Jul 2009 Archive, part c

One Piece the pirate manga featuring Luffy Rubber Man and Co? How extensive does this knowledge have to be? And what kinds of things are you expecting a beta be able to do?

Also, could you link the badfic?

Darklord is not a registered mini on our database. Therefore he's a newly created one. You are perfectly free to either send him our way or adopt him, just do let us know which so we can put him on our records.

Oooh. He looks fearsome. I like. Ahem, um any papers or qualities or collar perhaps even?

That said... hm, interesting. Simplest option would be to just charge her with lying and being all too full of herself, I guess. See, I think it depends on how you define a "soul" - I would say that we all are souls, and we have bodies; therefore, there's no way someone could talk to their soul without they themselves being an inert or robotic empty body. But people disagree, and as you said, in different Word Worlds.

If you want to play it safe, I'd say exorcise her and neuralyse all her memories so she ends up being basically a blank slate, and then either release her into a continumn where she can't do much harm or recruit her. On the other hand, if she makes you angry enough and you're willing to risk upsetting the Flowers, kill her, but exorcise her first just in case you accidentally damage the canon character.

If it's like that, I think that it's a replacement Sue, possibly. In that case, go ahead and kill her.
You should start a market for Unicorn Chasers. PPC agents will kill for those. Particularly the ones who work on the NSFW/NSFB ones.

That is to say, exorcise her out of him, and then kill her. Painfully. With fire.

Sorry for the late reply. Take any ship.

It was probably a bad idea to neglect the Board for so long. Anyway, have a shapeshifting plushie.

BTW, will your Agents be based in a TARDIS or a Response Center?

Have a winged kitten, and watch out for giant glass jars.

Welcome to the PPC. Please deposit your sanity in the provided receptacle. *indicates bucket marked "Warg Fodder"* You shan't have much need of it here. Also, have a shiny thing with a deadly curse on it which is shiny. Enjoy.
-Mad Maudlin

Don't worry about the unimaginative penname, mine isn;t very creative either.

Welcome to the PPC. Have a bag of pebbles and a Random Shiny Object.

I'm guessing you don't need the bucketful of links to find the wiki, Permission article and Original Series, so I'll spare you all that and offer you a handy tool for cleaning up the blood that will come from your missions when you inevitably join the Department of Mary Sues. *hint, hint, hint...*

That said, welcome. :)

Welcome to the PPC! Don't worry. Your name is perfectly fine here. Here's a set of fine steel daggers from the Raven Armory. (Courtesy of a few dead Sues.)

Welcome to the board. x3

I like your name, it's interesting. xD I try to keep to one main username for my internet uses, but it hasn't worked too well. >w

Hello there! Here, have a Pidgin! They are Very Friendly, and love to talk to you. You might have a little trouble understanding them at first, but...

Be advised, Pidgins are now an endangered species now that the Fic they originated in has been deleted, so if you wind up with a female one, you may be required to let it breed... *hands you a Pidgin, regardless of your protests*


Pidgin by ~DawnBluewings on deviantART

Very nice to meet you, (name here). Newbies are fun to tortu-- I mean uh... uh... uh... LOOK! A distraction!

Yo! Wow, you did the right way of things, kudos. Veeery nice. What fandom would you patrol for then?

Hmm? Your grammar seems impeccable, so far so good. Heh heh, here I speak like an old member, I'm new myself. Nice to meetcha.

One. Internet. Penname..? Wow such restraint! I applaud you good sir/ma'am/what have you! Amazing. O____o

Oh hey, around here we give out free stuffs so here ya go! Lychee, aka most heavenly fruit on earth.

Hope to see you around!!

Ahem. This is a bit of a crude one, but "Me cae los huevos" (My... erm... eggs drop. The meaning of this should be obvious.) [when I see him/her] means you dislike them.

It's a simile rather than a metaphor, but you were after weather ones, so: I just described someone as having a face like a wet weekend.

My older brother and I are fond of the term "Flip a cog", meaning to throw a fit or become very angry. I have no idea how common the expression is, but there's my input...

If you have any more ideas, they're more than welcome - I just want to thank you guys for what you've sent so far. :)

Anger: fuming, blind rage, towering rage

Fear: petrified, frozen

Worry: a gnawing or nagging worry

Happiness: feeling chirpy

Will add more if I think of them :)

"Her voice was heavy with sarcasm..."
How is it that when one is asked to think of things one thinks of all the time, one cannot think of them? Argh! *headbonk*

compassion, friendliness, and similar: warm

Lack of emotion: cold

anger: seeing red. Note also that heat associations with anger tend to refer specifically to fire in most cases.

Unfortunately, my knowledge of Latin does not extend to metaphors, so I can't help with non-english metaphors.

but here's a couple.

Green with envy, tickled pink, red with fury/whatever.

Look, Sedri, there's a ton of these buggers, and I have to go out in an hour. If I miss the start of the Potter travesty because I'm too caught up in thinking of metaphors for you, I may never forgive you. :P

Have asked my dad if he can think of any German examples that fit, since one of my principal memories of asking him for help with German homework was his insistence that idiomatic expressions don't tend to translate the same. Will let you know what he says.

Also, will reply on your lj as will have time to think that way.

This is for my semantics course at university, and I'll be writing it as a formal report, so if you know a metaphor in a non-English language, please, give me both the original words and the English translation.

Also, phrases relating to temperature or colour are excellent, but literally anything is welcome - the more variety, the better. Also, they don't need to be strict-definition metaphors, as "feeling down" is perfectly useful for this project.

Thanks to anyone who can help!

Great job in taking care of the Sues/Stus. That story was plain awful. Yay! You threw them in Mt. Doom! Here's some bleepka to make you feel better about taking that badfic.

Seriously, that's twice now I've seen misquotes of it. That's a pretty impressive number, considering that it's in the front of every book in the most likely edition a fan writer would have access to, two other editions, and I highly suspect every edition ever. Furthermore, it appears in the fellowship of the ring.

Lastly, it's in poetry, the original purpose of which was to be easy to remember.

This may be a personal thing, but the forgetting of a space ticks me off because I pronounce dark lord and darklord a bit differently, and one doesn't seem to fit the pattern.

I especially liked the little reference to His Dark Materials :)

Seriously, though, I found the original, and I'm surprised you came through with your eyes and brain intact. It's no wonder your Agents were a little... annoyed toward the end. Nice job~

Done well, a Tortall/Tolkien crossover might be awesome. I've just being rereading the Song of the Lioness series (and I've discovered that Alanna may be a Sue: violet eyes, awesome skillz and everything. Discuss).

However, I suspect this one isn't done well?

Just popping in to mention some Twilight/Pokemon crossover on the Pit. Exactly the same situation - copied Twilight with Pokemon character names.

I had them all once, when I was about twelve. Read them once and then never again, and I only remember pieces. Still, I remember enough.

What a colourless, forced combination of stories. All it's doing is repeating the existing things word-for-word. It's practically plagerism.

...Reading further, it IS plagerism. I may not have touched that book in ten years but I recognise the narrative. THEIF. Lazy, pathetic theif.

I don't remember enough details about TWtWB to PPC it - I never liked it at all, really - but I wait impatiently for someone who does. Such blatant piracy offends me.

It's great. I haven't been able to find the sequel anywhere, though.

and all I could think was "WTF is going on?"

I didn't see much female supremacy (my eyes skipped over every second letter), but if there is some, that calls for massacre in most circumstances for such stupidity and bad fanfiction is definitely one that deserves murder for that brand of dumb. The only time I allow nonsense like that on my interwebs is in a theoretical work (which actual research behind it rather than actual bullshit).

There is no way that I'll take this one. I couldn't even get past the first ten paragraphs. Someone else can have it, if they have a stronger stomach. I'll donate them some bleepka, though.

Please let me have it. PLEASE. I need this. Honestly.

...make it original football rather than modern. In other words, weapons are allowed.

Rugby's the game men of a future where there is only tournaments would play.

You take things that blow my brain to smithereenereenereens and make them lulzy (pardon my lolspeak.) I shall worship thee.

This was really nice to read after looking at possible future missions. I laughed. A lot.

And... I really, really, really, apologize for bringing the next topic up, (especially if it causes horrible flashbacks), but the news is Good News. Hopefully.
I was looking for a certain reviewer of L x C by way of LBTwriter's profile earlier today and... L x C and the other story that ghastly author wrote are gone. Deleted, apparently. It probably wasn't the writer herself, based on how protective she was of her writing, so I'm guessing the admin of ff.net finally got their rears in gear and got rid of it themselves. Unfortunately, LBTwriter wasn't banned. But at least this way you can see proof, if you wish.
*puts on super sterilized gloves and hazardous chemical-proof suit to get link*

http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1264633/LBTwriter

I don't know if this was helpful, and I really hate to bring it up, but since you seemed to be the one PPCing it, I thought you might want to know.

e-mail me at thejadefalcon@hotmail.co.uk. Thanks.

Could a regeneration alcove be adapted for use as a stasis chamber for normal beings? I don't know where I got this crazy idea, but it would be very convenient if it works. If not, I'll think of something else.

~Neshomeh

was that the Borg grow babies in an incubation chamber (First appirences in TNG). Which is refuted in later episodes. I think in Voyager they say that the Borg do not have children. If they assimilate children, they are put into a maturation chamber to accellerate growth to adulthood (the Borg children).

I myself think that it would be impossible for the Borg to have children because the flesh of the borg is esentially dead, not the grey palor.

That is my reasonings. There is alot of conflict within canon itself that it could go either way.

Leto

...I think not. If there are in-built safeguards to prevent drones from getting too emotional, I imagine there would be safeguards against biological "infestations". And there is, you know, the armour that keeps anything biological from going in or out.

If possible, it would be a way to increase their numbers, but they just don't seem to need that, since infants don't provide much new data to assimilate.

That said... there is nothing in canon to say definitely not, but I think it unlikely.

There are several non PPC-OFU-Livejournal affiliated websites and organizations that tackle badfic. I don't know most of their names, but I have heard of Project A.F.T.E.R. (im currently following the link, thanks!).

Your agents are unusual, but unusual = normal in the PPC. I think they're funny. I feel bad for the newbie, though.

Rose and Ross give me the giggles. I really look forwards to seeing more of them in the future.

*coughs* Ahem. >;3

It is granted. {= )

To add to Pads' advice about punctuation, I advise you to choose your adjectives a little more carefully. Take the following:

1) a veritable mass of brown curls

2) a massive cat lover

"Veritable" is one of those words, like "literally," that have been wrongly co-opted as expressions of emphasis. If you want to say that Meip has big hair, "mass" by itself serves the purpose. If you need to emphasize the mass, choose a word that truly describes it, like "springy" or something.

As for the second phrase, the word "massive" there makes it sound either like Meip is very overweight or like she loves massive cats. (Clearing up that ambiguity is how a hyphen would come in handy.) I suspect you're embellishing on the cliche "big cat-lover." The trouble is that that phrase, though in common usage, isn't correct. The cliche slides under the radar because it is everywhere. When you change it, though, you draw attention to it and the incorrectness of the phrase jumps out. You could say that Meip is a devout cat-lover, an obsessive cat-lover, an unrepentant cat-lover.... There are many possibilities in which the description is correct.

I hope that all makes sense. Let me know if I can clarify anything for you. Meanwhile, welcome to the PPC. {= )

~Neshomeh

If/when you get permission, when you write a mission, I'd be very happy to go over it before you post it, and shout at you about the case differences of who and whom. I'm even up for another bout of the Great Hyphen Debacle '09, if you like.

*removes betaing hat and goes to bed*

…what would a Borat mini be? I've never seen it, but the movie's logo spawns a mini (Bordt).

I'll take Davey Jones.

http://ppc.wikia.com/wiki/Misspelled_Monkey

http://uncommon-comma.livejournal.com/7647.html#cutid1

Lord Culter Beckett and Davey Jones are in good company with Jack Sorrow, Barbarossa, Will Tuner, Elizabther, Governor San, Gazelle, and my personal favorite, Commoner Norrington.

I think Xena is in need of a name for its minis, though. I've been dying to know what to do with Ares, God of Wart.

~Araeph

Misspelled Monkeys, I think.

If I had the links, I'd add a few more to this list.

Oh sweet Mew.
. . .
Just... why. (Y U DO THIS, INTERNETS?!?11one!?)
I don't think I'm going to be able to un-read those. Curse my curiosity anyway.

But the thing about Legendary Badfics is that they need to be fairly 'legendary'. Everyone knows C*l*br**n, which is why we can moan about bad memories and drink straight bleeprin together. I'm not saying these fics aren't terrible, but going out to look for canidates doesn't seem to be... in the spirit of it all.

Also, that Sailor Moon story is on a page with the heading "This'll get me banned."
Doesn't that qualify it as... not crackfic, but the other term...? Can't remember. But it's a deliberate attempt to be horrible, and I'm not sure if the existing Legendary Badfics were the same.

...I'm being quite a downer here, aren't I? Apologies. Just my two cents.

*Vomits* WHAT did they do to Chibi-Usa???? Not that I've seen that show for awhile, but still... oh gawd...Not Ami, she was my favorite... And Usagi and Mamoru??!! Chibi-Usa is her DAUGHTER!!...And, if Saturn is her best friend, than WHAT THE EFFING HECK IS SHE DOING RAPING HER???!!

This fic probably has died a few times, but it needs to die. Again.

Oh, hi. I'm Fiofie. XD

OH GOD! OH GOD! IT'S STILL UP?!

*crawls into a dark corner and curls up*

Toph was castrated... Toph was castrated... Toph was castrated... nooooo... They castrated Toph!

I saw that stupid comic on DA, and then the author got band, but's IT'S STILL UP. *sobs*

I'd heard of Chocobo Nights. The others are new to me (fortunately, I guess). However, they're all kinds of creepy.

The year you leave your home continuum doesn't necessarily correspond with the year you arrive in HQ. For example, Nume left the Real World in the late seventies and arrived in HQ approximately two decades later without living the intervening years. Something similar could have happened to Makes-Things, since he appeared shortly before the Cascade happened in the mid-eighties.

~Neshomeh

As Laburnum says, it's a passage of time thing. People do celebrate birthdays, but they never really seem to get that much older ... You're as old as you think you are, I suspect, which means that the scatterbrained or distracted people are much more likely to hang on to youth perpetual :)

If he ignored it sufficiently, and he strikes me as the type to not notice the passage of time under normal circumstances, he may not have aged at a normal rate.

I don't recall specifically who or where, but there's a scene in The Phantom Tollbooth - separate from the half-baked ideas banquet, I'm pretty sure - involving edible punctuation. I seem to remember sugar-coated apostrophes being involved.

I haven't seen it in any missions other than my own Bad Slash mission (check out the wiki pages of Dana Trent and/or Tarian Toran for details).

But someone else may have used it before and I just don't know about it.

Did we never make a wiki page for it?

What do commas taste like? Because I've been proofreading something and if the commas were eaten, it would explain a lot.

Call him Ziekk Eek.

If we're doing surnames, how about Schlepneck? You can't go wrong with Schlepneck.

What a bizarre request.

I'll throw in my two pence. ... or I would if I could think of the one I just thought of and then forgot.

Let's chuck out random words in the hopes that I'll remember it: Sushi, Nausea, Penguin, Hippopotamus (*going on animals now*), Aardvark, Scarab, Liplurodon (an awful approxamation of a sea-dwelling dino that I can't spell right now).

While I can't remember what the name I wanted was, I vote for Aardvark now. Mainly because Mass Effect has weird alien creatures on one planet that I've named Aardvark-bat-monkeys because of what they look like. It also has Aardvark-horse-dinosaurs on another world.

On a somewhat related subject, if you have a friend called Faye who is a Star Trek fan, Private Eye's Psuedo-Names section gave her a wonderful name if she ever wants to changes. Faye Zersonn-Stunn.

Thought up a bunch in the last hour. Poofpoof, Bobbers, Whizbang, Rowdydow, Flimflam, Wingding, Sockdolager, Voodeedoo, or Caterpillar.

Or some sort of food like... oh, I don't know... Noodles.

Latrine. Common, just say it, it is hilarious!

Leto

Or one of the others from MSTing of Space Mutiny?

But Hitsugaya and Kenpachi are my favourite captains, so I'm easily swayed by the change to fangirl. And while Kenpachi wasn't actually in that episode, if he doesn't become important in this plot line the writers need to be slapped and asked what the hell they were thinking.

Thanks for bringing that up though. I don't watch Bleach any more because I got bored of it being so repetitive (perhaps if it wasn't a series where no one ever dies it might be more exciting; I read it instead so it takes up less time and leaves me more time to watch more interesting shows), but I'll watch these fillers.

I don't think I've read that many more recent missions, so I don't know what the current trends are, but this one did fit the style of TOS quite closely. I enjoye dit.

"...Am not. Who do you think I am, Jay Thorntree?" Win. Win with a side of awesome and lots of epic on top.

I have to agree with Pads here. Not all ladies, or 'laidies' like romance, and that genre is not exclusive to women either.

Plus, unless it is animated it can't be 'animesque', since anime is short for 'animation'. Sorry, but I am nitpicky about this kind of thing.

For the ladies there's romance?

When you've got over me kicking you in the balls for that, would you like to think bloody hard before you phrase a similar sentiment here again?

I'll have to re-read the whole thing later. Also, you can't blame the SO too much for not knowing about vampires - there are so many different kinds floating around.

I'm looking forward to the last of it.

"Er... do any of you have a Remote Activator on you?"

I think that was my favorite line. It cut the drama in a very good way. *g*

I caught a couple of things:

1. Captain Dandy rustled his feathers.
-- Really?

2. She [Tango] squeezes his hand and turned away.
-- I assume that's meant to be "squeezed."

Also, I just noticed that the text turns red on mouse-over. Is there a reason for that?

I look forward to the conclusion of the story. And then I'll really have to go back and read everything straight through, because it will be excellent. {= )

~Neshomeh

Fantastic. Fan-kriffing-tastic.

*is gleeful and squee-y and very very impressed*

And I cannae say any more for fear I give out spoilers.

More "Crashing Down"! And it's as awesome as always. I squeed a bit at both of the revelations.

I don't mean to bother you, but I'm just curious about something. Is the mention of the Waterlily Commander a mistake, or was the DMF&F actually larger than Floaters at that time? Also, I apologise for the delay in the things I'm writing up, but it's been a matter of getting to them (and, in the case of the email, organising everything in a neat manner). Nicely written, I was just wondering about the Waterlily Commander thing.

My memories of my narmful PPC: Time of Judgement fic are fading away already...Thank you.

I went to see it with my sister, and while we both thought it wasn't a ''bad'' film, it really wasn't that great either. I know it's impossible to stuff everything in a book that long into a two-hour film, but they could've at least ''tried''.

they did try to follow the book more closely this time, even though they did cut out a lot of the later stuff. That, and they destroyed the Burrow for no apparent reason. Good up to halfway, meh after that.

I actually really liked it. They managed to concentrate the content of the book into it very well. Also they made the upcoming romance with Ginny a bit more noticeable - you know, more than Harry's offhand thoughts. I just thought it was odd at the end of the book when he wound up with her after thinking about how pretty she was all of three times and having the same thoughts about other girls.

I did want the inferi to be more typical zombie-like with rotting bodies instead of the more dessicated look, but it's marketed as a family/kid movie, so meh.
I think this was actually one of my favorite HP movies. I really like how Bellatrix got more screentime. And omg, Luna!!! I think she's my new fave character.

I don't tend to get worked up about changes, unless they're hugely major (see: The Seeker; see also: most of Disney, though I try to be fairly quiet about that), although I second the wondering about how he'll find the rest.

I have never spent so much of a movie facepalming or muttering trope names, though. Honestly, the heavy-handed romance was a bit excessive, no?

Luna was wonderful, as usual, Slughorn was at least passable, and Alan Rickman was astounding. 'course, I have a vague idea that he's got more acting experience than any half of the rest of the cast put together.

I was unhealthily amused at Harry's line that "I know what I'm doing. Or at least, Felix does." Yes, I know it was straight from the book, but I first read the book well before a Felix moved into my head (at the Livejournal roleplay Milliways_bar).

My friend and I made a pact: if he ever acts that stupid with his girlfriend, I will slap him. And if I ever act that stupid with my (currently hypothetical) boyfriend, he will point and laugh.

...and I blame Bad Slash for the fact that for the entire movie, I was shipping Harry/Slughorn. Because some of Dumbledore's lines really sounded like he was sending Harry to seduce Slughorn.

And word on the Gollum thing.

It amused me, actually.

I only read the book once, and that was when it came out, so I can't really remember it. I spent most of it thinking with all the slash potential in it, why hasn't the Internet exploded yet? And the rest of it wanting to mother Malfoy, who is very clearly the best actor out of the kids. Some of his scenes actually seemed /too/ emotional, because he was along side Potter who was boring as hell.

There were some shots that were absolutely stunning though, so a thumbs up to the cinematographer, and to the composer, because the music was better too. But I think they were just trying to get it out of the way so they could get onto Deathly Hallows.

I wondered when this thread would happen.

The movie got mixed reviews from me and my fiance. I like it very much from an artistic standpoint. The balance between plot and fluff was quite good, I thought, and they did some wonderful things with the camera.

However, as usual, they did some fairly unforgivable things to the story. I don't remember personally, since it's been a long time since I read the book, but my man assures me that the attack on the Burrow did not happen and was a waste of film time that could have been used for other things, like showing more of the collection of Voldemort memories. Also, the rule about no Apparating in or out of Hogwarts applies equally to everyone, including Dumbledore. He was very disappointed that they didn't include the remnants of Dumbledore's Army and the Battle of the Astronomy Tower. Also the lack of the Order of the Phoenix doing anything at all. I was personally annoyed that they didn't give Snape his line at the end. "Don't call me coward!" Very important character moment.

On the other hand, I thought the scene at the underground lake was very well done. I cried the first time, especially when Dumbledore got up and torched all the Inferi. It was so awesome and so awful, knowing he was going to die soon. {= (

~Neshomeh

They changed some bitz. I WANT THE BAT BOGEY HEX!

(Not on me personally, of course...)

nice to see you.

Take your pick.

Good to meet you, Barid! Have an incredibly racist chainsaw!

Any friend to an Oldbie is a friend to us all! *offers bowl* Take a complimentary walnut! Please ignore it if it starts talking to you... that happens sometimes.

I gift you with vintage bleepka and a spare CAD. If it starts spouting Tom Lehrer songs, that means a canon character is OOC beyond repair.

BTW, will your Agents be based in a TARDIS or a Response Center?

Fantastic to have you here. Welcome to the PPC!

If Neshi got to you first, I'm sure I don't need to give you any of the helpful information, so instead I bestow upon you a bag of pebbles, (good for throwing at Sue and people who annoy you) and a Random Shiny Object! Gaze upon its shininess in awe! Awe, I say!

Happy to have you!

(YesImaybealittlehyperrightnowI'vehadtoomuchcaffeinetodaysorrykthanxbai.)

Have a teasaber. It's a mutant hybrid of a teacup and a lightsaber. ...Don't ask.

Welcome to the Board. Please deposit your sanity in the provided receptacle. *indicates bucket marked "Warg Fodder"* You shan't be needing it here. Also, have one aerosol canister of Snark-in-a-bottle(TM). Enjoy.

Here's a wrackblade. Use it well.

Welcome to the PPC! Here's some bleepto-dismol (for badfic-induced headaches) and a helm from the Raven Armory.

Have some Anti-Lustin Kunai!

You obviously don't need the guided tour or the usual warnings, so I'll just give you a Capillary Towel and snitch a drink. Thanks! :)

*poke*

It's traditional. *g*

~Neshomeh