Nov 2008 Archive, part a

No.

I know the fandoms fairly well, but am still working on the permission thing, so maybe after that I'll pick one. Moved them into Unclaimed Badfic?

I've seen some canons where stuff like Jack and the Sue happen. Ever seen Moonlight? A vampire rescues a little girl when she's about four years old, watches her for most of her life, then the two fall in love when she's in her twenties. And we frequently have flashbacks to when she's a little girl. It always squicked me a tiny bit.

Very nice missions, as always.

http://www.rmxp.org/forums/viewtopic.php?t=59790.0

And if it's the one I'm thinking of (Harry Potter Turns To The Lord), then it was removed from ff.net. Whether or not it can be found anywhere else, I have no idea.

…Using the sprite depiction. I don't exactly get along with Amano's art real well.

I was Lady (of the Masque).

I wasn't here for the RP, but which are you talking about? One of the invasions? Sorry if it seems like a dumb question, I just got curious.

But I was Gaspode the Wonder Dog :P

...and temporarily avoiding saving the world and delivering pizzas for the mob.

(From Snow Crash, which is a rather good book)

Messire the Marquis de Carabas at your service~

I was Felix. This is mainly because he's my strongest headvoice, having emerged nearly three years ago at Milliways Bar on livejournal.

Also, the part with hitting the drink on the mask was totally unplanned. I just figured that if it's a costume party he'd show up in his mask, and then when I had him take a drink I remembered the mask has no mouth hole. Thus...

I was a little preoccupied at the time. Ah well, next time perhaps.

Sheryl Nome.

Who the heck was I trying to flirt with those two times?

No one.

Spazzed out a few hours before I posted the introduction post and went through a massive funk the entire three days and never posted afterwards. T_T

Sorry.

*fails*

That was insanely fun. I was Chani.

*Silently points to the Planet Killer in the skies above*

However, the agent billing really doesn't sit well with me, as others have brought up, because of the co-operative nature of the film. Other than that, though, excellence.

I'll have to agree with the others as regards "Starring" etc, but the poster in and of itself is wonderfully done.

Hey, Lily, that's a really nice poster, but having headliners is a bit... odd.

Especially since because of how that RP worked, there were no main characters really, making there be little sense in having 'Starring' right there at the top with just three Agents. It downplays on the participation of a lot of other Agents, as well.

Not to mention the credits below don't really mention a fraction of the people involved.

I do like the artwork, though. :)

That is literally made of awesome.
In my opinion, anyway. :)

Love this poster, Lily, it looks awesome and just makes the idea of the movie more exciting. I've been trying to get all my lines in as quickly as possible (doing three characters at once makes that a little easier said than done), and I hope the rest of the cast does too so we can get even closer to finishing this. I can tell the whole thing is gonna be amazing when it's done. Is "There Will Be Glitter" supposed to be a parody of "There Will Be Blood"? That's what I thought of when I saw the title. Yeah though, awesome work.

And that's saying something, as I'm rather critical of art work. But the sketchy picture combined with the bold text makes a really nice effect. I would have done it differently, probably used colour but kept the sketchy element and my drawing style is a little different to that, but I still like. So much going on in one picture, it attracts your attention. Was it you who drew it?

As I recall, Permission Requests are supposed to include a short biography for each character. As in, a paragraph or two, not their entire history. Any PG evaluating you will need quite a bit of time available just to read all this once.

Also, though I could be wrong here, I believe the rules about 'one month' was made with less concern about how long any person has been here and more emphasis on being a regular and active community member.

Don't take this the wrong way - I'm not an expert nor in any position of authority, but if I were a PG, I would really, really, prefer having a lot less to read, so for their sake, might I suggest that you summarise?

There seems to have been a problem with the length of the bio. I apparently made it too long, so I have to type up the rest. So yeah, two parter, and I'll make a mental note to not make Zodfang's so bloody big.

"yway, marking a point in the story where it would improve, but Marcus interfering early to kill the Stu before it could escape (as it did look like it was about to escape) not only prevented that but created a parodox. The Words were shown, describing a "figure in black" levelling a pistol at the Stu's head.

That bit there, the alleged "accidentally being written in" (despite Marcus' claims that it was impossible), damned Marcus' whole case. Killing without charges was excused by them being in the middle of combat, but a potential security leak? Causing a parodox in the fic? It didn't matter if it was true, if it was Upstairs' fault for giving him a mission to a fic that was in progress, none of that mattered. At the end of the day, Marcus still insisting the hearing had been biased against him, he was found guilty on all counts and his license as an Agent was temporarily suspended. At least three years they said, most likely. There were concerns about if he would be able to adjust to civilian life, so he was allowed to continue to live in the New Caledonia city (especially since they figured they might need to contact him), but he wasn't allowed in headquarters and wasn't considered an Agent until the suspension was lifted. Through all that, Marcus continued to appeal it.

After a few months, Marcus all but gave up. However, events such as the Macrovirus plague and the Sue invasion came by, devastating the PPC. A few months after that, his case was finally put back under review by whoever (hell if he knew). Almost a year after the hearing and suspension, the verdict was overturned and he received new orders: report back to the Marquis de Sod for reassignment.

Needless to say, Marcus' first thought was "what the hell took those Flowers so long?". His second was "I hope I haven't gotten rusty."

Personality: While not the emotionally dead shell you might expect a 16 year vet of something like the PPC to be, Marcus definitely gives off the impression of being tired, in the literal sense of suffering from fatigue, oftentimes people conversing with him feel as if he'd rather be asleep than talking to them. This is through no fault of his own, or of the other party, however, more due to the relaxed, almost lazy way he typically carries himself. The fact that he often IS quite tired doesn't help things, but he's still more laid back than people expect, which does give the impression of aloofness.

He is more alert than he looks, though, right down to the seemingly calm gait he walks with, every step calculated as if half of him were checking for traps and the other half was ready to explode into action and rip the throat out of the nearest living creature in an instant. Like anyone who lasts more than a couple of missions in the PPC, he is a remorseless killer when you get down to it, and a highly dangerous one at that, if more controlled and only really willing to kill when he has to (his justification for mercilessly killing Sues is a third "they're a threat to the multiverse" a third "If I don't kill them, they'll kill me" and a third "it's my job"). He is much slower to anger than when he was younger, not as rash or impulsive. Hardly cold and unflappable, it just takes a lot more to actually get him pissed off nowadays, and except for a couple of instances his fury tends to be more cold than hot. When provoked, he usually assaults the person responsible with no warning.

He has always been sarcastic and snarky, but it seems age has only increased this trait in him, along with increasing the sheer venom in his words. He has no tolerance for stupidity, and will make that known at the slightest provocation. When it is not used to lay people low, however, his "smartass" sense of humour is still quite potent, and can be amusing in the right situation. More often than not though, he just comes across as an asshole and makes people angry. Not for a lack of trying though, when he can be arsed he definitely puts on a strong effort to come off as a decent and likeable person, and has actually made some friends in the organization, but it's always easier said than done for him, especially since he constantly has to convince himself that there's even a point in trying. Where that many years in the PPC make many others too paranoid to ever be in contact with anyone else, it took him a while to get past that himself, and figure out that his best chance of actually making it was to stick with people.

It isn't just pragmatism that drives Marcus to occasionally try to reach out to people, though. Every time he gets close to someone and they die, or get reassigned, or go crazy, or just retire, it hurts him greatly, but he always tries again, mostly due to the desire to form a sort of "normal" life in the organization, especially since at this point he is sure most of his friends and family in the "outside world" believe he is dead. That fact, and the inevitability of their having moved on, used to depress him, but by now he's largely gotten over it and been able to find a place in life where he is content, if not always happy. The sense of being a part of something greater, of actually being valuable to the protection of what is basically all of existence, is both overwhelming and extremely satisfying to him, and he still sometimes falls back on reminding himself that people *need* the PPC when he isn't sure he can keep going without that kind of boost.

As said before, Marcus is also something of a playboy and flirt, when the mood takes him he can pretty reliably be seen hitting on whatever girl catches his eye, though not absurdly and not to the point of harassment. If he can get in their pants, great, if not, he backs off, as just the act itself helps him establish that connection with another human he is typically after when on such endeavours, and he usually feels better than he did before. Some have suggested that this means he's more flirty/perverted when he's depressed, but he denies this. Overall, Marcus is someone who likes to put on a strong face for everyone else, though he isn't afraid to let it down every once in a while. He has actually started to wonder if he is starting to get too old for the job, on the grounds that the pressure can be so overwhelming at times.

All that having been said though, he is still sometimes capable of the same hot-blooded insanity as other PPC agents, it just shows up less frequently."

Usually a 15 would be a PG-13 and an 18 would be R. At least, that's my experience.

Sending them in right now.

Since you said to say so in order to make myself available ("That said, anyone who can volunteer for a few more voices, or anyone who wasn;t around at the time and would like to, say something and we'll send out the lines to you pronto."), I can still do a few more voices if you want or need me to, considering I've mostly finished my current batch of lines anyway. So yeah, that's me volunteering again.

I still have Redd's lines to do, but in my case it's more a time/schedule issue and I'm still trying to get them in. I think you have my lines for Sparky and Denny, unless Trojie hasn't given them to you yet. Sorry for the wait.

... that you've given up on me. I barely have enough time to lurk, let alone contribute. Much apologies for volunteering and then disappearing.

On a different note, you all are doing a marvelous job!

... I cannot make my voice sound any different than it usually does (unless you desperately want a character with a really fake-sounding Deep South accent), and two characters with identical voices would sound silly. Sorry.

...I actually haven't recorded one of the people that just got sent to me. That's because I haven't had a working mic for a while. But I stole my brother's and so should have the lines in sometime this week. I'm so sorry. DX

Better pick a 'character' substantially different from Sedri and Marsha, though, and tell me what sort of voice/accent you want (within reason).

Also, I believe BattleHamster is at some sort of long-term school or training or something (can't quite recall), and has little or no access to the internet. Not sure, though.

Sounds like a case of the original post being deleted and the other posts being split. It happens sometimes on boards I've been to, but usually Proboards sites where the whole thread isn't deleted, just specific posts.

I have my doubts that Obama will live up to what he intends to do. But if he succeeds, more power to him, and I'll happily vote for him in four years. I wish him the best of luck.

There were a few riots at my school due to people being overly happy about Obama winning.

Few people got arrested.

I don't mind either way who won as long as they do their job well. S'all that really matters to me.

At least I can sleep now that the cops arrested the people disturbing the peace.

The next American President is SENATOR BARACK OBAMA! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!

Who, me, partisan? What are you talking about? :P

Hawaii, California, Washington and Oregon for Obama, Idaho, Utah and Alaska for McCain.

Here we go, ladies and gentlemen!

The Beeb has it 200-130 for Obama, including the recent calls of Obama for New Mexico and McCain for Mississippi and Texas (ain't that your state, July? ;) ).

CNN has 199-78 to 'Bama, so they seem to be a little behind.

Fox is pointing out that Obama's only 0.72% ahead in the popular vote - Obama is at 49.89%, and McCain's at 49.17%. Still, they're calling the same states as everyone else.

Ohio. As in, the KEY battleground state of this election.

*breaks out the zippo lighter*

Did it a few days ago, actually. Yay absentee ballots. As for how I voted, I'll just say that Sarah Palin scares me. O.o;

~Neshomeh, who thinks the world is better off without insisting on the births of children who are unwanted and will probably be unloved, uncared-for, and unhealthy.

Thanks to CNN for the projections.

The BBC is calling 103 Electoral College votes for Obama (including the states of Pennsylvania, Delaware, Maryland, Vermont, Illinois, New Jersey, Connecticut, New Hampshire, Maine and Massachusetts), while McCain has 49 (including Kentucky, Oklahoma, Arkansas, Tennessee, Alabama and South Carolina).

Fox is calling it for McCain (48.31%), with Obama at 45.96% and Thomas Stevens (?) at 4.67%.

CNN has called Pennsylvania for Obama.

Should be interesting.

In less than four days, boy :P You better vote in that one. For whoever you like, because that's your own business, but you better vote!

Just got back from doing that, actually. *crazy grin*

Most the rest I voted for down my ballot were Democrats, with some Libertarians.

Moderates FTW!

Electoral College votes, that is. 15 more polls are closing in the next few minutes, so it's looking promising for Obamaphiles.

Figures courtesy of CNN.

I won't be legally able to vote until January. >.
Personally, I've got no idea where I stand with the candidates. Whichever one screws up less is fine with me. And hopefully there won't be TOO much insanity this time around. I don't want to wait for them to have a dozen recounts and arguments over what counts and what doesn't...

*goes back to watching CNN*

My campus is covered in chalk advertising, Obama posters, and people asking if you've voted yet. Really, it's been getting rather annoying. I must have been asked that at least 7 times today, and been told to vote at least 20.

But yes, I have voted, and I have the sticker to prove it. And I'll find out who won tomorrow, because I won't forsake my homework to watch every minute.

~ BeetleFire, tired of being bombarded

I refuse to stay up all night to watch the elections, since I have college in the morning, so I'll check on it when I get up. Everything should be sorted by the time I wake up tomorrow.

Though our history teacher is really enthusiastic about American history and we did a mini-vote.

I'm such a fence-sitter with Obama and McCain that I did "eeny-meeny-miny-mo" with the two. >.
And as for the propositions...NO on 8!

CNN has projected Obama to win Vermont and McCain to win Kentucky - no surprises there. Georgia, Kentucky, New Hampshire and Maine have also closed their polls.

Fox is projecting similar - Obama/Vermont, Maine, North Hampshire, McCain/Kentucky, and Indiana is anyone's game (49% each). Fox is currently projecting McCain to win, but that's no surprise.

BBC's also calling the same - BamaMont and McTucky.

Filling out a little circle on a piece of paper has never been more satisfying...

Yay Obama/Biden*!

*Did anyone else's mind go to bad places because of how they write "Presidential Candidate/VP Candidate"?

Can't legally vote at the moment, but I'm following the election quite closely.

Thank God it's over.

(That is, for another three years.)
(and also disregarding the two months of controversy over who cheated worse on votes.)
(and all the recounts.)
(and the claims of racism from both sides.)

:D

There was once a time where Kenny died and stayed dead for most of a season. There was something about him possessing Cartman for a while. I think in the end he just comes back like normal, and they say he was just off-camera for most of the time/

And then he comes back, and he's not dead.

We should figure out how he does that...

Sounds like you could handle it as an Imposter!Stu, though I'm not really sure. Then it'd be a textbook case of getting rid of the Stu, finding the real canon character, and replacing the Stu with the canon. I'm guess guessing though, more or less.

hS

Well, you're not getting one. Ta-ta.

hS

PGs need time to answer requests. Mine took a while to get through, and I've seen some go down half the page before a PG has had a chance to respond. Seriously, you need to be patient.

The fact that you didn't have your agent bios done, said they would be finished later, and then you replied with "Forget it" is a pretty damn good reason. Besides, did it cross your mind that maybe the PGs missed it because they weren't on at the time, and when they saw it it had you saying "forget it" as the immediate next reply? That'd indicate you changed your mind.

Good points, all of them. I am in complete agreement. *nods*
*now wondering how far the line can be toed*

Also now looking forward to the influx of new missions.
I suppose this means I have to finish that first mission for Kat and Samuel that's sitting 85% finished on my hard drive... >.> Ah well. Motivation is good. And re-reading the OS is also good - just can't do it in class or I'll get funny looks. =P

But I just like to say:

This challange has a point. It is not just something to get alot of oneshots out there and get read, it is to get the spirit back into our regular stories.

I have been wanting to write a story for a while, now I have some insentive to! I have been hopping to get the PPC store running again smoothly (well as smooth as it ever gets) and have something new before the end of the month!

Leto

While Teh Awsum Drama is all very well, that's not what the PPC was made for.

As for your challenges... I just finished reading TOS, but I'm more than happy to do it again. I'm sure my neighbours don't mind hearing me giggling like a loon at weird hours of the night. And I think the missions I've done so far are pretty grass-roots... but if not, I'll put my effort into the one I'm going to finish before the month is up.

And I apologise if my creating the MTFFAT was a litle overboard, I just liked the idea of someone wandering around trying to get people to be nice to their technology and constantly having to leg it because of their (predictable) reactions.

So... *attempts to nudge the microphone she's been using to record for the Movie out of sight* I'll get on that. Though my production duties will continue- I'm the one who runs round poking everyone to do things, after all. Looks like we have something in common, hS.

*salutes* Sir, I accept your challenge with great pleasure! (And a bit of a groan, now that I have to actually find a Suefic to put into my mission, but I won't mention that.)

I can't promise I'll write anything, or even ask for Permission this year, but I'll try to find time to reread TOS. And I support with great delight those unconnected, old-style missions!

Duly noted, mon capitaine!

And I do rather agree with you, on #1 particularly; torture shouldn't be used in writing unless it's to prove a social/political point (although since that's not even the point of the PPC, this bit is irrelevant), or, as you mentioned, like Jay's sockpuppets.

And one no-strings-attached-yet-hopefully-entertaining mission coming right up. ;)

I probably fouled up at least a few of these points, though thanks for the message. I didn't mean to offend, if I have. And yeah, I know this isn't directed at me, but I do feel like I'm at least a little at fault (especially when I accidentally started that "attack the Factory" discussion), so I thought I'd say something. Never know if you've pissed someone off when you're only talking to them through a computer, heh. The only challenge of yours I can actually do at the moment is rereading the Original Series, but I'll go do that. Very well said post.

For a while I started to wonder whether there was something wrong with the missions I wrote because none of them are part of any major plot arcs (most of them can even be read in random order; that's how unconnected to a plot arc they are).

That said. I'd like to excuse myself from Challenge Two. At least until December. It's NaNo and I've just plugged two missions on the board less than a week ago.

*goes off to read TOS*

...that up next for me is an interlude introducing my newest recruit and then said recruit's first mission.

Really, the best thing about the PPC is the humor. Drama is all well and good, but the bizarre humor is what makes the PPC what it is.

...using a rather decently-written Suefic.
The Suefic I'm using
Now I feel like I'm cheating, but...she IS a Sue.

I have three and a half missions done, only one of which is posted - and my hit list has grown to epic proportions, and it's not going anywhere on its own. I'm not doing NaNo so that should give me time.

Only thing is that I have a bit of clean-up duty for our first mission to complete in this one - I don't suppose that'll count as anything 'big' or 'unusal', though.

Cheers, hS. I think we all needed this kick. Besides, any excuse to read the OS is a good thing. *grin*

Huinesoron, I'm really glad I'm not the only one who thought that. :)

*quietly sneaks out*

And you're right about rereading TOS, as well. Keep the focus, guys! Fun first!

I've got a few in progress at the moment, actually. I'll try and get the Department of Angst's second mission done for the end of the month.

-Trojie, trying to do everything for the fun parts

I'm doing NaNoWriMo at the same time as well.

And does this mean I'll need to do something about both Lori and Bill (DMSE&R) and Christianne and Eledhwen (DMS)?

Oh and does dissecting a 'Sue alive for scientific purposes count as torture? Along with every other experiment the DMSE&R might perform on Sues for the sake of science?

I'd have to say, even with the amazing writing of the massive events and all, and the cool later series, the Original Series really is still my favorite.

Definitely taking you up on Challenge 2, too! I've had permission for a few years now, and I've had 1/3 of a mission on the back-burner for at least a few months, so I'll get on that! Should provide a welcome distraction from NaNoWriMo.

It's that I haven't written a mission since John Freeman in, like, April. With NaNoWriMo and a play competition coming up, I probably won't have a mission up 'til the end of the month, but Harry the Wizard is looking to be purged of the Candy Mountain menace, so I shall get on to that soonish.

And I actually feel reassured. Everyone's been doing these huge, big plot-arc-y things, and I've felt bad about just having little ideas for regular missions instead of getting into something big like that. ^^; So, I've actually been thinking right, even if I've been incredibly lazy about getting things actually done.

That said, I will have that new DoGA mission turn up before too horrendously long, I promise.

~ Rath ~

Now I need to actually write my first mission, instead of just shouting my approval. *is a procrastinator*

Another thing about PPC canon: If it isn't in the Original Series, it's pretty much up to group consent. If everyone goes "Oooh, yeah, that's awesome!" then it can be canon. Otherwise, if I don't like something someone has done since the OS, I feel okay about ignoring it. I'd go so far as to say that's a right. So, just because you have Permission doesn't mean that what you do is automatically going to be accepted by everyone. If it is, congratulations, but it isn't really something you should be expecting. Again, it's all in fun. If you want to make all the rules, write an original story in a world of your own.

As for me, I've been trying to finish my current mission (which does contain angst, but it is mission-specific angst). It SHOULD happen sometime this year... And then I have a 2008 Invasion interlude to do, and then a FicPsych story, and before I die retire I really want to take on "Subjugation," but other small missions will probably happen before that's done.

~Neshomeh, who might get more prolific when she's out of college, but then again, she might also drop off the face of the internet for the lack of money to afford it. We shall see.

I'm so glad you're saying this. I'm slowly coming back from a really long hiatus caused by everyday Real Life things, and I'm looking around and thinking, "Wow...lotta stuff's happened." It's a little disorienting to come back and find out that there've been a couple hundred additions and changes to PPC canon, as I'm slowly finding out.

That said, I'm gonna go read the Original Series, and then find the time to finish up that mission I started ages ago. And that little interlude, too. And then maybe write another interlude chock-full of character interaction and development, should I find the time. Because while giant canon-expanding plotlines can be fun...I have to admit that my favorite stories are the ones that are character-driven.

*goes off to read*

... so do I have to drop that to do a mission? It's overdue as it is.

I kind of like the bog-standard missions more than the big complicated storylines (I don't think the TS set counts as a big complicated storyline so much as a bunch of missions stuck together) but I admit I'm guilty of #1 - I did mention that my agents got in trouble for the Drip Rat and Redneck Tree deaths but didn't detail their punishment because I couldn't make that funny. Could also apply to the Nighthunt fiasco, unless HQ makes exception for characters who attempted to violate and/or consume PPC members.

I shall try to write a mission, but it might be a bit difficult~

Also, as regards 1., what would be the disciplinary action taken against an Agent who did use torture?

And now I have to figure out which work in progress to work on.

. . . usually.

It was supposed to be a reply to Huinesoron's post. Farewell this time! I'm still going to watch from afar, though.

I just read the plot summary on Wikipedia, though, and it certainly sounds like a very urple fic.

Why did this book remind you of the PPC? I don't think I see the connection.

...asked my mom about it. Apparently it's also a made-for-TV-miniseries. And is very dramatic. *shrug*

At least, you know where the places are where the links to the canon are.

There's a list called Complete list of PPC Fiction and I believe something called "Everything PPC", though I don't seem to have that bookmarked.

Where you looking for specific recommendations?

Maybe this should be that "disconnected" mission for the DMSE&R...send that baby to us!

In Trojie and Pads' Mpreg mission/s (there's at least one unreleased), it's implied that the Medical dept. have tube kind of environments for babies that have no receptive uteri nearby.

Or something similar. Maybe that pod thing used in Kyle XY to house him during his development?

http://vorenthereaper.deviantart.com/art/PPC-Chronicles-1-Dragon-Splat-103459235

I think your questions have been answered, but I have one for you: have you been on the Board before? I ask because we prefer (by which I politely mean "insist") that people have Official Permission before they start writing PPC stories, and I don't recognize your username.

Either way, do you have the Spyro PPC posted? I'd like to see it. {= )

~Neshomeh, Official Permission-Giver

MSTs aren't quite the same thing as PPC works. A couple of times I think Agents've been made to MST things as punishment, but there isn't a particular department that does them, and that form of punishment hasn't appeared often.

As to five, well, it'd depend on what you were using them for, I guess.

1. Not at all! The PPC deals with pretty much any canon there's badfic for and agents willing (for a given value of 'willing') to go deal with it. *grin*
   
   2. A mindflayer is, I believe, one of these: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Illithid
   
   3. There's a list on the wiki: http://ppc.wikia.com/wiki/List_of_Departments
   
   4. See above. There doesn't seem to be one, but I could be wrong about that
   
   5. Er...depends on the continuum, I would guess,
   Dragon hide seems to be a popular choice for armour, though I'm not sure if that's because it's particularly good for that, or because the wearer just went 'Oooh! Shiney!' at it (and obviously left some NPC/bit character shopkeeper snickering behind their hand that they'd managed to offload a bunch of useless merchandise at an exorbitant price).
   Dragon blood I've seen as having healing properties, nbeing used in potions, conferring strength upon those who drink it, and a host of other things besides.
   Fairy wings? Hmmm... Okay, you've stumped me there. I'll get back to you on that one.
   
   ~Fynn
   *who is rambling far too much at the moment*

If I am meta, I will not attempt to use my lack of a fourth wall to cause harm to others. If I accidentally break my fourth wall, I will live with it or neuralyze* myself, without attempting to use this to break other people's brains.


*Er... Is that how it's spelled?

1. I will not recruit Wile E. Coyote.
   - His methods of Sue-killing would surely backfire.
   
   856. I will not take Spock to the Whoverse planet Vulcan.
   
   857. Importing Daleks to another continuum is a Very Bad Idea.
   
   858. I will not recruit anyone who can buy or sell under any version of the Beast. They will betray us.
   
   859. I will not dare anyone to push an Agent's berserk buttion.
   -Especially if said Agent has built-in weapons.
   
   860. I will not move Gilgamesh and Enkidu's battle with the Bull of Heaven to a china shop.

I am not allowed to use PPC technology in order to win bets on horse races in the Real World.

I am not allowed to swap Rose from Doctor Who for 'Belle de Jour' from 'Secret Diary of a Call Girl'. It would leave both of them VERY confused.
- Incidentally, even if I am a French-speaking Agent, I am not allowed to kidnap Belle and bitch at her about the fact that she spells her assumed last name 'de Jour' rather than 'du Jour'.

I am not allowed to send the misprinted Kama Sutra edition from the xkcd comic 'Mistranslations' (http://www.xkcd.com/414/) to the Department of Bad Slash.
- They've already seen it.
- They'd rather badficcers didn't get hold of it.
- And it would probably be best to keep it away from Agent Luxury, too.

Putting Faithful from the Song of the Lioness Quartet and Gaspode the Wonder Dog from the Discworld in the same room is a bad idea. Either they'll try and kill each other or they'll end up plotting.

No matter what he says, Mr. Wednesday of 'American Gods' is NOT an ally of the PPC, or an old friend of the Great Goddess Bast.
- It would be well to remember that Bast of 'American Gods' is not the same person as the PPC's Bast, either.


I am not allowed to use PPC technology in order to go back in time and insert 'write canon slash!' subliminal messages into J.K. Rowling's mind.
-Or Tolkien's mind.
-Or .. in fact, no slashy subliminal messages for ANY authors.
-Or non-slashy ones. No subliminal messages at all.

1. I will not allow Vajra larvae inside PPC HQ
   -Not even if I intend to sing to it every day to try and tame it
   -We don't need killer alien insects with a hive mind and teleportational capabilities trying to rescue one of their own
   
   802. My singing can be considered a form of torture that I should not inflict upon any other Agents unless they are fully protected with industrial strength earplugs. Therefore I should not sing around HQ.
   -Singing around a Sue is still fine, as long as my partner and any canons cannot hear me.
   
   803. I am not a Gundam.
   -Nor am I a Valkyrie.
   -I am not a mecha of any description. Unless I am, in which case I will disregard this.
   
   804. Just because a canon character uses a tackle-glomp as a battle tactic, it doesn't mean that I am allowed to do the same.
   -Especially not when my target is my lust object.
   
   805. Likewise, if I am in a canon where squeeing, stampeding, barely controlled drooling, confessions of undying love and frequent attempts at glomping lust objects is normal, I will not engage in such activities 'to blend in'.
   -No, not even if my lust object attempts to flirt with me

Upon trawling through Board pages I missed: That would be me, and it would be the one Agent Paddlebrains was newbie!shepherd for.

Welcome! Bleepolate is the nicer option to Bleepka, especially if you don't care for headaches and the like. Good to meet someone new, and please ignore the marbles rattling around!

*offers homemade oatmeal cookies* Thank you for sacrificing your sanity for the sake of others. Most of us can't tell up from down anymore. Don't worry, these cookies are the arsenic proof batch--I think...*goes to check*

Hiya! Welcome! I give you a coxcomb, which is a sort of silly hat.

Here, have a graduated cylinder and a mini-glomp from some fiery mini-Balrogs and mini-Dragons.

And I'd give you burn salves if I had them. x]

Welcome, welcome! Let me point you towards the List of Everything PPC at Livejournal: http://community.livejournal.com/the_ppc/20306.html

~Enelya

Trust me, they're useful.

Welcome! I suppose you don't need warnings about how crazy things are here, so I'll just get right down to competing with Trojie for recruition - the Department of Mary Sues could always use new people.

The others have already said or given you everything very important... except rabies. Beware of July; when you greet the next newbie, don't usurp her Link Giving authority. 'tis Dangerous - and yes, that capital was intended.

Bah, I ramble. Welcome! *glomps*

I gift you with an egg whisk! It's shiny, gold-plated, and whisks not only eggs but author wraiths and spambots! Use it for good and not evil.

Welcome to the insanity!

*shoves bleeprin and bleepka at you* Dunno why no one mentioned these yet...chances are you'll need 'em before long...

Welcome to the board! ^_^

BTW, will your Agents be stationed in a response center or a TARDIS?

*hands platter of lembas*

And may I say, as Recruitment Officer for the Department of Bad Slash, that we're always looking for new recruits?

-Trojie

The first is to smite Mary Sues with in the Flowers' name, the second in case you run into Lux. Not sure if she's still around/written with anymore (though I think she's one of the few TOS characters that is), but hey, better safe than sorry. Unless you like being jumped on by a nymphomaniac with no provocation, anyway. I'm pretty sure I know you from the same place PA does, so welcome! Hope you have fun here, and don't forget to get Permission before you run around with your own agents (though I'd advise being active for a month or so first so we get to know you better). ;)

We already know each other, but welcome to the board! I'm sure you'll fit right in...

I'm sorry, did that sound ominous? It wasn't meant to...

Here, have it. It's good for killing Sues and other threats, but please remember that deadly weapons are not to be pointed at allies or canons.

If you haven't visited the Wiki, then it would be informative for you to do so. The Original Series (not to be confused with Star Trek) is also recommended reading. Do it, or hS will set Kaitlyn on you.

If someone gives you a link to a Legendary Badfic (and they shouldn't, because it is generally a Very Bad Idea), do not follow it. They are brain-breaking, mostly NSFW and certain ones will instil such random psychoses as the fear of the word lav- *is muffled by nearby Boarder* Even the summaries can be brain-breaking.

Legendary Goodfic on the other hand, should be read and enjoyed by all.

Welcome, enjoy your stay and check your sanity at the door. You won't need such a thing here.

Should you feel the need to borrow my of my Agents, they are available.

I mean, how often do you get to burn down a giant talking tree?

Er. About the village... uh... surely there's someone who can do fire control.

Or you could transport it elsewhere before burning it? But how to move the Deku Tree... that could get messy.

I suppose Samuel and Kat will want to help - they technically do exist now, even if they're completely lacking in wiki pages and writing other than my one tiny interlude.

Agents Eledhwen and Christianne wish they could bring their minis to contribute, but they're ready to roast marshmallows and sing "John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt".

And if you're desperate for more than just those in the Action Departments, Lori and Bill are also interested.

You burn it, you set the whole Lost Wood and Kokiri Village on fire, killing the tree. Unless you like doing Ganon's work him, don't burn it. Just get exorcise it; it'll be tougher, but you won't burn the whole forest down. Or kill the Kokiri. Or the Skull Kid.

I know nothing about the Deku Tree or the Legend of Zelda, but I DO know about bonfires! So I'm voting for that! Agent Anjilly would bring s'more fixings! And Agent Brenden would...yeah, let's not give him any ideas...

Agents Arti, Liadan and Lunac are up for it. If you're needing canonical magic, they've got a few copies of Din's Fire in their RC, along with Fire Arrows and the like. The perks of being in the Video Gaming Department...
But yes, anyway, all three are highly familiar with the LoZ continua, so they can help with whatever you need.

*grabs flamethrower, matches, napalm and marshmallows.*

You have Ansela and Risa's support for the burning of this giant tree.

And Crispin would love to help. He is a former DOGA agent, after all. Burning is his favorite pastime.

Burning's the best option here, the tree's pretty much warped to the point of not being the Deku Tree anymore. Technically I can't drop by with agents yet, but I'll definitely read it.

...I believe I remember this 'fic. I'd burn it. That's NOT the Deku Tree.

And so Agents Zach and Sara will bring the chips and salsa. XDDD

And I vote burniness.

Because...because...um... fire? Yes. Because FIRE.

*is incoherent at 3am~*

Um, pretty please? I, er, suck at drawing the people that come out of my head. I can draw other people, sometimes, but... not them. x.X

I'd feel all guilty going 'draw me something!' and not giving anything in return, though... hm. Well, I'm good at drawing things that aren't people, though it tends to take me a while, and I'm pretty good at writing, so if you want something along those lines, consider me at your service.
...I can also sing stuff. I'm still working with my computer on that front, but if you come up with something you want sung by a mezzo-soprano (I think that's the technical term), let me know. =P

So yeah.
Um.
Right. Agents Katrina and Samuel. I don't think we need me in the mix; that could get... interesting. Kat's short, athletic, with mid-length curly strawberry-blonde hair that's usually braided; Samuel is tall, somewhat lanky, with long black hair simply tied back. White streaks at his temples, silver bracelet on his right wrist. PPC uniforms are nifty. They do have a ypur, if you have spare time, room, and get bored. :P

...there are no existing images. Color would be awesome if you have time. Icons... I want to say yes but I don't want to add to your workload, and I have no idea what I'd do with them anyway.

Hm, about the picture... I have this image in my mind of Samuel sitting near the console reading a book and Kat bugging him in some manner, but I'm not wedded to it. (That would be awkward.)

Look, ma, no more wall of text! =D

... I just like seeing other people's interpretations of my characters. ^_^; My agents (Supernumerary/Nume, Ilraen, Jennifer Robinson/Jenni) all have Wiki pages with descriptions, and I have pictures of all of them in my deviantART gallery. Searches for their names/nicknames and "PPC" within the gallery should turn up all the results you need. (I might just make a PPC folder while I'm thinking about it, too.) You can do Ilraen as an Andalite or in morph, either way.

If it's to be a trade, I'll offer plushies of your character or characters of choice in return. I'll use color if you do. {= ) However, be advised that you could be waiting a long time for my end. I'm just slow and easily distracted.

~Neshomeh

I can only draw cartoons, but I think they're worthy of a trade.

My devArt account has pics of my agents and Molly and Moses, do you need a link to them?

I'll order one picture of myself and my Agents Kumori Tenki and Georgia Branch. I'll even offer up an exchange, how about that? :) I'll draw you in a Santa outfit, it'll be fun (especially since I can work mittens into a Christmas theme outfit).

Kumori is very tall, due to some very odd dimensions listed in her original fanfic, has shortish-green hair in a spiky style and green eyes. Georgia is 16, slightly shorter than avegerage, and has shoulder-length, curly red hair, brown eyes and a ridiculous amount of freckles. She also wears a red wooly beanie at all times. No icons please, if I want any I'll make my own.

And I echo ArticBlade, in that I will gladly write something for you, on the subject/character of your choice, in exchange.

A picture of myself and my agents would be wonderful. ^^

I'll email you links to one or two of myself. Avatar-maker pictures (and physical descriptions) of Teek and Crebaina can be found on my Freewebs site (freewebs.com/teekandcrebaina, click on "Agent Bios"), and another of Teek on her Wiki page.

For Crelmos... well, he might be a bit difficult, but pictures and info on Cardassians can be found here:
http://memory-alpha.org/en/wiki/Cardassian

Black-and-white is fine, by the way. ^^

A little more info (and self-pictures) in forthcoming e-mail.

I have to say again, this is so sweet of you. ^w^

Awesome, thanks Lily.If I could draw, I'd do an exchange, but my stick men gt made fun of by other stick men...
I currently have three Agents, Arti, Lunac and Liadan. Lunac and Arti have very basic descriptions on the Wiki, but I can provide more info if you need it.
Liadan, on the other hand, will have to be created. Hmm... I'll get back to you!

Just a question first, if that's okay. When does this expire? I'm asking because, while I'm interested, I don't have Permission yet and therefore my agents don't technically exist yet (and while I do have their bios and stuff, I don't know if I'd be allowed to request for this without it anyway. It's not a mission, but having agents implies having a spinoff, which you do need it for. A bit of a hazy area), and I was going to try again either late November or early December (before Christmas). Naturally, if the offer expires before that, I would be up the creek without a paddle, so I just thought I would ask, thank you for your time.