't think it's particularly worse than giving a kid to fantastically unsuitable straight couples. Saying any relationship needs a baby is wrong, but there are some that do and some that don't.

(And, in fact, same-sex couples do have various means of acquiring a baby, depending on location.)

Um, I know it's kind of off-topic, but the link you posted to fanficrants doesn't seem to be working. Just saying because it might be pesky for those who want to know more before getting into this discussion.

As I see it, romance stories always seek an "end" - something that will 'guarantee' that the couple will continue to live Happily Ever After once the screen has faded to black and the book cover has closed. In many cases this means a wedding - look at how many movies, particularly children's movies, end with a wedding. Having a child tends to be treated in the same way, at least by most of the fanfic writers I've read. The point that either a wedding or a child does not by any means make it certain that the couple will be happy together forever is not, apparently, relevant.

I also think that many fanfic writers accept the 'norm' of a Happy Marriage requiring a child simply because they have internalised it as the way every life goes, even if that's not true; barring infertility or some other angst-worthy (they think) obstacle, I imagine a lot of the thought processes involved are less along the lines of "would these two characters be the kind to want to have and raise a child?" and more like, "why not? Everyone does!" And thus even couples who are in no position to sensibly choose to have a family (characters who are criminals, for example, always on the run or whatnot) end up being written as doing so anyway, because it's 'the norm'.

I don't think the gender of the pairings actually has anything to do with it. Ficcers are a persistant bunch; the only obstacle they seem to face with slash pairings is that they can't use the convenient "accidental pregnancy" plot device - and even that, they get around. Personally, I read het romance, and avoid slash, but I don't see any homophobia in the "one and one is three" notion - just biology, and rather naive perceptions of what real romantic relationships are actually like.

There's my two cents :)

So are you angry because het norms exist or because het norms are forced on slash pairings... or... ?

Why is it bad in a slash pairing but not in a het one?

I'm rather tired, which may explain the turtle like speed my brain is moving... excuse me if that's a redundant question... but I find it's better to be sure on the topic before jumping in. That's like doing a dive headfirst into the Amazon without checking for pirahnas, or something along those lines...

One must consider that in more civilized countries (hint hint :P) homosexual couples can adopt or have children in other ways, so I don't see it as strictly a heterosexual norm.

I don't think that the trope itself is really sensible. Until a point, I suppose a large family had benefits such as the parents having people to take care of them when they got older. These days that concept persists in some sense (the idea that lots of children is great) while everyone seems to ignore that just having more children won't necessarily make anything better.

Well, I don't think that is really the intended message, altough I'll admit I might be wrong as I generally avoid romance stories. I too really dislike it when heterosexual norms are forced on either heterosexual or homosexual couples. (Stereotypes! Argh!) I think that the reason the authors add babies is the "aww factor" or because they want the readers to be able to relate to the family (and also, by abiding to norms that have been successful in other stories, they try to make their own stories successful). But of course, the intent of the author varies from person to person.

Do it with a leopard, and you might see spots,
Have fun with a snake, just don't tie it in knots,
Why not bugger a bat, if it will come to your call,
But the hedgehog can never be buggered at all!

Get down with a whale, but beware of its tail,
If you take your time, you can bugger a snail,
Take up a chimp, it's just so cute, the doll,
But the hedgehog can never be buggered at all!

Go take on a rhino, but don't pick the wrong horn,
Put it up to a sheep, best before it's been shorn,
Maybe comfort a gull that's been caught in a squall,
But the hedgehog can never be buggered at all!

Go bugger a wolf, and I'm sure you will howl,
A chicken is fun, though at times a bit fowl,
Give your dog a whistle, you might have a ball,
But the hedgehog can never be buggered at all!

Whooooo! Sing it with me, boys and girls!

I've never read anything discworld related until then, and it wasn't until near the end that I realized what it was about. Can I have my soul back, please?

There are actually a lot of orginizations like that, the Anti-Mary Sue Initive, the Anti-Mary Sue And Cliche Coalition, and whatever he just started. You would think the Suethors would get the point already.

Is an anit someone who fights Sues, like an agent? Or maybe it's a kind of animal, like a ypur.

Anyway, that's an interesting post. Do you know if he's the only writer for that Initiative?

Now the "hide" option actually works, and they added an "other" option along with the usual "male" and "female."
Progress! :)

Someone linked to a site which supposedly lets you, but it won't work on my computer.

...got the frilly tunic.

You can have a frilly tunic. You also get a trench coat, a fedora, a pocket watch, and a tuxedo cat named Piccadilly.

Have some chocolate anyways. It will make you feel better.

Hi! have a slim jim! you don't really need to worry, I used to write horrible self inserts, I think most of us have been there at one point or another.

Have a living hedgehog pincushion to store your pointy things, and an assorted set of metallic sporks, for all your supernatural-beastie-slaying needs.

Here's a naginata, good for spearing things.

Have a half-brick in a sack (useful blunt object) and this five pound bag of assorted candy.

And don't worry about the badfic. I used to have a Sue, till I learned what Sues were and she got redone on the spot. Part of the learning process, I suppose...

I myself once ran an RP forum that crossed Harry Potter and Star Wars. We've all got our fair share of literary shames to cringe at, but it's the fact that we've been willing to improve that makes the PPC what it is.

That aside - welcome aboard. Have a Generic Weapon; give it a little description (but not too much) and keep it handy for your first Sue slaying. Happy sporking.

Have a set of shuriken. Also, was the Drow in question anything like Drizzt?

Here's the link to an interesting webcomic based on the works of H.P. Lovecraft. Not only is the comic really good (in my opinion), but it's also great fun picking out all the references to Lovecraft's stories and characters. Updates are almost daily.

Ow My Sanity

And remember: ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn. Very few people know it, but if you recite that verse at the top of your lungs thirteen times in the middle of a Louisiana swamp, in the light of a full moon and with your eyes closed, something uber-cool will happen in less than a year. I myself did so about eight months ago and...

...

Hey, I just sprouted a tentacle. Awesome.

Hai there,
Welcome to the Board!

Don't worry about the badfic, as everyone has said, we've all written some real crap at some time or other!

Take this invisible flying sheep and this statuette from Y'ha-nthlei. Just don't look at it for too long, or you might start losing your mind. That or grow gills, I never did finish investigating it.

I'm sure that some agents will be happy to kill that badfic for you. Or, if you're willing to wait a while and try for permission, then you could kill it yourself.
Welcome aboard!

Welcome, new friend!

Have a Cthulhu tentacle! Use it to wipe clean the minds of man! Just try to get rid of it before Cthulhu returns to destroy us all; he wasn't too happy to lose it in the first place, and he might make your destruction extra-fatal.

Fair winds!

Now you can throw parties!

Welcome to the Board! Here,have some chocolate, and enjoy your stay.

And don't worry about the badfic, it even happens of the best of us. I've done it myself, and seek to atone for my sins by becoming an agent.

So relax, you won't be judged.

If nothing else, be glad that you saw the PPC and realized your mistake so you can improve in the future. Besides, we've all got badfic in our background, I myself was writing a bunch of horrible roleplays before I found the PPC.

Anyways, welcome to the board, have a Sunflower Official bobblehead.

Don't feed it Sues or Stus.

The only reason I didn't write badfic is that I wasn't into fanfiction. Other than that, I had lots of goofy stories.

Oh, and have some cookies. They're made of awesome, which will help you here.

Welcome to the Board. *sympathetic hug* I think most of the PPC's members have written badfic at one time or another. Don't feel too bad about it. I was writing badfic (none published, thankfully) up till I found the PPC, back in April 2008. Just enjoy your time here and go slowly insane. :P

Also, have a bag of pebbles and a Random Shiny Object. They should come in handy when fighting badfic.

Don't worry, I did even worse before joining the PPC ranks. A good thing I never published any of my early fics, but I'm going to kill my old self insertion characters anyways in a "strange" mission (actually a ounishment by the Flowers, since my agents kinda messed up in my last, still beta-status mission)

However, have a folding car. If folds up and becomes a rather heavby case when not in use. Careful, do not put it near fragile things. The folding mechanism is not very reliable.

Hiya! Don't worry about the badfic, we've all done it. I used to write horrible self-inserts before I discovered why they were bad.

Anyway, have a pet cat. You may name it whatever you wish, so long as it is a nerdy in-joke.

Well met, rookie! Please enjoy this wooden baseball bat with the word 'Skullcrusher' engraved in it as a welcoming gift.

Have a Paranoiac's Friend (tm) Mark VII camera! It runs for over three weeks without recharging and has a complicated shut-off sequence so people can't turn it off*! Now with thumbtack attachment for bugging places, people, and other nouns! Paranoiac's Friend: for the paranoiac in all of us!

(*Including, probably, you. Good luck with that.)

I just joined three days ago, and I'm pleased to see that I already have seniority over someone. :D I understand that it's customary to give you bizarre gifts, so have an Ominous Box. Don't open it and make sure to pass it to someone else as soon as possible.

Many agents have started by taking on one of their own atrocities. Others felt more comfortable to save missioning their own work until later.

but I'm still going to say that I admire you for your honesty and your willingness to admit your past mistakes.

Also, don't feel bad about it. We've all gone Suethor in the past, at one time or another, even if those Sues were only in the stories we built in our heads. God knows they were in mine.

So, pleased to meet you. Have a bag of cookies. Careful, they're semi-sentient.

"IT KNOWS OUR PAIN"

We shall take it further than this comic! *tentacle salute*

I love QC! This comic means my day is made.
Also, I agree with said comic. Show, don't tell.

Writing lesson #1: The readers cannot read your mind; if you want them to get it, you must describe things.

Writing lesson #2: Sometimes the readers would rather you didn't.

Thanks for sharing. {= )

~Neshomeh

Naylor and Sherer (the artist of Badly Drawn Kitties) used to share characters and work on individual comics set within the same universe. They had a huge falling-out and "split up", but continued to use the co-made characters. Thus, it's not fanfic, it's co-writing, therefore it's not under our jurisdiction.

Should comic-sporks be done in comic format? That might be kind of fun, although time-consuming.
...And I don't know whether it's possible to spork this, since I'd have to look at it and look at the original to form some sort of opinion. And even then, I wouldn't be the one to ask.
I think a written sporking of a comic would be fun, but making a comic to spork a comic would work too, no?

My Inner Life? Seriously? Dude, I'm reading an MSTed version of that thing right now. It's hideous! If you can PPC that, I'll salute you, then shower you with cookies.

I think you may be confused as to what you are actually looking for. It seems to me that you are asking for your story to be used in a mission, which is a strange request.

Now, what you might actually need is a Beta-reader. That is a service that we, as well as others on the internet, provide where someone reads your story and offers suggestions about how you might make the story better. We would point out things like spelling, punctuation, and grammar as well as the aforementioned Mary Sue's and Marty Stu's. Then you take the suggestions and use them as a tool to edit your story and increase the quality.

Anyways, if you are interested in finding a Beta, I am sure that someone around here would be willing to help.

Have a nice day,
-Phobos

http://community.chaoticgame.com/forum/Topic1207802-58-1.aspx

Oops. I'm such a scatterbrain.

Shaun of the Dead:
SOTDBy Gracie Wainright
Summary: Sroey by Gracie Wainright submitted to my website
Rated: K+
Sample: "Get Down!" she said calmly. Shaun immediately jumped to the floor. She started to shoot arrows at all these vampires. Every shot was on target, straight through the heart.

Jurassic Park:
The Dinosaur King's Mate
Summary: What would happen if a man was ship wreaked on Isla Nublar? What if that man stumbled upon the scientist lab where they keep the entire dinosaur DNA? And what do you think would happen if this said man drank all the DNA's. full sum inside... LEMONS!
Rated: M
Sample: Melena snapped her head up, and in perfect Spinosaurus language she crooned, "What is it?"
Note: The Stu can turn into any dinosaur, so Agents beware. Also? DNA does not work like that!

Chronicles of Riddick:
Chaos Unleashed
Summary: its the usual story with a new character. Another Con transported with the HG peeps what Chaos will She unleash? first posted story read or not up to the story surfers
Rated: T
Sample: That position and the title Heir to the Hunter, a title of great respect, gave me all the resources I needed to pass through the education system as blood through the heart. That's how I know this shit . . . ooh, I just got the tinglies all down my spine, something A LOT more dangerous than I, just got aboard this ship.

Harry Potter:
Ival Pythonica
Summary: A deadly curse is placed on Megan Malfoy forcing her into sex with Snape and Lupin every day for seven days to save her life. What happens when a man who loves her must share her with one of his longest standing enemies? OFC, F/M, WIP.
Rated: M
Sample: You are studying too hard! You're even doing circles around Hermione Granger, which is saying something!" [McGonagall] huffed in horror.
Note: Good God, what a Sue! Is a Malfoy, in Slytherin house yet just un-Slytherin enough to like muggle-borns and werewolves, better than Hermione at school, and boinks her teachers. Did the author use a checklist or something?

The Mummy:
Love is a Curse
Summary: Rick loves Imhotep loves Anck-su-namun loves Evelyn loves Ardeth loves Jonathan loves Ardeth, and Alex is disturbed.
Rated: M
Sample: Imhotep ripped off Rick's pants and underwear in one quick swipe. With another flick of his arm, his black robes were off, revealing his dazzling bear chest.
Notes: DAZZLING BEAR CHEST! I'm so claiming this one.

I kind of got lost in Dwarf Fortress recently. I liked this mission. These two are pretty good together. I liked the bit about the Sue making Bella Swan look deep, and that line actually being a charge that Caleb wrote down. Also liked the bit about Kestrel throwing her knife at his throat at full force, because she knew it would bounce off. I saw a couple of typos.

I don't know the canon at all, but I'd watch a movie starring Stephen Fry and Orlando Bloom.;)

triggered a few paragraphs worth of inner turmoil concerning her own love live with the as-of-yet unseen “John”.

and they can shove the thing in test tube. Fine with you?”

This is absolutely brilliant. Congratulations on a very funny mission indeed. And yes, the GO fandom is generally pretty good; the Official Fanfic University for it is actually a summer school attended by about twelve people in all. :P It's still being written and all, but it's good.

Um, waffling over now. >.

Good fun. Interesting fic.

I do have to make one tiny little nitpick. (It's because I care. :P)
When you have a new thought, but the same speaker, it is acceptable to create a new paragraph instead of making a gigantic block of text or stuffing in speech tags willy-nilly. One denotes that it is the same speaker by leaving off the end quote of the paragraph before! Like so.

"Lalalalalala kookaburra sits in the old gum tree, merry merry king of the bushes he.

"And like so. Except with more text."

It's a perfectly acceptable grammatical practice, if my English knowledges haven't suddenly decided to lead me off a cliff.

Aside from that, though, Kestrel and Caleb are immensely hilarious to watch interact. Reeeeally interesting logic that 'fic had.

(Also FF-net has been eating linebreaks of late.)

I do like that Caleb is still definitely /vampire/, despite the sparkly etc. Seems like a fun partnership. :)

I write on a roleplay site, so the ability to detect power gamers/ metagamers/ GODMODDING JERKS is quite necessary... Unfortunately a lot of people don't care about proper character balance and just attempt to make characters as powerful as possible while thiefing names like there's no tomorrow, like the sod who called his character "Raistlin Majere" and somehow knew Force Healing AND Force Devastation while still claiming to be a Gray Jedi. Gray Jedi are NOT able to use both Light and Dark side powers, they merely have less conventional respect for authority. [/rant]

And of course, the people who make Gratuitous Canon Offspring when the character is a gentleman and would NEVER have done that. *Stares at one particular "son of Qui-Gon Jinn" that nearly sent me into fits of rage*

Aside from my roleplaying, Tv Tropes has made me sensitive in terms of works I am neutral towards or dislike... It does make me realize certain things about my favorite works, but even if my favorite characters are "the scrappy" or considered "annoying", I don't really mind because they're my favorites.

It does sorta help that several of my best friends and I are TV Tropers, and have used Tropes to describe ourselves and our RP characters, I suppose.

The last fic I read (a funny crossover between Card Captor Sakura and Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha) was full of "errors", but still enjoyable since it was more of a comedy/parody, I shouldn't have cared about plotholes and non-canonical things in the first place. However, I still found myself doing a sort of "charge list", despite it was not a sporkable fic.

But I don't find problems doing that, I still enjoy what I read.

I don't watch much TV anymore, not fiction anyway. I watch some chatshows, cooking programs and the occasional sketch show. At least in the latter it is intentionally (I think) if the characters do something that isn't the most sensical thing.

I do try to read more fiction. Currently reading Chart Throb, a parody of shows like X Factor and Pop Idol. I'm afraid I'm not ready yet for fiction without humorous intent: spotting a plot hole can pull one out of the story, and that's not a nice feeling.

I don't think being able to detect plot holes and Sues is a bad thing, is it? Yes, you're now aware that a lot of commercially published stuff could be better; but really, is that so much of a loss? If you like to write, you want to write well, don't you?

I also browse TvTropes alot, and after finding out that multiple characters I liked/tolerated were considered "annoying", it made me a bit paranoid about characters like them, and also turned me off certain series.

*COUGH*StarTrektheNextGeneration*cough*.

...Is that what you mean?

...and I think I know what you're talking about, after all, it's quite common for people who frequent that site. I sort of do the same thing, except it manifests in the form of snarky comments directed at the characters of a certain TV show or something.

When you feel like that, try to remember what situation the characters are in - if you were in a base locked down and bugged, would you stay inside? I usually do that and laugh at how stupidly I would react in that situation, and that'd make me feel better about any daft decisions characters make.

If this doesn't help, I'm sorry, but I can't think of anything else that could help you. =(

Friendly writers are friendly writers.

Down to business. I don't really have a problem like you're describing -- or, rather, this happens, but I don't see it as a problem. I'll see something like that in a show or a book, and if I like it enough despite of or indeed because of that, I ignore it. If I can't ignore the plot holes large enough to fly a starship through and the sparkly lieutenant swooning all over the captain, then I ask myself: 'Why am I even watching this?' If it's crap writing and thoroughly dislikable, why am I bothering? Saves me a whole bunch of time. ; )

It sounds like this isn't quite what you find yourself going though, but you did ask for 'similar'. I hope you manage to sort this out and start enjoying thing again. : )

Technically, PPC Missions are against their rules, so if someone spots it, it might be deleted.

But if there's some reason why you really, really don't want to... well, no one will hunt you down with an axe, promise :)

Plugging a mission on the Board makes it easier for people to see and read it, while adding a fic to the Claimed Badfic list cuts down on the risk of someone else taking the fic from under you while you're still writing the mission.

n. I will not give copies of "Twilight" or any of its sequels to vampire characters in more 'gritty' settings.
- n.a. Especially not Alucard, in the "Hellsing" manga or OVA.
- n.b. Even more especially if I include a map.
- n.c. And a conveniently placed portal.
- n.d. And a handwritten note, detailing exactly how to bypass the cast's fortune telling earl warning system.
- n.e. And another SR-71 Blackbird.
- n.f.In fact, I'm not allowed to open/enter portals to "Helling" in general.
n+1. No matter what continuum I claim to be from, a black cloak and Guy Fawkes mask is never acceptable formal-wear.
n+2. The "Forget-me-stick" is not an acceptable replacement for my neuralizer.
n+3. I am not allowed to kill off RPG warrior Stus by dropping them off in "Tucker's Kobolds"
n+4. I am no longer allowed to requisition/fire/obtain/touch the following weapons without express written permission of at least three more senior PPC agents: void grenade, harkannon, minigun, sack full of adamantium power doorknobs, dobie-o-matic, wave motion gun.

I shall not spend days thinking of a proper speech so I can feel just as epic as Barid starting the foodfight.

I shall not under any circumstances start a foodfight, speech or not.

I shall not under any circumstances /promote/ a foodfight

I shall not under any circumstances point my CAD at Bella Swan to see what interesting smells it gives out when it explodes.

I shall not point out to our minority group of Twilighters that Bella Swan's initials are... well, you know.

I will not in any way mention the C-word during normal Board discussions, for fear of resurrecting potentially scarring memories. *too late*

. Confetti cannons filled with glitter? Very Bad Idea.
- Confetti cannons filled with sugar? Also not a good idea.
- Confetti cannons filled with anything but confetti are not a good idea.
- Confetti cannons are, in fact, not a good idea whatever they contain.

###. Keep any and all characters from musical continua out of the Spellsinger verse, please. Thank you.

###. A celebrity's public persona, no matter how inaccurate or Suvian, is not a fictional character. So stop trying to assassinate Taylor Swift.
- Also, the Bad Slash agent attempting to exorcise any celebrities appearing in the gossip columns will be punished.

###. "My Immortal" is a better song than it is a fic. But still, blasting it regularly is unlikely to lead to anything good.
- Whoever found the dance remix, STOPPIT.

• MSTed fanfics to the contrary, Murdoc Niccals, despite being a cartoon character, does not have Malletspace, and I am not to encourage him to believe that he does.
  -- In fact, it's a bad idea to encourage anyone to believe they have Malletspace, unless they're supposed to.
  --- It's also a bad idea to encourage people to believe they can produce large objects from other people's orifices.
  ---- Especially if that involves putting said objects there beforehand.
  - Characters who know of the PPC are not to have their memories of Molly Rath or Luxury erased. It's cruel to make anyone meet Molly or Lux for the first time more than once.
  - I will not encourage people unfamiliar with the foodstuffs in question to consume Soylent Green, Mrs Lovett's pies, Popplers, or Slurm, without telling them what said foodstuffs are made of beforehand.

*I will not hide in the background and hum main characters' theme songs during important scenes in which they appear.
-Nor will I quietly sing songs from musicals during the scenes in which they would appear in the non-musical adaptations of the same continuum.

*I will not portal into video games and attempt to beat the main characters' high scores at mini-games.

*I will not portal Agent Luxury and a demon from All-world into the same room to see who would "win."
-I will not cause other agents brain damage by making them think about what "winning" would entail in this situation.
-Or making them think about the situation at all.

*I will not portal to the Haunted Mansion for the express purpose of getting a Hitchhiking Ghost to follow me home.

1. I will not order pizza from Torgo.
   -This also applies to Ortega and catering
   1139. I will not put an MST3K Observer and a Mind Flayer in a room together 'just to see what happens'.
   1140. I will not put Giratina in an Escher Room.

1131: I will not yell "double rainbow" when I see a portal.
-the same goes for monolith travel.
1132: I will not attempt to distract the SO with a flashlight.
1133: I will not refer to the late Makes-Things as "that one Q guy".

1131: I will not refer to interns as 'furniture.'
-- Or 'decoys.'
-- Or 'test subjects,' unless said interns work in DoSAT or DMSE&R.
1132: I will not tell any of the AI agents to open the pod bay doors.
-- I will also not ask them for cake.
1133: I will not ask people if they are on Team Jacob or Team Edward.
1134: I will remember that I am not Deadpool, and so cannot break the fourth wall.
1135: I will not use my CAD to crush spiders.
1136: I will not set up a tent by the Fountain of Bleepka and claim that I am on a camping trip.
1137: I will not blame everything on Luxury.
-- Unless it actually is her fault.

Oh my God, human stupidity has no limits! I feel like barfing at these news

The fan-fiction.net owners haven't even tried to stop this yet. This is sad.

Sorry, need to rant for a bit:

Hey, RedBotton guy, if you're going to try and purge badfics from the Internet, how about following the site rules while doing it. It's called "reading the story, supplying useful advice". Try it. Maybe you'll actually get something done about it, as opposed to just irritating the Internet.

Once again, sorry about that.

Here are a couple of posts describing the situation from the opposite perspective.

http://lord-kelvin.blogspot.com/2010/08/redbootton.html

http://lord-kelvin.blogspot.com/2010/09/reflections-in-buttonwood.html

While their position seems reasonable, it's the thought that they may be reporting without thinking/automatically that worries me.

a quote from one ff.net user's profile:

I'm moving to DeviantArt, LiveJournal, Mediaminer and Adult Fanfic Net...go find out about the RedBooton issue.


* I will be on a hiatus from ff.net, possibly forever, as the RedBottom issue has simply gone too far. I'm now in an argument with LordKelvin (the creator of the damn program) and I think I'll be leaving until this is sorted. If this happens, and I don't come back, I love you all very, very much, and wish I didn't have to go. Thank you to everyone who's been with me on any of my stories, any comments made, any reviews posted, and any help given has been hugely appreciated. You've been like family to me.

xxx Lemon

CLEVERBOT IS A LIE. IF YOU LIKE ME AT ALL LISTEN. You see, the program simply connects you to another user, who believes that YOU are the robot. After a while, the users are switched which is why the conversations are so random. If you attempt to tell someone else this, you are quickly switched after only a couple of more messages.

An extract from one of my conversations:

"Cleverbot: No you're not.

User: Yes I am.

Cleverbot: No you are a machine.

User: Did you know cleverbot isn't actually a robot? It just puts you in contact to another user so you think it's a robot.

Cleverbot: Oh.

User: Now we're about to be split up because I told. I'm not even joking, that's what they do. What's your first name?

This is where we were quickly split up.

Cleverbot: Am I clever?

User: YOU'RE A LIE. YOU'RE NOT A ROBOT, YOU'RE A HUMAN BEING. WHAT'S YOUR NAME?

Cleverbot: You just said that I'm a robot.

User: No I didn't - that was someone else. The bot moves you on to another user after a while, that's why the conversations are so random, because it's not the same person.

Cleverbot: I thought of that theory, and I think I need more proof.

YOU SEE.

Me: Your mother is a prostitute.

CleverBot : Your father is a hamster.

Admittedly, that last part could be pure... well, it's probably not serious. Or completely serious. But now I'm off to research Lord Kelvin

Period.

This is a horrible idea. Similar full-auto SPaG bots have been used to patrol Wikipedia in the past, but are now forbidden due to the huge false positive rate they had. It is virtually impossible to reduce this due to the myriad ways 'bad' writing can be used on purpose. If WP has deemed such bots not-fit-for-purpose, it's probably for good reason. Even with heuristic learning (which I seriously doubt is in use here) it is very difficult to get such bots to work effectively.

I agree with the others on this one. What if a character speaks in a dialect? What if a character who's had little education writes a letter, and it's full of spelling errors? What if a canon language that doesn't exist in World One is used in the fic? What if dirty language actually serves a purpose to the plot? What kind of creativity-stunting is this?

A computer program, a brainless piece of coding, deciding what's good and what's bad, reporting on it over and over, and thus potentially dooming the works of writers who are already good or on the way there. I'm scared, I really am.

I read that article and I totally disapprove. Bahd wrighting can be a stylistic device and the other way round, not all badfic has bad grammar. Also, fics with a few grammatical errors can also be enjoyable if the rest fits. And everybody does typos. It just happens. Other than that, pretty much everything has been said in the articles.

PS: Stutid.

a few weeks ago. For the most part that became a discussion on whether proper SPaG is mandatory (a guideline or rule) or merely a curtesy (etiquette) on ffnet.

The PPC isn't really about being constructive either. Most of us write missions because we really would have liked it if we could have done bodily harm to badfic. But most of us also give concrit to the authors we "target" or at least to authors that look like they can still make something of their story. We don't do that under the guise of the PPC, we do that with our (other) only personas.

Red button, bad thing. There's a risk of false positives. Sometimes there's some bad grammar in the story for purposes of plot point. The problem that bothers me most is the risk of false positives and that there doesn't seem to be any manual check whether or not a story deserves to be flagged.

If it doesn't do concrit, it's a bad idea. Moreover, bots like that tend to make mistakes and generalizations (as already seen in censorship screening) so goodfic could be being reported as well.

Now, if the author him/herself used it to check his/her own stories for obvious problems? That would be awesome. But as it is? Very not.